Road Rants

Jake and Freddy continue their search for the best burger in Nashville.  On the way there, they discuss what "the perfect burger" means to us and how Jake has a system for finding the best things in life, thanks to being a "review whore".  On the way back they discuss what keeps us from doing what we want to do: ambiguity, lack of consistency, and ultimately fear. They realize that the mistakes and failures along the journey are so important to success but are often left out of the story. This leads to a decision to document their decision making for the podcast, execute on them, and let the listeners join along for the ride.  Next stop Brother’s Burgers! Find out what rating Jake and Freddy give Brother's in the episode. As always, buckle up! Because there are some real a**holes on the road. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

It's been a  minute - actually it's been exactly one year since the birth of Road Rant and Jake and Freddy are still at it.  Join them as they start their journey to find the best burger in Nashville. On the way there and back they talk about how owning your mistakes doesn't necessarily account for them and the quicksand pit that is self-awareness. What's on the other side? Self-discovery. First stop, Riverside GrillShack! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Aaaaand we're back! This time we ride around with the lovely MC Hoffner, aka Jake's Yogi. Ride with us while we discuss photos dudes should stop sending, Jake's vehicle preferences (donks), Yogic practices, and everything in between. So as always, buckle up buttercup... because Freddy is back behind the wheel. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Jake and Freddy bring along their buddy and "swolemate" Will. His British accent is more of an "accident" and his take on waving to cars on the road don't line up with the host's. It makes for a unusual, but interesting ride! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Freddy and Jake discuss the merits of being “nice”. Do you value niceness? Do you want the world to be nice? If so, you gotta listen to this episode, and if not, you still gotta listen to this episode. It's insightful, its fun, but whatever you do... don't call it nice. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Join Freddy, Jake, and the hilarious Caroline as they play a game of Love Hate Hate. You'll hear about the strangest crush of all time, bacon hatred, and you'll get to meet the one person on Earth that hates the Beatles. Pop a Topo Chico and enjoy a helluva ride! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

The guys take Jake’s classic purple Explorer that squeaks more than “buses in third world countries” for the latest episode.  The guys discuss what they have been up to on their hiatus and introduce their newest inspiration, David Goggins, and deliberately doing things that suck.  Buckle up buttercup! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Join Jake and Freddy as they play a game of story-telling one-upmanship at the request of their listeners. Jake plays GaGa ball with a celebrity, wins big with the help of a homeless man in Vegas, finds his biological parents, and watches a knife fight up close. Freddy meets Bruce Willis, learns a lesson in gambling, gets stung by a scorpion, is kicked out of a bar in Israel, and convinces our old friend Rodney Stewart to eat a beetle. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Pack into the Kia with Jake and Freddy as they have a great conversation with author, Courtney Ogunpola whose new book is called Day 1’s: College & Trap. We discuss cultural appropriation, white women and the forbidden fruit, and the possible whereabouts of Sarah, and Franky (Freddy) can’t get out of his gym membership. Buckle up and get ready to bring levity to some real shit. Show Notes [0:00] - The guys get the studio in order. [1:31] - Jake put on the Polo joint for Courtney. [2:54] - Courtney introduces his latest book Day 1’s: College & Trap. [3:47] - Courtney misses the first day of college classes. [4:44] - The kindergarten girls cried when young Courtney showed interest. [7:57] - Courtney praises us on the podcast… It’s all about execution, folks! [9:18] - Freddy tells us that he needs to be offended more often so other people aren’t offended. [10:55] - Jake has banished the words “man” and “woman” from his vocabulary, and Courtney is trying to make “You go, Woman!” a thing. [11:45] - Should white kids wear Black Panther costumes? [13:12] - On cultural appropriation, video game emotes, and Erik Killmonger. [18:02] - Courtney praises Rap Rants, and Jake blushes. [20:12] - Jake does a quick break down of the modern crisis of meaning. [23:41] - The forbidden fruit. [27:02] - Sarah goes missing from school. If anyone knows her whereabouts tell her to hit us up. [30:00] - Courtney and Freddy discuss being second generation Americans, and Courtney's impression of his father is incredible. [31:54] - Jake solicits dates from girls even though he’s married. We think he was kidding, but give it a shot and find out. [33:30] - Jake is Franky’s… uh… I mean… Freddy’s pro bono life coach. [34:03] - Courtney explains his latest venture — Friends with Trucks. [36:29] - Freddy can’t get out of his gym membership, and Jake suggests closing his bank account and fucking up his credit. [38:00] - Jake discovers that Freddy still has the discrete packaging in the back of his car from the first episode. First things first, y'all have to check out Courtney's latest book Day 1's: College & Trap. I'm reading it now, and it's raw, real, and a really entertaining read. Make sure to give it a good review on Amazon... people pay attention to those and the book deserves it, y'all. Also, be sure to follow Courtney on Instagram! Freddy mentions Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse and the guys let him know his nerd is showing. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Wherein the Coif Whisperer (Freddy) gets a call from our first call-in fan, Gary the vampire with cheap, smelly Halloween makeup and a dollar store cape gets fired while in costume, and Jake gives the secrets of his proudest accomplishment... losing 80lbs and keeping it off for 7 years. Buckle up and get ready for a spooky, hilarious, inspirational, and informative ride! It's all that shit at the same time, like, seriously. Show Notes [0:00] Jake feels like a foreigner at Chik-fil-A. The boys eat like the #basic. [1:32] How would you feel if a fire truck pulled up with stuffed pumpkins all over it when your entire life has gone up in flames? [3:12] Freddy is the Coif Whisperer. [4:02] Our first call-in guest gives us a ring and she has “401k toes” and a hankering for guacamole. [5:16] Freddy takes corrective action in the studio by explaining “The Studio Shotgun Privileges” to Jake. [6:52] On yuppies dressing up on Halloween. [9:12] Freddy’s family costume. [10:01] Gary the vampire career-man gets fired. [14:15] Freddy’s stint as a hipster loan shark for the government. [19:07] Freddy takes a page out of Ron Swanson’s book by teaching his kids about taxes through Halloween candy. [21:10] Jake tells about his most proud accomplishment - losing 80lbs and keeping it off for 7 years. [22:10] Jake was a drinking boy with a husky problem. [24:00] Jake quits drinking for love and shows his age again with a Hulk Hogan reference. [28:48] Meat and veggies, folks! [30:00] Jake explains why he has long hair and wears flip-flops in the winter. [32:03] Intermittent fasting and no snacking. [33:01] Alcohol is tough when you’re losing weight on multiple levels. [35:30] You don’t have to worry about organic, pasture raised, free range stuff to effectively lose weight. [36:23] Freddy makes a commitment and wants all of our dear listeners to be his accountability partner. [37:46] Freddy cajoles Jake into working out. Jake expresses his displeasure. [38:58] Get yourself a Segway you’ll be cooler ’n’ shit. [40:05] Go visit our website now! You will love it! You’re currently reading the show notes. Check out Rap Rants here. [41:02] The fellers unveil the newest addition to the Road Rants family Rap Rants! Check. That. Shit. Out. [43:02] With Jake driving, y’all miss out on Freddy getting lost. We apologize, and we’ll get back to the regularly scheduled broadcast soon. "He who has a why to live can bear almost any how." ~ Friedrich Nietzsche --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Join us for our first Ride-Along with badass musician Daniel Barnett whose musical duo Parasail has talks about his new album, Parasail I. The guys talk creativity and inspiration, balancing life while juggling a family, passion projects, and work. Oh and they encounter a flock of professionals on Bird scooters and aren't quote sure what to make of it. Show Notes [0:56] Meet the illimitable Daniel Barnett as he discusses the beginnings of his band Parasail. [3:01] We discuss where Parasail comes up with their beautiful and interesting song names. [4:58] We talk literary influences and creating atmospheric vibes. [4:55] The Sorting Hat would have trouble with Jake. [6:00] Drawing inspiration from real life [8:00] Establishing a creative routine versus being a conduit for creativity. [11:10] Everyday Daniel’s hustlin’, and Jake hates Effective Altruism. [15:10] Daniel talks about touring with his old metal band The Deadlight Effect. [16:36] Fatherhood and juggling life in a band. [18:02] Growing up with nine siblings and playing drums at the church. [19:53] Jake is rhythmically challenged. [20:58] Freddy is bullshitin’ about not being able to speak Spanish. Jake heard him speak it in a pupuseria. [21:37] Music lessons and allowing kids to follow their passion. [23:00] Kids these days with Fortnite and Call of Duty, amirite? [24:59] We are asking everyone to please pester Freddy to get his kids a real gaming console. [25:13] Bird scooters and the professionals that ride them. [26:44] Getting younguns Jordan’s and Yeezy’s. [27:00] Freddy impresses everyone with backing into a parking space. Be sure to check out Parasail’s new album, Parasail I - EP! You will love it, and you can find it on Spotify and Apple Music. Now, the Hemingway quote Jake meant to give: “Always stop while you are going good and don’t think about it or worry about it until you start to write the next day. That way your subconscious will work on it all the time. But if you think about it consciously or worry about it you will kill it and your brain will be tired before you start.” ~ Ernest Hemingway The quote that was actually given (which is, admittedly, more beautiful): “I had learned already never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.” ~ Ernest Hemingway Daniel suggested to Freddy that he read the Kingkiller Chronicles by Patrick Rothfuss. Freddy read it and loved it. “This is the riveting first-person narrative of Kvothe, a young man who grows to be one of the most notorious magicians his world has ever seen. From his childhood in a troupe of traveling players, to years spent as a near-feral orphan in a crime-riddled city, to his daringly brazen yet successful bid to enter a legendary school of magic, The Name of the Wind is a masterpiece that transports readers into the body and mind of a wizard.“ --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Ready for another ride and a little philosophy? Listen to Jake try to convince everyone that Cersei Lannister from GoT is a better human than Jim Halpert from The Office. We get to hear “mid-coitus”, “Jesus tattoo”, and “Imodium” in the same story, and Freddy’s wife Jenn causes Burger King workers to revolt by ordering 100 chicken nuggets. Buckle up and get ready for an interesting ride! "But it is the same with man as with the tree. The more he seeks to rise into the height and light, the more vigorously do his roots struggle earthward, downward, into the dark, the deep - into evil." - Friedrich Nietzsche Show Notes [0:00] Freddy drags Jake through more mud by recapping his sex and war comment from Part I of this episode. [0:30] Jim Halpert’s only chance with Cersei Lannister would be if they were related. [5:30] Where Jake pisses off all humans looking for love (which is just about everyone), and Freddy asks “Have you tried Bumble?”. [9:04] Jake attempts to keep the mob of pitchfork-wielding civilized people at bay with regard to his sex and war comment from Part I. [11:23] Jake ponders whether or not sex can stand up to evolution. [13:00] Do we really have free will? [14:12] Freddy eats 100 Burger King chicken nuggets and the workers revolt. [18:15] The entire goal of spiritualism is to gain the ability to act. [23:00] Jake unpacks a Friedrich Nietzsche quote about trees and roots. [24:46] Jake and Freddy look for Dave Ramsey’s house, and realize that he really is doing better than he deserves. [27:01] Was Freud’s work just Nietzsche’s work repackaged? [28:38] Fuck’d upper n’a football bat and Jake has the worst Southern accent Freddy has every heard. [30:30] Rod-neh Stewe-urt experiments with overdosing on Imodium in Israel. [37:00] Coifing mid-coitus and surprise Savior tattoos. [38:25] The gift of La Croix that is still sitting in Freddy’s car to this day. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Get in the back seat with Jake in Freddy for this episode wherein Freddy gives listeners a sh*tty path to losing 10 lbs in 5 days, puns as a weak attempt at humor are investigated, and Jake and Freddy discuss their Myers Briggs types in relation to Game of Thrones. You'll also hear Jake admit a slight respect for Ramsey Bolton and his desire to "smash" Khal Drogo. Hilarity ensues. Show Notes [0:00] Freddy spoils Lord of the Rings for all of our listeners. [0:50] Where Freddy presents Jake the new lapel mics. [1:20] Jake finds his style archetype, and it’s “rakish”. [2:30] How to keep your hair on fleek. [3:55] How to pull off being inconsiderate in traffic. [5:10] There are two kinds of people: high-fivers and head-nodders. [6:55] Freddy takes DRASTIC measures to lose enough weight to keep $250. [12:40] Why do guys think dick pics are a good idea? [13:35] Jake and Freddy discuss whether or not puns are punny. [19:15] Jake is blown away at the concept of buying bottled water. [22:15] The greatest drink in the world: Pamplemousse La Croix. [23:40] Where we learn that Freddy is an ESL that brooms floors. [26:30] Myers Briggs, Game of Thrones, and Jake’s slight admiration from Ramsey Bolton. [31:45] Jake admits he has a man-crush on Khal Drogo. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message

Join Jake and Freddy for a ride through downtown Nashville! In this episode, we discuss things like: career vs. calling, defeating self-consciousness, how being yourself draws the right crowd, and how Instagram feeds off of our insecurities. Buckle up, because with Freddy behind the wheel you never know what'll happen - he'll get lost. Show Notes [0:50] Do people really want the world the patriarchy has created? [2:30] Calling is better than a career. [4:00] White chicken sucks. Dark meat is the only correct answer. [5:15] Debbie Does Dallas and vintage porn. [7:44] Fat people running are courageous and motivating [11:20] Freddy talks the beginning of his podcast dreams [13:30] Creative vulnerability and making shit happen [14:15] Dealing with insecurity and Instagram [22:57] Finding your tribe [26:24] I love you, but fuck you. [27:15] Jake waxes poetically about his ideal guest, Bill AKA The Swag God [30:19] Freddy wants to stop editing the episodes. Jake is horrified. "It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence. - Ralph Waldo Emerson --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/roadrants/message