Emotional Leadership

Intellectually most of us want lots of constructive feedback. But we also often avoid asking for it and can become emotionally distraught when we believe we've received some. Why do so many of us experience this paradox? In this episode we're going to talk about the Feedback Paradox, one of the ways the messages you've been socialized with might be impacting how you think about receiving feedback. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/19.  

“How was I not aware of that…” Today we’re talking about why we miss important opportunities to live our values: Noticing and addressing problematic behaviour in our friend groups, putting our money into businesses that align with our values, and identifying microaggressions and racist policies. I’ll show you why these filters are missing and how to create the ones that are important to you. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/18.

Our brains’ desire to keep us safe is our biggest challenge in leading anti-racism initiatives at work and in the world around us. In this episode you’re going to learn two key tactics for defeating that over-active safety mechanism: creating a vision for who you want to be and programming your brain on the fly.  Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/17.

Thriving teams do anti-racist work. Good managers aim to create an environment where every member of our team can thrive. But as an industry we’ve spent too long pretending that our Black team members can thrive in the thoughtlessly-racist default culture of American companies. It’s time to change that, and as leaders it’s our responsibility to drive this change within our companies. Let’s get started together. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/16.

The key to reaching your goals is to stop trying to distract yourself from emotional experiences you’re not comfortable with. That’s much, much easier when you know what an emotion is. Join me today to talk about what an emotion is, why you like some and hate others, and how to get more comfortable with all of them so you can stop distracting yourself and get to work on your dreams. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/15.

It’s time to stop beating yourself up. Many of us spend our lives being mean to ourselves, justifying it as helpful or realistic. But it actually steals our dreams. Today we’re talking about why we beat up on ourselves, why it holds us back, and how to finally break the habit. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/14.

Big things come from small steps. Learn how to take small steps every day to create clear vision, stop distracting yourself, and take massive action (which isn't the same as big action!). Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/13.

Anger is an emotion many of us are uncomfortable feeling at work -- but turning it off hinders our ability to fix important problems and feel the biggest positive emotions. Join me and Vivien Yang from Eventbrite as we talk about the benefits and challenges of anger. Plus I’ll teach you how to allow strong emotions so you can handle bigger emotions better. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/12.

Wish you could re-program your brain? Today I’m teaching you the very simple recipe to do just that - all it takes is practice. Plus Sira Laurel joins me to talk about why curiosity helps you move past blocks in your career and projects, and how to create more of it. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/11.

Many of us get derailed by guilt and waste time on tasks that aren't that important. What if you could easily stay focused on your main priorities instead? Join me as I talk with Ken Struys about how to do exactly that. After that we'll fix a common problem when creating thought models. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/10, or text MIXEDMODELS to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

We often think that trust is something our co-workers have to earn. But trust is an emotion, meaning we create it for ourselves from how we choose to think. Today Emily and Alison Moses, Director of Business IT at HomeServe, talk about trust. Learn why we have to trust our reports if we want them to grow (and how to recognize when you're not), how to bootstrap trust for a co-worker you don't know very well, and two ways to generate trust (or any other feeling) for yourself whenever you want. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/9, or text MORETRUST to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

Choosing our thoughts intentionally lets us choose how we experience our life. It lets us create any results we want. And it lets us choose how we're going to feel. For most of us, empathy is our first experience with intentionally trying on new thoughts, by seeing a situation through the perspective of another person. Today, Emily is joined by guest Garrett Ledbetter, founder and leadership coach at The Leadership Effect and General Manager at Old Navy. Emily and Garrett talk about the importance of empathy in the workplace, discuss noticing assumptions, and go deep on practicing new thoughts.  Get the full show notes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/8, or text ASSUMPTIONS to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

Everything we want, we want because of how we think it will make us feel. But the truth is that our own thoughts are the only things that can create our emotions. Join me as I talk with Jill Wetzler, Head of Engineering at Pilot, about what makes it easy for her to feel validation and how she creates an environment that makes it easy for team members too. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/6, or text VALIDATED to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

We can't prevent feelings we don't like from happening. But if we're willing to allow them in our bodies for a minute or two without trying to shove them away, we can teach our brain a new playbook for what to do next. Join me and Lulu as we talk about how to use the common emotion of frustration to learn this process. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/7, or text FRUSTRATED to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

Whether we're wearing the hat of manager, leader or engineer, our jobs are about making decisions all day long. Patricia Perozo and I talk about why confidence is critical for making effective decisions, and why we resist it anyway. Then I'll teach you the Self-Coaching Model - the framework backing much of my coaching work. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/5, or text THEMODEL to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

When our brain notices we're experiencing an emotion it engages one of four responses: React, Resist, Avoid, or Allow.  In this episode my guest Jeff Ammons from One Medical and I teach you how to identify which response you're using, and how to intentionally choose the Allow response - the healthiest of the four. Along the way we explain why sitting with your anxiety instead of rushing to push it away is important for healthy relationships at work and share a variety of tips for reducing your body's fight or flight reaction to it. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/4, or text ALLOWING to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

To lead well we need to be vulnerable with our teams - and with ourselves. Today Jessica Mink of Auth0 and I talk about why knowing what you're feeling is critical for your emotional health, the right way to be vulnerable with your team, and why being vulnerable with yourself is required to hit big goals. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/3, or text VULNERABILITY to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

Discomfort is a critical emotion if you want to lead well, help your team grow, or grow yourself. In this episode Don Neufeld, CTO of ClassPass, and I talk about why discomfort is so important, why constructive feedback doesn't have to be uncomfortable, and the right kinds of coaching questions to ask your team.  Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/2, or text DISCOMFORT to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

Are you ready to finally start spending real time solving the process or cultural problems causing big slowdowns in your team, organization, or company? This week I'm introducing you to Big Results. I'm joined by Leadership Coach Jean Hsu to talk about why we don't make time for these projects, even if we find them really exciting. And I'm teaching you the three-part formula for finally getting them done. Get the full shownotes and this episode's Podcast Guide at https://exceptional.vision/podcast/1, or text EXCITEMENT to 44222 to have the Podcast Guide delivered right to your email.

Welcome to Emotional Leadership, the podcast from Executive Coach and Software Engineering Leader Emily Leathers. Emotions are the high-achieving leader's secret weapon to getting more done, creating thriving teams, drastically lowering stress, and loving work. But we aren't taught anything about them in school or traditional management training. It's time to fix that. Join Emily and her guests each week to dive into how they experience a critical emotion at work, how to work with it instead of against it, and learn Emily's core tools for emotional health at work and at home.