Rekindling Relationships

Couples therapy isn't just for struggling relationships! Even happy couples can benefit from working with a therapist. Therapists can help couples; Communicate better, feel safe and heard, understand each other better, resolve conflicts, face life's challenges together and be better listeners.  Bec and Vern explore the most Googled questions about Couples and Therapy in this episode, using insights from their own work mentoring couples. 

Society often sends mixed signals about what emotions are "acceptable" for men. We might be told it's okay to feel angry, but discouraged from expressing it outwardly. We're encouraged to be vulnerable, yet pressured to be tough. It's no wonder navigating mental health can be so complicated! Therapy can help Men navigate the emotional terrain of relationships and family life, manage anxiety and anger, as well as improve their physical and mental health.   In this episode, Bec asks Vern all the Googled questions about Men and Therapy and they discuss why they believe that talking and processing your emotions is good for you. 

Bec and Vern chat once again (after a well deserved break) about the assumptions that come up in relationships. We discuss how couples tend to assume that they know how their partner  communicates and understands them and these assumptions can lead to miscommunications and disagreements.    Check us out on Facebook and YouTube or on our Website 

Intimacy is an important part of being in a relationship and the lack of it can create many issues for couples. In this series, Bec and Vern explore 7 aspects of Intimacy they feel is essential for those wanting to create a deeper connection. In this episode, the final one of the series, we discuss how to create more Passion in our relationships. As well as bringing more affection into our daily lives together, we examine the value of communication and asking questions of your partner as well as carving out time together.

Intimacy is an important part of being in a relationship and the lack of it can create many issues for couples. In this series, Bec and Vern explore 7 aspects of Intimacy they feel is essential for those wanting to create a deeper connection. We discuss how to use vulnerability, roleplay, making noises and talking dirty to bring more pleasure into our intimate space.

Intimacy is an important part of being in a relationship and the lack of it can create many issues for couples. In this series, Bec and Vern explore 7 aspects of Intimacy they feel is essential for those wanting to create a deeper connection. Our 5th episode in this series is on Presence and we discuss how we can use our senses, breath and techniques such as edging to be bring more awareness in our intimate space.

Intimacy is an important part of being in a relationship and the lack of it can create many issues for couples. In this series, Bec and Vern explore 7 aspects of Intimacy they feel is essential for those wanting to create a deeper connection. In this episode Intimacy 104 – Patience, we delve into how slowing things down and taking more time with our partner can improve intimacy in life and in the bedroom.

Intimacy is an important part of being in a relationship and the lack of it can create many issues for couples. In this series, Bec and Vern explore 7 aspects of Intimacy they feel is essential for those wanting to create a deeper connection. In our third part of this series, we discuss the importance of Process and how when we deal with our emotions and heal past experiences and trauma, we are better able to be more intimate with our partner.

Intimacy is an important part of being in a relationship and the lack of it can create many issues for couples. In this series, Bec and Vern explore 7 aspects of Intimacy they feel is essential for those wanting to create a deeper connection. In Intimacy 102, we discuss Pornography and how it can damage our intimate connection, distract us from properly relating and desensitize us from our physical bodies.

Intimacy is an important part of being in a relationship and the lack of it can create many issues for couples. In this series, Bec and Vern explore 7 aspects of Intimacy they feel is essential for those wanting to create a deeper connection. The first in this series regards Pressure and how we must prioritize the relationship despite the pressures of life. By focusing on our partner and our connection we can find support to deal with the daily pressures.

Bec and Vern discuss more Tricky Questions from social media including; what to do if your partner doesn't want to go deeper in the relationship, what to say if they still have pictures of the ex on their phone, and how do you broach the subject of a marijuana habit. We also explore why your partner contacts their ex when they have been drinking and why husbands might not be as worried as you want them to be.    Check out our other episodes and please message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern  Thanks for listening!

In this episode of Tricky Questions, Bec and Vern discuss how to convince your partner to be more kinky, middle aged virgins who live with their parents, being an independent adult, Snowflake Mountain and what do you do if your new partner doesn't like your kids.  Check out our other episodes and please message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern  Thanks for listening!

In our continuing exploration of books related to Intimacy, Bec and Vern interview Thomas Jordan Ph.D., a New York City psychologist/psychoanalyst, who has been studying and treating unhealthy love lives for more than 30 years. He also founded the Love Life Learning Centre website to better support couples.   Through studying the psychological ability to form and sustain healthy love relationships as well as treating the ways people unwittingly repeat the love life disappointments they have learned from their past unhealthy relationship experiences, he has written a fascinating book - 'Learn to Love'. In this book he explains what we learn about love relationships, how they interfere with our current lives and describes his formula of stopping the cycle of repeating unhealthy experiences.   Learn to Love: Guide to Healing Your Disappointing Love Life https://lovelifelearningcenter.com/    Check out our other episodes and please message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern    Thanks for listening!  

In this episode, Bec and Vern interview Laura Doyle about the 6 Intimacy Skills that she outlines in her book, 'The Empowered Wife'. We have a fun and lively chat about the importance of Self-care, Respect, Relinquishing control, being able to Receive, as well as Gratitude and Vulnerability.   Laura is the founder of the international relationship coach training school Laura Doyle Connect, the Creator of The Ridiculously Happy Wife program, host of The Empowered Wife Podcast and a New York Times Best Selling author. You can find out more about her work here- https://lauradoyle.org/    Check out our other episodes and please message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern  Thanks for listening!

Bec and Vern discuss tricky social media questions about fears and fetishes, introverts and intimacy. They explore how to ask for what you want and the importance of not taking our partners, friends and family for granted. We also find out why Bec does not liked to be tickled.  Check out our other episodes and please message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern  Thanks for listening!

Bec and Vern discuss and answer a diverse range of tricky social media questions. This includes; do age differences matter, why should you schedule date nights, attachment theory and sabotaging relationships, if once a cheater is always a cheater, and how to respond when your partner says your friend is more beautiful than you.  Hope you are enjoying our new format for 2022. Check out our other episodes and please message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern  Thanks for listening!

Bec and Vern continue to answer those tricky social media questions about faking orgasms, hangry dates, sexual meals and how old is too old to date. Hope you are enjoying our new format for 2022. Check out our other episodes and please message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern  Thanks for listening!

This episode was recorded live at a Rekindling Relationships Podcast in a Park event in Bendigo. Bec and Vern are joined by local sexologist Linda Kirkman and a live audience for a fun evening of random questions, useful information and strange prizes. Listen to find out how to get over an ex, why kissing is good for you, how many different types of orgasms there are, and why does Linda have a bag of 3D printed clitorises? We hope you enjoy this episode and please send us any of your own questions to www.facebook.com/becandvern  Check us out on YouTube and at https://rekindlingrelationships.com/

Bec and Vern answer those tricky social media questions about racist mothers, low sex drives and selfies.  Hi everyone, we are starting 2022 with a new format. We really hope you like it. Please let us know what you think and message us any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern  Thanks for listening!

Bec and Vern look to social media to find some interesting relationship questions to answer in our new format for 2022. We hope you enjoy this season and please send any questions or comments to https://www.facebook.com/becandvern . 

Is it time to say goodbye? Are you at a crossroads? Are you avoiding talking about it? Bec and Vern discuss how to have this very hard conversation about parting ways and why doing it can make you both happier. We believe that good healthy communication is the key to a great relationship and that with practice and patience everyone can be better at it. Check us out on Facebook and YouTube. https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Trauma affects many of us. In our past and also in our present. Identifying how it is impacting your life and communicating this with your partner can helps us process this pain and build a more loving relationship as we heal together. In this episode, Bec and Vern discuss how to be supportive of someone dealing with past trauma, whether it's your partner or yourself. We believe that good healthy communication is the key to a great relationship and that with practice and patience everyone can be better at it. Check us out on Facebook and YouTube. https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Disagreements are common and normal in a relationship. However, after dealing with conflict we need to take the time to come together to repair upsets and hurts. Bec and Vern talk about how important this is for your relationship and why it's worth learning how to do it better.  We believe that good healthy communication is the key to a great relationship and that with practice and patience everyone can be better at it. Check us out on Facebook and YouTube. https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Are you sick of arguing about the same thing with your partner over and over again? Has stonewalling, avoidance or yelling become the norm in your relationship? Conflict is a normal in a relationship but there are better ways to do it. Bec and Vern discuss ways to manage these battles with more respect, openness and patience, so that they actually strengthen our relationships. We believe that good healthy communication is the key to a great relationship and that with practice and patience everyone can be better at it. Check us out on Facebook and YouTube. https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Would you like your intimate space to be more deeply connected and way more fun? Would you like to speak more openly about sex with your partner? Would you like to have more sex? It's all about using your mouth and having better conversations. Bec and Vern chat about how we can shake our awkwardness, be more vulnerable, and ask for what we want in our intimate lives so that we can have joyful and connected intimate spaces. We believe that good healthy communication is the key to a great relationship and that with practice and patience everyone can be better at it. Check us out on Facebook and YouTube. https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Something has happened. It has affected you and your relationship. Trust has been broken. What now? Bec and Vern discuss how to use communication, honesty and patience to rebuild trust so that you can feel safe again. We believe that good healthy communication is the key to a great relationship and that with practice and patience everyone can be better at it. Check us out on Facebook and YouTube. https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Have you disconnected from your partner? Have work or kids taken priority over your relationship? Maybe a decline in mental or physical health has created withdrawal or distance? In this first episode- Using Communication to Reconnect, Bec and Vern discuss reasons why couples disconnect and how we can better communicate to reconnect with each other. We talk about using these important conversations to bring us closer. We believe that good healthy communication is the key to a great relationship and that with practice and patience everyone can be better at it. Check us out on Facebook and YouTube. https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In the final episode in this series, Bec and Vern chat about the solid foundation that can exist when the other phases have been moved through well. In this phase, new norms are now second nature and we have a shared history. How do we get to this stage of resolution where we all feel deeply connected and supported?  Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

By Phase 6, we are learning to accept our new blended family and our place in it. Bec and Vern discuss how we can support each other and our children to more fully embrace this new way of life. How do deal with the apprehension that can exist in separated families? How do we move forward together with love? Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern talk about this middle Phase, one of action where we are moving forward as a family unit. How do we form new routines and set new boundaries in this space? How do we celebrate together? How do we work together so that everyone has a role to play in the family? Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In Phase 4, conflict naturally rears its head and Bec and Vern chat about how we can deal with it appropriately and effectively. Parents may wonder if they can make this new family arrangement work. As we openly air our differences, how do we stay connected so that the whole family can move forward? How do we use conflict to grow the family? Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In this phase there is a recognition of painful family dynamics and the tension that is created by this. Bec and Vern discuss how normal this is for blended families. How do we deal with sibling rivalries? How do we ensure that everyone in the house feels included and involved? Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In episode 2, Bec and Vern explore what happens when reality hits and emotions in the household can run high. How do we navigate this phase of deeper immersion into our blended family? Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In this first episode of this series - 7 Phases of Blended/Step families, Bec and Vern discuss the fantasy phase where everything is new and exciting and nothing can possibly go wrong. How do we recognize this phase as well as realise that it is a dream? How do we prepare for the reality? Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Have you ever been to Couples Counselling or therapy? Do you feel it helped you in your relationship? Would you like to find a fun and different way to connect with your partner? In this Podcast, Bec and Vern have a chat with a couple from Bendigo who participated in one of their creative workshops. After exposing their fears to each other by writing them on a wall, we supported Ayrlea and Kayla to create a mural over these fears to demonstrate their new understanding of each other.  Also check out the YouTube video of this workshop - https://youtu.be/2vfZPoKfqO0 Check out our website to find out more about us and what we do: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ or find us on our socials: https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

The final episode in our series about issues with intimacy focusses more on the medical problems that can occur in relationships. Bec and Vern discuss how couples can deal with the psychological and physical impacts relating to sexual dysfunction that can interfere with our connection.  What are the problems that can occur and how do we support each other to stay close and deal with these issues? How can we be intimate without being intimate?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern consider what causes another issue with intimacy, sexual disagreement. In this episode, we explore what these disagreements are and how they can begin. How do these disputes affect our relationships and how do we deal with them? How can we move past the conflict that inevitably occurs in partnership with another?    Check out our website or socials to find out more:https://rekindlingrelationships.com/https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Another issue with intimacy is sexual disinterest and in this episode Bec and Vern talk about how this can impact our relationships. How does parenting, work and busy lifestyles influence our sexual desires and what can we do about it? How do we deal with the pressures in our lives to reconnect with each other? How do we prioritise our relationship so that we can enjoy sex more?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern discuss issues of intimacy around sexual disappointment. This can look like routine or one sided sex or even disconnected sex. How do couples deal with a mismatch in their sexual drives? How do we deal with issues around performance? We discuss how drugs, alcohol and stress can affect our libidos and what sort of conversations we need to have to move forward together.    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In the 3rd of our episodes relating to issues of intimacy, Bec and Vern explore sexual disapproval. This disapproval can come from dissatisfaction and disconnection, which can then lead to distrust and shame. How common is it and what can we do about it in our relationships? How does the feeling of expectation attached to sex create issues around this? Why do we need to communicate more about where we are at to counter this?  Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Continuing on with 7 issues of Intimacy, Bec and Vern discuss Sexual Disconnection and how this impacts our relationships. Withdrawing, lack of sex and romance, avoidance and rejection are all issues to do with disconnection. What creates this disconnection and how can we take responsibility to fix this and grow our relationship?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In this series based on 7 Issues of Intimacy, Bec and Vern begin by exploring Sexual Dissatisfaction. We talk about what it is and how we can deal with it. Do you feel like there is something missing or doesn't feel right in your relationship? Do you feel like you are not getting your needs met? How can we feel more sexually satisfied with our partner and in our relationship?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern complete the 7 stages of a Relationship with the final one Stage 7, Completion. This is the stage of mature intimacy and deep connection for couples who have successfully navigated the last 6 stages. This is when we have plenty of time for each other and know each other well. How do we set ourselves up for enjoying our golden age together in the future? How do we make love last?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern explore Stage 6 in the 7 stages of a Relationship, Crisis. This can be a mid-life crisis where we feel unfulfilled or bored, nostalgic or even impulsive. Crisis could also relate to a major health problem, loss of family or career, financial issues or other major life-shaking event. If we have navigated the other Stages of a relationship well, then we will have better support at this stage to manage these issues. How do we ensure that we properly sustain our relationship to manage crisis?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In Stage 5 of the 7 stages of a Relationship, Bec and Vern chat about Cooperation. Couples begin to work together building a life, establishing a family, creating projects and future plans. In this stage, couples can begin take each other for granted and feel disconnected. How do we ensure that we prioritise our relationship so that we don't lose sight of why we got together in the first place.    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern discuss Stage 4, Commitment, in the 7 stages of a Relationship.  This stage is where we have a new understanding of our partner. Trust is built and both partners create a solid and safe foundation together. How do we create this deeper commitment with each other?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

In Stage 3, Bec and Vern explore Conflict, one of the trickiest of the 7 stages of a Relationship. Power struggles, differences of opinion, self interest and frustration can sabotage a relationship. How do we effectively navigate disagreements? How is dealing with conflict one of the most important skills that we can learn in our relationship?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern discuss Stage 2 of the 7 stages of a Relationship, Discovery. In this stage we might realise that our partner is fallible and not as perfect as we once thought. To move through this stage we must learn to accept our partner as they are. How do we navigate understanding each other's needs and how to meet them?    Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

Bec and Vern explore the 7 stages of a Relationship, starting with Stage 1, Passion. This stage is the honeymoon stage of a relationship where romance and intense attraction connects a couple. Why is this stage so addictive? How do we look beyond the rose coloured glasses of this stage to see whether we are really suited together?  Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern 

What do you do when your sex drives don't match up? How do you find a balance so that everyone's intimate needs are met? How embarrassed will Bec get speaking about this topic? Bec and Vern discuss how to manage when you and your partner have different sex drives.  Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern   

Everyone brings their own values into a relationship. How do we navigate being together when we don't share each others? What's a Make or Break? What happens when we compromise our values to be with another person? Bec and Vern have a chat about how different values can impact our relationships.  Check out our website or socials to find out more: https://rekindlingrelationships.com/ https://www.facebook.com/becandvern    Some great resources on making relationships work for you to check out- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. By John Gottman https://amzn.to/3rTckDJ Eight Dates: To keep your relationship happy, thriving and lasting. By John Gottman https://amzn.to/3jRTBFO