Zach & Melissa Go to the Movies

Well, it’s that time again. We’re unleashing our second installment in our 10-second-car ride through the Fast and the Furious world. Next stop is the second movie released, but not the second movie in terms of the chronology. Honestly, why did they need to have a prequel in this series? Alas, that does not matter. So, […]

Melissa and I never got swept up by The Fast and the Furious. In fact, we had seen none of the movies in the franchise before watching this one. Alas, we have endeavored to watch every movie in the franchise and discuss them. The Fast and the Furious really reminded me of another infiltration movie that had […]

This movie…woof. Friday the 13th: Part VIII, Jason Takes Manhattan is not one of the better movies we’ve watched. Is it the worst Friday the 13th we’ve covered thus far, though? Well, you’ll have to give it a listen to find-out. The usual language advisory is in effect. Enjoy!

Greetings! We are back after a bit of a break. Our breaks are never really planned, but life (aka our daughters) sometimes makes us take breaks. At any rate, we wanted to post an episode for Halloween. Halloween III: Season of the Witch is an interesting movie, to say the least. Long considered the black […]

This is ain’t your grandfather’s American Werewolf. Lol! And it sure as hell shows. It’s pretty impressive when IMDB categorizes a movie as a “Horror/Fantasy/Comedy/Thriller” and it checks off none of those boxes. Alas, we sat through it and decided to discuss it. We hope you enjoy hearing us sink our teeth into An American Werewolf in […]

Roland Emmerich has wrought a lot of horrible things, but Universal Soldier (1992) isn’t the worst of those things. Doesn’t necessarily mean it’s good, but it’s definitely not horrible. Alas, we had plenty to talk about in this episode. Lots of conjecture. We did use some language on this one. It would probably be safe to […]

Time to unleash another Friday the 13th episode. This time we have Part VI: Jason Lives. Pretty sure this has been mentioned before, but Zach was a big fan of this franchise at the start of this journey. That love has faded very quickly. Things really change when you actually have to pay attention. You can safely assume […]

Top Dog is probably the worst thing Chuck Norris has ever done. I feel like that’s a really bold statement when you consider how many bad movies he has been in. Alas, it has to be true. Despite the crap, we had a lot of fun talking about this one. Maybe Zach’s favorite episode ever. […]

We really liked Godzilla (2014); would that hold true for the newest installment in the titular kaiju’s franchise? You’ll just have to listen to find out. The usual language warning is in effect. Enjoy!

We decided to punish ourselves and watch Godzilla (1998). Gotta say, it just doesn’t hold-up. What the heck were they thinking when they greenlit this turd? I certainly hope that the sequel to the 2014 iteration is better than this heap of poop. Yeah, we used some coarse language in this one (mostly Zach). That’s just what […]

Greetings, all! We’re back with another episode on Friday the 13th. This time we tackled Part V: A New Beginning. (Full disclosure: We may have recorded this last year. So, if there are any 2018-ish references, that’s why.) Zach, being the [former] fan of the franchise, does not necessarily hate this movie, but the quality of these […]

Howdy, folks! Back at ya with another fun movie. Venom was definitely a blast to watch. This could be the first time we’ve enjoyed back-to-back movies. Kinda curious to see if we can hit the trifecta. We did use some language in this one. That was mostly a product of quoting characters from the movie. We […]

We are back! Yes, it’s been a spell, but we’ve been quite busy with life. Alas, we have gotten back to work. I’m not sure why it took us five years to watch this movie, but that’s just how it played out. Godzilla (2014) was a treat. This was a nice way to get back into […]

Rocky II. That just says it all. Zach is well-versed in the Rocky franchise; Melissa is not. So, it was worth visiting the second installment (because who starts at the beginning?) to see what the hoopla was about. Spoilers: Not much. If memory serves, we managed to keep it clean on this one. So, we hope […]

We watched Ghost Rider. I guess the title [Captain Planet] might seem a tad bizarre, but it’ll make total sense when you listen to this episode. What’s not to like about a Nicolas Cage movie? We managed to stay fairly clean this time around. Enjoy!

We’re back! A little later than usual, but life just gets in the way sometimes. At any rate, we did find the time to watch Exit Wounds (2001). It, of course, stars our man Steven Seagal. Though, does the word “star” really apply to any film with Seagal? Probably not. We are graced by his presence. […]

Man, we really didn’t know what to expect going in to Action Jackson, but we were happy to take that leap of faith. Lol! Look at his dad-shoes on the poster! This movie is something else. Zach could not wait to talk about this movie. It’s probably the most excited he’s been to discuss a movie […]

So, we recorded this one last July while we were on vacation in Ohio celebrating 10 years of blissful marriage. Part of that trip included a journey to Sweetwater Sound (a music xanadu that Zach just had to visit). We acquired our official podcasting mic while we were there; obviously we had to test it […]

FINALLY we have reached the end of our van Damme quad-pack. The Quest (1996) was the last piece of a very terrible puzzle. So, join us as we discuss a better-than-Street Fighter movie and give you our overall thoughts on JCVD. The usual language warning is in effect. Enjoy!

Timecop was, surprisingly, not a bad movie. We bickered over some of the paradoxes, but we had a fun time overall. Now, Melissa had never seen Street Fighter. I [Zach] knew that it was brutal, but I don’t think I did a good job of preparing Melissa for it. Woof. This movie was so bad. At […]

So, we decided to watch a better Van Damme movie, but does it rise to the level of “good”? Well, let’s just say that we watched a movie that is simultaneously good and bad. Give us a listen to hear what we really thought of Timecop. We got a bit contentious at the end of this […]

So, we decided to break into the New Year with a Jean-Claude Van Damme gem. I think we had only done one movie featuring JCVD (“The Expendables 2”) and figured we should embark on a JCVD journey. Let’s just say we could have chosen a better movie to start with. Pretty sure we used some […]

Yes, another visit to our local theater! So, we had very low expectations for this one, but were those expectations met? Well, you’ll have to listen to find-out! As the title implies, we spoil everything in this one. I’m pretty sure we have some language here and there. Enjoy, folks!

It’s hard to believe we waited 14 years to watch Catwoman, but the time just felt right. Honestly, it was the best movie we could watch on Christmas night. Why watch A Christmas Story, Christmas Vacation, or Die Hard? This was something else, folks. We definitely used some coarse language throughout this one. Movies like this just tend to […]

Season’s Greetings, folks! Sorry we didn’t post anything last week, but we are quite busy this time of the year. It’s hard to stay on top of things when you’re rolling around with four children, have Christmas parties, birthday parties, shopping, etc. Anyway, we did find the time to watch a delightful tale of an […]

Hey, everybody! We went to the movie theater and saw the 40th anniversary limited release of Superman. One of us loves this movie and cries when they watch it; Melissa enjoyed it, too. We hope you enjoy hearing us discuss it!

Greetings! We are back at it. Melissa came back and agreed to watch this garbage (see: Justice League). I (Zach) am so very thankful that we did not waste our money when this came out a year ago. Alas, I’ll leave it there. I believe I only used two naughty words in this one. Still, be […]

Well, another Thanksgiving day filled with family, friends, and overeating has come to an end. We hope that yours was filled with food, fun, and laughs. I think this is the first time we’ve actually done a holiday special on the actual holiday. I believe we used one coarse word, but I bleeped it. So, […]

We’re call this a BONUS episode. I [Zach] thought I’d take the opportunity to try a solo episode while Melissa is out of town. I wanted to take some time to love on my favorite horror movie of all-time. That, of course, is John Carpenter’s The Thing. What a movie! I kept my language in-check for the […]

Yes, we bring you the 1996 Ahhhhhnold vehicle, Eraser. One of us (see: Zach) had seen this movie an unnecessary number of times. Does that mean it’s good? Well, that all depends on your definition. Anyway, we had fun watching it. I would like to note that we recorded this a while ago (maybe in […]

Ok, we’re finally posting The Punisher. We’ve had this one waiting in the wings for a bit. Lol! I think we said we were going to do release it like over a month ago. At any rate, horror movies got in the way thanks to October. We’re gonna get this train back on track now. […]

We saw Halloween. We each had expectations; were they fulfilled? FYI: We spoil the entire movie. Minimal language in this one. We kept ourselves in-check for the most part. Enjoy!

Making movies in 3D was quite the thing for a year or two in the ’80s. You had Jaws 3-D, Amityville 3-D, Piranha 3-D, and, of course, Friday the 13th, Part 3-D. Friday the 13th, Part 3-D is probably Zach’s favorite installment in that franchise. The 3-D is pretty lame, but at least they didn’t […]

I feel like we just did an action movie with a grumpy old man. We did! It was Entrapment. We’re not too far off with this one. We both remembered loving Air Force One when it came out in 1997, but one of us changed our tune. If you’re a faithful listener, you can probably […]

Ok, we thought we’d follow-up our review of The Predator with a look at the other three films in the series (AvP does not, and never will, count). We didn’t do a deep-dive on all three, but we did enough digging to make it worthwhile. Ultimately, we disagreed on the order of best-to-worst, but that’s […]

Yeah, we went and saw The Predator. We had high hopes for this one. Zach, in particular, was really looking forward to it. Let’s just say that the original is still the undisputed champion. Usual language warning is in-effect. Enjoy!

Entrapment is the story of an old, master thief who is recruited by a government agency to help stop another master thief. The film then attempts to inject lots of mystery and intrigue, but, unless you’re a pizza box, you already know how the movie is going to end. It’s really painful/disturbing to watch an […]

I think that, years from now, we’re all gonna look back and realize that this was the most important film of Ryan Reynolds’ career. This and Green Lantern. Why? Because both movies are miserable (Full disclosure: I have never seen Lantern, but I can only assume that it is total garbage). I think the combo […]

There was a Friday the 13th back in April. We decided to celebrate that occasion by watching Friday the 13th, Part 2. It is a bad movie, but it is nowhere near as bad/boring as the original. Since we have done 1 & 2, we are going to forge ahead and do the whole series. […]

Yes, we really did go to the movies this time around. Usually we go to the DVD player, but we felt this movie deserved a big-screen viewing. I do not regret going, but I will not say that it was a mind-blowing adventure. Alas, Jason Statham is pretty solid. I love how he constantly has […]

At least that’s what Ralph tries to tell the counselors in Friday the 13th (1980). We decided to tackle a classic in the horror genre, but we felt that adjective was not really accurate. Honestly, it’s one of the most boring movies of all-time. I’m pretty sure there’s some language in this episode. Though, I […]

Ok, so we decided to give The Net a go. It’s a movie we’ve watched numerous times through the years. Not really sure why, but it is intriguing enough. It’s also funny to laugh at the ’90s tech. Everything about it cracks me up. We had a really fun time discussing this one. Enjoy!

So, we decided to watch and review Commando. I mean, it’s awesome, but there’s plenty of insanity throughout. I would also like to note that we both had a cold when we recorded this one. This is our longest episode thus far; it could have been longer. Honestly, I could discuss this movie all day […]

Greetings! We’re back with the second installment of our Expendables adventure. This one seemed bigger and better than the original, but looks can be deceiving. However, there were some entertaining moments in this movie. The humor was actually improved from the original, but that’s not really saying much. I’m pretty sure there’s some language here […]

Hello! So, we decided to start our podcasting adventure by tackling a trilogy. Neither of us had actually seen The Expendables before, but we felt it perfectly fit the mold. Going in, we knew it was an action movie, it starred all sorts of ’80s and ’90s action stars, and it had an insane premise. […]