It's About the Connection

On the first episode of season 3 about friendship I talk a little about how you and everyone around us are so very diverse. Our needs and desires in a friendship are different (besides the obvious traits such as trust, honesty etc.)  Some seek deeper family like connection, some  don't and some just need a basic friendly acquaintance to fulfill their social world.  And all of this is ok. Yes. I believe in my core that life is more beautiful and fulfilling when we do life with each other while seeking meaning connections but the reality is in some cases it's not practical for everyone OR the whole friendship making  or keeping game is still new and uncomfortable.  But I think it all starts with asking yourself one little question...well maybe two.1.) What am I desiring or need in my current friendships or new ones in the time of my life. 2.) Expectations of others. What are my expectations? Are they practical, simple or do you have such high expectations of your friend's that it's no wonder why things are one sided?We are all humans just trying to figure things out but when it comes to figuring out life with different types of folks we want to invite into our lives things can get kind of complicated BUT it doesn't have to.Follow the podcast Instagram so I can hear your very vital feedback on your friendships and  answers to my questions on all things connection. @itsaboutthe.connection Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

After returning to California from a lovely life in the U. K. in the beginning of 2021 I was back in my home turf reconnecting with old relationships. The whole year I was unexpectedly  being taught new lessons and understandings on friendships on a whole new level.  I have always had a love for people and my relationships but wow did I gain a fresh perspective on the importance of friendships/connections in our lives and I am so grateful to share my experiences with you. And it's important to toss some very vital data and research in the mix!In this season expect topics on:-Self-compassion (it's start with loving YOURSELF first before being a good friend to others)-Engaging in healthy conflicts-Long Distance Friendships-Why it's harder to make friends in your 30s-Conversations with my most dearest of pals And sooo much MORE. For behind the scenes and fun tidbits follow the podcast Instagram @itsaboutthe.connectionA poem from @yung_pueblo ( find him on Instagram for more connection poems)Signs of a deep friend connection:laughter is abundant honesty is encouraged vulnerability is welcomedsupport is real and activeyou can put your guard downyou inspire each other to growyou give each other good advice they help during times of struggleboth of you feel stronger togetherSupport the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

This is the last conversation of season 2 and it's exactly that.  A conversation. It wasn't prepared, there is no theme or topic. Just two chicks who met while volunteering at Brighton and Hove emergency Food hub in the U.K. Kristin shares a little about her life growing up in Germany, finding a career as a flight attendant and how she no longer allows shame to hold her captive. In 2020 Kristin went through a tragic loss of a family member and got through it with the help of her close connections and some unexpected connections...Our conversation was short and sweet but full of little gems to take away. My hope is that we all find the motivation to get to know one another on different levels. To spark up conversations with the person you've been trying to get to know allowing the fruit of our lives to shine through while we connect through our openness. Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

In this episode Lucy shares with us her story as a young girl raised in Ireland during a war, struggling in academics but finally finding her calling as a chef in one of London's best hotels. She takes us on a journey of being one of the first women to be hired as a chef at the Intercontinental . It was there when struggles with certain tasks surfaced. As she continued to grow as a chef and started her own catering business the  struggles continued until she was encouraged to finally seek assistance.She was finally able to put language to the struggles and was diagnosed with dyslexia. It is important to note that dyslexia does not hinder intelligence and Lucy is a perfect example of a woman who's overcome any stigma about having dyslexia. Lucy thrives off the company of other people. The perfect example of an extravert.  She also teaches us a little something about a form of connection called intergenerational care. Her story is not only interesting but inspiring.Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

In this conversation Marcy is opened and honest about her personal  journey from the past to present. As an American woman living in U.K. comes with loads of emotions. Homesickness, lack of connections and the simplicity of familiarity.Marcy opens  up about her experience while being apart a religious organization for most her youth but after she started to question her own faith as a Jehovah Witness she made the decision to leave after feeling the sense of disconnection and conditional love. Throughout it all Marcy shares ways that she stays centered and positive , she embraces the  life she chose for herself, and inspirationally honors her ancestors and  finds her creative mojo in the most unexpected time. Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

In this episode Jen Jarvis from the band Seeker takes us on a truly opened and honest journey through her life as a mother of three, wife, singer/song writer and the many other hats she wears. In this conversation she paints an image of her song writing experiences. One after the devastating news of her mothers' illness and on a night when life just seemed to be a bit to much which lead to Seeker's new song 'Come Rushing In' which is featured at the end of this episode.  A deep, authentic and meaningful conversation that left me thinking about how our own past traumas don't have to be hidden. They shape and define us. And the broken pieces can be mended back together with new life. The art of repairing our lives with gold and the a great representation of that  is the Japanese art called Kintsugi.If you love the bonus content please support my friends Seeker by checking them out on websites below:Seeker's information:website-http://www.seekermusic.co.uk/?fbclid=IwAR0YSKose64FQ8l5x6LMibJKLzhOIUfZMkPB5UzLkIAHFzc8FsxE5nPkL9MBlog-https://theimpossibleadventure.wordpress.com/?fbclid=IwAR2XKNm-szmtVUyKy9FmUQ96g1ptpJVt6HPTif3Lm81v2igTmpwixUUQfAoFB-https://www.facebook.com/seekermusicPateron Support-https://www.patreon.com/seekermusicSupport the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Part 2 is a continuation of reflections on the past and present and putting language to an emotion that everyone has felt at least once in there life. But how do we react and deal with that emotion? How does it effect us and keep us more disconnected? Nicolette reads a short passage about the effects of loneliness from a book called Together written by Vivek Murthy . In the passage Vivek explains that loneliness itself can be the thing that keeps us from connecting with one another due to many factors, such as shame and fear of being labeled and judged by others. When we can identify that we might be feeling lonely instead of turning inwards let's discover the many ways to filling the void. Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

In this episode Nicolette records in an empty flat just two days before flying back to The States to call it home again. It was while living in the U.K. that an emotion was felt that she could not recognize right away but lead her to this creation of this podcast.Finally, she coming to the conclusion that the very feeling was an outcome of not having genuine and authentic relationships in her life abroad...but what was that that feeling? Loneliness. Loneliness is our natural emotional signal to inform us that we are in need of connection, conversation and feeling included.That discovery was the first step to understanding and embracing her love for people and passion for the world to connect with one another and combat the loneliness epidemic.  Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Season 2 is a collection of conversations with the people Nicolette had the pleasure of connecting with while living in the U.K. and also personal reflections on her life, why platonic relationships are so important to her and how a an emotion we don't talk about often helped encourage her to be intentional about making new connections.Trying to navigate through the pandemic and keeping all safety measures wasn't easy but not impossible. During the last few months of 2020 IATC was able to continue. And just to add a little flavor to the mix a new life decision was thrown in. Moving back to the USA...and yes..in the midst of the pandmeic! It is now the year 2021. And the mission of this podcast stays the same but there seems to always be more to add. Spreading awareness for our need for social connectedness is the primary focus but how do we get there? We need to talk further about the shame of loneliness, how to feel like we belong in this big world and finding ways to empower each other to feel confident in relationship building. To support this podcast check out:https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcastPlease follow the IATC podcast Instagram and FB! instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itsaboutthe.connection/?hl=enFB: https://www.facebook.com/itsabouttheconnectionSupport the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Serving others is deeply meaningful and there are so many ways to do it but sometimes you got to start off with finding out what's in it for you first. In this episode Nicolette breaks down the reasons why volunteering and giving away your time to others is beneficial for your mental health, giving you feelings of self efficacy, accomplishment and interpersonal connection with others. We are busy people with not enough hours in our day to pursue all our needs so how could we possibly begin to think about giving our time away to others? Nicolette shares a report and detailed experiments on how Giving Away Your time Gives You Time. (full report in link below).In order to become well-rounded healthy minded people we need to start somewhere. And it starts with the Golden Rule "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you'"https://www.scribd.com/document/90848882/Report-Giving-Time-Gives-You-Timehttps://youtu.be/V3L5oNQHylgSupport the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Jo Glazebrook wraps up the Do Good Feel Good series by giving us the details of how a team of amazing people in Brighton and Hove U.K. came together to create the emergency food hub during the pandemic. She describes how people from all over the city lent a helping hand with whatever they could. It was a true sense of coming together during hard times. Each person within the series was contacted by Jo to build what we now and forever will call 'The Shop'.  Oddly enough the pandemic brought us all together but the 'The Shop' helped us create connection without even knowing it. Jo is also the project manager at the Brighton and Hove Food Partnership which is an amazing non-profit that organizes cookery courses, a community garden, shares meals in the city and spreads awareness on food waste.The Shop's evolution is an amazing example of what people can do when forced to rely on one another but do it because it's our human instinct to come alongside anyone who is in need. Interested in knowing more about the organization? Click below. https://bhfood.org.uk/Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Evie O'Rourke shares her personal journey through medicine. She shares her opinions and is opened and honest about what she believes a GOOD doctor really is. She also talks about student burn out, the reasons why she loves medicine and how one american TV show inspired her to become a doctor. She also created and Instagram page that is focuses on providing information for those who are thinking about going into medicine.Follow her @evie_does_medicineSupport the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

In this episode Nicolette talks to a woman who is also in the 'connecting' business. Her name is Jo Wren and she and a great team of people are re-connecting folks back to nature for it’s very free natural ways of healing. Grow is the charity that herself and a team of people helped establish. We talk about the importance of making nature a priority in your life, the science behind it and most importantly remembering we are all interconnected. You can find out more about the program on their website below. http://www.growingwellbeing.org.uk/Also on Instagram @growing_wellbeing Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Kevin shares his early beginnings as a young boy born in Dublin raised in an idyllic childhood. From being introduced to international cuisine by his mother which in those days were very uncommon and being the popular home in the neighborhood surely because the smells were nothing near the typical Irish style suppers. To moving to SoHo in London during a time when the red light district was in full swing and finally realizing at 18 years old he was unhappy and knew there was something missing while living deep in the hustle and bustle of the city. Could it be connection that was missing?Kevin's journey is not only interesting and entertaining but also intertwined with his bits of wisdom he learned and now passed onto us...Reflection in our lives and investing in the relationships that matter to you most. Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Dave Pop shares his journey as a young creative boy from Wales now living in Brighton U.K. as a mural artist using his pop art style that stands out with it's bold brilliant colors and signature Brighton imagery. We talk about the ups, downs and turns arounds as a freelance artist during a pandemic and how he continues to stay positive even when the going get's tough. You can find his work on his website at https://www.davepopart.com/ Follow his instagram @davepopartDon't forget to check out the Choccy youtube where Dave shows chocolate skills: https://youtu.be/7MF4u1bEZY8Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

In the very first 'unplanned bonus' episode Nicolette talks openly about the inequalities happening in America and also coming to terms with the possible biases she may have held and understanding more in depth about systemic racism.Seeing and hearing about it on the news in another country has given her a new perspective on the topic. It's not just in the States but everywhere. It's also a uncomfortable conversation for some but it must be talked about. It will take a lot of learning and unlearning. But it is possible and it begins with the heart. Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

In this episode Nicolette gives you a break down on the definition of what human connection means to her and also by dissecting 5 major elements within the 'googled' definition: energy exchange, paying attention to one another, deepening the moment, inspiring change and building trust.A lot of us might have the wrong idea of what connection truly means. It doesn't mean you have to be the best of friends to connect with someone but within us is an innate need to connect with one another on a certain type of level...and there are simple ways to do it!I also tie is Brene Brown's anatomy of trust. She created an acronym called BRAVING which is such a helpful way for all of us to to remember the key elements that make-up trust.So let's start to understand this whole human connection thing together shall we?Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)

Join Nicolette on her journey of finally owning her passion for human connection. Being transparent about her newbie at everything life, recently moved aboard and having to create a community of her own made her realize how everyone needs relationships-Without them we'd be goners! She will be inviting some of her favorite people she's met while in Brighton, England. Pulling out stories from their life experiences and hoping it provokes thought, makes us laugh and teaches us a little something we never bothered to think about.Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/IATCpodcast)