Two-Man Wall

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Two brothers talkin' about the English game. About as enjoyable as standing in the wall of a blindfolded Granit Xhaka free kick.

Brayden Schwartz


    • May 6, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 59m AVG DURATION
    • 100 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Two-Man Wall

    MW33-35 - Champions at last

    Play Episode Listen Later May 6, 2025 50:04


    Liverpool are crowned champions as Ipswich's fate is sealed, the race for the Top 5 places rages on, and Ethan and Brayden try to make each other look silly with blind rankings.

    MW32 - United We Fall

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 16, 2025 55:31


    The season from hell (ironically enough for the Red Devils) continues for Man United as they drop to 15th in the table. Plus, Chelsea drop massive points in the Top 5(!) race as Newcastle and City prevail.

    MW30-31 - Survival of the fittest

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 10, 2025 68:10


    Ipswich threw away a lead to the team they couldn't do that against, and their fate is now all but sealed. Plus, Villa pick up big points in the race for European spots and ChatGPT decides who is the best midfielder ever.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2025 49:49


    Liverpool soar as Arsenal falter, meaning we may have our runaway champions already. Plus, Brayden and Ethan breakdown the current Top 4 (5?) race and relegation battle.

    MW24 - A slice of humble pie

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 5, 2025 47:18


    Arsenal enacts devious revenge on City, Forest drops a touchdown and extra point on Brighton, and Liverpool pass the Bournemouth (A) test

    MW22+23 - Mate...

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 31, 2025 59:26


    It can't get much worse for Ange's men, as they concede two quick goals to Leicester and drop all three points at home. Plus, Bournemouth are formidable and City find a resolute victory against Chelsea.

    MW20+21 - The Forest is Alive

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2025 53:29


    Nottingham Forest take would-be champions Liverpool all the way to the final whistle, earning their stripes yet again in a 1-1 draw. Plus, Arsenal take NLD #2, Amad saves United, and January transfers are finally picking up.

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2025 57:30


    19 down. 19 to go. Brayden and Ethan hand out mid-season awards and make bold predictions about what's to come before May.

    MW14-16 - Manchester Sh*tty

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 23, 2024 38:34


    City's unfathomable form continues as they slip out of the Top 4 for the first time in years. Plus, Chelsea look like title challengers and Liverpool lets everyone back in it.

    MW13 - Manchester City are... bad?

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 4, 2024 67:23


    That 6 loses in 7 games in all competitions for City, the last being at the hands of Arne Slot's runaway league favorites. Plus, Arsenal smoke West Ham, Chelsea smoke Villa, and Amorim tallys his first league win.

    The TMW Quiz Show‼️

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 22, 2024 44:31


    Ethan and Brayden take this international break lull to bring you some high-octane Premier League knowledge tests. Step right up and try your luck!

    MW9+10 - One question facing every team

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 7, 2024 83:34


    Ten hag's departure has us thinking about what other teams should be asking themselves as the first quarter of the season closes. Can Liverpool do it? Can Bournemouth scrape a European spot? Is Amorim the answer?

    MW8 - Liverpool's Shiny New Toy✨

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 24, 2024 69:47


    We're talking about Arne Slot's magnificent bald head of course, both inside and out, as Liverpool sit top of the league after 8 games. Plus, red cards bite Arsenal again, Southampton can't catch a break, and we break down our best Sitcom Character XIs!

    MW7 - Hot Seat Masterclass?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 9, 2024 67:28


    Erik ten Hag drops his two starting center backs with his job on the line and ends up pulling out a clean sheet at Villa. Plus, Spurs collapse at Brighton, Arsenal and City earn comeback wins, and Ethan takes another Fifa Song Quiz.

    MW5 - A Rivalry is Born

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 25, 2024 68:42


    City-Arsenal had it all this weekend, and Ethan and Brayden are here to break it all down for ya. Plus, Ethan quizzes Brayden on past EPL rivalries.

    Early-Season Club Grades✏️

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 18, 2024 70:15


    Brayden and Ethan give every Premier League club a letter grade through Matchweek 4

    MW2 - Madueke HATES Wolves

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 27, 2024 49:04


    First a public denouncing of Wolverhampton (the city), then a public execution of Wolverhampton (the team). Madueke really hates Wolves. Plus, Brighton beat United at the death, Raya saves Arsenal, and Haaland is Haaland.

    MW1 - We're so back (it's over)

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 22, 2024 63:14


    MW1 is in the books and there's nothing left to do but overreact to the opening weekend shenanigans. Brayden and Ethan provide one reasonable overreaction per match and rank the EPL's best strikers.

    epl mw1

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 16, 2024 92:20


    It's that time of year. Team by team, Ethan and Brayden break down exactly how the new season will unfold.

    EURO x COPA RECAP POD

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 18, 2024 65:32


    One month later and here we are; dazed, confused, and left wondering where all the time went (and how England managed to make the final). Brayden and Ethan breakdown everything you missed from the summer's festivities.

    JUNE INTERNATIONAL ROUND-UP

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2024 63:54


    Croatia get grouped, USMNT might get grouped, and England fans think England might as well have gotten grouped. It's a international free-for-all on this week's episode of the TMW Podcast.

    EURO PREVIEW

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2024 61:16


    England? France? Germany? Serbia???? Tune in for over-researched picks on the summer's most anticipated tournament

    TMW END-OF-SEASON EXTRAVAGANZA‼️

    Play Episode Listen Later May 31, 2024 75:08


    TMW wrap up the 2023/24 season with TOTY selections, award picks, and reactions to their pre-season table predictions. What a podcast!

    MW38 - SURPRISE❗City Win #️⃣6

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2024 27:06


    No drama for the neutrals on Sunday as City take care of business to win their 4th straight championship. Are we the farmers?

    MW33-35 - The Two Horse Race

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 30, 2024 52:30


    Klopp's Liverpool takes 2 brutal results and effectively falls out of the title race while Everton turns up the heat and secures safety. Plus Brayden ranks Europe's best derby's.

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 18, 2024 54:40


    It's that time of year, folks. Brayden and Ethan make final table predictions as the season comes to a close. Who goes down? Who gets European spots? Find out with one tap of your finger.

    MW29 - Snoozer at the Etihad

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 2, 2024 83:19


    City and Arsenal play to a dry goalless draw sending Liverpool to the top, United score and concede in the last 3 minutes of the game, and Ethan and Brayden break down the TV's best personalities bracket-style.

    MW28 - Stalemate at Anfield♟️

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 14, 2024 74:01


    A Liverpool and City draw and a late Arsenal winner shoots the Gunners into 1st. Plus, Spurs wallop Villa and the two worst teams in the league both blow 2 goal leads. Yikes.

    MW26+27 - The Duality of Man (United)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 6, 2024 68:34


    United go up early but end up rolling over in a 3-1 loss at the Etihad. Arsenal continue to torch the league, Núñez lifts Liverpool with the last touch, and the Villa/Spurs top 4 battle rolls on.

    MW24+25 - Who pissed off Arsenal?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 22, 2024 68:17


    The gunners win 11-0 in their combined games over the last 2 match weeks, Chelsea earn a point away at City, and United continue to roll into the Top 4 race.

    MW22+23 - Luton Town has arrived

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 6, 2024 71:51


    8 goals in 2 games for the Hatters sees them pop out of the relegation zone this week. Arsenal take down Liverpool to keep title hopes alive, United win back to back, and City cruise.

    MW21 - Tony! Toni! Toné! Toney?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 25, 2024 60:00


    Premier League regulars Ivan Toney and Kevin de Bruyne both make their returns this week, both getting on the scoresheet in 3-2 wins. Plus, United and Spurs share spoils and Brayden and Ethan drum up some ideal January signings for Big 6 clubs.

    The TMW Festive Fixture Super-Podcast

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 10, 2024 64:57


    Ethan and Brayden catch you up on everything you missed during the Premier League's hectic festive period, tier-list style. Plus, who was a better player: Di Maria or Robben?

    MW17 - City, Arsenal, Liverpool, Everton

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 20, 2023 60:06


    That's four (4) clean sheet wins in a row for the Toffees. You do not want to play them right now. Liverpool stifled by United at home, everyone else takes care of business. Plus, we honor the Club World Cup with a game of Club Guess Who.

    MW15+16 - Everton-Villa Title Race?

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 16, 2023 56:14


    Arsenal and City lose, Villa and Everton cruise, who says no? Villa gets both Arsenal and City at home, Everton win 3 straight, and Liverpool go top.

    MW14 - One normal week of Barclays, all I ask, will never happen

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 7, 2023 60:35


    The Premier League delivers another thrilling match week. City and Spurs play to a wild draw, Liverpool steal a 4-3 against Fulham, Newcastle and Chelsea handle United and Brighton, respectfully.

    MW13 - 1 step forward, 10 points back

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 29, 2023 65:15


    Everton get slapped with a 10 point deduction from the FA and Ethan is here to breakdown how and why. Arsenal go top after City and Liverpool share, Spurs lose their 3rd straight, and Newcastle humble Chelsea at St. James.

    MW12 - No defense, just vibes

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 18, 2023 55:29


    City and Chelsea were not concerned with conceding goals last weekend as they shared a 4-4 draw at Stamford Bridge. Wolves shock Spurs in the final minutes, Liverpool and Arsenal cruise, and we have a five (5) team title race.

    MW11 - VAR, with a side of football

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 10, 2023 61:54


    If you look closely, you might be lucky enough to see some actual football in the middle of all the VAR. Arsenal lose on a thrice-checked and thrice- cleared Anthony Gordon winner, 9-man Spurs lose 4-1 at the hands of Chelsea, and Luton get a historic result against Liverpool.

    MW10 - Erik ten Hot Seat?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2023 58:56


    Are the bald man's days numbered? A 3-0 thumping in the derby certainly won't help. Plus, Chelsea return to normal form, Spurs remain 2 points clear, and Ethan gives us his Meme D'or rankings on the year.

    MW9 - The Mudryk Strikes Back

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 26, 2023 55:10


    Who cares if it was a cross or a shot? Mikhailo certainly doesn't. Arsenal snatch back a point at the Bridge, Liverpool leave it late in the derby, and Spurs go 2 points clear at the top.

    MW8 - Party like it's 2015

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 11, 2023 66:29


    Yep, that was the last time Arsenal beat City in the league. Ethan was just a starry-eyed 10 year-old lad, unaware of the horrors the next 8 years would bring. Scott McTominay comes on and scores two goals in the last 8 minutes to beat Brentford (not a typo), Brighton and Liverpool share the spoils, and Newcastle and Villa are both held away from home.

    MW7 - "Oops

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 5, 2023 69:00


    I know we say this every week but this has got to be the worst refereeing mistake of all time. Liverpool lose 2-1 to the PGMOL away, Wolves steal all three against league-leaders City, Villa thwomp Brighton at home, and Erik 10th Hag gets beat again at Old Trafford.

    MW6 - Crazy Eights

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 27, 2023 67:23


    Newcastle drop a hot and steamy 8-bomb on Sheffield United's forehead at Bramall Lane, Arsenal and Spurs share the derby, Liverpool and City roll, and Chelsea can't buy a goal. Plus, we honor the release of EAFC 24 with our very own TMW Fifa Soundtrack Quiz

    MW5 - United/Chelsea Win a Game Challenge(impossible)

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 22, 2023 60:00


    Just 2 team that can't get out of their own way right now. Spurs win crazy against Sheffield, City comeback to beat West Ham, and Arsenal manufacture a win at Goodison.

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 15, 2023 54:59


    Is it ever too early to start overreacting? Brayden and Ethan break down how much you need to start panicking about a few teams that were slow out of the gate this season.

    MW3 - DARWIZZZYYYYYYY

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 1, 2023 55:23


    You thought he fell off. We thought he fell off. He needed that. Newcastle swipe the Choke of the Weekend title right from Arsenal's hands. United mount an impressive comeback, West Ham beat up Brighton away, and City almost blow it to Sheffield.

    MW2 - Thank God for Everton (H)

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2023 57:28


    If no one got me, I know Everton (H) got me, can I get an AMEN. Villa resuscitate their offense against a helpless Toffee side, City handle Newcastle, Chelsea get dropped by West Ham, Spurs blank United, and Brighton is playing better than your team right now. Plus, Ethan is the first ever contestant on The Caic(edo) is Right!

    MW1 - The masculine urge to blame VAR

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 18, 2023 57:48


    The Premier League is BACK

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2023 78:26


    IT'S THAT TIME OF YEAR BOYS AND GIRLS. Ethan and Brayden drop some revolutionary ball knowledge on your noggin as they layout exactly how this year's campaign will unfold.

    SotC: Tottenham Hotspur⚪

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 26, 2023 27:44


    He loves me, he loves me not...does he love me enough to sign another long-term contract after an 8th place finish? Resigning Harry Kane is a must, right? Or is it? Ethan and Brayden breakdown Spurs brutal season and what it may mean for the future of the club.

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