Cautious Optimism: An Infertility Podcast

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Welcome to Cautious Optimism: An Infertility Podcast. We are three friends eternally bonded by our individual heartaches with infertility. Join us as we discuss the ups and downs that often accompany the road to parenthood. Here’s to hoping for the best a

Karly, Chelsey and Karin


    • Aug 18, 2024 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 43m AVG DURATION
    • 42 EPISODES

    Ivy Insights

    The Cautious Optimism: An Infertility Podcast is an exceptional podcast for anyone struggling with infertility. The hosts and guests do a phenomenal job of diving into the complex emotions and thoughts surrounding infertility without shying away from the difficult topics. At the same time, they offer a sense of hope and strength that is both comforting and empowering. I personally binge-listened to all the episodes within a few weeks and I am eagerly awaiting new episodes. The vulnerability and openness displayed by these incredible women in sharing their stories is truly commendable.

    One of the best aspects of this podcast is the diverse perspectives offered by the three hosts. Each host has taken a different path on their journey to overcome infertility, which allows listeners to connect with one or more of them on a personal level. Their unwavering focus on faith and God throughout their experiences provides a source of hope even during the darkest days. The wisdom shared by these women is not only inspiring but also serves as a guiding light for others navigating through infertility.

    Unfortunately, it is challenging to identify any significant drawbacks to this podcast. Perhaps some listeners may have appreciated more episodes focusing on specific topics related to infertility or interviews with experts in the field. However, considering that this podcast primarily centers around personal stories and experiences, it successfully accomplishes its intended purpose.

    In conclusion, The Cautious Optimism: An Infertility Podcast is an invaluable resource for individuals grappling with infertility. Listening to each episode feels like being embraced by a community of women who understand the pain, struggles, and courage required on this journey. Through tears, laughter, and newfound knowledge, this podcast creates a space where women support women wholeheartedly. It offers hope to those yearning for motherhood while offering profound insights into the complexities of fertility challenges.



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    Latest episodes from Cautious Optimism: An Infertility Podcast

    The One Where Clinging To Hope Is All We Have: Anna Dalton

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 18, 2024 87:51


    Meeting Anna at a random girl's night last month couldn't have been a bigger blessing-there's nothing more special than connecting with a friend who knows the path of infertility and can relate to all the different ups and downs that go with it! And we are so grateful she was willing to share her story with us on the podcast! Anna shares about her experience with endometriosis and how that changed everything for her when she had to envision her path to becoming a mom and let go of expectations she had once had. She tells us of her experiences with IVF and her embryo transfers that ultimately brought her her two beautiful daughters today. Despite the let downs and often heartbreaking outcomes she has experienced, Anna has such an amazing perspective of "clinging to hope" and to those tangible blessings she sees in her life each day when things don't always go the way she hoped/planned. So lucky to get to share her story with all of you!

    The One Where "Patience Has Her Perfect Place" In Our Becoming

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 17, 2023 63:54


    A long awaited reunion episode is here! The three of us are back together  to share a vulnerable and special conversation going through life's updates over the past year. Although we are each on such different paths of grief, joy, struggle and growth we can all find common ground in that there are good things to hope for ahead. Thanks for listening, we love you and see you wherever you are in you own journey right now. 

    The One With A Nudge In a Different Direction: Diondra Terry

    Play Episode Play 44 sec Highlight Listen Later Nov 1, 2023 45:31


    So happy to be back and to have a new episode to share with you all with our friend Diondra Terry! Diondra is no stranger to the struggles of infertility and has experienced so many different challenges along the way to creating her family. She shares with us her experiences of being nudged onto the path of adoption which brought her both of her beautiful daughters but also struggling to understand two heartbreaking miscarriages in between. Later, she and her husband chose to go down the fostering route and have been blessed to have the joy of a little boy in their home. Diondra is the ultimate example of embracing a story that is so unexpected but at the same time filled with so much joy "in the meanwhile"! 

    The One Where A Step Forward Is Better Than Standing Still: Brighton Capua

    Play Episode Play 37 sec Highlight Listen Later Jan 29, 2023 57:28


    We are back in a new year with a new episode and we are so excited to share this one! Mental health is something we have always wanted to talk about more on this podcast and we couldn't be more grateful to have our friend Brighton Capua share her story with us. Brighton shares with us her experiences with OCD and how the last few years the mountains of anguish and pain she has been faced with have felt insurmountable.  She shares how her expectations of motherhood the second time around were not what she had hoped and how she was able to overcome some of the most difficult times in her life . Her mindset of "Function over Feeling" is one that can be adapted to so many hard life situations especially the difficulties of infertility. We are so grateful to Brighton for her vulnerability and courage to share her heart with us!

    The One Where The Embryo Just Wouldn't Stick: Paige Devey

    Play Episode Play 41 sec Highlight Listen Later Oct 10, 2022 49:03


    We are so happy to have Paige on this week to share her experience with infertility with us! Paige's path led her to jump right into IVF which was followed by some devastating unsuccessful transfers. After further testing and learning of a new diagnosis, Paige and her husband were able to move forward with a third FET and bring their beautiful baby girl into the world. Paige shares about the different challenges along the way as well as some of the struggles that have come with becoming a new mom as well. Overall, Paige's story is a reminder that life typically doesn't go according to our own plans but that there is always room for hope and "cautious optimism" in the difficult moments. 

    The One Where Living In The Present Is All That Matters

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 7, 2022 24:32


    We have been absent way too long and are happy to be back together with an episode for you all after a few months off!This episode Karly shares about her miracle baby boy Hayes who arrived back in October 2021. Gratitude and happiness are the standout emotions after many years of hoping to become a mother but there have been some tough moments along the way as well. Some of those being adjusting to the new role of motherhood when it felt so distant for so long, feelings of guilt when things are hard, and also struggling to find the balance of feeling all the joy and also making room for the sad/hard emotions as well. Karly shares how she is just learning to live in the present joy and not take one moment for granted because we never know what tomorrow could bring. All in all, we are so thankful for this community as it has supported each of us and given us strength through our hardest moments. We hope and pray we can continue to celebrate your wins with you and cry with you and love you through your hard times. We love you!

    The One Where With Time, The Answers Will Shine: Sarah Larson

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2022 38:48


    We are so blessed to hear from Sarah Larson on our episode this week! Sarah has experienced parenthood in ways she never expected but it has turned out to be such an immense blessing that has also been accompanied by unexpected challenges in her life. Sarah shares with us her experiences as a young mother, then facing infertility for many years and then the miraculous path that led her and her husband to adopt 4 of their 5 children. Sarah's faith and perspective shine through as she shares how she has found the joy through hard moments and learned that all things are for our good and to help us grow into who we are meant to be. 

    The One Where Empathy Is Earned: Michelle Larson

    Play Episode Play 52 sec Highlight Listen Later Mar 6, 2022 59:17


    In this episode we hear from our wonderful friend Michelle Larson about her unique experiences with motherhood. She shares with us the miraculous birth and life of her sweet daughter Rose and how she has conquered so much in her short 5 years on this earth. Michelle shares her perspective as she has experienced new, unexpected challenges these past few years while trying to get pregnant and add to her family and how she has gained an empathy that has blessed her life in new ways. Michelle is such an example to us of faith and gratitude no matter life's circumstances! We are so thankful to her for taking time to share her heart with all of us!

    The One With The Crash Course In Grief: Anne Rowley

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 6, 2022 58:28


    On this episode we talked with Anne Rowley a friend of the podcast. She shares her experiences as she has learned to walk  paths she never anticipated and how she has found strength in vulnerability. Loss and grief can be so isolating and Anne opens up about how opening up and sharing with others can be a launchpad for connection. She discusses how she found strength through her faith and how God is with us in the “fire”.  Anne is a great example of living with Cautious Optimism and we are so grateful for her willingness to come on and have this conversation. 

    The One With The "Pinch Me" Moments: Ariana Harris

    Play Episode Play 57 sec Highlight Listen Later Dec 19, 2021 45:08


    Today we have a new episode of the Cautious Optimism podcast. We have our friend Ariana as a guest today sharing her amazing story of her path and journey to motherhood. Ariana shares her experience of having to shift expectations early on in with fertility treatments. Ariana talks about how she held on to the moments and the people in her life that brought her joy and gratitude in the moments that felt darkest. She dives into her experience with her latest pregnancy and how some unexpected findings lead to a whole different road to navigate. Ariana also discussed how she was also involved in the local infertility resource group and was able help others navigate their own experiences and find a sense of community through this world.

    The One Where There Is Happiness Through The Hard: Cicily Oldham

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 24, 2021 42:07


    We are so grateful to have Cicily Oldham as a guest this week! Cicily and her husband Dave are no strangers to the world of infertility and spent ten years trying and trying to grow their family. After they welcomed their son here naturally they never imagined the road that would lie ahead for them to get their second child and miracle daughter here. Cicily shares the countless embryo transfers and retrievals she experienced and how she never gave up despite the hard realities she faced each time they were met with disappointment. Cicily's story is one of unrelenting perseverance and faith! She is a wonderful example of finding joy in the journey and remaining happy and optimistic through the hard trials life brings. 

    The One With Karly's Updates

    Play Episode Play 45 sec Highlight Listen Later Oct 10, 2021 37:02


    Last but not least we finally get to hear updates from Karly! In Karly's story that she shared a full year ago we learned of the intimate details of how she and her husband Jordan were dealing with the aftermath of yet another heart breaking loss and learning to really be ok with not knowing their next step. Time and time again they have chosen to put their faith to action and believe that all of these disappointments could be made for their good. Karly has had a lot of decisions to make from where we left off in her story. Would she try IVF AGAIN, follow Chelsey's example through adoption, foster care, find a gestational carrier, or look into an egg donor??? The options and roads seemed overwhelmingly unlimited and complicated, but through all the noise Karly was inspired to try an option that did NOT seem like the obvious or even practical choice. Tune in to hear what things Karly has since pursued and how that has brought miracles and new trials that she never even imagined to be possible for her. 

    The One With Chelsey's Updates

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 26, 2021 37:15


    We are so excited to catch up with Chelsey this week! It's amazing all the miraculous things that can occur in just a year's time. Chelsey shares with us about her beautiful baby girl Arlo as well as how her relationship with her has differed from her special bond with her son Oliver. We also get to hear all about the miraculous progress Oliver has made with his development in the last few months. Chelsey talks about how her perspective has been broadened as she has become a mother herself while simultaneously staying in contact with Oliver's birth mother. We also get to hear how the relationship she shares with her first foster baby's parents has changed in the best way over the last year. We are so inspired by Chelsey's strength and courage as she as endured many ups and downs to get where she and her family are today. 

    The One With Karin's Updates

    Play Episode Play 47 sec Highlight Listen Later Sep 5, 2021 27:24


    We can hardly believe that The Cautious Optimism  Podcast is coming up on a year anniversary from its launch date! We've never wanted this podcast to be all about our stories, but a lot has happened in each of our lives this past year and we figured after our summer break that this would be a perfect opportunity to share some life updates.  This week we are starting out with an update on Karin's story. Karin's last episode ended with how she would never stop fighting for her family as she continued to experience  one unexplained miscarriage after another. On today's episode, Karin shares some of her highs and lows of this past year and what that fight for her family currently looks like today. We are so grateful for the opportunity to share the good and bad parts of our experiences with this community and hope that this happy update will bring some extra hope wherever you may be. Thank you for letting us share in both your joy and struggle as we try to practice our own Cautious Optimism. 

    The One With The Infertility Brain

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 16, 2021 24:53


    HI FRIENDS, we are back and have missed sharing and connecting with you as we've taken a little break over the summer.  Today, Karly, Chelsey & Karin talk about something they call "Infertility Brain".  We hope this is a positive conversation that provides some comfort to those who may feel alone in their "Infertility Brain," which we believe is a common side effect from enduring the hard road through Infertility as well as life after.  Tune in to hear how we have each been affected by this, and some ways we try to make it work for our good.  Thank you for being here with us, we appreciate you!

    The One When There Is Nothing Wrong With Wanting More: Mattie Larsen

    Play Episode Play 40 sec Highlight Listen Later Aug 1, 2021 47:28


    We are back this week with our guest Mattie Larsen. Mattie is no stranger to all things infertility. She was met with challenges to get pregnant from the start which ultimately led her and her husband to explore IVF. Although it wasn't the smoothest road, it did lead them to having their miracle little boy Channing. Since having their son things have not been easy as they have tried to grow their family again and been met with multiple ectopic pregnancies, miscarriages and understandable grief/frustration. Mattie shares how she has had to make impactful, big decisions on her journey and how ultimately she knows they are leading her to her ultimate goal of never giving up on growing her family.

    The One With Lessons Of The Heart: Anna Chitty Part Two

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 23, 2021 49:42


    Today is part 2 of our interview with Anna Chitty.  Anna shares some memories that brought some light during Desi's hospital stay. She details the events leading up to Desi's passing and the heartbreak that follows when losing a child. She also opens up about her family's special connection to Desi still and some special moments when Desi has found a way to say hello and let them know he is ok. Finding a way to be a family always and forever. You will not want to miss the rest of this special interview. Again we thank Anna for being willing to sit down with us and share these very intimate and special experiences she has had with lessons of the heart. 

    The One With Lessons Of The Heart: Anna Chitty Part One

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2021 63:23


    This week we are grateful to our guest Anna Chitty for sharing her story. Anna is a friend of the podcast and her experience with loss, unmet expectations and trying to live life through the unimaginable is one we know so many will connect with. Anna's son Desmond was born with a congenital heart defect known as hypoplastic left heart syndrome. She shares how her family navigated this incredibly difficult experience and how Desi left an incredible impact on so many people.

    The One With The Infertility Learning Curve: Kelsey Filewicz

    Play Episode Listen Later May 30, 2021 41:52


    Today we are incredibly lucky to share our very first interview with a PODCAST LISTENER! We connected with the amazing Kelsey Filewicz through social media thanks to our platform with the Cautious Optimism Podcast that brought us all together with our shared experiences through infertility, loss, and disappointment.   One of our biggest motivations for starting and continuing this podcast is to create a community for those who feel so alone or unseen through these heaviest parts of our lives.  It has been the greatest surprise and reward to hear from so many of our listeners who message in their thoughts & feelings on how they receive each episode as well as suggestions, questions, and incredible advice as we try to do our best in providing Cautiously Optimistic messages for all of our listeners.  We are so grateful for Kelsey's generous heart and noble motivation in sharing her story with all of us in the hopes to help others feel more prepared through infertility.  Thank you Kelsey for teaching us how to enjoy and celebrate life through the hard as well as opening our eyes to the further opportunities for connection here on the Cautious Optimism Podcast.  We hope to continue to hear from all of our listeners as we cherish your wisdom, stories, and share more from our listeners in future episodes.  Thank you for being here, we appreciate you!

    The One With The Trip To Holland: Michelle Burton

    Play Episode Play 15 sec Highlight Listen Later May 16, 2021 61:21


    We are so excited to share this interview this week! Karly sits down with Chelsey and her gestational carrier (surrogate) Michelle Burton to discuss the amazing experiences these two have undergone over the last year. Michelle shares her amazing perspective she was able to have while carrying Chelsey's baby girl and how it has been something she has always wanted to do.  We discuss the relationship that these two ultimate strangers had to develop and work on to make this journey no doubt one of the most meaningful of both of their lives. Tune in to hear the most amazing story with so many miracles along the way that ultimately brought baby Arlo into the world. 

    trip holland michelle burton
    The One Where We Celebrate You Wherever You Are On Mother's Day

    Play Episode Listen Later May 9, 2021 23:32


    Karly, Chelsey & Karin are together again on today's episode to talk about the sometimes very difficult emotions that can accompany Mother's Day.  We want you to know that wherever you find yourself today that we love you, see you, and validate your joy or pain. We love and appreciate you all! "Don't let sadness obscure the view.  Your covenants have already paved your path.  Keep going.  You are doing better than you know. I think the Lord would throw His arms around us and let us know we are worthy enough to keep going and our sacrifices have been acceptable before Him.  He would tell us He is reserving for us all that is in our hearts, unspoken things that only He could know. He would say that He sees us and all we do behind the scenes, that we are not invisible to Him.  He would ask of us the same thing He asked Peter: "Lovest though me?...then feed my sheep".  (John 21:15-17)-Sharon Eubank

    The One Where A Body Can Overcome The Impossible: Becky Freestone

    Play Episode Play 37 sec Highlight Listen Later Apr 18, 2021 51:26


    We are so thankful and excited to have Becky Freestone on to share her story with us this week! Not only is Becky a cherished friend and neighbor but also an infertility warrior in every way. Her story is incredible and at times unbelievable of how her four miracles came to her and made her a mother. She has persevered through infertility on top of battling an eating disorder for many years. She now uses her own experiences with recovery and tools she has learned to help others who are struggling with eating disorders by providing virtual coaching online. Her story is one not to miss and will leave you feeling inspired and strengthened to conquer the unimaginable trials our bodies sometimes have to face. 

    The One From An Ultrasonographer's Perspective: Kari Wood

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2021 24:00


    In this episode we are joined by an incredible  Ultrasonographer, educator, and dear friend Kari Wood.  Kari has over 10 years of experience in this industry and has a unique perspective into the challenges of those struggling with infertility as she has provided such a crucial service at sometimes the most pivotal moments of someone's journey through infertility time and time again. Kari shares the struggle of her profession as she may need to go from one minute giving a patient  the worst news of their life to the next minute giving another patient the best news of their life.  We gained so much more appreciation for our ultrasonography technicians as Kari explains the complicated variables of the job. We are so grateful to her and her mission to create a curriculum for her students on how to better treat patients going through infertility with an appropriate balance between professionalism and empathy.  Thank you Kari sharing your wisdom, compassion,  and allowing us the opportunity to share our own experiences with your students.  We hope ALL educators share your same passion and desires!

    The One When Grief Knows Grief: Oakley Peterson

    Play Episode Play 15 sec Highlight Listen Later Mar 28, 2021 49:53


    We are back this week with an incredible interview with Oakley Peterson @nothingdownaboutit.   Oakley is a Northern California girl who has embraced Utah as her home after marrying her husband Scott 12 years ago.  Oakley describes herself as an advocate, family girl, ex girl band bass player, and just a mom who loves to get loud about the things she is passionate about.  Oakley is a source of light and joy to those who know her both personally and to the hundreds of thousands who follow her lead in the online community that she established in 2013 called @nothingdownaboutit , the happiest and most inclusive place to celebrate "Up Syndrome" .  Since starting this podcast we have wanted the opportunity to hear and learn from Oakley as she has such an incredible gift for sharing her personal experiences with grief and loss through motherhood that create a safe place for such needed connection.  She and her family so beautifully demonstrate how to live Cautiously Optimistic by "letting life surprise them" as they navigate the sometimes complicated but always colorful road of life.  Thank you Oakley for sharing your time and heart with us, we simply adore you.  

    The One Where With Failed Expectations Comes Personal Growth

    Play Episode Play 40 sec Highlight Listen Later Mar 14, 2021 35:00


    Karly, Chelsey, and Karin are excited to be back together again in person on today's episode.  They catch up on what is going on in their lives including Karly's BIG 30th Birthday this Monday March 15th.  With all the fun plans to celebrate this big milestone in Karly's life also comes the conversation of how to handle occasions, celebrations, holidays, or milestones in life that are met with failed expectations. Karly opens the conversation with how this approaching birthday has been hard with the reminder that her family does not look the way she expected it to at the age of 30 and what she does to combat those feelings of disappointment and grief.  Chelsey & Karin also talk about facing unmet expectations in their lives and acknowledge that EVERYONE has or will experience this in their own way. Tune in to hear some of their ideas on what has helped them to work through those difficult emotions & days and to shift their focus on their accomplishments and potential rather than their failures and unmet expectations. 

    The One With Some Suggestions: Self Care Isn't Selfish

    Play Episode Play 60 sec Highlight Listen Later Feb 28, 2021 36:36


    This week we discuss the importance of self care when dealing with difficult trials such as infertility. Not only is there a physical aspect to the ups and downs of trying to conceive but the mental stress and turmoil is also ever present. We each highlight the different ways we have personally struggled with not implementing great self care as well as sharing things that have helped us to show ourselves some love while going through these challenges. Mindfulness, therapy, exercise and talking things through with someone you trust are some of the techniques we have found helpful in our experiences. Let's not forget retail therapy! Ultimately, self care is not selfish and there is more that defines us than our infertility even if at times we forget this important truth. We share some thoughts from a wonderful book in this episode and highly recommend it for anyone searching for some useful tools while dealing with infertility: Conquering Infertility by Alice Domar

    The One From A Fertility Nurse's Perspective: Lisa Henderson

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 21, 2021 38:06


    In today's episode of the Cautious Optimism Podcast Chelsey & Karly interview the amazing Lisa Henderson, a nurse who provides us with so much knowledge, experience, and perspective from working in an infertility clinic. Lisa has been an incredible resource and friend to us through our experiences of infertility and we are so grateful to her for being here with us today.  We learn how Lisa's career lead her to an infertility clinic and why a piece of her heart will always remain there.  Being an IVF nurse comes with many responsibilities and challenges as you try to care for and support your patients through their entire  process through the Infertility Clinic.   Lisa opens up about the low's, high's, and complexities of her career as one minute she would make a call to a patient to deliver the worst news of their life to 5 minutes later calling a patient to deliver the best news of their life.  Lisa sometimes wishes she was also equipped with a degree in counseling to provide further support for her patients through the roller coaster of infertility .  Ultimately Lisa believes that living a life of Cautious Optimism means having the courage to continue towards your goals with a head held high doing the best that you can with what you have been given.  

    nurses fertility ivf lisa henderson infertility clinic
    The One Where Trials Bring Deep Gratitude And Big Miracles: Jenny Hunter

    Play Episode Play 15 sec Highlight Listen Later Feb 14, 2021 37:05


    We are so thrilled to have the inspiring Jenny Hunter with us on this week's episode. When we  were brainstorming in the very beginning of this podcast on who we would like to interview, we all individually thought of this amazing woman because she has touched all of our lives with her light and love! We are so fortunate to have Jenny as one of our neighbors and a fellow member of our religion, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  Jenny is a devoted wife and mother to 5 adorable children all under the age of eight!  From the outside looking in at Jenny and her adorable family you would never guess that she knows the heartbreak of  infertility, we are so grateful for the unique perspective she gives us as she shares such precious pieces of her life.  Jenny lets us in on the difficulty of not only getting pregnant with her children, but the extreme difficulties that followed through pregnancy and a very unexpected diagnosis.  Jenny has a gift to find and focus on the light through the darkness and to recognize the tremendous miracles that have transpired in her experiences with motherhood.   We can't wait for you all to love Jenny as much as we do!

    The One With Karin And Stephen

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 7, 2021 37:52


    We end our couple interview's with Karin and Stephen this week!  Karin and Stephen just got back from a long anticipated family vacation, so this episode sounds a little different than others because it was recorded via Zoom. Through their trial of recurrent miscarriages Stephen and Karin have realized the importance of communication with one another but also with those closest to them, Stephen opens up about how he has learned to better communicate what is going on in their lives to his family so they can be allowed to be there in both the high and the low moments.  They connect over their shared  faith in eternal families that helps them find purpose in their losses and work towards the day that they will be reunited with all of their babies.  Tune in to hear Karin and Stephen  disclose what has been the hardest, funniest, and most helpful in their experiences with grief and loss.  They remind us to not let life pass us by, to focus on the things we "can" do and understand that each emotion and situation we endure is not forever.  Thank you Karin & Stephen for wrapping up this last couple's interview for our awesome Cautious Optimism Community!

    The One With Karly And Jordan

    Play Episode Play 28 sec Highlight Listen Later Jan 31, 2021 33:19


    This week we continue with our mini couples interviews with our amazing Karly and Jordan. Their faith and hope is tangible as they answer each question and unknown with the deepest of Cautious Optimism! Together they work on seeing things from an eternal perspective and practice vulnerability as they share their true emotions and fears with one another and loved ones. Tune in to hear the intimate details  of their experiences together as they have learned to laugh, cry, and look for the evidences of God's love in the details of their waiting and actions of faith. Thank you Karly and Jordan, God truly is the Gardener tending to all your blessings. 

    The One With Chelsey And James

    Play Episode Play 58 sec Highlight Listen Later Jan 24, 2021 22:13


    Today's mini episode features an intimate interview with our lovely Chelsey and James Vreeken! They get personal with the  honest truth of marital challenges that are commonly present when the road to parenthood is longer than expected.  We get their advice on how to work through  feelings of failure and blame connected to infertility  together as a couple.  We highlight the parts of their relationship that are most affected by this trial and how couple's therapy combined with individual therapy has  helped them to navigate and process the stresses of this journey.  James and Chelsey choose to invest in their relationship in creative ways by finding individual hobbies that bring purpose and joy in face of the heavy identity that infertility can bring.  We admire their sacrificial teamwork that has helped them to find answers for their family as well as their beautiful ability to laugh at the comical and  unbelievable situations that this topic brings to our marriages. 

    The One Where The Husbands Tell All

    Play Episode Play 33 sec Highlight Listen Later Jan 17, 2021 35:44


    Welcome to our first guests...our Husbands! We are so grateful they are willing to share their perspectives and thoughts on all things infertility. This week we hear from Jordan, Stephen and James as they discuss the varying emotions that accompany infertility. They share the heartbreak of watching the woman you love endure the unimaginable, as well as the complicated emotions that we all experience. Ultimately, they conclude that the desire to be a father drives their commitment to never giving up and finding cautious optimism through it all. 

    The One Where Hope Is Not Lost (Karin's Story Part 2)

    Play Episode Play 43 sec Highlight Listen Later Jan 10, 2021 56:06


    This week we continue to learn more about Karin's story. She shares about the trauma and heartbreak that came as she encountered loss after loss and the hopelessness that followed. The complete loss of control, fears and endless questions that enveloped her in this time of her life helped her to turn to God in the most personal way and she relied on her faith more than ever before.  Karin shares that even though there are dark moments in this struggle, HOPE IS NOT LOST. Her son Leon is the miracle that she never dreamed could ever, would ever become her reality. Karin shares that despite all the pain, suffering and grief that leaves a lasting scar, she will never, ever give up or stop trying to grow her family.

    The One When All The Lights Went Out (Karin's Story Part 1)

    Play Episode Play 58 sec Highlight Listen Later Jan 3, 2021 48:36


    Our next two episodes we are honored to hear from Karin as she shares her story. We are so grateful to have a perspective different than what our listeners have heard thus far and we know so many will relate to her story. For Karin and Stephen, getting pregnant has never been the problem...It is, unfortunately, the staying pregnant part. Karin shares the heartbreaking details of her first experience with pregnancy/motherhood as one that has left her "forever changed". It was an experience that went in an unexpected yet all too common direction for many women who have suffered loss. Karin has persevered through not just one, but six losses over the past few years. Karin exudes faith, love and is an example to all of never giving up and to never stop trying-even when "waiting is the hardest part". 

    The One With Some Suggestions: How to Support a Friend Going Through Infertility

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 13, 2020 21:07


    One question we have all been asked is "What can I do to support/help you?" and we wish we knew the answer for each and every person who has/is struggling with infertility. Unfortunately, the answer is different for everyone-and sometimes we don't know the answer. However, what we can share are ways we have felt loved, supported and carried through our hard moments. In this episode, we each share some ideas of how to be there for those around you who are living in a space of struggling to become a mother. We each are so thankful for the support we have felt from family, friends and one another during the tough moments this life has to offer. These suggestions are not going to work for everyone but we hope they give you some insight into how to love and support those around you going through infertility. "Doing something is better than doing nothing."

    The One Where We Talk About The Holidays

    Play Episode Play 41 sec Highlight Listen Later Dec 6, 2020 47:11


    It's the most wonderful time of the year! But at times it can be the most difficult time of the year when dealing with a broad spectrum of all different kinds of grief. In this episode, we discuss how we have strived to stay cautiously optimistic during the holidays as well as how others have done the same  through various challenges.  Listeners submitted answers to the question: How do you find cautious optimism when dealing with personal grief and pain during the holiday season? We share some of the inspiring messages and discuss how we can all find the gratitude and joy during this festive time of year even when it is not easy to do so. "The work of the mature person is to carry grief in one hand and gratitude in the other and to be stretched large by them. How much sorrow can I hold? That's how much gratitude I can give. If I carry only grief, I'll bend toward cynicism and despair. If I have only gratitude, I'll become saccharine and won't develop much compassion for other people's suffering. Grief keeps the heart fluid and soft, which helps make compassion possible. " -Francis Ward Weller

    The One Where Love Always Heals (Chelsey's Story Part 2)

    Play Episode Play 54 sec Highlight Listen Later Nov 29, 2020 41:34


    In this episode Chelsey continues her story of becoming a mother to her son Oliver. Chelsey and her husband James loved this little boy from the first time they set their eyes on him. Chelsey shares how she has experienced the reality that love heals all as she has watched her little boy conquer more than anyone thought he could. Though the road to being a mother was not easy by any means for Chelsey, it is nothing short of miraculous. 

    The One When One Door Closes Another Opens (Chelsey's Story Part 1)

    Play Episode Play 45 sec Highlight Listen Later Nov 22, 2020 37:45


    This week we hear from Chelsey as she fills us in on her story to become a Mom. Chelsey talks about her experience with IVF and how she felt she needed to try something totally different after multiple tries and no success. She shares about the pivotal moment when she and her husband James decided to pursue foster care which led them to their son Max. Chelsey shares how this was one of the most amazing and also most heartbreaking times in her life. Though things did not work out as they had prayed for and hoped for with their first foster son Max, Chelsey and James were prepared for an incredible journey to foster and ultimately adopt their son Oliver. Chelsey has always had more room in her heart than can be measured and her story of love without limits is proof of the amazing woman and mother she is!

    The One With The Déjà Vu (Karly's Story Part 2)

    Play Episode Play 60 sec Highlight Listen Later Nov 15, 2020 48:15


    In this week's episode we hear from Karly as she fills us in on the rest of her infertility journey up to today. She shares about the second, and third rounds of IVF that she endured and the outcomes that followed. Despite the challenges life seems to throw at us, Karly shares how she strives to always find something to be grateful for: supportive friends and family, a cute dog Sox, her faith and the future. Being cautiously optimistic sometimes means being okay with not knowing what comes next-or when that next step comes. It is so very true in life that "Hard is the constant...the variable is our reaction to the hard." -Stanley G. Ellis

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    The One Where IVF Didn't Work (Karly's Story Part 1)

    Play Episode Play 32 sec Highlight Listen Later Nov 8, 2020 38:03


    This week we hear from Karly as she shares part one of her five year struggle with infertility. We will learn some of the early methods Karly and her husband Jordan tried to grow their family from when they first saw an OB to the intense process of IVF that they eventually were led to try two years later. We discuss some of the raw, emotional, and difficult moments that infertility often brings month after month-treatment after treatment. Karly shares how grateful she is for the opportunity to pursue IVF and for the support she has had and continues to rely on through this time in her life. We hope that this podcast/episode can be just that for someone/anyone who may be experiencing or going through something similar. 

    The One Where We Talk About IVF

    Play Episode Play 60 sec Highlight Listen Later Oct 31, 2020 64:04


    In this episode we (Chelsey and Karly) talk candidly about our experiences with IVF.  We discuss some of the treatments we experienced at the beginning of our journeys to get pregnant (oral medications and IUI) and then go on to explain the step by step process of IVF. From the initial appointment to the frozen embryo transfer we share how we felt during this process and leave you with the general knowledge you need to know about what IVF is and how it all goes down. Whether this is to prepare yourself for your own experience with IVF or to understand what your friends/loved ones may experience in this process, we hope this leaves you with a better understanding of how IVF works and what it entails. 

    The One Where We Introduce Ourselves

    Play Episode Play 26 sec Highlight Listen Later Oct 30, 2020 29:55


    Welcome to Cautious Optimism, an infertility podcast. In this introductory episode you will meet us, your hosts, Karly, Chelsey and Karin! We are three friends who have all walked down different, yet similar, roads of infertility and have found a special bond by supporting each other and leaning on one another through the ups and downs on the path to parenthood. You will learn a little bit about each of us, how we met, and our "why" behind this podcast. We are so excited and grateful that you are here!

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