Neurotic Tornado

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A podcast that explores relationships and all the beautiful messiness of being together.

Yuvi Zalkow & Jackie S Hollis


    • Jun 29, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 32m AVG DURATION
    • 39 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Neurotic Tornado

    45: The Failed Q&A Episode

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2022 26:52


    We attempt a Q&A episode with various fake questions that lead us into a conversation about gardening, narcissism, and self-discovery. This the last episode of the season!

    44: Stage Fright, Book Launches, and Other Nightmares

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 7, 2022 38:01


    With my new novel launching on June 7th, we discuss stage fright, the book launch experience, and my nightmares about peeing. We also give Jackie Shannon Hollis a call (17 minutes into the show). She hosted this show in seasons 2 & 3, and released a fabulous memoir in 2019: This Particular Happiness (link). If you want more info about the Neurotic Tornado

    43: The Depression and Anxiety Episode

    Play Episode Listen Later May 27, 2022 32:12


    We discuss my relationship to depression and anxiety over the years. Turns out that I used to date depression but now I'm hooking up with anxiety. So... yay??? To get more info about depression and anxiety: Tell Me All I Need to Know About Depression (Psycom.net link) Depression Definition and DSM-5 Diagnostic Criteria (Psycom.net link) How Can I Get Help for Depression? (Healthline.com link) Tell Me All I Need to Know About Anxiety (Psycom.net link) Do You Live with Anxiety? Here Are 11 Ways to Cope (Healthline.com link) If you want more info about the Neurotic Tornado

    42: Pain Scale from 1 to Fuchsia

    Play Episode Listen Later May 13, 2022 31:32


    I suffer from chronic migraines. Every week I have to work through the ups and downs of how I feel. In this episode, my wife and I talk about how we manage our lives alongside my chronic pain. For some context, here are two YouTube videos I made about chronic pain: The Pain in My Head: the story of my chronic headaches Writing Through Pain: how I remain a chronic creator even with chronic pain Also, in the episode we reference the Spoon Theory (coined by writer Christine Miserandino). To learn more about this helpful metaphor, check out her original blog post (from 2003!). If you want more info about the Neurotic Tornado

    41: Spiral of Foreboding

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 29, 2022 25:46


    We discuss my overactive sense of dread and foreboding, and why my sense of object permanence is only slightly better than a baby's. If you want more info about the Neurotic Tornado

    40: I'm My Obsession

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 17, 2022 39:22


    Welcome back to the podcast after a long hiatus! In this episode, my wife visits me up in the attic to talk about obsessive thinking, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), and why I'm capable of re-reading an already-sent email 87 times. Some related links: Measuring Obsessive-Compulsive Symptoms: Common Tools and Techniques (website) Obsessive Concerns Checklist (PDF) (fixed link) Compulsive Activities Checklist (PDF) If you want more info about the Neurotic Tornado

    The Catastrophizer

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 31, 2021 35:14


    So I brought my wife on the show again after a FOUR-year hiatus to check-in about... relationshippy things. And then I lost the episode for THREE years. And so now, after a SEVEN-year hiatus, my wife and I talk about our marriage, and her counseling, and my ability to catastrophize. To those of you who are heroically still subscribed, I hope you enjoy this one-off episode. ❤️️

    S3-38: Very much our space

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 5, 2016 23:57


    We conclude the Beyond Coupled season. We talk through what we learned. And we share an exciting update about Ben... We loved doing this season; we’re so appreciative that you joined us; we appreciate the honesty of the crew we interviewed; we’re even appreciative of the semicolon. But now we need to take a nap.

    S3-37: The beautiful messiness

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2016 21:28


    We dig a little more into the nature of their relationship. Some things we can immediately identify with, and some things we have to talk through...

    S3-36: Defining the relationship

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 6, 2016 23:42


    In this podcast episode, Nikki, Ben, and Stevan start to define their relationship now that everything is out in the open. If you're just tuning in, be sure to go back to episode 31 for the beginning of the season: It was a good marriage, but...

    S3-35: They go to therapy

    Play Episode Listen Later May 22, 2016 25:42


    We go with Nikki, Ben, and Stevan to therapy. This is the first therapy session with all of them at the table together. Find out what happens!......

    S3-34: An upended fishbowl

    Play Episode Listen Later May 9, 2016 26:56


    We finally check in with Ben (the husband!) to find out how he learned about his wife's affair, and how he began processing it. Whew. Heavy stuff....

    S3-33: Preparing the ground

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 24, 2016 25:52


    In this episode, we listen to Stevan and Nikki talk about their continuing affair. At this point, the affair is still a secret, but Nikki is preparing to tell her husband. I don't know about you, but I'm already starting to get chest pains...

    S3-32: How an affair begins

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 10, 2016 22:43


    In this episode, we meet Stevan. He is recently divorced when he meets Nikki, a married woman in a not-completely-happy marriage. Find out what happens next.

    S3-31: It was a good marriage, but…

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 27, 2016 27:55


    In this episode, we begin our quest into this season's relationship. Meet Nikki. She was mostly happy in her marriage, but there was one thing missing. Listen to the episode to find out what she was looking for...

    Season 3 Intro *** (S3-30)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 11, 2016 7:02


    Neurotic Tornado is (almost) back for season 3. In this ShOrT podcast episode, we tell you what's coming... and how we got to know the three people you're going to hear from...

    S2-29: Wisdom, Advice, Analysis

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 13, 2015 38:56


    We go back one last time to the four couples we interviewed to hear any wisdom, analysis, or advice they shared. We also rudely interrupt couples trying to eat at the Portland food carts to score any free advice. This is our last official episode of the season, but we may have some bonus episodes soon. And stay tuned for what is to come with season 3...

    S2-28: Gender Roles, Attraction, Sexuality

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 11, 2015 26:59


    Jackie and I explore the non-traditional gender roles for two of the couples we interviewed. And we question what the labels mean in the first place. We look at attraction in this light. And I think I confess my attraction for a brooding vampire... If you haven't already done so, check out the previous episodes from this season, which dealt with sex, conflict, and started with introductions. Fun for the whole family! Actually, not the whole family… just the adults.

    S2-27: The Sexpisode

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 28, 2015 49:46


    In this podcast episode (third in the Being Coupled season), Jackie & I... uhhh... actually... uhhh... try to talk about sex. With the couples we interviewed. And with our partners. But this stuff isn't easy. So we use a New York Times article about sex talk in therapy, along with a few other tools, to help navigate these sometimes-unsexy waters. After you listen to our conversation, check out the links below...

    S2-26: Communication & Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 13, 2015 64:34


    We dig into how the four couples we interviewed communicate with each other, and what arguments look like for them. We use research from the Gottman Institute as the basis for some of our ideas about relationships and the different personality types in a relationship. Except we simplify it down to 'avoider' types and 'prodder' types. Stick this episode in your ear for more info! No couples were injured during the making of this episode...

    S2-25: Meet the Couples

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 30, 2015 43:15


    Jackie and I introduce you to the four couples we interviewed for this season. We share with you how they met and what they consider their "mission" as a couple. We had a great time putting this series together and we're excited to finally get this thing into your... ears. So here we go, the first episode of the series...

    Season 2 Intro *** (S2-24)

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 17, 2015 15:35


    We go behind the scenes to explain what is coming in season two. Jackie Shannon Hollis and I interviewed four couples to prepare for this season. You'll hear why I'm doing it, why Jackie is doing it, and what my wife thinks about me podcast-cheating on her...

    S2-23: Writing About Loved Ones

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 6, 2014 65:10


    Jackie, Bill, and I discuss what it is like to write about the people we care about, and how it affects them. Jackie is currently working on a (second) memoir and I've written lots of autobiographical-sounding fiction (along with a few essays). So apparently we can easily BS about this subject for over an hour. (I edited it down to 65 minutes, though we spoke for longer!) It was again great to have Bill's perspective so he could chime in on how it felt to be written ABOUT, even in cases that weren't necessarily flattering. Give it a listen...

    S2-22: Alone Time with Jackie and Bill

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 23, 2014 48:02


    I talk to Jackie and Bill about a writer's need for alone time, and how that goes over with the writer's partner...

    21: The Podcast Effect

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 1, 2014 22:26


    This is the fifteenth podcast episode my wife and I have done together. So in this episode, we talk about how the podcast has affected our relationship. It has caused some ups and downs, with more ups than downs. We also talk about how you too can reap the benefits of this experience, without having to be foolish enough to start your own podcast to discuss your relationship issues...

    20: Hey Jealousy

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 14, 2014 32:36


    In this podcast episode, my wife and I talk about jealousy -- her jealousy of me and my jealousy of her. Although a certain amount of jealousy is allowed in our relationship, are we jealous enough???

    19: Drawn to Women

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 16, 2014 29:00


    In this podcast episode, my wife and I analyze why we both typically prefer to talk with women more than men. This isn't an across the board thing though -- we both have close male friends -- and so we try to untangle why it's that way. Hopefully no genders were harmed in the making of this podcast...

    18: Sex and Marriage

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 1, 2014 25:53


    In this podcast episode, my wife and I actually try to talk about our sex life -- or at least our struggle with getting sex into our busy lives. WARNING: This discussion is not so sexy...

    17: Resentment and You

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2014 31:28


    My wife and I talk about resentment. Or at least we try to talk about resentment -- a little bit of my resentment and a little bit of my wife's resentment. We bicker about our messy home. You'll also learn a brilliant (or horrifying) technique for saving time when folding (or not folding) your laundry...

    16: New Frontiers of Vulnerability

    Play Episode Listen Later May 26, 2014 37:34


    In this podcast episode, my wife and I discuss vulnerability, shame, and my own craziness. We talk about Brene Brown's research and we talk about the essay I recently published (His First Dress). Join us for this delightfully vulnerable romp.

    15: Neurotic Tour of the Vagina Tour

    Play Episode Listen Later May 12, 2014 27:27


    Yeah, you're just going to have to listen to this one to make sense of it. Sorry.

    14: Money Trouble

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2014 37:47


    My wife and I talk about money. Or more specifically, we talk about our money problems. Or more specifically, we talk about our relationship problems that relate to our money problems.

    13: Repair Attempts

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 13, 2014 29:01


    My wife and I discuss something known as a repair attempt. It is a term coined by John Gottman. He is a psychologist who has done 40 years of research on relationships and marital stability and divorce prediction. A repair attempt relates to the way a couple tries to reconnect after a fight. Find out how well (or poorly!) we do with our repair attempts...

    12: Marrying an Insecure Angsty Depressive

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 30, 2014 38:49


    I talk to my wife about what it is like to be married to an insecure, angst-ridden, depressed person. Is it as sexy as it sounds? I was particularly insecure and full of anxiety in the first few years of our relationship and we talk about how that impacted our relationship. Join us for this delightful romp!

    11: Marrying a Divorcée

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2014 34:29


    The wife and I discuss the impact of us getting together later in life, as a couple and as parents. Join us and let's get old together...

    10: Our Couples Counselors

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 10, 2014 43:33


    The wife and I take you on a tour of every one of our couples counselors. What could be more arousing than analyzing a whole bunch of analysts?

    9: Our Unromantic Romance

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 22, 2014 42:13


    My wife and I recorded this podcast episode on Valentine's Day after having NOT celebrated V-Day, so it seems fitting that we talk about how unromantic we are. Though we end up finding romance in our marriage in less typical places. I again try (and fail) to pick a fight with her. I again get us to talk about Buffy the Vampire Slayer, even when it is off topic. I again worry if you're enjoying this ride with us...

    8: Our Dark Periods

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 10, 2014 35:29


    I talk to my wife about our "dark period." Actually, she clarified for me that we have had several dark periods -- these are periods in our marriage where we have really struggled to connect, nearly to the point of it all falling apart. Not only do we talk about our dark periods, but we talk about my obsession about talking about our dark periods. And we talk about my (previous) fear of having kids. What's not to like?

    7: Never Good Enough

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 28, 2014 26:42


    I bully my wife onto the show. Listen to her talk about my various failings as a husband. Everything from my failures as a lawn mower-er to my inability to plan trips with the family to our combined attraction for Angel, the brooding vampire with a soul from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. What's not to like?

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