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A casual rambling, through the stories and associated thoughts of a man approaching middle-age with the mind, and maturity, of a middle-teen. Sometimes with guests, always with swearing.

Sidney


    • Feb 1, 2024 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 1h 44m AVG DURATION
    • 45 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from F.L.E?!

    45 - Just Walk it Off, You'll be Fine

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 1, 2024 95:53


    Howdy! We're very sorry for the delay! In this episode, Sidney and Camel talk best and worst kinds of injuries, and which is easier to stomach, television shows from years gone by, remakes, the ins and outs of religion and why oh why is there feet?! Not to mention cauliflower cheese and...black pudding?! Are you mental woman?! The tax man might be watching! Hope you all enjoy!

    44 - Is It Nearly Summer Yet?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 31, 2024 112:05


    Unsurprisingly, food is on the agenda for a hefty amount of this episode, favourite pastry stops, the pros and cons of a cold pie, shit butties and what not to ask for in an English fish 'n' chip shop. We discuss THE correct way to load a dishwasher and the consequences of not doing so and for f**s' sake, would someone pass me the ketchup! Boy-racers get a slagging, that kid from that advert gets more air time and the threat of toxoplasmosis should be keeping us all awake at night! Hope you enjoy! Have a great week!

    43 - World's Strongest Prefer Not to Say

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 17, 2024 91:39


    Spoiler alert...Tom Stoltman is no longer the world's strongest man, sad times. Camel and I talk strength in men, women and non-binary people, WSM history, car crash stories, annoying adverts, the trappings of getting older and why snooker would be better if there were goats in it. Hope you enjoy listening to our pish!

    42 - We Practically Live Together at This Point, But DO NOT Keep the Buttons!

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 10, 2024 130:42


    My official/unofficial co-host is back, new year (but why bother) same us! Resolutions kept or unkept, why does it even matter at this point?! Approaching, or just passed middle age, grumpiness comes to us all! For what it's worth, we hope you had a good festive period and I hope you don't jinx anyone by being so bold as to wish anyone a happy new year! You cheeky c***s! Hope you enjoy!

    41 - Four and One, Forty One

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2024 122:12


    Welcome back! New year, new episode! This episode, is a standalone second-part, kinda but not really. Camel and I discuss public transport woes, the frightening world of YouTube, when do you consider yourself a pro and celebrate another malfunction in the recording process. This episode is sponsored by, nobody. Hope you enjoy!

    40 - The Big Four-O

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 27, 2023 101:35


    A not-so-festive episode (I mean, there's a bit of Santa talk but that's about it) with the mighty Camel. We discuss festive traditions in our respective homes, my lacklustre approach to podcasting and speculate (again) about being the least bit consistent in future. Hope you all had a great festive break, if and when you celebrated.

    39 - Yes Big Man!

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 9, 2022 138:11


    Well, hello there! Camel's back! I'm back! We're all back! Back again! In this episode we consider the value of infinity, the vast emptiness of space and, “accessible” hotel rooms, the fear of early onset dementia, how hormones and doctors can f**k you, unhelpful counter staff, how my personality has changed over the last two years and how you should get that bast**d cream off my dessert. Hope you enjoy our conversation, have a great week!

    38 - When Albinos Attack!

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 8, 2022 65:24


    Hello there chiefs and chiefettes! I'm back in the wardrobe for this solo episode and raring to go! I talk about a recent run-in with the only natural predator of humans (that I am aware of), the albino! Dun, dun, duuuuuuuuun! The ineptitude of a well-known courier company, what does and does not constitute a sport, the disgusting habits of MPs and why lying about class A drugs isn't always a good thing. I hope you enjoy this episode and have a great weekend!!

    37 - A Hot Duvet Tent

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 25, 2022 41:08


    Hi everybody! Happy Friday! This, shorter-than-average solo effort is brought to you on-location from inside a duvet, in a room, in a Premier Inn. Not THE Premier Inn but one very similar. This time, I'm talking about schoolyard limericks, my mate's massive penis, being accosted by strangers in toilets and what exactly is wrong with my face anyway?! I consider the comfort drawn from being back on the road again and the discomfort drawn from a back injury. I hope you all have a great weekend!

    tent duvet premier inn
    36 - Terrington Bramley-Johnstone aka Trevor Bell aka The Cheltenham Doppelgänger

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2022 67:33


    Hi everybody! Trev's back! We discuss (amongst other things) the optimal nap length required to feel a bit better than sub-human, real-life espionage and the future of technology, gaming and VR, how easy it is to overdose on social media, why we've become desensitised to horror movies and what in the actual f**k is a UFO anyway?! I hope you enjoy this episode, and I hope you all have a great weekend, whatever you identify as.

    35 - Heather Brown

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 11, 2022 109:23


    Hello there! In this episode, I talk to podcaster, actor, wife, mother and voiceover star, Heather Brown. We talk about her stint on the 2002 TV show, “Rockface” (for which she even has an IMDb credit!), her work as a voice actor and the kinds of work she does (adverts, audio books, educational videos, etc,) her own podcast, “Speak Out Not In”, which is available on all good podcasting platforms, her work with the Samaritans, the value of self-worth and the strength that can be drawn from it and we discuss the merits of saying, f**k now and again. We also touch on the pros of being the first-lady to the Evil Emperor Ming. Hope you all enjoy our conversation, have a great weekend!

    34 - Bigfoot's Inter-dimensional Dick.

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 4, 2022 160:07


    Hello there! In this episode, I talk to Stevie B Dot Net V2.0, about the pro's and con's of remote-working, self-contained industrial espionage, the origins of patriotism in the good ol' US of A, we reminisce about simpler times, at what point does one's interest in social media wean and does it tie-in with F.O.M.O reducing as we get older and more content? We talk about the evolutionary cycle of ingenuity, conspiracy theories and the inconvenient surprise that Bigfoot's inter-dimensional lip-stick would prove to be. Hope you all have a great weekend!

    33 - Heeeeeeeere's Camel!

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 25, 2022 140:48


    I've reached a thousand plays! Thank you all so very much for continuing to listen! My most frequent guest is back! In this episode, we discuss the pros of LinkedIn, how insignificant the night sky makes us feel, we display our distinctly-average-at-best, "knowledge" of world politics and current affairs, I give an update on my rehab and the next phase of my recovery, I vent about a recent telephone confrontation with a financial institution and we consider what a mind-f**k the passage of time can be when you stop and think about it. And for anyone in the vicinity of Aberdeen this Saturday evening (26th of Feb), Noel Gallagher's High Flying Carpets are playing a gig at Drummonds Aberdeen. Details can be found on the venue's FB page, here: Drummonds Aberdeen - Home | Facebook. Standard tickets are £10 or £12.50 at the door. Have a great weekend everyone!

    32 - My Old Man's Not a Dustman

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 18, 2022 81:27


    I've kept it in the family again this week, and spent an hour or so chatting to my dad. I might be biased but I always enjoy talking to him (when we do talk, I'm bad at keeping in touch with people at the best of times!), we talk about some of his old workmates, his exercise habits, some of the ways he's influenced me, talk about a few of his different career choices and have a laugh about accidentally discovering morons in day-to-day life. I hope you enjoy the episode, have a great weekend!

    31 - We're The Ponderers.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 11, 2022 154:33


    Hello there! My guest this time is Steph Smart. She is an actor, a director, lecturer, blogger, content creator, cousin and all-round good egg, with a masters degree and everything! We had a great conversation and I thoroughly enjoyed talking to her. We discussed how she discovered and rediscovered her passion for acting and how she inadvertently fell into the career she now has and loves, her part in Avengers: Infinity War (as crew, not on-screen, unfortunately), how a drugs raid put her off living in Dundee (I think Dundee put me off living in Dundee but to each, their own), where the responsibility for content lies, the boundary between being creative and showing-off, how to adult, where her inspiration for her blog comes from, the important lessons taught to us by Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit and why she's doing her utmost to not let M.E get the better of her. All this, and more! You can see her content at, SmartPonders – A blog pondering things great and small. (www.smartponders.com) and look her up on all the social medias under @smartponders. You can also check out her and her partner's other website, Motorbiking Adventures | A Couple of Bikers, where they blog about their adventures, touring on their bikes, around scenic Scotland. Have a great weekend everyone, thank you for listening.

    30 - Keith “Snake” Duncan

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 4, 2022 143:02


    Rugby, romance, classic Scottish comedy, the importance of humour and stereotypes. Another healthy abundance of wholesome topics are discussed in this episode, not to mention the usual suspects of photography and alcohol. Go check out Keith's instagram @keith_snake_duncan and perv at his photographs of deer and badgers and mountains and s**t. Have a great weekend!

    29 - Dad Tales, Bogies and a New Rig.

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 31, 2022 130:36


    Well, well, well. Here we are again. In this episode, I'm taking my new gear for a test run but worry not, for the first few minutes are filled with the same piss-poor audio quality and guerrilla production values that you all know and love. Camel's back and this time...it's personal! We discuss the new equipment and phantom disappearing acts, the multi-coloured by-products of a sinus infection, difficult customers, a tale or two about my father and whether or not it's safe to drive buses! As always, we have a giggle throughout and just be our usual, silly selves. I hope you all enjoy and thanks for listening!

    tales bogies
    28 - Let's Biff Each Other Into a Froth

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 24, 2022 120:07


    Returning to the podcast is the lovely Black Raven herself and this time, Mr. Black Raven joined the conversation, and what a conversation it is! Al fresco ablutions, tech speak, stories of dislocated joints and prosthetic limbs, we discuss festivals, the corrupt media, bin etiquette, hunting, ghosts and why the f*ck can't a famous person get a blue plaque around here?! Anyway, if you're in need of a florist with a bit of style and extra oomph about them then you can't do any better than Bec. Check out some of her work on instagram and FB, under @blackravenflorist and send any floristry-related/availability queries to blackravenfreelance@gmail.com. Have a great week everyone!!

    fb bec biff froth black raven
    27 - Re-election Announcement by the Mayor of Banchory

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2022 129:42


    In this episode, the one and only Booth, Greg Booth and I, discuss his intention to run for re-election, along with other hard-hitting topics such as the ‘vid (again), looking cool in cars (or not) and syentifics what with our big branes and that. Y'know, hormones n'sh*t. Hope you enjoy and have a great weekend!

    26 - Compulsory Happy New Year Episode!

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 4, 2022 186:12


    Happy New Year everyone! Unless of course you are Chinese or not a follower of the Gregorian calendar, in which case, ignore the opening statement. In this first episode of 2022 my guest (the one and only Camel) and I discuss many festive topics including sharting, fainting, the annual showing of World's Strongest Man on TV and shit presents (no pun intended). We have an in-depth talk about inspiration and man-splaining (which, for people who don't know, is when the patriarchy over-explains, in simplified terms, something which shouldn't need to be explained) and also talk about why some people should mind their f***ing business. Hope you all have had a fantastic Christmas and have a great first week back at work!!!

    25 - A Pair of Potty Mouths.

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 29, 2021 159:41


    In this poorly scheduled episode, the conveniently located, Camel returns for a vent and a chat about the failing standards of public toilets, the desire for a gym membership, his love of, “body magic” and a good old-fashioned flurry of swearing. Have a great week, I hope you enjoy!

    24 - 2 Funerals and a Birthday.

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 17, 2021 73:48


    In this happy-go-lucky episode, I talk about the death of my grandmother and uncle, my own death, the difficulty that is ordering a bastarding photograph cake and the joy of having a nice wee birthday lunch. I'm also definitely NOT an expert in traffic law. Enjoy!

    23 - Camel's back, back again...

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 22, 2021 124:22


    Fuckin' like ‘en?! In today's episode, my friend Camel and I take a heterosexual glance at gay culture, his dug spies a ghost and goes pure mental, our place within the universe and what it all means, bad jokes and getting offended, literature, history and all sorts of cultured pish! Enjoy! Also, if you're into giving to charity, have a look at julianhouse.org.uk, it's a worthwhile cause, they do great work, supporting vulnerable and at-risk individuals across South West England.

    22 - The Emperor Strikes Back...again.

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2021 128:11


    In this second attempt at a sequel, Del and I discuss a broad spectrum of topics including post-lockdown gigs, cancel culture, mental health and the work his partner does with Samaritans ( https://www.samaritans.org/?nation=scotland ), the necessity of debate, nanny states, RAF antics, the death of my grandmother and the pros and cons of swearing, amongst other things. For upcoming gig information on both the bands that Del plays in, take a look at the relevant Facebook pages, for Noel Gallaghers High Flying Carpets go to; https://www.facebook.com/nghfc/ and for Chasing Rainbows go to; https://www.facebook.com/ShedSevenTribute/. I hope you all enjoy the episode and have a great week!

    21 - I'm a Travelling Man.

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 12, 2021 60:55


    I'm back after a week off! I talk about my recent trip daaarn saaarf, sharting at a train station, falling out with wait staff over prawns, reminisce about my time as a taxi driver and generally ramble-on as per usual. I hope you enjoy and have a great week. By the way, if you're into products by The Body Shop, check out my friend's page, Little Gems Beautybox on Facebook here - https://www.facebook.com/groups/393114451709675/?ref=share

    body shop travelling man
    20 - Booth, Greg Booth aka The Mayor of Banchory

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 1, 2021 128:02


    Oh hi guys! This episode is a jumbo version at just over 2 hours long and boy, do we tackle some topics. We talk about the philosophy of Slimming World, self-image, setting up a brand, survival instincts, near-death experiences, mayoral duties, old man's poo dust, Greg's bid to be the next James Bond, the importance of a loaf tin and much, much more. Hope you all enjoy listening, have a great weekend!

    19 - 4 Guys, 1 Mic: Audio Bukkake.

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 23, 2021 95:23


    This episode is a 4 for 1 special! Two of my best friends and another fella, Camel, Keith “Snake” Duncan and Terry Brown aka Trevor Bell, sit down in a local hotel restaurant to shoot the shit and have a general, long-overdue catch-up. We chat about rubbing shoulders with celebrities, motorcycles, inappropriate photography, throwing shapes and one member of the waiting staff's incapacity to serve drinks, amongst a whole host of other things. Sorry for the background noise, I hope it doesn't detract too much from the conversation. Please enjoy and have a great weekend!

    18 - The Return of the Camel

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 17, 2021 106:34


    My first live guest! Making his second appearance on the podcast, my friend Camel. We cover some hard-hitting issues in this episode, including world poverty, gym etiquette, Roe Jogan, zoology, the developing world, Camel's fear of dentists...and his middle bollock. Enjoy! Hope you all have a great weekend.

    17 - One Giant Power Finger.

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 9, 2021 57:05


    In today's solo effort, I talk about rip-off merchants, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and a mechanised comedy penis. Enjoy! Have a great weekend!

    16 - Quoth The Raven, “fuckin' like ‘en!”

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 3, 2021 151:14


    This long overdue episode (with the right edit this time) features one of my dearest friends, and first female guest, Bec. We talk about a lot of things, children, setting up a business, horror films, music, shitting in tree stumps (although that was post-recording so I'll try and coax it out of her again for next time, the story, not shit) and just generally have a giggle. You can see her projects on Instagram at https://instagram.com/blackravenflorist?utm_medium=copy_link and on Facebook at https://m.facebook.com/blackravenfreelance/. Thank you for listening.

    15 - Keith ‘Snake' Duncan.

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 12, 2021 113:59


    My friend Keith and I, talk nicknames, trigger warnings, rugby hooliganism (or lack thereof), and post-pandemic plans. Check out Keith Duncan Photography on Instagram at keith_snake_duncan.

    14 - F****n' Knob-end

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 5, 2021 68:35


    Today's solo effort was brought to you by an absolute weapon of stupidity. I talk about my technical ineptitude, my absentee guest, an unfortunate incident involving a chilli seed and some more tales from Toulouse. Ads: For all your automotive service requirements, call Moe at Fin Finty Tint and, should you be in the North East of Scotland and find that your grass needs cutting or your thick bush needs brought under control, check out Green Grass & Son on FB to get a quote.

    13 - My Mate Stevie B Dot Net

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 26, 2021 134:52


    We discuss recruitment, heart-attacks, Brazilian Jiu-jitsu, Operation Beast Mode, we say f**k...a lot, career choices and a heap of other stuff. His website is stevieb.net (unsurprisingly) and he is also on Twitch and most other social media outlets. This episode is sponsored by the letter F.

    12 - My Mate Del ‘Evil Emperor Ming' Brown.

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2021 79:29


    Del is a musician, being a guitarist in the tribute band, Noel Gallagher's High Flying Carpets, and in this episode, we talked about more RAF detachment antics, gigging with his former band, Definitely Oasis and how he became the most powerful evil emperor on 111 squadron. I also deal with a minor technical issue. You can find the High Flying Carpets Facebook page at, www.Facebook.com/nghfc. Here you can find gig and ticket details for upcoming shows. Hope you enjoy!

    11 - My Ginger Friend Greig.

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 12, 2021 130:30


    My friend Greig and I talk about how lucky he was (and is) especially when it came to getting great seats at gigs, his new career as a streamer and how he came to become one hell of a photographer...shame he's a ginger. His Twitch channel can be found at twitch.tv/k46sleepwalker

    10 - Ooooh, Canada!..

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 7, 2021 62:55


    More detachment tales, a truck service gone wrong and why Spud, from Trainspotting, would be shite at fitting cooncil telly.

    9 - Herman Tett aka Calum aka Sandy Plooks aka My Mate Camel

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 27, 2021 144:50


    I chat to my mate Camel about plooks and t'aints and homeopathic medicine and soggy wantons...and a whole host of other things. Please forgive the echo on my part, I really hope it doesn't detract too much from the episode. I hope you enjoy the chat and have a great rest of your weekend.

    8 - Cheeky Number Two.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 20, 2021 57:00


    What else can you do when a guest unexpectedly cancels last-minute? You talk about bum-holes and sharting yourself, that's what. And I wonder why I've no sponsors yet??

    7 - Terry Brown aka Trevor Bell.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2021 126:30


    I learned lots of things in this episode, things like, that the Bearded Villains (https://www.beardedvillains.com/bearded-villains-our-club-est-2014) are NOT a biker gang, and that I'm not the only one that's a fan of a comedy penis. In fact, there are lots of us. What a relief! Hope you enjoy! (Also, check out Sam Hubbard on Instagram at, https://instagram.com/sam_hubbard_artist?igshid=to5szsbye2ou. There's some cool shit there.)

    sam hubbard terry brown bearded villains trevor bell
    6 - My Mate Keith and a Dodgy Mic.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 12, 2021 127:25


    I have my first guest!! Ok, so he is an old friend, both in age and length of friendship, but it was still a great chat and I found out some things about him that I didn't know before. I hope you enjoy listening to the episode as much as I enjoyed making it. Have a great weekend!! (Big thank you to, Hokusai 2, for being such an easy editing tool to use too!)

    5 - Cheeky In-betweeny with a Wah-low-per.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 8, 2021 62:28


    In this episode, I talk about a childhood deodorant accident, a walloper (or two) and the need for a distraction.

    4 - Hotels.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 1, 2021 55:05


    Tales of some of the weird and wonderful lodgings (mostly weird), I've had over the years, when I've been travelling away with work.

    3 - The Lost Episodes.

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 27, 2021 64:00


    I talk about my ineptitude when it comes to technology and my hopes and aspirations for the podcast and how it came to be. I also discuss the title. Compulsive listening!

    2 - The Poem.

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2021 40:14


    An attempt at some poetry and a story about a guy, numb from the neck up.

    The Very Beginning.

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2021 22:13


    The very first recording of when I thought about trying my hand at what so many others have done and do! It's rough but it's a start! Please forgive the rubbish audio, I was recording on my phone, in the truck, travelling down a mountain. Ideal recording conditions.

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