Jokes with Mark Simmons

Follow Jokes with Mark Simmons
Share on
Copy link to clipboard

How do you make a joke funny? Every week Mark Simmons and a guest share jokes they've written that just haven't worked - because they're too long, too stupid, too clever, too groanworthy or just too rubbish. Follow Mark on Twitter | Subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode

Great Lines


    • Aug 5, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekly NEW EPISODES
    • 40m AVG DURATION
    • 305 EPISODES


    Search for episodes from Jokes with Mark Simmons with a specific topic:

    Latest episodes from Jokes with Mark Simmons

    Fringe Talk - Day 3 (Ft. Emmanuel Sonubi)

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 5, 2025 24:13


    2x Edinburgh Award nominee, Emmanuel Sonubi, joins the boys to chat about his new show 'Life After Near Death', and we get all the latest fringe gossip.See Emmanuel at the Pleasance Courtyard (20.10), Danny at the Banshee Labyrinth (midday) and Mark at the Liquid Rooms (13.45) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Fringe Talk - Day 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 4, 2025 30:54


    It's day 2 of the Edinburgh Fringe and the boys are already knackered. Recording this at 10.38pm they discuss how their shows went today, reveal the many ways performers try to grab attention at the festival and they read out some fan mail.See Mark at the Liquid Rooms (13.45) & see Danny at the Banshee Labyrinth (midday) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Fringe Talk - Day 1

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 3, 2025 22:34


    This spin off of the spin off will document what it's like to perform at the Edinburgh Fringe on a daily basis. Expect highs and lows in this warts and all series.Danny is performing at the Banshee labyrinth every day at midday and Mark is at the Liquid Rooms at 13.45. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Ian Smith

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 2, 2025 48:01


    Edinburgh Award Nominee, Ian Smith, joins the podcast to chat through some jokes ideas. All three are at the Edinburgh festival (AUG 25) Go see their shows:Ian Smith - Monkey BarrellDanny Ward - Banshee LabyrinthMark Simmons - Liquid Rooms Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Gill Cordiner

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 25, 2025 42:12


    Cover your kids ears, it's Gill Cordiner. She's dangerous and has just set a Jokes Podcast swear record. Really fun episode as Gill takes us through some of her filthiest routines where she has sections that don't work as well as she'd like Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Ben Hurley

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 18, 2025 35:20


    The boys are in New Zealand and TV regular, Ben Hurley joins them to chat through two of his routines, both with one line he can't get to work. Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Andrew Hamilton

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 10, 2025 41:18


    Prison, drug dealing and comedy. Andrew Hamilton is a triple threat and tells Mark and Danny all the details of starting stand up after a stint inside.Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Chris Franklin

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 1, 2025 42:07


    Aussie legend Chris Franklin joins the boys to chat about his number 1 hit, a jokes he can't get to work and everything Melbourne Comedy Festival Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Jonny Pelham

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 23, 2025 40:17


    Star of Live At The Apollo, Jonny Pelham, joins the boys to chat about 3 jokes he can't quite get to work. Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Rory O'Hanlon

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 10, 2025 34:39


    Rory joins the boys to chat about hostel showers, Danny's bucket & jokes that don't work, whilst they were all at the Melbourne Comedy Festival.Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - New Zealand Comedy Festival 2025

    Play Episode Listen Later May 28, 2025 55:04


    The boys go through their joke notes, Danny relives his youth and we hear what's been happening in New Zealand. Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    John Kearns

    Play Episode Listen Later May 12, 2025 54:03


    Star of Taskmaster and double Edinburgh Award winner, John Kearns joins the boys at Jokes Podcast HQ. They chat about behind the scenes gossip of his and Adam Riches acclaimed show, Ball & Boe, inside information about the Jokes Podcast studio & of course, jokes.Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - Melbourne Comedy Festival 2025

    Play Episode Listen Later May 8, 2025 34:02


    Mark &Danny chat about the Melbourne festival, they discuss "hack bits" and talk about the best ways to start a show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Rob Copland

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 24, 2025 40:40


    Victoria Wood Award winner, Rob Copland, joins the boys to chat about his award winning show, the only one-liner he's ever written and joke ideas we can't get to work yet.Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Danny's Adelaide Adventure

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 16, 2025 42:00


    Mark & Danny catch up after being apart for a whole month! Hear all about Danny's Australia adventures so far!Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Joz Norris

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 3, 2025 36:55


    Joz brings some fun imaginative ideas that he's tried and then dropped for whatever reason. Mark believes some of them your get another shot. What do you think?Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Andrew Bird Returns

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 26, 2025 48:07


    Andrew Bird joins us to talk through a couple of jokes he can't quite get to work and one that doesn't suit his comedic style. Enjoy!Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Michelle Shaughnessy Returns

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2025 35:53


    Michelle brings us 4 jokes that aren't quite working yet all for very different reasons. Enjoy!Follow Michelle on socials all @ michellesfunnyWatch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Darren Walsh Returns

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 13, 2025 31:26


    It's joke o'clock. Probably the most gags we've covered in an episode, such a fun one! Darren has just sold out the Leicester Square theatre but you can catch him this weekend in Glasgow here: https://glasgowcomedyfestival.seetickets.com/event/darren-walsh-do-you-like-puns-tour-warm-up-/drygate-peaks-bar/3186584 & his debut tour starts in January.Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Abigoliah Schamaun Returns

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 3, 2025 40:15


    Abilgoliah returns with a routine about private hospitals that she can't get to work consistently. Let's see if we can work out why...Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Comics' Comic Awards 2024 Winners Revealed

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2025 42:37


    We reveal the Best Act, Best MC, Best Independent Promoter & Outstanding Contribution to UK Comedy.Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch HereGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Joey Page Is Back

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 20, 2025 34:38


    Joey Page returns to dissect a whole routine about British Airways! Check out Joey's tour - HereWatch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free - Watch Here Get tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here - Tap To BookPrevious guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Ben Target

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 12, 2025 30:24


    Award winning comedian and director, Ben Target, joins us to chat about directing shows and of course, tells some jokes he tried but couldn't get to work. Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRn6iEuZvPUGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here: https://marksimmons.co.uk/live-dates/Previous guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Alexander Bennett

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 6, 2025 29:45


    Alexander Bennett brings 3 jokes he likes but can't get to work. Really fun episode!Watch Mark's Comedy Special on YouTube for free here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRn6iEuZvPUGet tickets to Mark's new tour (with Danny) here: https://marksimmons.co.uk/live-dates/Previous guests include Milton Jones, Sarah Millican, Rob Beckett, Penn & Teller, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Seann Walsh, Jeff Innocent & many more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Mark's Comedy Special

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 28, 2025 30:05


    This week we breakdown the process of independently making a comedy special and Danny quizzes me on certain key aspect of the show. Go watch the special on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/RRn6iEuZvPUMark's new tour, Jest To Impress, is on sale this Friday but you can access tickets early by joining his mailing list here: www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Milo Edwards

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 23, 2025 34:57


    Milo Edwards going us to chat through three jokes we likes but couldn't get to work. For Mark's new comedy special and brand new tour show join his mailing list here: www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - Mark's Birthday Podcast

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2025 46:43


    A roller coaster of an episode for Mark's birthday, some bad news regarding Edinburgh but all ends well with a lovely darts joke quiz. To see Mark's comedy special and book tickets for his new tour, join hs mailing list here: www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Paddy Young

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 9, 2025 33:21


    Paddy Young joins Mark & Danny to chat about his alcohol free beer routine and his material about where to look when sitting on the tube. Mark's new tour will be on sale soon, join his mailing list here so you don't miss out www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Seann Walsh Is Back From The Bed

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 31, 2024 54:11


    Seann returns to chat about his new YouTube stand-up special Back From The Bed! We talk about this choice of opener, wardrobe malfunctions and what not to do when a gig is going wrong. Mark Simmons new tour will be on sale very soon, sign up to his mailing list here so you don't miss it. www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk: Xmas Special 2024

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 24, 2024 68:01


    Jam packed Christmas podcast this week. Naughty advent calendars, 20 questions, secret Santa & Darren Walsh joins the boys for a Christmas cracker competition. Mark's tour goes on sale soon, join his mailing list at www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Penn & Teller

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 19, 2024 47:21


    Penn joins Mark & Danny to chat about the process of putting a show together, what they change when performing abroad, the importance of a good parking spot and so much more.Penn & Teller will be celebrating 50 years of performing together next year with shows at the London Palladium. Link to tix here: https://www.ticketmaster.co.uk/penn-teller-tickets/artist/806654Mark's new tour will be announced soon, head to his website to join his mailing list here: https://marksimmons.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - Don't look back in clanger

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2024 36:30


    Mark & Danny discuss a joke about freebies, Danny's massive cabbage and lots more...Wanna see Mark & Danny on tour, join the mailing list @ www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Rosalie Minnitt

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 5, 2024 33:58


    Rosalie Minnitt joins us this week to chat about character comedy, approaching Edinburgh in an unusual way and Mark embarrasses himself politically.Mark's new tour will be on sale soon, as well as his comedy special, make sure you join his mailing list for early access www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Davina Bentley

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 28, 2024 29:06


    Davina joins the boys this week to chat about her spin class bit. Enjoy! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - Danny Gets Hacked

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 22, 2024 43:51


    An eventful Tour Talk episode including comedians misbehaving, a Q&A and Danny gets hacked live on the podcast!See the boys at a future live show, join Mark's mailing list @ www.marksimmons.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Jeff Dunham

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 13, 2024 42:35


    American ventriloquist, Jeff Dunham, joins Mark to chat about putting a show together, the characters he created over the years that didn't quite work and his unusual method of trying out new material. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Hannah Campbell

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 6, 2024 31:38


    Recorded at the New Zealand comedy festival, Hanah Campbell chat to Mark about 4 routines she can't quite get to work Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - First Time Tour Support

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 30, 2024 39:31


    Live from The Forge Comedy Club in Brighton, Stuart Foreman chats to Mark & Danny just before doing his first tour support spot. They chat about how he's feeling, expectation and how it was directly after his set. He also tells us three jokes he's working on. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Ting Lim

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 23, 2024 29:42


    Ting Lim joins Mark to chat through 3 jokes she liked but couldn't get to work. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Adam Flood

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 15, 2024 31:33


    Mark chats to Adam Flood during the Melbourne Comedy Festival. We hear about an observational disaster & three jokes he can't get to work Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Dan Tiernan

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 8, 2024 31:48


    Dan Tiernan joins us with three of his jokes that he dropped from his show and we discuss why! Great chatting jokes with this award winning comedian. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - Joke Of The Fringe

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 1, 2024 53:45


    Funniest Joke Of The Fringe behind the scene's gossip & Danny's rodeo trip. It's a jam packed electric episode! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tour Talk - Danny's LA meetings

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 24, 2024 42:54


    New season premier episode, Danny is back from LA and fills us in on all things Jay Leno, Vegas, Joe Rogan and more. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    James Wallace

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 16, 2024 31:08


    One-liner comedian James Wallace joins Mark for a joke heavy episode where they deep dive into four of his gags that don't quite work... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Luke Benson

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 5, 2024 34:09


    Luke Benson joins Mark to discuss 3 routines that he can't quite get to work. That sprinkled with some basketball puns, what more could you want Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Olivia Lee

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 29, 2024 39:51


    Chaotic fun episode with Olivia Lee and I quote "I feel like I'm on acid". We work through three joke ideas that she can't quite get to work. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Jason John Whitehead

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 23, 2024 34:06


    Great episode where we deep dive into three bits Jason is working on. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    acast jason john whitehead
    Alex Kealy

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 9, 2024 29:51


    Just 6 days away from the Edinburgh Festival, Alex Kealy come into the jokes studio to chat about a couple of bits he can't get to work. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tom Elwes

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 2, 2024 31:39


    Tom Elwes brings us there jokes he can't get to work and we put our heads together to see if we can fix them. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    acast tom elwes
    Olaf Falafel

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 22, 2024 36:11


    This week Olaf Falafel talks us through some of the silliest jokes we've ever had on the podcast. Enjoy Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    acast olaf falafel
    Tour Talk - Custard Cream Heist

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 10, 2024 30:34


    There's a lot of tour chat to catch up on this week. Mark vents, Danny's had his feelings hurt and much much much more Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Claim Jokes with Mark Simmons

    In order to claim this podcast we'll send an email to with a verification link. Simply click the link and you will be able to edit tags, request a refresh, and other features to take control of your podcast page!

    Claim Cancel