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Are You Substituting the Pleasures of a Good Relationship with Food? with Roman Mironov Our relationships are such an important part of our life. Especially the intimate relationship, the one that we have with our romantic partner because when we feel good in the relationship, everything else basically falls into place. When we don't, let's say our relationship gets toxic. We tend to go to food and other addictions as a coping mechanism. About Roman I'm a relationship coach trained by Robbins Madanes, the official training center of Tony Robbins. I help clients create those beautiful moments in a relationship that you wish you could relive over and over. I teach you how to be grateful for your partner, respect them, and communicate effectively. www.romanmironov.com www.feedingfatty.com Full Transcript Below Are You Substituting the Pleasures of a Good Relationship with Food? with Roman Mironov   00:00:15 Roy Hello everybody. Welcome to another episode of feeding fatty. This is Roy. This is Terry. So we are the podcast. We are chronically in my journey through getting healthy, again, diet, exercise, change in mindset. So, we talk from time to time about the struggles and things that we do and Terry support for that. We also have, professionals as guests from time to come on and help us out. Give us some different viewpoints on things that we can do better to help us in this journey. Today is no different. Terry I'll let you introduce Roman. 00:00:50 Terry Yeah. Roman Marinov is a relationship coach trained by Robbins. Madanes the official training center of Tony Robbins. He helps clients create beautiful moments in a relationship that you wish you could relive over and over. He teaches you how to be grateful for your partner, respect them and communicate effectively likes to help people realize there's a potential and to live a happy lifestyle. Roman, thank you for being on the show. Welcome. 00:01:20 Roman Well, Ryan Garrett, thank you so much. It's an honor. I'm very happy to be with you today. Thank you. 00:01:28 Roy Yeah. Because we explore, relationships, with our food, with exercise, with life, and then also, with each other, Terry is such a big part of, me getting her well, she's a big part of life, no, either way, but we worked together and she is very instrumental in helping me on this path to wellness. So, let's just talk about that. What, how do relationships, affect things like are eating motivation, things like that. 00:02:05 Roman Oh, they actually affect them a lot because our relationships is such an important part of our life. Especially the intimate relationship, the one that we have with our romantic partner, because when we feel good in the relationship, everything else basically falls into place. When we don't, let's say our relationship gets toxic. We tend to go to food and other addictions as a coping mechanism. 00:02:38 Roy Okay. Yeah. I think it's two fold because for me, sometimes I can be driven just the other ways that, we're excited, things are going good and it's always like, Hey, let's go out and celebrate and have something good to eat. That's all it's like to celebrate. One thing that we're trying to, work hard on or, the, I guess, relating to different things as, food triggers, not only in our relationship, but work in life. It's just that, instead of having everything as a celebration point to run out and, eat some really good food, we're trying to change that to like maybe go do five pushups or do an exercise, do something physical instead of going for that food. 00:03:28 Roman Yeah, exactly. That's why when I celebrate, I made sure not to celebrate for food because it really only adds to the addiction. We're talking about addictions makes us stronger. It makes the neural pathways between food and pleasure is stronger in your mind. Right. 00:03:49 Roy Yeah. I think, we had a guest on this last week and were talking about some things that, and we try to look back in our past that relationships that we've had and things that have happened. And, I've been very fortunate that I have, I had an awesome childhood adulthood, life has just been very good for me. I'm blessed and couldn't ask for more, but the one thing that we kind of uncovered this last week was, ice cream. And, my relationship with that, as far as it being that celebratory mechanism that, as growing up, I had two grandpas that whenever anything, if were working, it'd be like, let's go down. You know, you worked really hard today. Let's go celebrate with some ice cream. Of course, taking a break, like my dad, when I'd go to work with them, we'd be like, oh, let's take a break and run over to dairy queen and get this. 00:04:47 Roy It's interesting that, while I never really thought about it until this week that I've carried that around in life with me, not necessarily as a negative, that something went bad and that's what triggers, but actually mainly that may be just the opposite. It was such a positive experience that, as cream is my thing that I've gotta be very careful with. 00:05:18 Roman Yes, yes. I know it makes a lot of sense. You associated again associated tons of pleasure with ice cream. Right. And that's when, right. When you want to feel great, now we just go to ice cream. Right. 00:05:33 Terry Also with your relationship with your grandparents, just anybody that you're thinking about that you had that celebratory mode with, it's like, it brings up good feelings, loving feelings with that. Yeah. 00:05:48 Roy It, and it carries over to, our spouse, our partner, because it's like, it, and it's not her not Terry's fault more me. I'm the one, I'm the trigger. It'd be like, oh, we had such a good day today. Let's rush out and get something to eat. Anyway, definitely something that we've been working on is to try to find, and maybe it's just as simple as let's go take a walk instead of, making food that focal point. 00:06:14 Terry To make a nachos at one o'clock in the morning, like we did a few months ago. Right. 00:06:21 Roy What are some other things that we can do to strengthen those relationships? And I, I, I'm assuming that this applies not only to our loved ones, but the relationships that we build with our families and coworkers and just, pretty much relationships in general. 00:06:41 Roman Yeah. That's a great question. I think you guys are a couple that's a great role model for me. I've been talking to you before and today, and I think that there was great energy between you and that's something that I definitely want to write and to be more specific, we need more communication. If you want to improve your relationship with the other person, remember that communication is the blood of the relationship. So, one thing to do is to make sure that you engage your partner in very deep conversations, not just shallow things about day to day stuff early into deeper emotions and feelings asked and how they feel and being asking very specific questions that also helps not just how are you, right? Yeah. How did you feel about that person saying that? Or how did you feel when you were in pain today? Those kinds of high quality questions? Another tip is to always be 100% present in the conversation. 00:07:54 Roman Make sure that you're not distracted by anything right. Gave that presence, that gift of your presence to your part. I will come in the eye be 100% there, especially if you are a man because women feminine women, they are very susceptible to this. Let's say the third tip is to make sure that you make your partner feel significant. You remind them that they are important to you. You praise them for every little thing. You make sure that they feel that they're appreciated because this is important. Yeah. Oftentimes we just take our partners for granted and we never gave them that praise or the feeling of significance. Yeah. 00:08:42 Terry Roy's really, Roy is really good at that. I mean, he D he tells me how grateful he is for me. I, I can't even tell countless times a day. I'm just like, oh me, I, I can't take a compliment. It's really hard for me to do. Yeah, 00:08:59 Roy Yeah. She is, I think it's an effort between both of us because she takes such good care of me in so many ways that it's like, Ooh, I've got to keep telling her not only because she is really awesome, but also because I don't want her to think I take it for granted or, those little bitty things that she does. I don't want her to think that they're unnoticed or overlooked. They're all just to me, the little things are as important as the big things. Probably more important day to day. 00:09:31 Roman Wow. That's some beautiful level of consciousness. Yeah. That's Tourette. Yeah. I can appreciate it. 00:09:40 Terry He's really good about it. He's also really good about trying to talk things out, trying to get to the root of causes, which I'm not like, I'll take care of him the way that I know how, and that's cooking and doing what I need to help make sure that he's being healthy and that I'm being healthy and all of that. I need to learn to verbalize that better. You have any tips on that? I mean, it's just hard. I don't know why it's so hard. 00:10:12 Roman Oh, that is such a huge shower for many women. And that, thank you. Thank you so much for sharing it. And let me tell you a bookstore. It, that is a great representation on this thing, that there is this marathon runner, a very popular athletes, rich role. He tells a story in his book. What basically happened is that he was going to get married to their girl and they have been dating for quite a long time. At one point they were living in different seats, let's say about two or three hours long away. At one point they were supposed to meet. She was supposed to come to him, but she said that she could, and that was about one month before their wedding. They were supposed to get married and well, he got upset and he said, okay, well, let me come to you. Let me drive. 00:11:16 Roman And she said, no, don't okay. So that was her first hand. Then they were doing the wedding rehearsal. She actually, she didn't want to do it. There was a lot of tension and basically what she was doing. She was showing him that she didn't want the marriage. The rehearsal went its way, but he actually was very anxious. He thought that she might not even show up during the way, but she did. She did. And they got married. And then they went to this honeymoon. I think it wasn't Hawaii or something like that. In that honeymoon, they were not talking to each other. They like, she was so angry that she had told him not to talk to her at all. So they were basically spanning it apart. At the end of the honeymoon, on the field day, he was fed up with it. He said, okay, so I can't take this anymore. 00:12:29 Roman We should just break up. And she said, okay. So he was very angry. They went home and they basically did not leave a day together as a couple, as a married couple. He went to talk to her friends. That's when he found out that she actually had someone else who was dating someone else at this point. The point of this story is that she was dropping hands to him all along the way, many hints, but she was not saying this directly. And he was not getting those hands. That's the point where the men, they don't like cans. They want direct information, direct commands, direct orders. They're basically a very simple in the sense. Yeah. 00:13:24 Terry Yeah. That's, that has been a big issue, huge issue between men and women, because we want men to get it. We want them to get it and you figure it out, but here's a couple of hints along the way. You just figure it out. I don't need to have to tell you, I don't know why that is. 00:13:42 Roy Well, and that's, and I'm that way, sometimes I have to tell Terry I'm getting something here, but let's just be very clear about it. Cause you know, yeah. Cause I mean, sometimes that receptors not always dialed in and most of the time, I mean, we've been together long enough and I think we care enough about each other that, a lot of that stuff comes through and maybe she says, oh, don't worry about it, but I know better. I need to, I need to be worrying about that. But, but it's like we're making a transition in our diet. I have been very quizzical quizzical about this to her to, because I want to know where, we talked about it, but I need to make sure that this is good for her as well as good for me. Trying to just set her down and ask her, how do you feel about this? Let's talk about it. 00:14:40 Roy Because I don't want, if it's not good for both of us, I don't want this to go on for a long time and in her be resentful because that's, what I see is what happens is one per one partner does something for the other and they have to keep doing it or it last over a period of time until they become very resentful of that. 00:15:05 Roman Yes, yes. That happens. I mean, you need to be careful about that before, so think or discuss before to take on such a commitment. Yeah. And any, no. What if you don't feel comfortable doing it anymore? It's okay to renegotiate. Exactly. 00:15:22 Roy Yeah. That's what I keep telling her, is this in, because I think it's, I think a lot of this can be generational just like with myself. When I was growing up, you went to work for a company and you stayed there for 30 years, you did this and you bought a house and you stayed there for your whole lifetime and, younger in life in my thirties that, I decided that, what, it's all right to change your mind as we grow. And as we develop things change. We have to be able to accept it, understand it, but we have to communicate. I mean, there's things that have changed in our relationship that I don't know what it is. I can't tell, but it's just, maybe a little thing that was like, Hey, I don't really like that too much. Right. This moment, not anymore. And, but instead of just either letting her continue to do it or, her doing it and me just, festering about it, that I don't like this that much anymore, just have a community, just talk about it. 00:16:30 Terry I like how you said, I like how you said you, how you give permission to renegotiate because we are so set and we just think we need to follow through, , 00:16:44 Roman That's right. That's right. That's the best example of how we need to keep communication lines open and the relationship. Even if something is bothering us, it's okay to say this. Just make sure that you say it in a loving way. Yeah. You find the right moment, that's it? 00:17:06 Roy Yeah. And it's easy to lash out. This is something that I have to be careful about because, do we work a lot? And so, we enjoy our work. We work a lot and sometimes things get tense, not necessarily between us, but more me like a process is breaking down. Something's not clicking. It's like when you have very limited time and you have a lot of things to do, if things tick off just perfect, you can get it done. And life is good. If there's one little glitch, then it throws everything out of balance. Unfortunately, Terry is the closest person and I don't ever want to lash out her. I had to be very careful about, Hey, what? I I'm having this problem. It's has nothing to do with you. I don't want it to run off on you. I, you know, I'm not that great. 00:18:01 Roy Not as good as I need to be about, well, number one, not letting it fester to get that way, but also, just making sure that she doesn't get the runoff from things, other things that are going on in life. 00:18:14 Roman Exactly. That's the correct word runoff. That's why they want to, you want to share what's on your mind very quickly. Not wait until it festers. Sure. 00:18:27 Terry Yeah. I mean, you do a good job at that. You you're very cognizant and I don't mean this to be the Roy and Terry show, but honestly you really, they really are very cognizant. I mean, hopefully at this juncture in our life, we've learned something along the way. I think we're really applying blind those lessons. 00:18:48 Roy Yeah. That's something else that, I feel fortunate enough about that. I just told her earlier that how, I was lucky to find her and we got together and, life has been good, but what, how difficult is this now at older ages or, I guess people coming together at an older age when they're very set in their ways they're set in their routines, I guess that makes it harder to mesh, to become a couple. 00:19:22 Roman Sometimes yes. Sometimes now, and no, because as people get mature, more mature, they actually become more patient. They become less selfish and they are more open to having a relationship that actually sustainable and not just about them, but they are ready to give more, even though it means that it might mean that they're not getting the same amount of love back. Yeah. That this transition, basically that happens over our lifetime from selfishness to selflessness, it helps relationships in older age. 00:20:08 Terry They know, I think we know more about ourselves, so we know what we want or what we like and can talk about that, can you express that? Not so well, like I'm doing now, but, we just know what to look for and know what that attraction is. 00:20:34 Roman Exactly. Exactly. Just, just like Roy was saying about his, wanting everything to be perfect. And if something doesn't go right. Even little thing, you might not be happy about it and this might show, so he knows himself very well. He's very cognizant then that's one good thing that comes from the fact that he's a mature masculine man. 00:21:02 Terry He is very masculine, honey. 00:21:06 Roy I think I'll say, I don't know if he just told me the other day that she's like, are you 14? And I'm like, yeah, mostly most of the time. Yeah. I haven't dwelled. I'm still the little boy I see the shiny object and have to chase it or have to stand on the rail that you're not supposed to stand on or whatever it is like that. So. 00:21:26 Terry I don't want the frozen pond in the back. That's not all the way frozen. That was scary. Yeah. 00:21:31 Roy We had this winter, we had a Creek behind the house as Stover. I mean, like really bad. It got so cold. And, so were down there. I don't even know why were back there, but I was like, Ooh, let me just test that. She's like, first he tried to talk me out of it and then she could see she wasn't going to do that. She took her camera out and started. She's like, I just want to get a picture of you when you fall through, that's another, important part I think for us is, the laughing and having fun together. Even though we work together, we're together, a lot of time, we still take time to try to laugh and have fun and, not be serious all the time. 00:22:23 Roman Wow. This is, this is impressive because give me given the fact that you guys work together. You already spent quite a lot of time together. You have the time and the energy to also laugh together. I mean, wow. I'm impressed. I'm impressed. 00:22:43 Terry You humor is very important. Yeah. Yeah. Even if it doesn't seem like it's the right time to laugh, ? 00:22:51 Roy Yeah. Humor and, we have a lot of other things in common. Like, we like music, so we're able to bond over, we both have a pretty intense appreciation of music from our childhood and generation. So, we're able to bond over that. But, I was just going to ask though, in, as you help people with relationships, what are, 2, 3, 4, 5 of the largest, contributors to a discord in a relationship? 00:23:25 Roman Well, we actually touched upon some of them, first of all, is communication. Basically a lot of people lay like to stop communication when things go wrong. Yeah. And basically doing it as a punishment. Yeah. Right. Let's say their partner does something that they don't like and punish them with what I call silent treatment. 00:23:50 Terry Women do that a lot. And another mistake, 00:23:55 Roman Another mistake is not praising your partner, just taking them for granted too much. Yeah. Another mistake is taking your relationship for granted and thinking that your partner is not going anywhere, they will stay there for life. This is not true because you always need to be looking for looking to introduce new units and to be a relationship because newness is important for keeping passion. You might have loved, we might have downs of love between each other, but if you don't have passion, your relationship might be due. Right. Another mistake is let's say, I'm sorry. Yeah. Okay. Another mistake is not being emotional enough, not being too touchy and feely because you need that. You need that a romantic connection in addition to your like regular conversational connection. For example, be sure to give hugs, be sure to kiss your partner, be sure to smile at them all the time. 00:25:16 Roman This is also important. 00:25:19 Roy Yeah. I definitely think that one is two and it's funny cause we still hold hands a lot, this like teenagers and that's, and like even at night when we go to sleep, sometimes that's just, my hand over on her just where I can touch her, feel her there. It's just, I don't know. It's kind of weird, but it's important just to have that connection. 00:25:43 Roman And it's not weird. No, that's absolutely normal. And it's actually beautiful. I like that again, you guys rock. Thank you. Well, yeah, just. 00:25:55 Terry Trying to take a compliment. 00:25:58 Roy Yeah. It's, I think the funny part about taking things for granted is that, maybe if you haven't had it, you appreciate it more. But I think it's just the opposite. The better things are between us. The more appreciative I am for her and all of those things, because it's so rare to find, two people that really mesh, I think, as good as we do on so many things. No, I'm not saying we don't have our differences or things that, I was trying to think what that was it's, she doesn't like all lives and I like all lose. We're able to, segregate that and it doesn't have to be a big thing, but for the big things in life, I feel like that we're pretty much on track, but there's always, some little differences that we may not always be together on, but talking about it. 00:26:54 Roy I think the other thing, is respect is that, we have to really respect our partner and their thoughts and their feelings. I don't have to agree with her, but I just have to respect that her life, circumstances have gone, have got her to this belief. And so you have to respect it. 00:27:17 Roman Yeah, that's right. What else can you do? Other, you also have a perspective, your own perception, right. And who knows who's right. Yeah. It's better to be happy to be right. Exactly. Or something, 00:27:31 Terry Something in the middle there, and that's what you just kind of mesh it together. 00:27:36 Roy I think that's a, I hate to get off on the social media tangent, but I will for just a minute that's a problem with that is that, we try to spend so much time to, convince or to talk people into having our point of view that we really don't take the time to listen to them, to see what their point of view is. The other part is that we can harmonize. We don't, I mean, it'd be a boring world if were all carbon copies and all felt the exact same way about everything. I mean, that's what that kind of adds to the spice of life. Just a little bit. And, the other part I get off on this tangent too, but trying new things is that we, Terry's a lot more conservative in that respect and that, especially as we talk about cooking and trying some new things that we're doing is I just tell her, look, do whatever you feel, throw it out there. 00:28:39 Roy Especially, it's like, if it messes up or comes out bad, we can start over or we can go up to the restaurant and get something we're not going to starve to death, but you hear people that is like the wife makes something bad and then it turns into a fuss and, I don't really get that, but I encourage her, do something different. It's it's okay. 00:29:05 Roman Yeah, yeah, definitely. That's one reason you guys have each other present as a masculine man, your, and having her as a feminine woman yeah. In air life. One of your goals is to challenge her in a positive way and that does how you do it. She is a little bit more conservative. As you say, you are there to give her new challenges. Right. And that's one of them. He does. 00:29:39 Terry He really does. I mean, staying in the food genre, I, I fry fried up, I guess it was fried up. Some TemPay never had done that before. We didn't know what it was going to turn out to be, but I don't know. It was, it was lots of prepping and everything. You fry it up and put all your stuff on. It turned out to be pretty good. I just hate doing all that. Tend to know that it's not going to turn out bad in that terrible. I should, I need to try new things. 00:30:07 Roy Yeah. And it's yeah. It's even like, we've been kind of locked down and haven't been out of the house much, but it's like the other thing is the spontaneity. I'm not sure which one of us is more spontaneity. I think we are at different times on different subjects, but, it's like, it was like, were just sitting on the couch one night and I got an email from a, a place that has music. It just said, the first 50 people get free tickets for, it was a cover band, a couple of cover bands. We liked the bands that they were covering. So, what I, I just sent an email in not expecting to win. I got a message back like, oh, you're the winner. So, it was like the next night or two, we just loaded up, went to this place and we had an amazing time. 00:30:58 Roy The music was good. We found a couple bands, but the place was good. And, it was just kind of fun to do something on a whim. 00:31:08 Roman Oh yeah, this is so important. This is important again, because it introduces newness and their relationship. It also see when we become too conservative, we start feeling older. And this is not conducive to love. This is not conducive to passion. When we go back to that younger mindset, we could slip in when we had less responsibilities and so on and so forth, we feel younger. Let's say you go out and you spend a wild night and you come home at 4:00 AM. This is something that makes you feel young. That reenergizes your passion in the relationship. Yeah. 00:31:59 Terry Yeah. I'm just thinking, I'm just thinking about how much older I'm going to feel the next day. 00:32:05 Roy That's me holding back. Yeah. I'm like, what? You can sleep all day. It doesn't matter. We don't have anywhere to be. So, we can go do that kind of stuff. And, I, I think it's fun, it's just new adventures and that we are both, fairly up for adventures. I think that's the other thing is just, having these adventures, experiencing things together and the memories that it provides, because, w we have those things. It's like, oh my gosh, you remember that concert went to and this happened and it's, those are pleasant too. It's like when the, when it is a slow time and you're just kinda sitting around, not doing much and thinking about all these things, it's just, I think it adds to that pleasure from your partner as well. Yeah. Yes. For sure. Well, Roman, we appreciate you taking time to stop by and talk to us today. 00:33:07 Roy Any closing words, any closing thoughts on relationships before we wrap it up? 00:33:14 Roman Yeah. Yeah. One thought is that you need to treat a relationship, your relationship, a romantic one as an important area of your life, like your business or your health. You spend time in those interests, right? Both with your business and kind of your, how, and you also want to spend time, invest time and effort into your relationship. If you live it as is it well die pretty soon, right? So you want to at least read books about read books and get better at it so that you make sure that you stay motivated and you have the right information, the right resources to keep your partner happy. Yeah. Don't take it for granted. Yeah. 00:34:07 Roy Do you have any books off the top of your head, any recommendations that you can think of? If not, don't worry. I'm not, I didn't mean to put you on the spot. I just thought maybe you might. 00:34:16 Roman Have one, I would say two books. The first one is a general one, but it speaks a lot about whole, all things, relationship wise and this Stephen Covey's seven habits of highly effective people. Okay. The second one is by Sharon Salzberg called real love. 00:34:40 Roy Okay. Yeah. And I think it's interesting. I, I'm glad you bring that up because again, I can speak for me and that is a deficit in our relationship because we do something that we really enjoy. And so it's easy to spend. It's easy to spend a lot of time. There's, it's like, there's never an end to the things that we could do, even if we get things done that we've got to have done, there's still always looking at this new form of marketing, looking at this new technology, looking at this. Maybe we want to twist this or tweak that. Anyway, it, and this gets back to the communication is that Terry is, we are confident enough in our relationship. She can tap me on the shoulder and say, all right, you're done. And then, you know, 00:35:33 Terry Like, I'll say why I'll be there in a minute and now say you're a minute or my minute, because they're two different things. 00:35:43 Roy Yeah. It's easy to get hung up in that it just never ends. So, taking that time, if we're going to invest, like you said, we invest time and money in our businesses, in our homes. In a lot of things that we need to take that same approach to our relationships and, really invest and it's time. It's not, thank goodness Terry is not, she's not high dollar maintenance, so that's not an issue. But, just taking that time out of our day to, really be together to have those conversations, it's truly important. I think that's where people, kinda miss out some is that, you got, especially when you have kids, you got kids pulling you one way. You've got parents, you've got your job. Then, V go out and do stuff with friends that it just, it really divide your time down to where you don't have enough to devote to your relationship. 00:36:40 Roy That's the cool thing with Terry and me, it's like, we're best friends. We like to hang out with each other, even outside of work, we like to go do things together. So. 00:36:55 Roman Yes. Yeah. You, you are an inspiration. 00:37:01 Roy Well, we're trying, we have to work at it, but all right, Roman, well, tell everybody, somebody needs some relationship coaching. How can they get ahold of you? 00:37:17 Roman Yes. The best way is go to the website, which is Roman mirror knob.com, spelled as R O M A N M I R O N O V.com. There you have all the links to my social media and the ability to contact me for a free coaching session. If you match the lecture coming up, the Roy and terrorist podcast, I'll be happy to give you a 30% discount. Oh, wow. 00:37:43 Roy Nice. Yeah. 00:37:45 Terry You have a podcast as well, correct? Yes. It just under your name or is it called something else? 00:37:56 Roman It's called be version two of yourself. Okay. 00:38:00 Roy All right. Great. Well, y'all go out and give a listen if you need some help in a relationship and well, let me say it this way. Don't wait till you need help in a relationship, seek out somebody like Roman, that can be preemptive and don't wait until there's a problem. Get the tools that you need to have a successful relationship because it spills over into everything. I have a business show I was talking about, and were just talking about, you can't park your emotions at the door to work. Same thing, coming home, you can't park your work stuff at the door. Everything is all intermingled. For us to have a happy, productive life at work, we have to have a happy, productive life at home. And, again, I'm blessed to have somebody that supports me in everything. I know that she's my biggest champion and there's nobody in this world that I want to see succeed more than her. 00:38:57 Roy I think it's important to, get out in front of that. Don't wait till it's a, don't wait till it's a train wreck to try to clean up the mess, get out there ahead of the game and make it happen where you can continue to be happy in that relationship. 00:39:15 Roman Yeah, that is golden. Yeah. 00:39:19 Roy All right guys. Well, that's going to do it for another episode of feeding fatty I'm Roy. You can always find us at www.feedingfatty.com. We're also on all the major social media platforms, as well as the podcast platforms, iTunes, Stitcher, Google, Spotify. If we're not one in which you listened to, if you'll reach out, we'll certainly be glad to add you. So thanks for listening until next time. Take care of yourself and take care of your family. www.romanmironov.com www.feedingfatty.com

This week, Vicky and Joe answer YOUR questions. Vicky's been asking her email subscribers if they have any questions for her about writing and publishing books, and boy do you have questions! Great questions. The BEST questions. And Vicky and Joe drink misery tea and answer them. Tune in: if you've a burning question about books and publishing, maybe we've answered it. This episode contains bonus Angry Cat.   Key Takeaways: [1:45] Vicky gives a quick update on her latest soon-to-be-released book.  [3:55] Vicky will be answering your questions today!  [4:05] Roy: What bits of digital marketing actually work?  [8:15] Leslie: I don’t have anything unique or novel to say. Where does inspiration come from?  [14:45] Leslie: Do I really need a website?  [18:00] Charles: I don’t know enough to position myself as an expert.  [22:00] Charles: What would you do differently about writing your book knowing what you know now?  [27:30] Tune in next week as Vicky will answer loads, loads more of your questions!    Mentioned in This Episode: Vicky Fraser Vicky’s Podcast Vicky’s Blog Join the Superheroes Vicky’s Business For Superheroes Book The Inner Circle Borrow My Brain Vicky’s Book Club Vicky’s new book! Write & Publish Your Book in 90 Days Email Vicky Subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, and Overcast Mark Dawson's Self Publishing Formula Podcast A Technique for Producing Ideas, by James Young

Dr. Veronica Anderson, Host, Functional Medicine Specialist and Medical Intuitive interviews Roy Nelson on Overcoming Your Food Addiction and Embracing Your Spirituality. Have you been struggling with addiction? Have you tried everything, with no results? Over thirty-five years ago Roy Nelson “cracked the code” of his own addictive personality. As a result, he lost 120 pounds and overcome a myriad of addictions, as well as depression, panic attacks, and phobias. He developed The Nelson Method - a plan of spiritual mentorship that is designed to help people overcome their own personal hell, even when all other approaches have failed. In this episode, Roy will share his near-death experience, how he learned to master his own emotional addiction and the three main components to addiction. He will help you refine your spirituality by encouraging you to ask yourself questions like “Are you living” or “Are you really Addicted”. Listen to the end to determine if Roy’s 28 day health restoration right for you.   Dr. Veronica Anderson's Links   https://www.linkedin.com/in/drveronicaanderson/ https://www.facebook.com/drveronicaanderson/ https://twitter.com/DrVeronicaEyeMD?lang=en https://www.pinterest.com/drveronicaeyemd/?eq=dr.%20veronica&etslf=14837 https://www.instagram.com/drveronica/?hl=en   Recommended Book: Roy Nelson - http://amzn.to/2nZUkXL   Show Notes: 07:40 - Roy’s near death experience at birth 12:00 - Three components to addiction 14:00 - Religious insanity 24:45 - How are you living? 26:00 - Pain is motivation 29:30 - Admitting to addiction 31:10 - Are you really addicted? 34:00 - Restoring your health in 28 days _______________________________ Dr. Veronica Anderson is an MD, Functional Medicine practitioner, Homeopath. and Medical Intuitive. As a national speaker and designer of the Functional Fix and Rejuvenation Journey programs, she helps people who feel like their doctors have failed them. She advocates science-based natural, holistic, and complementary treatments to address the root cause of disease. Dr. Veronica is a highly-sought guest on national television and syndicated radio and hosts her own radio show, Wellness for the REAL World, on FOX Sports 920 AM “the Jersey” on Mondays at 7:00 pm ET.   If you enjoyed this episode, do us a favor and share it! Also if you haven’t already, please take a minute to leave us a 5-star review on iTunes and claim your bonus here!   Do you want to regain your health? Visit: http://drveronica.com/ Transcript Female VO: Welcome to the Wellness Revolution Podcast, the radio show all about wellness in your mind, body, spirit, personal growth, sex, and relationships. Stay tuned for weekly interviews featuring guests that have achieved physical, mental, and spiritual health in their lives. If you'd like to have access to our entire back catalog visit drveronica.com for instant access. Here's your host, Dr. Veronica. Dr. Veronica: Hi, I'm Dr. Veronica. Welcome to another episode of Dr. Veronica's Wellness Revolution. I'm really excited today about the guest that I have. There's going to be a lot of people who connect with this story. So holistically we understand that I'm a medical doctor and also a medical intuitive. And I work with people with holistic health coaching. So what's the issue that I get with a lot of people? I don't accept everybody. I want to make sure you're going to be successful when you enter the program to get your life together.  So if there's something that's holding you back, that makes you not appropriate for my particular type of program. And there a lot of doctors who do functional wellness who can help you. Usually it's those people who have addictions.  And one of the hardest addictions that I found to deal with is food addiction. So people never think they're addicted to food. Drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, you name it. But most of the time people don't want to admit that they have a food addiction. Food addictions can be harder to treat than getting somebody off of methamphetamine, ice, heroin, and all the nine yards. You know why? Because you just can't go cold turkey with food. You got to eat. And so that's what makes it even more difficult. However, for those of you who are addicted to food there is hope.  And you're going to say, "How do I know I'm addicted to food?" I get people to come to me. They tell me they're emotional eaters. I had a lady I interviewed earlier in the week for my program. She said, "I eat when I'm sad. I eat when I'm happy. I eat when I'm happy. I eat more when I'm sad. I use food as my comfort all of the time for everything. I've had this happen in my life and I eat. I have that happen in my life, I eat." "How much weight have you gained? How much overweight are you?" "About 130 pounds. Most people underestimate, I'm about 130 pounds overweight." "Have you ever tried anything? What have you tried and how long have you tried it?" "I've cut back on soda. I've cut back on carbs." "How long did that last?" "Well, not a long time. I'm not good at it." "What have you done that you feel has been successful?" "I did a tea fast for two weeks." "Two weeks, huh. How much weight did you lose?" "About 15 pounds." "How long did it take you to gain it back?" Well, the answer comes. "Not only did I gain it back, I gained back more."  I have with me, who you're also looking at his beautiful bald head. He looks like a monk, Roy Nelson. Roy Nelson has a great book. He's the author of Love Notes from Hell. I'm going to give you upfront what his website is just because I want to say it several times, roynelsonhealing.com. Because he helps people get out of this food addictions. When everything else has failed Roy succeeds.  So of course I'm bringing people to you who if you say, "Dr. Veronica I really want to help, and I know I'm a food addict, help me." We're actually going to give you a little quiz that you can take later on to figure out if you are a food addict. I want you to be able to find somebody like Roy Nelson. Roy, I met him at... You guys know I always travel around different events. I met his wife way before I met him. I met his wife and we met probably on the first day of an event. And Trisha comes up to me and we were chit chatting and talking. We're very similar personalities at this point in life I would say because I know Trisha had her own journey. And she said, "You really have to meet my husband. I want you to meet my husband." I had no idea why she was telling me this.  I told people I do podcasts. I'm looking for people to help my clients or people that I can't help. "You got to meet my husband." And so I don't even know if... Roy, did we actually meet? We might have said hello briefly but I don't even know if we actually met each other at the event. Did we? Roy: No. I was only there for the evening. Dr. Veronica: So we didn't meet because he just walked through for a few hours. I saw him from a distance. We never got to say hello but I got his book from Trisha and I started reading it. It was fascinating. I said, "I got to get this guy on the show."  Roy is the last resort guy. He has a special method, the Nelson method. You know he had to name it because other people can't get results when you cease doing something different. And if you don't get results, you keep doing the same thing; you got to do something different. Roy, I thank you so much for being on Dr. Veronica's Wellness Revolution. Welcome. Roy: Thank you so much. Thank you for having me on. I appreciate for letting me be here. And hello to everybody. Thank you. Dr. Veronica: Roy, tell us a little bit about your journey. I know this is in your book Love Notes from Hell. And that sounds like, "Oh my god, do I really want to read a book about love notes from hell?" First, how did you come up with the title for that book? Roy: Well, it's so interesting how I came together. People have been telling me for decades that I should write a book and finally I hired a branding lady who demanded a book. And then actually the gentleman she put together for branding me came up with a title and it seems very fitting. I don't know that I would've come up with it that way.  Same way with the picture on the front, they did an all-day photo shoot and they get a picture of me. And the one they got me when I was slouching in the morning, waiting for them to get the lights ready. So he's been practicing and just clicking pictures. And the one they wanted was the one that was shot before it ever started to shoot. I don't pose very well but when I'm off guard that's how they caught me. Dr. Veronica: Oh yeah. I've done photo shoots so I know how that works. And I pick some of the pictures that were mistakes. Roy: Yeah. Dr. Veronica: "Oh my gosh, this is really an iconic picture. And they're the ones that the camera was... I have one that's a silhouette picture and it came out that way in the dark because [Unintelligible 00:07:33]. Anyway, they picked the book. The content of the book made the branding person say, "Oh my god, this was hell." Tell us a little bit about your background. Roy: Well, the way I put it is I almost died at birth and then it went downhill from there, just to give you an idea. Actually I did almost suffocate at birth. Back in the day when I was born I was born at home and then the doctor wasn't there. The midwife was there. The doctor finally showed up but the umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck and I was choking and I turned blue and all that stuff.  But I would tell you in that course I grew up in a violent poverty stricken alcoholic home and a violent place where I lived and growing up. My whole childhood was I was in constant fear of physical harm. And consequently I've been afraid my entire life. That's the hell, the fear. That's really living in fear is hell.  Of course I always come into violence and everything that goes with it, even at home and on the way in the neighborhood, on the way to school, on the way home from school, at school, everything was really... I was in over my head from the very beginning.  From the beginning the first addiction for all of us is fantasy. When the here and now is so painful sweet spirit gives us the capacity to get there and then. So that's the fantasy that we have. And then of course early childhood sexual experiences cause us to be obsessed with sex and of course all that goes with that. And then of course and which many emotional eaters, people with eating disorders have early childhood sexual experiences.  Dr. Veronica: When you say early for you what age is early? Roy: Oh, very young.  Dr. Veronica: Below 10? Roy: Oh yes, absolutely. Dr. Veronica: Okay. Roy: But all things worked together for good. This is really a condition that can ultimately cause you to become better than you ever would've been if you haven't had it. So it's actually all a blessing. Everything that happened... What seemed bad at the time turned out to be a good thing. It's all in divine order. I added cigarettes when I was about 12 and then of course I worked from the time as a little kid. I always tried to make money because we were very poor. And then I left home when I was 14. I always worked with older people because I was a kid and I was working with adults. The men I worked with, ever grown men, and the women I was working with, the first women I worked with were in their 30's and I was 15, whatever. I'm just saying, I was always in over my head. Went away to the army the day I was 17 and was married when I was 20. And then I married a woman who had a child and a year and a half later we had a child. We had twins. And about a year later, before I was 23 I was a father of four. Way in over my head always. I was a sergeant in the army which I wasn't emotionally equipped for any of it because I've been medicating my emotions from the beginning. Although a lot of times we do a good job when we're shut down emotionally, we get the job done.  Ultimately I got out of the army when I was 24 years old and of course I had a family and I had no money. Then it was about making money. The first year was tough but then after that I found something I can do. It paid very well. Then it was about acquiring stuff. A big house at the country club section and new luxury cars, and one thing and another. By the time I was 28 years old I was making rounds to the psychiatrist for panic attacks, phobias, and all that stuff. It's all a process. I did the doctor rounds for about four and a half years and finally turned to the spiritual. When nothing else worked I finally... And I would've done anything to get heat from having a go on a spiritual basis because that's so much religious insanity in my childhood which goes along with all that other stuff that goes with it. That was the nightmare. Anyway, I hit bottom when I was 32 and I was morbidly obese and completely dependent on alcohol. I had a bag of pills. I didn't like pills. It was the time I used to hire a doctor or registered nurse to travel with me so they could get me IV's of valium or sodium pentothal if the terror got too bad. I drove big cars, smoked cigarettes, chased fast women. Basically I was a relief seeking missile if you get the picture. Ultimately I spent my life running from pain and chasing pleasure. Dr. Veronica: Okay. Roy: The pain I created in the process of trying to run from the pain turned out to be more painful than the pain I was running from. Dr. Veronica: Are you talking your pain as in all the addictive behaviors that you would've accumulated over the years or was there another type of pain? Roy: Every addiction is a symptom. Addictions are symptoms they're not the problem. People think they are and that's why alcoholics think alcohol's their problem, food addicts think food's their problem, and sex addicts think sex is their problem, but it's not.  Every addiction has three components, it's a pain killer, it's a form of escape, it's a form of punishment. I have the pain inside because I was a very sensitive, terrified person, and I buried a lot of pain. And the thing is when you bury it that way you bury it alive and it's in there festering. And then you have to have the pain killer. As long as I had the pain I would to have a pain killer.  And there's many different things that we use to try and cope with that pain. As long as I had the fear of my feelings I would always be running, I would always be looking for escape. And as long I had the guilt, the remorse, and the self-hatred I would always require punishment.  So what I'm about is helping people feel safe enough to deal with their pain, deal with their fear, deal with their guilt, remorse, and self-hatred so that they don't need the pain killer, they don't need escape, they don't need punishment. Dr. Veronica: I want to back up a little bit because you said something really interesting. Challenging for people to swallow, you talked about religious insanity, religiosity. Talk a little bit about that because a lot of people are hyper religious. If you say anything what they consider negative against religion or anything in that realm they'll say, "Oh no, you're horrible. You're talking against God." Talk about that religious insanity. I can tell you I understand what you mean by it but other people who are on particular religious pathways that may not sit well with them. Roy: That's fine. The important thing to understand is that God is love. And when we abide in love we abide in God, and God in us. Everything that isn't love isn't God.  Dr. Veronica: Okay, I agree with that. What happened in your childhood specifically that you say religious insanity that was problematic, that is not God is love, and that you see in people who are addicts? Roy: Well, the important thing to understand is not what we believe intellectually that matters. As the famous Carpenter had to say as we believe in our heart. As a man thinks in his heart so is he... Dr. Veronica: E'er shall he go. Roy: The important thing to understand is that most of what's driving people is in their subconscious mind. First off I personally believe I brought baggage with me from previous lives. But if that's too crazy or too scary for people that's okay. [Unintelligible 00:17:01] that. No worries. Throw that out the window.  I think we would all agree that from conception we're gathering data. We have no filter, no discerning capability, and nobody intentionally poisoned me with faulty data. But the data they had that's the only thing they could give me. And the other thing is there's a lot of things that we took on into our master computer, the subconscious mind. A lot of beliefs and ideas that we took on weren't actually sad. They were implied, with the impression we got was that what they meant. It has nothing to do with whatever anybody did to us. We'd go through lying and pointing the finger to somebody else but we're never going to get better that way. But the important thing to understand is we're gathering data and we have a lot of faulty data going into our master computer. And based on that data we formulate our core beliefs that as our ideas about God, about ourselves, about other people, about everything, about our lives.  Based on our core beliefs we formulate our philosophy for living. That is our way of navigating our way through this hostile world we perceive ourselves to be in. Based on the faulty philosophy, faulty beliefs, faulty data we build a life that requires us to use something to cope with it. Basically that's what addictions are, they're coping mechanisms.  The addiction isn't the problem, the addiction is what I used to try to cope with the problem. The problem is the tornado going on inside. And so I call it religious insanity. And the other thing is that most of the people who have eating disorders are terrified of their sexuality. I call it religious insanity manifested as sexual insanity.  Dr. Veronica: What does that look like? For people who are saying "Is this me?" what does that look like through outside or how do you know that that's you, religious insanity with sexual insanity going on too? Roy: It's one and the same. Because the primary thing that the religion teaches is that your sexuality is bad. And how far from the truth could that be. Essentially what its saying is take your second strongest God-given instinct. First instinct is for survival. Breathing air, drinking water, eating food, having shelter, being protected. The second strongest God-given instinct is survival of the race. That means pro-creation, that means sex. Essentially the message that I got was take your second strongest God-given instinct, bury it alive, pretend you don't have it and you'd be happy. How insane could that be?  Dr. Veronica: I'm agreeing with you. I've seen all these issues... Roy: Of course you have. Dr. Veronica: To the point where I've walked away from religion because I refuse to be part of organizations that tell me that I'm bad. Roy: Absolutely.  Dr. Veronica: ...own and wouldn't accept it, no I'm not a sinner. And so of course when people who are like me say that they call you rebellious and Jezebel and all these other names. You have a strong personality to reject that because we all want to be part of our tribe. And so by rejecting religion a lot of times people say you're rejecting being part of the tribe. And so you're afraid that if you reject those tenets that you're going to be kicked out of the tribe and you're not willing to be kicked out of the tribe. Roy: That's fine. But the important thing to understand, once again a famous carpenter he said, "The Father is within me." And that's where the spirit is, is deep within our hearts. And so for any addict or emotional eater, food addict, whatever it is, the problem is deep within. The solution is deeper within. Sweet spirit deep within you.  The essence of you and your... not you particularly Dr. Veronica but all of us of course, but I'm talking to your crew, your people out there. The essence of all of us is spirit. And what I'm about is helping people feel safe enough to face these things within themselves that are blocking them from the sweet spirit that's deep within them that can heal them. I don't heal anybody. I don't think any human being heals anybody. Dr. Veronica: That's correct. Roy: What we could do is help them to align themselves with the sweet spirit within themselves that does the healing. I'm really along for the ride. I'm about helping people feel safe enough to go within. And that's what happens when people come to me, and I have people come from all over the world. It's amazing how they find me with everything that goes on. The last one recently, a dear lady friend doctor, a friend of mine featured my book on her book club and some lady in Abu Dhabi read it and came in to see me. It's beautiful how it works and now... Dr. Veronica: I hope these podcast reaches people. The purpose of doing this is ultimately yes I'm a healthcare practitioner. I'm an intuitive. I come across a lot of people who I know that their issue is very... All illnesses and injuries have a root cause that's emotional and spiritual, all of them, every single one. You don't just get something.  And so it's interesting because I will talk about this, I had talked about my intuitive abilities and people say, "We can't deal with you because we don't believe in that. We don't want to talk about that." I'm like, "Okay, that's somebody I can't work with because they don't understand what holistic really means, that they're mind, body, spirit. That means that we have to work on all those levels. If you're not willing to open up and work on that level that's out of my core genius area. That's why I'm bringing you on and other people like you who have strategies to work particularly on that. But those people who haven't realized that their illnesses and injuries are their biggest sole challenges. They're challenges to your soul. You're here to learn something. They're not going to heal from it.  Roy: I'm totally on board with that. Dr. Veronica: Your book shows like this, somebody's going to listen to this and watch this, and it's going to resonate with them. And they're going to be happy that a doctor said, "Listen, you don't get your spiritual self together ain't no medicine, no food, no nutrition plan, no supplement, no hormone testing, no adrenal this, no thyroid that is going to help you." Roy: That's so true. The thing is my experience is everything on the outside is there to help me to refine on the inside. That's why I believe that's why we're here on this level of existence. This is not to realize. We're temporarily human but we're essentially spirit. But we have opportunities for refining here for growth and development here that we wouldn't have on a purely ethereal level. Dr. Veronica: Doggy wants to come in. We're listening. Roy: Hey, hi. Dr. Veronica: People enjoy seeing that on the film so that's why I let him make an appearance. Roy: Absolutely. But one thing I will say, it's often times easier to help somebody who thinks they don't believe in God than it is to try to help somebody who thinks they do. Dr. Veronica: Interesting. Explain that more. Roy: Well, because oftentimes people who believe they believe in God have a lot of pride around their beliefs. And that pride can keep them from... In other words when you think you know everything then you can't learn. And in my experience this whole process is about unlearning.  And I have people who come to me who are very religious, in fact one woman in particular you can watch her videos on my website. I want to make sure people understand I don't broadcast who I work with, but some of the people who I've worked with want to be part of my outreach and they volunteer to do video on my website. So please understand, I'm not going to plaster your name out there if you work with me. One woman's very religious, actually many people who come are very religious. But the thing is I always just say to people look at the pudding. Check the pudding. Because the proof is always in the pudding. Bottom line how's it working.  The other thing is too Dr. Veronica, I think you understand, I know you hear what I'm saying here. The only thing any of us have to do is ask [No audio 00:26:55] how am I living, what am I believing, what am I doing, what's it costing me? Dr. Veronica: In other words how's that working for you. Roy: Well, what's it getting me, what's it costing me, and is that okay. Because we all pay a price. Everybody on this earth pays a price for how they live. We get certain perceived benefits but pay a certain price. You live at Bucks County, you get some perks, you get some benefits, pay a price. Live in Manhattan, get some benefits, pay a price. Everybody in between pays a price. Who's to say for somebody else if that price is okay. Each person has to ask themselves is that okay. And there's no wrong answer. Dr. Veronica: That sounds like you reap what you sow. Roy: Absolutely. And there's no wrong answer, because the nature of evolution is evolve we must. And there's no time limit on eternity, right? The universe loves u so much it'll allow us to hurt as long as we need to hurt. Dr. Veronica: It's true. We all keep banging our heads on the wall in certain areas until we get it right. Roy: Yeah. And again I was morbidly obese for a number of years. And I deluded myself that it was okay. But what started me toward having to do something about it was panic attacks and all of this stuff. When you bury your emotion, it's like when you bury anything, it's like a volcano the more you press it down the more it wants to explode. And that's what eventually happens. Not everybody gets to that place. Many people who are morbidly obese that'll end, what's the roll call, the lives of quiet desperation. They just settle in and that's fine. There's no wrong answer. That's probably what I would've done if I hadn't had the panic attacks and the crippling depression, phobias, anxiety, and all the stuff that went with it. But some people have it so buried, their feelings are so buried that they don't have those things. There's no wrong answer. Each person has to decide for themselves because there's a price for getting better. You have to go through hell to get to heaven, right? Dr. Veronica: Yes. I believe that we live in the dichotomies. So you have to know down to know up. You have to know black to know white. You have to know good to know bad. You have to have both experience for comparison purposes because that's just the way the human mind works. Roy: Absolutely. And that's why I would never try to convince anybody that working with me is the thing to do. There's an opportunity here for total freedom. My experience is people come to me usually when the first or second day all their addictions fall away. And if they're overweight they start losing weight effortlessly and which is my only hope because I don't have the power to resist temptation. If I want to eat it I don't have the power not to eat it. My only hope is sweet spirit will remove my desire for those things that aren't good for me and for amount of things that aren't good for me. Because in and of myself I don't have that power. That's my only spirit.  That's what I'm talking people is having people start to experience that sweet spirit. People come here they're hating their momma. They come here they're here for a few days and start loving their momma. They got all this stuff inside it's hard for people to be able to see themselves as they actually are on their own. Nobody can do this alone. Dr. Veronica: Yes. You can't do it alone. Please understand, there's no such thing as self-help. You have to have somebody to help you. You need a mentor, a coach, somebody who's going to guide you who's outside that box. I tell people that all the time. Because they want to stay home and they want to read books and watch... I say people are going to the university of Google and good friend with Dr. YouTube.  This is part of learning. But then you have to know what you don't know and then get to that point where it's so painful, it's so bad that you're going to reach out. But not only just reach out, you're going to do something. You're going implement. Tell me a little bit more. Because your book has chapters on all the different addictions. Are they all different? Why do you break it down like that? Roy: Well, it's to help people to identify. First off no addict wants to know they're an addict. Nobody wants to think they're an addict. I had so many addictions I didn't think I had any. And the thing is it doesn't matter. Frankly if a person doesn't have an addiction that's fine too. All God's children got problems. It doesn't matter... Dr. Veronica: In one form or another, yes. Roy: It doesn't matter what the manifestation is, there's only one problem and there's only one solution. The problem is always this perception of being separate from God. You can't even be separate from God. God and you are one but if you perceive yourself to be separate, you think you are, you act like you are, you feel like you are, for all intents and purposes you are even though you aren't. There's one problem, there's one solution.  The one solution is the conscious contact, the sweet spirit deep within. And that's what I'm about helping people contact. And that's the only thing that can heal them. That's the only thing that can remove the obsession, the compulsion to overeat or to hurt themselves with anything. And there's never just one thing. It's a myriad of things that people use. Because it kind of goes with the territory. In other words if you got one you've got a lot of other things going on at the same time. Often times we'll use one thing to keep the other thing down. Dr. Veronica: Let's talk a little bit more about your definition of addiction. You put it in there so people can start to identify... There's commonalities. Some people are going to say, "Am I addict or not?" Are there are a few characteristics that you can tell people that if you're having this or that. You got to give them a symptom. Because we're talking very high hyperbole and all this other type of stuff that people say. Let's get down to it.  "Roy, Dr. Veronica, how do I know if I'm really addicted? Tell me what I need to do." Because we're very reductionist here. We want to know. I want the checklist. I want the test. So here are a couple of the things. Roy: Do you deal primarily with people with their eating? Is that what you deal with primarily? Dr. Veronica: People come to me a lot of times because they're concerned about their weight. They're concerned about... Sometimes they'll come because they're concerned about belly fat. But a lot of times it'll be my thyroid's bothering me. My digestion's bothering me. I'm concerned that my hormones are out of balance.  Roy: First off we have doctors including you of course that we refer people to for their hormones, or they thyroid, or their adrenals. I don't practice medicine as such. And we have a lot of good doctors including yourself that we refer people to along those lines. But generally speaking overweight is a symptom of overeating. And overeating is a symptom of what's eating you. That's what we're dealing with is what's eating you.  There's no way on earth that I could abstain from all that I need to abstain from except the grace of God would remove my desire for those things, my need, my requirement for those things. There's nothing I can do. And certainly we know estrogen causes belly fat and we know thyroid and stuff like that. There's issues but those are generally excuses that people use when they don't want to face their real problems. I take thyroid medication and I take stuff for my adrenals. I'm not saying that those things aren't real. I take things for my neurotransmitters. I'm not saying those things aren't real, they are. But none of those are going to keep me from destroying myself with excess food. Only God can do that, and only I can let it. And I'm about helping people let. Because only god can do it. And only that person can let God do it for them.  And I'm helping them get themselves out of the way so that the sweet spirit... When I say God I'm not talking about the bearded man in the sky with a clipboard. I'm talking about the sweet spirit deep within. That's where we have to go, deep within. Dr. Veronica: Now you said in a couple of days usually people start changing. I know you have a 28-day program. People say, "If I can get it in two days, yeah, that's it." Why 28 days? Roy: That's precisely why we do the 28-day program because the thing is people often think overeating is their problem. And so when they come to me and when they stop overeating they think they're cured. And you and I know that's not true.  Dr. Veronica: No. Roy: That's not true because we have to deal with the underlying causes that caused us to have to overeat in the first place. And that's a lifetime. That's not a 28-day program. I only said 28-day program because that's the call that most of us... people who want immediate results that most people can get their head around. People come here, "I don't know if I can do 28 days." And then they're in the 3rd week and say, "Roy, you're never going to kick me out after 28 days, right?"  Dr. Veronica: Wow. Roy: I do a 28-day program but I work with them longer if they have a good attitude and want to keep going and want to keep growing and developing. It would start with a 28-day face-to-face and go from there. They don't live here. If they come here from out of town we have them arranged for local housing. Of course some people come here from local.  Whatever it is it's always lifted. It's just a matter of being willing to let me into their heart so that they can feel safe when people come here with a big wall of fear around their heart. And what I'm about is I'm putting up a big wall of love around their heart so they can gradually lower that wall of fear. So that all that stuff that's inside that needs to be addressed come tumbling out. And then we can sort it out. It's a process and it's absolutely amazing. Dr. Veronica: You know what I find amazing, you're doing it from a different way. How I work with people, we talk a lot, something about the emotional things that are going on in people's lives and I challenge them a lot. I'm the tough love person. I just think it's amazing how many of them have spiritual revelations. Roy: That's what happens. Exactly. Dr. Veronica: I'm hitting at them from a physical side but they have a spiritual revelation and it's beautiful because I say to them, "I'm so happy to see that you're happy now. Because when you came and you first sat down with me and you were having a really hard time making a decision to make the investment of time and your finances. You were so miserable. I saw you hear crying. I knew I could help you but I know that you had to make that decision. I'm so happy because we've been working together for three, four weeks, and you're such a different person now." And they say, "I know it." It's amazing. I'm not quite sure where it is. I work with people and I always mention these spiritual... I know when people work with me. I'm going to mention those spiritual and emotional pieces. They start to have it on their own. Once they make the decision to make the commitment, and they start on the pathway.  Or maybe it's because they understand that I'm open to listening in a different way and giving them the type of emotional and spiritual feedback. It's a beautiful thing I got to tell you. Because I have the people who they'll do testimonials for me and they just look so happy. And that's not even everything they can say that's good.  Roy: You happen to feel same enough to start feeling things that they were previously afraid to feel. Dr. Veronica: Those are the people who do the best and that have the revelations like that. I'm thinking of people that I know who haven't had the revelation yet. Of course my phone's going to ring in the middle of it. Those people don't have the revelation, those are the people who quit or they just don't get where they want to go. Roy: I understand that. Dr. Veronica: Your website is roynelsonhealing.com. Is that where people can go to find you? Roy: Yes, absolutely, roynelsonhealing.com.  Dr. Veronica: Wonderful. Roy Nelson, Read his book, Love Notes from Hell. We can get that Amazon? Roy: Yes, ma'am. It's actually best-seller in three categories.  Dr. Veronica: It's fascinating to read because when you read somebody's... everything they've been through and then you meet them at a later point and you see how they have that aura of wonderful energy around them it's like, "Oh my god, he's been all of that?" Roy: All grace, absolute grace. Unwarranted, unearned grace. Dr. Veronica: Yes. Thank you so much Roy. I'm happy that you're doing this for people who want to get in touch with Roy please do so. Don't wait. The reason that you're energetically pulled to watch this particular interview is because you need it to.  And so I'm Dr. Veronica. You know you can find me at drveronica.com. This is Roy Nelson, Roy Nelson Healing. And this is Dr. Veronica's Wellness Revolution. You're not going to get well unless you put together mind, body, and spirit.  Your biggest challenge is to your soul, to your evolution. And learning your life purpose is through illness and injury. We all have them. Thank you Roy Nelson. Roy: Thank you. I appreciate you. Dr. Veronica: Hey everyone. I want to really thank you so much for listening to my new podcast, Dr. Veronica's Wellness Revolution. I really enjoy helping others regain their health. So if this episode helps you, it can definitely help others. Do me a favor. Give us a five star review on iTunes to help me spread this message.  And because I really appreciate your help so much I will be giving away a $25 Amazon gift card each week to a random individual. Check the show notes of this episode for the details on how to win. Thank you so much. Take care. Female VO: Thank you for listening to the Wellness Revolution Podcast. If you want to hear more on how to bring wellness into your life visit drveronica.com. See you all next week. Take care.  Have you enjoyed this episode? Share it with friends and family!

In this round table episode of the Pickaxe Podcast, I am joined by former Denver Stiffs editor-in-cheif and all-around great guy, Nate Timmons as well as the King of Thornton himself, Jeff Morton. We cover 25 major topics and storylines for the Nuggets season. We also predict where the Nuggets will finish in the western conference and explore what some potential rivalries might spring up. Timestamps 3:00 - Storylines Which Nuggets player are you most excited to watch this season? What Nuggets lineup are you most excited about? Which Nuggets game are you most excited for this season? What will be the team’s biggest strength? What will be the team’s biggest weakness? 18:00 - Odds and Percentages What % would you give Murray to win ROY? What % would you give Nurkic to win MIP? What % would you give Barton to win 6MOY What are the odds that Malone sticks with the Jurkic lineup all season long? What are the odds that someone is traded? What are the odds that a Nuggets player makes the all-star game? 30:30 - Fun Stuff Who will have the highest scoring game this season? Give another name suggestion for Balkan Buddy Ball Who is the Nuggets “villain?” Who is the Nuggets “hero?” Which player is most likely to give Malone a headache? Who will become the team’s biggest rival? 42:00 - Records and predictions What will the Nuggets record be after their first 8 games? 6 on road, home vs POR & GSW What will the Nuggets record be? Where will the Nuggets finish in the NW? Where will the Nuggets rank in attendance? What is your hottest take prediction for the 2016-17 season? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Drs Joy & Roy Martina are an Intuitive Psychologist and a Holistic MD.  They are trainers, strategic business coaches and bestselling authors of over 60 books. This powerful couple has been teaching transformational workshops in Europe and China for many years and they are excited to now be bringing their knowledge and experience to the United States.  Joy and Roy are health food lovers, exercise maniacs, happiness addicts and never go to bed angry or stressed. They love working together as this fuses their gifts and talents so beautifully for the good of their clients.  And for anyone who has ever witnessed them working together you have seen the beautiful dance of partnership that they embody. Guiding Principle, Quote or Mantra Joy - What you do not want done for yourself, do not to others. Roy - What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Tripped Up in a Partnership Roy - When he signed an agreement with a friend and business partner and literally signed his business away. Friendship and business are two separate types of partnership and they have different rules. Joy - When she was not being clear enough in what is serving her. So she would make the mistake of hiring someone because they were a delightful person, but did not have the skills to do the job for which they were being hired. The “DUH” moment that changed your partnerships forever Roy - When his youngest son was living with them for a while and he was not keeping any agreements with them. Once he stopped enabling his son, he totally shifted. Even though they meant well, it does not always serve that person. Joy - As a parent, one doesn’t want to see your child suffer, but sometimes “rescuing” them does not serve their highest good. Proudest moment in partnership Roy - Giving up a $10 million business for love. Joy - After years of animosity and conflict to have an entire patchwork family sit at the dinner table in peace and harmony to celebrate her youngest son Jacob’s graduation. Current Partnership that Has You Excited Joy - Her partnership with Roy where they can talk like best friends, play like children and argue like husband and wife while being protective of each other like a brother and sister. It is a holistic relationship that never ceases to amaze her. Roy - Spent 30 years living his life and business as a lone wolf. Now to have complete partnership with Joy is the best thing that ever happened. What is the best partnership / relationship advice you have ever received? Joy - Everything that irritates us in another is there to help us understand and heal something about ourselves. Roy - Live each day as if it was your last day. Never go to bed angry. And start your day with an intention. Best Partnership Book Joy - Inner Circle Meditations (http://christallin.com/en/) (sign up for it on their home page) - this is how they meditate with their own family from 5 years of age and up. Focus on how to allow peace to come into our lives so you can hold the space for more of the good to come into your life.   Roy - The Little Book of Karma (http://christallin.com/en/product/the-little-book-on-karma/) - it is about partnership and how to create positive karma in all relationships. Very practical examples of how to apply spiritual laws to everyday life. Parting Advice Roy - Stay playful. Do unexpected things. Don’t get stuck in routines. And most importantly be grateful. Joy - Practice the art of forgiving and letting go. Anything that happened to us in the past is not worth holding onto, because - [spp-tweet tweet="holding on is allowing the past to destroy our present."] Gratitude and worry are not compatible. Interview Links - Joy and Roy’s Website (http://christallin.com/en/) Joy and Roy’s Facebook...