The Clueless Critic

We gonna lay some love on this 1963 Coronet Instructional Films, "Writing a Good Paragraph" Do you want to learn how to arrange your paragraphs logically according to time, space or contrast? Get in on this Riley pick in a special short (possibly final?) episode of The Clueless Critic.

Wreck-It Ralph is a 2012 American animated comedy film directed by Rich Moore. The film features the voices of John C. Reilly, Sarah Silverman, Jack McBrayer, and the amazing Jane Lynch. Hear our take on why the solid story and brilliant characters push this film from a beautiful landscape into a filmmaking masterpiece. And wow oh wow do we love King Candy!

The Devil at Your Heels is a 1981 documentary about the attempt of stunt driver Ken Carter to jump a rocket-powered car one mile over the Saint Lawrence River into a gentle nest of rose bushes. An Australian comedy show gave it a little boost of recognition when they aired it in 1993 and young Raph was on the scene to catch that consequential viewing. Enjoy this Marsonet pick on this installment of The Clueless Critic.

Dirty Ho is a 1979 Hong Kong martial arts comedy film directed by Lau Kar-leung and starring Gordon Liu and Wong Yue. Prince Master Wang loves himself some wine and jewels. But when Wang takes a trip to the floating brothel he crosses paths with the a troublesome jewel thief, Dirty Ho, and things start getting a little kung-fu crazy. Come get a little dirty with us and listen to this episode of The Clueless Critic and get to know some Dirty Ho.

Targets is a 1968 thriller directed by Peter Bogdanovich in his (almost) theatrical directorial debut, and starring Tim O'Kelly, Boris Karloff, Nancy Hsueh, Bogdanovich, James Brown, Arthur Peterson and Sandy Baron. The film depicts Bobby Thompson, a young man who goes off on an unexpected killing spree. Coming on the heels of the assassinations of Martin Luther King Jr. and Robert F. Kennedy in the summer of 1968, the film mostly failed at the box office. Come see why it's worth a watch now more than ever in this Marsonet pick on The Clueless Critic.

Some Folks Call It a Sling Blade is a 1993/1994 short film (29 minutes) written by Billy Bob Thornton and directed by George Hickenlooper. It stars Thornton, Molly Ringwald, Brent Williams and J. T. Walsh. It was later adapted into the 1996 feature film Sling Blade, also starring Thornton, which won Thornton the Academy Award for Best Adapted Screenplay, as well as a nomination for Best Actor in a Leading Role. Thornton plays Karl Childers, an intellectually disabled man who has been in a mental hospital for the past 25 years for a grisly incident. Karl Childers is parodied by Eric Cartman in an episode of South Park. Come join us and we get into this weird little gem of a short movie and find out about my personal bizarre connection to this little flick.

Funny Pages is a quirky offbeat off-kilter cringy black comedy film written, directed, and edited by Owen Kline. Why did we love this film and what's it got to to with Spike of Bensonhurst, The King of Comedy, and The Lobster? Grab a wooden stool and pop a squat by your wireless as we launch into this A24 gem shot on 16mm (Riley pick)

Picnic at Hanging Rock is a 1975 Australian mystery/horror/arthouse film directed by the man who did The Truman Show, Peter Weir. It was adapted from the 1967 novel of the same name by Joan Lindsay. The plot involves the perplexing disappearance of 3 college girls during a picnic at Hanging Rock. Picnic at Hanging Rock drew international attention to the Australian New Wave of cinema. Australia! It's not just Crocodile Dundee and boomerangs after all! Come get your Aussie on and have a listen to our episode "Picnic at Hanging Rock (1975) Peter Weir"

Omar is a 2013 Palestinian drama film directed by Hany Abu-Assad. It was screened at the 2013 Cannes Film Festival where it won the Special Jury Prize. Omar is a Palestinian baker who frequently scales a 35 foot wall on the West Bank barrier to visit his girlfriend, Nadia, a girl he hopes to marry. Omar and his childhood friends, Tarek and Amjad, have been preparing for attacks on soldiers. The pace of this movie picks up quickly and never lets up and ends in one of the most perfect moments to ever be captured on film. Listen to why we think Hany Abu-Assad beat Hollywood at its own game.

This episode we take a look at the 1982 British drama film written and directed by Jerzy Skolimowski. It is set at the time of the Solidarity protests in Poland. It stars Jeremy Irons as Nowak, a Polish builder leading a team renovating a house illegally in London. It won the best Screenplay at Cannes and it was Gene Siskel's favorite movie of 1982. It is also currently scoring a 100% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. But who cares what those numbskulls have to say about it. Have a listen and get our take on Moonlighting right here and now on The Clueless Critic. (Fun fact: Hans Zimmer's first movie score....)

Lost Horizon is a 1937 American adventure drama fantasy film directed by Frank Capra. The screenplay by Robert Riskin is based on the 1933 novel of the same name by James Hilton. Come join us as we talk about the most expensive film ever made based on the first book to ever be mass marketed. What happened to all that lost footage? Why did Capra go cry in his car? And who are the Gen Z kids shipping in this movie? Watch this amazing Frank Capra film, have a listen to our blundering banter, and don't take any wooden nickels.

Zazie dans le Métro is a 1960 French film directed by Louis Malle based on the book by Raymond Queneau. Surreal? Dada? Looney Tunes? Monty-Python? The Muppets? How do you describe this film? And how on earth did this come from a novel to begin with? And what kind of crazy person thought they could film this unfilmable bewildering masterpiece? This movie is stock full of strange moments and plays like a film directed by a circus ringmaster. This hot potato is overloaded with a barrage of quick cuts, gags, film magic, and oddities that will have your head spinning - hopefully in a pleasing way. Zazie just wants to ride on the metro, but if the adult world won't let her do that she'll cut through all the bullshit and find her own adventures. Come dissect this weird film with us as we take a look at the meaning behind the madness, or lack thereof. SPECIAL BONUS: This episode includes a new section called "You've got mail". We got some surprising feedback from the world of Ken Russell. Have a listen to this episode of "The Clueless Critic" with Kevin, John, and Raph.

Mikey and Nicky is a 1976 American drama written and directed by the fabulous Elaine May. It stars John Cassavetes as a desperate small-time mobster and Peter Falk (Columbo himself) as his longtime, childhood friend. The supporting cast features Ned Beatty, Carol Grace, Emmet Walsh and Sanford Meisner of the Meisner Method acting technique fame. Join us as we dive into the career of Elaine May, the oddity of making this film, and the story of how a brilliant comedian and visionary director got the nickname of Mrs. Hitler. This episode now available on this random-time-interval of The Clueless Critic.

"Sorcerer" depicts four lowlifes from varied backgrounds meeting in a South American oil-company village, where they volunteer to transport cargoes of aged, poorly kept dynamite that is so unstable that it is 'sweating' its dangerous basic ingredient, nitroglycerin. If you've never heard of this movie it might be because of that terrible title. That title is almost as bad as C.H.U.D. or Blackenstein. But at least with Blackenstein you have a vague idea about what you are going to watch. Enough about the title! The real story is how amazing this film is and how it was essentially swallowed by the release and popularity of Star Wars. Be one of the lucky ones and watch this great film and join us in our drunken banter on The Clueless Critic.

A pure joy. A delightful film. Magic. Yes, Alec Guinness slays it as nine different characters. But a lot of the magic is coming form the star Dennis Price as he masterfully sets the tone of the whole film and gets us to root for this murderous duke in this dark comedy. Find out why this gem strikes our hearts and may be my favorite film thus far featured on The Clueless Critic.

Woof! Kevin's education into film gets extremely dark as Raph gravitates toward the hard-core horror he finds so titillating. I'll never complain about Spike of Bensonhurst again! A must see film for horror fans, this weird little Turkish gem delivers a terrifying spiral into darkness and shares the awesome presence of the amazing Mehmet Cerrahoglu (devil-guy?) with the world. This film may just turn your stomach or turn you on to the horror genre forever. Join us, weirdos, as we dive into the hellscape in "BASKIN"!

Why did John make us watch this movie? Why, John, why? Listen and find out why and how this film found a special place in John Riley's heart. Also, if you are playing the drinking game at home. Drink a shot every time John says the word "Communists!"

Dario Argento's debut film has been credited with popularizing the Italian giallo genre. Hop aboard the giallo train with us as we give our take on The Bird with the Crystal Plumage.

Umm, what?

He's swimming across some pools. Why on Earth?

In our second episode John A. Riley takes a sharp turn away from the chaotic Roar film that Raphael Marsonet delivered in our first episode. We have a masterful director, Ken Russell, deliver the compelling story of composer Frederick Delius and his amanuensis Eric Fenby. How did a black-and-white made-for-tv-movie end up as a beloved gem? Listen and find out. Also Riley drops a great story of his personal run-in with this legendary director that you won't want to miss. The Clueless Critic outro music was written by the musician, Homeless Sky.

Roar shows up in a lot of oddball movie lists. It is often hailed as the most dangerous movie ever made and it uses the tagline "No animals were harmed in the making of this film. 70 cast and crew members were". We dive into these claims and question what possessed Noel Marshall to carry through with this decade long pet project that put his life and his entire family's life quite literally on the line.

Here's the skinny on The Clueless Critic. A Yankee, a Brit, and an Aussie watch weird films. You the listener get assigned a film to watch every episode and we meet back and discuss. That's it. It's like a book club for lazy people. But movies nobody watches.