Perfectly Incapable

Whoa, we're back with a pride episode! Life has been a bit hectic, but we found time to sit down and chat about life, pride, and what it means to be an "ally". Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

We're not sure where this year has gone (or the world for that matter) but hi, hello, we're back! As we all know Halloween is cancelled this year, so we thought we'd sit and chat a bit instead. The topic was Halloween but we covered the scariest thing of all: 2020 (and how we've spent it). Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

If you've ever felt like you may be a little codependent, this episode is for you. Sometimes we joke about being needy or reliant on others, but actually being codependent on another person can be detrimental to your mental health. Poor communication, boundaries, and the need to be in control are just a few ways codependency can manifest, and Luis pretty much relates to them all. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Oh, you like to travel? Well we did an episode about it and we’re obviously both very qualified to give you travel tips. We cover the novice stress of booking, packing, TSA, and a little bit of plane etiquette. We also discuss traveling with friends and hooking-up on vacation. Also, Luis still doesn’t believe in credit cards and Adam still says it’s not a hobby. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

With so many hobbies and side-hustles in the world, wouldn’t it be great if you could combine a few of your favorites? Heads up, we’re getting nerdy in this one as we deep-dive into the world of live-streaming video games. We discuss what got us started, the pitfalls of Twitch, representation, and monetization. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

There's nothing wrong with a little self love (but toys are always fun with a partner too). From butt plugs to blow-up dolls, this episode is all about sex toys. Luis recaps his recent trip, Adam gives a PSA on poppers, and there's a bit of impromptu Amazon research. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Condragulations, you’ve made it to another round of Valentine’s Day. In this challenge you’ll be asked to justify your love of hand-holding, restaurant mounting, and general displays of public indecency. We’re diving into “Public Displays of Affection” in this episode, and the boys are ready to talk shit from the benches. At some point we get to charge admission, right? Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

It’s easy to tell our friends to be more body positive, but always harder to say it in front of the mirror. Social media can play a huge part, but what about the issues that developed as we grew up? From locker rooms and gay twitter, to eating disorders and body dysmorphia, we’re covering the many body image issues we’ve faced and how they’ve evolved over time. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Our lives are full of things that amp up our stress and anxiety levels, so why wouldn’t we want to remove some of those things if we can? Sunday Scaries are real, coming down from a weekend of binge drinking with the impending weight of the work week just around the corner, and a pile of to-do’s we neglected all weekend doesn’t make us any less stressed. In this one we’re talking about some of our own mental hangups, some of the ways we’re trying to address our own mental health, and a few of those anxieties we could probably remove today. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Sometimes we have to take control of what we can and just hit the reset button. Starting a new job, moving to a new city, or simply purging some old clothes can help us feel like we’re getting a new start. But what comes along with starting over? In this episode we discuss moving to new cities, making new friends, apartment hunting, and the dreaded aspects of having to physically move your life. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

It's a new year, a new decade, and...we're still trying to get it together. When we're trying to do everything sometimes we end up with the paralysis of choice. How do you choose what's most important or where to begin? In order to cross things off our lists we have to pick our priorities and where to put our time. We have to start somewhere, so how do we choose? Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

There’s a line between having a hobby or being a collector and just flat out hoarding. It’s not a fine line, but it’s a pretty slippery slope if you have an addictive personality. From beanie babies to mounds of old newspapers, collections can quickly get out of control and affect your relationships, personal space, financial standings and even your mental health. We’re discussing some of our own obsessions today, why artists make great hoarders, and some ways to try and keep yourself from plummeting into the danger zone. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

It's Gay Christmas again! Halloween is our favorite time of year (although it's apparently not everyone's) and we're diving into our favorite spooky season. From costumes and parties to some of our favorite pop culture killers, light a candle and join us for another Halloween episode! --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

We’re probably all familiar with the classic “opposites attract” trope (Ross and Rachel, Cordelia and Xander) but what really makes our opposites appealing? Is it the constant push and pull or the passionate make ups? Is there longevity in the tension or are they just meant to fizzle out? Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

As much as we try, nobody’s perfect. At some point or another we all fuckup, but how easy is it to admit when you’ve made a mistake? We’re discussing how we handle our own personal errors, as well as when those around us are anything less than perfect. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

IT'S OUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY! Neither Adam or Luis have made it to one year in their endeavors, so they're taking some time to reflect on the past year and see if they can find any areas of growth. Good luck, right? They discuss some of their favorite topics, if any of their views have changed, what they'd like to see in the future, and potentially even compliment one another (gasp). Grab your favorite hard seltzer, sit back and reflect with the boys! Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Ever thought about your biggest fear? How about the first time you felt afraid? With spooky season just around the corner, today we're talking about FEAR and some of the ways it manifests. What causes fear? Are there actually any "irrational fears"? We throw in a little research and science paired with personal experiences to discuss the different types of fear and where they come from. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @perfectlyincapablepodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Having a social media presence today is basically a requirement and can literally be your money maker. Over the last year we’ve seen content creators and celebrities open up about mental health, and the burnout that comes with feeling like you have to always “be on” for the public. From the fear of falling behind to errand fatigue, we’re discussing some of the ways Millennials and Gen-Z are suffering from burnout faster than we probably should be. Paired with this episode, Adam discusses taking a few weeks off (relatable content?) Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Has a partner ever left you alone in their room and the urge to snoop won? If you're like Adam you're probably just waiting for them to leave. Today we're talking about privacy and some of the ways it's changed over the years. From parent's open-door rules to going through a partner's phone (they may have also went on a rant about cell phones for a while). Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

It’s easy to say we’re good at compromising until we’re in the middle of Whole Foods fighting over what brand of toilet paper to buy. Sometimes a decision as simple as where to eat can turn into one of those huge “nothing fights” (life hack: just order from multiple restaurants and have a buffet). The boys discuss how and when to compromise in this one, how good they are at it, and some of the times it’s easier said than done. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Why do we stay hooked on some past relationships instead of others? Is it possible some always have a chance of rekindling or are we just getting in our own way? Not all of us can shut our emotions down at the drop of a hat, but is that really a bad thing? It’s probably easier to throw an ex in the garbage if they burn your house down, but today we’re covering those relationships that had a slightly less traumatic ending. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Would You Rather: date a liar or date someone that’s immature? We probably all have different answers, but when it comes to a relationship emotional maturity plays a pretty big role. It also ties closely with emotional intelligence, and when your SO is lacking you’re in for a bumpy ride. In this one we’re discussing things like constructive criticism versus a personal attack, recognizing our own emotions, and blaming your zodiac sign for your shortcomings. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

So you've decided to move in together...now what? Do you get a new place, or move in with them? Whose furniture do we use? Is there enough closet space? And what happens the first time you brush your teeth together?! A lot of things can change when you combine your living space with an SO, and even more so when you start mixing finances. We've probably all had those "nothing fights" but could they all just be avoided by getting all of your shit out in the open? "Straight Correspondent" Paloma joins us again for this one, discussing when to move in and how to make it work! Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Is there really such a thing as a “white lie” or do they always snowball into more? Are we lying to kids about Santa Clause or is that just fun make-believe? We’re talking about lying in this one, from calling in sick to those notorious “I’m on my way!” texts we’ve all pulled. Even lying to ourselves can walk a thin line between faking it till we make it and just being flat out delusional. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

What makes "bad boys" seem so appealing? Is it their mysterious, alluring, sociopath behavior? Or just our need to fix them? We're discussing the attraction to the brooding and emotionally unavailable in this one, from leather jackets and jukebox machines to black ties and blackmail. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram and Facebook @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Sometimes we have relationships that are going just a little too well, so we start looking for things that "might" become an issue or inventing problems that aren't even there. What if he cheats on me? What if she gets bored? If their parents don't like me are we even going to work? Manufacturing issues can be another defense mechanism when we're feeling insecure and all we end up doing is sabotaging the whole thing. But hey, if we can get our partner to end it first we never have to deal with it, right? We're discussing ways we sabotage our relationships in this one, so sit back and get ready to overthink! Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast and Twitter @PerfinPodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Why do we compare ourselves to our friends or to what we see on the socials? We can have standards or deal breakers but are we choosing the wrong way to measure success? We're covering the standards we set in our lives in this one, from work to relationships, and if we’re screwing ourselves out of success by trying to measure it against the world. Adam's currently obsessed with the book, "The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck" by Mark Manson so they've wrapped a topic around it. Do you actually need two texts an hour or do you value the “goodnight” texts more? Do you need your boss’s pat on the back or just the raise? Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Are straight guys actually the worst when it comes to dating? Are dates the best way to explore a new city? We're diving into the world of hetero dating in this one, with special guest host Paloma! Luis was taking care of family business last week, so Paloma is filling in because Adam's afraid of dead air. We talk about the apps, worst dates, what it's like to actually have a compatible partner, and Paloma's work with the AFSP (The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention). Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

When is being too available detrimental to your relationship? Playing "Hard to Get" can be a fun, innocent game early on but sometimes we just want to spend all of our time with the object of our affection. Are the triple texts endearing or overwhelming? Sometimes plans get cancelled, but how many times can you keep accepting a reschedule? It's just another balancing act in the circus of dating, and we're covering a few of the ways you might be making yourself too available. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

If you're swiped out and sick of the apps, what other options are there? Can you even meet someone in the wild anymore or are we stuck sliding into each other's DM's? This episode is all about meeting outside of digital screens. We cover ways to approach, preferred follow ups, and even some places to go when you're on the prowl. (Also, have you guys checked out Podcoin?) Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Casual sex can be fun and all, but is it better when you meet in the wild or pull out the apps “Uber Eats” style? Should you repeat tricks or are hookups best when they’re one and done? Hooking up isn’t for everyone, and today we’re sharing some of our best and worst. Find out why the stars have to align for Adam to even consider it, and why it’s best never to fall asleep around Luis. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

What’s worse, looking jealous or crazy? This one’s all about cheating and infidelity (escandalo!) Why do we cheat on our partners, and is there coming back from it? Once a cheater, always a cheater? And what’s worse, emotional or physical cheating? You’ll probably want to go ahead and queue up Lemonade after this one. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Ever just like, found yourself in a shiny new relationship and you’re just like, so happy, and you both just like, get along so well, and you hang out and everything’s sooo great and nothing's crazy and it’s already been like—shit, we’ve been together for how many years? Sometimes we find someone we click with and things are cool but...would we really miss anything but the warm body lying next to us? We’re diving into the pitfalls of complacency in this one, how it’s easy to misinterpret comfort for success, and if there’s any coming back from it. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Dating can be challenging enough, but add a few extra miles of distance and it can go downhill fast. Adam barely dates outside of his neighborhood, so he's quizzing Luis on a relationship that wasn't only states apart, but started long distance. What are some of the pitfalls? And can you make it work without trust? Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

From leather fantasies to becoming "one with nature" today's episode is all about kinks and fetishes. There's a lot of misconceptions about the two, where they overlap, and how they're actually not interchangeable terms. We had a ton of fun with this one, not only educating ourselves but also realizing some of our own personal interests as well. Luis shares a long-overdue story and Adam finds out he may not be as vanilla as he originally thought. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

PORNOGRAPHY. May as well start off strong, right? It can seem a bit taboo to talk about, especially with a partner, but chances are you both indulge from time to time. From sneaking late night Pay-Per-Views to setting unrealistic expectations, we’re discussing all the different ways porn can affect our lives. Luis apparently knows a lot of actors by name, and Adam is traumatized by his own home videos. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

If two's company is three a crowd or a party? The queer community often encourages defining your own relationship against the traditional standards of society, but how do you know if opening your relationship is the right move? What kind of rules should you put in place, and can they end up causing problems in the long run? We brought in a third for this one, our friend Jerrad, to share his experiences and advice on being “monogamish”. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

The thing we all need and never seem to have enough of — let's talk about money. From first dates to borrowing from friends, money can leave us care-free or tear a relationship apart. In any scenario, queer people are often at a disadvantage. Luis learned to hustle at a young age and Adam always manage to overpay, plus they share a few money saving tips. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Have you ever met someone and thought, “are they confident or just a dick?” There’s a line between confidence and cockiness, and it’s easy to teeter between the two. In this episode we discuss a bit of misguided confidence and struggles with humility. Adam recaps confronting a cheating ex that failed miserably and Luis shares advice on how to redirect awful coworkers. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Feeling like you’re hiding a part of yourself can feel like a literal weight on your shoulders and make coming out to coworkers a bit daunting, even in the most comfortable environments. Today we’re talking about being out in the workplace and all the layers that it entails. Also, Luis is apparently becoming fluent in Kardashian. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Who doesn’t love a heated celebrity feud on Twitter? THE CLAPBACKS! The world seems to love watching the rich & famous drag each other through the mud, but when it happens in everyday life it’s exhausting. Following up the episode about apologies, we dive into some of the issues with those long term fights with friends and lovers alike. Luis changes Adam’s contact name in his phone (for reasons) and Adam tries to put the shovel down (again). Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Admitting you're wrong can be a hard pill to swallow, and sometimes damn near impossible. When nobody accepts the blame what’s wrong with just agreeing to disagree? We’re talking about apologies in this one, the pros in owning up to mistakes, and the cons of it just becoming a habit. It can be easier to say “I’m sorry” to end an argument but who really wins? And is there even a point in saying “sorry you feel that way”?! Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

It’s our favorite day of disappointment, and who doesn't love a little VD? It's easy to be jaded on Valentine’s Day when your timeline is full of romantic intentions and sponsored posts shoving flowers down your throat, but remember when it was fun? Before reservations and expectations we were just kids with candy and cards of our favorite cartoons. At least now we can buy all the discounted chocolate we want (and wash it down with a nice Merlot). Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

It can be easier to ask for forgiveness instead of permission, but not everyone is so quick to forgive (and sometimes it takes an entire album about you and Becky with the good hair). But even if honesty is the best policy, is it really lying if they never find out? And what if those pants actually DO make them look fat? Sometimes, it's best to just keep your mouth closed. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Some of the greatest scandals in the world have all been driven by the same destructive emotion: jealousy. If you’re a human in the world, chances are you’ve experienced some form of jealousy in your life and today we’re discussing all the different ways it can seep in and amplify our insecurities and doubts. If you’re finding yourself five pages deep in a partner’s inbox while hiding in a bush outside of their office it may be time to take a step back and ask, “WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING?!” Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

We all know someone that shares a little too much on Facebook, or goes out of their way to send a very pointed tweet when they’re feeling entitled. It’s human nature to crave attention, and there’s plenty of social platforms today to do whatever you can to get it! The boys have both been #sickaf, so today’s episode is short but sweet as they talk about all the different ways we try and get attention. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

Grab a cocktail (or if you’re at work sneak some Baileys into your coffee) and get ready to dive into Adam’s favorite topic: BOOZE. Today we’re sharing some of our favorite drinks, the ones that have ruined our lives, and a medical condition that actually sounds kind of fun. Lessons learned: Luis actually drinks more than he lets on and don’t trust Adam to tend bar. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

We know when we’re not getting the credit we deserve or the attention we need, so why do we insist on settling for less? Following up on last episode’s topic, Fear of Failure and Rejection, we’re tackling some of the situations where we often find ourselves accepting scraps instead of demanding what we really want. Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

We’re saying goodbye to 2018, and ringing in the new year with a fresh batch of insecurities. Why do we set unrealistic resolutions and goals just to beat ourselves up for not reaching them? The fear of failure can be crippling to the point that we just say fuck it and pop open another bottle of wine, but we’ve got a few suggestions on how you can start checking off those lists. We also recap our holidays and wrap up the year with some of our top songs of 2018. Happy New Year! Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

The holidays are full of anxiety, family time we didn’t ask for, and financial obligations we’ll probably never get out of, but it’s the season of giving right?! We have a guest with us today as we talk all about family gatherings, obligations to significant others, and wrap up the episode quizzing each other about holiday lyrics. Merry Chrysler! Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support

First dates can leave you hearing wedding bells in the distance or f*cking crash and burn making you question your own sanity while looking for the hidden cameras. Whether meeting on the apps or in the wild, it all comes down to setting up that first date, which is enough to send some of us into an anxiety fueled state of panic. From pre-gaming happy hour to horrifying hobbies, sometimes you’ve just got to fake a dismemberment and bail. If they were all winners we’d all be married, right? Follow Perfectly Incapable on Instagram @PerfectlyIncapablePodcast. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/perfectlyincapable/support