Twin XL: The Podcast

In this episode, we watch the Netflix documentary Operation Varsity Blues: The College Admissions Scandal so you don’t have to! We’ll discuss what happened in this now-infamous case, what this documentary brings to the conversation, and most importantly, what parents can learn from this whole situation (Lesson one: NO BRIBERY!).Operation Varsity Blues: The College Admissions Scandal2019 College Admissions Bribery Scandal on Wikipedia Rich students get better SAT scores- here’s whyE-mail Laura and BethFollow TwinXL on FacebookFollow TwinXL on TwitterSupport TwinXL on Patreon

In this episode, we’re focusing on a specific group of listeners- the parents of high school seniors who are about to make a choice about where to attend college in the fall. How has the pandemic impacted their students’ college search? Is it harder to get in this year? Did a lot of members of the Class of 2024 defer their acceptance or take a gap year, and does that mean there’s less room in the Class of 2025? We are joined by Emily Roper-Doten, Dean of Admission and Financial Aid at Olin College of Engineering, to hear about what’s really going on in admissions this year and how parents can be supportive as their students make this big decision.Ten Ways to Help Your Teen with the College DecisionVaccine timing fortunate for admissionsE-mail Laura and BethFollow TwinXL on FacebookFollow TwinXL on TwitterSupport TwinXL on Patreon

It’s been ten months since our last episode, and we are excited to bring you season 2! To kick things off, we’re looking back on what we knew about colleges and their plans in May 2020, what has happened since, and what we might expect to see in the Fall of 2021. How can parents help their students manage the ongoing stressors of the pandemic and make decisions about what to do this fall?Some colleges and universities are planning for a “more normal” fall semesterCould fall bring some return to normalcy? These colleges say yes.Colleges Requiring COVID-19 VaccineE-mail Laura and BethFollow TwinXL on FacebookFollow TwinXL on TwitterSupport TwinXL on Patreon

Parents and students want to have assurances from campuses that the fall semester will happen … either in person, online or a combination. Ultimately, families are looking for a guarantee … but, there is no guarantee right now. With all the uncertainty Laura and Beth chat with Michael Horn, who speaks and writes about the future of education and works with a portfolio of education organizations to improve the life of each and every student. He is the author of the book Choosing College, which "strips away the noise around college to help students and parents understand why they are going to school and how to make better choices, as well as aids schools in designing better experiences."More on Michael Horn: https://michaelbhorn.com/about/https://www.forbes.com/sites/michaelhorn/2020/04/26/for-this-years-graduates-a-year-of-purpose/#3bee87ee60bahttps://www.forbes.com/sites/michaelhorn/2020/05/07/what-students-can-do-on-a-gap-year-during-the-pandemic/#26ae2b5f760bhttps://www.globalcitizenyear.org/https://www.insidehighered.com/admissions/article/2020/05/19/one-third-high-school-seniors-say-they-will-defer-or-cancel-ratherhttps://slate.com/technology/2020/05/online-college-fall-2020.html

Laura and Beth examine how colleges and universities are addressing these annual traditions – both transactional (registration, housing, etc.) and celebratory in real time. These resources are a start, but we would recommend parents and families have conversations with their student about keeping communication lines open with one another on these issues, and when communicating with campuses, remember that while people are working remote, most institutions are maintaining standard operating hours, and be respectful of those hours.https://www.vox.com/the-goods/2020/4/1/21197425/coronavirus-missed-graduation-milestones-studentshttps://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/13/us/Coronavirus-college-commencement-ceremonies.htmlhttps://www.cnbc.com/2020/04/02/how-the-class-of-2020-became-the-class-of-covid-19.htmlhttps://www.collegian.psu.edu/news/campus/article_130cc190-7451-11ea-88e8-aba53418dc50.html

Laura and Beth are joined by Dr. Rich DeCapua of OneClass and Dr. Pat Whitely of the University of Miami to discuss higher education’s response to the Coronavirus pandemic and offer thoughts about how parents can manage the early and unexpected return of their students.CDC Coronavirus PageInside Higher Ed Coronavirus PageCampuses Shutter for Coronavirus, Leaving Some LGBTQ Students with Nowhere to GoE-mail Laura and BethFollow TwinXL on FacebookFollow TwinXL on TwitterSupport TwinXL on Patreon

Your student needs to make time to get to their campus career center. As our guest, Carolyn Tidwell says – Go Early, Go Often! Students seeking to find great employment, not just “a job” need to make every effort they can to make their resume and cover letter shine, and get the experience that will help them stand out from the pack!NACE: First Destination Surveyhttps://www.naceweb.org/job-market/graduate-outcomes/first-destination/class-of-2018/Study Suggests Many College Graduates as “Under Employed” https://learningenglish.voanews.com/a/study-suggests-many-college-graduates-are-underemployed/4543268.htmlSoft Skillshttps://search.proquest.com/openview/aa5f345bde23cacbf99574378aeef44b/1?pq-origsite=gscholar&cbl=46775Carolyn’s Linked in: https://www.linkedin.com/in/carolyntidwell/Basic Black Episode: https://www.wgbh.org/program/basic-black/job-market-for-college-graduates-of-color

You have likely heard the current “Mental Health Crisis” on college campuses being discussed in the news. How serious is the problem? What does it mean for you and your student? Learn how you can coach them through a challenging time and help them to use their campus resources effectively.Stressed and Depressed on Campus Part 1Stressed and Depressed on Campus Part 2Stressed and Depressed on Campus Part 3Stressed and Depressed on Campus Part 4As stigma ebbs, college students seek mental health help and campuses struggle to meet needState of Mind: Universities and colleges take innovative approaches to mental healthEpisode 3 of TwinXL: Up All Night (Sleep Management)E-mail Laura and BethFollow TwinXL on FacebookFollow TwinXL on TwitterSupport TwinXL on Patreon

It’s time for a break! In the U.S. this week, college students are on break for Thanksgiving, and in mid-to-late December the Winter Break begins. What can you expect when you welcome your student home from school? How can you and your student make the break fun and relaxing and keep the stress to a minimum? What do you do if your student comes home and says, “I don’t want to go back?”Join us for a conversation about making the most of break, WKRP, breakups, parties, and much more. Don’t miss our last episode of 2019!Three Ways to Make Your College Freshman’s Thanksgiving Break a Success: https://grownandflown.com/college-student-thanksgiving-break/ How To Better Conquer the Long Winter Break: https://grownandflown.com/better-conquer-long-winter-break/A Time of Thanksgiving: https://www.washcoll.edu/families/a-time-of-thanksgiving.php
If you’d like us to answer your college parenting question on a future episode, please contact us!
E-mail Laura and Beth at twinxlpod@gmail.comFollow TwinXL on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TwinXLPod/Follow TwinXL on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TwinXLPodSupport TwinXL on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TwinXLPodcast


Your student has been on campus for a couple of months now. They’ve made friends, settled in, maybe joined a club or activity...you can relax! Until they call you and say, “I didn’t do so well on my midterms and I don’t think this major is for me.” How can you support and coach your student through changing their major? How can you help them figure out if a change is a good idea? What if they haven’t chosen a major yet? Laura and Beth chat with Lynn Zlotkowski, Director of the Wolak Learning Center at Southern New Hampshire University, about helping your student navigate their academic plans.Data Point: Beginning College Students Who Change Their Majors Within 3 Years of EnrollmentWhen Your College Student Changes Majors5 Considerations When Telling Parents About Changing Your MajorE-mail Laura and BethFollow TwinXL on FacebookFollow TwinXL on TwitterSupport TwinXL on Patreon

Laura and Beth talk about the LBGT student in college, joined by guest Eric Crumrine from Berklee College of Music in Boston. If you want to connect with Eric, feel free to email him: ecrumrine@gmail.comResources related to this episode: PFLAG: “PFLAG is the extended family of the LGBTQ community. We're made up of LGBTQ individuals, family members and allies. Because together, we're stronger.”Trevor Project: “The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning youth. “The Campus Pride Index: “The Campus Pride Index is a vital tool for assisting campuses in learning ways to improve their LGBTQ campus life and ultimately shape the educational experience to be more inclusive, welcoming and respectful of LGBTQ and Ally people.”Articles from Association of American Colleges & Universities:Making Excellence Inclusive: Higher Education’s LGBTW ContextsQueer Theory’s Relevance to Student LearningCampus Climate: The Good and the Still Very Bad

Family Weekend is happening on many campuses during October. Should you go to your student’s campus for this event? What makes Family Weekend fun- and why might you decide to skip it and go another time? Laura and Beth talk about ways to plan for a great campus visit, and how to let your student show off their campus and include you in their experience.Family Weekend- What to ExpectWhy You Should Go to College Family Weekend...After it’s OverE-mail Laura and BethFollow TwinXL on FacebookFollow TwinXL on TwitterSupport TwinXL on Patreon

Episode 9 - Parenting a student through their first year of college can be an emotional roller coaster from the parent and for the student. Parents may not be equipped to consider the impact of the change in their home life will look like. Parenting through “facetime” is different from having your child under the same roof. It can also be a time of rejuvenation for the parent who is seeking to find their own – new – life. Laura and Beth are joined by Beth Niernberg, who is entering her “sophomore year” of parenting her oldest child through their college experience – and she has opinions about how things went during the first year.When the Kids Leave Home, What’s Next? How to Thrive in an Empty NestPatreonFacebookTwitterE-mail Laura and Beth

Episode 8: In recent years, close to 20% of college students reported a disability. How do students with disabilities get access to the accommodations and services they need on campus? As the parent of a student with a disability, how can you support them while also helping them learn to advocate for themselves? Laura and Beth are joined by Chip Kennedy of Harvard University Disability Services for a conversation about the transition from K-12 to higher education for students with disabilities.Differences Between K-12 and Postsecondary EducationHow Students with Disabilities, and Their Parents, Need to Prepare for CollegeFor Parents: Adjusting to CollegePatreonFacebookTwitterE-mail Laura and Beth

The first six weeks of college are not only fun and exciting- they're also a key time for students to get connected to their campus community, and that can be one of the many factors that leads to student success. Unfortunately, they’re also a time of high risk for students. In this episode, Laura and Beth talk about how parents can coach their students through this crucial time. Step one: make them stay at school!The Importance of the First Six Weeks of CollegeThe First Six Weeks of CollegeReducing Risk During the First Few Weeks on Campus PatreonFacebookTwitterE-mail Laura and Beth

Why is college student mental health in the news all the time? Is it worse these days than it used to be? Learn how a growth mindset help your student! This episode helps you learn how to support from a distance … because remember, you can’t do it all for them. Beth and Laura talk about how failing can be a good thing. National College Health Assessment Fall 2018 Reference Group Executive Summary (page 13) https://www.acha.org/documents/ncha/NCHA-II_Fall_2018_Reference_Group_Executive_Summary.pdf What Does it Mean to Have a Growth Mindset? https://www.bigthinkedge.com/blog/what-does-it-mean-to-have-a-growth-mindset Growth Mindset Parenting https://www.mindsetworks.com/parents/growth-mindset-parenting Managing a Mental Health Condition in College https://www.nami.org/Find-Support/Teens-Young-Adults/Managing-a-Mental-Health-Condition-in-College Black Girls Don’t Get to Be Depressed https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/news/a50692/black-girls-dont-get-to-be-depressed/ College Students of Color: Overcoming Mental Health Challenges https://www.nami.org/Blogs/NAMI-Blog/July-2018/College-Students-of-Color-Overcoming-Mental-Healt

There were 15 “Very Special Episodes” of the sitcom “Blossom”, and it if works for Blossom it works for TwinXL. This episode gets serious, but we wouldn’t be serious if it wasn’t important. In this episode, Beth and Laura tell you what you and your student need to know about consent and sexual assault. How are colleges expected to respond to this issue? And tips on how to talk about this challenging issue with your student. Going to College: What Families Need to Know About Sexual Assault and Safety on Campus www.drew.edu/titleix-eeo-aa/wp-content/uploads/sites/42/2017/08/what-families-need-know-sexual-assault-safety-campus.pdf How to Talk to Young People About the Kavanaugh Story https://www.npr.org/2018/09/21/650039170/how-to-talk-to-young-people-about-the-kavanaugh-story Action Plan for Parents: Preventing College Sexual Assault https://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/action-plan-parents-preventing-college-sexual-assault/ Statistics from the National Sexual Violence Resource Center https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics Statistics from the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network https://www.rainn.org/statistics/campus-sexual-violence Title IX Basics from Know Your IX https://www.knowyourix.org/college-resources/title-ix/

Parents of students from K-12 are used to communication from their child’s school. In fact you probably get TOO MUCH communication. It is no wonder that parents of college students have a tough time with the lack of and restricted communication from colleges and universities. Why is this? FERPA. But, you may say, I thought there was FERPA in the K-12. There is … but it changes when students hit college, and no matter if you pay the bill, you don’t get to have the free communication that you may be seeking. In this episode, Laura is surrounded by Beths! In addition to her co-host, we welcome Beth Devonshire of D. Stafford and Associates to talk about student privacy, why students may lie to their parents, and when and why you should call or expect a call. Some pretty weird ads for Newport Lights from the 80s treyspeegle.com/010113/2015/11/25/newports-alive-with-pleasure-campaign-is-subliminal-ad-101 Parents’ Guide to FERPA (see the last question for college info) https://www2.ed.gov/policy/gen/guid/fpco/brochures/parents.html FERPA FAQ https://www2.ed.gov/policy/gen/guid/fpco/faq.html What Are College Parental Notification Policies? https://www.collegeparentcentral.com/2009/10/what-are-college-parental-notification-policies/

Wellness: it’s not all bath bombs and face masks. For college students, it’s making choices about well-being that support their academic success. For them- and for all of us- sleep is probably the MOST important thing we can do to maintain our well-being. Learn more about why it’s important and how to encourage your student to get higher-quality sleep. In this episode of TwinXL Beth and Laura give you the low down on why you kid may hit a wall from exhaustion and illness, and how you can coach them through some lifestyle choices that will help them stay healthy – even when you aren’t there to tell them to go to sleep and eat their veggies. National College Health Assessment Fall 2018 Reference Group Executive Summary (Page 17) https://www.acha.org/documents/ncha/NCHA-II_Fall_2018_Reference_Group_Executive_Summary.pdf Causes and consequences of sleepiness among college students https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4075951/ Sleep, Learning, and Memory healthysleep.med.harvard.edu/healthy/matters/benefits-of-sleep/learning-memory Sleep Rocks! Get More of It! https://www.uhs.uga.edu/sleep Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/592377/burnout-by-emily-nagoski-phd-and-amelia-nagoski-dma/9781984817068/ Bed Fans https://bedfans-usa.com Sleep Supplies- Items to help your student practice good sleep hygiene Earplugs Sleep mask White noise machine and/or fan Mattress topper

Don’t forget to pack your tapestry, twinkle lights, and your shower caddy- we're moving into the dorm! How to help your student navigate roommate relationships and start their on-campus life on the right foot. Also, what is an RA and what do they do? 

Being an RA is where Beth and Laura got their start … so you know they know their dorm rooms! All the cinderblock luxury of them! And Laura gives you her Patent Pending #deveauprotip roommate success call guide: Call one – The Introduction Call two – The housekeeping call Call three – What are you like on your worst day? Learn From My Mistakes and Avoid These Common Roommate Problems: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/08/02/smarter-living/common-roommate-problems.html How a College Roommate Can Affect Your Child: https://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/02/24/how-a-college-roommate-can-affect-your-child/ How to Help Your College Student Prepare for Living With a Roommate: https://www.collegeparentcentral.com/2010/07/how-to-help-your-college-student-prepare-for-living-with-a-roommate/

If you’re about to send your kid off to college, it’s time to have The Talk- and we don’t mean the Birds and the Bees! In this episode, Laura and Beth introduce the podcast and talk about the things you should discuss with your kid as they prepare to become a college student! And you begin to prepare to parent “remotely”. Topics to Cover Finances (who pays for what, what’s their budget, etc.)- go over their financial aid package and bill with them, because it’s their bill, not yours Communication (When and how and how often will you communicate) Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll (What are your values and expectations around partying?) Relationships (consent, respect, sexual misconduct- you can find a guide specific to this here.) Grades (when/if-how they will share information about their academic performance) Vital documents and information- make sure they have essential items like their health insurance card Things to Practice (Have them do these things before they go away) Ask them to find the list of things they need to do for their specific school before they arrive on campus- they will likely find this on the school’s orientation webpage. They should be responsible for completing the tasks with your help and support as needed. Make their own medical appointment (and/or dentist) Pick up a prescription Do their own laundry Go to the grocery store Make a budget Resources 5 Best Budget Apps for College Students https://blog.cort.com/college/5-best-budget-apps-for-college-students/ Letting Go, Sixth Edition: https://www.harpercollins.com/9780062400567/letting-go-sixth-edition/ The Naked Roommate: For Parents Only: https://www.harlancohen.com/books/ Why Parents Should Suffer Through College Orientations: https://www.wbur.org/cognoscenti/2012/08/27/parent-college-orientation-barrios