Communal Bathroom

In this episode, Chris brings a song about football memories while Sam brings a dramatic reading of a group chat. Chris introduces us to A Terrible Superhero (Captain Century) while Sam recalls a meeting with A Real Character (Samosa Man aka Inspekta Veg) and they both try to learn a little more about themselves by doing a Myers-Briggs test in 'The Self Improvement Sauna'.

Chris and Sam are joined by Kieran “Ichabod Wolf” Smith and Mario D’Agostino in a special bath time sing song. Mario has a song about a blazed family dinner, Chris has a saucy tune about some thirsty monks and Ichabod Wolf blesses us a with a future classic of past good times.

The Unblockable Toilet by Communal Bathroom

A new era of The Communal Bathroom begins! Sam no longer lives on boat and is a married man, while Chris has realised a lifelong dream of making a ‘proper album’. Re-embracing the ‘anything goes’ approach, Sam and Chris bring a jam-packed first episode back. Sam brings a letter from a dog, a collection of his own invented words and introduces us to his yearly theme of ‘completing’, by completing a long lost DFTCB item. Chris updates everyone about bathroom product innovations, and brings two songs: a stomper about stompers, and a volatile song about vocanologist love. We take some time to meditate with Chris’ Mindspace guide and we even have a sauna song from Chris' band-wife Mario D’Agostino. Get back into the water, bathers!

Jazz: the great American art form of the 20th century, raked over and misunderstood by two idiot bathroom boys. Recorded live at a dingy downtown Bristol Youth Hostel, this episode sees Sam teaching Chris about The Lick, while Chris brings Sam some jazz made out of jazz. There's some woefully uninspired jazz criticism (Louis Armstrong = good) and, of course, there's a quiz pitting real sub-genres of jazz against sub-genres that Sam has made up. M-BASE anyone?

After settling the bets from the previous episode ‘Gambling’, Sam rocks us to slumber with a 3 / 4 time jam and then Chris presents a quiz about animal snoring. They both delve into their subconscious: Sam makes one of his dreams come true, while Chris allows his dreams to be influenced. Chris shares some more sleep music, and Sam wakes us up again with a series of escalating alarms.

All bets are ON in this episode, as Sam and Chris take a punt at gambling. They discuss scratchcards and casinos, Chris tackles online sports betting, Sam hopes for the best with randomised music production, Chris dwells on the ways we gamble with our lives, and Sam pits the two of them together in a series of high stakes games. Find the show notes at www.communalbathroom.com/podcast/gambling

In this first episode of 2018, Sam and Chris take a bite out of the grisly subject of meat. Sam goes vegan, and brings his new found sanctimoniousness to a fairly listenable sound art piece, while also offering us a taste test of various vegan meats. Chris brings an audio diary about his own particular diet and analyses the hellscape that is meat advertising. Click here for all the Show Notes: https://www.communalbathroom.com/podcast/meat

The bathroom boys have met in the middle, somewhere near Birmingham, at the geographic midpoints between their homes to record a sun kissed episode of two halves. Chris has brought a Sci-Fi story written with a mystery collaborator and a song about our better halves. Sam has a breathless beat poem, and a Pu Qu or Ub Iz depending on your outlook on life. Show Notes: https://www.communalbathroom.com/half-half

All hands off the cold tap in this episode: We are getting Red, Hot and Spicy. Chris does some chilli spice training, Sam takes us to 4 hot corners of the globe, Chris teaches us about spices through song, and together they imagine their ideal spicy 90s supergroup and undertake a live spice challenge. Come on in and get HOT. Click here for all the Show Notes: https://www.communalbathroom.com/podcast/redhotspicy

The sound of paint: How do you represent a visual medium in an audio platform? Chris and Sam scour the internet for programs to help them achieve SONIC PAINT. They take inspiration from Turner, Picasso and Warhol and craft their own paintings out of yoghurt and bathrooms. And Chris poses the question: 'Can you tell the difference between real Farrow and Ball paint names and made up ones? (Sam cannot). SHOW NOTES https://www.communalbathroom.com/podcast/paint

In this episode Sam and Chris focus on football. Not knowing who they support or what the rules are, Sam and Chris explore the nuances of the beautiful game as best they can. Chris brings a dispatch from a famous ground and a song about a famous player. Sam chants some chants and presents a quiz about footballers and fantasy franchise characters. There is also The World's Worst Keepy Uppy Competition Ever and, of course, some half-time oranges.

In this episode, our time is spent dwelling on 'Time'. Both Sam and Chris experiment with time-manipulated music, Sam takes us through the past in fast forward, Chris presents a game, and together they make completely accurate predictions for the future.

In this, the first episode of 2017, Chris and Sam discuss eggs. There is an egg story, an egg rap, some audio scrambled eggs and an egg quiz. Having learnt lessons from 2016's podcasting, this year's DFTCB episodes will each have a different theme but will be more consistent with our original dispatch format. Expect to see new episodes out on the third Monday of every month.

The Hills Of Sheffield by Communal Bathroom

For their 2nd annual celebration of pizza the boys from DFTCB write 50 songs about pizza featuring a special guest appearance from Chris Gethard. Track listing Slice 1: Gimme A Pizza 1. Gimme A Pizza (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere. Mixed and masteried (M&M) by David Brady 2. Pizza and Video Games (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley 3. Queen Margherita of Savoy (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 4. Travelling Pizza Saleswoman (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 5. Pizza Goggles (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere. M&M by David Brady 6. Pizza Taster Pro (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 7. Dr Oetker (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 8. First Time I went to Pizza Express (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 9. Tomatoes (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere M&M by David Brady 10. An Egg Implores Thee (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 11. Delicious Pizza (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley and Sally Beveridge 12. What’s Your Name and What’s Your Favourite Pizza (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley 13. Hey Miss Primary School Teacher (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 14. Karl Marx has a Pizza (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 15. Deep Dish (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 16. Calzone Ridge (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 17. Bottom of the Sea (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 18. Girl, Let’s Go To The Beach (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 19. Pizza Plaice (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 20. Stoned, Baked Oven Pizza (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere M&M by David Brady 21. P.I.Z.Z.A. (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley 22. P.I.Z.Z.A. (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere 23. Consolatory Post-Brexit Pizza Blues (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere M&M by David Brady 24. Pizza dub (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley 25. Papa John (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 26. Pie vs Pizza (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere and David Brady M&M by David Brady 27. Pizza Shaman (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 28. Flying Pizzas (Delamere) Performed by Sam Bradley and Chris Delamere 29. Pepperoni vs Garlic vs Chris Delamere (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere Slice 2: The Pizza Gethard Caper 30. Extra Toppings (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley and Chris Delamere 31. That Hollow Bit of Time (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere M&M By David Brady 32. Pineapple Question (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley 33. The Ballad of Old Man Tata (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere M&M by David Brady 34. Scottish Pizza (P. Delamere/C. Delamere) Performed by Pete Delamere and Chris Delamere M&M by David Brady Slice 3: Reflections on Life, Music and Pizza 35. The Very Last Pizza (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere and David Brady M&M by David Brady 36. When We're Next Earthside (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 37. Country Pizza (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere and David Brady M&M by David Brady 38. Not a Pizza (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley 39. Bad Trip Pizza (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere and Mario D’Agostino 40. Pizza Anniversary (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere M&M by David Brady 41. Melancholy Reflections (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 42. #Cheatday (Delamere/Harvey) Performed by Chris Delamere and Sam Bradley 43. Pizza Lullaby (Harvey) Performed by Chris Delamere and Jade Harvey 44. Night Out Alone (Clear/D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino and Simon Clear 45. Make My Last Meal A Pizza (Clear) Performed by Simon Clear 46. One For Quattro Stagioni Mitchell (D’Agostino/Mitchell) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 47. Down with Pizza (Bradley) Performed by Sam Bradley and Chris Delamere 48. Better The Pizza You Know (Bradley/Stock/Aitken/Waterman) Performed by Sam Bradley 49. Grease On The Sheets (D’Agostino) Performed by Mario D’Agostino 50. Red Stripes (Delamere) Performed by Chris Delamere M&M by David Brady

In this episode, Sam and Chris are joined by the linchpin of their ever expanding podcast network, Mario D'Agostino. Coming at the end of a mammoth podcast recording weekend, the guys discuss space and toothbrushes, exploring pulsars both celestial and dental. Elsewhere, Chris attempts a religious ritual and brings a song promoting the avoidance of untimely death while Sam gets us all lathered and excited about a new quiz. Throughout the episode attempts are made to keep Mario on a short leash so that he doesn't go overboard with a particular hyperintrajocularity, but these attempts, for the most part, utterly fail.

In this special and long-gestating episode, Sam and Chris attempt to improve their lives in a variety of ways, from the daft, sweaty, vague and unmeasurable to the more meditative, mental and meaningful. Sam reads some books whilst Chris concentrates on particular words. Sam attempts to improve his skateboarding and Chris tries yoga for the first time. Sam seeks to improve his job prospects and Chris invests in some fabric conditioner. It gets a bit personal and everyone gets a bit happier and healthier.

In homage to 12 Hour Day with JD and Connor, Sam and Chris attempt to record a podcast for 12 hours. They go to their parents houses, meet some of the leading lights of the Sheffield comedy scene, and end up at a folk session in the pub. This is part 2 (soundcloud has a time limit on uploads). Note: We lost the last hour of Jade's mic recording, sorry about that.

In homage to 12 Hour Day with JD and Connor, Sam and Chris attempt to record a podcast for 12 hours. They go to their parents houses, meet some of the leading lights of the Sheffield comedy scene, and end up at a folk session in the pub. This is part 1 (soundcloud has a time limit on uploads).

In this, the final soak in the virtual bathroom, Sam and Chris prepare to say goodbye to their respective homes in France and Chapeltown. In a particularly bathroomy episode, Chris brings a bathroom-fixated reworking of a classic folk song and Sam encourages us to take some sexy pics in the bathroom. Damien McHugh sends a guest dispatch he made on an ancient phone and, as promised in Episode 18, we have two dispatches about DFTCB Facebook page 100th liker. Molly Ibbitson was the lucky(?)winner and she may or may not own a dog (we don't know).

Bonjour and Bienvenue to Le Gallic Bathroom! Having endured a long-distance bathroomship for many months, Sam and Chris find themselves once again in knee-groping distance of each other on the top of a mountain in the French Alps. Joined by their friend Ahmed (who has never listened to the show), they bathe in a baked brie of sonic delights, taking in topics such as showers, skiing, unsolicited phonecalls, disturbed sleep, bathroom robots and finding love in a universe sorely consisting of a near-infinite library. Producer Paul pops up to discuss his domestic arrangements with Chris and also coins the term 'Proper Revenant'.

With another dip into 'The Virtual Bathroom', Sam and Chris valiantly attempt once again to make an episode that is mainstream and popular. They indulge in many top timesuckers and mortality distractions such as: 'Music', 'The Internet', 'Video Games', 'Religion' and 'Long-running US TV Series'. Sam writes a love song, Chris reviews a computer game. Sam creates the ultimate internet list and Chris delves into some radio drama. Sam leads a prayer from upon a mountain top, they both make promises they can't fulfil, and Housekeeping goes in a shocking new direction. Chris thinks people will not like this episode.

The Communal Bathroom is no stranger to alcohol. The bath is often awash with all manner of wines and continental lagers. You will have heard them drunk and you will certainly have heard them hungover. So who better to present a two-part sonic exploration on the subject: one episode about the delights of drinking, and one episode about the hell of hangovers. In the first episode, they got drunk. They said cheers and had their first pint, they sang songs together and tried to decide which club to go to, they got to the club and the evening browned out. In this, the second episode, they are hungover. They try to recover with some soothing music while trying not to reflect too much on the night before, they look at the science of the hangover and at the end of the day they find themselves hearing the call of alcohol once again. It's taken a little longer this time to get a new episode out. Let's just say they were waiting at the bar for a while so they thought they may as well buy two. Cheers!

The Communal Bathroom is no stranger to alcohol. The bath is often awash with all manner of wines and continental lagers. You will have heard them drunk and you will certainly have heard them hungover. So who better to present a two-part sonic exploration on the subject: one episode about the delights of drinking, and one episode about the hell of hangovers. In this, the first episode, they get drunk. They say cheers and have their first pint, they sing songs together and try to decide which club to go to, they get to the club and the evening browns out. In the second episode, they are hungover. They try to recover with some soothing music while trying not to reflect too much on the night before, they look at the science of the hangover and at the end of the day they find themselves hearing the call of alcohol once again. It's taken a little longer this time to get a new episode out. Let's just say they were waiting at the bar for a while so they thought they may as well buy two. Cheers!

With Sam having moved to France, this 2nd Season opener is the first dip into 'The Virtual Bathroom'. Using laptop-straining technical wizardry, and with the expressed intent of moving into more accessible, mainstream territory, Sam and Chris get stuck into a glut of new dispatches. Central to this episode are two outside contributions. Chris presents a dispatch from Laura Sullivan, who brings us some stories of strangers from Australia, and Sam bags an exclusive interview with 'The Guy From Star Wars'. In between is the patented DFTCB mix of songs, poems and borderline unlistenable sound art about subjects as various as rust, new year's resolutions and contactless card payment systems. Genuinely surprised that one or both of their laptops didn't die in the process, Sam and Chris may have accidentally forgotten the plan to be more mainstream and accessible...

In this, the season finale, the Communal Bathroom is joined by contributor and co-conspirator Mario D'Agostino. The gang sharpen their 'now' in the face of some stinking hangovers and get stuck into a bumper crop of dispatches. Sam helps you out with your morning routine, offering some towel advice and giving you a brand new alarm clock. Chris helps you out with Christmas, offering you Christmas present buying advice and a song that could be a future Christmas classic. There's a mysteriously submitted concept album about our very own Producer Paul, as well as a musical contribution from Producer Paul himself. Mario brings us songs about unhygienic basins and grumbling commuters, and Mario and Chris combine on a pub pop anthem. Along the way, between giddy bouts of maniac laughter, there are arguments and machinations that threaten to change the show forever...

No diving, no running and definitely no heavy petting, with 6 people in the bathroom this time, I hope no one has a verruca. Producer Paul, Brad Francisco and Mayor Gunson all appear in this busy bathroom. And appearing for the first time is mysterious new guest The Angry Swede. Brad and Chris attempt to think about their thoughts, while Sam takes us on a musical sound collage adventure story. We hear a short stand-up set from comedian Gary Arsehole, a medley of nursery rhymes and another ambient dispatch from an anonymous bather. Mayor Gunson makes a political gaff, The Angry Swede gets angrier and the whole gang make a big mess and just get housekeeping in to sort it all out.

This is Chris writing a description of the episode and this description will not be rewritten or edited. Illusions are shattered this time - this episode is entirely unedited. In our Euston Square studios, we are joined by poor old put-upomn Producer Paul (who is an awful mood). Chrsi does some dispatches about TIME, talking to some musicians about time and trying to impose some kind of theme about time onto the episode(Unsuccessfull). Sam bring s a new jungle and a couple of songs, one about skateboarding and one about (DFTCB running joke) naming obscure areas of Sheffield. Other things happen too I think. Producer Paul's mood improves at some point. It was all a blur for me to be honest, but is was a lott of fun.

Back in the Chapeltown studios, four of the DFTCB crew convene for a boozy celebration of Sam's thesis completion. Joining Chris, Sam and Producer Paul this time is the original Chapeltown resident and Sheffield mayoral election hopeful Daniel Gunson. Mayor Gunson tries to appeal to the electorate by announcing progressive financial policies and inviting them all round for a cup of tea. In this strange, new post-thesis world, Sam compiles a Freedom Mixtape and Chris suggests, via song, various career paths that Sam could take. Sam takes to Instagram to find motivation and Chris takes to Craigslist to find friends. In the bathroom department, there is a spooky anonymously-submitted bathroom-made dispatch and we also journey back in time to visit the bathroom of a major historical figure. "The weighty pocket of the everyman need be no more!" Gunson 2017

It's Pizza Weekend! And the Communal Bathroom gang go on a cross-country tour of pizza from Manchester to London! In this free-wheeling episode, Chris reveals his 28-day pizza-abstinence challenge diary and eats his first post-abstinence pizza. Sam, meanwhile, plays both wily antagonist and excited commentator. Elsewhere, Ben Meker drunkenly attempts to explain how to make a cob pizza oven and interactive drinks are invented that celebrate both Producer Paul's bathroom habits and also some of the more hirsute elements of previous episodes of the show The subject of pizza is given a good chewing over, and then it's all washed down with an incredible song from folk singer John Byers (aka Mario D'Agostino) about possessive pint protection A challenge. A journey. A lot of gin. Some pizza. Many songs. See you next year!

After a glut of guests in recent episodes, it's back to bubble bath basics...Sam and Chris each find themselves a warm, sudsy spot in the bath and take the opportunity to calm out and chill down. As they relax, they ponder upon the violent rap wars of Chester and the easy-going educational songs of Zambia. Chris conducts a desert of sound, Sam sounds off about a dessert and together they bring cacophonous life to a piece of fan fiction. Between the deep breaths and bubbles, they find time to talk about pizza abstinence, their ongoing attempts to get 'hyperintrajocularity' into common parlance, and to finish, they dunk themselves a couple of times into the Christopher Delamere Song Archive Lucky Dip. Come on in and get clean and calm out and chill down. Ahhhhh....

We're having a party! In attendance: 4 humans, 2 tortoises and 1 duck. It's Sam's tortoises' 5th birthday, so Sam and Chris have two guests to join in the celebrating. Now a fully fledged member of bathroom staff but who for tax reasons gets paid in chilli....It's Producer Paul. And...you may remember her from a brief cameo in episode 3 in which she spat water all over the bathroom...It's Sam's Darling Girlfriend Sally. The podcast party entertainment includes fancy cocktails, door jazz, tortoise comedy, terrible puns, and a good old pray to some patron saints. The bathroom guests try to cleanse everyone's souls, with Producer Paul once again extolling the virtues of 'That Glass Of Water That You Have Immediately After Having Brushed Your Teeth' and Darling Girlfriend Sally giving all the collected bathers some much needed spiritual guidance.

He's maths in the dark. He's a bag of the masses. He's the church nightwatchman. He is the crumpled martyr of Malmo. That's right, our special guest this episode is none other than Brad Francisco! Shadowy Gamesmaster Francisco helps direct our journey through weird noises, weird birthday presents and weird birthday noise presents. There's some special music sent in by No. 1 fan and duck namesake Jonathan Hamnett (a.k.a. Jon The Man), one of the bathers becomes a God to aliens, a duck is both insulted and molested, new flags are unfurled across the internet and it all gets a bit emotional with the biggest outpouring of fan praise we've ever had.

Joining Sam and Chris in the bathroom this time is their good friend Producer Paul, who sees to all their engineering needs and also wades in on such serious subjects as 'That Glass Of Water That You Have Immediately After Having Brushed Your Teeth'. Producer Paul joins a growing fold which includes of course their swimming sidekick Jon The Duck, as well as the masterfully mirthful Mario D'Agostino who contributes a song about hospital administration. The guys introduce you to the game of 'Lazy TV Executives' , discuss the relative merits of Euston Square, intentionally offend over half the world's population and take their chances on a lucky dip.

Sam and Chris throw everything at this podcast and see what sticks. With the aid of cryptic cue cards and swimming sidekicks, they sound off about the city of Sheffield and conflabulate about the community of kendama. There is a rap about cycling and some jokes about punk. In this the most adventurous episode to date, there is also more than one attempt at on-air hair removal, with both painful and spiritual consequences. It's a weird one.

In this shorter solo episode, Chris gets the run of the bathroom as Sam is busy with actual real life stuff. Chris gets a little lonely and a little scared, and entertains himself by taking a walk and writing songs about food. Sam sends in a dispatch about procrastination and also speaks to us from a continental bath!

The bathroom moves down south, and this time we're on a boat! Sam welcomes Chris to the boat by explaining the rigours of boat life, and Chris struggles with some of its less convenient aspects... And then songs and poems abound! There's a famous poem set to music, a famous song with new lyrics, a poem about a special friend, a poem competition, and a poem performed musically with the special friend that the previous poem was about!

Episode 2 of Dispatches From The Communal Bathroom is a Beatles Special! Our two intrepid audio adventurers bravely tackle the Beatles behemoth in the face of extreme tiredness (which they concede was their own fault). There's a quiz from Sam, and a song from Chris, an interview beamed in from 1967 and a creepy dispatch from a fuzzy part of the internet. All conducted with the occasional dance with copyright infringement.

Welcome to the bathroom! In this first trip Sam brings some dispatches of clandestine recordings of a North London house party and some sexy/ unsexy readings, whilst Chris takes us on a soundscape journey through the gents' hometown of Sheffield and introduces us to The Bullrushes.