History Go Time!

Why do people seem to think that the library of Alexandria was the only library in the ancient world?

In 1938 the German pharmaceutical company Temmler patented the drug Pervitin. In 1939 the Germans conquered…a lot of places. These two events may be linked. We do all of that to get to the story of Aimo Koivunen, the Finnish soldier who makes John Belushi look like Jim Belushi.

The infamous story about Horus and Set. You asked for this. I cannot stress enough - you asked for this. This was originally a bonus show for Medicis, but now everyone gets to suffer psychic damage.

You wanted it, be careful what you wish for. Pointing out all of the historical inaccuracies in Gladiator 2 actually took twice as long as Gladiator 2.

The song isn't problematic, the interpretation is. Here's why we shouldn't judge the past by the mores of today. I promise this is the last 'people are being wrong on the internet' for a while.

Most of what you read on the internet is false. Not this, of course, but other things. Here's why every time you see 'did you know that word came from an acronym' is always wrong.

Cambyses, son of Cyrus, goes a little bit insane. Bardiya, other son of Cyrus, gets eaten by an evil wizard. Darius, future emperor of Persia, finds interesting uses for horses. That's as much as the censors will let me say.

I try not to do Halloween but you keep dragging me back in. This one is from the paid archives, now everyone can have a taste. It's about Victorian era crazy, urban legends, the Duke of Wellington, and the origin of the term 'painting the town red.'

One of my favourite shows from years ago disappeared off the internet, probably due to wizards. Instead of simply uploading it again, I decided to redo the whole thing from the ground up. Which is possibly why it's two shows now. This is all about the Achaemenid Persian Empire. We look at how advanced they were, how awesome Cyrus was, and somehow once again manage to find a way to disrespect Sparta. It's a talent.

In honour of International Talk Like A Pirate Day we explore why pirates didn't actually sound like that, and also how, technically, every day is Talk Like A Pirate Day

I didn't know why jacks in a deck of cards were jacks. Join me for a tumble down the rabbit hole. The other hour is a bunch of random history stuff you'll probably enjoy, loosely bound by this flimsy conceit.

Random trivia from the modern Olympics. Bizarre sports (poodle grooming, pretending to be a corpse), event disruptions (four person pileup, evil leprechaun), and numerous unfortunate things happening to pigeons. Why is it only every four years?

The Second Intermediate Period of Egypt. Or that time when people who weren't Egyptian took over and they don't really like talking about it.

A Musashi show As requested by many Show notes in haiku

Here's a Valentine's gift for everyone. One of the bonus shows is now available for all. This is all about Stuxnet, the most amazing computer virus you may not have heard about. You need to be wearing fingerless gloves to get the most out of this show.

I've been going through some stuff lately, and as part of the healing process I thought I'd do an interstitial bonus show. This is going to be a little bit different, but it should be plenty fun. Here's the unbelievably true story of Fine Cotton.

We finish up the Hannibal series in one go because Damo went mad. Everything from the fallout of Trebia to Cannae to Hannibal inventing snake bombs to Carthage being wiped out. You may have to hit the pause button a couple of times.

Hannibal marches on Rome, it turns out that story takes a while to tell. Due to ADHD there are side stories about ancient sieges and why Roman names are so weird. This is going to be more than one sitting, so be warned.

This one is eventually about Hamilcar Barca, the Carthaginian John Wick. He comes in at around the 2-hour mark. I've taken your feedback that the Tik Tok generation wants shorter episodes and I have determined that it is the children who are wrong.

You asked, I delivered. We're going to be heading back into the dreaded continuity with a multi-part series detailing the Punic Wars. This first episode has very little Punic Wars, but it's necessary homework, so I tried to add more spice. This is the Way.

Thomas Midgley Jr came close to destroying the world with his invention of CFCs, but we managed to survive. This time he's back to finish the job. Because why have one planet-ending invention when you can have two? Here's the story about how the same guy also invented leaded gasoline and somehow managed to be even deadlier the second time around.

In which we finally learn why 'fridge' has a 'D' in it but 'refrigerator' doesn't. Oh, and quite a bit about the end of the world too, with history's biggest killer - Thomas Midgley Jr.

This was a Patreon exclusive for a while, but it's Christmas! (Or whatever holiday you choose to celebrate. Me, I'm more of a Saturnalia guy, but you do you.) Paranormal curses from the void between stars are surprisingly common in the sport of baseball. This show will explore the spectrum from the relatively benign "Curse of the Bambino" to the downright freaky "Curse of the Colonel". Yes, that Colonel. The chicken guy.

The 1904 St Louis Olympic Marathon: 32 people started the race, only 14 finished. And the guy in the thumbnail is running in a chopped-down business suit and a beret. You'd like to know more, wouldn't you?

Has the hysteria calmed down yet? I hope so. Here's 90 minutes of why Queen Elizabeth II was not a good person. Not in the slightest. I can't wait for the comment section on this one.

It's well past time we took a torch to this throne of lies. Why (almost) everything you ever knew about diamonds is a lie told as a part of the greatest con ever perpetrated.

In which I make a very extended case for why imperial measurements are stupid, why metric is objectively better, we go into the surprisingly fascinating history of paper sizes, and I explain why every eagle you've ever listened to has lied to you.

Featuring 6-10, in no particular order, on the arbitrary top-ten list of women who don't get as much attention as they deserve. We've got the greatest pirate you've never heard of, Civil War James Bond, a horny monarch, an overrated general, and one person who - if not for gender stereotypes - would have made Mars colonies possible by now.

This is a rebroadcast of a show from 2020 (with some additional commentary) explaining the origins of the phrase Vae Victis - woe to the vanquished. Coincidentally, Damo is also doing a live show at the Sydney Comedy Festival also called Vae Victis, so if you're wondering why it might behove you to give this a listen.  (If you're looking for tickets to the live show head to Ticketek or sydneycomedyfest.com)

This show is all about the 51% of history that deserves a bit more attention. We're going to be looking at some of the perhaps lesser-known women in history who were utterly awesome. And let's all pretend that it actually came out during Women In History Month. “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” ~Douglas Adams

In a new segment for HGT we explore current events and try and get to the bottom of the Russo-Ukraine conflict. If you've asked why, where, what, or huh this is the show for you.

We've all done it. You try to fix a broken toaster with a radioactive isotope next thing you know you're hurtling backwards through time. Well, this doesn't have to ruin your day. In fact, there are a number of ways you can leverage your unique situation for fun and profit. Let Damo provide you with a friendly guide to becoming the most important person in history.

It's the classic question, isn't it? If you had a time machine, would you go back and kill Hitler? In this show we explore why that hypothetical isn't as clear cut as it might sound, we learn just how crazy Hitler was and why whatever you thought was way shy of the mark, and we take a sidebar to introduce people to the bizarre lunatic that was bestselling author Karl May.

In which we celebrate the fabulous holiday tradition of Krampus - the terrifying German hell-monster who comes on December 5th to drag naughty children to a twisted hell dimension of infinite pain in a festive Lament Configuration. Happy Holidays!

A brief history of the worst smell ever in the history of mankind (unless you count my dog). Also a dive into why "Dickensian" is "Dickensian", I run out of metaphors for bodily expulsion, and I subvert expectations by never once using the Ruben Rabasa "stinky!" soundbite.

He ruled the Russian land and never mind the CzarBut the kazachok he danced really wunderbarIn all affairs of state he was the man to pleaseBut he was real great when he had a girl to squeezeFor the queen he was no wheeler dealerThough she'd heard the things he'd doneShe believed he was a holy healerWho would heal her son

The people who support this show on Patreon, the real heroes, they get some really cool stuff. Like bonus shows full of ideas that might be considered too niche, like a brief history of paint. Which is a tale that contains way more proto-German mad scientists than you're probably expecting.  The people of Patreon were generous enough and thought this show was interesting enough, to share with the rest of the world. Consider this to be a teaser, a taster, a 'first hit is free' trial run of the awesome stuff you have access to if you help keep the HGT lights on.

That's great it starts with an earthquake, spears shake, a hydroplane, and Mycenae is not okay. It's the end of the Bronze Age as we know it (and I feel fine)

The rule of threes applies here - this is the third of the Khan trilogy, and it is fittingly three hours of Mongol intrigue and interest, from Ogedai to Kublai. Plus we delve into some weird side tangents like the 1979 Eurovision song contest, Christian sectarianism, and why the Great Wall wasn't built to keep the rabbits out.

Genghis Khan declares "Mission Accomplished" in the Middle East and sends two of his greatest generals, Subutai and Jebe, off to Europe to introduce themselves. They accidentally almost conquer it, before they remember they're not supposed to. It's a cracking yarn, stay a while and listen.

You wanted it, you got it. This one's all about Genghis Khan. You'll go where he goes, defile what he defiles, eat who he eats.

Kick the tyres and light the fires, this one is all about the space race! Yuri Gagarin's adolescent Nazi hunt, plenty of accent work, and what Neil Armstrong didn't want you to know!

“The last capitalist we hang shall be the one who sold us the rope.” - Karl Marx. Damo, in his role as public prosecutor, outlines his arguments as to why such a sentence is necessary in a detailed analysis of the (Dodd) frankly terrifying number of times Wall Street has broken the entire world. Cash Rules Everything Around Me, get the money, dolla dolla bill y'all.

In the epic conclusion to the chess saga, there's neuroscience, plenty of KGB crazy shenanigans, a robot duck, and an international chess champion on the run from Johnny Law - plus a surprise cameo from Nature Boy Ric Flair. Woooo!

Due to the popularity of the Queen's Gambit and one of the rare times Damo actually enjoyed a popular television show, this is everything you didn't know you wanted to know about chess.

In which we explore some historical misconceptions and come to the sad realisation that not only does the truth not matter, perhaps it never did.

In this exhaustive episode, we look at Ultra, Enigma, Garbo, Mincemeat and other seemingly random words that had a big effect on the second world war.

A little exploration into why we have leap years. And a lot about Julius Caesar's rebellion, the civil war, and the butterfly effect of one person not knowing the date.

19th-century actors were hardcore. In this episode, we explore how John Wilkes Booth may not have been the craziest person in his family, how a dispute over who was the better Macbeth ended with dozens of deaths, and how this one event was the Kevin Bacon of its time - almost everyone makes an appearance, from Davy Crockett to Charles Dickens

According to China he's regarded as second only to Sun Tzu, who literally wrote the book on war. According to historians, most of the stories about him never actually happened. According to HGT these stories are way too cool to ignore. We explore the man, the myth, the legend - Zhuge Liang: absolutely a statesman, definitely a general, possibly a wizard, and maybe the incarnate avatar of the God of Rock.

Marcus Licinius Crassus - one of the first Triumvirate. Richest man in Rome. Conquerer of Spartacus. And also, upon his death, the first person in recorded history ever to be turned into a muppet. This is the story of how one of the most powerful people in Roman history became a prop in touring Greek theatre troupe.