Employee #1 - The Industrial Accident Podcast

This is the last episode before the Season 3 Finale featuring Kent Chungus! In this episode Brad the Impaler, Wesley Weaseltits, Phil Downerpants, and the Research Department are joined by special guest Mitosis!

Ta-Da! Look what it is . . . ! Its another long one. A long one about shorts. Gene Pool, Jack Hoff, Gabe Porn, and the Research Department learn some important lessons they forgot exactly when their hangovers cleared.

In this extra-long episode Julian Spagoolie, Harry Heartworm, and Dane Gleesak discuss stories with titles that rhyme with “truce”. Dane proves his ignorance of Beatles music.AbuseBruceGooseJuiceLooseNooseProfuseSpruceImmediately followed by a one-off true crime podcast called "Arthur Gary Bishop: A Dirty Rotten Fuck." This one ain't for all audiences. If you have a soft heart, a weak stomach, or children DON'T LISTEN!

From the home of the 2002 Winter Games, Jack Doff, Indy Geshtion, and Phil Yertitties take the Bronze. Phil discusses his Naval aspirations, and old-guy chokes again.BikeGrappleJumpRunSwimThrow

Cheesus, what's that smell? Andy Phylaxis, Matt Ernity, and Artie Inn chew on some cheesy accidents.Big CheeseCheese CakeCut the CheeseHard CheeseHead CheeseString Cheese

Well, the Super Bowl is over. Boo frickety hoo,If you still need some football in your life, take heart: Sal Liva, Jerry Maya, and Rob Mypoosee thrill you with their offense and defense. Things really get offensive and defensive.SpikePassScreenKickTeeHelmetDon't forget to check out History Goon wherever you listen to podcasts! Tell Kevin Employee #1 sent you.

Dan Creas, Will Son and Lou Sainus discuss Employee #1's adventures in the great outdoors, until disaster strikes.The takeover begins.

Hosts Ivan Topuke, Dick Berry, and Barry McCockiner jump over the hedge and show you what's going on in Employee #1's backyard. Hint: There's a fracas of ficus.

Dish Warsham, Allan Wrench, and Mike Oxbig take you on a ride down to the farm to show you where Employee #1 used to work. This is the episode where someone old-guy chokes and almost dies during recording. At long last, the term Kalookio is explained. You are gonna want to hear this!#atv #accident #allsaintsday #beer #belching #blackhumor #bountifulload #comedy #crude #dark #fuckdoll #fudgepackin #gallowshumor #grapists #hashtag #industrialaccident #injury #kalookio #mature #morbid #motorcycle #osha #peedinkle #pottymouths #researchdepartment #roadhead #schadenfreude #tasteless #temporaryemployee #thump #torso #trauma #vulgar #xray

Welcome to all the new listeners we've gotten since our mention on True Crime Kent!To celebrate, Father Christmas, Krist Kringle, Sinter Claus and Krampus (The Research Department) would like to take you on a holiday slay ride. Blow the dust off your egg nog and enjoy stories about these categories:• Caribou• Chimney• Christmas Tree 1• Christmas Tree 2• Christmas Tree 3• Gift• SleighAlso, pay attention to the ad at the beginning. That Guy was feeling mighty generous. Join our Patreon $5 tier and get all the $20 tier benefits as long as you keep up with your monthly payments! Offer expires January 31, 2025.

Hosts Roland Z. Hay, Sam Squatch, and Ole C. Cretion get a bit retrospective and discuss things that are defective from a collective perspective.C-word warning.

What do venereal diseases have to do with industrial accidents? Fuck around and find out.Helping the listener to scratch what itches are our friends Spiro Keetes AKA "Milky Substance", Casio Motorola, and Rocky "Rock" Hardcock.Categories include:ClamCrabsThe ClapThe GiftTrickHepatitis B

Ding Dong! Boy have we got some tricks and treats for you!Hosts Emerson Bigguns, Patrick "Pud" Spelunker, and Neil Inlick talk about six people who were Employee #1 for Halloween.Yes. We realize that this is episode 13 and you haven't heard episode 12 yet. We didn't think you'd enjoy a Halloween episode in November.

Sometimes a reach becomes a stretch. Austin Tasheous, Ernald Vanderhorn, and Heywood Jagarglemynuts have a round-table discussion about what happens when Employee #1's reach exceeds their grasp.#accident #angellust #applebutter #babysittersclub #beer #belching #blackhumor #Brewery #california #comedy #crude #dark #davidspud #ebonics #forklift #gallowshumor #industrialaccident #insulinpump #morbid #osha #pineapplemargarita #pottymouths #ppe #researchdepartment #schadenfreude #selfpropelled #tasteless #vulgar

Twelve! Count 'em TWELVE stories for an extra-long tenth episode! That's 100% extra than those other puny six-story episodes we put out.Hosts Bob Jombie, Dudley Smith, and Peter "Pecker" Wood discuss multiple tales with multiple employees.accidentassholesandelbowsbeerbelchingblackcocoacontrolroomblackhumorbulletcomedyconfinedspacecranecrudedarkequipotentialzonegallowshumorgeorgiamudhawktuahindustrialaccidentkentuckyjellykyjellymaturemorbidmulipletakesmutualofomahaoshapottymouthsresearchdepartmentschadenfreudesuperfluousendingtastelessvulgarwoodchipper

Mayor Larry Vaughn, the unnamed “This Guy” and Dutchman Ben Gherkinoff step off the sand and into the salty, blood-stained water of Employee #1's claim to fame among family and friends. Somebody refers to a “dorso” fin.You're gonna need a bigger beer.#accident #amityvillehorror #amputation #belching #blackhumor #boiler #california #cobrawine #comedy #crude #dark #fiberglass #forklift #industrial accident #leadinpencil #mariekaleida #mature #morbid #osha #pottymouths #schadenfreude #sharkfinsoup #smoke #tasteless #tigercock #upcutsaw #vulgar

In what might just be the most poorly equalized podcast in audio history, hosts Skid Flufutter, Melvin Methmouth and Justin Hermuff discuss horrible things that happened on Employee #1's last day at work. Among other things . . .#accident #alcohol #belching #blackhumor #bumpcap #california #comedy #confinedspace #crude #dark #gallowshumor #genderfluid #glassblower #headscarf #homedepot #hughglass #implement #industrialaccident #lathe #malarkey #mature #mensarejects #morbid #nutsack #nuttapper #osha #pistachio #pottymouths #revenant #schadenfreude #silo #smothered #supersack #tasteless #vulgar

Hosts Ron Hodgkins, Ol' Carl Suction Tube (again), and Dixon Hersnatch peel back their hoods and rub their heads together over a pile of accidents that somehow involve something to do with bubbles.We had a new Patron. But before the episode got edited, she downgraded her subscription! Talk about bursting our bubble!#Tom #accident #belching #blackhumor #bluewaffles #Calsifornia #clown #comedy #crude #gallowshumor #Hitler #industrialaccident #mature #morbid #osha #pissface #pottymouths #researchdepartment #schadenfreude #tasteless #undinism #undinist #vulgar #watersports

Zimm Zamm discusses some fishy incidents with Pilgrim Penhurst and Holden Demtitties.On a rare and heartfelt serious note: RIP Abby. You were amazing--even when you interrupted every recording. We love you and will never forget you. Sadie and Conway are carrying on in your honor.

Spliff McKinley, Ol' Carl Suction Tube, and Bruce McCoochie discuss a grab bag of stories.Research Department describes an interaction with a homeless guy.If you like what we do, please give us a rating, a review, and tell a frenemy! If you LOVE what we do, head over to Patreon.com/employee1 and prove it!#accident #blackhumor #comedy #crude #dark #gallowshumor #industrialaccident #mature #morbid #osha #pottymouths #researchdepartment #schadenfreude #tasteless #vulgar

Main Guy: Roger ThemallThis Guy: Toro JohnsonThat Guy: Willie LayerThe panel discusses stories related to printing.

Hosts get distracted.

Hosts discuss stories about special effects...and other special things.

No spoilers here.

Just the facts, ma'am.Contestants:• The Virgin Connie Swail• Pep StreebeckHost: • Emil MuzzCategories:• Black• Magic• Woman• Devil• Blue • Dress

Host and "Main Guy" Hollis Mulwray carries the water for contestant and professional flashlight repairman J.J. Gittes (playing for his nameless charity) and dyslexic Noah "Norah" Cross, the 1974 Paste Eating Champion of the United States (playing for his charity Hymen Transplants).Categories include:• Launch• Moon• Orbit• Space• Star• SunLEGAL ADDENDUM: Our attorneys insist that we apologize in advance to 13-year-old girls, Jack Nicholson, and that teen-fucking, kid-diddling, jug-eared, sex-offending puke Roman Polanski.#accident #blackhumor #california #comedy #crude #dark #gallowshumor #industrialaccident #mature#morbid #osha#pottymouths #schadenfreude #tasteless #vulgar

My boss at work tells me that my written communications are too wordy. "Summarize! Use bullet points," he says...Host:Billy Ray ValentineContestants:Randolph DukeMortimer DukeHans NonoCharities:Stop Playing the Same Three Christmas Songs in StoresStop All This Christmas Bullshit Before ThanksgivingCategories include:BoatCarMotorcyclePlaneScooterTruck#accident #blackhumor #california #comedy #crude #dark #forklift #gallowshumor #industrialaccident #mature #morbid #osha #pottymouths #researchdepartment #schadenfreude #tasteless #vulgar

Jim Chimney hosts a game between Chim Panzee and Angus Stinkhole! There's real money at stake here. Which charity will get a bit of a boost: "Dog Voicebox Removal for Dogs Less Than 80 Pounds" or "The Immediate Ban of the Know-It-All Football Guy at the Bar"?!Betcha can't hardly wait!Categories include:• Jesus• Rides• Beside• Never• Buys• Smokes

Welcome to the shit-show. Sir F. Real plays for "Fuck NASA" against Richard Ramdatazz who hopes his charity "The Foundation for Elderly Kittens" gets some change in its litter box. Joe Blob hosts.Categories include:• major• log• jam• flush• overflow• plunge

Some guy named Ron Dickles thinks he can win all the money for his charity "Shear Pins on Mobility Scooter Seats" while another jerk-off wanna-be honkey pimp calls himself Harry Poppins thinks he's gonna take a windfall for his charity "Holler for a Ho."Categories include:• Never• Look• Back• Ready• Aim• FireA rascal named Len Guini tries to keep a lid on things so they don't boil over. Oh, almost forgot, if you were in the northern Utah area last week, there was a very cool Halloween-themed car show/art auction called Kulture Krash. All proceeds benefited the children's charity Angel's Hands Foundation. It was at Copperton Park on Saturday, October 7th starting at 9:00 am. Some voices you might recognize might have had a booth and might be giving away stickers and might have sold one t-shirt and nobody bought a coffee mug. #accident #blackhumor #california #comedy #crude #dark #eyelid #forklift #gallowshumor #industrialaccident #lathe #mature #morbid #osha #pottymouths #ppe #schadenfreude #vulgar

Contestant Marv the Butcher plays for his charity Make Every City Park a Peanut Farm, against Ricardo Hard who hopes to win the prize money for his pet project, the Institute of Undescended Testicles. Jor L. Thundernuts hosts.Come get your Ayn Rand fix.Categories include:EarthWindFireStiffLittle Fingers

In a historic first, Shawna Forbush joins as the first female contestant! Within two minutes she quits. Touch Connors wants to blow up the moon, while Craven Morcucchi wants to fund the Society for Redundancy Society. Host Dudley Santana can't quite herd these cats.Categories include:HandThat's it. Hand. 

Hazel Motes hosts as Cy Winkelman and Nick O'Tene (no relation to Flannery O'Connor) go eye-to-eye and see who can line up the sights to hit the bullseye.Categories include:Eye 1Eye 2Eye 3Eye 4Eye 5Eye 6You don't dare miss this one! Be cool: make sure nobody at the water cooler knows what the fuck you're talking about tomorrow. 

Robin D. Bank and Anita Hanjob go head-to-head in a losing battle while Rip Forskinsky hosts. This one has some gross comments.Categories include: OldBlueDampHangingBallSack

John Donson hosts contestants Rand Dover (playing for his charity Permanently Ban Bow Ties 'Cause They're Fucking Ugly and Retarded) and Munchin Herbusch (playing for his charity For the Love of Christ and Everything Sacred and Holy Can We Please Stop Curb Rash).Categories include:thick fatlazy grosssweatypig

Caesar Salad hosts contestants Lester Ectley (playing for the charity Less Mobility Scooters in Walmart) and Cole N. Oscopy (who is all revved up about his charity Cole-alition to Restore PornHub to the Fine Porn-Loving Adults in Utah).Categories include:• Dirty• Drunk• Poor• Rotten• Trailer• Trash• Whiteaccidentbelchingblackhumorcaliforniacomedycrudedarkforkliftgallowshumorindustrialaccidentmaturemorbidoshaschadenfreudetastelessvulgar

Joltin' Joe Formaggio hosts Doctor Con Dom and Benjamin Doverbitch. Things get cheesy.CrustDanglingFungusNailThickTow YellowIf you're not too busy, please give us a rating and review wherever you listen. We'd appreciate your help in getting the word out to other like-minded folks with questionable senses of humor! THANKS!accidentblackhumorcaliforniacomedycrudedarkforkliftgallowshumorindustrialaccidentmaturemorbidoshapottymouthsschadenfreudetastelessvulgarhttps://www.patreon.com/Employee1https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100074249877518

Nine episodes...nine stories.Cornelius Keg hosts as mutineers Willie Stroker and Horatio Hornblower survive nine challenges AND shots of imitation peanut butter-flavored whiskey each time Cornie's insulin pump alarm fires off in the background.Categories include:BangFingeredFirst BaseHandyMissionary Rear-EndedSixty-Nine SpooningSuck

Mack Heath gasps and hacks his way through one ripper of a show. Guests Bob Wilson and Ricardo "Rock" Hardcock see who's charity will bubble to the top in a smoke-filled high stakes game. Categories include:BaldingCurlyGreyPubicRedWavyaccidentacetabulaamputationblackhumorbogartbongcaliforniaconcussiondarkgallowshumorindustrialaccidentlatheleatherlungmaturemorbidoshapanicattackpottymouthspubicramusresearchdepartmentscalpedschadenfreudesmokytastelesstermiteabatementvulgarxray

The game show run BY mental defectives FOR mental defectives. Al Buterol hoarsely gasps his way through several insulin pump alerts, mouse clicks, and sarcastic rude contestants.Buck Needlehoffer thrills the audience on behalf of his charity "Make the First Friday of Every Month Free Crack Day" while Curtis "Cooter" Stuffer goes all out for his charity "Cooter's Kids." Categories include:Elevated LiftHammer"It's Windy!"LatexPsychScared DISCLAIMER: This broadcast is not affiliated with nor sponsored by farthammer.com.TomaccidentantiqueblackhumorblowedupcaliforniacomedycrudedistaldumbfuckinmoveenemafarthammerfuckinTomgallowshumorguitarpickgynecologicalinstrumentsindustrialaccidentinsulinpumploadmastermaturemorbidmulletnonunionoshaphalanxpipefitterpottymouthsromanlegionschadenfreudeshaftalleyspeculumspeculatorsubmarinetastelesstuftvulgaryoucancallmebetty

David Blowie hosts a game of Spin the Bottle.Contestant Ian McCracken, hoping to raise funds for the “Phil/Ian McCracken Gerbil Rescue,” challenges Victor Charlie who hopes to secure funding for his charity “Properly Pave the Ho Chi Minh Trail”!Categories include:FiremanForklift vs. ScooterGas Station #2MuzzleloaderRebar 4Security Shopliftaccident blackhumor bottle california comedy crude dark forklift gallowshumor industrialaccident osha schadenfreude tasteless vulgar

Join professional jug blower Car Los as he competes for the charity "Tent Removal for the Homeless" against professional finger painter E. Jack Youlate, whose "Foundation to Put Warning Labels on Everything" just might win the whole enchilada. Buffalo Bill hosts this nail-biting juggernaut.accidentblackhumorcolorblindcomedycrudedarkdartforkliftfuckingidiotgallowshumorindustrialaccidentoshaschadenfreudetastelesstraumavulgar

If you were supporting us on Patreon, you would have heard this two weeks ago, and enjoyed an additional 11 minutes!Leopold Jankum competes for his charity “Breast Implants for the Elderly” against Wayne Kerr, who is playing for his charity “The Prevention of People Who Let Their Dogs Kiss Their Face and Mouths.” Who will win? It's all in the hands of Dr. Acula!accidentblackhumorcomedycrudedarkindustrialaccidentmaturemorbidoshaschadenfreudetastelessvulgar

Lou Weegee hosts challengers Yellin' Ellen Belwyn and Mike Litoris square off to see if the charity "Speech Therapy for People Who Say 'Woof'" or "Labia Frostbite Prevention by Reversing Laser Hair Removal (Bring Back the Bush).”accidentblackhumorbringbackthebushbulletcaliforniaclitoriscomedycrudecunnilinguscuntreeclubdoengallowshumorhashtaghawksoffthechickenindustrialaccidentmaturemorbidoshapottymouthsschadenfreudetastelessvulgar

Host Paddy Cakes is joined by contestants Tug Wingwalker and Peter Dragin who match wits to see who's charity takes the full load.K9accidentaerialliftbelchingblackhumorcadweldcaliforniacomedycrudedecapitationforkliftguywireindustrialaccidentmaturemorbidoshapiggingpottymouthsschadenfreudetastelessuncedevulgarwatersportswhospunthismuthafucka

Host Fig Newton is joined by contestants Gregory Van Peckerlips and Steffan Morebeaver who battle it out for their favorite charities! The stories are as random as the editing.What was Employee #1's life worth?Will “Save the Coney Island Whitefish” or “Stilts for Little People” get the payoff?What the fuck is with the stupid ending?Tune in and find out!

HA! You thought we'd forgotten to post our final episode of Season 1. We did.Hosts Jock Q. Sto, Fred Iguana, and Justin Herass close out the theme-themed first season. Dive in! Coming soon, Season 2! Random stories presented in a gameshow format in which guests compete for the charities of their choice!accidentaeratorblackhumorcomedycumradefakelakefuckinzilchindustrialaccidentinsprectionittybittysumbitchosharussianswingactsawedofframoneschadenfreudesquinkleystoplogsuckedupbythegogglestastelessumbilicalvulgar

Hosts Upton Downey, Tammy “Tam” Pon, Peter Fitzinwell spend a few moments discussing the ups and downs of working on, in, and around escalators.

Hosts Donny Brook, Ray Mancini, and Juan Morehead put up their dukes and take a poke at stories where Employee #1 gets in a beef at work. This one is a real hit.BONUS: Juan gets wistfully sidetracked discussing his old friends at a pallet factory. Ray has a momentary lapse of identity. And Donny will likely get his head caved in with a fucking ABC fire extinguisher when this one hits the free public feed.

Hosts Dean Gilberry, Alexander Cummings and Billy Bongsmoke (or as he's known on the Unethical and Private Dicks podcasts, Richard Steudle) cram into the black cocoa control room to discuss some crap that happened to Employee #1 when a toilet was involved.As if that weren't bad enough, somebody says the R-word. I guess you could say that this turd is rated R.

Hosts Zip the Pinhead, John Diss, and Seymour Wieners discuss heavy metal. And copper. Copper spraying, copper tubing, copper flashing, copper jacketed hollow-points and an alligator shear chewing on recycled copper strand. You get it. BONUS: A research break featuring silent muttering and microphone fumbling. EXTRA BONUS: Terms that are no longer permissible, as far as the legal department is concerned.Also, a promo for a friend's podcast at the beginning. If you haven't heard the Private Dicks podcast, give them a listen! Tell ‘em some guy with a fake name sent ya! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/private-dicks/id1607947543