Lessons learned in fatherhood and jiu jitsu and where they sometimes overlap. This weekly conversation between Blake Kasemeier and Uday Malhotra unpacks the learning, struggles and triumphs of two dads who also happen to be high-level jiu jitsu practitioners. Topics covered range from raising toddlers with emotional intelligence to balancing jiu jitsu with real-world responsibilities to our weekly snack haul from Trader Joes.
Blake Kasemeier and Uday Malhotra
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Use Blake's link to get 20% off of Better Help: https://www.betterhelp.com/blakeoftoday/ Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ In this episode of Grappling with Fatherhood, we dive deep into the real meaning of self-defense — not just as a physical skill, but as a mindset we can pass on to our kids. We explore: How to teach our children the why behind self-defense — building confidence without aggression Strategies for navigating bullying — when to step in, when to listen, and how to empower kids to handle conflict What it means to model that restraint as a father and practitioner Personal stories from the mats and the playground that reflect the daily balancing act of being strong and safe Whether you're raising little white belts or just trying to raise kids who know their worth, this episode offers perspective, tools, and a few hard-earned lessons to carry with you — on and off the mats.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Check out Blake's Noticing Journal: https://stilclassics.com/products/stil-x-blake-of-today-the-noticing-journal?utm_source=social&utm_medium=blake&utm_campaign=stilxblake&utm_id=stilxblake&variant=41454031175778 Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Actions speak louder than words—both on the mats and at home. In this episode of Grappling with Fatherhood, Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier explore the power of setting an example in parenting and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. From demonstrating discipline and resilience to modeling respect and patience, they discuss how leading by example shapes future generations. Through personal stories and practical insights, they break down what it means to inspire growth in your kids, your training partners, and yourself. Tune in and lead the way.
Every black belt was once a white belt, and every experienced dad was once a first-time father. In this episode of Grappling with Fatherhood, hosts Blake Kasemeier and Uday Malhotra explore what it means to start from scratch—both on the jiu-jitsu mats and in the world of parenting. Blake and Uday share their personal stories of stepping into the unknown, from the nervous excitement of their first jiu-jitsu class to the overwhelming (and sometimes terrifying) reality of becoming a dad for the first time. They discuss the mix of emotions—fear, frustration, joy, and triumph—that come with learning something completely new and the patience required to grow in both arenas. Whether you're a new dad, a fresh white belt, or someone navigating the early stages of a new challenge, this episode is for you. Tune in for an honest and inspiring discussion that reminds you: no one starts as an expert, and every stumble is just part of the journey. Elite Fundamentals from Uday: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra?srsltid=AfmBOoodyRMR1F0eMjuihtS9-mXReX5-pdDwuQFFJ2UD7VLY9mJ-dquq Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://fluidtactical.com/
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Join Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier on this uplifting episode of "Grappling with Fatherhood" as they celebrate the joy found in both parenting and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Through heartfelt stories and reflections, they share how small victories—whether on the mats or in family life—bring lasting fulfillment. Uday and Blake discuss the unexpected moments of laughter, connection, and growth that make the challenges worthwhile. Tune in to rediscover the joy in both fatherhood and grappling, and be inspired to savor the journey, every step and roll along the way.
In this episode of Grappling with Fatherhood, hosts Blake Kasemeier and Uday Malhotra tackle one of the most universal struggles for parents and jiu-jitsu practitioners alike: the feeling of failure and the constant battle to feel "enough." Whether it's a tough day on the jiu-jitsu mats or moments of self-doubt in parenting, Blake and Uday share their own experiences of falling short, feeling overwhelmed, and learning to embrace imperfection. Join the conversation as the hosts dive into the emotional challenges of striving for excellence in both fatherhood and BJJ. They explore how external pressures, comparison, and self-criticism can lead to feelings of inadequacy. Whether you're a dad trying to juggle the demands of family life or a jiu-jitsu enthusiast grappling with performance plateaus, this episode provides a space to reflect, reset, and move forward with confidence. Tune in for a heartfelt discussion that reminds you that perfection isn't the goal—growth is. Subscribe to Grappling with Fatherhood for weekly episodes where parenting and jiu-jitsu intersect, offering wisdom, humor, and real talk for dads on and off the mat. Get Elite No Gi Fundamentals: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra?srsltid=AfmBOoqqK949BdyECkdS1fhW0C0ceeia-qNMNcKBooo6je-5ldBPG3DW
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ On this episode of "Grappling with Fatherhood," hosts Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier explore the often-overlooked value of taking breaks in both parenting and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (taking breaks in parenting?!). They discuss the importance of rest and recovery, not just for physical health, but for mental clarity and emotional well-being. Through personal stories and practical advice, Uday and Blake show how stepping back can lead to growth—whether it's taking a breather from the mats or finding moments of pause in the chaos of parenthood. Tune in for tips on striking the balance between action and rest.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Join hosts Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier on "Grappling with Fatherhood" as they unravel common myths in both parenting and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. In this episode, they debunk misconceptions and provide clarity on widely held beliefs. From parenting myths about discipline and having a social life to Jiu-Jitsu fallacies about training, excuses, and if size really does matter. Uday and Blake separate fact from fiction. Tune in for a candid discussion filled with personal stories and expert insights that will empower you to navigate both fatherhood and grappling with greater confidence and understanding.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Join hosts Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier for a special AMA episode of "Grappling with Fatherhood." This week, they tackle listener questions on three profound topics: who should be teaching, helping your kids cope with death, and the role of specialists in BJJ. Discover the qualities of effective instructors, strategies for discussing and managing grief, and the benefits and pitfalls of specialization in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. With personal stories and practical insights, Uday and Blake provide wisdom and connection, making this a must-listen episode for grapplers and parents alike.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ This week, Blake and Uday address a wide range of topics, from managing time effectively to dealing with anxiety, and fitting jiu-jitsu training into a busy parenting schedule. Listeners will gain valuable tips on: - Effective time management for busy parents - Techniques for managing anxiety and stress - Balancing jiu-jitsu training with family responsibilities - Finding motivation and maintaining consistency in both parenting and martial arts Whether you're struggling to find time for yourself, feeling overwhelmed by anxiety, or seeking ways to integrate your passion for jiu-jitsu into your parenting journey, this episode offers supportive and relatable advice. Blake and Uday provide a warm and engaging space for listeners to connect and feel understood.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Join hosts Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier on "Grappling with Fatherhood" as they delve into the complex world of screen time. Exploring both its value and potential dangers, Uday and Blake offer a balanced perspective on how screens influence our roles as parents and grapplers. Drawing from their personal experiences, they discuss the benefits of screen time, such as using instructional videos to enhance Jiu-Jitsu techniques and educational content for children. Simultaneously, they tackle the challenges, from the risks of overexposure to managing digital distractions. Tune in for an episode that offers insights into navigating the digital age with wisdom and intentionality.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra (Discount Code: SPRING2024) Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Join Uday and Blake as they share personal anecdotes and candid reflections on the challenges and triumphs of balancing the demands of family life with the rigors of training, competing, and work. From time management techniques to prioritization strategies, they provide listeners with actionable advice for maintaining harmony and fulfillment amidst life's myriad obligations. With heartfelt storytelling and expert guidance, they demonstrate that with mindful intentionality and a commitment to self-care, it is possible to thrive in both roles of fatherhood and grappling enthusiast.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra (Discount Code: SPRING2024) Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Join hosts Uday Malhotra & Blake Kasemeier on "Grappling with Fatherhood" as they delve into the profound journey of learning from mistakes. Through personal anecdotes & insightful reflections (including one from the last episode!), discover the transformative power of embracing failures in both parenting & grappling. Throughout the episode, listeners are invited to reflect on their own experiences, drawing parallels between the challenges faced in parenting and the lessons learned on the mats. From missed opportunities to moments of doubt, Uday and Blake demonstrate how every misstep can be reframed as an opportunity for growth and resilience.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra (Discount Code: SPRING2024) Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ On this episode of "Grappling with Fatherhood" Uday and Blake explore the transformative power of effective communication. Drawing from personal experiences in parenthood & grappling, they discuss actionable strategies for honing communication skills to enrich relationships on & off the mats. Join Uday and Blake as they share personal anecdotes and profound reflections, delving into the intricacies of communication within the context of parenting and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. From navigating difficult conversations with children to honing the art of verbal and non-verbal communication on the mats, they illuminate the pathways to building trust, understanding, and meaningful relationships.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra (Updated Discount Code: SPRING2024) Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Uday & Blake tackle the relentless pursuit of excellence in both parenthood and grappling on "Grappling with Fatherhood." In this episode, they explore the parallels between the dedication required to succeed as parents and as grapplers, offering listeners invaluable insights and practical strategies for navigating the demanding journey ahead. Join Uday & Blake as they share personal anecdotes, illuminating the transformative power of putting in the work, day in and day out. Whether it's late-night feedings or early morning training sessions, they highlight the importance of consistency, perseverance, and unwavering commitment to being better.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra (Updated Discount Code: SPRING2024) Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ Embark on a poignant exploration of managing anxiety in both parenthood & Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu with hosts Uday Malhotra & Blake Kasemeier on "Grappling with Fatherhood." Delve into the depths of their personal experiences as they navigate the waters of anxiety, offering insights & practical strategies for coping with this formidable challenge. Join Uday & Blake as they candidly discuss the parallels between the anxieties faced in parenting & on the mats, unraveling the intertwined complexities of fear, doubt, & uncertainty. Don't miss this episode of "Grappling with Fatherhood," where Uday & Blake offer hope for grapplers & parents alike, reminding us that with courage, compassion, & resilience, we can overcome even the most daunting challenges life throws our way.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ In this episode of "Grappling with Fatherhood," hosts Uday Malhotra & Blake Kasemeier delve into the art of managing bad behavior, both on and off the mats. Join Uday and Blake as they draw parallels between the discipline required to navigate tantrums and disobedience in parenting, and the composure needed to address unruly behavior during training sessions. Through candid discussions, they offer listeners an understanding of the underlying dynamics at play, emphasizing the importance of patience, empathy, & clear communication. Blake & Uday share personal experiences of encountering adversity, both as fathers and as practitioners of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. From managing frustration on the mats to setting boundaries at home.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ In this episode of Grappling with Fatherhood, hosts Uday Malhotra & Blake Kasemeier unpack the intersection of hitting milestones in both Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu & parenthood. Join Uday & Blake, 2 seasoned grapplers & devoted fathers, who share their insights and heartfelt experiences navigating the dynamic landscapes of fatherhood and BJJ. In this episode, they dive deep into the significance of achieving milestones, whether it's belt promotions or witnessing their child's first fart. Through poignant anecdotes, our hosts offer listeners a glimpse into the challenges and joys of balancing the demands of training and parenting. Whether it's overcoming setbacks on the mat or celebrating the small victories of fatherhood, Blake & Uday reflect on the potential for growth and fulfilment in both aspects of life.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics Tutorial: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Get Fluid Tactical Electrolyte Drink Mix: https://store.livefluid.com/ In this episode of Grappling with Fatherhood, join seasoned hosts Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier as they delve deep into the intricacies of balancing parenthood with the world of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Tackling the theme of adaptability head-on, our hosts draw from their personal experiences and insights, offering perspectives on how to navigate the complexities of being both a dedicated parent and an ardent practitioner of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Throughout the episode, listeners are treated to heartfelt anecdotes and candid discussions about the trials and tribulations faced by grappling fathers. Whether it's juggling training sessions with diaper changes or finding solace in the camaraderie of the BJJ community, Uday and Blake paint a vivid picture of the relentless pursuit of excellence in both realms.
Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics "Elite No Gi Fundamentals" here: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotr Join hosts Blake Kasemeier and Uday Malhotra in a raw and real conversation on the latest episode of "Grappling with Fatherhood." This week, the duo explores the challenging terrain of burnout, drawing parallels between the exhaustion experienced on the jiu-jitsu mats and the demanding world of parenting. In this candid episode, Blake and Uday share personal stories of pushing through mental and physical fatigue both as dedicated fathers and passionate practitioners of the gentle art. They delve into the signs of burnout, discussing how to recognize and address the warning signals before they take a toll on one's well-being. Discover practical strategies and coping mechanisms to prevent burnout in both parenting and jiu-jitsu.
Get ready for an insightful episode on "Grappling with Fatherhood," where the worlds of fatherhood and jiu-jitsu collide. Hosts Uday Malhotra and Blake Kasemeier engage in a candid conversation exploring the profound lessons learned when dealing with change on and off the mats. Join the duo as they share personal stories, unveiling the parallels between adapting to change in the gentle art of jiu-jitsu and navigating the unpredictable journey of parenthood. From unexpected techniques on the mats to the ever-evolving challenges of raising children, this episode dives deep into the strategies and mindset shifts necessary to thrive amidst change. Whether you're a parent grappling with the constant changes of family life or a jiu-jitsu practitioner adapting to the dynamics of the mats, this episode provides practical tips and relatable anecdotes. Subscribe now to "Grappling with Fatherhood" for a regular dose of wisdom, humor, and shared experiences on the journey of fatherhood, where d
Hey gang! We are in the processes of editing a backlog of episodes we have recorded, but in the meantime we wanted to publish this special announcement. Spoiler alert, this episode goes heavy on the jiu jitsu and light on the fatherhood, but it's for good reason, we promise! Thank you all for rocking with us last year - much more to come. Get Uday's BJJ Fanatics "Elite No Gi Fundamentals" here: https://bjjfanatics.com/products/elite-no-gi-fundamentals-by-uday-malhotra Questions, comments, concerns: grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com
In this episode we unpack how our expectations of being parents and jiu jitsu players compared to our actual experiences. We also talk about how these expectations can cause unwarranted stress and anxiety, and ultimately how we can focus a little more on our experiences than our imagination. Questions, comments, concerns? Reach out at grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com
In this episode we unpack the idea of the “white belt mentality” and how we can apply it to fatherhood. The feeling of eagerness and seeing everything as an opportunity to grow and get better. The absence of ego and presence of excitement - everything that we felt when we first started out on our journey. Questions, comments, or concerns? Please drop us a line at grapplingwithfatherhood@gmail.com
It's belt promotion season. What does that mean to you, and how can the concept of belt promotions in Jiu Jitsu apply to parenthood? In this episode we get into it, plus Blake turns 40 and Uday travels to Vegas to teach a seminar. We also answer some questions about how jiu jitsu practitioners navigate their own feelings and expectations around getting (or not getting) their next belt. Questions, comments, concerns? Reach out to us at grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com Hope you enjoy!
In this episode we dig into community - it takes a village to raise a child and you cannot do jiu jitsu without a partner. Topics covered include: struggling with the mental and emotional challenges with job hunting, the importance of community as we get older and how to cultivate it, and a little bit of Masters World Championships. As always thank you for listening. Questions, comments, concerns? Drop us a line: grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com Protect your neck!
In this episode we Uday and Blake get into competition mindset. What it means to be a competitor vs a participant - in jiu jitsu, fatherhood and life. Blake talks about training on vacation and Uday explains what it takes to get a team ready to take on a tournament. If you have any questions feel free to reach out: grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com
This is a long one, we're sorry and you're welcome. This week we get into some of the challenges going on in our personal lives as well as some challenges in raising kids and pushing ourselves on the mats. We also cover (at length) how we both found Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and how it came to be such an important part of our lives. If you have any questions feel free to reach out: grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com
This week Uday and Blake talk about balancing (and sometimes failing at balancing) the many roles we inhabit: dads, husbands, providers, competitors and coaches. If you have any questions you'd like us to address please reach out to grapplingwithfatherpod@gmail.com Show Notes: TWIF (2:00): Uday talks Disneyland and traveling with the kids, Blake talks about the cognitive leaps in his toddler after 6 months. QOTW (21:23): How do you deal with the feeling of not being ready? TWIT (33:35): Uday talks about managing burnout, Blake talks about ramping up for a comp
This week in grappling and in fatherhood is all about checking our egos. From getting tapped by lower belts to realizing we don't have this gentle parenting thing totally figured out, this week was full of lessons in humility. If you have questions you'd like us to address please reach out to: grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com
Welcome to the Grappling with Fatherhood podcast. This is our first episode so thanks in advance for rolling with us (see what I did there?) as we work out the kinks. If you have questions you'd like us to address please reach out to: grapplingwithfatherhoodpod@gmail.com In this episode we cover: 3:10 - This week in fatherhood Uday got an unexpected call from a teacher at school and had to handle some tricky topics with his kid. Blake talks about struggling with managing screen time and how to be less reactionary. 15:45 - This week in training: Uday talks about the terrible feeling of accidentally injuring your training partner and we both talk about how to scale your strength and intensity for different training partners. 39:00 Snacks and pop culture 54:00 Lessons from the week - being less reactive and more thoughtful.