The Real Marriage Podcast

You may have been told before you had kids that once they come there is no going back.  It changes everything.  It's hard to know how true that is until it comes but if we aren't careful it can create difficult challenges for the marriage.  Griffin and Heather ran into this recently in what seemed like a random moment.  Heather felt like she needed more time and focus on the marriage and Griffin was surprised by the feeling.  How they reacted to the conversation was critical. Listen and hear this discussion about protecting your marriage and connection while going through the business of raising kids.  How can you prioritize each other? How do you make sure you have quality time so you don't miss important moments? 

Hormones!We all know that every month a woman is impacted physically, mentally and emotionally.  The question is how does that disrupt the marriage?It may or may not be an open and comfortable conversation in your home but if you aren't on the same page with this time of the month then you can open yourselves up to issues that develop over time.Listen and hear how Heather and Griffin have hit a breakthrough with not only understanding this dynamic better but making sure it doesn't negatively impact their intimacy and connection. 

A new year always produces reflective thoughts.  Where are we in life?  Where are we headed?  Are things where we want them to be?With how busy and overwhelming life is it can be tempting to just ask those questions but not have a true plan to move forward.  This episode is a discussion about why it is necessary to grow and move forward.  Why we must not get stagnant and just stay where we are.  We all have habits and reasons why we don't grow and progress whether it be individually or as a couple.  Listen to Griffin and Heather's passion around never wanting to settle in every aspect of life.  

Gratitude is a choice.Unfortunately it isn't always the natural one.  As we've discussed before it can be easy to live in a place of discontent and wanting rather than a place of gratefulness.  Listen and hear Heather and Griffin speak on the power of gratefulness.  You will hear them explore the significance of what your gratitude is anchored to and why it takes work to develop a natural heart of gratitude.  They also unpack how important it is to show your spouse and children what you are thankful for regularly.  

Making life-changing decisions always comes with trepidation.  This year Griffin and Heather made the big decision to homeschool all of their children.  After praying and seeking the Lord's guidance they made the move to alter their lives and maybe more significantly the lives of their children.This episode explores the challenges of making big decisions as a family.  How do you deal with second-guessing the decision? Is it a bad decision if it is hard? How important is it to be unified in these kinds of decisions as a couple?

It's hard not to be anxious or worried.When you open social media, check the news or even just go about your day you run into information that is unsettling.Politics, wars, daily news, hurricane destruction, etc. make it really hard to avoid being affected by so many challenging circumstances in the world. So, what's the balance between caring and being informed versus being overwhelmed by it all? How much time and energy should we put towards all of these things out of our control?It's not an easy answer but important to talk about because as you have noticed things don't seem to get better very often.Listen and hear Heather and Griffin talk about how they guard themselves after feeling the impact of being caught up in certain things in the past.  Hear how they help each other stay on track and focused on the things they can control. 

The demands on your life are strong.Do you often feel like you can't keep up? Like you are falling behind and missing things you should be keeping up with?One of the most common questions Griffin and Heather get is "How do you do it all?"  The true answer is that they don't feel like they do.  The feeling is often that we are not keeping up well enough.Listen and hear Heather specifically unpack how this challenge feels as a mother.  She speaks candidly about trying to meet the needs of the kids, keep up with the house, love Griffin well, etc.  

Words matter.You can think back to different times in your life where words made a significant impact on your life.  It could have been positive or negative but when people speak into your life it leaves a mark, especially when those words come from someone you care about.It's no different in marriage and parenting.  Your words to your spouse and kids are of extreme importance.  Choose them wisely!Listen and hear Griffin and Heather open up about the significance of their words in each other's lives.  You will hear how they have failed at this, learned from previous mistakes and how they approach this with their entire family.  

Everyone parents differently.  There is no easy or perfect template to parenting that creates the best case scenario with our kids.  One thing that is true, though, about parenting is that we are responsible for them.  Their growth, their character, their values, etc.  Increasingly, it is becoming harder to fight against the influences of our culture to have a strong voice in the lives of our kids.  We fight social media, other kid's influences, and the norms of the world and often times that clashes with what you value as a parent.In this episode, Heather and Griffin talk about these challenges and some of the decision they are making to gain more influence in the lives of their five kids.  They aren't telling you to do it their way but having a conversation on not only what they are doing but why they are doing it.  Hopefully it sparks great thoughts for you as a parent or a future parent.  

Dreams can be difficult.On the one hand we get excited about what could be and striving for more.  On the other hand not all of our dreams should be the focus of our attention.  How do you balance this in your marriage?Listen to an open conversation about a recent dream that was crushed in Heather's life and how it sparked a great conversation between Griffin and Heather.  You will hear them unpack the different way they approach dreams and how their faith plays a massive role in what they pursue.

While life seems to get busier by the day the distractions seem to come just as quickly.Whether it is aimlessly scrolling through social media, watching the random tv shows or however you fill the ever so small blank space you have in your day-to-day it never seems to help us move forward. In other words, our distractions can hold us back.  This episode is a conversation we try to always keep in front of us.  Are we spending our time on the right things?  Are we focused? Are we overwhelmed and overdoing our schedule?While we aren't perfect in this space and fall into the traps of not being as intentional with our time we know that we need rest and to prioritize putting our time into the things that matter most.  This episode will challenge you to do the same.  

You probably have many goals for the new year.  Getting healthy physically and maybe spiritually.  Goals for your kids and relationships.  What if sex and intimacy was a part of your goals this year?  When God created marriage He made it to where sex is a major component of strengthening and protecting a marriage.  It is a blessing that we get to take part in.However, as life goes on and we get busier and more overwhelmed by our responsibilities our intimacy in marriage can take a backseat.  And slowly, your start to grow a part and assumptions are made and bitterness and confusion can step it.Listen and hear Heather and Griffin openly talk about the significance sex and intimacy should play in your marriage.  They unpack the challenges you deal with as well as the reality of how it becomes less of a priority.  But in the end, the right approach in your marriage should make sex and intimacy better as you move forward.  

Somehow the year is already over.Another year down and 2024 is now to come.  One of the practices we try to do often is reflecting on where we have been and what we have been through.  For us, 2023 has been full of new challenges as well as circumstances to celebrate.  Listen and hear us unpack our takeaways from the year.  From challenges with kids and work, learning how to keep maturing and finding more ways to unify as a couple, we experienced plenty this past year.  There will be plenty that you resonate with.  

Do you ever feel like you and your spouse aren't on the same page?  Do you feel like you are headed in two different directions? Sometimes in our marriage one spouse can change as time goes on.  Your passions, your beliefs, your core values can grow as you do but your spouse doesn't come along with you.  This can be common for many marriages when life change happens like having kids, moving to a new area or changing jobs. It can be the reason couples decide to split up because thinking about a lifelong partnership with someone who isn't growing like you are can be daunting.  Listen and hear Heather and Griffin talk about the many challenges they have heard couples go through with this particular issue.  Also hear some encouragement on how to approach your spouse in a healthy way to spark healthy growth in them. 

Yes, it is a blessing!Last episode we unpacked the burden of parenting.  One thing we noticed was how easy it was to think about those ideas.  The blessings were a little more in depth to uncover.  And that is what makes the blessings so impactful.  The role and responsibility of a parent is so unique and so impactful, the blessing play out for decades.  Listen and hear Heather and Griffin speak about how they experience blessings now with young kids in the home but also look forward to the built-in lifelong blessing of relationships with their children for a lifetime.  

Parenting is forever.The word "burden" carries a negative connotation but the reality is that parenting is both beautiful and difficult.  At the very least the incredible responsibility of parenthood can feel like a burden in one way or another.  Because it is so constant and is a role you carry for so long it's worth understanding what the experience is truly like. Listen and hear Griffin and Heather share what parenting has felt like to them.  They discuss how they have experienced the weight of their role as mom and dad and what they have learned as they have partnered together to lead their five children for the last ten years.  

How can bitterness negatively impact your marriage?It's one of those things that starts small but if not dealt with it grows into something you can't control.  Each of us have frustrations towards our spouse for whatever reason but if we allow feelings to linger it will create issues down the road we won't want to face.Listen and hear Griffin and Heather unpack their experiences with bitterness both in and out of their marriage.  You will hear them discuss the communication tools that are essential to avoiding bitterness and how it gets harder to do once you have kids.  

You've probably heard this before: marriage is 50/50.But is it really?  When you step back and think about the different areas of your marriage and the specific roles you play it isn't always equal.  Sometimes it's 70/30 or even less.  Even the capacity we have in certain seasons to be "all-in" can vary and more often than not one of the spouses is carrying more than 50 percent of the weight at a given time.Listen and hear Griffin and Heather unpack how this plays out in their own lives.  They speak into work, parenting, dreams, money and more. 

It's another season change.Summer is usually a time where we try to fit in vacations, find some rest and get the kids into as many things as possible to keep them busy. But if we aren't careful we can easily overdo the schedule and leave the summer feeling more tired and burned out than ever.  So, what does a set apart summer look like?  Could it be an intentional time for your family?Listen and hear a conversation about a healthy approach to what the summer could be and why you may want to change it up this year.  

It almost sounds like an outdated word.What does modesty look like is 2023?  Is it even something worth focusing on?In part two of our "Set Apart" series we dive into this topic.  You will hear Griffin and Heather walk through their process of figuring out as a couple how they wanted to approach modesty.  And while it's easy to focus on the surface level ideas about what we wear and how we carry ourselves, listen and hear a conversation about what is beneath the surface with this topic. It's more about why we do what we do. 

The longer we are married the deeper our conversations get about who we want to become.  We talk a lot about our foundation, the growth areas of our lives and what we truly care the most about.For us, we want a marriage and a life that is set a part.  Free from what the world and culture is chasing, which by the way doesn't seem to work out for many people anyway, and driven towards what is most important.That is a life centered around fully pursuing Jesus and what the Lord designed us for.  What we have learned is that this is a life that is set apart.  It is challenging, it's fulfilling and it is a beautiful journey.Join us for the next few episodes as we dig into what a marriage set apart looks like.  

Whether it is at work, with kids and parents, your faith and any other relationship you can think of we all prefer values more than rules.  No one wants to be dictated to or forced to follow a rigid set of rules because their is no heart to that.Parameters and boundaries are helpful but they are more powerful when they are based around a set of values that establish those boundaries.  Listen and hear Heather and Griffin discuss how this impacts the culture of your family.  In marriage, parenting or faith we want to project and understand that value of how we function and how we operate.  Communicating values instead of rules to our children sets them up to know they why behind the what.  Hear how values are greater than rules in every aspect of life.  

There is a difference between being busy and being fruitful.  Life is jam-packed.  You've noticed that there aren't enough hours in the day and that you always have more to get done.  The tendency is to believe the lie that being busy is the best way to be.  That if you're busy you are moving forward and keeping up.  We live in an age of "hustle culture" telling you to spread yourself across as many things as possible to get ahead.  The truth is that the goal is to be fruitful not busy.  Listen and hear how we are learning to be careful not to overextend what we commit ourselves to and ensure that we are wise with what we are pouring ourselves into.  

Have you ever been told you are too emotional?What about hearing that you don't show enough emotion?  Most likely, your emotional makeup is different between you and your spouse.  One of you wears them on your sleeve while the other keeps them close to the vest and doesn't show much at all.This can be a sticking point for many relationships.  Not understanding, valuing and caring for each others emotions can do damage to your marriage.  It can keep you from growing and moving forward because this is foundational to a long-term relationship.Listen and hear Heather and Griffin talk openly about the challenges they have encountered throughout their marriage and even their lives based on how emotional they are or aren't.  You will also hear tips on how to navigate this ever present part of your connection with your spouse.  

Do you have clutter in your life? As the weeks and months fly by it becomes so easy to get busy and overwhelmed with everything.  We get farther away from what our goals were at the beginning of the year and things begin to pile up.  Business becomes a major challenge.  It's easy to start losing focus of the main things we should give our attention to.  Our marriage, kids, faith, etc.  It may be time for some spring cleaning in your life.  

The real reason we feel like we have a successful and growing marriage is because of God's involvement in our everyday lives.We talk often about how God has led us or shown us something.  So, can you really hear from God?  What does that exactly mean and can that happen for you?There are so many questions when it comes to faith but when it comes down to it, us hearing from God has been a game-changer.  Listen and hear how we have learned to be connected to our Heavenly Father in a way that allows us to hear from Him in our lives.  Hopefully it inspires you to pursue the same for your life and marriage.  

Last episode we tried to answer a common question people ask us.  How do you balance it all?The truth is that it is very difficult.  It's a constant conversation of where we are lacking and how we should adjust.  This week we touch on the different area of our life that each of us has had the toughest challenge with balance.  Heather speaks on the challenges of having to focus on the kids throughout most of our marriage and feeling like she isn't able to give Griffin enough.  And Griffin shares to difficulties of balancing work and family as he has adjusted to the demands of pursuing success with work while making sure to give the family the best he has to offer.

One of the most common questions people ask us is how do you balance it all? It's a great question and it's forced us to really think hard about how we approach all that we have going on in our lives.It certainly isn't easy and it was harder in the beginning.  For us, believe it or not, it has gotten somewhat easier the more we have added.  We have matured and learned so much along the way but the balancing act will always be a challenge for us.  In this episode we talk about our journey to learn how to handle all that we have.  We share some of the harder areas we each struggle with and some solid tips we have picked up along the way to get better and better about managing all that we have.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Fights and disagreements happen for various reasons.  Whether it is stress induced, miscommunication, using the wrong tone at the wrong time, etc. conflict is just a part of the marriage equation.  So, when your spouse lets you down or puts you in a difficult position how do you handle it?  Do you respond with love and patience or are you more prone to being frustrated, annoyed or bitter towards them?In this episode Heather and Griffin get real about a recent conflict they had with each other.  You will hear how Griffin put Heather in a really tough spot and they unpack the decision Heather had to make to either humbly make the situation better or respond in a way that would put gas on the flames.Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

It's been nine months since our last episode and so much has happened with the Gilstrap in that time.Covid, new home, new job, new school for the kids and a new baby is just the beginning of our last nine months.  We share it all in our first episode of season six along with the challenges we have faced as a couple and as a family throughout the process.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

In this episode Griffin and Heather give an update on their move to North Carolina and what that means for the future of The Real Marriage Podcast.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

How do you know it's God's voice?We received this awesome question last week and got really excited to talk about it.  Of course, we are Christians and are seeking to grow in our faith every single day.  That journey has led to daily wanting to be led by the Lord in our thoughts, decisions and way we live our lives.For us, with so much responsibility as spouses, parents and leaders we do not want to do it on our own.  Everyone is looking to someone or something for guidance and direction in this life to lead us to the type of success we are looking for.  Unfortunately, many voices and directions don't work.  For us, it has to be the Lord.In this episode Griffin and Heather discuss what it even means to hear from the Lord.  They talk about how God speaks to them differently and how they practically approach trying to hear from God daily.Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Your greatest strength is your greatest weakness.At first glance it keep seem a bit odd.  But the more you think about personalities it makes total sense.  Your strength in one area of your life is great but can create a weakness in other areas.  Maybe you are very driven which allows you to thrive at work but it causes you to give less to your family.  Or, you are extremely creative which produces amazing things but on the flip side it means you struggle to stick to one thing at a time.  The list goes on.This can be felt in marriage in a major way.  Our strengths can often create blind spots.  We believe that a strength in one area of our lives is a strength in every area.  However, our spouses can see it from all angles.In this episode you will hear Griffin and Heather talk about specific ways they have handled this in their own marriage.  You will hear them be very honest about some of their own blindspots and how they have embraced the fact that their strengths can also come across as a weakness to each other.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Stress can come unannounced.Life seems to pile up the challenges quickly.  Circumstances can change in an instant and so many things can happen that you just aren't ready for.  Griffin and Heather have walked into a season just like this.  And even though what they are walking into are all good things  the stress has come very fast.  In this episode Griffin and Heather talk about how they are trying to approach the upcoming stressful season.  With a fifth child on the way and moving the whole family to a new state for a brand new job it is critical to approach it well.You will hear the different ways Griffin and Heather approach their stress and also what they do together as a couple to be proactive.  They touch on the significance of their faith in these seasons and how that helps keep them in the right mindset to take it all on in the healthiest way possible.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Ten years of marriage.The old cliche is definitely true, time flies when you are having fun!  It feels like yesterday that Heather was hitting on Griffin on the first day of our freshman year at Stetson University.  And here we are with four kids and one on the way about to move our whole lives to a new state!  It's been a great ride.As we reflected on our first ten years of marriage we realized that we have learned so many key lessons in these critical years together.  Some of it we have shared on the podcast before and some of it we haven't.  Our goal is to share these lessons  in hopes that it can be a blessing to your marriage. Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Life is full of surprises!We didn't anticipate taking a break this early in the year but so much has happened in March for our family.  As overwhelming as our two announcements are we feel incredibly blessed and excited about what God is doing in our lives.Take a listen and hear some big updates from the Gilstrap family!Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Who should be leading your marriage?Should anyone lead a marriage?  Isn't it supposed to be an equal partnership with mutual share of the decision making?Honestly, it can get complicated quickly.  Many of us grew up and saw different things.  Maybe you were in a single-parent home where a mom had to really step up and take care of a lot of things on their own.  Maybe it was more traditional in the sense that the father felt like he needed to be in control and the decision maker of the house.  Many families have one spouse that has a type A personality which can make the other spouse much more quiet and in the background.  Of course, some families have it where the wife is far more dominant in the relationship and the man is quiet, subdued and passive.You can see many variables can be had but what is the right way to go about it?In this episode we talk through the different ways both spouses can take a leadership role in the family.  We discuss the ways it can become a give and take and learning how to get to a place where you can identify what strengths each of you brings to the table where you can allow them to lead in those areas.Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Should your marriage make you happy?It seems like an obvious answer.  I mean, we didn't get married to feel unhappy with someone for the next 50 years.  We want it to be fun and positive.  We want to enjoy marriage.But what do we do when our spouse doesn't make us happy?  How should we feel when they frustrate us or disappoint us?  As much as we want to feel happy with each other all of the time we can't avoid feeling challenged, upset and sometimes even angry with them.Maybe marriage is meant to create deeper feelings than happiness.  Maybe there is far more to gain from this journey.Listen and hear Griffin and Heather share how marriage has made them feel far more than happiness.  You will hear how expecting happiness can be difficult in marriage and why that should really be a secondary goal because there are much stronger feelings to experience through your marriage that will be a much greater blessing.Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

"Rut" - A habit or pattern of behavior that has become dull and unproductive but is hard to change.Yep, we've all been there.  Whether it's your job, your schedule, your marriage or even your parenting we've all been in a rut.  Our excitement has waned and our enthusiasm for life in general has tumbled as a result.  Although these seasons of life are common they are also potentially dangerous.  When one spouse or both are going through a season like this it can spill over into the marriage quickly.  And let's face it, we bring things home with us.  Our spouse can easily become the outlet of our negative feelings and emotions.  So, how do we handle these "ruts" in the right way?Listen and hear Heather and Griffin talk candidly about their very real struggles in this area.  You will hear them open up about the challenges they have faced over the past ten years and how they have learned to not only notice when their spouse is in a rut but also how to approach them in a way that helps them get out of it.Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Waiting is hard.Many of us have had to wait to get married, to have kids, to get that promotion or to walk into our dreams.Waiting is a consistent part of our journey and it's something we want to thrive in.  The challenge is learning to wait well and to not allow the waiting to be wasted.  Because the reality is that the seasons of your life where you are waiting can either be a catalyst for growth or a reason for struggle.  Listen and hear Griffin and Heather share the difficult areas of their life and marriage where they have had a season of waiting.  You will hear in depth about the hardest times in each of their lives where they have had to wait on something significant.  And discover three key ways you and your spouse can learn to wait well.Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Most people don't like change.  The anxiety of it.  The unknowns you have to face.  Change is hard for individuals and it can create unexpected stress for your marriage.  However, we all understand that change is inevitable. Whether it is having kids for the first time, moving to a new state, changing jobs or a change to your life that you didn't even ask for we all face transitions.  The question is how well do we handle the change that comes our way?Listen and hear Heather and Griffin have an honest discussion about the hardest changes they have faced since getting married.  You will hear about the challenges of parenthood, adulthood and dealing with the weight of responsibility that they weren't ready for.  And hear the biggest mistake they made early on when facing their big life transitions.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

How can you make sure you don't lose yourself in your marriage? It's a good question with a complicated answer.  God created marriage for two people to become one.  It's a lifelong journey of merging two lives together to make something amazing. It takes compromise and sacrifice of yourself to do it well.But, on the other hand, there is something special about each individual.  And if we aren't careful we can lose those special pieces of the puzzle and regret it years from now.  This really is a challenge that can be so subtle for years and become a major challenge before you know it.  Listen and hear three ways Griffin and Heather have learned how to protect their individuality in their marriage.  You will hear how challenging this can be with children and why spending time away from each other can sometimes be the best thing to do.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

“It's not how you start, it's how you finish.”Maybe you have heard that quote before from a coach or a parent sometime in your life.  It makes sense.  It's all about the finish.  But let's be honest, a good start gets you to the finish you want much quicker.  Most people are elated that 2020 is over and 2021 has begun.  It's like a fresh start that we all needed.  We want new, different and better this year.  So let's do it!Of course, it's easier said than done.  It takes intentionality to get started the right way.We thought we would kick off this season talking about how we are starting.  Some things we always do and some things we knew we just simply needed to do this year because of the world we currently live in.  Listen and hear the four specific things Heather and Griffin are doing to start 2021 right and how Heather's Amazon purchases are already causing Griffin stress! Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

You can't wait for this year to end.  We get it!It's been a year unlike any other.  We have all been challenged in ways we never expected and are hoping that a fresh new year will provide something better.But, before you get ahead of yourself, have you considered how important these next 31 days are?  Think about it.  2021 will not magically create an easier life for us.  You know you will face challenges there as well.  Whatever you are hoping to see happen next year you will play a major role and creating that success.  So, before we write off this year and try to move on maybe we should make the most of what we have left of it.  And what if the way you approach December could be the reason your 2021 heads in the direction you really hope it will?  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Nothing gets you into the holiday spirit more than some family drama.Let's face it.  We all deal with some kind of tension when it comes to our families.  It could be a broken relationship, some challenging in-laws or even something one person said years ago that still lingers in the back of your mind.  And for whatever reason family drama can be the worst kind.  As much as you try to get over it and learn how to deal with it the feelings can still exist.  So what do we do?  And even if we can't change the people we will be around what are some ways to approach this in a healthy way?With the holiday season upon us we need to talk about how to manage these tensions.  Listen and hear Griffin and Heather talk about their own challenges with family.  You will hear some encouragement for how to approach this well as a married couple.  You will also hear which holiday is their least favorite and Heather's will surprise you!Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Purpose – the reason for which something is done or created.  The reason for which something exists.Everyone wants to know their purpose.  We want to understand why we exist and how we bring value to this world.Whether it be through work, parenting, our marriage or how we serve people we strive to know and feel like we are valuable.   We have to know that our life has meaning.In this episode you will hear Heather and Griffin share openly about their journey to find their purpose and how that has impacted their marriage.  You will hear why it was much easier for Griffin than it was for Heather and how you can help your spouse find their purpose.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

When things are going wrong we all cling to something.  How is this season going for you?  The pandemic is continuing to linger, the election has been predictably stressful and life in general seems to be confusing and at times, overwhelming.  Of course, most of this is out of our control and we can't do a whole lot to change it.  So, what do we do?  In this episode you will hear Griffin and Heather discuss openly how critical their faith is for them in this season.  You will hear when their faith became real to each of them and why it is helping each of them and their marriage in such a chaotic time of life for all of us.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

How intimate is your marriage?Intimacy is key to every marriage.  The basic definition of intimacy is "closeness."  Many have broken this idea into four categories: spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically.While we all strive to be more intimately connected to our spouse we have to understand that there are subtle ways to kill intimacy in your marriage.  This episode brings light to different intimacy killers and what you can do to avoid them as a couple.Listen and hear Heather and Griffin share honestly about which area of intimacy they struggle with the most.  You will also hear why having sex often doesn't necessarily mean you are intimately connected to your spouse.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com. 

How does money impact your marriage?Research has found that money issues are one of the top five reasons for divorce.  And one study found that finances are one of the top two issues couples fight about.  Most likely, money has become an issue in your relationship for one reason or another.  So, knowing that, how can we approach money in a way that doesn't ruin our marriages?  Listen and hear Griffin and Heather walk through four specific areas where they will not allow money to hurt their marriage.  You will hear about the hardest lessons they had to figure out and how money became their biggest tension point early in their marriage.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

What comes to your mind when you hear the word forgiveness? Most of us think of a time when someone hurt us.  They said something or did something that left a mark.  Maybe it was a family member, your spouse or even a decision you made yourself that created a reason to bring unforgiveness into your life.Forgiveness is hard but it is essential.  It's essential because choosing not to forgive will always end up harming yourself.  Listen and hear Heather and Griffin share openly about the challenges of forgiveness.  You will hear practical advice on how to forgive yourself, your spouse and other people in your life.  You will also hear ways they work together as a couple to find forgiveness in challenging circumstances.  Make sure to listen all the way to the end to hear a step by step process on how to find forgiveness towards someone.  Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.

Can two people really fall out of love?It's a really good question.  No one gets married and doesn't think they are in love.  No one really believes five or ten years down the road it isn't going to work out and you will be looking to start over fresh away from your spouse.However, it is something you hear about.  “We aren't in love anymore.”  “We have just grown apart.”  “It's just better to go our separate ways.”So, what does that actually mean?  And if this is something that could happen to us, how can we avoid it?Listen and hear Griffin and Heather talk about how people can drift apart over time.  You will hear how they see love differently than a lot of people and ways you can avoid falling out of love.Thank you for taking this journey with us!  We hope to strengthen your marriage one conversation at a time.  And don't forget to check out more resources at RealMarriagePodcast.com.