DRAGONFLY RADIO

Today we are joined by Sophie Misouri of Wild Oats Birth Services and her journey as a Infant and Pregnancy Loss Death Doula. Learn more >> http://wildoatsbirth.com From Sophie's website: "I’m Sophie Misouri, a bilingual Sudbury-based doula, the founder of Wild Oats – and a mom of two who understands firsthand how much of a game-changer doula support can be. ​Though I studied Psychology and Anthropologie (at Laurentian) and am a graduate of Collège Boréal’s Occupational and Physiotherapy Assistant Program, it was my own birth experience that inspired me to become a doula and start Wild Oats. With my first daughter Annabelle, who was born in 2016, I endured 26 hours of unpredictable and intense ‘back labour’. Out of exhaustion and desperation, I requested an epidural – and ended up pushing for two-and-a-half hours. The experience left me scarred – both physically and mentally. Determined to have a different experience the second time around, I sought the help of a doula when I became pregnant again. With her in my corner, I felt informed, supported and empowered– and ended up having an incredibly positive second birth experience in 2018. In addition to giving me another daughter – sweet Nina – that second pregnancy and birth experience changed the direction of my career and life’s work. I knew even before Nina was born that this was my calling and began the process of certifying (through Bebo Mia). The rest, as they say, is history."

This episode, your host Joy Wirta, speaks about Grief and Bereavement with Madeleine Sauve.

This episode I speak with Lise Leblanc, A local author here in Northern Ontario, Author of Heal the Grieving Heart & Soul And Heal the Caregivers Heart & Soul. http://liseleblanc.ca

Dragonfly Radio recently had an opportunity to sit and chat with Tracey with the Home Hospice Association. We discuss home hospice, delivering hospice in home, and discovering how other countries do it. Home Hospice Association https://www.homehospiceassociation.com/meet-our-team Dragonfly Advisory Services http://www.dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca

Thanks to special guest Guy Villeneuve with Villeneuve Financial Consulting who joined us on the show today to talk about being prepared in case something happens to us/ our family members. http://villeneuvefinancial.ca Email: guy@villeneuvefinancial.com Phone: 705-674-1974 ext 134 Address: 272 Larch Street Sudbury, ON P3B 1M1 Jacqueline Villeneuve, Zawadi La Tumaini http://www.zlthope.org

Lise Perreault is an amazing woman, who spends her days working at making a difference. Listen to our chat with Lise our Crime Stoppers and Seniors Coordinator here with Greater Sudbury Police Services. Lise, discusses, seniors, scams, awareness and how to protect yourself. She is an amazing liaison for GSPS, and works diligently in helping keep our seniors safe. You can contact her at 705-675-9171. You can also watch the YouTube video https://youtu.be/FWbeE7ioXlM Till Next Time Joy Dragonfly Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/dragonflyadvisoryservices/

Dragonfly Radio recently had an opportunity to sit and chat with Sarah from Bodystream Medical Marijuana Services here in Greater Sudbury. Sarah explains the process, and benefits for many. Have a listen, you may be plesantly surprised. For more information on Bodystream, please go to their website at https://www.bodystream.ca/ or call 1-800-730-8210 Email doctors@bodystream.ca to make an appointment today! or CALL 1-800-730-8210 For any other inquiries please email sarahcbodystream@gmail.com Bodystream is Canada’s leading Medical Marijuana Service Provider, offering compassionate and comprehensive service to patients approved for the use of medical marijuana all across Ontario. Abiding by Health Canada’s Marijuana for Medical Purposes Regulations (MMPR), our team of doctors and support staff are able to help you every step of the way towards obtaining medical marijuana to treat your condition or illness. Medical marijuana is gaining in popularity as an alternative approach in treating a wide range of disorders. Studies are ongoing to determine the effectiveness of medical marijuana for various conditions, so you can expect this list to grow. Here is a list of conditions that may benefit from treatment with medical marijuana: Chronic Pain Nausea from Cancer Treatment Colitis Crohn’s Disease Fibromyalgia Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) Migraines Muscular Dystrophy Parkinson’s Disease Sleep Disorders Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Hepatitis C Back & Neck Problems Depression Multiple Sclerosis Spinal Cord Injury/Disease HIV/AIDS Rheumatoid Arthritis Epilepsy ADD/ADHD Eating Disorders For more information on Bodystream, please go to their website at https://www.bodystream.ca/ or call 1-800-730-8210 Email doctors@bodystream.ca to make an appointment today! or CALL 1-800-730-8210 For any other inquiries please email sarahcbodystream@gmail.com

Today Dragonfly Radio speaks with Dawn Condon of Connected Living. Dawn is an amazing and inspirational woman. Her passion and dedication within our community of Greater Sudbury is ultimately enriching. Her direction in self care is truly a blessing. Dragonfly Radio was honoured to share her tips and advice for mental and physical health. Find her at https://dawncondon.ca/ Contact Dawn: Website: https://dawncondon.ca/

Today Dragonfly Radio speaks with Jessica from St. George Medical. Can't make it to your doctor's office? No problem! St. George Medical is a mobile tele-medicine clinic with a Doctor and a Nurse who provides care to you at home. They manage acute and chronic conditions. All you need is a valid OHIP card! Contact St. George Medical: Website: https://stgeorgemedical.ca/ Phone: 1 (705) 626-7733 Email: admin@stgeorgemedical.ca Facebook page for updates: https://www.facebook.com/mobiletelemedclinic/

For myself and please remember that this is my personal journey and my opinions alone, I am constantly educating myself with grief and loss. So I often find myself seeking information and discussions that are structured around death, to better Dragonfly Advisory Services and helping those families who have lost someone. Because remember I am not a therapist or grief counsellor, but have more personal experience that one should have. There are so many amazing support programs within our country it is outstanding. As September was Suicide Prevention Month, I would often take the opportunity to educate myself, and reading every bit of material I could on the subject, it was surprising on the statistics alone from Statcan are staggering 3926 alone in 2012 ranging from ages 10 through to 90’s. It is noted that dealing with a loss to suicide is like no other, and the process can be complex and traumatic as the death is usually self-inflicted and often the family members are unsure on how to express the loss and those on the receiving end are often unsure as to what to say. As our family has had a personal experience with such, I can honestly say that you start to questions a lot, and wonder if you missed any signs, or of there could have been a way to prevent the tragedy from happening. Statistics show that there are more feelings of anger, resentment, and abandonment than any other cause of death. The positive news is that with Joining the Dialogue there have been amazing breakthroughs for Suicide Prevention, we have been able to bring programs to help educate and assist families and loved ones with a voice to help others. There are amazing resources to help those in need now, who may have thoughts of suicide or help those understand the process. Please if you feel a need check out the website http://suicideprevention.ca/need-help/As like any loss, there are no quick fixes we just have to work at the grief process one day at a time.

In this episode I talk about having more time and waiting until tomorrow to do the things we want to do. I also talk about some amazing organizations in Sudbury.

In this episode, I discuss what we do at Dragonfly Advisory Services, how we're different from other services offered, why we do what we're doing, and why we support the other services offered locally in our city. If you're providing services that are helping others, that's what matters. http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/latest/

Social Media has become a part of who we are, an extension of ourselves, possibly a little too much at times. As I sit at a restaurant having dinner recently, look around and almost everyone is playing on a phone, it makes me wonder. We use social media as a way to stay contented to be part of: family, friends, peer groups, even some use it negatively and irresponsibly. Regardless there are very few if us that do not have a Facebook page, Instagram, Twitter, or use it for business reasons like LinkedIn, myself included. Social Media has itself received a lot of negativity in recent months, in respect to posting pictures – of life altering events, such as car crashes, accidents, hell even a recently deceased individual. Authorities are asking society as a whole to think before they “Post”. I question this one as really, they need to ask? Condolences – Hey I am the first to offer my condolences, my sympathy, when a family member, friend, or associate has lost a loved one. But a recent conversation made me think. Is it the right thing to do? Would it actually be so difficult for me to pick up the phone or maybe a dessert, make a call or drop in? So question True or False….Have we possibly evolved in such a way that we forgot about human contact, emotions, where a hug goes a long way? Or a tear or two? Please no judging, I am not judging social media, I am not stating never offer our condolences on social media, no need to ruffle our feathers. For myself, I took the conversation seriously, from someone whom, had the experience, got notification from an inappropriate source. Personally maybe the best advice yet, wait till public notification has been made, Obituary has been released, Funeral Home has made public knowledge, it may be the safer route. Better yet, make a call, drop a card, and a hug goes a long way. Read the full episode here http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/true-or-false-socially-acceptable-posting-condolences/

This episode features 'Living with Dying a caregivers guide' with Jahnna Beecham and Katie Ortlip. I had an opportunity to chat with these two amazing women When I was asked to consider doing a Dragonfly Radio interview with them from DMPR, I did some research on the book. Jahnna Beecham and Katie Ortlip wrote a book "Death for Dummies" which I loved. I asked myself where was this book 10 years ago? when I was watching my own parents pass away. It has been made reference as "Death for Dummies". An excellent caregivers manual from start to finish. I would suggest this book to any caregiver, or individual whom may be at end-of-life planning. Thank You Jahnna & Katie. You can find out more on their Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/livingwithdyingbook/ or online livingwithdying.com And on the Dragonfly Advisory Services Facebook https://www.facebook.com/dragonflyadvisoryservices/ and online www.dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca

Just recently I had a wonderful opportunity to sit down and meet Colleen. She is part of an organization here in Greater Sudbury called Butterfly Wings. A support group for parents and their families whose lives have been touched by the death of a baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, medical termination, stillbirth, and/or neonatal death. You can find them on facebook : Butterfly Wings Perinatal Bereavement Services or through their website www.butterflywings.ca Watch the video here https://www.facebook.com/dragonflyadvisoryservices/videos/531469103863716/

Courtney Smith and Nathan Courtemanche experienced the loss of their baby, Greyson Lloyd Courtemanche, who passed away on June 9th, 2015. In this episode Courtney and Nathan share their story of Greyson. Nathan wrote 2 songs for Greyson and all babies who have passed. The first song he wrote is called "Greyson's Song" which he wrote almost immediately after he passed. The second song is titled "Growing up in Heaven" and he wrote that a few months after Greyson passed. Its for Greyson and all babies who have passed. These songs can be heard in this episode and here https://nathancourtemanche.bandcamp.com

Meet Kim, a mom whom, is bring awareness and education of grief and loss of a child. She is working at letting moms and dads know they are not alone, and what we can do to improve our resources within our community. Dragonfly Radio recently sat down with Kimberley Dittburner, she and Troy welcomed me warmly into their home, I was honoured, to have her share her journey of loss and grief. Their story, is a powerhouse, be prepared, and keep in mind, this is their story. Meet Alister everyone, a child loved by many. Watch the video here https://www.facebook.com/dragonflyadvisoryservices/videos/511704802506813/

This morning over my coffee, I had a wonderful opportunity to discuss with Gail Kavelman "Laughter Yoga" and her journey. What a wonderful way to start my day, and educate myself on Laughter Yoga. Dragonfly Radio was pleased to welcome her to our discuss on Grief, Loss and What to do next. Enjoy Listening. Also please feel free to check out her at http://pathwaystolaughter.freeblog.site/ or on facebook for more information. Thank You Gail, it was a pleasure. http://gailkavelman.wixsite.com/life-with-laughter

You see for those that do not know this, I was adopted. The term used growing up loving by siblings was “the chosen one”. 50 years ago on August 1, 1967 I was born Darla Tina, my birthmother at that time had a grief of her own, one that she had to go through in silence and secrecy, but it was still a grief and loss. Often the professionals play it out as it is the solutions to everyone’s problems, and it suits all parties involved. I have to question, did my birthmother have to hide her grief for the loss of her child, that became another’s? I am positive her grief was very real, but well hidden. As the adopted child I can truthfully say that I also grieve for the loss of my birthmother, no doubt or question, that the identity of who I was prior to by adoption is now non-existent, and the value of my heritage. I was one of the very fortunate ones in life, I was loved from the moment of conception, named by my birthmother, was privileged of information. I was told that when my mom and dad seen me for the first time, I brought them unconditional joy and hence the name change. A lot of who I am and what I do, is because of my mom and dad, they were always very open about my adoption, and never let me forget that my mother loved me enough to give me a name, and they loved me enough to make me theirs. On August 1 of each year, I am positive that she grieves in her own manner, as I do. Since the inception of Dragonfly Advisory Services, over the last year, we have had many conversations about loss, and grief in many forms, but yet to discuss adoption and the emotions of loss. My parents would be proud to know, that I have started a dialogue today of “The Hidden Grief” for all the parties involved, I have always been proud of my adoption, and have no shame. For all intent and purposes my birthparents, made a choice and I was the one which “won the draw”. Remember grief does come in all forms. read more http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/the-hidden-grief/

If there has been anything I have personally gained from my experiences is that there are many women (and men also) but my main focus is on the women today, that have all made a change in their lives may it have been a career change, volunteer, new venture, or role based on a personal choice or event that led them to take another path. It never ceases to amaze me the women I speak with or meet via another introduction, where the individual has made a difference or working towards change. It may not always be on a professional level, it could be personal also. It may be a simple act of kindness helping mom or dad move into a better living environment knowing that it will make their lives much safer but your just became a little more challenging. I have family who have had an altering life change with a spouse having a stroke at a young age, but instead of sitting back and accepting as is focused on what was important and initiated change in our world with remarkable success, and is an inspiration to many. There is a personal friend whom I do not see as much as I would love too as we did in our early hockey years, but today she is still active in a role what was for many years male set, she is achieved goals set out in our early years, and continues today to make hockey a better place in Northern Ontario and Ontario. With an accident years ago personally with a spouse, another family member seen a need in our community and she also has made a great impact in health care here in the North and has broaden her scope. And these women our just within my personal circle, if I look outside of this circle, I have had the opportunity to meet some amazing women in our community here alone, from women who have started their own companies and services, that are dedicated in making a change in the way business is perceived with women as a front runner. Thank You to all the amazing women out there. Read more http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/strength-in-numbers/

So thankful for our special guest today, Anne Marie Wallace-Phillips. She is Coordinator Hospice & Grief Support with VON Sakura House Residential Hospice but she also is a mom who lost her own child in 1993 to SIDS, Shauna at age 7 months.

It’s like riding a roller coaster, some days you are up and some days you are down. We very seldom knows what is beyond the bend, unless of course you rode on this ride before. Plus it is almost like being at an amusement park, your emotions are running high and then all of a sudden you feel lost and overwhelmed, as you look at the long line up at your favorite ride. Yep that would be what dealing with grief might feel like for some, even the overwhelming feeling of puking up your guts! The difference is at the amusement park you know it is going to end, and the line will move forward. When you are going through grief, it never does, and you hit the Roller Coaster Effect, when you least expect it. Maybe you are driving along and that one song comes on, or you are looking for that picture of the kids on the camping trip, and you see the anniversary party. My favorite is when you are watching Grey’s Anatomy and then there is the episode where the loved one is not going to make after all the attempts, and it starts crashing the ride. We try to dry the tears, or make believe that nothing is bothering us. We put the pictures back in the box, change the radio station, or fast forward the PVR. What I do not understand is why? Who cares if the kids think we have lost our mind, or our passengers feel that maybe a new carpool is required, or all of a sudden we have shares in Scotties. At one time or another each and every one of us is going to ride that dreaded Roller Coaster, and it will be the longest ride of their lives, the emotions will go up and down, around and fast and slow, and it will never stop! But after time maybe just maybe the urge to bring up our morning breakfast may not be so overwhelming, and that feeling in the pit of our stomach that makes us light headed will pass quicker. As I said before I am not a grief counsellor or a therapist, but I do know I hate roller coasters. Till next time…. http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/roller-coaster-effect/

One thing that is for certain, when you are caring for an ailing family member, palliative care, or long-term illness, finding time for yourself is virtually impossible. Everyone tells us constantly to make time for yourself, do not burden yourself, and ask for help if you need it. YEP we hear it all, but what do we do? We try to do it all alone, because that’s what they would want or we like to tell ourselves that. We know what the right thing to say and do, but we continue on a path of self-destruction and challenge all that get in our way! Right? Next thing we know, we have a bottle of wine on the table and think that will help heal our sorrows lol. It is so important to listen to the advice given by our peers, and look into the days ahead and know that it is okay to take a break. We all have different ways of dealing with stress, some love Yoga, long walks, a good book, or maybe just a girl’s weekend. A guy or gal might like taking a fishing trip, or bike ride off a path somewhere, the point is whatever floats your boat, do it! Take advantage of the services offered in your community if you need, impose on family and friends, just take a breath of fresh air and live a little, because we all know that those days of caring and nurturing will return before we know it. It is hard to ask for help sometimes, maybe we wonder what people will think, if I am out enjoying myself, and my mom or dad, husband or wife is lying there dying and I am thinking of “ME” I can guarantee that the loved one that is there waiting is cheering you on silently and hoping that you are having a well deserved break. WE are the only ones holding ourselves back, no one is judging us, or criticizing what we do. There are great articles in regards to caregiver self-help. It is important to allow our minds and bodies to have stress relief and solitude, to allow our own energies to replenish, before we are lying next to the loved one ourselves.

Please meet Stephanie from Springfield Missouri, she was gracious enough to be part of Sunday Share and share her personal story with "Dragonfly Radio". She expresses her gratitude with an organization called "Lost and Found" her creativity with grief and loss. There are a few breaks in audio, sorry about that :) Thank you His Mom Strong for sharing your journey. Check out Stephanie from His Mom Strong www.hismomstrong.com

When do we call it quits? Have you ever questioned yourself? Wondered if you have had enough? Thought to yourselfrncan I take anymore? I think at some point in life, we all have, each and everyone of us havernreached our wits end, thinking enough is enough. I know I have, and I most likely think it atrnleast once a week over one issue or another. Life likes to throw us curve balls, and make usrnquestion life. Some of us hit the challenge head on while others might put their heads in thernsand hoping it will go away. Is there a right and wrong? If you have a family member or friendrnwho is ill, and you know there is no quality of life, to pray that they do not wake up that nextrnmorning, or have mixed emotions when they do, telling yourself at least I have one more day.rnWe struggle with our own inner emotions regularly and allow our bodies to become so stressedrnover things that regardless of prayer or care, really are out of our hands and in Gods. Forrnsome, each day that we get out of bed can be a challenge. If we have lost someone recently orrnknow someone we love will soon be leaving this earth, it can be hard to go about our dailyrnactivities and pretend all is okay. So what about watching the grieving? You know they are inrnthe depth of a loss and trying to keep themselves together, but how much can we help? We canrnbe compassionate and have empathy, but what are the boundaries and when are we enabling?rnIt’s a tough question, and many struggle with it. You want to help, but think maybe I should justrnthrow in the towel, I quit ! It is an inner struggle constantly. So find peace in knowing you arernnot alone, take a deep breath, replenish your body and soul in whatever way works for you,rnthen push yourself to the limit and do it all over again! The end result will be worth it. Just Don’t Quit. Read more http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/i-quit/

There are some great books today that deal with grief and losing a loved one. One of my favorites is “Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief” by Martha Whitmore Hickman. There are so many popular books you often wonder where do I start to read? It is said that there are 5 stages of grief. And I have found most books tell us the same. Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.” Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?” Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.” Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.” Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened.” I am honestly after 10 years trying to get to the acceptance stage. I have a hard time finding peace with what happened, I understand that it did, that the decision was made by a higher source. Nothing that anyone could have said or done could change their deaths, but I do my best every day to TRY and accept what happened. I am at peace knowing that my mom is no longer suffering, seeing demons and shadows, asking “If you just give me a knife, and go I will do it myself”, YES that I am at peace with that. But it takes strength daily to find acceptance and understanding that losing someone is out of our control. Time is on our side, so I guess at some point we will hit that magic number of 5 and be done with the five stages of grief, BUT not grief itself, because like that worst embarrassing moment we have all had at one time or another in life, it stays in our memory and grief makes its presence every now and then. So if you are finding yourself struggling with those five stages or stuck on a particular one, be proactive, talk to someone, reach out, and ask for help. Read more http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/the-5-stages-of-grief-will-i-get-acceptance/

As I grow with my new journey with Dragonfly Advisory Services (DAS ), I have had many conversations with individuals who have just lost a loved one. Even though I have felt the same emotions as they have maybe not necessarily on the same scale, “I Get It” and I even sometimes am not sure what to say. The politically correct thing to say obviously is “I am so sorry for your loss, my condolences”. We try so hard to find the comforting words or right statement. For myself right now I most likely never met the person, but if that individual is seeking assistance, I can only imagine how much they loved the deceased. If you lose someone unexpectedly the pain is probably so deep and raw there is no explanation of the emotion. Personally if you are going to offer your condolences, make sure you understand the means of death, you might think that’s nuts, but realistically the emotions involved vary on the means of death. From palliative all the way to murder. There are some wonderful reads on the subject, such as “Things No Grieving Person Wants To Hear, by Scott Simon Books” I am sure that each and every one of us at one time or another stopped at the door to a Funeral Home, and said “I do not know what to say” It Is not easy that’s for sure, but having your presence sometimes means more than the words could. So if you find yourself in a situation, where you have to go to a funeral home, but you are thinking of not going to avoid it, because it is easier, than facing the family and friends , think twice. You should not avoid the uncomfortable situation but educate yourself and know there is one language of grief you may not know about and it is “Silence” that unspoken language is often enough, there may be tears, unrest, but just being there helps with the healing. Read more http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/the-right-thing-to-say/

This week, Joy Wirta discusses karma and what goes around comes around Links mentioned in this episode: Questions? Contact me at http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/ This podcast is powered by ZenCast.fm

Questions? Contact me at http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/

Many of us, not all, but I can guarantee some individuals when we are going through the Sunday paper and are checking out the obituaries, to see if anyone we know may have passed away recently. I find that we often ask “How old were they?” like it makes a difference…. Does it? When a loved one dies, does it matter how old they were, do you find that you have more compassion if the individual was younger of age or a child? What about a child lost in the womb, do you think that those parents do not suffer as much as a child lost in later years? If a grandparent dies in their sleep later on in years and had a great life, do you think that the family does not grieve as great? I often hear comments in passing, from associates or just in general and often find myself biting my tongue, honestly! Life sucks regardless when you have lost a family member or close friend, regardless of faith or age. Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” ~ Mark Twain …..I love that quote, and is so true. It is like dating right? . Read more Contact me dragonflyadvisoryservices@gmail.com

As the days follow after a loved one dies, I find I often heard from friends and family was that old saying “the first holidays are always the hardest” maybe, maybe not. I grew up as a Jehovah’s Witness so if you did not know that about me you now do. So those that are familiar with the religion you know that they do not celebrate certain holidays. (You may have caught the they and not we, I have moved on from that life now) Growing up I did not celebrate Birthdays, Christmas, Easter, etc. etc. You get the idea. Please no sympathy we had all we needed in life and did not go without I assure you, most likely spoiled as a result. So for me those first holiday’s after my parents passed away I did not find as difficult as I did those special moments in life. My granddaughter’s and grandson births for me was the hardest, I remember wishing my mom could have been there celebrating with me, she loved her grandchildren like no other so I knew she would have been an amazing great-grandmother. As the years passed there was a lot a resentment towards those that were still among us and able to be part of those special moments, like births and weddings. There were many times I questioned why they were here, but my own were not. Read more >> http://dragonflyadvisoryservices.ca/post/those-firsts-vs-the-special/

A loss of a love one SUCKS!!! I am not going to sugar coat it, or make all smell pretty like roses, it just down right sucks. Regardless if you have been caring for maybe a parent suffering from a disease such as cancer, you have watched them riddle away to nothing, suffer daily, struggle to do the easiest thing like putting on their shoes. YET that day comes, their breathing becomes shallow, you know it is time, you prayed nightly for them to go in peace it happens. It still SUCKS! Or you may have lost someone quickly an accident, never got to really say the things you wanted to...It still SUCKS! If you are a parent yourself at the time, you may still be expected to go daily, make hockey practice or maybe drop of your little one at dance, knowing that it still does not make the grieving any easier. To read more