The Dadhood Journey

On today's episode, I sit down with my my friend and colleague, Jason Frishman, to talk about parenting, being the best man we can be (as well as being the best father) and Star Wars. -Why it's so challenging for us to see our kids as they ARE rather than how WE want them to be --How Joseph Campbell and The Hero's Journey has left the modern man feeling like if he isn't out slaying dragons, then his life is boring or useless ---A 3 step process to get Present in any moment that will allow you to be a better dad, a better spouse, a better person.    Sign up for updates: www.TheDadhoodJourney.com Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren

It's been a long time since I've published an episode of TDJ and here are the updates on what's going on at The Dadhood Journey (upcoming episodes and guests, how to join the FB group, meet-ups locally and virtually, courses, etc.) and what more is to come in the next few months... Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren

Have you ever caught your son looking at you with pride in his eyes? It's the best. I got one of those looks this weekend when I pulled out my guitar and played in front of his friends. It was a song we both loved and he was surprised I'd learned it. He was so proud of me he recorded it on his iPad. Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarrenLearn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

The Dude's House had its first dinner party! Some of my oldest friends came over and I cooked for them. I wanted to use the opportunity to have a teaching moment with Niko about how to be a great host. He did his part, pitched in, and I think he learned some lessons he'll never forget.  Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarrenLearn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

This weekend I witnessed first hand, the benefits of young kids playing with older ones. It's fun but also so great developmentally and expansively. The older kids Niko was hanging out with were great with him, and the experience built up his confidence and expanded his expectations of himself and what he's capable of.   Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood  Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group  Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

This week at school, Niko's class is having “Invention Week.” The students are asked to come up with an invention, figure out how to build it, and present it to the class. I'm going to be honest and say that watching my kid build this project has me fighting the instinct to just take over and do it for him. Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarrenLearn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I've been travelling a lot lately, and absolutely loving it. Thankfully, now that Niko is a little older, he's been able to come with me which is fantastic, but also really highlighted the necessity of making sure that traveling kids are travel savvy. If you have kids and love to travel, this one's for you. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren  Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

This one's for the moms! Our last episode was asking dads to share their experiences as new fathers, and now I'm wondering if you could pass this episode along to the moms in your lives for the same reason. If you could find the time to answer a few questions, it would really help out! Listen in for more details. Thank you!   Questionnaires: www.drjaywarren.com/MomsHelpingDads www.drjaywarren.com/DadsHelpingDads   Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I am working on some projects aimed at helping new dads, and I've created a questionnaire, looking for any advice experienced dads may have given their pre-dad selves. If you could find the time to answer a few questions, it would really help out! Listen in for more details.Thanks!   Questionnaires:  www.drjaywarren.com/DadsHelpingDads www.drjaywarren.com/MomsHelpingDads   Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

As you're listening to this episode, Niko and I will be living it up in Kauai! This trip symbolizes more than just fun and relaxation, it also represents a milestone in the relationship between Niko's mother and I. It took some work, but she has agreed to allow me to take him, and today's episode is about standing your ground for what you know is right. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

It's Niko's birthday! The purpose of this podcast is to (hopefully) be useful, inspiring and comforting to other dads out there, but it's also a bit of a journal for me. So today, I wanted to use this platform to send a great big birthday wish to my SIX-YEAR-OLD son! Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I had my first parent/teacher conference and it went great. I took the time to prepare for it by asking a couple of family friends (both with PhDs in Childhood Education) and wanted to share their insights to help you prepare for you next parent/teacher conference. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

How do you handle dishonesty with your kids? Niko has been testing his boundaries in terms of how far he can stretch the truth, and on this episode I wanted to share some strategies I've been using that have resulted in some progress. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Trying to understand your 5-year-old's emotions can be tricky. I want to make sure that he's telling me what he's feeling, and not putting my own filter on it, so we have introduced a new medium for Niko to communicate his feelings with us, by asking him to draw them. Find out how it's working at drjaywarren.com/113 Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Niko started Kindergarten this year, and he has been learning a lot in the academic field which is awesome, but he's also been learning a ton about life - and that's been hard. Between the long days, teasing and figuring out what to do in these new situations, we are figuring out how to help him through the transition. Listen in to find out how it's going at drjaywarren.com/112 Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Niko has a famous penpal - the BFG. The BFG stands for Big Friendly Giant, and he is the central character in the Rold Dahl book of the same name. In the book, the BFG delivers dreams to children every night. After reading the book together, Niko had some lingering questions, so we decided to go straight to the source and ask the BFG himself in a series of notes.  Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

It is actually a very common experience for dad's not to feel as bonded to their babies as they think they should be or want to be. Most dads going through this, often feel like there's something wrong with them, but that's not true. This episode is about a whole lot of empathy, and a whole lot of hope.   Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I've been throwing this idea around for a while in my practice, and it has finally come to be! In my work at CAP Wellness Centre I noticed a lot of our specialized postnatal groups became general support groups for moms, and noticed a gap for dads. Tune in to hear how it's going.   Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Niko received an early birthday gift - a book called What Should Danny Do? It is so great for kids and for parents. It's a choose your own adventure book focused on honing his superpower which is “the power to choose”. It's a great way for kids to start to understand the consequences of choices. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Wednesday's are Dad and Niko days, which Niko and I have affectionately named Adventure Days. THIS Wednesday, Niko has joined me as co-host for a little Q&A. Do you have adventure days with your kids? Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

While driving with Niko in the car today, he turned to me and said, “Dad, I just love this car. I hope you have this car forever!” It's not a super fancy car, but I agreed and added that the only people who are ever really in that car, are him and I. As I said it, it dawned on me that it's really just him and I, which is cool, but it was also kind of sad.   Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

After dropping Niko off at his moms, it struck me how different my house is when Niko is in it, and when he's not. Physically speaking, his toys, crafting supplies and general kid “mess” brings so much color into my home, and it dawned on me how that brightness and fun is such a reflection of the feelings Niko brings into my life.    Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I was 41 when Niko was born, and that made me a little hesitant to have more kids. Because Niko is an only child, his mother and I are often asked why Niko doesn't have “another sibling to play with?” It's a common question for parents of only children. Tune in to hear my answer.   Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Niko has really been into putting on skits lately, and recently I was invited to his Super Famous Garbage Truck Show at his mom's house. At the last second, Niko decided he was too nervous to go on. This gave me a great opportunity to pass on a tale of nervousness that my father told me as a kid. Tune in to find out why it's so important to relate to your kids.   Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

This morning, Niko left for a two-week trip with his mom. This is the longest I've ever been away from him, and the first trip he's taken since his mom and I have separated. I've got some mixed feelings (and mixed feelings about having mixed feelings), but acceptance will help me to take advantage of the time I have alone. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

We are 100 episodes into the Dadhood Journey Podcast! Sharing my stories on the podcast has deepened my personal learning, and I am so grateful that I've been able to share my Dadhood Journey with you. I hope I've been able to bring some support and laughs to your Dadhood Journey, and on this episode, I'll catch you up with what's been going on. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I have been LOVING the Orange Theory Workouts. It's a varied, total body workout, that makes working out easy. I've found that the mental and physical benefits of working out effectively, have made me a much better dad in some surprising ways. We're talking about training for Dadhood on the podcast today. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

If you've ever lost track of your child, even for a split second, you know the instant panic that takes hold of your whole body. What you may not know however, is that you're not alone, and it happens to a lot of parents all the time. That's what we're talking about today on the podcast. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Something different today Dads - an interview with the author of my favorite book on fatherhood! Guest: Michael Byron Smith is the author of “The Power of Dadhood: How to Become the Father Your Child Needs”. He has dedicated himself to “Helping Fathers to be Dads”, the name of his Dadhood blog. In this episode, we will cover: The real difference between being a father and being a Dad. The 7 Characteristics of a Successful Dad and what it takes to become better at each one. The “Dad's Self Inspection Checklist”, created out of Mike experience of being an USAF Colonel and how to use it to regularly take an inventory of how you're doing as a dad and where you can improve. Resources mentioned in the conversation: The Power of Dadhood book on Amazon His website: https://michaelbyronsmith.com/index.html Dr. Jay's article on The Transition to Fatherhood: https://drjaywarren.com/the-transition-to-dadhood/ Dr. Jay's other podcast: Healthy Births, Happy Babies   About Michael Byron Smith: Michael Byron Smith is an advocate for healthy families with an emphasis on fathering. He is a 69-year-old father of three and grandfather to four, a retired USAF Colonel and a former B-52 pilot. Michael is the oldest of a family of six that struggled. His alcoholic father was irresponsible in his role as a parent. The impact this had on Mike's siblings, and two generations after that motivated him to be the best father he could be. Michael broke the cycle of dysfunctional families by earning a college scholarship and joining Air Force ROTC. After retirement, he dedicated himself to “Helping Fathers to be Dads”, the name of his Dadhood blog. He is also the author of “The Power of Dadhood: How to Become the Father Your Child Needs”.

It was a year ago today that I launched The Dadhood Journey podcast. It's been A WHILE since I've posted anything new and today is kind of a "re-boot". Happy Father's Day again, brothers! What are you doing today? A Star Wards Nerf gun fight like me?!?! Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

As a parent, if you haven't heard “the kids don't do that with me!” yet, brace yourself: you probably will. It's a common sore spot I hear from many parents I talk to, and I have a pretty simple explanation regarding why children act differently around different people. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I broke a brand new jar of jam on the floor today, and made a mess: both on the floor, and in my reaction. I was feeling overwhelmed already - thinking I had too much to do, and not enough time to do it - and that jar of jam was just the straw that broke the camel's back. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

My dad was very handy when I was growing up and he passed on a lot of that knowledge to me. As a result I can handle a lot of electrical, construction and woodworking around the house. But he also handed down his disdain for one of the trades: plumbing. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

The holidays are a natural time for upping your family visiting game. But once you have a kid, it can get out of control and become overwhelming. Setting boundaries is something that takes time to perfect, but if you can get a handle on it the holidays can be even more enjoyable. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Having a five-year-old at Christmas is so much fun! It brings back the magic of the season that we sometimes lose as we move into adulthood. Going through the traditions with Niko really brings the fun back to the surface and I plan on soaking it all in. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

While planning a day to spend with Niko, I found myself compiling a list of super fun, exciting things to do. When Niko arrived though, he wasn't feeling up to a big day out, so we ended up staying home and just enjoying each other's company. It was awesome. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

It's been a draining week. I knew it would be challenging, but I was surprised by the toll it took on me. Niko, understandably, had many ups and downs this week, and the downs really hit me hard. I've learned some great lessons though, and I'd like to share them with you. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Well, the move went really well, mostly due to a surprise helper. It's my first official day as a single parent, and tonight Niko is going to have his first night in our new home. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I have officially stepped into a new phase in my life, and I know some of you are/have too. This won't change the direction of this podcast, but it's a big event in my life so I wanted to share it with you. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Tracy Hogg was a post-partum doula, who helped families to settle in bringing home a new baby. Her wealth of knowledge is shared in this amazing book, and is an amazing resource for new parents. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Unfortunately we've set up some not-so-great sleep habits with Niko, and we are working with him now to overcome them. The good news is you can avoid these types of problems by seeking out advice from gentle sleep coaches, and I'll tell you about my favourite resource today. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Outside of general health, sleep is every new parents' biggest concern. Thankfully, scientists have highlighted the problems with the cry-it-out method, and now there are many gentler options available for establishing healthy sleep habits with your kiddo. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

As men, it can be hard to ask for help. We stuff it and keep moving. As you grow as a father and accumulate new experiences and skills, one that I want you to really ensure you get into your arsenal is learning to ask for help. I've got a few pointers on how to ease into it. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

The early days with your kiddo can get pretty monotonous. It can seem like a waste of time to try to get outside, but a quick download of vitamin D, combined with seeing that the world is still turning, can be very rejuvenating. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

We all do it, in the trenches, in the middle of the night, exhausted: Wondering if you made a huge mistake becoming a dad. It's scary to say it out loud, but the simple acknowledgement of those feelings, can allow you to move past them more quickly. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

With a newborn, everything is new. Firsts for you, for your partner and for your kiddo. Sometimes those initial steps can be scary or difficult, but with a quick mindset adjustment you can maximize your opportunity to unearth some often untapped joy. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Do you know the meaning of the word, “constant”? Well dad, in those first weeks of parenting, you're bound to find out! Having a newborn at home can be very difficult to adjust to. I put this podcast together as a shout out to our brothers in the trenches, to say that you're not alone, this is normal, it will pass and to give you a couple pointers for self-care along the way. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Whether you birthed at home or in a hospital, there will come the first night when you're alone with the baby without any trained medical professionals around to help you. Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

I love watching my son play. And today was His first day of Pee Wee soccer at the YMCA. In his first ever game, on the first drive of the first game of the season, Niko made his dad PROUD!!! Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

Getting sick always sucks. As a Dad, you know family life doesn't slow down for you. But this time, my body breaking down under the stress I've been under happened at the worst possible time. Hopefully this will serve as a painful lesson to take better care of myself. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron

For Niko's birthday, I got him an awesome bike ... from Craigslist. I'm having some conflicting feelings about giving him a used bike. In the rest of my life, I am happy to buy used, in fact, my own bike was pre-loved, but for some reason, I was struggling with the idea of giving Niko an up-cycled gift. Links to check out: Sign up for updates: www.drjaywarren.com/dadhood Join The Dadhood Journey Private Facebook Group Follow Jay Warren on Instagram: @doctorjaywarren Learn about Men of Iron: www.drjaywarren.com/menofiron