SensitiveSluts yearn for intimacy — both sexual adventure and lifetime partnerships. But we SensitiveSluts have such big hearts and deep passion that we feel desperate when we don't get what we desire. Worse, SensitiveSluts despair when a date or relationship doesn't pan out. Enter trauma-informed dating coach Miriam Diana! She has the practical tools to help you move through your pain, toward a vibrant love life. Tune in for advice related to attachment theory, as well as healing practices like self-cuddle meditations, sexmagic rituals, aspecting, and parts work/Internal Family Systems (IFS).
Red flags in sports are thrown when a player behaves badly. Red flags in dating are known as indicators of someone who is bad for you. How do you know when a red flag arises? On a date, you know you've encountered a red flag if you have any of these somatic markers: your stomach turns, you freeze up, or you feel uncomfortable yet pressured to play it cool. The following may be red flags that indicate your date is avoidant of attachment: You reveal something about yourself, and they ignore it You can't tell if they like youYou have to work to keep them interestedTheir recent dating experiences are focused on uncommitted, casual sexIf you're looking for a committed relationship and you encounter these things — and along with them you feel ill-at-ease — then these are red flags that this person won't be available for a relationship. However, red flags in dating are not some long list of no-no's that you keep in your head. Conscious dating is about getting OUT of your head! Besides, people can have all sorts of lists in their heads for things they SHOULD do that they don't listen to. Red flags are often ignored because they come in a sexy package. The only way to see red flags and get yourself to turn the other way when you see them is to listen to yourself. Note how you feel with your best friend, or how you felt when you met someone who later became a good friend. Go for that feeling of ease! That's the best way to avoid the feeling of, “Dang, I should have heeded those red flags.”Still: We all miss red flags. And we all see red flags but choose to ignore them. Beating yourself up is never helpful. Give yourself a break, and just try to cultivate safety next time. The goal is to keep feeling good, or at least neutral — as opposed to an up-up and down-down-crash roller coaster!
*** EVENT INFO: tinyurl.com/yoga4dating *** In this episode, certified conscious dating coach Miriam Diana shares what yoga therapy is, how it's different from a yoga class, and how it can help you feel centered in yourself while dating. (For SensitiveSluts, it's about authentically balancing your sensitive and slutty sides.) Then, yoga therapy apprentice Brooke Pierson provides a deep dive into yoga therapy and her fascinating story of going from the military and law enforcement world to the yoga and healing world. Listen until the end for a 10-minute yoga therapy meditation to help you connect with your heart!
In this episode, certified conscious dating coach Miriam Diana discusses how to use yoga therapy to balance your sensitive and slutty sides. It's all about getting centered! Plus, yoga therapy apprentice Brooke Pierson shares her fascinating story of going from police officer to yoga therapist. Brooke also provides a 10-minute yoga therapy exercise to connect you with your heart.
Guides to manifesting the person of your dreams — as espoused in The Law of Attraction and “The Secret” — can be eye-rollingly simple and shaming if you take them too seriously. In this podcast, certified conscious dating coach Miriam Diana breaks down what's actually helpful in the arena of mental imagery. She also takes you through a 10-minute visualization and embodiment exercise to help you feel the friendship and love that's here for the taking — the connection you already have, and the connection you can develop. If you want more of this, check out Miriam Diana's events at miriamdiana.com/events. They include a Post-Breakup Support Group in April 2024.
Certified Sex, Love & Relationship Coach Miriam Diana shares ways to comfort your broken heart after a breakup — whether you're the one who broke things off, or someone broke up with you. What do you do with yourself after a breakup? And what should you do if you can't get over a breakup from a long time ago? One word: dance. Dance with your feelings — but be the leader. Here's how.
Freaking out before a date? Pick up this toolkit! After a story*, you'll hear a transformative visualization exercise that will calm the stressed-out part of you and EMPOWER your inner queen/king/nonbinary sovereign. This practice will help you feel grounded in your dignity. That means you can take a deep sense of peace and confidence to your date, showing up with your natural vibrancy and magnetism. *Before the guided imagery practice, conscious dating coach Miriam Diana will share a bad date story! Although the date ended awkwardly, it shows Miriam Diana's approach to dating: to see dating as life's biggest self-love challenge. If you like this meditation, be sure to listen to "Pre-Date Emergency Toolkit (Part #1): 3 tools to Nix Nervousness and Boost Confidence" (sptfy.com/LZYu). More on the self-love philosophy to dating: Swiping on dating apps and going out with people brings a lot of mishegoss (that's Yiddish for wacky sh*t!). If you can see any challenge that comes your way as an opportunity to choose to love yourself — to choose the thing that lands in love — then you're doing it right. Seeing dating as an educational obstacle course that teaches you how to be compassionate to yourself will help you set better boundaries AND enjoy dating. Plus, it will help you have compassion for the people you're dating when they're actin' a fool (and not take it personally). ♡ ♡ ♡ Miriam Diana is a trauma-informed, love-life coach. She helps people of all genders use their imagination and their gut feelings to have more fulfilling love lives. ♡ ♡ ♡ Are you looking for growth in the areas of sex, sexual expression, love, dating, and relationships? Go to https://miriamdiana.com!
About to go on a date and freaking out? Quick, pick up this toolkit! It's got 3 tools: (1) INTROSPECTION, (2) CONNECTION, and (3) DISTRACTION. With these tools, you can free yourself of the suffering of pre-date anxiety. Specifically, these tools help you find peace before the date, build up your self-esteem, and remember why you're going on the date to begin with. INTROSPECTION with yourself, CONNECTION with friends, and DISTRACTION with your interests all shift your focus to what you are looking for (instead of what your date might think of you). After you listen to this episode, hop over to the next one: "Pre-Date Emergency Toolkit (Part #2): "Put on Your Crown" — Guided Meditation". ♡ ♡ ♡ Miriam Diana is a trauma-informed, conscious dating coach. She helps people of all genders use their imagination and their gut feelings to have more fulfilling love lives. ♡ ♡ ♡ Are you looking for growth in the areas of sex, sexual expression, love, dating, and relationships? Go to https://miriamdiana.com
What is nonmonogamy? Trauma-informed relationship coach Miriam Diana will tell you what you need to know! In this episode: Miriam Diana references the nonmonogamy bible: "The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love." The authors of "The Ethical Slut" are sex educator and writer Janet W. Hardy and marriage and family therapist Dossie Easton. The very first edition of "The Ethical Slut" came out in 1994 when Dossie Easton was 50 years old; the first mass-produced edition was published in 1997 when she was 54. Miriam Diana shares her personal experiences with open relationships and monogamishamy. Shout out to Dan Savage for the term "monogamish"! At minute 28:00, Miriam Diana leads a relaxation exercise to connect your heart to your sexy parts, as well as a visualization meditation to help you feel into what type of relationship structure works best for you. Do you feel best when you're in a monogamous relationship container? Or do you feel most happy and peaceful with multiple partners and/or lovers? This practice will help you imagine what each experience would be like. Ask a question for the podcast at tinyurl.com/sensitiveslutquestions. Learn more about Miriam Diana and her coaching at facebook.com/miriamdianacoaching.
Attachment Theory teaches us that humans are born with a need to form a close emotional bond with a caregiver. Our survival depends on bonding and belonging. When psychologists describe Attachment Theory today, they often explain that the type of bond you had with your caregivers when you were an infant strongly affects how you bond to people in intimate relationships as an adult. In fact, attachment theorists say that people tend to bond with sexual/romantic partners in 4 main ways: securely, anxiously, avoidantly, or chaotically (disorganized). In this episode, trauma-informed dating coach Miriam Diana does a deep dive on the 4 main attachment styles, with a focus on anxiously attached folx. Anxious attachers tend to desire intense intimacy, reassurance, and love — but they're prone to worry about their dating life and the people they're dating. And if you're an anxiously attached SensitiveSlut, watch out! Dating can feel like being pushed and pulled in different directions. What's the solution? You can start by calming your nervous system with a guided meditation, which Miriam Diana provides in the latter half of the show. This exercise is great for people with any type of attachment style because it gives you a taste of how it might feel to have exactly what you desire in your love life. For the exercise, you will use your imagination and connect to your “felt sense” (how your emotions feel physically). Miriam Diana will guide you to visualize a secure attachment with someone safe — who also turns you on. Want to connect with Miriam Diana? Ask a question at tinyurl.com/sensitiveslutquestions and she will share her advice on the podcast! You can also inquire about coaching on Facebook — just search for “Miriam Diana Coaching.”
What is a “Slut”? Etymology lesson: The word "slut" is likely derived from the archaic German Schlutt meaning "slovenly woman. Slovenly has that same “slo” sound, means carelessly dirty — not dirty in the sexual sense, just in the untidy sense. Schlutt, slovenly, and slut all have that "slu" sound — similar to the following ooey-gooey, drippy mushy words: slug, slush, slurp, sludge, slop. The word "slut" also has the same initial sound as messy words like slob and slum. Perhaps, our current use of the word "slut" is related to the idea of a WAP — a moist, sexually receptive vagina. In the 1300, the Canterbury Tales used “slut” to refer to a disheveled man. In the 1400s, some written works used the word “slut” for kitchen maids. And through to the 1700s, “slut” meant a LOT of different things, from a female dog to a candle made out of a rag dipped in lard. Mainly during that period, it was the female version of the word “scamp." Where a scamp is a mischievous boy, a slut was a girl who's messy or a woman who doesn't keep her house tidy — and doesn't care. By the 1900s, the current meaning was cemented: a lowly, immoral woman who has too much sex — the kind of woman who just "gives it away" without any respect for herself; a woman who deserves to be judged and feel shame. As a SensitiveSlut, Miriam Diana says: screw that! Why people should be sensitive about the word "slut" Using the word "slut" as an epithet is one of patriarchy's worst language-based weapons against women and girls. Sex should not be something shameful — we all come from sex. And the bodies of people who have vaginas should not be shamed — every one of us came from a body with a uterus, likely a woman's body. The concept of a "slut" is filled with hypocrisy, and is worthy of sacred rage. Women are expected to seem sexually receptive, but not to actually accept sex unless it is under the few situations proscribed by even more powerful men in society (such as religious leaders). Reclaiming the word "slut" The SlutWalk is a global movement calling for an end to rape culture, slut shaming, and blaming sexual assault survivors. The rallies started in 2011 in Canada after a Toronto cop said "women should avoid dressing like sluts" to avoid rape. Women of color, particularly Black women, can have a different relationship with the word "slut" and the ability to go on SlutWalk marches than white women. One way this difference shows up: white women can enjoy more safety on a SlutWalk than women of color. Reclaiming the word "slut" is complicated. When Miriam Diana uses the word "slut," she is taking the power out of the word and feeling her inherent self-respect. Feeling into your sacred rage AND your pleasure. At the end of the episode, Miriam Diana leads you in a Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR). This exercise releases tension and connects you to feeling good in your body.
Are you someone who seeks out adventure and new experiences, but also can get easily overwhelmed? You might be a high sensation seeking (HSS) highly sensitive person (HSP)! Trauma-informed dating coach Miriam Diana is too. Her sensitive side has helped her form deep, loving bonds with her friends and key romantic partners. And her slutty side has helped her have mind-blowing, life-affirming, pleasurable experiences! But feeling these two sides so intensely has also led to conflict and confusion. In this episode, Miriam Diana shares how to befriend these two sides of yourself, and help them to work together instead of battling each other. In the end, both your sensitive side and your slutty side just want you to live the best life possible! Learn more about the high sensation seeking (HSS) highly sensitive person (HSP) personality traits at Elaine Aron's website, https://hsperson.com. Record a question for the show! Go to tinyurl.com/sensitiveslutquestions. Miriam Diana will play it and answer it on the next episode. Want to join Miriam Diana's sensitive slut community, or learn about her coaching in conscious dating? Go to facebook.com/miriamdianacoaching.
This podcast is for anyone who is tender-hearted, yet yearns for sexual adventure and fulfillment. Are you ready to embrace the parts of you that are exuberantly sexual — and sweetly sensitive? Listen all the way through to feel your power and learn how o show up as your best self in your love life! In this episode, trauma-informed Dating coach Miriam Diana explains how to heal from slut shaming and sooth the part of your mind that worries about what other people think of you. In the latter half of the episode, Miriam Diana guides you into parts work, with a meditation aimed at helping you meet the parts of you who are causing conflicts in your love life. With traditional therapy, your competing desires and conflicting motivations can be seen as a problem — as if all of you should want one thing only. With parts work, we assume that you have different parts or "sub-personalities" who just need to be heard. This meditation helps you give your conflicting parts what they need so they stop pushing you around in different directions. It's also great for anyone who deals with obsessive thinking about their romantic partners or rumination about an ex. Learn more at Facebook.com/miriamdianacoaching.
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