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Are you having a hard time overcoming hard times in your life? Times can be hard and unbelievable situations can happen making life unbearable. Fortunately, there are strategies you can us to overcome difficulties and hard times and succeed.   Our guest today is J'Anmetra (Jojo) Waddell. She is an award winning transformational coach, two times best-selling author and seasoned entrepreneur with over 20 years of experience. Jojo is an advocate for domestic violence survivors and victims.   Additionally, she is the founder of Bare Your Hair and Wanddel Consulting Services. She is the only Live Past the Crazy specialist, and she has come on today to talk about the five keys to living past the crazy.     Episode Spotlights   Why Jojo Created the Five Keys to Living Past the Crazy.   She knew crazy first-hand and she hated when people gave her generic answers, “Oh, Jesus will fix it. It's going to be okay. Pray about it.”   She needed somebody to say, “Jojo, today this is what you do. And tomorrow, this is what you do.” She needed steps of how to stop what was going on.   How Jojo Created the Five Keys to Living Past Crazy   After the crazy in her life had stopped, these were things she was consistently doing all the time to keep the crazy at a minimum.   Crazy can be defined many ways. Her crazy was an abusive husband.   The crazy might never to go away, but she can handle it a lot better with the five steps.   What Changed When She Started Implementing Her Five Keys.   She became more clear   It helped to get some of the ideas and thoughts out of head onto paper   They keep her calm, centered, and keeps the crazy away.   She started to value her mental space and her mental quiet time   The Five Keys to Living Past the Crazy   Develop a personal mantra   Write a journal   Develop a daily goal   Start each day new   Find a purpose partner   How to Start Using the Five Keys   Be committed, not interested   Start daily a writing routine   Talk to yourself positively every day   Value your quiet time   Find people who are going to genuinely support you   Resources/Links Mentioned in This Episode J'Anmetra Jojo Waddell’s books on Amazon Contact Jojo:    Website: Be Fearless    YouTube Channel: Fearless Morning Show    Facebook page: Fearless Morning Show.    Instagram: @JanWaddell    Twitter: Janmetra    Email: elizabeth@livepastcrazy.com janmetra@livepastcrazy.com   Check out JoJo's Freebies right here:   Daily Mantra Reading List 5 Keys to Living Past the Crazy   How to work with JoJo  Retreats: Girlfriends Retreat  August 23-25th - Clearwater - Florida  PROGRAMS/SPECIALS 1:1 Coaching (4 weeks ) Meet once a week $97.00 normally $397 open for 20 people. Topics for each week 1. Mindset 2. Foundations Matter 3. New Rules to New You 4. Strengthen your voice by speaking your truth    Live Past Crazy Blueprint- $49.99 Ways to Subscribe to Rich in Differences Podcast: Itunes Stitcher Google Play Spotify   **Rich in Differences Podcast is not intended to diagnose, prescribe, treat, or cure any disease, physical or mental. Any advice given on the Rich in Differences Podcast should not be construed as a prescription, a promise of benefits, claims of cures, or a guarantee of results to be achieved. The information, instruction or advice given by Rich in Differences Podcast is not intended to be a substitute for competent professional medical or psychological diagnosis and care. You should not discontinue or modify any medication presently being taken pursuant to medical advice without obtaining approval from your healthcare professional. As a listener/reader, you must take complete responsibility for your own physical health and emotional well-being.   TRANSCIPT BELOW   Interview with Janmetra Waddell 
00:00 (Intro Music Playing) 00:04 Brooke: Welcome to Rich Indifferences with your host, Brooke, where we discover what works for you in life, health and business. We are not legos and one size does not fit all so grab a good drink and come listen to different perspectives as we see what sticks for you. 00:21  Welcome to Rich Indifferences and today we have guest speaker, Janmetra Waddell or AKA JoJo. Janmetra is an award-winning transformational coach, two times bestselling author and seasoned entrepreneur with over 20 years of experience. She is the only 'live past the crazy' specialist and she has come on today to talk about 5 Keys To Living Past The Crazy.  Welcome, Jojo, and thank you for coming on. 00:47 JoJo: Hey, Brooke, thank you so much for having me. I am excited to be here.  00:53 Brooke: Me too. I cannot wait to hear what you have to say about this because I believe we all definitely live the crazy life, for sure. So JoJo, what is your drink of choice today?  01:04 JoJo: My drink of choice today would be a strawberry margarita with the mango swirl in the center. 01:12 Brooke: Mmm. That sounds good. 01:14 JoJo:  I didn't start drinking till I was 35 and then I discovered those. 01:17 Brooke: They're great. Wow! I am just drinking straight-up sweet tea, which sounds really lame compared to yours. Oh, 35? 01:33 JoJo: Yeah, and then I was watering down my wine so I would put cranberry juice in my wine.  01:41 Brooke:  That's an interesting way of doing it. 01:43 JoJo: Yeah.   01:45 Brooke: All right. So let's start at the beginning of your story. What made you create the 5 Keys to Living Past the Crazy? 01:56 JoJo: The reason why I started was because I knew crazy firsthand and I hate it when people gave me generic answers: "Oh, Jesus will fix it. It's going to be okay, pray about it." I didn't need that. I needed somebody to say, "Jo Jo, today, this is what you do. And tomorrow this is what you do." And I needed steps and I didn't need generic jargon and people to talk to me. I needed somebody to show me the steps of how to stop what was going on.  02:30 Brooke: I completely understand and I have had similar experiences where all I wanted was an actual step to take and not an idea and that, yeah, that makes all the difference in the world.  02:43 JoJo: Hmhm. 02:44 Brooke: So, did someone come and teach you this or did you create out of like, did you just take from your own experience and say, "This is what I'm going to start doing to help myself" and then create the 5 keys or like, how did all that come about? 02:58 JoJo: For me, these were things that after the crazy in my life had stopped, these were things I finally started to take notice of that I was consistently doing all the time to stop. And crazy can be defined anyway --- your crazy doesn't have to be my crazy. Mine was an abusive husband. And so your crazy could be the kids, the husband, the job, the commute; it could be whatever. But I realized it was the same things that I was doing over and over and over again that help keep me on track and keep the crazy at a minimum. I don't think it's ever going to go away but I can handle it a lot better with my 5 steps.  03:42 Brooke: So what changed when you started implementing your 5 Keys? 03:48 JoJo: Some of the things that change for me, I became more clear because when you're in crazy, the first thing that you don't ever do is grieve. You never grieve so then you can't think straight so you're always in straight panic mode. So that it helped me to get some of my ideas and thoughts out of my head onto paper. So I was able to think clearer, I was able to slow down the crazy and then realized, was I willingly participating in crazy? Like sometimes, you know you're going to talk to that one person that makes you want to cuss in 2.5 seconds but yet, you talk to them. So, was I willingly participated in crazy? So I had to think about that and then I started to value my mental space and my mental quiet time.  I became and I still am very protective, on Sundays, I will bite your head off if you interrupt my quiet time or my mental health time and it has just become things that has, you know, they keep me calm, they keep me centered and keeps the crazy at bay.  04:50 Brooke: Thank you. So let's talk about the 5 Keys. 04:53 JoJo: Yes. 
04:53 Brooke: What are your ‘5 keys to living past the crazy’? 
04:57 JoJo: Well, the first key is for me. Is I had to develop a personal mantra. Like I had because my abuser called me all these crazy names and I wouldn't look in a mirror for like a year, almost two years, I never looked in the mirror. And so I had to develop my own mantra. So it is now on my bathroom mirror in his words as quotes that I have that I say, when I'm having those really bad days, I have a basic one that says "I look good. I feel good. I am good." And I'm going to say that until I'm ready for it. So the first one is just developing my personal mantra. That's for me. The second one is, I journal. I write down everything that I think I'm feeling. So then I can ---because I like to check myself before anybody else brings anything to me: "JoJo, get yourself under control first." So when I'm journaling it, I can put all that down and see maybe where I went wrong or are my feelings really in or did somebody really hurt me.   And the third one is, 'develop a daily goal'. It doesn't matter how big or small. When I had postpartum depression if I brushed my teeth that day, I was excited, "Hey, Jojo, you brushed your teeth today" and I celebrate all of it and I just took it for what it was. I wasn't trying to be anything great.  And then I had to start each day new. I could not hold on to the fact that I stayed in bed and cried all day yesterday. That was yesterday; I deserve to sit in the bed and cry all day. Today is a whole new day. I get to do something different and then I would just get excited about that.  And then the fifth one was, I called them 'Purpose Partners' now, but in the beginning, I just called it my support system because my family was 400 miles away.So that meant I had to find friends to become my support system. And so now I call them 'Purpose Partners' and that's just people who I can call and say, "I'm having this crazy thought or this bad day." And they don't hesitate to pick me back up, instead of giving me their mantra or their dissertation of what they think and I don't have to worry about that. 07:14 Brooke:  Awesome. Thank you. How would you teach someone to start using the 5 Keys?  07:20 JoJo: The first thing I would do is ask them if they're interested, they're committed. I think that question is so important and I learned this the hard way if you're interested ---and I always talk about myself first, third and past tense, all versions I talk about myself. So I'll say, "JoJo, if you're interested then every excuse you have is valid." Meaning: I'm tired. I'm sleepy. The kids got on my nerves. My husband aggravated me. I hated the commute.  So if I'm interested, every excuse I have is going to stop me but if I'm committed to living past crazy, there's no excuse that's going to stop me. It doesn't matter that I don't like the children, I don't like the husband, I don't like the cat, the dog, I don't like anybody, doesn't matter; I'm committed to living past crazy. So the first thing would definitely be to make sure that they had been committed and not just interested because that's important because if not your style.  And then, of course, the daily journaling; talk to yourself. We talked to ourselves all the time. And I think people are afraid to say like I have a full-blown conversation with me, myself and I, every day on the way to work. I talk to myself, "JoJo, girl, I can't believe you're doing it."  "I know."   But when you do that you find the answers there and then I value that there won't be the value of quiet time. We always say we don't know the answer, I can't figure it out. Well, if you think about your morning; you wake up, you turn on the TV and you're listening to the news. You're yelling at the kids, you get in the car. You drop the kids off, you sit in traffic, you yell at people, you listen to the radio, you talk to your mama, you get to work and you're talking to people. You get back in the car, it's the radio, somebody's calling with something urgent on the way home. You got to stop at the store and then you get in. You got to yell to get the kids in the bed, get them to sleep. Cook food and do all the mommy things and then heaven forbid if you got a husband, you got wife things where you ain't even wash clothes.  You haven't done any of that and then it's 11 o'clock and you're in the bed and you're watching the nightly news and then you're like, "Okay, let me think about myself." and that's the last thought you have before you wake up in the morning. And so, that quiet time just allows you to be quiet so that you can hear the answer because the answer we're looking for is there but we're so busy blocking it out, we can't hear the answer. So definitely the quiet time.  And then the last would be those 'Purpose Partners'. Finding people who are genuinely going to support you, who are there for you and that everything that you're asking for, you're willing to give back. Like if I'm going to be this great friend to you and support system, I want it back as well. So just be willing to give what you're asking for.  10:04 Brooke: I love listening to you talk because I think it's so funny like the talking to yourself. So like when I got a divorce, I started seeing a therapist. Something she had me do, and she still will, is if I'm having like something, like there's a disconnect in me, like two sides are warring, she'll make me have a conversation with myself. She's like, "Speak to this side."  And then, "What is this sides response to that?"  And so, what I've learned is it makes you respect all sides, instead of trying to get rid of it because it's not going away, it's part of you.  10:37 JoJo: Yeah. It's a part of me. Like I've learned to love all parts of Jojo. Like I love all of me. There's the crazy side, the nerd, the funny, the part that thinks I can sing in a rock band, even though I can't sing it all. I love all parts of me. 10:55 Brooke: Yes. I call it 'the committee of Brooke' now. Like it's a real committee now, you know. But if you don't have someone who's ever done that, they look at you like you were crazy. Like, you what? 11:06 JoJo: They really do. Like you really can't, I was like, yeah. Me and myself, we have great conversations all the time  11:13 Brooke: Exactly. All right, JoJo, so how can people work with you these days?  11:19 JoJo: If you want to find me, of course, I'm on all social media and I know my name is so difficult to remember but if you type in 'Live Past Crazy Specialist', I promise, I'm the only one and I'm going to pop up. The website is livepastcrazy.com. But if they want to work with me, they can go to bit.ly/waddellspeaks. And then that's just a short conversation piece that we can have or talk about. Because sometimes I'm a firm believer, people don't want an answer. I mean, they don't want you to give feedback. Sometimes they just want to answer and they just need a safe place to come and vent. They don't need you to give a dissertation. I just need to share my thoughts and with me sharing my thoughts, I figured it out all by myself. I just needed a safe place for somebody to come to listen.  And so a lot of times, as my youngest daughter says, "You're a space giver." So I'm a space giver. I allow you that safe place just to come and talk and I cannot talk, it's totally up to you, how you want it to go. But just so you can share your thoughts and feelings and then we can decide how we're going to go from there. 12:29 Brooke: Excellent. So where can people find you these days?  12:33 JoJo: They can find me on all social media; Facebook. I am Janmetra JoJo Waddell. We also have a YouTube channel with over 410 shows. So you can binge-watch all the Fearless Morning Shows. So if you type simply type in 'Fearless Morning Show." And then, of course, we had the Facebook page, Fearless Morning Show, Be Fearless Incorporated Show, a group on Facebook. And then, of course, the website is livepastcrazy.com  And I think that's everywhere. Of course, all social media; Twitter, Instagram is just my name. 13:05 Brooke: All right then, excellent. That's a lot of good places for people to find you and the fact that you have so many episodes, that's a great way for people like you said to binge-watch and really get to know you and your style. 13:17 JoJo: And they could pick a topic. I have the topics there so you can pick whatever you want to listen to.  13:22 Brooke: Excellent. Thank you. Thank you so much for coming on the show. It was a blast talking with you Jo-Jo.  13:28 JoJo: Thank you so much for having me and I don't know why I sing endings of everything but I sing them. Thank you for having me. I had a great time and I think it's because I can't sing that I habitually try to sing all the time. So thank you so much for having me on the show. I have truly enjoyed sharing the 5 Steps To Live Past Crazy with you guys.  13:52 Brooke: All right, Pop-Tarts.That's all for this week. Remember: send in your thoughts, your feedback, your ideas, your questions, and your drink of choice; whether it be alcoholic or non-alcoholic and be sure to send in the recipes so you can be featured on the show. And don't forget subscribe, so you can be around for when I feature you on the show and to get some good content. Here's to another week. Cheers.

Hi everyone! This is Connie Sokol, and you're listening to Balance Redefined Radio. I've spent over 20 years teaching people how to redefine what balance really is, meaning a more purposeful and joyful life.   They’ve paid off credit cards, lost weight, organize their homes, and created a meaningful life plan and they've managed their time, changed habits and experience greater success both at work and at home.   So now I decided to take the plunge and help about 100,000 new people who want to redefine balance in their lives. People ask me all the time, “How do I go from an overwhelming and chaotic life to more purpose and organization and joy?”   That's the reason why I'm doing this podcast, to give you trusted answers and create a space where you could find balance. My name is Connie Sokol and welcome to Balance Redefined Radio…   Welcome back! I'm so glad you've returned for more and more good stuff more principles and practices that are going to bless your life, give you purpose, organization and joy and that's what we're after for that balance redefined.   So today I am talking about the balance between sit and start…   Do you find yourself in that limbo in between those two choices, that switch point of your life? Do I sit or do I start?   You know, a few weeks ago it really occurred to me that it came to me in those two words.   Life really is about these balances of when do I sit and when do I start?...Because our personalities will lend itself that we tend to do more of one than the other.   So I have friends that are more. They sit, not that they actually sit (their moms), they're on the go, so it's not that, but emotionally they'll sit with something before they actually will do something about it and it's a blessing and a curse because sometimes that will make them sort of process a process and process them more and they're actually spinning. Their wheels are really not moving forward…   Other people I know, including myself, are more prone to start. Start without really thinking through all the way. Jump in and say, “Hey, like you know, Judy Garland, Mickey Rooney, let's put on a show and it should just post everything, show up like a half hour sitcom should all just come together and there are pros and cons to both for sure.”   I have been able to accomplish a lot by just starting because if I would have known so many of the things I would have come up against, I would never have started.   However, it can also have its hidden costs as both sides do and so I have had to learn over the years still learning how to temper that start and be able to know when I need to sit and when I need to start and that's where this podcast came from, is this. I had all these thoughts about this and that. As I'm talking with people, they're struggling with that same thing. Only they just didn't have those words to it. So I'm putting some words to it...   So today, how do we balance when to know when to sit and when to start. So one of the things that I want to kind of get you in that groove about is to start recognizing when your not doing the thing, the which one you should be doing.   So usually we're going along and we're probably choosing it pretty wisely. But then we started noticing some symptoms if we're wise, we start noticing that we're getting resentful and maybe angry little snippy triggered and maybe we're feeling super tired, like just kind of fatigued, tired. Not like, “Wow, I just did racquetball for an hour and a half.” I'm tired, more of, “I feel worn out.”I just feel just tired, like fatigue, that kind that you just go, I sleep and I don't really feel rested. That kind of tired. So we got the resentful, we got the frustrated, we got the angry, you've got the tired, don't have to have all of these, but you have some of these and you're feeling kind of angsty, like it just kind of rumbles in your soul.   Those can often be signs for you to step back and say, do we need to do it differently? Maybe you've been running pellet mill for the last several weeks or months and just go, go, go for whatever needed to be done, and maybe now your body and soul is telling you it's time to switch.   You don't have to stay in this split in the space. You don't have to stay here. You can do it differently and allowing yourself that transition to go into a calmer place or a slower pace...That's something that you can watch for. Or if you're having this rumbling and you've been binge watching Netflix for the last six months, maybe it's saying to you, you know what, girl? It's time for you to get up and go, you know what, dude? It's time for you to move. It's time for you to get off the emotional couch and make something happen. So whichever way it is, just kind of pay attention.   What are some of the feelings you're having lately? Are you noticing any of those kinds of symptoms or triggers or any kind of feelings that are giving you a little call to action that's really your soul communicating with you.   I feel that's kind of either making space for that or it's calling to you or it's saying you're not going to want to stay in this space. You're not going to want to stay here. You want to move forward in some way or do it differently. So just think for a minute what you might be feeling if you're feeling any of those things or if you're feeling like, yeah, I think I need to do it differently. Now, having asked yourself that, which way are you tending to do it right now, are you more sitting with something and kind of avoidance maybe about doing something about it? Are you in that space or you and the I'm a Gogo?   That's really good for you to identify because then you'll know maybe what gear you need to switch to. So if you're really in gear fifth gear and you're like, all right, I'm going, I'm going to go, and then maybe you need to pull it back to second, maybe even first, and if you're in first and second, you just got to gear up, go to third to fourth, and let's get this place moving, right? Let's get go. Let's get going. So think about where you're at and then think about the next phase that you want to be doing. The next phase you want to go to. Just be thinking about what that looks like for you. Have you got that? Have you thought through that? Just for a minute? If it's that you want to, you think you need to pull it back and you need to sit for a bit.   Let's talk about that for a second...   We have got to as a society start to really value sitting, meaning that space, that calmness, that stillness, value that as much as productivity, it's two sides of the same coin. You're going to hear me say that all the time, two sides of the same digestive biscuit, and if you're not sure what that is from other podcasts, I'm from Scotland, digestive biscuit. Anybody out there, right? Boom, there are beautiful fiber, kind of good cookie on the one side and then this yummy melted chocolate on the other side so you get the good for you stuff and you get the good tasting stuff and together it is magic. Oh, makes me want one right now. Anyway, “#biscuit” if you are on and down. Okay?   Anyway, so we're going to talk about sitting and sitting with ourselves, with our feelings, with our what we need to do because we need to create a space for what's coming next and it's very kind of way, but I want you to consider that because lots of things happen in stillness.   In fact, I love that quote that says, “Silence isn’t empty. It's full of answers.” Isn't that true?   Silence is not empty. It's full of answers. When we get quiet, can you feel that? It makes a space for thoughts and feelings and things to fill it that usually gets shoved to the side. Now sometimes we avoid that stillness because there's things that come up that are really difficult or hard or feelings that are really painful and that's when we're reaching for, you know, the brownies or whatever it is that you're reaching for and I hope that you will allow yourself to take it in small steps.   If things come up that are difficult or feelings that are are hard for you to feel...   Then take it in small doses. I like having stillness and you know me, I'm a writer so I have to have a little legal pad next to me and a pen. I got to have something. Maybe it's a post it note and just to keep out whatever it is. I've got to have something because I know that when I lay still all kinds of thoughts surface. Some of them are just innocuous. I need to go get, you know, these protein bars when I go to the grocery store, but others have just been waiting for me to give a space for them to come forth. The other day I did this and I kid you not. I thought, “I wonder if I have any thoughts that need to come up right now.” I laid down for just a few minutes and I had seven pages of notes, seven pages that is gold that I did not know was just bubbling over waiting for me to take the cap off. Right? And just let it out.   So silence, stillness, sitting with your emotional, mental, spiritual self is so key. So if you've been a Gogo, pounding, pounding, start carving out time for stillness. So maybe it's one minute, maybe it's three minutes, maybe it's five minutes. It doesn't have to be a great deal because once you start doing it, you'll be shocked at how fast the time goes and it how much your body yearns for it.   It's dehydrated in a sense for this stillness, for this quietness, the sitting with yourself...So start for just a few minutes a day. In fact, I think it was Michael Hyatt said that he got that tip from an author that said that to start on the path to joy, I'm paraphrasing, but if to start on the path to joy, start by doing 15 minutes of nothing a day. That's where it all begins.   Fifteen minutes of nothing, a day, and you know that is such truth because when you start with nothing for 15 minutes, then I'll promise you where you're next is gratitude or meditation because that's where your thoughts yearn to go. They yearn to have something positive to come into your soul. They want to clean out and they want to bring good stuff in.   That's what they want. That's what your soul's want...   So consider that how you can carve out one, three, five minutes, work up to 15 minutes a day to just sit and I'll tell you the power of that cannot be underestimated because some of my, I would say many have not even say most, but I would say many hearts, almost like half and half of my decisions that I have made in life that have have been my most successful have come when I have been sitting with it. So just several months ago I was looking for a particular person for my team and I thought I do not know where to find this person. I don't know where to find her. And I knew the skill set that I needed and I knew kind of what her personality type would be because I know who works well with me and who I work well with. But I just didn't know where to find her.   And so I started doing this little morning meditation where I would just literally sit with God where I just mean I have my prayers where I kneel and I talk with him, but I would just wake up in, the first thing I'd do is just lay in bed and I would just lay there and just have a meditation and just say “Good Morning!” to him and just invite him to my life and, and want to have that connection. Remember whatever that looks like to you, divine influence, higher power, the universe, whatever that is for you. But for me, I was just inviting God into my life to partner with me. And as I just laid there, I just had all these wonderful different thoughts that came through some difficult thoughts, process some of those and just feeling really good. And I just came to a place where I don't know if you know what I mean. I'm sure you do. But like it was almost without me thinking.   I wasn't really thinking about what I was doing. I just opened my eyes and I reached over and I had my cell phone next to me on my bed, which I don't ever reach for like that. I actually don't like doing my cell phone first thing in the morning. I like to do some other things and kind of connect with people and with God and that kind of thing. But I happen to have it there and I reached for it. So imagine this in a matter of half a second, right?   Open my eyes, reached for my phone, look on it, and I see this facebook request. Now I don't do those. I have an assistant that does those. So I looked at it and I thought, “Oh well, she looks nice,” and I pressed on it because I always like to vet them and I don't know what. I don't ever usually do this. So I friended them. It was a Saturday morning, so maybe that's why.   So I friended this Gal and I looked at it and I saw the, the very top where it says our skillset basically and what they do. It was exactly what I needed and I thought, “You're kidding me, like you are kidding,” but it didn't hit me fully because I'm still looking at ads just betting a facebook request.   I don't know how to explain that, but you know what I mean, where you're kind of your mind is still on this one track and it takes a minute to shift. Kay, remember I've had seven children, so a little delay.   There are sometimes, so I went, scrolled down to see, “Oh, she had really nice posts and she had good, good content and wow. Really genuine, authentic,” and then talked about moving and how she felt like it spiritually, this is what they needed to do and they weren't really keyed about it, but they knew in their souls this is what they need to do. And I was like, “Wow, what a good woman to follow that follow her soul and know what she needed to do.”   And then I saw a picture where they moved to beautiful green mountain. I was like, “Oh my gosh, that's gorgeous.” Wow. I wonder where that is. Scroll back up to the top because my neighborhood was my neighborhood. She just moved in a few streets away and I did not even know. It was incredible.   And so we connected that morning and met and then it was incredible. I mean she had just exactly what I needed. It was amazing for me. That was a miracle. That was like an incredible miracle. And it started with sitting. So does that make sense? A little play on words there.   Sometimes to start it is about sitting and sometimes starting is sitting means that you are starting and I'm not even going to go backward. Like you know, what comes first chicken or the egg egg is whatever.   We're just going to skip that. But I just want you to keep that in mind. The power of that space of sitting with yourself, your soul, your situation, whatever...And just instead of go, go, go knowing it's time for me to do this for now because I got this rumble, I've got this resentment, I got this anger, I've got this frustration, I've got this. I don't know what the “Hey, I'm doing and I got to stop and think this through.” That's that sitting space. Okay.   The other part is the start part. Now this I find when I'm talking with people, especially if they're at that upper level space and they're leaping from one comfort zone to this unknown, but there is so is so already there and yet they're just struggling to make those individual steps.   You know, it's kinda like an Einstein or a tesla where they did all the work shopping in their brain and they already had created these things already fixed the problems and things and then guess what they had to do that. It's still physically create it, you know, that can be kind of annoying when you actually workshop it in your brain and it's all done. It's like beauty and then you actually have to work with the temporal tools to build the thing that you wanted to do. It can be really annoying.   So sometimes we just don't want to start because our soul already knows the work that's involved and were like, I'd really rather binge watched my favorite show or sometimes the start, we just don't even know where to begin. So it's feel so confusing and overwhelming because we just don't even know how to start.   We're excited about it, but we just don't even know how to get going...   And so watch for those. Ask Yourself, what is the obstacle to my starting? Is it because I don't know what I'm supposed to do? Is it because I'm afraid of what I'm to do? Is it because I really would love help in what I'm doing and I don't have help, I don't have support. I don't have someone saying you got this. So consider those are just a few of the questions, but ask yourself some of these. Find out questions when you sit with yourself, do you like that closed loop there?   All right. So for example, I write and I write fiction and nonfiction and I've written 17 books and how I have done them is mostly I have to make myself start. Oftentimes I start because have an idea in my head and I know I just have to get it down and so I'll do my fiction by scenes.   The scenes will come to me and I'll write them down, but then I actually have to go through and finish and finesse and do all of the plot line and all of that...I still have to do all the nitty gritty work, but a lot of times those I will start by the sitting moments. Meaning I'm doing dishes and vacuuming. I get my best ideas vacuuming, I swear. Do you find that that there's some anonymous, I call it emotional or creative white noise and so you have the sort of emotional white noise and suddenly that creativity can pop. That's what happens for me. So when I say sit, you know, women never sit. Okay. Even when we're like sitting, we're mentally cleaning out a purse...   So anyhow, my sort of sitting sometimes is these dishes, vacuuming, mundane activities and I find that I get these ideas for scenes or books or podcasts or things like that. So sometimes the starting place is really that sitting, but it's getting me started on that project.   So consider if you can just start and reverse it started so that those scenes, those ideas, those project organization skills start coming... So for example, when I am doing a book and I am just not feeling it, not feeling the ticky tack logistics of it and make myself do a five minute session, just five minutes, five minutes. I said I'm just going to sit at that laptop for just five minutes and then I, I'm released. I don't have to do any more editing, I don't have to do any more flatlining. I'll just do five minutes. I'll come back and do it really tomorrow. No problem.   So I do my five minutes. What do you think happens? Nine Times out of 10? Yeah. I'm going on and on and on. I've got the stiff arm to my kids and I say go get a snack from the gap and I'll be with you in a minute. And, and I've got phone calls coming in and I'm like, “Too bad. So sad.”I'm on a roll. And that's what happens because I've unlocked that paralysis and I've just done. That's what we have to do sometimes is just do that whole Nike thing. They have it right. We just do it. Sometimes we just got to step in.   I know a friend of mine, he wrote his entire novel, I think it was three years, but it was doing writing 15 minutes a day. So my suggestion to you is you sit for 15 minutes and then you start for 15 minutes a day. Can you see the beautiful symmetry of that though? Yeah.   And I can promise you it will yield incredible results that 15 minutes of just being still and the 15 minutes of doing just doing so again, just like you did with the sitting. Maybe you start with one, three, five minutes maybe for the doing, you just do one task or you just do it for five minutes, whatever that is. Because that's what it's all about. I love that anonymous quote. I say it all the time.   If not now, when, if you're not going to start in five minutes or do it for five minutes today, what are you going to do it? When are you actually gonna do it. There's going to not be the ideal time, so five minutes. That's as long as it takes for you to fight the feelings of wanting to do something. So just just do it.   All right. I love that...has anybody seen Holes? Okay. #Holes. I love that show...   Sigourney Weaver, when she's like, “Just do it.” I say that to my kids all the time. We have the best lines from that show…   All right, so that is my tips for today. Have sit and start-the balance redefined between those two. When do you need to sit? When is the needs to start?   And my challenge for you today is try to do a bit of both...Starting with maybe five minutes or less to sit in five minutes or less to start and then post a comment and tell me how it worked for you. Tell me how that helped you in your life or if it really stunk, then tell me that too.   But I would love to hear that, and also below-#sitstart, #balancedredefined... Hashtag these fabulous things. If you've found value in what I said today and the quotes that I shared or any of the concepts that I shared about getting that vulnerability and that sitting space from Brene Brown, then #BreneBrown.   I love her stuff. So hashtag those things that were important to you and if you have solutions that have come to mind, we'll post those below. Don't be stingy.   Let us know what they are and you might totally blessed and invite someone to change their life today by the things that you are posting.   So I encourage you to do that. If you can't think of something, just do #thisrocks, right? That's always a solid.   All right. Hopefully you got great stuff today. I know I've had a ball and I've had some other thoughts that have come up for me too because I'm starting something.   And so after this I'm probably gonna sit preferably with a Brownie. Enjoy. And join for some more balance redefined podcasts.   You got it. Thanks for listening and remember to rate and subscribe. And if you are feeling the need for real balance in your life, get your free five step life plan, and get started today! Just go to conniesokol.com/download.  

What's going on everyone? This is Steve Larsen and you're listening to Secret MLM Hacks radio. So here's the real mystery. How do real MLM'ers like us [inaudible 00:00:08] and only bug family members and friends, who want to grow a profitable home business? How do we recruit A players into our down lines and create extra incomes? Yet still have plenty of time for the rest of our lives? That's the blaring question and this podcast will give you the answer. My name is Steve Larsen and welcome to Secret MLM Hacks radio. Hey, hope you guys are doing great. I'm so sorry, it's been a little while since I've been publishing out to you guys, feels like that anyway. There's a little bit of a lull there anyway, and it's because a lot of stuff has been happening. Been busy, busy and building a lot of stuff, putting a lot of things together for those in the MLM community. A lot of people who are excited about something I've been putting together, you know getting ready to launch, which is my secret MLM hack's course and super excited for it. I've got a little group that I've been taking through ahead of time before the public as you know can have it, and it's been, been a whole lot of fun really enjoyed the interaction back and forth. Not just with like, hey yes this works but like the validation as far as like yeah this is not just works, like it's freaking cool you know. So anyway I'm excited, I'm excited for everyone else to have, and I'm excited for those pieces if you're interested and just want to get on the waiting list anyway, just go to secretMLMhacks.com, and you can watch the whole launch there. So anyway I'm about to send out, now I've kind of talked before ... If you guys, if this is the first episode you're hearing us, I would probably go back and start at number one. Because what I'm about to talk about kind of builds on other things. I've been sending out, I literally paid two VA's a thousand bucks, and they went, and they created a list of the top 100 MLM influencers as well as their contact information like their physical address. What I've been doing is I've been, I have been mailing physically packages to these people for the last four months. What month is it? It's October, one, two three, yeah, this is the fourth month, and I've been mailing stuff physically to these people the last four months. I started with other various nick knacks and I know I've talked about that before in the past. The reason I'm doing it is because of a few very key things. Number one this is not my first podcast show. I have a separate podcast show and as much as I love the community, and it's awesome, but the sheer volume of people who reach out to me I cannot handle it. It's too many, right and that's why you have like a support team that's where I shouldn't say support team, but that's why you have like your main captains underneath you and your crew too right. They better be rock stars you're not just trying to get anybody, you're trying to get rock stars. So that they can handle and help you be able to manage the team. So like when people reach out to me directly, it's like oh man I can't handle the volume you know. So it's the exact same thing like ... The amount of E-mails I have right now is insane. So I'm constantly like, I'm hiring, I'm getting people in the right place, I'm putting stuff just so that my organization can react appropriately. You know, which is something you guys are all going to have to do if you've not done before. But anyway there's a really key lesson there with that with what I just said, I'm not a Tony Robbins figure, right? I know that and that's OK, and I'm not a ... I'm not an Eric Worre figure. I'm not ... you know any other top massive MLM'er you can think of. I'm not a Ray Higden, I'm not one of those, you know one of the big, big big people who's out there. I'm literally an Internet sales funnel builder who figured out how to automate building his down line. Yeah and it works, and it still does. Just yesterday got another message from someone I've never met before, and they said, "Hey I don't even know what you're in, I just want to join you 'cause it's you." I was like sweet. Like it happens all the time. It kind of surges in like there'll be days where it's just like day after day, multiples lots of people and then there'll be a little time where there's not, and then bam tons of people and then other times it's not. It's cool to watch that how it comes in. But what I'm saying is okay I'm not like a huge giant, and I already can't handle the amount of messages coming in. So let's think about this, if I want to get a hold of really big people in the MLM industry, should I send them a freaking E-mail? No, they're going to do what I do, and they're never going to look at it. It's not because they don't appreciate it or they're not being rude. It's literally because if they sat and answered E-mails they would not do anything else. There's so much the volume they can't handle it. So how do I get past that? I'm like huh, well I could write a letter, like well now might look like junk mail and be kind of weird. How do I really get this past? How do I send a message directly to that person? A package, a package, so that's what I've been doing. Right now I'm holding this it's this white box and inside the box is, it's going to be this is the fourth package I'm sending out. The first package if you want to hear what those items were you can listen back a little bit. But basically these packages they're going out right. I've got a list of 100 people, and they're going out and with increasing value as far as packages. Each one cost me about 10 bucks, and there's 100 people, so it's about you know about a grand every single time I do it. Grand to two grand around there every time I do it. Basically what I do is I ship out to these people stuff that helps them create a relationship with me. Over and over, and over again, and stuff that helps them realize like, oh my gosh Steve Larsen's a real cool guy, like you know I want them to think I'm cool, you know, obviously. So I ship out all these different things to them. So if you're trying to ... Just think about this with your own MLM, with your own down line, if you're trying to get someone to join you, whose kind of a big figure, which those are the only kind of people in my mind who should be trying to recruit. Really think about what I'm saying right there, in my mind those are the only kinds of people that I think that you should be trying to recruit. Because right they're runners, right they're hard to get a hold of for a reason. They are people who are already in motion. You want people who are already in motion, you don't want people who are trying to get in motion, those people are projects you know. It's again and we love everyone we try to help everyone we can but like as far as this is a business, and I would not hire somebody who's not already qualified does that make sense? Same thing with my down line. Someone the other day reached out to me and said, "Hey I don't, you answer me personally, or I won't join your down line." I answered back, and I said, "Honestly joining my down line is by application only, and if you want to join my down line you have to go to such and such URL which I'm not going to say on this podcast right here. You actually have to apply to join my down line." For a specific reason you know, and I talked about that like two episodes ago. But anyway, so I need to get a message past these big people's receptionists, I got to get them passed right the junk mail, I got to get them past E-mail, I got to get them passed ... How do I get a message directly to them? I send them a bulky message. So anyway, this fourth one that I'm sending out, it's kind of clever, it's a message in a bottle, literally. It is, it's a bottle, you can hear the little pop. There's the little bottle bart with the cork popping off,` and inside the cork is a USB, it's literally a USB drive. I think 16 gigs and what I do is I'm putting it ... you know when you guys go to secretMLMhacksradio.com, if you go to secretMLMhacksradio.com, there is the MLM master's pack. That's a five day video series that I filmed to just help people understand more of my take on MLM and how different it is, and it's free, right. But the chances are that these guys probably have no idea what those things are, right? They've never seen them, and they don't know the kind of stuff that I talk about, and they don't know ... So what I'm doing is I'm loading all those videos, as well as a personal message onto this flash drive, and I'm sending them literally a message in a bottle with a letter that talks about how I came up with those videos, which is pretty awesome. I'm excited to do it. That's what I've been up to lately as I prep for this launch and to keep getting people excited for what it is I'm putting out there. So I'm excited to do it, I'm pumped to do it. Real quick though I wanted to tell you guys how I come up with good bait like that because I gave it away for free. You think, Stephen why would you give something like that away for free, that's ridiculous. Well it's because the kinds of people that it attracts are awesome people who are the kind of people that want to have in my down line, right? So when you think about this with ... Now if you love your MLM for heaven's sake stay in it like I'm not here to pitch you. That's why you never know the name of the one that I'm in. That's why I don't do that, by now you should know that. So what I'm trying to show you though is some of the tactics and strategies that I've been using to help the process. It's like the beginning gates of Otter recruiting and number one you got to attract people to you. Which first of all means that you must be somewhat of a charismatic leader or attractive character. You have got to be, people buy you they don't buy the MLM, so you've got to be amazing. If you're having a hard time doing that you know you can work on that. The other way I do though, 'cause most people teach that, what most people don't teach though is look create products that you should charge for. They're so good that you charge for, that you're giving away for free, and use that as a way to attract people to you. That's exactly what the MLM masters pack is. You can go check it out, and you watch the sequence I pull you through, and you watch all that and there's call to actions eventually to go check out the product eventually. But it's like I don't lead with those types of things I lead with value. So if you're getting the wrong kind of person, if you routinely are not getting the kind of person you want to have in your down line my guess is that you've not created a good filter. You know basically bait to get good people, right it's just like just like fishing right? If you switch ... if you've got good bait you'll get good fish. You get the kind of fish that you put the bait in the water, it's the exact same principle. That's how I do it, so anyway this is literally, so better bait equals better prospects. This is the three step little checklist that I use to qualify good bait. Number one it's got to be easy to consume, that's why I chose video. It's literally the least, I'm catering to the least common denominator. I want people when they go watch those videos to be like, might as well grab a bag of chips, you know what I mean, like I want the kind of ease of consumption. Meaning I'm not trying to make them think right out the gate. I'm not trying to ... I'm trying to just appeal to them I'm trying to ... Anyway so number one it's got to be easier to consume, massive blog posts, you better make sure the kind of person you want to set a down line is a big reader. Like 'cause you know, there's a reason I'm podcasting this, is because you just got to put me in your ears. You know it's OK it's really easy to consume. This is another form of bait. This podcast is another form of bait. You know for the actual course, that's why I'm doing it and to share some stuff with you guys and also bring the right people to me. So if you're not doing that kind of stuff, in your down line insider like it's, that's ludicrous in my head. So anyways number one it's got to be easy to consume. Number two, it has to be so good that they should have paid for it. It has to be ... Meaning you can give free stuff away that's pure garbage, but you need to actually solve legitimate problems for the person, and they should have paid you for it but they didn't. That builds this massive feeling of reciprocity inside their head. All right so here's the third thing, you have to give your bait away with an expectation of following up, does that make sense? The reason why I don't just give all five videos away from my MLM masters pack. The reason I don't give it all away in one big shot? Is because I want people to get in the habit of opening up E-mails from me, so it's five days spread out. Now the reality is they could just go change the URL on the top to the next day, day two, day three, day four and they'd go to the very next video. But I'm trying to train them and help them understand that like, yes like open stuff from me it's good stuff. I'm not sending you garbage, and I do a lot of thinking to make sure that it helps solve problems for you. So anyway those are the three things, so one thing I would do guys is I would sit down, and I would list out like 10 things that you could give away for free. All right, whether it's a video series teaching different MLM tactics, or it could be like a report you know showing the status of the current MLM client, climate. Industry climate, does that make sense? Or it could be you know one of the easiest things to do is to go interview top MLM'ers and then give away the interview. Just give away the interview, you're going to get great people coming to you like that, does that make sense? Some of the first bait I ever created I just, all I did as I put it on YouTube with a link down in the description. I cannot believe the amount of traffic that came from that there was no ads, I didn't spend any ad money. I wasn't doing anything sneaky or SEO like, I was doing, there was no technical stuff. I literally recorded a video, and I put it on YouTube with the link in the description, and it was so good though people should have paid for it. There was an expectation that I gave away in the video that they should follow up. It was easy for them to consume and it started bringing great people towards me. That's all I've got for you guys is that if you don't have these little, one of the things that pissed me off so much about the first MLM I joined, is that they kept telling me, "It's passive income, oh my gosh it's passive income." But every time I saw any one of my up lines doing anything, there was nothing passive about it. They were sprinting, sprinting, those guys were working like 60 hour weeks and then saying, "it's passive income". I was like there is nothing passive about what you're doing. So, if you want to be the only method that people are going to hear about your message, meaning your mouth, don't go create bait. If you want to start the process of duplicating yourself, this isn't the full thing, but it's the first step towards true duplication. Then you have got to go create bait, you've got to go create this bait and whatever it is. Go create different things, interview people, create reports, make videos. You don't even need to be the one coming up with the stuff. You can hire that crap out, or you could go find someone and say, "Hey look I got this and such and such date, or I've got these people on a list or whatever. You know here's my list and there's my contribution you make this stuff we'll split the thing." You know what's cool is that now you can give that bait away as a tool to anyone who joins your down line. Those are like the first big steps of you creating actual duplication, which is very hard to do. The system has got to be duplicatable. It's the marketing system that becomes duplicatable that, that's actually what creates the longevity. So anyway, guys I hope that helps, all I'm trying to say is create bait create things that people don't ... Don't be your own bottleneck and, which is usually how it is. So, that's the only reason I'm bringing this up, is I keep seeing it. People are reaching out to me, they're like, "How do I do this?" Like well so far you literally have no digital assets so go create something and then we'll start talking. So anyway hopefully that helps guys if you do want to see what I've been using for bait. it's just one of the things that I use, it's the MLM master's pack. You can go check it out at secretMLMhacksradio.com, and yeah that's it guys. Hey I'll talk to you later, and go crush it. Hey thanks, please remember to subscribe and leave feedback for me. Do you have a question you want answered live on the show? Go to secretMLMhacksradio.com to submit your question and download your free MLM masters pack.