GUMBO NIGHTS with Miss Handie

If you're a successful single woman who's dating, are the men you meet in love with your accomplishments or uncomfortable with them? Does your success seem to be a deterrent for men or an attractor? What's your experience?

Are the conversations that women have with other women different than the conversations men have with other men? I've been wondering about this lately and examining how much time my female friends and I waste talking about romantic things that need to be discussed outside of our friendship and inside of romantic relationships.What conversations are you having with men and women and are they different from the ones you have with your romantic partner?

Friends. How many of us have them? How many of us wonder why we're friends with the people we're friends with? If that's a question you've wondered about, this is the episode that you need to hear. Check it out and see if any of my perspectives sound familiar and resonate with you and the friendships you're in now?

Are you active on social media platforms? If so, how often and how do you use social media? I haven't been as active on social media lately because I'm distracted by many of the ways people have chosen to express themselves on a variety of platforms. In this episode, I'll share what I've noticed, explain the difference it's making on many of my friends and I, and reveal what we can do now and next to shift the pattern. I appreciate you being here. Go ahead and press play.

Something I've wanted for a long time has finally happened in my life. I didn't know exactly when it would happen and there were times when I wondered if this day would ever come and thankfully, it did. If you've ever aspired to free yourself from anything, this episode will either fuel you to keep striving or remind you of the progressive path whence you came. Put your feet up, press play and celebrate freedom with me!

I recently dated a guy who criticized me because I don't cook, and I have no interest in learning. The criticism didn't inspire me to learn how to cook and I discovered what might have motivated me to learn and it's a really simple way to win big with me. Press play and hear about my latest aha moment.

Constructive criticism is valuable for our personal and professional growth, but sometimes feedback is hard to swallow even when it's delivered in the most loving ways. Are you too sensitive when others share feedback about your performance at work or your behavior with friends or family? --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

The human being in us often etches dates in our minds based upon the experiences that we associate with those dates. That approach is harmless when the experiences that happened on that date are aligned with fond and delightful memories. But, when certain dates take us to dark places of recollection, the experience can be debilitating and even worse when we make those actions a pattern every year. I recently discovered that today's date is just that…a date. Press play and discover exactly what I mean and how it may help you to break up with dates that hold painful memories. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

One upon a time, I hated my job from top to bottom. When I freed myself from that horrible situation, I took the reins on my career and got intentional about creating the good and great experiences that I desired. I've been enjoying what I do for a living even though I sometimes encounter difficult people. I learned how to enjoy my work despite others who don't enjoy what they do. Owning my engagement made the difference. If you hate your job, it's time to make some decisions that may make you a little uncomfortable now but more joyful later. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

I didn't have any idea what this episode was going to be about so I just hit record and started talking. My words led me to a story about my friend who recently turned down a guy for a date because of one thing that she didn't like about him. A few days later, she changed her mind. Press play to find out why the thing she was obsessed about when it comes to dating isn't such a big deal after all. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

I have experienced some life challenges that tried to break my spirit. There were times when I almost allowed those challenges to defeat me, but five years ago, I got sick of living that way, so I embarked upon a new adventure that led me here… to the podcast launch of “Gumbo Nights with Miss Handie.” February 19, 2019, was the day I recorded and published Episode One, “Toilet Paper Chronicles.” Five years ago and 100 episodes later, we're still striving to make gumbo that brightens your days and seasons your nights. Thank you for listening to the podcast and giving me a fun and safe place to heal while you listen to my stories about everything from heartbreak to celebrating life. I hope something I've shared with you over the past five years and 100 episodes, has inspired you to move towards your healing rather than away from it. Cheers to another year of enlightenment, entertainment and elevation! I love it here! With much love and honey! Miss Handie

Recently, a friend shared some rich dating advice she received from an older gentlemen that I want to share with you. Press play to learn five quick ways to tell if you're romantically compatible with someone before you commit to a long term relationship. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

January finally kicked rocks, so we have an opportunity to make a fresh start in February by making history….Black History. What skills, talents, and resources do you have and how can you use them to better the black experience in your household, neighborhood, community, city, state, etc? What can you offer that will change the world for people that look like us and position you to make Black History? --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

The original version of the film changed my life as a kid and helped me to blossom into a woman who, for the most part, courageously uses her voice to stand up for herself, set boundaries, and express her feelings.  I wouldn't be who I am without the female influence of Whoopi Goldberg (Miss Celie), Oprah Winfrey (Miss Sophia), and Margaret Avery (Shug Avery), but I didn't realize, until recently, just how deeply their influence shows up in my everyday life.  Press play to learn how this discovery has me rethinking the way I navigate life as a woman.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

Have you ever told someone to make themselves at home? If you have, did you really mean it? Has there ever been a time when you regretted saying that to one of your house guests? In this episode, I'm discussing house rules that guests often violate because we've told them to make themselves at home. You may discover something about yourself that makes you a good or bad house guest. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

I don't do episodes specifically for men very often, but this episode is for the guys. There are some important things that single women, who want a committed relationship, have been quiet about. It's time to blow the whistle on those little known secrets so that men can understand the real desires, emotions and sentiments of single women who desire a committed relationship. Gentlemen, you may have thought you've heard everything you need to know about what single women want, but you ain't heard nothing yet. Press play and take notes. You're about to learn something new. #relationships #love #singleladies #romance --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

What do you want more of in 2024? Is it more money, love, sex, patience, or something else? In this episode, I am emphasizing what I want more of and that's rich friendships. What are your friendships like? Are they fruitful and healthy or are they one-sided, selfish, and envy adjacent? Let's evaluate the friendships we have and what we bring to the friendship table. What do we want more of in terms of those friendships and what are we willing to give in order to make it happen? #friendships --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

What's at the top of your Christmas list this year? Is it something expensive, something cheap or something that money can't buy? Press play to discover what's on my list and why I have to have it! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

If you're in a lifestyle, job, or marriage that is accompanied by unhealthy patterns that aren't changing for the better, how do you know when it's time to move on? In this episode, I'll share some real examples in my world that may signal when it's time to pack our bags. Follow Me on Instagram and TikTok @miss.handie. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

Finding out that others don't view us with high regard can come as a surprise when we don't know ourselves better than anyone else. In this episode, we're going to answer some hard questions that require an honest look in the mirror. What is your reflection saying that isn't pretty and what are you going to do about it? --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

Life has been filled with roses and darts this year, and it's got me confused about the why behind it. Press play to find out the latest BIG thing that's left a BIG hole in my life! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

Is anyone having a good dating experience? My friends aren't having good luck and I'm not sure why they aren't. Maybe you have some answers. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

It's about time that I do a couple important things. Press play to find out what they are and discover what it's time for you to do. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

Wednesday, June 7, 2023, is a day that changed my life forever and one I'll never forget. Press play to find out what happened on that day and why it's important to me. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

Sex ranks as the number one aspect of a quality relationship for many people but when times get tough, is sex going to hold your relationship together? Is it the glue that keeps you interested, invested and in love or are there other qualities that are a requirement for you? Let's talk about it! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

For most of my life, people that I've known for long and short periods of time have assumed that they know me better than they really do. There was a time when their incorrect assumptions caused me to audition for them in order to change their minds about the who I am and all that I am. I've evolved past the performance desires and settled into a comfortable and confident place of self-awareness and acceptance and if some don't get me or understand me, that's their issue…not mine. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

I recently tried something indulgent for the first time and now I'm hooked on the experience. Press play and listen to learn what I did and why I love it! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

I never envisioned I'd become the person I am today. I was locked into patterns of believing, assuming, and perceiving that had been since childhood. Life has a way of removing the boundaries and borders that make up our identity when we allow ourselves to think, do and become something we never imagined we'd think, do or become. Here's my story of transformation. Who are you becoming as a result of someone's influence in your life? --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

I recently experienced 11 days full of unexpected, unfamiliar, uncertain and intense moments that caused me to reconsider and reevaluate everything and realize that Adulting is TOUGH yet doable! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/misshandie/message

Black History is all around us…in front, in between, and behind many of the freedoms and privileges that we enjoy everyday. Sometimes we take our Black History for granted. I recently had lightbulb moments that strongly reminded me of Whence I came. What's your Black History “aha” story? --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

I have a dream that's bigger than anything I've ever done, and I'm just days away from the manifestation of it. Because of your trust and support of me for the past four years as the host of this podcast, I am confident that I'm on the right path and that an even bigger, better and greater voice lives within me. Thank you all so much for rocking with Gumbo Nights, and I hope that the success of your next Dream Come True is unexpected in common hours just as Henry David Thoreau proclaimed in one of his infamous quotes. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Do you struggle to let things go even when you've done all that you can do to make it GOOD? If this sounds like YOU, then this episode contains a perspective that may make YOUR life more relaxed, peaceful and enjoyable! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

I've focused my life on being courageous, but I recently discovered that there is a big difference between Courage and Boldness. Listen to this episode to find out all that I've learned about the distinction and why I live in BOLDNESS. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

If you've been looking for LOVE and having a tough time finding it, you've got to listen to this episode. I've discovered a REAL reason why you and your friends haven't found the RIGHT one yet! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

I recently learned that permed hair is causing major health risks in black women. I've been wearing my hair permed for over 30 years, so it was time for me to put my health before my hair. Press play to find out what my journey has been like since I went natural. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

I'm celebrating a two-year anniversary this week and it's a big deal! You'll have to press play to find out what the occasion is and it's not what you think I'm sure! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Everyone is talking about the affair happening between two hosts on Good Morning America, T.J. Holmes and Amy Robach. What do you think about it? Was ABC wrong for taking them off air? I have my own opinions and I hope you'll press play for some interesting perspectives. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Do you offer advice that is unsolicited? Do you get frustrated when people don't do things the way that you do it? If that sounds like you, press play on this episode for a special message. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Being a good FOLLOWER is just as important as being a good LEADER, yet many people have no clue when they should FOLLOW and when they should LEAD. In this episode, you'll hear a real and shocking example of poor leading and following that you don't want to MISS. Press play! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

There are some things I wish I would have known and some things I wished I'd done differently as it relates to love, men, and sex. Press play to hear all about it. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

There are times when you won't agree with the people you're closest to but when it happens, what do you do? How does it make you feel? Do you maintain your relationship or choose to walk away? --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

It's easy to celebrate our own success but do you celebrate the progress and success of others? If you don't acknowledge and celebrate the amazing things that others are doing, why not? --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Do you enjoy being around your family members or do you dread it? If you dread it, why? Do you have family members that don't have vocal and emotional boundaries? Press play to learn more about these folks and see if you can identify. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Opportunities to get paid are everywhere but what about those unpaid opportunities? Are you only saying yes when there's money involved? --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Don't underestimate the power of good morning! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Have you ever had a colonic? I have and they are amazing. Press play to find out the benefits of colonics. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

Do you take yourself out on solo dates if not, why not? I do it all the time and it is one of my most enjoyable experiences listening and to find out why I love solo dates so much. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

We often hear about folks being canceled for racist and rude comments, poor conduct, and everything in between. What about canceling the people who we live with and depend on everyday? Are we measuring those closest to us with the same ruler that we use to measure people we only know through social media, the news, or in a work environment? What exemptions are we applying to canceling folks? Should anyone be exempt? Press play to hear my two-cents! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

What women think is sexy if often different from what men think is sexy. Who's right? Men or women? --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

How many times do we think we're comparing apples to apples, but we're really comparing houses to hotels? Find out why poor comparisons lead to poor results. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/misshandie/message

It's not only important for us to be honest with ourselves about our strengths, weaknesses and limitations, it's also important for us to give others an opportunity to do so.