The 20 Minute Man Hour

Welcome back! It's been two years since we recorded an episode and we missed you. This one is a long catchup that was long overdue! Listen in as we talk about how our lives have evolved and perhaps most importantly, how we now understand a bit more of what Michael Singer was talking about in that book The Surrender Experiment.

We're not talking about a guy named Art who is forcing you to surrender. Nope. We are talking today about an amazing experience Scott had inside a piece of art by James Turrell. The confusion of what he was seeing forced his brain to abandon logic, aka the operating system of the ego. Instead he had to surrender to the confusion and enjoy the experience. David had a similar experience battling the ego before finally being beat into submission. Funny thing, while surrender seems unenviable, we both felt an amazing release of tension that left peace and joy in its place. Tap into trust. Just try it. We won't force you to surrender but you just might enjoy it if you give it a try!

Life is easy. So fucking easy. It wasn't always this way for us. Listen in today as we talk about how we learned a different approach to life that accelerated change. Now instead of manipulating the external world to get some results to make us happy we go to the blueprint level of reality and kick ass there. Makes life so easy!

Everyone seems to love hacking lately. This week we talk about hacking the nonconscious mind to create a new physical reality around you. Which of course just means hack your mind to get hot chicks. Cause that's what we are into.

David shares some really great affirmations in today's pod that he has been using in his life. Things like "I allow myself to be hated and made fun of," "I allow myself to be unattractive" and "I allow myself to have awkward, weird, disappointing sex." Tune in to hear what he is doing with these really uplifting affirmations.

Hello! We wanted to take some time to update you dear listener on all kinds of stuff going on in our lives. Following your excitement can change things quickly sometimes! Scott quit his job, got neutered, and spent a week in Sedona. David's still fertile and in Prague...for the moment. Watch out ladies cause he doesn't know where he'll end up next!

Today Scott talks about upgrading his life. He had a sweet arrangement on a corporate job but it wasn't fully in alignment with who he is. So he quit. And in the process of this upgrade his fear voice started a war that was fascinating to watch. Listen in to hear if he survives this mental ambush.

David's divorce is final. To celebrate, the guys talk about the arc of his relationship through marriage and divorce. Tune in to hear how one guy follows his resonance even when that means making some tough decisions others might not like.

David caught an interesting show on TV the other day called Naked Attraction. He flipped on the channel and saw 6 vaginas, and two guys talking about what the differences were. What David took away was the reminder that different people are into different things. The guys talk about how you can quit judging yourself because other people aren't even going to see the same 'faults' you see in yourself. Be the authentic you. Accept and love yourself by doing what excites you - that is authentically you! And let attraction sort itself out along the way which is a great way to find someone who really loves you.

This time we go deep, fast. What if we each experience a unique, subjective reality that operates by it's own rules? That would mean so many of our disagreements are moot because we are assuming there is an objective world to argue over. Instead we can choose to look at our experience as a unique world, where we can create however we choose. And the awesome thing with this theory is that we can share our unique experience with other people and listen to theirs...without thinking they are wrong or their different experience means something about our experience. Instead we can just take it as inspiration, seeing new possibilities, new things we can create in our experience. Shrink your world, take full responsibility, create what you want...if that resonates for you. If not, then you are obviously wrong. And we should fight over that.

David just moved, moving his entire belongings in two suitcases and a backpack. Scott is reading a book on decluttering using Feng Shui principles. Today we talk about how freeing and energizing it can be to get rid of old stuff, including old beliefs and memories. Dump the old shit and free up your mind for new ideas, new beliefs, empty space to create new things. See what happens. You might be way more excited about the stuff you keep, and you might find new sources of money, new opportunities, and a bunch of new ideas! Set your clutter free and see!

David visited a Quantum Wizard and (shazam!) he upgraded his life. He underwent a shift from stress and anxiety around money and his business to a place of freedom and fun. All this from the instantaneous shift in beliefs. Yeah, it is that easy - Scott does it all the time with people. 95% of our processing is beyond our conscious mind so you can be operating on limiting beliefs and not even know it. Make these shifts from fear and limits to freedom and fun with no struggle at all. Your day to day experience just might be amazing after.

David ran a study on himself and found out he used to be annoying. He used to cite studies all the time but now questions the validity of science. He no longer looks to studies to figure out how to live. He was living in a world of logic where something was missing...the experience of life. The guys go on to question the very idea behind science that there is an objective world to measure. Perhaps it is all subjective. Quantum physics seems to think so with its flashy parallel universes and all.

This week we get back to our favorite topic - dating. David and Scott talk about recent dating experiences where they broke their rules, dating women who had things wrong with them. Of course the only thing wrong was their judgement of these women. Limiting beliefs are often the only things standing between us and what we really want. Listen in as we talk about how true power and freedom comes from surrendering your limiting beliefs and trusting your full self completely. It makes all the difference in the world. Try it yourself!

Turns out David and Scott have both been around people talking about the world getting crazier. But the crazy thing is their worlds have gotten so much less crazy. They've chosen the world they want and have created that world. The biggest key? Relax your instance on your beliefs being true, including the one you have about the world going to shit. Make the world malleable by allowing it to be. Tune in to hear practical and metaphysical takes on creating whatever kind of world you want to live in.

Your dating app rates you based on your attractiveness. David talks about how this is affecting attractiveness of couples. Turns out the best looking men on apps only get liked by 40% of women. That means that even for the best looking guy there is going to be a lot of getting turned down by women. So keep going! Also, as Aziz Ansari points out, often times a neutral dating experience can turn exciting on date 5 or 6. Might want to experiment with that one since attraction shifts and grows as people get to know each other. Don't try too hard to evaluate a potential date online, see it as an introduction avenue and meet in person ASAP. Introduction sites and apps, not dating apps.

You can carry on acquiring women to feel better about yourself or you can choose to start inviting women to experience your awesome life. Inspired by John Cooper's insights in Game Over, we talk about how an acquisition mindset when it comes to dating and relationships is not the most effective way to go. It's a bit like trying to comb the mirror to fix your hair. Scott shares an inspiring tale of his experience putting this shift to work on a very subtle level in his life. This isn't just about womanizers or players, this can be a very subtle force operating on a deep level in your life too!

Scott surprises David with a question philosophers and religions have struggled with for centuries, and David actually gets an answer. Completely profound or utter bullshit - you decide! Along the way we discuss brain programming, the true essence of a person, and what happens when you make gods out of UPS drivers.

What if “hard work” and struggling to make money is bullshit? What if the rules we have about money are the real reasons we don't have more of the experiences we want? What if no one cares? Well, Scott and David do, and in this episode they discuss failing at business and dying alone, a dude with a billion dollar company, a rich dating life, happiness, and how money really works (maybe).

Scott puts David on the spot with a surprise question. Thanks to this podcast, his uncomfortable answer is recorded for all time. We talk about nice guy syndrome, being excited about sex, and even the nude model economy. Some bits in here are likely to be surprising for men and women alike!

Today's episode is all about David's anxiety inducing attempts to not end up homeless. He's looking for an apartment and stumbles across a business trying to scare him. They are marketing fear as a business model. We talk about the consequences of making decisions out of fear because whether inside your brain, or a business, fear shuts down higher order thinking and then we make crap decisions. Best way to avoid that messy scenario is by listening to this episode.

In part 2 of our popular Shitty Life series, David gets a wedgie in 6th grade and his life goes to shit. All because of the sweatpants. Listen in as we explore David's experience with the themes covered in the documentary The Mask You Live In. We all get a message to behave a certain way, to man up. Follow David's path from seeking others' approval through to waking up and learning how to do his own thing, thereby leaving his shitty life behind.

Don't be a pussy. That's the message boys get growing up. Don't be weak. Man up. For Scott that meant hiding any pain or difficulty while growing up. If you don't, you'll likely be ostracized. Watching the documentary The Mask You Live In made it abundantly clear that most guys go through their own version of hiding pain as they become men. That means we all have these stories of feeling like we were alone, we sucked at life, we were flawed in some way...different guys experience differently. But we all go through it so let's share it and recognize life can be awesome on the other side of it. This is Scott's story.

Workplaces can be dehumanizing. David worked in a social enterprise company that wanted to change the world for the better, but skipped over making life better for their employees. Often people make the same mistake by trying to control external circumstances to be happy instead of controlling their inner response, where they have the most control. Start inside, then work out for best results in life and business. It's the human way to live and work.

Scott went to Africa, using it as a proving ground for lots of changes he'd been implementing in his life and found the shifts worked. Perfectly. Life upgraded, he's graduated and there's no going back to living life the old way. That leads into a discussion about which parts of life are worth controlling, and which parts to completely quit controlling. You've got to control yourself!

Has your new year's resolution already come and gone? Then you'll get a kick out of the reasons why Scott and David don't like resolutions. And if your resolution is still going strong, tune in for some ideas on how to go bigger!

This week we dig into The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer. Yes, this is a book report episode. And in it, you'll learn how you too can start meditating alone in the woods today and end up head of a billion dollar business 30 years from today! This book is a lot of fun, with some really powerful concepts and a lot of surprises. It's about what happens when you let go of what you want to live a life of flow that is much bigger than you could ever imagine. Instead of giving it all away here, just listen. Good times!

95% of your thoughts today are the same as yesterday. Everything in our lives begins with thoughts. If we are having the same thoughts, we'll end up taking the same actions and life becomes like that awesome movie Groundhog Day. How do we increase the % of new thoughts to break the cycle of repetition and change our lives? Tune in to find out because this episode is full of new thoughts.

To be innovative you need to quit thinking from the past. Staying tied to your ideas of reality that are shaped by past experiences can prevent you from seeing options in your current reality. It keeps you from new thoughts because your mind can only imagine outcomes you've already experienced. If for no other reason, tune in to hear David and Scott reenact a local newscast. You need to know how that mattress in lanes is going to affect your evening commute!

Travelling opens your mind and can show you what is possible, inside yourself. That break of routine showed David that he has been missing opportunities to talk to hot women, and other people. Thoughts got in the way. The mind can be fun that way. But it doesn't have to. We can reprogram our minds just like a computer. And when a new program is running in the unconscious mind, new behaviors happen automatically. Just like fucking magic! Go on a trip, or just break your normal routine, and see what is possible in your life!

Here's a recommendation - go read Love by Leo Buscaglia. It's fucking awesome. Should be required reading for anyone in, or who might one day be in a relationship. Yeah, that means you. This week we riff on some themes in the book. Leo brilliantly points out that you wouldn't trust your car to a mechanic without training, or your money to a broker who hasn't studied his trade, but we are willing to trust our lives, our futures to a partner who hasn't studied love. That's the deep thought for the day.

Scott gets shot down in a business partnership and a relationship, both in the same day. What would have been a devastating day a couple years ago, was actually an awesome adventure. The trick was not reducing the complexity of the moment by labelling it just one thing. Taking the lazy route has immense costs! We talk about that process as well as how to transcend disappointment instead of fearfully defending yourself. The aggressive reaction only validates the fear. We also talk about a huge trap people fall into when something they want doesn't work out.

David read a book that got him excited about his limits. This week we talk about quaker group coaching, which sounds awesome. That and how limitations are great. The saying that you can do whatever you want is bullshit. We aren't all the same, we have different paths, different passions. Follow them.

Dogs have it figured out - they simply follow the treats. They never get stuck believing it is responsible to stay in the living room where there are no treats, all the while longing to be in the other room where the treats are being handed out. We can learn something here. Our version of dog treats (a motivator to get us to move) is excitement. What excites you? Go do that. Repeat over and over again. And you just might have a better life. We talk about this theory and explore how easy life can be, if we let it.

We shake things up today and spend the podcast talking about Office Space, one of the best movies ever. It does such a brilliant job of illustrating what happens when you quit playing a role (doing shit you think you need to do) and start doing what you actualy want to do in every moment of your life. Spoiler Alert: It leads you to a much happier life. This isn't just a movie fantasy, we'll talk about how these principles check out in real life.

In this episode we address some great listener responses from our Healthy Thought Nut episode. Thanks dear listeners for the perfect opportunity to clarify. Becoming a healthy thought nut empowers you to take control of your thoughts instead of passively being a victim to them. And the idea isn't to live in a cave...we talk about how to integrate this concept into your normal life even if your friends aren't healthy thought nuts yet. Keep the listener feedback coming!

Scott talks about his healthy thought cleanse and the challenges of maintaining the cleanse while on a road trip. He's on a mission to rewire his brain in a wildly positive way which affects health, happiness, and brain functioning. Tune in for tips about how to shift your thinking from negative to positive to change your experience of life every single day.

Maybe you've heard the theory of 10,000 hours, a success theory that is bandied about in the human potential world. This week David and Scott talk about some of the limits of this theory and how adhering to it could justify workaholism. This somewhat arbitrary goal isn't necessary to live a good life. Instead, do whatever the fuck you want with your time and your will end up looking pretty good.

David tells the story of the birth of his company, Love & Profit. Maybe you can relate - feeling unfulfilled with life in the corporate world, he quit and took a break. He stopped making decisions based on fear and ended up creating his dream company. If what you are doing isn't working, stop. Take a break. It'll be fun! Do something different. To get something different, you need to do something different.

Scott has spent a lot of time thinking about platonic touch and sex in our culture. But it took a date to point out that his need for touch could serve as a great motivator. In the end, he realized the desire for simple touch, human contact, could be seen as a driver to propel him forward into a loving relationship instead of merely a problem to solve on his own. Scott and David talk about how many people run a touch deficiency without even knowing it. We've studied this effect in babies, but there isn't much talk about it in the adult realm....until now. Tune in for a conversation about touch and sex (they are different things) and you just might learn something new about yourself!

Frustration in your business is no fun. Let it build and you'll lose your energy, drive, and passion - your vitality. It isn't about what the world is doing to you, it is about what you are not doing to the world. Scott talks about this Buckminster Fuller question he uses to deal with frustration: “What is it on this planet that needs doing that I know something about, which probably won't happen unless I take responsibility for it?” Acting on the answer is a great way to get back on your purpose of fully expressing yourself in life.

Your morning routine is so important. What you think and do when you start your day influences how your entire day unfolds. David and Scott both agree that the morning is the best time to dedicate to changing your life. Listen in as David talks about his 4 hour daily routine...for about 4 hours.

Often times collaboration is the way nature works best, not competition as we've been led to believe. You can use this idea in your business, your personal life, and your gardening experiments. We also talk about how to tap your imagination for new ideas when you are just plain sick of doing things the same way you always have.

David was sick, he watched an episode of Game of Thrones, he started crying, and the next day he was healed. Tune in to find out more about the magical healing properties of HBO shows, how to pay attention to emotions without adding stories, and why it isn't helpful to avoid feelings in life. Because really, most adults don't want to end up bawling on the couch watching HBO to heal themselves.

Turns out, watching (or reading) the news while trying to live a happy life is like trying to enjoy your filet mignon while sitting in the restaurant's dumpster surrounded by trash. Good luck with that!

Can our thoughts really make shit appear in life? Yeah, we're going there and talking about manifesting. Many years ago, Scott's crazy college showed him it was possible to play games making things appear in unexpected ways. Ride along as we talk about how our thoughts very directly affect our physical reality.

Everyone wants to be a grower in business. But maybe that just isn't your thing. Keeping it small might be in your best interest. Don't blindly listen to the prevailing wisdom in business or life. Instead choose your size and make that happen. In this, you do have a choice about your size.

Listen, paying too much attention to your results will mess with your head. Scott talks about how when the outcomes are bad, it steals our motivation. When good, we can get stuck trying to live up to that previous standard. It isn't about the results so forget them or risk getting blocked. Focus on the process. Move forward, putting in your best effort, and you'll build momentum while suceeding the only part you can actually control - your own effort.

David reconnects with his childhood dream of being a standup comedian. Meanwhile, Scott laughs his ass off. Tune in to hear how dusting off your long forgotten childhood dream can make your life, and your work, so much more fun!

What's that burning you feel? If it is a burning while peeing, you should go get that checked out immediately. Never a good idea to let Chlamydia rage untended. But if it is a burning desire you feel, then you are on the right track to kick ass in your business. Listen in as we talk about a necessary ingredient in attaining any goal - the all important burning desire.

This week Scott talks about his experience skateboarding for the first time since 8th grade. We talk about Lanny Bassham's tricks for using visualization and identity to accelerate learning and make it a lot more fun. Lots of great stuff in here for you to hack your learning process!