The State of Men

Mike & Aydian discuss in this podcast our dreams and how we have been limiting ourselves in our life.  We evaluate how impactful we are being with this project, The State of Men. We are explaining why this project or podcast isn't the right project for us at the moment.  We both want to be doing something that is empowering for both of us and we explain what this means for us.Thank you so much for being with us along the journey.  We are very grateful for your time and for helping make this community something special.    What to do when you and your partner are in a heated discussion?  Why is it so hard for men to dream?  How to dream bigger instead of being stuck in the ‘how' of our dreams?  How Aydian is creating something that is bigger than him to have a greater impact on the trans community? Mike explains how he hasn't been all in with himself for his business projects How we both had the same feeling around the Christmas break but didn't talk about it.

Jason Rosario is Chief Diversity, Equity & Inclusion Officer at BBDO Worldwide. Today, Aydian and Mike talk with Jason about the power of Vulnerability, what it means to have outlets for our emotions, and why sometimes you need to step away in order to truly step up. Listen to hear more of Jason's personal journey of how he got to be the man he is today, and why he knew he needed to give men a guiding light on their journey to healthier masculinity.Top Take-Aways:  Have you ever tried journaling as an outlet for your emotions?  Social Media wreaks havoc on our in-person relationships. Sometimes you have to step away to focus on doing the work. If vulnerability is our superpower, why are men so hesitant to share what it's really like for them?

SummaryIn today's episode, Mike & Aydian interview Larry D Moore about crypto and its future. He explains how he transitioned into full-time trading after entering the crypto rabbit hole. He also dives into the complete shift that is happening inside of our financial systems. We also covered the importance of having access to things. - We define what crypto &  blockchain is and how we will use this technology in the future.- What decentralized currency means and how the technology works- How the bitcoin network and how that - Why this technology is going to be the gamechanger for the smaller countries around the world- Is bitcoin more valuable because of the scarcity of availability? - Why bitcoins market cap will exceed Apple & Gold, and how that will happen- Why the financial system isn't working for everyone

Today, Aydian and Mike talk with Mike's Mom, Michelle Watts. In this episode, we get some more details on how Mike grew up. Michelle raised her three kids, while her husband traveled for work, and after moving many times ended up long-term in Indiana. We get some insights on what it was like as a Mid-West Mom, raising a firecracker like Mike, and how much things have changed with raising kids since she was a full-time Mother. Top Take-Aways:  Do you ever talk to your Mom about what it was like for her, raising you? Maybe you're missing out on some critical information by hearing her experience. Have times really changed? Can you recall what it's like when you were growing up compared to how kids grow up now? Do you think it's better or worse? Did your parents shelter you? Was that impactful in how you expressed yourself or tried to find answers to things you didn't know about? Was there ever a time you wished someone had asked you if you needed help?  Do you think parents are more protective of their daughters vs their sons?

Summary: Today, Aydian and Mike talk with a scientist, educator, lawyer, and founder of “Be More with Anu” - Anu Gupta. Anu and the men discuss growing as men in a society that is starved for compassion.  Anu discusses his work with different races and cultures - helping individuals break implicit biases and navigate from a place of compassion and love.   Top Take-Aways:  Do you often find yourself struggling to build meaningful, healthy friendships with other men? Does being a man make you innately better than the opposite gender? Do you see toxic masculine traits within yourself? Are we always looking for external validation when it comes to our healing - instead of defining our own healing in our own time? Are men getting better as we move forward in society? Are we learning to navigate from a place of compassion?

Summary: Today, Aydian and Mike talk about their own journeys with money, while they break down the “breadwinner” mentality.  Aydian unpacks how his early interactions with money ultimately shaped his perception of monetary success as an adult.  While Mike brings his experience of overcoming self-inflicted financing obstacles and understanding his new role as a financial contributor to his family. Top Take-Aways:  Is it the amount of money in our bank accounts that really makes us feel secure or is it the feeling of having money that provides security? How did watching our parents handle money during our childhood influence how we handle money now as adults? Where did we learn this concept that the male figure in the home is the one who should be responsible for making all the money? Is money a place of peace in your life or does money cause a great deal of anxiety and stress? Do you have illusions when it comes to money?

Summary: Today, Aydian and Mike discuss the fears that often follow men having daughters.  As parents themselves, Mike and Aydian offer a unique perspective on this topic and discuss every aspect from societal expectations to the transference of masculine toxicity to ultimately changing the narrative.  Top Take-Aways:  Why are men more afraid of having daughters than sons? Are we groomed to prefer one gender over the other? Why do we societally romanticize the father and son bond and relationship to such a high degree?  Why do men fear raising a daughter in a world where other men exist? Why do we stereotype the role of a father with their daughter?

Summary: Today, Aydian and Mike interview Dr. Juliana Hauser, the doctor who jumps in those hard conversations as she helps people rethink and reimagine sex, sexuality, and relationships. Dr. Juliana tackles the hard questions about finding and honing your agency.  Dr. Juliana, Mike, and Aydian discuss bringing men to the table regarding sex, sexuality, and body positivity in a safe environment.         Top Take-Aways:  What is the difference between empowerment and agency? Is it possible to have agency in some aspects of your life, but not in others? How do men fit in the world of sex and sexuality? How do men navigate the shame and guilt that is often associated with the feeling or perception of incompetence?

Today, Aydian and Mike are going to reflect on how the past few years have shaped their decisions and dreams going into the new year. From taking yourself too seriously to transforming your goals to a focus on having some serious fun - we are going to touch on it all. So strap in - Mike and Aydian are ready to set the stage to conquer those dreams, intentions, and visions for 2022. Top Take-Aways: - What are the big dreams outside of the day-to-day operation of your life? Where is your “margin for magic”? By the end of 2022 - what would you LOVE to have gotten done? - Will this 2022 be the year you thrive, maintain, and improve your life and overall well-being? - What dreams have you been chasing that you are ready to move on from? - What are your top 3-5 dreams, visions, and/or intentions for 2022? What dreams are you wanting to tell the universe you are ready to create?

Summary: Today Mike and Aydian talk about the elusive work/life balance. The discussion continues on the State of Men as we discover if the true work/life balance exists. Our hosts unpack the pressures placed on having a true work-life balance when your work is anything but conventional.      Top Take-Aways:  Have you ever felt like there are enough hours in the day? Where do you find time for yourself? Where do the idea and constant push to have an even work-life balance come from? What determines the value of your time? How do you measure if your work and life are balanced to suit your needs?

Bite Your Tongue or Say Your Peace? Today, Mike and Aydian delve into the always entertaining world of interacting with your family during the holidays. From dated humor to political view, the holidays can be a minefield of emotions and opinions. When do you say something? When is it appropriate and when is it not? Mike and Aydian answer these questions and more, along with providing helpful tips for navigating difficult topics without compromising your boundaries. Top Take-Aways: - What do you do in those touchy and difficult situations? - Are we different around our families versus in our real, everyday, lives? Do we compromise our boundaries to create comfort for other people? - How do we have these hard conversations? When are we calling people out versus calling people in?

In today's episode, Mike & Aydian, discuss their journey when it comes to their body images. Mike shares his experience over the past few years of gaining and losing weight.  He also explains more about going through his skin journey and how that has affected his view of his body. Aydian shares his journey with his eating disorder and how he was under eating to achieve the perfection of his ideal body perfection. He looks back on his life when he had the perfect six-pack in his life. They examine how eating disorders with men have been increasing over the years.  The media interpretation over the men's body has changed to all of the TV dads are all ripped now on the TV and in movies. We as men are being given a false sense of reality when it comes to expectations on how we are supposed to carry our bodies throughout the world. They also discuss why Mike's clothes are shrinking and he has to buy new ones.  Now that is hilarious. 

Today we are talking about how Aydian and Mike deal with their anger.  As men, we are never taught how to appropriately deal with our anger.  Anger is an emotion and there is nothing wrong with expressing anger. It becomes an issue when we start to take the anger out on other people or things around it.  Being unable to express our anger in a healthy manner is hurting ourselves and those around us. Mike and Aydian share stories about how they have misused their anger. Also, they share stories of how they have used anger to their advantage. We discuss how anger isn't a bad emotion and as men, we can learn how to express this angry in a healthy way.  Aydian shares his story about how he broke a glass container and the lessons he learned from it. We discuss the difference between rational and physical response when angry Aydian shares a difficult business situation and the journey with anger Mike shares a process to vent and get the anger out of your body The importance of giving ourselves space Mike shares how his kids are dealing with their anger since we have moved to Miami Enjoy the showAydian & Mike

During this episode, Aydian and Mike talk about doing end-of-the-year planning and preparing for the next coming year of 2022. In this episode, we covered the importance of planning your year and how to go about preparing for the upcoming year. It is important to map out the year so everyone on the team and the family have a plan for the upcoming year. It is valuable to call in what you would like to create for the following year.  This episode is the exact reason we are putting this episode together.  Go here for the full outline of the end-of-year planning: HTTP://thestateofmen.com/podcast.

Mike and Aydian talk about what they are grateful for this year. Gratitude comes in little and big ways for each of us. Keeping an awareness of the things we are happy about in our lives is a great way to remind us that most times, it ain't that bad.  What are you grateful for?Top Take-Aways: Thanksgiving Day traditions Aydian and Mike list 5 things they are grateful for this year New business ventures Mikes hairy back

Mike Watts gives a short Update on happenings with The State of Men and the plans for 2022. Thank you so much for being on this ride and we look forward to more amazing episodes with you. Cheers

Take the Challenge: Click hereSummary: Aydian and Mike explain the difference between a good guy or an unintentional asshole.  One of the sayings men carry around is the fact they don't think they are like the men that are causing harm to people in their lives because they are good guys.  Everyone else is the asshole. Top Take-Aways:  The details for the 5 Day Challenge that is listed on TheStateofMen.com Having a new awareness is the key to creating change in our life Why doing this challenge will help in your family environment Connect The State of Men IGAydianIGAydian's SiteMikeIGMike's Site

Summary: Aydian and Mike delve into the conversation and controversy around the Urban Meyer video circulating on news and social media. Everyone seems to have an opinion and the guys parse out what the video of the Jacksonville Jaguars coach includes, its impact and repercussions, and what it says about masculinity and relationships today.Top Take-Aways:  Why does our society treat men and women's infidelity in monogamous relationships differently? How do personal actions dictate business decisions? How do men hold other men accountable?

In today's episode of the podcast, Mike Watts & Aydian Dowling dig into the weird things men do to prove their manliness. Do you find yourself denying how cold it is and telling everyone you're fine when you are freezing? What is it about acknowledging that you are cold equates to weakness or non-manliness? Why on earth are bandaids emasculating? The guys go into the common and uncommon ways we prove our masculinity to ourselves and others.In this episode, we discuss the following:  The idea that perception of cold is influenced by gender What vocal tone do you use when cheering for sports? Do you go lower than your speaking voice? How does the pitch of a man's voice influence how others perceive him? Why do men think their cheering/watching a game influences the result? Where does the stereotype that men won't ask for directions come from? Why do men think they can fix things they have no experience with?

In today's episode of the podcast, Mike Watts & Aydian Dowling discuss struggle and masculinity. Listen in as the guys unpack the idea that men need to always push through when struggling. What supports do you use when you are struggling and do you allow yourself to lean on them? What is your inner monologue when things get difficult?In this episode, we discuss the following:- How does pushing your own needs down impact your health?- How does past trauma impact how we view our struggles?- How do our ideas of hustle and struggle compete?- What can you do to check in with yourself?- Who shaped your definition of success?

In today's episode of the podcast, Mike Watts & Aydian Dowling dive into an article they read called Why do Men Die Earlier?  Men on average are living on average 5.5 years less than women.  We discuss why it is important to find a doctor that feels they are working for you instead of you working for them.  They also explain how we are letting go of all of the ‘manly' activities in our life which allow us to show up in the world caring for the people in our lifeIn this episode, we discuss the following:  How do we fidget when we are recording the podcast? Do we think about our death?  How we are planning for our own death What is the difference between biological and culture when it comes to death? Why do we have to create everything to make men feel good?  Why putting your nuts in the sun is the new rage The importance of listening to your body

Mike and Aydian unpack modern fatherhood, digging into their own experiences as fathers, the impact of how they were parented by their fathers, and how fatherhood has shifted in America over the last three generations. What impact do media portrayals of fatherhood have on learning to be a father? How do men learn to become fathers?Top Take-Aways:  How do the different roles men play in society impact each other?  Does the experience of having divorced or non-cohabiting parents shape your perception of fatherhood? How do we hold other men accountable as fathers? What is valuable to you in fatherhood--time, money? How do our perceived cultural link between masculinity and virility impact how we show up as fathers?

Mike and Aydian discuss why men only comprise one-third of all people who go to therapy. Is it that men don't want help? Many men equate getting help with weakness and do not seek out mental health professionals. Has society imposed expectations on men that don't encourage men to get help?Top Take-Aways:  Many men equate getting help with weakness and do not seek out mental health professionals. Men tend to rely on their romantic partners for emotional needs while women have separate friend relationships they also discuss stress and mental health in addition to their romantic partners. Therapy began as an intervention for women tied to ill-conceived notions of being hysterical and it has taken a long time for therapy to catch up with treating the male population.

Mike and Aydian dive into what it means to have fun as a grown man. Do you have rituals around preparing to have a good time? At what point do you remember societal pressure imposing on what was considered “age-appropriate fun”? Do we conflate productivity with joy? How do you define fun for yourself?Top Take-Aways: Do you need mind-altering substances to put you in a place to have fun? At what point in our lives do the expectations around having fun change? Does money allow you to experience more fun in your life?

SummaryMike Watts and Aydian Dowling discuss the cultural myth that men are bad at relationships. Are men really only capable of transactional relationships with other men? Can men invest emotionally in platonic relationships? Why is the dominant paradigm that men want to “fix” others rather than be vulnerable and authentic?Top Take-Aways Moving toward a transformational relationship requires sitting with another man's pain, asking more questions, and being continued support. Ask others if they want advice or if they just want you to listen. Why don't men, in general, offer emotional support to other men in the same way they tend to offer it to women? Calls-to-action The State of Men Website Follow us on Instagram: @thestateofmen Aydian Dowling's Website Mike Watts' Website

Mike and Aydian dissect the movie, Luca. They dive into the friendship between boys, masculinity in friendship, and queer subtext in the film. Why is it that we don't see more fictional depictions of caring and platonic friendship between boys? What is it about the depiction (or lack thereof) of queerness in a mainstream film that causes the queer community to overlay gay subtext when it is not explicitly stated? Listen in and then let us know what you think.Top Take-Aways: Why is seeing a platonic and caring friendship among boys feel revolutionary? How does our own identity impact the lens through which we view media? Does the prevailing interpretation of popular film support or push back against your own identity? Why do we expect men to endure pain differently? To walk it off?

Have you found yourself wondering what parenting means to the modern man in America? How do men show up as fathers in 2021 and do what is best for their kids, partners, and selves?This week Aydian Dowling and Mike Watts discuss the top lessons they have learned as fathers committed not to perfection but showing up as their best selves.Top Take-Aways: How do we manage the illusion of control as a parent? Why is it important to have the ability to grow in the role of father? How does connecting with your partner shape your role as a father? Why does self-care make you a better dad? How does relating to and understanding gender impact your relationship with your child(ren)?

Mike Watts and Aydian Dowling discuss what it took to get this podcast from idea to reality including: - How they handled unexpected life events impacting the launch. - What books and resources helped them reframe their life views. - How to opt into what feels right in the face of uncertainty Listen in as they talk about how the best-laid plans can take longer than you think. Top Take-Aways: How does facing your fear change your life? How do we manage expectations and prevent ourselves from giving into negative thought patterns?

Mike Watts and Aydian Dowling discuss the language and terminology listeners will commonly encounter in the podcast including those concerning gender, sexuality, and pronouns. They dig into the evolution of words, how some terms are permissible depending on who is using them, and if there are words that should not be used at all. Join the guys to unpack language and its impact on our understanding of each other. Top Take-Aways: - What words should I be using? - What do these terms around LGBTIA+ conversations mean? - What is the difference between sexuality and gender identity? - What is the thing with pronouns? - What does nonbinary mean?

Mike and Aydian in conversation with Team USA Athlete Chris Mosier discussing: - Athlete Sponsorships - Being an out transgender athlete - Masculinity in mens' spaces - How children perceive and learn from adults' masculinity

Who are these guys anyway? Mike Watts and Aydian Dowling introduce themselves and discuss what brought them to this podcast, their unique life experiences, and perspectives that inform their vantage points on manhood in modern America.

In their first episode, “Who We Are and Why We are Here,” Aydian Dowling and Mike Watts lay the foundation for their groundbreaking podcast: The State of Men. We get the inside scoop of how they met, their hopes for the modern man, and how they plan on helping us there. They waste no time opening up about themselves while setting the stage for an all-inclusive environment to discuss every aspect of masculinity. From football to accountability, from mountain biking to broken kneecaps, from fatherhood to vulnerable conversations, we hear how Aydian and Mike plan to help “level up” men in today's society.

This podcast is hosting by Mike Watts & Aydian Dowling.Below are the details of the show and the hosts:Website: The State of MenPodcast: The State of Men, follow on your favorite listening platformIG: The State of MenAydian DowlingWebsite: Visit hereIG: Follow hereMike WattsWebsite: Visit hereIG: Follow here

Below are the details of the show: Website: The State of MenPodcast: The State of Men, follow on your favorite listening platformIG: The State of MenAydian DowlingWebsite: Visit hereIG: Follow hereMike WattsWebsite: Visit hereIG: Follow here