Fifty Shades of Gender

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We get curious about all things gender, sex and sexuality, as well as feminism (the inclusive kind), mental health and kink, and all that makes us humans unique and diverse. From body positivity to body dysmorphia, it’s all welcome here. Come with us on a journey of inclusion, acceptance and respect.

Esther Lemmens


    • Mar 6, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 50m AVG DURATION
    • 109 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Fifty Shades of Gender

    109. FINN EVANS: trans-masculine, trans man, queer

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 6, 2025 49:35


    Finn Evans is an artist, writer, film director, and owner of the production company Chudatsi.  Finn's pronouns are he/him, and he is trans-masculine and queer. He also uses the label trans man. Find out what that means to Finn in this episode.We also talk about challenges with gendered language, finding your people, what labels feel like home, intersectionality and discrimination, the importance of accurate media representation and celebrating genuine efforts at it, tackling misinformation, and letting people evolve. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/finn 

    108. ‘IRREGULAR JENN' WILSON: gender non-conforming, genderqueer, non-binary, neuroqueer

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 28, 2024 65:04


    ‘Irregular Jenn' Wilson is a writer, coach, and educator, founder of the company Irregular and of the International Day of Consent, which takes place annually on November 30th, and organiser of the upcoming I Do Consent summit, which runs from November 30th until December 2nd. Jenn's pronouns are they/them (she/her is ok) and the labels they use are gender non-conforming, genderqueer, non-binary, and neuroqueer. They also refer to themself as female and woman-shaped, as well as neurodivergent, polyamorous, a relationship anarchist, bisexual, and pansexual. Find out what that means to Jenn in this episode. We also talk about creating inclusive spaces, neuroqueering everything, unmasking, consent as a practice, misunderstandings around polyamory and relationship anarchy, liberating ourselves, and being a little bit braver. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/jenn-wilson  Find out more about the I Do Consent summit here:: https://bemore.irregular.org.uk/idocsummit24s 

    107. HELENA KEY: transgender woman, pansexual, bipolar

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 7, 2024 53:59


    Helena Key is a queer author and founder of an independent publishing company. Helena's pronouns are she/her, and she is a transgender woman, pansexual, and bipolar. Find out what that means to Helena in this episode. We also talk about transitioning while parenting a young child, building trust in relationships, the overlap between bipolar disorder and ADHD, challenges in calling out problematic behaviour and opinions in groups, alternative publishing company structures, writing authentic characters, and how to get a more realistic representation of LGBTQIA+ and other marginalised people in books, films, and TV. More on  www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/helena 

    106. ANSHAR SERAPHIM: non-binary dominant [autistic]

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 4, 2024 59:18


    Anshar Seraphim is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and neurodiversity advocate. Anshar likes they/them pronouns, but because they present as male, they don't really mind he/him. They identify as non-binary, because of their lack of exposure to gender constructs as an autistic person. Find out what that means to Anshar in this episode. We also talk about expectations of maleness, sensory difficulties, navigating relationships, social exclusion and isolation, making connections, masking, opening up conversations, effective listening, and learning how to treat each other well. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/anshar 

    105. SOFIE HAGEN: non-binary, queer

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2024 57:07


    Sofie Hagen is a multi-award-winning London-based Danish comedian, author, podcaster, and content creator. Her new book, Will I Ever Have Sex Again? Is out today, May 23rd, 2024. Sofie's pronouns are she/her and they/them, and they are non-binary and queer. Find out what that means to Sofie in this episode. We also talk about being raised as a person, how boundaries can be a gift, that safe sex is as much about being present as it is about using protection, that all bodies are new bodies when it comes to having sex, how fatness often complicates everything to do with gender, building self-trust, and becoming a safe person for yourself.  More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/sofie 

    104. JASON LEE: intersex, transgender (trans man), heterosexual, neurodiverse

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2024 62:11


    Jason Lee is an LGBTQI+ Youth Worker, previous presenter on The T-Boys Show on Pride Radio, and the first legally married transgender person in the UK. Jason's pronouns are he/him, and he is intersex and transgender (a trans man), as well as heterosexual and neurodiverse. Find out what that means to Jason in this episode. We also talk about disconnecting from the body and reclaiming yourself, the role of genetics in hormone therapy, and Gender Recognition Act reform. CW: suicide, bulllying, electric shock therapy, sexual assault, abuse, and trauma. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/jason

    103. RAY BRIGGS: genderqueer, boi, practicing bisexual, T4T

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 29, 2024 51:29


    Ray Briggs is professor of philosophy at Stanford University, co-host of the radio show Philosophy Talk, and co-author of the book What Even Is Gender? Ray's pronouns are they/them (he/him is also ok) and they are genderqueer, boi, and also a practicing bisexual, and T4T. Find out what that means to Ray in this episode. We also talk about ways to be queer, the expansiveness of the term bisexual, philosophy and decision making, ignoring possibilities, the essence of womanhood (or lack thereof), testosterone's physical and emotional effects, how to define aggression, consent policies, and being impossible. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/ray-briggs 

    102. CARRIE MARSHALL: trans woman, lesbian, demisexual

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2023 60:16


    Carrie Marshall is a writer, musician, and author of her memoir, Carrie Kills A Man. Carrie's pronouns are she/her, and she is a trans woman. She's also a lesbian, and demisexual. Find out what that means to Carrie in this episode. We also talk about transness only making sense in the rearview mirror, how much more challenging things can become once you start transition, what the anti-trans movement has in common with the witch trials, being ambushed in the media, why everything is gendered, hope for the future, and walking unafraid. CW: mention of suicide. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/carrie 

    101. MATTIA MAURÉE: nonbinary trans, agender, genderqueer, transmasc, autigender, audhd, relationship anarchy, poly, queer [neuroqueer]

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2023 56:50


    Mattia Maurée is a composer, writer, AuDHD coach, and founder and host of the podcasts The Longer Road and AuDHD Flourishing. Mattia's pronouns are they/them, and they are nonbinary trans, agender, genderqueer, transmasc, autigender, AuDHD, and queer (as well as neuroqueer). They also use the labels relationship anarchy and poly. Find out what that means to Mattia in this episode.We also talk about being taken seriously when you're outside the gender binary, what counts as an apology and what doesn't, assumptions about presentation, the importance of diverse transition stories, performing gender, how advice for different neurotypes can be conflicting, and navigating intersectional marginalised identities. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/mattia 

    100. Reflections (part 4): discoveries so far

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 26, 2023 73:53


    In this fourth Reflections episode, Katy interviews Esther as she reflects on further conversations she's had with gender-diverse folks, what she's learned about gender, as well as her own journey and how she and the podcast have evolved over three years since the podcast started. We also talk about the decision to take a break, trusting your intuition, intersectionality, internalised misogyny, using inclusive language, questioning everything, opening conversations rather than shutting them down, what allyship can look like, and reclaiming authenticity. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/reflections-4 Registration for our allyship course is now open! Find out more on https://fiftyshadesofgender.com/allyship-course/ and join Esther on this journey of exploration, reflection, and awareness.   

    99. TASH CORBIN: neurodivergent, non-binary, genderfluid woman, queer

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 28, 2023 45:39


    Tash Corbin is an online business owner who helps women and non-binary folk to start and scale their businesses. Tash's pronouns are she/they, and they are neurodivergent, non-binary, a genderfluid woman, and queer. Find out what that means to Tash in this episode. We also talk about what is non-conforming enough, the experience of being sexualised, how showing up with our imperfections builds connection, marginalisation and intersectionality, how we all have internalised misogyny, racism, homophobia and transphobia, seeing each other's humanity, and feeling safe to be yourself. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/tash 

    98. ELY PERCY: queer, agender, neurodivergent (brain injury)

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2023 44:44


    Ely Percy is a writer, author of the novel Duck Feet (and more), and brain injury survivor. Ely's pronouns are they/them, and they are a queer, agender, neurodivergent person. Find out what that means to Ely in this episode. We also talk about being neurodivergent from a brain injury perspective, being 'not straight' during Section 28, acting normal, coming out again, not recognising yourself in the gender binary, and how gender diversity is expanding in film and TV. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/ely 

    97. KATE BROOKES: parent of a transgender child

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2023 48:41


    Kate Brookes is an author, TV reporter, anchor-turned-producer, and filmmaker. Kate is a cisgender woman and uses she/her pronouns. She's also the parent of a transgender child. Find out what that means to Kate in this episode. We also talk about the challenges of deciding on a name, being in transition as a family, the privilege of having access to an accepting community, how important it is to be an ally and educate ourselves, that acceptance is protection, and telling stories in a responsible way. CW: Please be aware that there is mention of suicide in this episode. Also, in this conversation, Kate uses her daughter's old pronouns and name (which is a pseudonym) to communicate how she identified at a given time. This is in line with how their story is told in Kate's new book, Transister: raising twins in a gender-bending world, which was just released, on August 8th. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/kate 

    96. CHRIS TALBOT-HEINDL: transgender, non-binary, asexual, panromantic

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2023 49:14


    Chris Talbot-Heindl is an artist and educomics creator. Chris's pronouns are they/them, and they are transgender, non-binary, asexual and panromantic. Find out what that means to Chris in this episode. We also talk about how labels can mean something different each day, that the gender binary is a colonial construct, gender fuckery and gender abundance, cultural influences on gender, what allyship is and what it's not, how to take accountability, feeling safe in ourselves, dismantling internalised belief systems, and making space for abundance. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/chris-th 

    95. JORIS GREY: trans, trans man, queer

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 22, 2023 46:14


    Joris Grey is a business coach for activists. Joris's pronouns are he/him, and he is a trans man, and queer. Find out what that means to Joris in this episode. We also talk about being comfortable in your body, getting the method of application right when going on hormones, the importance of representation, the need to focus more on the thriving of trans people rather than the struggle, the difference between sustainable and regenerative, and allowing ourselves to create a big vision for ourselves and the world. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/joris 

    94. RACHEL DOVER: transgender female

    Play Episode Listen Later May 25, 2023 80:41


    Rachel's pronouns are she/her, and she is a transgender female. Find out what that means to Rachel in this episode. We also talk about being transgender vs having gender dysphoria, how coming out is a process, transitioning during covid, the actual and hidden cost of transition, how hard it is to get a GRC (Gender Recognition Certificate), how the term 'TERF' has evolved, and feeling like yourself. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/rachel-dover 

    93. FABIAN WEBB BROWN: trans(gender) man

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2023 47:10


    Fabian is a clinic nurse specialist in the NHS, and appreciator of TV, films, books, music, theatre and art. Fabian's pronouns are he/him, and he is a transgender man. Find out what that means to Fabian in this episode. We also talk about transitioning in your teenage years, what it's like to be pregnant as a trans man, accessing reproductive care while navigating an outdated system that doesn't distinguish between sex and gender, and becoming comfortable in your gender identity. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/fabian 

    92. FINLEY ARESET BRAND: transgender, non-binary, agender, demigirl [autigender]

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 30, 2023 55:59


    Finley's pronouns are they/them, and they are transgender, non-binary, agender, and a demigirl. Autigender is another label they are considering adding. They are also autistic, polyamorous, and kinky. Find out what that means to Finley in this episode. We also talk about the connection between facets of identity including gender, neurodivergence, polyamory and kink, feeling safe to be authentic, reclaiming childhood and nurturing the inner child, misconceptions about kink and sex work, body appreciation and recovering from an eating disorder, and trying to function in a society that's constructed for people who are not disabled. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/finley 

    91. HARRIS EDDIE HILL #2: agender, non-binary, trans (with a dash of 'boy')

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2023 65:48


    Harris Eddie Hill is a podcaster, best-selling author and coach. Harris's pronouns are they/them or ey/em, and they are agender, non-binary, and trans (with a dash of 'boy'). Find out what that means to Harris in this episode. We also talk about being on testosterone, embodying queerness in intimate relationships, finding safety in yourself, navigating family dynamics and having consensual conversations, the importance of having access to a supportive community, what it was like living through Section 28 times, allyship and inclusivity, and exploring kink. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/harris-2  You can now register your interest for our upcoming allyship course – go to www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/allyship-course, or navigate to the course page via the website menu, to be notified when it goes live.

    90. Ninety Shades of Gender: taking a break

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 29, 2022 10:33


    Esther is taking a break from creating new episodes for now, and talks about she came to that decision. Thank you to all our patrons, to those who bought us a coffee, donated, listened, shared and helped. Until next time! More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/90shades 

    89. CLEO MADELEINE: queer, trans, woman

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 15, 2022 74:57


    Cleo Madeleine is a researcher, activist, and poet. Cleo's pronouns are she/her, and she is queer, trans, and a woman. Find out what that means to Cleo in this episode. Join us as we briefly go down a rabbit hole of queer history and time, talking about the entanglement of sexuality and gender, linguistic limitations, the intersection of history, language, and identity, what is left out of history, the construct of normativity, levels of activism, and the many ways things can get lost in translation. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/cleo 

    88. LUX: queer, genderfluid, polygender, non-conforming man

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 1, 2022 55:26


    Lux is a psychotherapeutic counsellor and French expat, who has been in the UK for over ten years. Lux's pronouns are he/they, and he is a queer, genderfluid, polygender, non-conforming man. Find out what that means to Lux in this episode. We also talk about seeing labels as a field, the need for softness as well as radicality in activism, how gender identity is separate from gender expression, the pathologising of queer identities, not being able to simplify your complexity into a static gender, how gender plurality and sexual fluidity intertwine, and not leaving any part of us out. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/lux 

    87. BRIANNE LEESON: autigender, bisexual, polyamorous, demi-romantic

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 18, 2022 55:39


    Brianne Leeson is a writer, artist, and voice actor, and the creator of the supernatural comedy audio drama, Today's Lucky Winner. Brianne's pronouns are she/her, and she is autigender, as well as bisexual, polyamorous, and demi-romantic. Find out what that means to Brianne in this episode. We also talk about doing womanhood differently and the infinite flavours of gender and gender expression, accidental polyamory and unpacking social and religious conditioning, what we can learn about communication from autistic people, sensory issues and how they shape expression, finding freedom in embracing your neurodivergence, and questioning everything. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/brianne 

    86. IZZY KERSHAW: transgender woman, bisexual, ADHD

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 4, 2022 39:57


    Izzy Kershaw is a singer/songwriter and music producer. Izzy's pronouns are she/her, and she is a transgender woman. She's also bisexual and has ADHD. Find out what that means to Izzy in this episode. We also talk about how big a part of identity gender is and how that can change, the importance of making the distinction between sex and gender in healthcare, being trans in the music industry, an enlightening acid trip, how music can take people on a journey, the innateness of gender from the perspective of brain science, and the desire to belong. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/izzy 

    85. VICTOR MARTINEZ: transgender, non-binary, pansexual, neurodiverse, ADHD

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 21, 2022 59:39


    Victor's pronouns are they/them, and they are transgender and non-binary, as well as pansexual, neurodiverse, and ADHD. Find out what that means to Victor in this episode. We also talk about being out as a trans person at work, having a different understanding of the same labels, normalising gender diversity in society, body dysmorphia and gender expression, transphobia in the media, unlocking aspects of identity, and the evolution of awareness. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/victor-2 

    84. KAI GREY: trans-masculine, transgender, queer (non-binary)

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 7, 2022 59:42


    Kai is a Garden Designer and consultant, and CEO at Polaris Garden & Landscape Architects. Kai's pronouns are he/him, and he is trans-masculine, transgender, queer, and a tad non-binary. Find out what that means to Kai in this episode.. We also talk about the importance of representation, experiencing intimacy and sex and navigating expected as well as unexpected changes being on T (testosterone), consent and re-establishing boundaries, separating masculinity and femininity from body parts, qualities, and dynamics like dominance & submission, and never being done with transitioning. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/kai 

    83. LOLA PHOENIX: agender, non-binary, queer

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 23, 2022 86:45


    Lola Phoenix is a writer, podcaster, and author of the recently published book The Anxious Person's Guide to Non-Monogamy. Lola's pronouns are they/them, and they are agender, non-binary, and queer. Find out what that means to Lola in this episode. We also talk about being accidentally gender non-conforming, not relating to normative experiences, prioritising action over language, the power in choosing our response, what we do versus who we are, the similarities between an unconventional gender journey and exploring alternative relationship styles, solidarity and the need to unite, the importance of understanding and regulating our nervous system, and being safe within ourselves. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/lola 

    82. ANGELA LOCASHIO: autistic, queer, genderqueer woman

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 9, 2022 48:48


    Angela Locashio (aka Mama Pistachio) is a trauma-informed educator and coach, and sexologist. Angela's pronouns are she/her, and she says she's always open to they/them. She is an autistic, queer, genderqueer woman. Find out what that means to Angela in this episode. We also talk about following social scripts and role playing, how authenticity and performance are not mutually exclusive, vulnerability, understanding all parts of ourselves, how we are wired to choose acceptance over authenticity, being yourself in the workplace, the intersection between gender and neurodivergence, and how we are all normal. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/angela 

    81. FLEASSY MALAY: queer, gender-diverse, neurodiverse, genderfluid woman

    Play Episode Listen Later May 26, 2022 57:03


    Fleassy Malay is a poet, spoken word artist, performer, and writer. Fleassy uses they/them and she/her pronouns, and they are a queer, gender-diverse, neurodiverse genderfluid woman. Find out what that means to Fleassy in this episode. We also talk about embracing the validity of the phases we go through, belonging in both women's spaces and queer spaces, inclusive language and adding more nuance to conversations, internalised shame and being willing to confront our own conditioning, having observations rather than answers, how sacred rage can change the world, and playing in all the spaces. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/fleassy 

    80. ANNE HODDER-SHIPP: queer femme, neurodivergent, ADHD (agender, non-binary, demigirl)

    Play Episode Listen Later May 12, 2022 55:56


    Anne Hodder-Shipp is a sex and relationship educator dedicated to providing accurate, empowered, compassionate, and expansive sex education. Anne's pronouns are she/they, and she is a queer femme. They're also neurodivergent with a recent ADHD diagnosis. She doesn't have language that totally feels right, but says that sometimes agender, non-binary, and demigirl work. Find out what that means to Anne in this episode. We also talk about not having a sense of belonging, feeling safe in your skin, self-soothing and meeting yourself where you're at, upholding meaning over language at all cost, how the gender binary is weaponised, that a new awareness of reality is often accompanied by a mourning process, looking at love languages through a different lens, and reframing the concepts of love, touch, and relationships. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/anne 

    79. CHRISTINE TOKLEY: trans woman, non-conforming, disabled, neurodivergent

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 28, 2022 93:44


    Christine's pronouns are she/her, and she's ok with they/them pronouns. She identifies as a trans woman and is also non-conforming, disabled and neurodivergent. Find out what that means to Christine in this episode. We also talk about how the spectrum of physical biological sex and that of the social construct of gender overlap, the idea of sex dysphoria rather than gender dysphoria, medical transition vs social transition and being comfortable on the inside first, supporting people in a way that works for them, the difference in how we all perceive reality including gender, the need for nuance as well as simplification, how being aware of intention can benefit communication, and building bridges between our understanding and others'. CW: paraphilia, autogynephilia. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/christine  Meeting Christine was the inspiration for the book chapter Esther contributed to the multi-author book Sacred Redesign – How to free yourself from society's standards and create heaven on earth. It's available on Amazon now: find links to purchase on https://estherlemmens.com/ 

    78. CLAIRE PROSHO: transgender woman, bisexual, ADHD

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 14, 2022 82:45


    Claire's pronouns are she/her, and she is a transgender woman. Find out what that means to Claire in this episode. We also talk about the lack of female role models in the 70s, trying to reconcile the expected side and the authentic side of us, the entanglement of gender, mental health and neurodivergence, feeling like yourself for the first time, reframing gendered activities, identifying as vs identifying with, gender alignment rather than transition, and having more stories to tell. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/claire 

    77. JENN: genderfree, autistic, fat

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 31, 2022 55:59


    Jenn sets up websites and tech systems for micro businesses. Jenn doesn't have much of an attachment to pronouns and says they or she are fine. They are genderfree, and she also gave us the labels autistic and fat. Find out what that means to Jenn in this episode. We also talk about choosing your own gender badges, the absurdity of assigned gender roles, being conscious of gender-neutral language, how autism in women is underdiagnosed, the limited choices when it comes to clothes, the balance of body neutrality, the various struggles fat people face, and putting the rainbow first rather than it being an afterthought. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/jenn 

    76. SKIN: queer

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2022 45:43


    Skin is the singer of the rock band Skunk Anansie, a radio show and podcast host, and author. Skin's pronouns are she/her, and she is a queer person. Find out what that means to Skin in this episode. We also talk about stepping stones to new language, the obsession with beauty in the gay community, breaking gender roles, given names and designing your own sense of self, a cultural sense of identity, expanding on feminism, marriage and motherhood, chosen family and learning how to love each other, staying open and giving people a chance to change their minds, and how we need to join forces and stop fighting each other. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/skin 

    75. Reflections (part 3): discoveries so far

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 3, 2022 67:35


    In this third Reflections episode, Katy interviews Esther as she reflects on further conversations she's had with gender-diverse folks, what she's learned about gender, as well as her own journey and how she and the podcast have evolved over a year and a half since the podcast started. We also talk about imposter syndrome, intuition and following the flow, prioritising self-care, expanding on pronouns, improvising and thinking on the spot, reclaiming labels, coming out of the spiritual closet, how the lines between being on the outside and being on the inside are blurring, and that being an ally benefits us all; not just those we are being allies for. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/reflections-3/ 

    74. A Clear Perspective on gender: a channeled message from Oron and Medha

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 17, 2022 34:50


    This is an episode with a spiritual twist. I have a conversation with Oron, through Medha. Medha is an intuitive energy healer and channeler – to be exact, a direct voice channel – and she has a podcast called A Clear Perspective, where she shares the guidance that comes through from Oron in answer to people's questions. Oron start by talking about what it takes for Medha to allow this energy to come through, and then about expansion and going beyond right and wrong, external and internal division, how truth lies on a spectrum, reclaiming your sense of self-worth, power versus force, coming into inner harmony, what self-love really is, and returning to wholeness. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/clear-perspective 

    73. PAIGE LOEWEN: partner of a transgender woman

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 3, 2022 50:58


    Paige is married to a transgender woman, Esther (or Elle), who came out to her in October 2020. They've been married for 16 years and have two children. Find out more about Paige's experience in this episode. We also talk about being married to a troubled person, becoming more bold and growing into your skin, learning to communicate our needs, the freedom in speaking our truth, going through your own journeys together, that it's ok to not put a label on yourself, and how we may find ourselves in one closet or another. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/paige 

    72. TALEA BOELSEMS: agender, metagender

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 20, 2022 69:04


    Talea uses any pronouns, and they are agender and metagender. Find out what that means to Talea in this episode. We get philosophical and dig deeper into gender identity, and we talk about the challenges with finding language for something just beyond our grasp, nature vs nurture and what is innate in our identity, and peeling away layers and finding nothing. As we start to wrap up the conversation, some more really juicy things came up, so we keep going for another 10 minutes or so after I thank Talea for sharing her experience. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/talea 

    71. RENÉE YOXON: trans, non-binary, genderqueer, maverique

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 6, 2022 45:01


    Renée Yoxon is a singer, songwriter, and gender-affirming voice teacher. Renée's pronouns are they/them, and they are non-binary trans. They also identify as maverique and back in the day, genderqueer. Find out what that means to Renée in this episode. We also talk about being who you are right now, bridging the trans and cis experience, how 'passing' is morally neutral, internal vs societal perception of gender, simultaneously upholding and tearing down gender binaries, and how the voice is more nurture than nature. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/renee

    70. REV ROWAN BOMBADIL: genderqueer shapeshifter & sex witch

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 23, 2021 83:02


    Rowan Bombadil is a psychosexual coach and interfaith minister, dedicated to bridging the binaries between sex and spirit. Rowan's pronouns are they/them/their, and they are a genderqueer shapeshifter and sex witch. Find out what that means to Rowan in this episode. We also talk about deconstructing boxes and binaries, the link between gender, sex and magic, reclaiming the body and revealing more of ourselves, roleplay vs shapeshifting, multiplicity and spanning the gender spectrum, transformation through intention, and celebrating the sacred in ourselves. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/rowan 

    69. ZELDA: intersex, trans-adjacent, disabled

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 9, 2021 57:12


    Zelda is a performer and magician. Zelda is happy for people to use the pronouns they feel are appropriate. She is intersex and disabled, and refers to herself as trans-adjacent. Find out what that means to Zelda in this episode. We also talk about using fun vs boring as decision-making criteria as opposed to male vs female, having a gender identity as fluid as a body identity, knowing the science versus living the science, giving hope by being yourself, being a bridge between dualities, lucky genetic quirks, and being a special case. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/zelda 

    68. ESTHER LOEWEN: transgender woman

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 25, 2021 54:24


    Esther Loewen uses she/her pronouns, and she is a transgender woman. She also identifies as a parent, spouse, pastor, professional includer, and queer. Find out what that means to Esther in this episode. We also talk about how coming out is an ongoing process, questions to ask yourself on the gender journey, finding hope in spirituality after trauma, grieving the loss of vocation, taking a leap of faith, embracing how god made us, integrating and honouring the old self, and entering the next chapter in life with dignity and grace. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/esther 

    67. LEONIE DAWSON: non-binary

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 11, 2021 57:06


    Leonie Dawson is a proudly neurodivergent multi-passionate entrepreneur, author, podcaster, prolific course creator and massive swear bear. Leonie's pronouns are she/they, and they are non-binary. Find out what that means to Leonie in this episode. We also talk about honouring the land we inhabit, the freedom that came from adding a 'they' pronoun while having a 'she' experience, being non-conforming in business, the importance of having open and honest money conversations, knowing who you are inside and standing for what you believe in, kicking the social media habit, and smashing the patriarchy by being more of yourself. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/leonie 

    66. ANNA SANSOM: genderqueer, gender-responsive, woman, queer dyke

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 28, 2021 53:22


    In this episode, I have a conversation with Anna Sansom, a writer, author of erotic fiction and also author of the book Desire Lines, which is a combination of memoir, erotica, and an invitation to reflective self-inquiry. Anna's pronouns are she/her. She experiences herself as genderqueer and feels herself to be gender-responsive. Find out what that means to Anna in this episode. We also talk about the energetic space between people, being responsive vs being reactive, how boxes can be constricting as well as expansive, playing with gender and sexuality, reclaiming the word 'dyke', self-healing through sexual experiences, liberating ourselves and writing our own story, pursuing desire, and why it's more than ok to want more out of life. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/anna 

    65. Listener Questions (1): terminology explained

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 14, 2021 22:56


    This episode is a slightly different one again; the first of a Listener Questions series. I'm answering a question (or rather, responding to a request) from one of our listeners, Connie, who said "I would love to hear a podcast on the definition of terms used on the podcasts." So here it is! More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/listener-questions-1 

    64. BRIAN BELOVITCH: cis-gay male of trans experience

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 30, 2021 58:41


    Brian Belovitch is an author, actor and activist. Brian's pronouns are he/him/his, and he identifies as a cis-gay male of trans experience. Find out what that means to Brian in this episode. We also talk about being different and growing up in the 60s and 70s, looking for validation, living a fantasy life, performing the role of perfect woman, dealing with judgement, how everyone's journey is unique, finding a different way to be comfortable, and going full circle and reaching a new destination. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/brian 

    63. JEN HARTMANN: non-binary, bigender

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 23, 2021 40:57


    Jen Hartmann is a fashion designer and founder of the trans-positive label Baal Fashion. Jen is pretty much ok with all the traditional pronouns, but prefers he/him. He is non-binary and also identifies as bigender. Find out what that means to Jen in this episode. We also talk about growing up with a very gendered language, being expected to fit into cultural and gendered stereotypes, disrupting the fashion industry and the future of innovation, how clothes are an integral part of gender expression, navigating entrepreneurship and the challenges that come with doing your own thing, surrendering to divine timing, and that one size does not fit all. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/jen 

    62. JACOB PROFITT: non-binary, gay, drag queen

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 16, 2021 36:04


    Jacob Profitt is a geography teacher. Jacob's pronouns are they/them, and they identify as a gay non-binary person. Find out what that means to Jacob in this episode. We also talk about the freedom that comes with going to university, societal conditioning around masculine and feminine binaries, exploring gender identity through drag, being non-binary in education, feeling attracted to male presenting people as opposed to masculinity, and being inspired by a younger generation. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/jacob 

    61. DOROTHY 'THYO' PIERRE-LOUIS: non-binary, trans-masculine, bigender, toric, graysexual

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 9, 2021 45:40


    Dorothy Pierre-Louis uses he/him/his pronouns, and his nickname is Thyo (pronounced like Theo). He is non-binary and also uses the labels bigender and trans-masculine, as well as toric and graysexual. Find out what that means to Thyo in this episode. Thyo (pronounced like Theo) is a simple urban animal who resides with his friends in a cozy den in Philadelphia. He currently works as a technical recruiter and aspires to make it in the entertainment/media industry as a writer. This dream is slightly hindered by the fact that Thyo is a recovering survivor of the Ivy League education system. As such, he has a complicated relationship with writing and will likely never write ever again. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/dorothy 

    60. EMME PORTER DeWITT: agender [transgender, nonbinary], queer [demisexual+]

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 2, 2021 55:59


    Emme Porter DeWitt is an author, advocate, and authenticity coach. Emme's pronouns are they/them/theirs. They are agender and also identify as transgender, non-binary, queer and demisexual. Find out what that means to Emme in this episode. We also talk about how we all have our own unique flavour of humanity, making sense of attractions, the importance of emotional connection, building your own blueprint for relationships, the possibilities in the term queer, being a solo advocate, how parents can build a healthy relationship with their gender-expansive kids, and getting rid of the boxes altogether. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/emme 

    59. VICTOR MARTINEZ: non-binary, transgender, pansexual, panromantic

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 26, 2021 58:39


    Victor's pronouns are they/them, and they are non-binary and transgender, as well as pansexual and panromantic. Find out what that means to Victor in this episode. We also talk about identifying vs being, the freedom in expressing yourself, that clothes have no gender, connection to culture, having an awareness of your own mental health, processing out loud, and how gender expression is for yourself rather than others. More on www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/victor 

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