SOUL FOOD

Losing someone to suicide hits differently. It's confusing, heartbreaking, and leaves a kind of pain that words can't really touch. Sometimes it's anger, sometimes it's guilt, and sometimes it's just numbness. In this episode, Caroline and I talk to Lynnette about the heavy reality of suicide trauma. How it affects those left behind, what grief can look like because it's not that simple, and how we can take small steps toward healing, even when it feels impossible.This conversation is raw, it's real, and if you're carrying this kind of pain, you're not alone. You can look for Lynnette or her team at https://remindpsych.co/ “In the hustle and bustle of daily life it's easy to handle the tangible, the concrete and the obvious. We get caught up in many small goals; from traffic jams to reaching the next career level, from getting a degree to getting married, we just hop from one goal to another mindlessly because society has deemed it valuable. In the midst of this, we often lose sight of what matters the most to keep us going, our core, our values; the sanctity of our Mind that holds these together. Here at Re:mind, the Mind and it's wonders to help people thrive is and has always been our priority.”_______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Guest: @lynnettechaiVideo: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

This isn't just another deep conversation, this one matters. When it comes to sexual abuse, so many people stay silent out of fear, shame, or not knowing what to do next. But silence doesn't mean healing. And you don't have to go through it alone.In this episode, Caroline and I talk to Lynnette about what really happens after the unthinkable! We discuss what to do, who to turn to, and how to take the first step toward healing. It's heavy, it's real, and it's a conversation we need to have. You are not to blame. You are not alone. And there is help.You can look for Lynnette or her team at https://remindpsych.co/ “In the hustle and bustle of daily life it's easy to handle the tangible, the concrete and the obvious. We get caught up in many small goals; from traffic jams to reaching the next career level, from getting a degree to getting married, we just hop from one goal to another mindlessly because society has deemed it valuable. In the midst of this, we often lose sight of what matters the most to keep us going, our core, our values; the sanctity of our Mind that holds these together. Here at Re:mind, the Mind and it's wonders to help people thrive is and has always been our priority.”___________________________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Guest: @lynnettechaiVideo: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

“You should smile more.” or “Last time ah, we didn't have phones and we turned out fine.” or “If only you were hardworking like your neigbour.” Have you ever received advice from adults that are… CRINGE! Oh, we've heard it all. From outdated life hacks to guilt-tripping wisdom no one asked for. Sometimes it's less “helpful” and more “can you please stop”In this episode, Caroline and I had dig in the life of Joel and together share on the unnecessary advice we've gotten from well-meaning and lowkey clueless adults. Why do they do it? How do we respond without being rude? And is there ever a moment to just nod, smile, and walk away?_______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Guest: @samanthaasoupVideo: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

We all know that one person who loves to roast, tease, and push limits. But when does ‘just joking' turn into just hurtful? Is it on the person telling the joke or the one receiving it? And are we all just being too sensitive… or are some jokes too much? In this episode, Caroline and I had a great time with Joel to unpack the fine line between humor and harm. When is it all in good fun, and when is it straight-up toxic? We talked about boundaries, and why ‘it's just a joke' shouldn't be an excuse for immaturity._______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Guest: @joeltongkeVideo: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

Is dating someone older totally fine or kinda sus?Some say age is just a number. Others say it's a major red flag. But where's the line between a healthy, mature relationship and a confused state of dating? In this episode, Caroline and I had a great time with our friend Angelica who shared her own perspective of dating and marrying someone younger. We dive into the age gap debate, does dating someone older really make a difference? What are the challenges? And most importantly, will your friends ever stop judging? _______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Guest: @angelicawstVideo: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

#105 How to know you're over your ex? So, you think you're over your ex… but are you really?Yes… you're not crying over old texts anymore, and their name doesn't send you into an emotional breakdown moment. But what about when you hear your ‘us' song? Or when they suddenly pop up on your feed looking like life is treating them better? In this episode, Caroline and I break down some of the signs that you've officially moved on—no more fake healing or ‘I'm totally fine' lies. Because let's be real, getting over someone isn't just about time—it's about mindset._________________________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

Oh… She's just a friend…You're in a relationship, but you still have that one close friend of the opposite gender. Totally normal, right? Or is it a recipe for disaster? Does it build trust or just blur boundaries? And let's be real… Are you actually fine, or are you just pretending it's not confusing?In this episode, Caroline and I dive into the friendship vs. relationship tug-of-war. When is it healthy? When does it get messy? And how do we handle it without starring in our own relationship K-drama series?_______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

#103 HOW TO LOVE DIFFICULT PEOPLE ?We all have that person in our lives… The one who tests our patience daily and knows just what to say and do to bring out the lion in us… But how do we love them without losing our sanity? Where do we set boundaries? And is it possible to care for them without turning into a doormat?In this episode, Caroline and I get real about the struggle of loving people who are, well... a lot. Because let's be honest, some relationships take more grace than others._________________________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

Is friendly flirting okay? #102 Flirting… Friendly… Flirty? Totally harmless, right? Some say being playful is just part of human interaction. What is playful, and what is flirty? Others think it's basically emotional cheating. So where's the line? Is friendly flirting just flirting with danger?In this episode, Caroline and I dive into this hard-to-navigate situation. When is it all fun and games, and when does it cross the line? We talked about mixed signals, boundaries, and confusion._______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

"‘Just play hard to get.' ‘If they like you, they'll change.”Wait, who approved this nonsense!!! We've all heard some questionable dating advice, whether from well-meaning aunties, movies, or that one friend who's somehow always in a toxic situationship and single who gives the ‘best' dating tips. But what's the worst of the worst? Why do people keep falling for it?In this episode, get ready for some hard truths as Caroline and I dive into the most chaotic, cringe-worthy dating advice out there and break down what actually works.__________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

#100 PEOPLE PLEASER Are you the type to say ‘yes' just to feel like you belong in a friendship group? It feels like it is so important to get someone's approval. Being a people pleaser sounds nice until you realize you're running on empty, bottling up negative emotions, and lowkey resenting everyone… including yourself.In this episode, Caroline and I unpack the people-pleaser dilemma. What's the price of avoiding tough conversations? Why do we do it? What does it cost us? And most importantly, how do we set boundaries for ourselves without the guilt trip? Because saying ‘no' shouldn't feel like a crime._______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

Is the first kiss a big deal… or just another moment of romance?Some people treat it like a sacred rite of passage, while others..  “It's just a kiss.” Different individuals and cultures have a different take on this. Some see it as a major milestone, while others think it's just another greeting.So, does the first kiss really matter? Or is it just the movies making us overthink? In this episode, Caroline and I dive into the cultural differences, the hype, and whether that first smooch is as important as we think._______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunanVideo: @ccc.athhhAudio: @johnnny_wangDesign: @shrnwng

#98 Teach me senpai: When your ex is in the same circle with you In the previous episode, we tackled this very possible messy gray zone! Should you get out of the friend group after a breakup? Or should they? What's the protocol here? And how do we handle it like the “mature adults”? In this episode, Caroline and I had the privilege to talk with Celine as she recounts and tells the experiences she went through. Buckle up! The stories are a good mix of sweet, sour, bitter, and salty! _______________________________________________________________Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Guest: @_cc_syilling Video: @ccc.athhh Audio: @johnnny_wang Design: @shrnwng

#97 When your ex is in the same circle with you So, you broke up with your partner… but does that mean you have to break up with their friends too? Like, hold up.. aren't they your friends now? If anyone should be doing the unfriending, it's your ex, not you. Because you're fabulous and probably the better friend anyway.  Ever been caught in this messy gray zone? Should you get out of the friend group after a breakup? Or should they? What's the protocol here? And how do we handle it like the “mature adults”? In this episode, Caroline and I talk about navigating this sticky situation. Spoiler alert: it's complicated, but we've got thoughts. _______________________________________________________________ Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhh Audio: @johnnny_wang Design: @shrnwng

#96 TEACH ME SENPAI: HOW I WISH MY PARENTS TALKED TO ME.  Let's be real… Who hasn't been in that awkward situation where your parents start nagging before they even hear you out? And yes, maybe we messed up, but wouldn't it be nice if they just sat down and listened first? In this episode, Caroline and I had an absolute blast chatting with Catherine about her relationship with her mom. We dived into the BIG question: Is it really possible to have a two-way conversation between generations? And if it is… How can we actually make it happen? _______________________________________________________________ Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Guest: Catherine Video: @ccc.athhh Audio: @johnnny_wang Design: @shrnwng

Are you exhausted from never finding 'the one'? Maybe it's time to stop dating losers! I mean, what even makes someone a 'loser'? Is it their habits? Their vibe? Or maybe… it's us, holding on when we should let go. In this episode, Caroline and I are breaking down the red flags, the green lights, and the questions you NEED to ask yourself. _______________________________________________________________ Host: @danielkuilan | @carolinetambunan Video: @ccc.athhh Audio: @johnnny_wang Design: @shrnwng

ARE YOU A DIFFICULT PERSON? or do you find someone you love tough to handle? Oh man, this is a hard pill to swallow when it comes to our self-evaluation and finding out that we are so fixated on what we think is right and hold others victim to our views and opinions. What hurts? When we hear that we are different from the people we love. In this episode, Caroline and I talked about handling the frustrations, learning how to confront and the focus on making relationships healthier!

Is there a RED FLAG that would make you say NO to the most good-looking, perfectly pleasing, well-behaved person? I mean, what dictates the success between two individuals who are in love: Body odor? Wearing sandals? Playing games? In this episode, Caroline and I got sincere with our experience, identifying what should be the actual RED FLAGS and saying YES to the person of your dream without immaturely dismissing them!

Is it right or a mature thing to do when you block someone on social media? You find yourself in an unhealthy competition leading to comparisons, drowning in the toxicity of comments, or someone you know using your story against you without understanding the context. Worst, you might be stalked by a stalker! In this episode, Caroline and I talked about how if we are not aware, we might allow our social media to ruin our day by reacting emotionally and what are some of the essential steps to thread forward in this virtual world.

"But I gave her my best! Why is she saying that I don't love her?" Have your heard this before, or maybe you said it yourself? It's frustrating! In this episode, Caroline and I talked about how some couples fall into this argument when all they have to do is learn each other's love language.

"Bro... My girl doesn't let me play games tonight!" Is this phrase familiar to you? Well, I think boyfriends today out there might also tell their partner that gaming night is off! Are games bad? Are games good? So many people rage while they play, is that ok? In this episode, things got open and honest real quick as Caleb Lee and Daren Hee, my 2 favorite top gamers (in my opinion) share their views on healthy and toxic gaming.

Do we ever forget the pain from our past relationship? It's pretty crazy how people can experience a wave of emotions after ending a relationship years back! In this episode, Caroline and I got a little vulnerable and talked about the danger of not grieving properly after a breakup and how to deal with those feelings today.

It is sad to hear that someone ends a relationship due to the "feeling" they have about their partner, that they're "just too nice!" So, is being too nice a weakness? In this episode, Caroline and I discuss this peculiar behavior and how it affects the health of relationships!

Do you remember that defining moment in your teens when you realize your friend (that's a girl) isn't your "bro" buddy? There's something magical about high school romance! In this episode, I had a fun conversation with Derrick and Julian discussing what it's like in the high school dating scene. They were gracious and kind enough to have me share my thoughts about the thrill, the boundaries, and the beauty of falling in love young.

Someone somewhere is looking for love, out of the friend zone and to the endzone. I remember when magazines were my guide in getting the girl. And oh boy! There were good tips, and some were just blatantly wrong. In this episode, Caroline and I shared our views of how dangerous it is when we are not intentional about the information we are consuming and what it's like to prepare before getting into a relationship.

We live in a world where the possibility of packing up and leaving is attainable. A new job, new relationship, new opportunities! The grass is always greener on the other side, as many might say. But what is the fine line between quitting and pressing on? In this episode, Keith Tay and I talk about the reality and beauty of opportunities and the importance of having the right mindset and attitude wherever we are.

Frequently I would hear couples talk about how relationships would only work if it's split 50/50. If that's the case, is SACRIFICE necessary? I tried to find a synonymous, kinder word to describe SACRIFICE. But no word captures the realness and authenticity when we SACRIFICE for someone we love. In this episode, Keith Tay and I talk about toxic behaviors and the simple yet forgotten equation of giving and not taking!

"Hi, babe!" "sayaaaaang!" "LOVE!" Does it give you goosebumps when you hear couples call each other like this? I'm sure you've heard it before and or still doing it, which is fine! But some who have been dating for years might say, "wait till the honeymoon period is over, and you won't be this sweet anymore!" Do you agree? In this episode, Caroline and I shared our love language and why couples need to be intentionally sweet with one another!

We can't help to wonder; If there are so many BUTS for a relationship to start, will anyone be dating at all? We agree that it's crucial to find the right person, and please do not jump into a relationship right away cause we only live life once. But come on! She's a 10, but what if there's a better one out there? Or he's a ten, but he lives far away. Caroline and I had a conversation on the reality of many battling today, "the beauty and curse of choices"!

BOUNDARIES... Ugh!  Carrying a rebel personality, I find this word restrictive. I tried to find synonymous words to replace and bring comfort, but it still limits and confines!  But I learned over the years a borderless relationship invites chaos and confusion very quickly!  This episode was recorded live at SOUL! Caroline and I shared our troubles and stories of how to set a boundary, not as a label but by being intentional with our words, thoughts, and actions. 

Some might say, falling in love is the easy part! There is some truth in it. After a couple of months, you discover another side of each other! Some beautiful, some ugly, and some left you wondering why you dated that person in the first place! In this episode, Caroline and I shared how your culture and behavior could break or build your relationship.

I believe that building the future starts today! But I am also left confused and hurt when I hear someone elder say: "all you young people don't know what you're doing!" or "I've eaten more salt than you've eaten rice." I am certain that with the experience of the past and the knowledge of the now collaborate, beautiful things take place! In this episode, Andy Yeoh and I tackled the idea of honoring blindly, and what we should do as adults and youths together in building a sustainable healthy community!

Yes! mistakes have been made, and now you are left in this complex situation. Do I forgive? Can I hurt that person back? They are your best friend. How could they betray you like this? All of you are in the same community left confused and hurt! In this episode, Andy Yeoh was honest and raw about his journey as we talked about this sensitive topic. How do we move on? What happens when the blaming is over and what's next?

The frustration when you check your message, only to find out that person has "seen" the message or blue ticked you! Is this a new bad habit of the 21st century? We know a couple of relationships that have ended badly. In this episode, Caroline and I dive into the gray area of the current ethics of messaging and leaving others hanging, who's to blame and how to navigate them.

Remember when you would pick up the phone, call your friend and not feel bad about it? But today, it feels almost unethical not to message someone before you call. Has time changed? Are we overthinking? In this episode, Caroline and I dive into the gray area of the current ethics of messaging or calling inappropriately, who's to blame and how to navigate them.

We firmly believe that the people around you will define your success or failures! It is crucial to talk about the kind of relationships we intentionally curate to lessen our hard knocks and pull us out of bad breakups. In this episode, Keith Tay and I talk about the types of people we need and are we making it easy for people to love us.

Is there a secret potion I can acquire to be successful in life? Cause I would love to avoid failures! Is there a shortcut? If only life was that easy... What I've come to learn, is there are rituals we can commit ourselves to, and success will be around the corner! In this episode, it's so good to have Keith Tay back again, and we dove into a conversation about avoiding shortcuts and mastering our disciplines.

OH MY! WHY DO I FEEL THIS WAY? Is it disgusting or sinful to feel horny? That's what many would jump to conclusions about but never really converse about why humans have this complex feeling. In this episode, Caroline and I dive into a conversation about what triggers a person to feel so. With so many questions about this, what we decide to do next is significant!

Divorce is never fun, period! Especially when we witness a family fall apart. What can we do? Is there a way out of this pain? Will this happen to me in the future? In this episode, Caroline and I share the impact it will have on your mental and emotional health. With so many questions to answer, how we choose to respond is crucial to the healing process!

WHY WILL WHY! Yes, that was my thoughts when I saw what happened. How could Will Smith cross the line? Was there more than just a slap? Are there consequences that he will face? Ok, but Chris Rock was wrong, no? When it comes to a complex situation like this, I just had to get my buddy Bryan Chin into this conversation. In this episode, what we talk about is real and raw, purely our observations on what could have been better. Also, should Chris slap him back?

So you considered yourself a good person, never had any ill intention, especially to your partner. But during arguments, do you find yourself always wanting to win at all costs? Even sleeping on the couch or not talking to each other for a few days? In this episode, Caroline and I talk about our personal experience and identify some of the ways that might make your significant another feel like you're a bully.

So you have found someone to love, and now the next big step is to introduce them to your family. "Dad and mom, meet Daniel." *awkward silence* "I don't think the both of you shouldn't date." Caroline and I have heard so many heartbreaking stories like this, and it is sad to see so many unnecessary heartbreaks. In this episode, Caroline and I have a conversation on ways to handle this situation when your family says no to the person you date for unhealthy reasons.

"But we never had sex..." You come home from work or school and can't wait to talk or hang out, sharing in detail about all that has happened with intensity. It's been happening for a long while now. There are so many emotions involved that you've got to wonder if this is a relationship, only to find out: "Hey! we're more than friends, right?" "Um, no." So many have been left confused and hurt. In this episode, Caroline and I have a conversation about the reality of a friend with benefits, and yes, it's more than sex!

OH MY GOODNESS! Have you watched the series on Netflix yet? It is exciting and twisted! So many things wrong with it, but we realize; there are so many things to uncover and debunk from the infamous world of Joe Goldberg. Most of their actions in the series are questionable, but also many lessons to take away and build good lasting relationships. In this episode, Caroline and I talk about, "if only joe and love did this, things would be better." Also, how stalking should be done decently!

We just celebrated Deepavali, and it was so good to meet grandma again. "Thank you Jesus for murukus and mutton varuval!" As we're celebrating, we can't help but remember how some of our Indian friends still face discrimination. It also hurts that not too long ago, an incident happened over an inconsiderate Facebook post. In this episode, I got into a conversation with my brother and sister. We talked about what we can do to educate people around us and recognize that some things shouldn't be brushed off as a joke!

" Hi Pastor, can I date this girl?" Oh my! it is a weird conversation when someone asks this question, and they might add, "I've prayed, and God told me she's the one!" I love it when people involve God in their planning, but to have a mentality on dating like this: it's misguided! In this episode, Caroline and I talk about our pre-dating phase and the need for the right mindset when it comes to the big moment of seeking a relationship.

We have explored the understanding of each other's blind spots, and the knowledge of it is to build, not weapons to prove your point or future fights. So we talked about the importance of celebrating one another. But how do we do it? In this episode, Caroline and I share what we intentionally recognize and celebrate. Tears were involved, but they're good ones!

Have you got frustrated with your partner that it has driven you mad! Well, I do! Of course, I've driven my wife mad before, and I have to admit: I'm guilty! In this episode, Caroline and I candidly expose some of the frustrations we have towards one another and the lessons that come from it. We recognize for any relationship to work, we need to have crucial conversations to avoid unnecessary high emotion-filled fights that turn sour, and I end up sleeping on the couch.

It's a whole new world with your upgrade from a boyfriend/girlfriend status to husband/wife! There seem to be a whole new bunch of expectations and directions from our in-laws, and if not communicated, it will lead to a lifetime of struggle, hence the famous title: Monster-In-Law! But it doesn't have to be that way! You can have a healthy and happy relationship with your in-laws as you explore this episode with Caroline and me to hear our stories, experiences, and mindset!

"So... young man, what is your intention wanting to date my daughter?" Or, "Hi dear, why do you love my son?" These questions would be one of the scariest and but also most sacred ever. It comes with intimidating energy but also the protective nature and love of a parent. Yes, it is complex! But worry not, as we learn in this episode how to tackle and handle this part of the relationship. Caroline and I talk about our own experience and highlight some of the areas we have partnered up and overcome together!

The future is so hard to understand at times. We can be faith-driven, but the fear of losing out can get unbearable, in fact causing you the possibility of hating yourself and your partner. It was all for love. You sacrificed your career, part of your dreams, and maybe even the ideal life! Then as years go by, you ask yourself, is this all worth the sacrifice? In this episode, we had a conversation with Esther, our pastor. She is an honors student in the field of engineering. She could have pursued her dreams and make bucket loads of money! How could she give that up to build the church with her husband? In this episode, we dive into her mind and discover why that decision and the things that truly matter.