Tough Love Energy

Welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY PODCAST.  This is the third and final part of my very special ‘RELEASE & RECEIVE' series. I'm really pleased to be gifting you with this three-part podcast series for you to listen to, in your own time and at your own pace.. Now, if you haven't yet listened to the first two episodes, please go back and listen to them before listening to today's episode…. It's ok, I'll wait!  This final part of the process is all about welcoming in 2023 and creating your vision for the next year. Some of us find this part very exciting. But for a lot of us, it can feel very daunting. There is so much noise around at this time of year about changing our habits, improving, growing, expanding, doing something new, being someone new. Perhaps you've gotten swept up in some of those messages yourself already.  The temptation can be to want, and need, to change absolutely everything, all at once. And whilst I appreciate the enthusiasm, this very often leads us to feel totally overwhelmed. We get so paralysed by everything that we need to do and so we end up doing nothing.  That's really not what I want for you as we step into this new year, so before we go any further, please do approach this with lots of compassion for yourself. Transformation takes time and very often requires steady, grounded and consistent action.  As you start to dream up and imagine your new year ahead, remember to stay true to the deep yearnings, the whispers of your intuition and what it is that feels right to you, rather than being distracted by what you think you should be doing.  You'll need your notepad and pen again, as we'll work through another series of journal prompts to help you clear on what it is you want for this next year. We'll explore what it is you really long for, what goals and intentions you wish to work towards, how you'd like to feel next year and what boundaries you desire to set for yourself in 2023.  In this episode, I'll also guide you to set an affirmation for the new year and to decide on your ‘word' for 2023. If you're a client of mine, you'll know how much I love a good morning practice, so I'll guide you to create one of those for yourself as well.  The year ahead is yours to make of it based on what your heart really wants. And what is it your heart wants? Listen carefully to what it has to say. And then do that. However long it takes, whatever help you may need, promise yourself you will do it. And believe that you can. Then watch while the magic happens.  Thank you so much for listening to this series, and I hope you enjoyed it. I'd really love to hear from you and to know what you're calling in for 2023. Sometimes sharing it can make it feel more real!! The TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast will be back again in 2023 with a brand new season. I very much look forward to sharing more with you in the months to come.  In the meantime, if you haven't yet got a copy of my book, ‘Get Unstuck', I think it could really help you as you step over the threshold into this new year. You can get your very own copy here: www.niamhennis.com/book. Happy New Year!  From my heart to yours,  Niamh xx 

In this second instalment of my special three-part ‘Release and Receive' series, I'm sharing with you my ‘Bridge Meditation' which I wrote and recorded especially for this occasion.  Now, if you haven't yet listened to last week's episode on ‘RELEASING 2022', please go back and listen to that and have your journal and pen at the ready. Your thoughts and reflections from the journaling prompts will inform how this week's special episode resonates with you.  Once you've listened to episode one, you're ready for the Bridge Meditation. And it is exactly as it sounds, it's a bridge between this year and the next, a guided journey to help you release everything you've experienced in this year and to make space to receive the new year ahead.  It's a beautiful practice, and I hope you'll take the time to work through it at some point in this in-between space between 2022 and 2023. (and can always be listened to again and again) It's a closed eye exercise, so please do listen to it in a safe and comfortable space. You'll want to make yourself really comfortable as you work through it, perhaps you might like to light a candle and wrap yourself up in a favourite blanket.  I hope you enjoy the meditation and I'd love to hear how you get on with it. I'll be back again on the 31st December with the final part in this series, ‘RECEIVING 2023'. You won't want to miss it! Thanks for listening.  Until next time, much love, Niamh xx  

Hello and welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY Podcast. We're back with a very special three-part series to finish out the year, which I'm so excited to share with you.  For the last couple of years, each December I've hosted my popular ‘Release and Receive' online workshops, as a way of reviewing and letting go of the energy of the current year, so that we can create space for all that we desire and want in the year to land. Many of you have been asking if I am planning to run it again this year. Well, I really wanted to find a way to thank you, my community, for all the support you have given me throughout this past year and especially with the release of my debut book, ‘Get Unstuck' (find out more here). I also know that there's a lot going on for everyone right now, so this year, as a special gift from me to you, I've decided to release the workshop as a three-part podcast series. This way it can be accessible to as many people as possible right now, and you can listen to it at a time that best suits you.  In this first part of the series, we'll be looking back on 2022. Before we can begin anything new, we must first acknowledge what has been and what has happened, both to us and for us. The pace of the world we live in, means that we often don't allow ourselves the time to do this; the time to allow one chapter to properly come to an end, before we're already racing off on to the next thing.  But, if we don't make time to do this, our emotions and feelings can get caught up in a bottleneck, and that's when overwhelm can kick in.  So, in this first episode of the series, we'll begin by taking a good look back at the lessons we learned in 2022, so that we can know with certainty what we want to bring with us into the new year. We'll take the time first to release all that has NOT served us in 2022 in order to make space for all the things that we want to carry over into 2023.  We'll also acknowledge and identify what we really loved about 2022, what went well,  what we achieved, what we're proud of. It's important to get clear on this too, so that we can pack in our flight bag for 2023!  You'll want to have a notebook and pen handy as you listen to this episode, as I'll be guiding you through a series of journaling prompts to work through. And as this is a podcast, do feel free to hit pause as often as you need as you work through the questions. Are you ready? Then let's begin... Remember to be really kind and compassionate to yourself as you listen to the episode and consider your answers. Above all, please be honest with yourself – these answers are for your eyes and ears only, and there is absolutely nothing to be gained by pretending or shying away from the truth. Your honesty will help you identify what needs work and improvement, as well as what went well and what you'd like to keep doing. It is so important to get clarity on that for yourself as we head into the New Year.  Thank you for listening, I hope you enjoy the episode and working through the journal prompts. A reminder that my debut book, Get Unstuck, is now available – it will make the perfect stocking filler for a loved one, or even as a treat to yourself. You can order a signed copy from my website here (purchase your copy here).  I'll be back next week for part two of this special series, which will be a calming and grounding meditation.  Until next time, much love, Niamh xx  

This week's episode of the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast is the last episode in this current series, as I'll be taking a short break over the summer months. All the themes in this second series were requested by you and included topics such as procrastination, discovering your purpose and what it means when you see signs everywhere. This week's episode is no different and focuses on picking yourself up after a crisis. We all know the feeling. You get knocked down. You cry. You feel the pain. You wallow. You get angry. You plot your revenge. You cry some more. You feel a bit better. You brush yourself down and off you go again. Until the next time. The biggest challenge though is in knowing just how long we will stay at each stage, and what it will leave us with when we emerge. What will we have learned? And will we be more likely to believe something happened to us rather than instead believing it may have happened for us?  Life can be special, joyful and beautiful, but it always has the potential to unexpectedly pull the rug from underneath us. Bad things happen to good people, and each of us will at some point experience loss, disappointment, adversity and hurt. But what makes the difference between someone who barely survives these challenges in life, and someone who meets these challenges head-on and is able to thrive and bloom? This podcast will answer that! In this episode, I share with you six things you can do to help yourself navigate through your next crisis. I also ask you to remember that, when you do emerge from a personal crisis, whilst you may be different and it may have changed you, this is what growing and evolving looks like. It's when you stop trying to control life that you actually start living. I hope this episode is useful and helps you to be kinder to yourself when you're next faced with a crisis. While this may be all for this series, I might pop in with a bonus episode or two over the summer. And don't forget, there are plenty of past episodes available for you to listen to whenever you like.  As always, I love to hear from you - and if you have any topics you want me to cover in the next series, please do send them over to me.  Have a great summer & thanks for listening! From my grateful heart to yours. Niamh x 

TOUGH LOVE ENERGY – SEASON 2 EPISODE 7 This week on the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast, I'm asking the question, why is it that so many of us are reluctant to tell people that we pray? Why do we feel we need to keep to ourselves that our own personal belief is that there is something bigger that just might be guiding us and helping us in life? Since I was very young, my faith has meant so much to me and is a big part of who I am. Yet the upheaval and damning negative press that religious institutions have quite rightly received in recent years, left me wondering where it was I fit in anymore. I've really struggled with just how to reconcile my need for connection to something bigger than myself with everything that was happening with the Catholic institution. Yet it's worth reminding ourselves that it's not all that long ago that meditation was considered 'new-age' and 'hippy', yet now it is an accepted and medically proven practice that we can all benefit from. Deepak Chopra addresses this so beautifully, when he says that 'prayer is for asking the questions and meditation is about listening for the answers'. Being religious and being spiritual are two very different things, and you must remember that you don't need to be religious to pray. When I realised that my faith didn't require an institution and that I could engage my spirituality without that religious practice, I began to feel a lot more liberated. In this episode I offer an answer to the question "so what is prayer?" To my mind, it is is a conversation you have with whoever, whatever you believe in. The chances are that you already pray quite regularly, you just may not recognise it as prayer. If you are struggling with your own beliefs, don't overthink it. Prayer is just another way of ensuring that you get that little bit of extra help that you need along the way.  When we pray, we simply hand over the desired outcome to something bigger than ourselves without feeling that we are burdening anyone.  I truly hope that this episode will resonate with many of you. I'd love to hear your thoughts and what prayer means to you. Until next time, with much love, Niamh x 

This week on the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast, I'm talking all about moving the goalposts in our lives.  Do you find yourself pushing forward to get somewhere or achieve something only to get there and that feeling of satisfaction proves elusive?  My own coach pointed out to me recently that I have, in her words, ‘unrelenting standards'. Whilst I initially received this as a compliment, after sitting with it for a while, I realised that it should in fact be considered a flaw of mine.  I know that I expect a lot from myself. I have a tendency to push myself to get as much done as possible, and I'm motivated by trying to do better each time. I believe these are positive traits, and there's nothing wrong with any of that. However, where it starts to become a problem is when I don't give myself the time to celebrate or even recognise what I've done. My focus and attention are already on the next thing that needs doing.  The reality is that I've always been like this, but it really hit home a few months ago when I achieved what has been a childhood dream of mine. I share the full story with you in the episode – but essentially, this situation has made me realise that I never allow myself to feel like I have arrived.  To use a sporting analogy, I run up and down the pitch, shifting the goalposts ever so slightly each time I score a goal. And you know what? It's incredibly exhausting. My feeling is that this week's episode will resonate with many of you and I hope it inspires you to consider if, and where, this might be showing up for you in your own life. As always, I love to hear from you, so do let me know if it resonated.   And before you go, I wanted to remind you about my 5-week self-study course, The Change Accelerator, which is now open for enrollment. If you're looking to make changes in your life, work or business, this programme will give you the tools to create change with increased confidence. Find out more here: https://www.niamhennis.com/accelerator Until next time, much love,  Niamh x 

Have you discovered your purpose?  This week on the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast, I'm exploring the topic of purpose. Most people like the idea of pursuing their purpose, but they just have no clue where to start.  So, what does uncovering your purpose really mean? The actual dictionary definition of purpose is the reason that something exists. For some people, their purpose is deeply connected to their vocation and what they do. But it doesn't have to be about that - it can really be, and  often is, something much simpler. My personal belief is that your purpose is that thing that creates real meaning in your life at any given time. Not only can it shape your goals and influence your behaviour, but it can also give you a deep understanding of who you really are.  In this episode, I share a little about my own experiences discovering my own purpose and the path that my purpose has ultimately led me on throughout my life. And because I want to make this as practical as possible for you, I'll also share my three tips for finding and discovering your purpose for yourself. These three simple ideas will help to connect you with what you love doing, what others appreciate and value in you, and to discover how to find a deeper meaning within your own challenges and struggles.  Whilst the idea of purpose might seem a bit ‘fluffy', I believe that living a meaningful, fulfilling life has a huge impact on your mental and physical health – and we can never underestimate that. I really hope that you find this episode helpful and that it inspires you to take some time to think more deeply about some of the things I cover here.  And if you'd like my support on your onwards journey towards uncovering your more meaningful life, my 5-week self-study course, The Change Accelerator, is open for enrolment now. If you're looking to make changes in your life, work or business, this programme will give you the tools to create change with increased confidence. Find out more here: https://www.niamhennis.com/accelerator Enjoy your journey towards your purpose! Until next time, much love,  Niamh x

Welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast. This week, I'm sharing a topic that I've been receiving a lot of requests about in recent weeks, and that's procrastination.  In today's episode, I consider the question of why some of us will do things today and others will always put them off until tomorrow.  From the offset, I want to say that I consider myself to be one of life's doers. I'm definitely an action taker.  I like having a deadline and something to aim for. I also know that I like to do whatever it is I need to do well ahead of time. But, I have friends who are the complete opposite! And so, I know that for some people, the last-minute pressure of a deadline helps to drive and motivate them, and they work best that way.  Whether you thrive on getting things done last minute, or like to have it all sorted sooner, it's likely you've faced procrastination at some point and put off doing something because you simply don't want to do it. What I want to focus on in this episode, are the reasons why we procrastinate in the first place. What is it that drives us to put things off, versus doing them right now?  First of all, let's take a look at what procrastination means. Procrastination is the ultimate act of delaying or postponing a task or set of tasks. When people procrastinate, they are deferring or delaying priorities and instead choosing to focus on less important, more attractive or simpler duties. Procrastination can be considered as another form of self-sabotage. Your fear of failure, or being seen to fail, your concern of being judged or laughed at, your anxiety of not being good enough may all overpower your desire or need to get things done.  Despite what you might have been told in the past, procrastination is about more than just being lazy or unable to manage your time better, so you can stop feeling bad about your propensity to postpone or put things off! It's a much more profound problem than we may realise – and yet, the good news is that you can definitely work on it and overcome these tendencies.  During the episode, we'll explore the three main types of procrastinators that I've identified. Listen in and see which one you recognise yourself in the most. I'll also share some of the reasons why people procrastinate. Some of the most common reasons are around low confidence or self-esteem, or a fear of failure. It's important to remember that when we resist doing something, there is usually a pretty good reason, even if it doesn't make any logical sense at first.  The key to overcoming procrastination begins with realising that you are doing it, and instead of beating yourself up about what is a very common problem, try and investigate more deeply just what's causing it and where it began. When you understand the reasons behind your behaviour, you can have a much better chance of uncovering the right strategy to manage and overcome it. In this episode, I'll also walk you through my four tips for overcoming procrastination. You'll find here some strategies that will really help you to take action, and realise where your tendency to procrastinate may be coming from.  I hope that you find this episode useful and that it helps you to understand yourself and your tendencies around procrastination a little better. I'd love to hear from you and what resonated for you from today's episode.  As I mention at the end of the episode, my brand-new self-study programme, The Change Accelerator, is now open for enrolment. If there's something you've been wanting to change, this 5-week programme will help you to do just that, at your own pace. Find out more here: https://www.niamhennis.com/accelerator.  Until next time, much love,  Niamh x

Welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast. In this week's podcast we are exploring our friendships. The good ones and those we need to let go of! This is a hard topic because none of us ever want to contemplate having to let friendships go. It feels unkind and even cruel but the truth is often it can be the kindest thing we do for them and for us. In this episode I talk about what happens when we release the people pleaser in ourselves and do everything in our power to make ourselves indispensable to our friends, in the hope that they won't leave us. I did this and it didn't end well! Letting go of friendships is hard. At some point, you may feel that you and a friend just don't connect anymore, you might find that you have less in common or even feel that they're treating you differently and are taking from your life rather than adding to it. Similar to a romantic relationship, you may know that it's no longer working for you, but when the time comes to end the friendship, to ‘break up', it can be next to impossible to do. Why is that?  So, what does friendship really mean? I talk about what it means for  me, how I know what a true friendship looks like now and more importantly how it feels like. I resisted letting friends go until I realised it was actually quite healthy. People come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime we just need to get better knowing which is which. We also look at those friendships that are not good for us – the toxic ones – and how to recognise when they show up in your life. This is not an easy topic I get that. I still find it hard but I've recognised that by removing people who take from me all of the time I am creating space for those who know also how to give and that makes it something worth doing.   We crave connection and to build a network around us. We may have different groups of friends that serve different purposes and that can be a really positive thing to have, but the reality is that sometimes friendships can just change. In the long run, it's much better to cut ties, and to find people who truly appreciate and support you, as you are, right now.  To help I share with you my top five signs to watch out for that might indicate a friendship needs to be released. I'll be interested to see which of these resonate with you. Our friendships should, by definition, make us feel better, but if you find that every time you've been with a certain friend, or friends, you feel worse afterward, then you really need to explore why this is happening. This episode I hope will inspire and encourage you to do just that. You can connect with me over on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis and over in my free Facebook community, The Changing Room, here: www.facebook.com/groups/thechangingroom1. And if you haven't yet taken my free People Pleasing Quiz, you can do that here: https://www.niamhennis.com/quiz.  Until next time, much love,  Niamh x 

Welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast.  In this week's episode, I'm exploring something slightly different. As much as possible, I try to share practical tips and tools to help you around a particular topic, but this week, I wanted to share with you some more about the idea of ‘signs from the universe', and what exactly it means when we see these signs around us.  Not that long ago, I was a little worried that I was becoming obsessed with seeing signs in just about everything, and so I put this question into Google to try and understand further - ‘What does it mean when you keep seeing signs?'  What came back was this: the describing of signs as ‘tricks of the mind' and as ‘confirmation bias'. It went on to say, “we unconsciously seek such information out and then ascribe meaning to it, and that the real truth about seeing “signs” is that people often only look for them – or think they are seeing them – when they are uncertain.”  Whilst I didn't agree with this entire definition, I would say that they were right about the confirmation bias. We can definitely interpret signs to mean whatever it is that we want them to mean. But, it also made me realise that my looking out for signs and the meaning I ascribe to them has, in reality, given me enormous comfort over the years. As someone who has experienced a number of close personal bereavements in my life, I remember searching for signs that the person I was grieving wasn't totally gone. In the early days, when I wasn't sure who it was that I should be grieving (having experienced multiple losses in short succession), seeking and finding signs gave me a great deal of reassurance.  Naysayers and sceptics will write off the idea of seeing signs as mere coincidence - and if that's you, that's totally okay. When it comes down to it, only you know if you're open to the belief that the universe is sending you signs all the time.  During the episode, I explore some of the common signs that tend to show up for me, and others – such as dates of significance, repeated numbers and signs from the natural world. I also share an experience that happened to me recently, which felt very much written in the stars and that I just can't explain away rationally.  Whether you're a believer or not, signs can help us to make greater sense of the world around us, and find validation in our choices and decisions. I hope you enjoy the episode and that it gives you something to ponder over;  perhaps a new way of looking at the idea of signs and what they might mean to you.  As always, I love to hear from you so do share with me what you thought of this week's episode. Does the idea of seeing signs resonate with you? Is there a particular sign that you keep finding or noticing?  You can connect with me over on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis and over in my free Facebook community, The Changing Room, here: www.facebook.com/groups/thechangingroom1. And if you haven't yet taken my free People Pleasing Quiz, you can do that here: https://www.niamhennis.com/quiz.  Until next time, much love,  Niamh x 

Welcome to the second series of TOUGH LOVE ENERGY! I'm so excited to continue creating and sharing this podcast with you and I hope you enjoy what I have in store for you through this next series.  This week, I'll be exploring the difference between fitting in and belonging. Although the difference seems subtle on the surface, it can make a huge difference to our understanding of ourselves, our ability to make genuine, meaningful connections with others as well as our own self-worth.  Belonging is an instinctual desire to be part of something bigger than ourselves. It is a core human need, a feeling inside of us that we really can't control, we just want to feel connected and part of a wider community. We were never, ever, meant to do this business of life alone. The reality is that we need each other and we need to have that connection and that sense of community in our lives.  Paradoxically, we are more connected than ever on a global scale, through technology and social media, and yet we are less connected than ever with the people around us. And when you throw in the small matter of a global pandemic too, many of us have lost touch with what it means to really belong and it's becoming more difficult to establish those meaningful connections with the people around us.  The idea of ‘fitting in' comes into play through the motivation that many of us feel to be accepted. We are influenced, for example, into thinking that the more followers we have on social media, or the more likes we get on an Instagram reel or TicTok video, that this somehow portrays to the world our true worth. We started this behaviour in our childhood, when we often imitated the clothes, haircuts and style of our friends and develop the same interests, hobbies and tastes.  The truth is that the more you try to fit in, the less likely you are to belong. Fitting in is about looking at a given situation and then doing all you can to become exactly who you think you should be in order to be accepted. It's about moulding yourself to be the person you think you need to be, not who you really are. As I explore in this episode, the main issue that many of us are facing, is that we hold the mistaken belief that fitting in, being accepted, is the same as belonging. It is not. True belonging only occurs when we present ourselves as we are - the real, flawed, imperfect version of ourselves. Can you see the difference? I hope you find this episode helpful and that it encourages you to really consider your relationship and understanding to belonging and fitting in. Are you confusing the motivation to fit in for a sense of belonging? Where are you moulding yourself to be accepted? And how can you be more accepting of yourself, as you are right now?  As always, I love to hear from you so do share with me what you found useful. You can connect with me over on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/1niamhennis) and over in my free Facebook community, The Changing Room (https://www.facebook.com/groups/thechangingroom1).  Until next time, much love,  Niamh x

Well, here we are on New Year's Eve.  As we stand on the brink of a whole new year, a new beginning, a new chapter, I'm sharing a special bonus episode of the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast with you today.  It's a little different than usual, it's a guided meditation to help you ‘RELEASE & Receive' as we step into 2022. Come with me as I gently guide you to review and then release the memories, feelings, experiences, lessons and challenges from the last year, so that you can open yourself up to receive everything that your heart desires in 2022.  This is an opportunity to think about what the next year can, and will, hold for you. It's a closed-eye meditation, so before listening please find yourself a safe, comfortable and warm space to settle for the next 12 minutes or so.  I hope you'll take some time to work with this meditation and that it helps to ground and prepare you for the energy of 2022. You are ready.   I'd love to hear how you get on, so do let me know. I'll be back in early 2022 with the next season of the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast episodes, featuring myself and some fantastic special guests so do stay tuned for that. In the meantime, do come and connect with me over on Instagram and over in my free Facebook community, The Changing Room.  I'm sending you all my love and very best wishes for a happy and healthy New Year.  Until next time, much love, Niamh x

It's the Season Finale! This is the final episode of Season One of the Tough Love Energy podcast, before we take a break for the rest of the year, returning in 2022. I've so enjoyed putting together this series for you over the last year. Over the course of the previous 15 episodes, we've covered so many important topics and if you haven't listened to them all, I'd recommend you go back and catch up with the ones you missed!  Some of the themes we've explored so far this year have included: learning to forgive ourselves and others, people-pleasing, the stories that we might be living our life by and listening to the signs from our intuition. I've spoken about the importance of starting a daily practice and given you a framework for putting it into place. And I've shared with you how I found my voice and the confidence to share my own story.   One of the key threads that underpin both my coaching work, and what I share with you here in this podcast, is the idea of self-belief and self-acceptance. A foundational part of making changes is in believing that 1) you are able to make a change, 2) it is possible and 3) that it is entirely possible for you.  So this week, for our Season One Finale, I'm talking all about self-acceptance. For many of us, it can be hard accepting ourselves just as we are. And yes, whilst we can seek to improve and better certain aspects of ourselves, in the end, we are exactly who we are. Self-acceptance means accepting all the parts of ourselves – the good, the not so good and the parts that may need improvement.  If you know you have a tendency to be particularly tough on yourself, if you notice that you constantly criticise yourself and/or tend to approach things from a negative mindset, all of these are signs that you might be lacking in self-acceptance. During the episode, I share exactly why self-acceptance is so important and then give you four quick, simple steps to develop more self-acceptance, so that you can learn to be kinder to yourself and become more accepting of all the parts that make up who you are.   And when your levels of self-acceptance start to increase, you'll begin to experience other benefits, too. You'll feel more freedom to be yourself, you'll be more compassionate towards yourself and less self-critical when things go wrong.  I know that 2021 has been a difficult year for many. As we approach the end of the year, it's a great opportunity to reflect back on the highs and lows so that we can think about what we wish to take with us into 2022. Remember that we learn from our lows and they ultimately help us to evolve and create positive changes in our life. In the spirit of self-acceptance and our continued evolution, I invite you to join me for a nourishing end of year workshop happening at 7pm on Tuesday 14th December, called RELEASE & Receive. Come with me as we look back on the year gone by, draw a line under the aspects that you didn't enjoy and then open ourselves up to receive, as we mentally prepare to step into 2022. Tickets are available now for just €22 – you can find out more and book your place here: https://www.niamhennis.com/release-and-receive  Thank you so much for listening to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast this year. I hope that these episodes have inspired you, and encouraged you to make a change for yourself. Rest assured, I'll be back in early 2022 with a new season of episodes, featuring myself and some fantastic special guests so do stay tuned for that. In the meantime, do come and connect with me over on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/1niamhennis/) and over in my free Facebook community, The Changing Room (https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1).  Until next time,  Niamh x 

Hello and welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast! This is the penultimate episode in this series, which has really flown by. I'm busy making lots of plans for the podcast in 2022 so keep your eyes, and ears, peeled for that! In this week's episode, I'm talking about the importance of being able to trust your gut. While we might understand it, in principle, in practice, trusting your gut isn't quite so straightforward for many of us. Honestly, I can think of a few too many occasions where I simply ignored my own gut instinct; just because I thought I knew better. Of course, I know now how much better off I would have been, had I simply trusted the messages I received, but such is the benefit of hindsight! Over the years, I've worked hard to become more familiar with the signs showing me how these messages show up for me, so that I am better equipped to recognise and listen to them when they do arrive.  I like to think of our gut instinct as an extra sense, an extra resource, if you will, that can help us to determine how exactly we feel about something and then make an informed choice. Often, the most difficult part to grasp is in actually listening to this resource and then acting on the messages that we receive.  During this episode, I'll explore some of the common reasons why we don't always pay attention to our gut instinct. Chances are, you'll recognise yourself in some of those – and perhaps even recall some scenarios where you know you should have listened but didn't.  One of the most important things around listening to our gut is knowing exactly how it shows up for you because it's often very different from person to person. I'll give you some tips around recognising the signs from your own intuition, and how you can begin to listen more closely to its messages and really hear what it is telling you.  I see now that the times when I make the biggest mistakes were when I didn't listen to my intuition. My advice to you is simply to start to listen,  and over time, you'll begin to trust yourself, and your gut instinct, so much more.  I hope this episode is helpful. I'd love to hear what you took away from it and to hear about times in your own life when you did, or didn't, trust your instincts. You can connect with me over on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis/ or alternatively, over in my Facebook community, The Changing Room. You can join us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 Lastly, if you're enjoying this series, I'd love it if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your preferred podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5-star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Until next time,  Niamh x

Have you been playing the blame game?  Let's not beat around the bush. When things go wrong and life doesn't go to plan, it's far easier to put the blame on someone else rather than take full responsibility for our actions. This can be an uncomfortable topic to discuss, because in so doing, it requires us to acknowledge that playing the blame game, is very likely something that we recognise in ourselves and have done at some stage in our life.  Just like denial or projection, we use blame as a defense mechanism to ward off uncomfortable and negative situations, thoughts, feelings and emotions. So while it can serve a purpose, that does not make it right.  As we'll explore in this week's episode, there are several layers to the blame game.  At the heart of this behaviour, is an attempt to deflect away from our own actions as we find temporary relief in holding someone else to account for how we feel. We blame other people because it means that we don't have to deal with what's happening right in front of us. It gives us space to breathe, as we come to terms with whatever it is that has happened.  I can think of several examples, where this has played out in my life over the years, and I share some of those with you in this episode. I know that life can be really tough and the truth is, there's just not a lot we can do about that. But, it's important to acknowledge that none of us are ever completely helpless and we must be able to take full accountability for our actions and our feelings, regardless of what's happening. What I do know now is that, it is how we navigate through challenges and respond to the difficulties we encounter along the way, that really defines us. During this episode, I discuss the powerful shifts that occur, when we decide to take full responsibility for our lives and our actions and how you can begin to feel safe to do this for yourself.  I really hope that you'll find this episode helpful and that it will help prepare you to stop playing the blame game and to take radical self-responsibility for your thoughts, feelings and actions. Because on the other side of blame, awaits a great deal of strength and healing. And once you begin to put this into practice, you will regain the power, and the desire, to change your life, which feels incredible.  If you're enjoying this series, I'd love it if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your preferred podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5-star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. Find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 Until next time, Niamh x

This week on the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast, we're exploring the topic of forgiveness – the facts, the fiction and the truth.  It's inspired by my own recent experience with forgiveness, when I recently decided to forgive someone in my life. If I'm honest, it wasn't because they'd said sorry for the hurt they'd caused me, it was because I was worn out thinking about it and I knew I really needed that closure and peace of mind for myself.   One of the big ‘myths' around forgiveness is, that by forgiving someone, you are somehow either condoning what they've done or dismissing the truth of how you were hurt. Let's get this out of the way early, I want to be really clear that this is NOT what forgiveness is about. Forgiveness is about letting go, yes – but it's never about letting anyone off.  For me, the very best reason to forgive someone is that it puts an end to allowing what happened then, affect how we're living our lives right now. It puts a stop to the reliving of the hurt, disappointment, anger or betrayal, whatever emotion is at the heart of it for you, and releasing the hold it has over you. And that's really one of the best gifts you can give yourself. I talk further in the episode, on why exactly it is so important to practice forgiveness, and what can happen when we don't. Often, we'll simply shut down or lose perspective or in more extreme cases, we can become bitter, which is no good for anyone. Sometimes we might put up barriers in the hope that we're never hurt again, which just rarely works either.  I also share some guidance on how to go about forgiving someone. I'll walk you through the steps of forgiving and letting go so that you can understand what happened and why, process the emotions you're feeling and then come to a place where you are able to forgive, release and then move on from it.  If you're enjoying this series, I'd love it if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5-star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. Find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 Until next time, Niamh x

Welcome to another episode of TOUGH LOVE ENERGY.  This week, I'm addressing a question that I'm often asked about, especially since beginning this podcast – and that is how am I able to share the things that I do here on the podcast and across my social media channels.  I understand why people would want to ask this – it can be really hard to share your true thoughts and feeling on social media. It requires us to be vulnerable, and that's no easy thing. Putting your thoughts and opinions out there also means that you are opening yourself to other's opinions. For me, this is still very much part of the challenge of doing what I do. I can't say that I don't ever feel the fear of sharing my personal experiences, but when I made the decision to start doing this work, I firmly believed that I needed to be all in. And so, I keep showing up and sharing.  In this short and sweet episode, I talk further about how I find the courage to speak my truth - and what works for me. I also offer some of my own values around what is right and appropriate to share and how to know when is the right time to share it.  If you're a business owner who wants to become more visible online, I think you'll find this an especially helpful listen. But it also offers guidance for anyone who desires to be more vulnerable, open and honest. Have you taken my free People-Pleasing quiz yet? Not only will it help you identify which type of people-pleaser you are, but I also give you a number of practices to help you begin to shift old patterns and behaviours around people-pleasing. You can take the quiz for free here: https://www.niamhennis.com/quiz If you're enjoying this series, I'd love it if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5-star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. Find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 Until next time, Niamh x

Do you find it difficult knowing how to let go of people and friendships that are no longer serving you? This week on the podcast, I'm exploring this very topic – and it's one that many of us find very challenging indeed. One of the reasons, I think, that this is so difficult is because letting go of people feels so very final. The reality though is that, as we go through life, it's only natural for the people around us to change. We have different requirements for friendships as we move through the stages of our life. As I share in the podcast, people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime. In this episode, I talk a bit about how this ties into our deeper need to be liked, the need to fit in and ‘to belong'. My belief is that we're not supposed to belong in every friendship group, and although this can be hard to acknowledge, it's important that we do. We can waste a lot of time and energy trying to be liked by people who just aren't right for us. And letting go of people can be an important act of self-care, too. It's important that we can recognise when and where there are people in our life who have a consistent negative impact on our energy and how we feel. I share with you some of my thoughts on this topic, and the things that I've learned over the years around letting people go. I also offer some guidance on knowing when it's time to let go of someone and then on the flip side, how to know who you really value having as part of your life. That's your Tough Love Energy homework for this week, too – to spend some time reflecting on the people in your life, and whether there are any people who frequently bring you down. And if this episode resonated with you, I invite you to take my free People-Pleasing quiz. It will help you identify which type of people-pleaser you are, and therefore how people-pleasing tendencies may be showing up for you. Once you've completed the quiz, sign up to receive your results guide, which has a number of practices to help you begin to shift old patterns and behaviours around people-pleasing. You can take the quiz for free here: https://www.niamhennis.com/quiz If you're enjoying this series, I'd love it if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5-star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. Find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 Until next time, Niamh x

Welcome back to Tough Love Energy! After a short summer hiatus, I'm thrilled to be back with another episode for you.  This week, I'm exploring a topic that I'm asked about a lot. It's around boundaries – and specifically, how to say NO. It's only a little word – but for many of us, we often find ourselves saying ‘yes' when we really mean to say ‘NO'.  So, my hope for all of us is that we make this the year that we all finally learn when and how to say no.  Our lives have been turned upside down over the last 14 months and we've had to sacrifice many of the things that we were accustomed to doing. For a long time, social occasions – and the decisions that come around those - were just not an option and we got really used to that. We adapted with relative ease to not having to make those decisions or worry about doing it all and keeping those around us happy.  What I'm hearing now in my community, amongst my clients and in my social circles, is a fair amount of nervousness as the invitations begin to pour in for social gatherings, reunions, and other occasions.  Whilst of course it's wonderful to be able to see our loved ones, families, and friends again, what we must be mindful of is not falling back into our old patterns and habits of saying ‘yes' when we really mean ‘no'. If we take anything away from the events of the last year, it's the real importance of honouring our needs and taking good care of ourselves.  In this episode, I share with you some ideas and ways that you can say no, gracefully. I also re-affirm the reasons why this is so important, and how saying ‘yes' when you mean ‘no' links to our ‘people-pleasing' tendencies. I hope it will help you to find the confidence to step back into your power and get better at saying ‘NO' when you mean to.  And if this topic resonated with you, I invite you to take my free People-Pleasing quiz. It will help you identify which type of people-pleaser you are, and therefore how people-pleasing tendencies may be showing up for you. Once you've completed the quiz, sign up to receive your results guide, which has a number of practices to help you begin to shift old patterns and behaviours around people-pleasing. Take the quix here: www.niamhennis.com/quiz As always, I love to hear from you. You can find me on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis or get in touch over on my website: www.niamhennis.com.  If you're enjoying this series, I'd love it if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5-star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. Join us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1  Until next time,  Niamh x

Do you have a calling? In this week's episode, I'm diving deep into my personal beliefs and understanding of what it means to have a true calling.  For most of my life, I have carried this knowing, which I now know to be a belief, that we each of us have a calling. A reason for being here now, at this time, on this planet.  This is a part of us that doesn't come from our thinking minds… it's an inner knowing that comes from much, much deeper within. My belief is that our calling comes from our soul.   All of us have our own unique gifts and talents. For me, I've always loved to write. From the age of six, I've kept a journal which has been a haven for my innermost thoughts. My belief is that I am meant to write, to share my experiences, thoughts and feelings so that it might help others.   For a long time however, I kept this precious gift of mine hidden away. It seems crazy for me to say it out loud now, but I genuinely believed that my words weren't enough, that they weren't valuable enough to others simply because I hadn't suffered enough. What did I know about life, about suffering? I didn't feel qualified – and as a result, I kept my words, and my gift, locked away.  Some of you will know my life story already, and you'll know what happened next. But for those of you that don't, I had the dramatic life experiences I asked for. I experienced loss after loss, until I was the only one left standing.  And then the whisper of my calling returned. I've been doing my upmost to answer that call ever since.  This was a deeply personal episode for me. I share a lot of my own beliefs and experiences around the idea of having a calling, of having a deeper purpose that drives you through life. I really hope it inspires you to think about your life, your own calling and whether you are living in alignment with it. I'd love to hear what resonates for you, please do get in touch and let me know.  You can find me on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis or get in touch over on my website: www.niamhennis.com.  If you're enjoying this series, I'd love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5-star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. You'll find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1    Until next time,  Niamh x

Welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast.    In this week's episode, I'm talking all about CONNECTION, which in my view is a strong contender as THE word of the year!   Undeniably, the events of the past year have changed the way that we live beyond measure. And whether you're fully aware of it or not, 2020 was really all about connection – our connection to friends and family, to strangers, to routine, to structure and everything that up until the last year felt familiar to you.    And at the same time, somewhat paradoxically, it has also been about disconnection. In order to do our bit, we've been asked to stay apart from each other. We've been asked to stay at home and radically change the way we live our lives. As life slowly begins to open back up again, in the aftermath of the last 12 months, many of us are feeling more disconnected than ever from our families, friends, work and communities.    And yet despite the intense hardships and loss, for many, this experience has offered an opportunity to re-connect with ourselves. The enforced lockdown brought with it a natural slow-down and an opportunity to pause, reflect and perhaps even to rebuild our connection with ourselves, which is the most important connection of all. You might have reconnected with some of the things you love to do, that took a backseat to normal, busy everyday life.    If you've followed me for a while, you'll know that I speak about connection a lot in my work – and in this episode, I share more about why this connection with ourselves is so important. I also talk about what it means when we are disconnected, and how to spot the signs that we're not living in full alignment with our true selves.     It's a deep conversation, we cover a lot of ground through the course of the episode so you might even want to come back and listen to this again a few times. I share a lot of my own experiences and beliefs about connection, as well as the times when I've realised I've been living in a state of disconnection. I so hope you find this episode helpful – and if it resonates, I'd love to hear from you. You can find me on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis or get in touch over on my website: www.niamhennis.com.    If you're enjoying this series, I'd love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5 star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people.   Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. You'll find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1    Until next time,    Niamh x

In this next episode, I'm sharing what has been an important realisation for me in recent weeks. I've been opened up to a totally new way of thinking about my health, sparked by a recent discussion series hosted by LiveLine, our national radio here in Ireland. It's been a big learning for me and I'm sharing it with you because I think it holds an important lesson for all of us.    As I shared in my last episode, following the death of both of my parents, I was diagnosed with both type 2 diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis. I've been managing and living with these conditions since then. My mum had diabetes when she was alive and I've always felt a sense of inevitability around being diagnosed with it myself. For a long time, I held the belief that it was hereditary, and I'd simply resigned myself to the fact that I'd just have to learn to live with the symptoms.    Last year, when Covid-19 hit, I realised that now was the time to focus on my health and ensure I was as well and healthy as I could be. With the help of a really excellent hypnotherapist – Dr Niamh Flynn – I was able to make some positive changes and I am delighted to share that I am currently not in the diabetic range.     But as I share in the episode, I've been surprised to realise that some of the issues and symptoms I've been dealing with, and thought were part of my condition, have not gone away. It was only hearing the recent conversation with Joe Duffy on LiveLine that my eyes were opened and I was able to acknowledge that I had been completely ignoring the signs that were there all along…   The body has an excellent way of talking to us – but the question is, are we really listening?    So often, we ignore the obvious signs in front of us, because they don't fit with the particular story that we are telling ourselves. It is my hope that by sharing my own personal health journey with you here in the episode that you can learn from this, and reflect on where you might be ignoring the signs that are in front of you. And that's my TOUGH LOVE ENERGY for you today – DON'T IGNORE THE SIGNS. We all owe it to ourselves to feel as fit, healthy and able as we can. That's my wish for you. Don't suffer in silence.    I so hope you find this episode helpful – and if it resonates, I'd love to hear from you. You can find me on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis or get in touch over on my website: www.niamhennis.com.    If you're enjoying this series, I'd love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5 star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people.   Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. You'll find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1    Until next time,    Niamh x

I'm really excited to share this next episode with you. In this episode of the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast, I'm exploring a much-requested topic for discussion around how to create your own daily practice.    If you've been looking for more information and guidance around how to create a sustainable daily practice that works for you, then look no further. This will be a value-packed episode, so you might want to listen with a pen and paper nearby so you can take notes about the particular things that resonate and inspire you.   As well as information around the ‘how' and the ‘what' of creating a daily practice, I also share with you about the ‘why' – exactly why, I believe, having a consistent daily practice is so important for all of us. Indeed, it's one of the first recommendations I make to my coaching clients – I strongly encourage (and insist!) that they put in place some sort of practice for themselves each day.    What I want you to take away from this episode is that there is no ‘one-size fits all' daily practice. For it to become a consistent and important part of your life, it needs to really feel that it represents who you are. Each of us are different, and so each of us will require something different.    In this episode, I share with you a few of my absolute favourite personal practices, as well as giving you a few other suggestions for things you might wish to explore. My suggestion for anyone looking to create a daily practice is to introduce one thing at a time.    I go deeper into my particular favourite practices, including breathwork, journaling and being in nature. That last one will come as no surprise to you, if you've been following me for a while! I also share my manifestation and visualisation process here – if you struggle to visualise the future in a way that feels real and grounded, this might be helpful for you to try.    For me, creating a daily practice is all about making space. It's my belief that, when we're seeking to make changes in our life, in order to be in the right place to receive those changes we need to create space for them to land first.    As always, there's some TOUGH LOVE ENERGY homework to help give you the motivation to begin. I also propose the best ways to get started with your daily practice. For example, one such suggestion is to begin with just one practice and for only 10 minutes a day.    If you're enjoying this series so far, I'd love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform and if you're on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5 star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people.   If you'd like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1  You'll also find me on Instagram: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis   Until next time,    Niamh x   RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:   For breathwork, I highly recommend Níall Ó Murchú. I came across Níall online, I really resonate with his voice and enjoy his work. You can find him online here: o   https://www.breathewithniall.com/ o   https://www.instagram.com/breathewithniall/ o   https://www.facebook.com/breathewithniall/   FREE JOURNALING PDF If you'd like to begin a journaling practice, I've got a free journaling PDF that you can download here: https://niamhennis.lpages.co/journal-for-greater-clarity. You'll find 30 journaling prompts that you can use to help frame your journaling practice.  For meditation, there are a number of apps you can use to help you such as Headspace, Insight Timer and Calm. I recommend finding a voice that you really resonate with.  o   https://www.headspace.com/ o   https://insighttimer.com/ o   https://www.calm.com/  

Hello and welcome to this week's episode. We're often told that the things that hold us back from making changes or trying new things are our fears, doubts and limiting beliefs. Whilst I'm certainly not going to contradict that, I believe that some of the biggest blocks in our way are also the ones that are most often overlooked. I'm talking here about our personal stories, the stories that we live our lives by. Over time, these are the stories that become such a big and huge part of who we are that often we may not even recognise their existence – nor even more importantly, question their truth. We all have stories – they might be the stories around, why you are the way you are, or stories relating to certain aspects of your life, such as your relationships, friendships, work and / or money. Because stories protect us, they can become like our own personal suit of armour against the world, whether they are actually true or not. In this episode, I share about a particular story which I allowed to envelop me, some years ago. I also provide a few examples of how and where stories may be showing up in your own life, and how these stories could be shaping your beliefs and the way you see the world. Some of your stories may be true, but almost certainly, some of them will be false. What I invite you to consider is that, as our belief systems are rooted in the stories we tell ourselves, it's hugely important to recognise how and where stories are showing up, so that we can look more closely at them and decide whether they are still serving us. And of course, in case you thought you were getting off scott-free,  there's some TOUGH LOVE ENERGY homework here for you in the form of some journaling questions to ask yourself. I think you'll find them really powerful. These are:  1) What do I believe about this situation and how it relates to me? 2) Is it true? 3) Is it really true? 4) If I had no fear of being judged, how would I feel differently? 5) If I believed I was worthy and loveable, how would I show up differently? And what would that feel like? 6) And if I choose to do what I wanted and release my attachment to these stories, what would be different about how I live my life? You will also hear how I did the work to move beyond the stories which were holding me back, so that you can learn to do the same. It IS definitely possible to rewrite your story – I know, because I've done it, and I hope the episode will inspire you to take a look at your own stories and beliefs, so that you might find the courage to make changes of your own. As always, I'd love to hear how this week's episode lands with you. Once you've done the journaling exercise, please do let me know what realisations came up for you. If you're enjoying this series so far, I'd  love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform and if you're on Apple podcasts leave me a 5 start review so that I can help get this information in front of more people. Thank you so much to those of you who have written in so far and shared how much you've been enjoying the podcast – and to those of you who have sent across suggestions for future episodes. I'm already on the case with your ideas!  Until next time,  Niamh x --- If you'd like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1  You'll also find me on Instagram  www.instagram.com/1niamhennis Links for Niamh My website Instagram FREE Facebook Group

This week's podcast feels a little self-indulgent but it is landing on Wednesday May 12th which also happens to be my birthday – the day that marks another 365 days of my personal trip around the sun.  Each year, I like to use this occasion to reflect and look back on what I have achieved in the last 12 months, mostly, because I think we tend to focus more on the things we haven't got round to doing, the things we tried and didn't quite get right, the things we wish we had the courage to do. If we were to begin focusing more on what's good in our lives it will automatically mean that we are spending less time on what's not so good and that in itself has to be a good thing!  So in this week's podcast, I'm sharing my list of the things that I made happen in the last 12 months, not in a ‘aren't I just great?' kind of way, but in a ‘wow the last 12 months has actually been more eventful than I remember'. In keeping with the Tough Love Energy™ feeling, I invite you to do the same.  Why not sit down and list all of the things, big and small, that you feel were achievements, that you are proud of yourself for doing or having or feeling. I honestly bet you that your list will be much longer than you expect it too.  And then why don't we all promise not to leave it for another year to do the same thing again – every 3 months lets commit to checking in with ourselves and seeing just what we have to be grateful for in our lives If there is something you would like me to address in future podcasts please feel free to ask me by emailing me on niamh@niamhennis.com  If you'd like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1  You'll also find me on Instagram  www.instagram.com/1niamhennis Links for Niamh My website Instagram FREE Facebook Group If you believe there's a book inside you then you need to speak with Jessica Killingley. You'll find her on @jessicakillingley on Instagram!

Grief is such a big topic that resonates with us all so differently. Our connection to grief is as unique as our understanding of it and it is definitely a topic I could talk about at length for hours. However, for the purposes of this podcast I've honed on three observations from my own personal experience with grief. 1. With the ‘benefit' of hindsight having lived through loss, what I know for sure is that grief changes you. It totally changed me and the person I am now, speaking to you today, is a direct product of that grief. 2. I also know that as result of my losses I became so terrified of being abandoned again, of isolating others, that I hid how I was really feeling and in so doing became the version of myself I believed others would tolerate. 3. It took me four years (three years longer than it should have) for me to be brave enough to ask for help. I was fortunate after a few false starts to find the incredible professional support of Dr Elizabeth McCrory (www.elizabethmccrory.com) When we start to heal we can often find ourselves trying to find our way back to being the person we were before loss entered our lives. Accepting she has gone is hard. I also know how hard it is when someone you know loses someone and you haven't been through that experience, it's awkward. You're afraid of saying the wrong thing so you probably say nothing. But honestly it's okay to say to someone “I've no idea what you're feeling but I do want to understand it.” Fumbling is better than mumbling! If you have never lost anyone, but know of someone who has, just know that giving them space to talk about their grief, to talk about the person they have lost is the best way you can support them. In this podcast also I share with you the importance of not letting grief consume us or to allowing it to define us. There is no getting over grief, that phrase bothers me, but there is a way forward when the rawness of grief eases where we can begin to put our lives back together. Slowly and at our own pace. Life will never be the same but that doesn't mean life can never be good again. It's okay to see that. Grief Counselling / Therapy – Dr Elizabeth McCrory www.elizabethmccrory.com If this podcast brings up some issues for you and you would like someone to share them with please feel free to email me on niamh@niamhennis.com If you'd like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 You'll also find me on Instagram www.instagram.com/1niamhennis Links for Niamh My website Instagram FREE Facebook Group

There'll be no surprise that this week I'm talking about People Pleasing. It is coming up with all of my clients and in all of your questions. It's hard to ignore right now so I'm tackling it head on. In this podcast I look at just why exploring our people pleasing tendencies is so important and also so helpful. It shows us exactly why putting others first is the proof that we are disconnected from ourselves.  When we become so focused on being there for other we start to forget just what it is that we want, what it is that we like, even who it is that we like. We forget about that part of us that makes us, well, us! Based on my extensive work with hundreds of women, in the last number of years, I present the 4 Types of People Pleasers and I'd really encourage you to see which one of these you are. When we fully understand our people pleasing traits it helps us to be more aware of them and their impact as they occur in our lives.  I also share personal details of my own colourful past with people pleasing! It makes for a little cringing on my part but I also recognise it shows me how far I've come. As is the case with so many, it was when I went through some life changing events that I started to ask the questions about what it was that I wanted and what mattered to me. That was quite a process! But the end result was that I made some big changes, some hard ones, but feel so much more aligned and purposeful now than ever I was. Recognising and changing my people pleasing ways was the start of that process. At the end I suggest some Journaling Prompts to help you find your own answers – this valuable exercise will tell you a lot and show you exactly where the work needs to be done. Trust it and trust yourself. I feel passionate about helping you change your people pleasing ways because when you  do you are declaring yourself ready for change. You are declaring yourself worth of change! That's why I'm pretty sure it's not the last you've heard from me on this subject. When you're finished let me know which category you identified with most. Drop me an email to niamh@niamhennis.com If you'd like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1  You'll also find me on Instagram  www.instagram.com/1niamhennis Here are the highlights from the episode 1:11 How we know we are suffering from the disease to please. 1:42 What ‘s the definition of a people pleaser? 3:56 The OG People Pleaser 4:53 The Smoothie 5:32 The Pretender 6:53 The Support Act 8:32 My Time as a People Pleaser 11:47 How to change your people pleasing ways 12:08 Practical next steps 15:06 Your Homework Links for Niamh My website Instagram FREE Facebook Group

I'm not sure anyone reads these notes, but if you do, can I just tell you that my aim is that in this series you hear what you need to not what you want! There are enough people out there doing that, so you have been warned! Kicking off this first episode of TOUGH LOVE ENERGY ™ PODCAST it's impossible to ignore the global pandemic, but here we look at the impact that this shared and collective anxiety is having on us all and just how it is leaving us feeling a little more isolated and a lot more disconnected. I'm hoping this podcast series will therefore make you feel heard and give you somewhere safe to come where we will discuss topics that we are all struggling with. I start this episode by setting my intention for the series, always important to do! Without wanting to assume anything, I give you a little bit of background information on who I am and what I do, for context. Then we dive straight into the difference between Change and Transformation and just what it means for each of us.  In acknowledging that world events have the power to change everything I'm using this time to talk about all of the many things we can control. We can control how we react, how we feel and who we show up as.  Then as I move into my Tough Love Energy Mode ™, I'll show you how we are all hiding behind being busy and using the distractions of everyday life to avoid dealing with what's right in front of us, and inside us. But no more! I ask you, is it not better that you discover exactly what you're afraid of so that you can transform it? I also ask are you prepared to stop making excuses, saying you've no time, blaming others and not accepting responsibility for what's happening in your life, right now? It's your choice. It's always your choice.  Finally, we look at just what happens when we disconnect from ourselves, and how easily it happens without us even knowing it.  I couldn't talk about this subject and not mention my online workshop RECONNECT – Detox from your People Pleasing Ways on April 12th from the safety and comfort of your own home. To secure your place and discover more about what to expect just follow this link https://niamhennis.lpages.co/reconnect Highlights  2:44 Setting my intention for this podcast series, 4:51 Explaining the difference between Change & Transformation, 6:42 Reminding you that you are not in control of anything but yourself. 7:28 You're hiding behind being busy. 10:55 Stop making your crazy excuses. 13:08 It's time for you to reconnect with yourself so that you can bridge the gap of how you show up versus who you really are. 15:54 RECONNECT Workshop – Detox your People Pleasing Ways 17:03 It's your choice. Stay stuck or move past it. 17.40 Do 2 small things to move you forward. RECONNECT – Detox from your People Pleasing Ways https://niamhennis.lpages.co/reconnect Links for Niamh My website Instagram FREE Facebook Group

Welcome to Tough Love Energy the podcast where Transformation Coach and Writer, Niamh Ennis, shares with you the tools you need to transform that part of your life that you know is making you miserable. Working through a variety of topics you'll leave each podcast feeling like you've had your very own 1:1 Coaching session with Niamh along with the practical next steps required to keep the momentum going! Be prepared to hear not what you want but always what you need!