Podcasts about family court services

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney and mediator, Brian A. Victor discusses the importance of communication in relationships.Listen to Attorney Brian A. Victor as he provides insight into the importance of communicating for co-parents and how this can lessen the stress involved for you and your children. Mr. Victor discusses how improving communication can help you in your everyday life. He provides examples of resources available to help you improve your communication skills. Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan. Mr. Victor is an Adjunct Professor of Law at Concord Law School.Divorce and Child Custody Discussion with Attorney Brian A. Victor was named one of the Top 15 Child Custody Podcasts You Must Follow by Feedspot.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor's podcast on iTunes, Spotify, and Google Podcasts so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.    The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney-client relationship. 

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney and mediator, Brian A. Victor discusses the importance of preparing for your Family Court Services (FCS) child custody mediation session. Listen to Attorney Brian A. Victor as he provides insight into the importance of preparing for the Family Court Services (FCS) child custody mediation session. He discusses his own experience of having worked at Family Court Services and the process of Family Court Services and how recommendations for a parenting plan is made to the court.  Mr. Victor prepares parents to attend their FCS session.Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Divorce and Child Custody Discussion with Attorney Brian A. Victor was named one of the Top 15 Child Custody Podcasts You Must Follow by Feedspot.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor's podcast on iTunes, Spotify, and Google Podcasts so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.    The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney-client relationship. 

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney and mediator, Brian A. Victor discusses the difficulties of communication during high conflict co-parenting. Listen to Attorney Brian A. Victor as he provides insight into the importance of communication when co-parenting. He also talks about the stress high conflict co-parenting causes the parents as well as the child. Attorney Victor provides his recent train trip as an example of how communication can be impacted and the problems lack of communication can cause high conflict co-parenting situations.Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Divorce and Child Custody Discussion with Attorney Brian A. Victor was named one of the Top 15 Child Custody Podcasts You Must Follow by Feedspot.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor's podcast on iTunes and Google Podcasts so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.    The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney-client relationship. 

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses 2021 a year in review and trends in family law that could continue through 2022.Listen to Attorney Brian A. Victor as he provides insight into how the Pandemic has affected the court system and how it is taking longer for courts to resolve divorce matters. He also talks about modifying parenting plans have also taken longer and the negative affects this can have on children. Mediation is also discussed as a good way to have a divorce and child custody matter heard quicker by a professional and allows the parties to decide how their divorce and parenting plan can be resolved. Attorney Victor provides insight to the process of mediation continuing throughout 2022.Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Divorce and Child Custody Discussion with Attorney Brian A. Victor was named one of the Top 15 Child Custody Podcasts You Must Follow by Feedspot.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor's podcast on iTunes and Google Podcasts so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.    The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship. 

If you already know what we're talking about- here's the link to donate! https://www.givemiamiday.org/fundraise/15906/join-me-in-supporting-kidside-inc. If not, read on! In Miami, a nonprofit organization called KidSide provides funding for Family Court Services, a unit that assists parents and children in the Family Court system in Miami's 11th judicial circuit. (It's called KidSide because they take the kid's side in these cases.) Last Thursday, we told you a murder story in which the children of the victim received help from Family Court Services, funded by KidSide. If you haven't listened yet, please do. Family Court Services provide critical assistance, counseling, and other resources to children from low-income families involved in high conflict court cases. Without KidSide, many kids wouldn't have access to these life-changing services that provide vital protection for underserved children in crisis. Kara and I are participating in Give Miami Day, and we're specifically raising money for KidSide. We're really hoping you guys will help us throw a lot of money at this organization that exists to help children who are already in crisis, who are at risk for further problems later in life. To join us and donate to KidSide, go to: https://www.givemiamiday.org/fundraise/15906/join-me-in-supporting-kidside-inc. Don't wait! The giving window closes at midnight on Thursday, November 18. Please help us spread the word by sharing the link and information with your friends. Thanks guys! We love you.

In 2018, the remains of Maribel Torres were discovered in a canal in Miami, and her husband Jimmy was charged with her murder. He is currently awaiting trial, and the allegations presented against him in this episode stem from statements made by the victim's sister as well as a witness who led police to Maribel's body. In Miami, a nonprofit organization called KidSide provides funding for Family Court Services, a unit that provides critical assistance, counseling, and other resources to children from low-income families involved in high conflict court cases. Without KidSide, many kids wouldn't have access to these life-changing services that provide vital protection for underserved children in crisis. When Jimmy Torres was arrested and charged with second-degree murder after his wife's body was found, their children received assistance from Family Court Services in the form of individual therapy and supervised visits with their father. Kara and I are participating in Give Miami Day to raise money for KidSide. We're really hoping you guys will help us throw a lot of money at this organization that exists to help children who are already in crisis, who are at risk for further problems later in life. To join us and donate to KidSide, go to: https://www.givemiamiday.org/fundraise/15906/join-me-in-supporting-kidside-inc. The giving window opens Monday, November 15 and closes Thursday, November 18. Please help us spread the word by sharing the link and information with your friends. Thanks guys! We love you. There's bonus content and other perks on our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/witchesmagicmurdermystery Podcast store: https://witches-magic-murder-mystery-podcast-store.myshopify.com If you're watching us on YouTube, our channel is filled with the unedited video of our podcast recording process for each full episode, starting with episode 26. To hear a more polished presentation, look us up on your favorite podcast listening app! Sources: https://miami.cbslocal.com/2018/06/15/man-charged-wifes-murder-human-remains-found/ https://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/crime/fl-sb-torres-murder-arrest-20180615-story.html https://patch.com/florida/miami/missing-miami-dade-woman-murdered-husband-police https://www.local10.com/news/2018/06/15/husband-accused-of-killing-missing-woman-dumping-body-in-canal/ https://kidsidemiami.org/ https://www.womenshealth.gov/relationships-and-safety/domestic-violence/effects-domestic-violence-children https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubPDFs/witnessdv.pdf https://www.aacap.org/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Facts_for_Families/FFF-Guide/Helping-Children-Exposed-to-Domestic-Violence-109.aspx https://www.givemiamiday.org/aboutGMD Public records from the Miami Dade County Clerk of Courts Website All Witches, Magic, Murder, & Mystery episodes are a mix of Kara and Megan's personal thoughts and opinions in response to the information that is publicly available at the time of recording, as well as, in some cases, personal accounts provided by listeners. In regard to these self-reported personal accounts, there can be no assurance that the information provided is 100% accurate. If you love the Trash Witch art (see our Patreon or the Podcast store), Tiffini Scherbing of Scherbing Arts created her. Find her art page on Facebook! She can create anything you need. Check out @witchesmagicmurdermystery on Instagram, or find our Facebook group by searching “Witches, Magic, Murder, & Mystery Podcast Discussion Group.” Email every single weird story you've got to witchesmagicmurdermystery@gmail.com. Get to know us better: Kara: @atoakandmain Megan: @megan_whitmer on Instagram and @meganmakesjokes on TikTok Theme music: Chloe's Lullaby by Robert Austin. Available on Spotify, Google Play, YouTube, Bandcamp, and Patreon!

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses how to create a child custody plan.Listen to Attorney Brian A. Victor as he provides insight into child custody plans and the importance of creating a good parenting plan. He also talks about children's school schedules and extra-curricular activities impact the creation of a child custody plan.  Parents work schedules are also discussed as is the topic of supervised visitation and how that can make creation of a child custody plan more difficult. Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Divorce and Child Custody Discussion with Attorney Brian A. Victor was named one of the Top 15 Child Custody Podcasts You Must Follow by Feedspot.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor's podcast on iTunes and Google Podcasts so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.  The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship. 

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses the process of child custody mediation.Listen to Attorney Victor as he provides insight into divorce and child custody mediation. He discusses how child custody mediation works, the benefits of child custody mediation vs. litigation and discusses the creation of parenting plans. Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Divorce and Child Custody Discussion with Attorney Brian A. Victor was named one of the Top 15 Child Custody Podcasts You Must Follow by Feedspot.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor's podcast on iTunes and Google Podcasts so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.  The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship. 

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses the topic of divorce and child custody mediation and the importance of having a mediation review and consultation attorney guide you through your mediation process.Listen to Attorney Victor as he provides insight into what a mediation review and consultation attorney can do for you and why you should have an attorney to consult with during mediation. Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor’s podcast on iTunes so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship.

In this podcast episode, San Diego divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses the topic of child custody mediation and the importance of preparing for your Family Court Services (FCS) session. Listen to Attorney Victor as he provides insight into the child recommending counseling session at Family Court Services. He discusses the importance of preparing for this session and how best to do so. Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor’s podcast on iTunes so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship.

Do you know how to identify child abuse? Do you know the excellent resources that are available in Santa Clara County that can prevent child abuse and neglect? Please listen to this Maitri podcast and share it widely to help save a child from abuse and neglect. Two experts in the child abuse prevention field, Dr. Suzanne Frank (a pediatrician and the Child Abuse Services & Prevention Champion) and Steve Baron (a retired Director of Family Court Services in Santa Clara County, a therapist, and an expert on Counseling Psychology) shared their knowledge, experiences, and resources to prevent child abuse. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/maitribayarea/message

In this podcast episode, San Diego Divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses the topic of what documents may be necessary in order to begin the divorce process. Listen to Attorney Victor as he provides insight into the documents that should be considered when preparing for divorce and the necessary documents your attorney may need from you to begin your court matter.Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego for more than 11 years where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor’s podcast on iTunes so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice and nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship.

In this podcast episode, San Diego Divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses the differences in child custody when ending a dating relationship vs. when divorcing. Listen to Attorney Victor as he provides insight into the issues and differences in child custody situations when ending a dating relationship rather than in a divorce situation. Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as in divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor’s podcast on iTunes so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice. And nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship.

In this podcast episode, San Diego Divorce and child custody attorney, Brian A. Victor discusses the stress on a child that is created by Father's Day and Mother's Day in divorce and child custody disputes.Listen to Attorney Victor as he provides insight into the issues that Father's Day and Mother's Day can create in families involved in divorce and child custody disputes and possible negative results on the child in these situations.Attorney Brian A. Victor has experience both in the field of psychology as well as divorce and child custody in San Diego. He worked at Family Court Services in San Diego where he created and recommended to family court judges parenting plans for parents unable to reach agreement on a child custody plan.Remember to subscribe to Attorney Victor’s podcast on iTunes so as not to miss any important discussions regarding divorce and child custody.The information provided in this podcast is to inform rather than to provide legal advice. And nothing in this podcast creates an attorney client relationship.

California’s legislature has given husbands, wives, and domestic partners of any persuasion the right to dissolve their marriages or domestic partnerships on the basis of irreconcilable differences.  Fault is not an issue.  Singing,“You cheated, you lied, you said that you loved me,” in Family Court gets you nowhere.  The process is also form driven.  There is one for almost everything and you have to use them.  And if you force yourself to read them carefully they do make sense.  Better yet, if you and your attorney fill them out completely when you’re supposed to and follow the italicized instructions exactly, things will go along much more quickly and much less expensively than otherwise.  The basics are not complex.  Dissolution of a marriage or a domestic partnership involves three major issues: Property Division, Child Support and Child Custody (only if you have minor children), and Spousal Support. Property Division The first issue is identifying all of the assets and debts both of you have, characterizing each as community or separate, dividing the community items in half, and confirming which separate items belong to each of you.  Everything you earn or acquire while you were married (which for convenience in this discussion includes being in a domestic partnership) and still living together (before your date of separation) is presumed to be community, the same for debts.  Separate assets and debts are those you had before you married, gifts or inheritances you received while married, and assets and debts explicitly acquired by you as separate property while married, unless you mixed up separate with community so you can no longer identify the separate.  Do your best to accept the proposition that fifty cents of every dollar you ever earned while married belonged to the other guy.  It’s true unless you have a prenuptial agreement that says otherwise. Child Custody and Support The second issue is child custody and support.  These days you have to be a very bad person or live in Outer Mongolia not to have joint legal and physical custody, so arguments over sole legal or physical custody have largely given way to arguments over timeshare - the ratio of the time (as a percentage) each of you has responsibility for the kids.  If you can’t agree on who has the kids when, don’t start World War III over it.  The State will happy to decide what’s best for them whether you like it or not.  Before a judge can make an order on the subject you have to go to mediation with Family Court Services.  If you still can’t agree, the FCS mediator will recommend a timesharing schedule to the judge, and the judge will adopt the recommendation as the order almost every time. Now that you know the time share percentages, calculating child support is easy.  A computer program is mandatory.  Although the program is the most complicated in the country, the inputs are simple.  The first is the timeshare of each party.  The second is the average monthly income of each party over the past twelve months, which for most people is not hard to determine.  Sorry, debts don’t count in determining what you pay.  Neither do expenses, except for health insurance, child care costs, and a few other deductions.  If you can’t manage your child support and your debts at the same time, your next stop may be bankruptcy court. Spousal Support The third issue is spousal support, which is either temporary (prejudgment) or permanent (post judgment).  You can agree on this yourselves.  If you can’t the computer program for child support also spits out a number for temporary spousal support.  It’s not mandatory to use the number for temporary support, but it’s usually what’s ordered.  The judges aren’t supposed to use the program for permanent spousal support, but they do anyway - nobody really knows what to do with the specific factors set out in the Family Code for permanent support, although everybody agrees that permanent spousal support should probably be lower than temporary.  Unless you’ve been married  for only a few years, the judge will probably not order a termination date for spousal support.  If you want it recalculated or terminated you’ll have to come back later and convince the judge that something has changed to justify doing so.  Each party has an obligation to become self supporting and to contribute to the support of the kids, but it’s easier to announce that rule than enforce it.  Compelling a previously non-working spousal support payee back into full-time employment is a protracted and expensive proposition. And there you have it.  The devil is in the details. Carlsbad Divorce Attorney Stanley D. Prowse is a California Certified Family Law Specialist. We welcome your legal inquiries.  

Self control is an old virtue.  Lately it seems people have less of it in private and public than they used to have.  This is too bad, particularly if you are going through a divorce.  Losing it completely at home is also a good way to start one, because it will probably get you arrested and kicked out of the house. At the hearing on whether to issue a permanent domestic violence restraining order, the person from whom protection is sought (by definition the person who got arrested, aka the "perp") starts off at a tremendous disadvantage, even if wrongly accused.  What is the best way to ensure that the order is issued against you?  You guessed it: act angry and belligerent, and fail to control yourself.  Even if you were in fact the victim, by acting like a jerk you'll seal your fate. Even if the divorce doesn't start with an out of control argument and an arrest, the need for self control is still just as important, particularly if minor children are involved.  Before the judge even sees you at the hearing to decide who gets the kids, you will have to spend a morning with a Family Court Services mediator. The mediator doesn't care about you.  The mediator cares about the welfare of the kids.  If you can't control your urge to argue with your soon to be ex, and to tell the mediator that he or she is a dirtbag, you can pretty much kiss the kids and any form of child custody goodbye.  On other hand, if you control yourself and talk calmly about your concerns for the kids' welfare, fate is much more likely to smile upon you.  Controlling yourself at the actual hearing is no less important.  If you have a lawyer, your opportunities to self destruct are limited, but you can still manage it by smirking and rolling your eyes during the presentation by the opposing lawyer.  If you don't have a lawyer helping you to stay calm and impassive, you'll have to do it yourself.  If you screw up and act like a jerk again, you may wind up with supervised visitation only. In that case, a whole new minefield is waiting.  You would like to get out of supervised vistation as quickly as possible, but you can easily make it last longer than it should by losing your self control at exchanges, or by giving in to the urge to bad mouth your spouse to the kids when the supervisor is listening in. Even without kids involved, and with or without an attorney, sef control throughout the whole process is essential.  Let go of the anger when it comes to property division.  Forget any thougts of concealing some of it.  It's an accounting problem, not World War III.  Accept a reasonable compromise rather than insisting on grinding the other guy into dust.  If you have to pay spousal support, don't play games by paying it late. Chances are you are not too great on self-control if you wind up in a divorce in the first place.  In any event, self control is essential to get through the process with your sanity intact, ready to start your new life on a sound foundation.  So, if you haven't got self-control, work hard at getting it.  If you already have it, work hard to keep it.  Self control is still a great virtue.

Child custody and visitation determinations are undergoing a seismic shift. Traditionally a parent's behavior was described.  Now it is diagnosed. For example, instead of Dad being self-centered, Dad is now narcissistic. Of course,  narcissism has been around for a long time.  Narcissus was the beautiful son of two Greek gods, who fell in love with his own reflection in a spring and pined away looking at himself. However, there were no psychologists in ancient Greece.  Now there are plenty of them around, and they fancy themselves scientists.  Their principal pastime is slicing human behavior into smaller and smaller slices, and giving each slice a supposedly scientific label. The psychologists' bible is the DSM, a kind of ever-expanding dictionary of the supposedly scientific labels they've thought up.  Hand in hand with the DSM is a series of standardized tests that purport to measure personality in terms of the labels, including the intensity - or variance from 'normal' - of the behaviors corresponding to the labels. The idea is to get a handle on what is or isn't abnormal about someone, label it, and if it's a highly intense abnormality, proceed to devise some sort of therapy to reduce it.  Intensely abnormal behavior thus becomes treatable mental illness. Simply Self Centered or Mentally Ill? Self-centered people are a dime a dozen.  They're not sick.  They're just irritating.  You do your best to live with them.  Label them narcissistic - intensely narcissistic - and it's another ballgame.  Now they're mentally ill and require psychotherapy. What does this have to do with child custody and visitation decisions?  A great deal.  Let's take self-centered Dad.  He's been driving Mom crazy with "me, me, me" almost from the time they married.  Their two kids are now fourteen and ten and don't like Dad's behavior any more than Mom does. Mom's had it up to here and decides to divorce Dad.  With her petition she files a request for an order granting her temporary sole physical custody and joint legal custody, with visitation for Dad every other weekend from Saturday morning till Sunday evening and Wednesday evenings after school. Dad is furious.  He wants joint physical custody and a 50/50 time share.  They go to mediation, and the Family Court Services mediator gets the message that Dad cares more about himself than the kids.  Now it's "ME! ME! ME!" The mediator interviews the kids.  The fourteen year old now has a right to be heard.  She is adamant that she wants to spend as little time with Dad as possible.  So is her little sister.  In her report, the mediator notes Dad's narcissistic personality and recommends to the court to order what Mom's asked for. FCS - Family Court Services Report The judge reads the FCS "Family Court Services" report, and gets the picture on Dad.  Dad's attorney follows Dad's instructions to 'fight for him for the kids' and only confirms the judge's picture.  Mom's attorney refers frequently to Dad's narcissistic behavior in her argument for Mom. However, the judge does not follow the FCS recommendations entirely. Dad's every other weekend will start Thursday evening and run until he takes the kids to school Monday morning.  The judge also orders Dad to take a parenting class and go to therapy while the case otherwise proceeds. Mom's upset and angry.  So are the kids.  What happened?  First, the judge is most concerned (as the Family Code dictates) with the "best interest of the child." Second, a healthy and bonded relationship between a child and both parents is in the child's best interest.  Third, Dad's extreme narcissism is a form of mental illness and stands in the way of that relationship. For the best interest of his children, therefore, we need to treat Dad's illness and make him better, so his relationship with them (and coincidentally with their mother) will normalize.  The judgment at the end of the case can't order Dad to continue in therapy, but while the case is pending, we'll do what we can to cure Dad. Wait a minute!  Aren't we divorcing these people?  Isn't it a little late to worry about fixing the problem that caused the divorce in the first place?   The  Family Court Services mediator, the judge, and the legal system represent the State of California, which in turn represents the taxpayers.  Why should they care about Dad's problems? The answer seems to be that it is worth pouring judges, mediators, psychologists, therapists, lawyers, time, and money into divorce court to help the children of divorced parents grow up to be normal adults.  The "Family" we are concerned about in the Family Code seems not to be the the pre-divorce intact family, but the post-divorce broken family. Parental Agreement On Child Custody and Visitation In A Divorce In practice the result is this.  If you are a parent with children entering a divorce, and you and your spouse cannot agree between yourselves on child custody and visitation, you are about to enter a mental hospital.  The more you fight over the kids, the more convinced the judge and everyone else will be that there is something wrong with one or both of you that needs fixing. You will eventually be diagnosed and labelled with some intensely abnormal behavior named in the DMS.  Then you have three choices.  First, deny the label and continue to fight.  This is a sure way to lose the fight and lose your kids.  Second, defiantly deny the label and in disgust give up the fight.  This is also a good way to lose the kids. Your third choice is to admit there might be something to the label and go with the flow.  This may be the most difficult choice to make, because it means acknowledging that there may be something WRONG with you. Maybe there is, maybe there isn't.  One thing is for sure - you earn many more points by agreeing with a judge than by arguing with him.  So, go to therapy, and consider the possibility that during all those years you thought you were normal, you weren't. It might be painful, but isn't it better than losing the kids? Say goodbye to, 'I'm right and you're wrong.'  Say hello to, 'Why don't you tell me how you feel about that.' San Diego Divorce Attorney Stanley D. Prowse is a California Certified Family Law Specialist. We welcome your legal inquiries.

Child support must be calculated according to a complex formula set forth in the Family Code. It is complex because it is supposed to be perfectly fair, unlike the simple and arbitrary formulas used by other states. Except in rare cases, the only inputs are the average gross monthly incomes of the parties and the percentage of time each spends with the children. CALCULATING CHILD SUPPORT Child support tends to be a dirty word to the high earner spouse in a divorce. He or she is likely to come away thinking the amounts ordered by the court are grossly unfair, and much too high. They are also likely to think that they have been singled out to suffer more than their similarly situated  friends. Unless your attorney has been asleep at the switch, these perceptions are unwarranted as far as child support is concerned.  The California legislature has bent over backwards to make child support orders both fair and consistent, and in the vast majority of cases they are. Child support must be calculated according to a complex formula set forth in the Family Code.  It is complex because it is supposed to be perfectly fair, unlike the simple and arbitrary formulas used by other states.  Except in rare cases, the only inputs are the average gross monthly incomes of the parties and the percentage of time each spends with the children. Income is defined as it is in the Internal Revenue Code. Although the self-employed have more opportunities to cheat, pay stubs and tax returns are for most people dispositive of their incomes.  The percentage of time each parent spends with the children is called their “time share.”  Time share depends on the parties’ agreement, or if they can’t agree, on the court’s custody order. Family Court Services Mediator and Child Support Recomendations There needn’t be wailing and gnashing of teeth over time share. The State is happy to help you. By law the judge cannot make a custody order until the parties participate in mediation with a Family Court Services mediator, and the mediator provides recommendations in a written report to the judge.  The last page of the recommendations states the corresponding time share. The theory here is that judges are not a trained social workers, as the mediators must be, and should be guided by the mediator’s expert opinions.  The practice is that judges usually adopt the recommendations whole hog, rather than agonize over the parties’ conflicting evidence and arguments.  Voila!  We now know the time share percentages.  Into the computer they go, along with the parties’ incomes, and out comes who pays child support and how much it is. As you can see, this makes for consistency.  If you still don’t think it’s fair, remember that the perfect is the enemy of the good. Carlsbad Divorce Attorney Stanley D. Prowse is a Certified California Family Law attorney that specializes in all aspects of child custody and child support cases. We welcome your legal inquiries.

There are two kinds of custody and two ways to allocate them between parents. The first kind of custody is legal. The second is physical. The first way to allocate custody is to award it to one parent. This is called sole custody. The second way is to award it to both parents. This is called joint custody. Physical Child Custody & Legal Child Custody There are two kinds of child custody and two ways to allocate them between parents.  The first kind of child custody is legal.  The second is physical.  The first way to allocate child custody is to award it to one parent.  This is called sole custody.  The second way is to award it to both parents.  This is called joint custody.  Joint child custody is defined as joint physical custody and joint legal custody. Sole legal custody Sole legal custody means that one parent, and only one, has the right and responsibility to make the decisions relating to the health, education, and welfare of a child.  Sole legal custody is unusual. First, it is contrary to the recognized right and responsibility of each parent to parent his or her child.  The State believes your child needs you, and the State wants you involved with raising your child.  Second, most parents - happily enough - are not threats to the safety, health, and well being of their children.  For one parent to have sole legal custody, the other parent must be physically and emotionally abusive, addicted, mentally ill, thoroughly irresponsible, or in jail, to name a few examples. Sole physical custody means that a child resides with and is under the supervision of one parent. If one parent has sole physical custody, the other parent has visitation.  Ordinarily the factors that result in an award of sole legal custody to one parent result in an award of sole physical custody as well. Joint legal Custody verses Joint Physical Custody Joint legal custody means that both parents share the right and responsibility to make the decisions relating to the health, education, and welfare of the child. Joint physical custody means that each of the parents has significant periods of physical custody, and that they share physical custody in a way that assures the child frequent and continuing contact with both parents. Joint legal custody and sole physical custody are not necessarily inconsistent.  For example, divorced parents often live far away from each other, making frequent and continuing physical contact impossible for both.  In such cases the child might live with one parent eleven months of the year.  That parent would have sole physical custody, and the other parent would have visitation.  However, they will probably have joint legal custody if the factors normally resulting in sole legal custody are not present Joint custody is normally awarded.  In the order of preference set forth in the Family Code, it is in first place.  That still leaves open the question of how much time the child spends with each parent, referred to as the time share. The time share percentage is used to calculate child support, along with the parties’ incomes.  Although some parents easily reach agreement on a time share schedule without much formality, time share is usually a contentious issue.  The usual joint custody order is therefore quite detailed. Family Court Time Share Recommendations The detailed time share recommendations of Family Court Services mediators in contested matters are also useful guides for negotiating and preparing timeshare schedules in uncontested matters.  The time share schedule will be part of the court’s custody order in either case.  We can help you negotiate a time share schedule if you and your child’s other parent are agreeable.  We can go to court with you and argue for the adoption of Family Court Services recommendations that are favorable to you and rejection of those which are not. San Diego Divorce Attorney Stanley D. Prowse is a California Certified Family Law Specialist. We welcome your legal inquiries.