Battlestar Bros.

"I think it's my last one." Pat ranks the finale's flashbacks. Matt finds that he prefers politics to space battles. Mike still frakkin' loves Battlestar Galactica.

There's time for just one last toast to Galactica, before we head into the series finale. Matt's of mixed mind about meeting more Sixes. Pat has had it up to here with prophecy. Mike thinks Gaius just wants to be a bitch.

What do you do after you've fulfilled your purpose? Do you carry on, or sink into drudgery and despair? Mike is the most epic college student who ever existed. Pat thinks Starbuck's father should've been Daniel. Matt hates that the writers twisted the knife on Helo and Athena.

Did you know Cylon babies have built-in emotional WiFi? Well, now you do. Matt's boggled by this episode's sudden regressions. Mike questions whether Six should have been allowed to have a child in the first place. Pat feels Saul's love fill the room.

Let us save you some time: There wasn't one. Mike explains Edward James Olmos's false promises. Matt has a slightly better time than he expected. Pat would not recommend you watch The Plan.

If you've been waiting for answers about the Final Five, this is the episode for you. Guest host Joe celebrates the return of his favorite character. Pat details his painstakingly assembled, thirteen-point Cylon timeline. Matt enjoys that this data dump has real stakes. Mike questions whether anyone ACTUALLY has free will.

The revolution failed, but things are still going to change within the Colonial(?) Fleet. Mike thinks the Basestar would wreck Galactica. Pat appreciates Zarek's consistency. Matt loves that Gaius is finally self-aware.

The Gaeta-Zarek revolution begins, testing each and every person aboard Galactica. Matt admires this episode's many smart callbacks. Mike mourns Private Jaffee. Pat takes stock of Gaeta's motivation.

We wanted Roslin to take a day off, but not like this. Not like this. Pat's not into Saul and Six. Matt understands Lee's desire to soft-sell. Mike sees the Anti-Cylon faction's point, but doesn't understand Gaeta's actions.

We have met the enemy, and he is Sharon. Mike can't bring himself to care. Pat doesn't understand why Gaeta's alive. Matt thinks the Eights are actually defective.

There's no Deus Ex Cylonica; Earth is not the end. Guest host Anna gets Mike a gift. Matt argues that Dee is stronger than Adama. Pat tries explaining how the 13th Tribe could be Cylons.

"We have arrived ... at Earth." Matt doesn't understand Three's escalations. Pat admires Saul Tigh's choice. Mike knows there's more to come, and that it's all part of God's plan.

The Hybrid is going to carry this Human-Cylon alliance ON ITS BACK, y'all. Pat gets teary-eyed, as Roslin makes her feelings known. Mike understands the impulse to let Gaius die. Matt considers the implications of faux-Athena's actions.

We had hope for the human race, until they killed Romo's cat. Now, burn it all down. Matt knows Bill Adama's not a realist. Pat's sitting in a Raptor, waiting for Roslin to return. Mike, for one, welcomes our new Adama overlord.

Listen, Gaeta. Just take the godsdamn drugs, alright? You don't want to be awake for what's coming. Mike outplans multiple Colonial military officers. Matt encourages Roslin to take management courses. Pat listens to Gaeta's Lament.

Join us as we dip our toes in the river of Faith, and hopefully make it to the other side. Pat's willing to buy whatever religion Nana Visitor's selling. Matt sees shades of season three Galactica. Mike is affected by the Sixes' story.

There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of Good Guy Helo™. Mike thinks Tory's twisting the knife. Pat doesn't believe in the power of handshakes. Matt still doesn't know who Mathias is.

Pain. Guilt. Pleasure. Love. The Final Five are feeling all these emotions, and having trouble distinguishing between them. Pat doesn't understand Caprica Six's philosophy. Matt is here for Tory's apotheosis. Mike wonders whether a sex cult-less society is worth living in.

Even in death, Cally is just an object to be acted upon. Pat wonders how many soldiers you can fit in a garbage truck. Mike hopes to Gods that having a kid isn't like this. Matt's BSG experience comes full-circle, as he watches Cally die for the second time.

One of our favorite characters is pointing a gun at one of our other favorite characters, so let's get right to it. Matt wonders why the Cylons are here. Pat wants Starbuck to use her inside voice. Mike wishes Lee a fond military farewell.

In this episode, we're back in the present, managing season three's finale fallout. Mike bitches about waiting a year and a half for this excellent episode. Matt is happy that (most) everyone is happy for Kara. Pat doesn't understand why everyone's ready to sex up Gaius Baltar.

Join us as we flash back to a simpler time, when Helena Cain was Admiral, Pegasus wasn't ka-sploded, and Lt. Kendra Shaw was learning to become a razor. Matt contrasts Cain and Adama's post-apocalypse rallying cries. Mike savors the First Hybrid's portents of season four. Pat explains why Razor's extended version is worth watching.

The trial of Gaius Baltar. Four of the Final Five revealed. And, as if that weren't enough, Kara's back. Pat pokes holes in Romo Lampkin's defense. Matt is swept up in the possibilities the Final Five present. Mike is ready for all this to happen again.

Guest host Joe Drew joins us for the introduction of Romo Frakkin' Lampkin. Mike prematurely trademarks Drunk Adama Decisions. Pat doesn't believe anything Lampkin says. Matt can't understand why Lee won't talk to his wife.

"Her ship's in pieces. No chute. We lost her." Mike argues that Kara needed to be in the cockpit. Pat knows Starbuck would do anything to avoid her issues. Matt wonders how the season finale is going to top this episode.

With the Cylons nowhere in sight, the fleet's workers demand better conditions and a fairer society. Pat's willing to barter for Baltar's tell-all. Matt understands why workers' rights might've taken a backseat 'til now. Mike would've put Cally against the wall.

What does it mean to realize your most significant decision might've been wrong? That's the question at the heart of A Day in the Life. Pat attempts to convince us Cally has merit. Matt buys Adama getting mired in the past. Mike understands that love is a battlefield.

How far can the fleet tolerate the Sagittarions' "backward" beliefs? How far can the Sagittarions tolerate the fleet's prejudice? Matt goes hard for Detective Sherlock Helomes. Pat takes issue with the episode's monster-of-the-week structure. Mike finds it completely plausible that the fleet would retain its prejudices. 

Wouldn't it be nice to get away, Gaius? Too bad everybody in the fleet knows your name. Guest host Anna joins us to examine Baltar's mental state and finally put this Lee Adama drama to bed.

Look, behind you! It's a Cavil! Where'd he come from?! Who knows? Mike examines the politics of sending your wife to rescue your mistress. Pat is shocked to find Caprica Six once again snapping necks. Matt worries that Battlestar might be bad now.

The Cylons come in peace, and they're bringing Baltar with them. Matt's intrigued by the first real Human-Cylon negotiation. Mike wants Starbuck and Apollo to stop with the frakkin' charade. Pat can't quite connect the dots between the Human and Cylon religions.

A good premise meets a bad plot, as Kat gains some unnecessary backstory but loses her life. Mike never quite cares about Starbuck and Kat's dappled relationship. Pat wonders whether death means anything to the Cylon. Matt thinks this is BSG's first entirely detachable episode.

This episode certainly has an accurate title, because it feels pretty unfinished. Matt loves watching Good Guy Helo beat up on Lee Adama. Mike walks us through the more meaningful scenes from this episode's extended edition. Pat petitions Mike to let Starpollo go. So say we all.

It's retcon time again, as we learn about Admiral Adama's very well documented time on the Battlestar Valkyrie. Pat is pretty sure the Cylons didn't give a frak about Bulldog's mission. Matt tries, but fails, to get lost in the drama. Mike is willing to go along with it all as long as Adama and Tigh make up.

"Hey humanity, it's the Cylons here. We're gonna follow you to Earth. Is that okay? Do you mind? Baltar's helping us. He's gonna ... oh, you're gonna genocide us? Oh. Okay." Pat acknowledges the weight of Athena's loyalty. Matt attempts to figure out the Cylon virus's mechanics. Mike pities poor, tortured Gaius.

Gaius is cold. He is shamed. He is ... not quite lying naked on the floor. After all, the Cylons gave him a shirt last episode. Mike asks us where we'd project. Matt details his Cylon conspiracy theories. Pat knows not to bring kids near Starbuck.

You give people back their spaceships, and they immediately start airlocking each other. Mike can't find the moral high ground. Pat gets inside Starbuck's head. Matt figures out which Cylons are on Gaius's side.

These 14 months on New Caprica just flew by, didn’t they? Guest host Joe Drew returns to help us examine the uneven ending of one of Galactica’s more contentious arcs.

Peace is impossible without trust, and trust is impossible without understanding. There's no understanding, no trust, and no peace on New Caprica. Pat wishes Starbuck a happy Mother's Day. Matt enjoys watching Roslin straddle the line between compassion and resistance. Mike joins Lee and the Cylons in calling New Caprica a lost cause.

"What's the deal - with humans? Why can't they just accept the Cylon?" Mike elaborates on the occupation's real world parallels. Pat goes to bat for Ellen "I really do love my husband" Tigh. Matt loves watching Lee literally eat the scenery.

Are you ready to drink the Cylon Kool-Aid? Or are you gonna join up with the resistance? Pat knows there ain't room for crybabies in the resistance, but wonders why that excludes capable, qualified women. Matt nerds out about the process of getting 25 minutes of web content made. Mike thinks Saul knew exactly what would happen at the temple.

Election day. Caprican rescue. New Cylons. New Caprica. One. Year. Later. Mike separates his politics and his personal preferences. Matt compares one-liner bros Brother Cavil and Doc Cottle. Pat is the only one who wouldn't have fixed the fleet's presidential election. Oh, also, we yell at each other about the state of America for a bit. Just a bit though.

Of course there's a godsdamn Head Gaius. Of course there is. Mike wants to know how British the Cylons are going to get. Pat examines what the Cylon plan (or plans) might actually be at this point. Matt is very scared of Head Six, but wonders how she can be fooled.

There's no time like the present for promoting your son twice in a row. Nice nepotism, Adama. Also, there be politics in this episode. You've been warned. Mike wants Starbuck to gather her shit, put it in a bag, and get it together. Pat finds himself agreeing with Roslin's difficult decision. Matt understands Roslin's logic, but not her execution.

Put Lee, Ellen, Billy, and Dee in a room, add in a pissed-off Dana Delaney with a bunch of guns, and baby, you've got an episode of Galactica going. Matt finds his favorite Galactica writer. Mike thinks Sharon may have taken a harder turn than was necessary. Pat springs his trap from last episode, as Starbuck shoots a friendly.

For this special April Fools edition, the Farscape Fellas take a look at Battlestar's eccentric predecessor. Mike wrestles with his feelings for puppets. Matt enjoys flashbacks that actually serve the narrative. Pat attempts to justify putting his friends in this situation.

Guest host Joe Drew is back to take a look at an episode he holds (or held) in high-esteem, as bad Cylon motherfrakker Scar arrives to take on Starbuck and Kat. Mike thinks his ship is sinking, and he doesn't seem wrong. Matt is all-in for the Starbuck of Cylons. Pat understands Kat's fear, but finds her rage fabricated.

We finally take on what many believe is Battlestar's worst episode, a "detective story" that requires no detecting and is barely a story. Mike watches his favorite character get dragged through the mud. Matt joins Mike in pointing out that you don't buy gifts for your prostitute's child. And 48 hours earlier, Pat examines the logistics of policing the fleet.

Remember meaningful character development? Serial storytelling? Plot points that build on each other and make sense within BSG's already established narrative? "Epiphanies" doesn't. Pat wants y'all to take to Twitter with the hashtag #NotMyRoslin. Matt joins Sharon in critiquing this episode's writing. Mike ends up being right about Gaius's motivations.

What kind of society is worth saving? That's the question at hand in Resurrection Ship. Pat sees a bit of Admiral Cain in Starbuck and thinks that Cain does too. Mike compares the lines that Cain and Adama are willing to cross. Matt thinks the troubled Admiral may have gotten exactly what she wanted in the end.

Most serialized stories have one arc that stands above the rest. An arc that people come back to and re-watch time and time again. That stands out as the series's defining story. Welcome to Pegasus. Matt appreciates how Pegasus twists established BSG tropes to create something new. Pat takes stock of the Battlestar Pegasus and its troubled commander. Mike gets to discuss his second-favorite scene in the series. And Joe(!) joins the podcast to make sure we give Tricia Helfer, James Callis, and Tricia Helfer's incredible performances their due.