Lords of Loud

“Songs that voices never shared, and no-one dared.” Lord Al, himself something of an experiment, leads us into an exploration of music that pushes all kinds of boundaries. Art imitates life and so does this podcast ...

A joke for Lord Ben: How many Beatles does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one (preferably Paul) holding the lightbulb still while the universe spins around him. The Lords examine Lord Ben's hypothefact that The Beatles get no respect.

A decade plus after #MeToo four men discuss fave females, just as we realise gender is an outdated concept. Isn't it ironic? Nah, it a riot (grrrl). Among others, Miss Sharon Jones brings the soul, Siouxsie Sioux the stranger things, and Martha Wainwright reminds us all to treat our daughters with some serious respect!

In an unusual turn of events, Lord Kev jauntily turns his gaze away from the pavement while the other Lords schlep along it instead. They can't quite come to grips with the bent bottle cap that is Stephen Malkmus' voice but goodness knows they try.

Lord Kev's course concludes with his personal top tracks from the last 25 years and 250 albums by the esoteric post-punk band famously described as "always different, always the same". How does an extricated Fall fan maintain the love, and can you even hear him over the soggy sounds of a Queensland summer night? Get your paper and pen; there will be questions at the end.

It's the most wonderful time of the year, dear listeners! The Lords climb down your chimney, deliver their albums of the year and gift each other Secret Santa tracks. As usual, we have the traditional LP giveaways, the obligatory random bickering and musical reviews of the year. Also, as you've been so good, a special treat: exclusive clips from the new Elektro Pinkler documentary, Hark the Neon Androids Sing. We ho-ho-hope you love it! Merry Xmas!

In a normal episode of Bizarro World, there's one band, with 3 for it and 1 against. In a normal episode.Enter: Lord Al. He takes a leaf out of Oprah's book, hooting excitedly and jabbing his finger at the other lords: You get a band! You get a band! You get a band!

Lord Ben drops another of his famed musical truth bombs claiming "There was only ever one punk band". The other lords grab their gas masks and take cover, scrambling for shreds of reason in a world gone mad. When the smoke clears and the first white dove flies free, who will be left standing to plant their flag, claiming the new reality as their own?

The Lords are back to do a few more doughies in the Oz Music carpark. There are some heavyweights in this collection and the Lords ponder what makes an act truly Aussie: is it if you're born here, move here, or just if you wear a pair of Stubbies now and then?

God bless little Billy and his Smashing Pumpkins. And his 'mellon collie' and his collie's infinite endless sadness. The lords break up this 90s classic into a leaner meaner version.

He was the best of Bens, he was the worst of Bens, he was the Ben of wisdom, he was the Ben of 80s ballads… tonight we say farewell to Lord Ben as he leaves on his journey to life's after-party.

The Lords explore the Oz rock and pop outback for acts that defined a musical genre worldwide, or created brand new genres that could only ever have come from the land down under. Ben goes straight down the middle of the road, Brett pogoes with punk pioneers, and Kev and Al get obscure and weird as per bloody usual mate.

Apart from heartache and bills, kids sometimes give their parents some tasty tunes. The fatherly Lords don the slippers and puff the pipe as they consider what their progeny have shared with them.

Strange times indeed! Back from iso, Lord Kev chooses an Album of the Week the others actually like, Brett counts in a second discussion on top drum tracks with a punk gem, Ben doesn't mention Ringo, and Lord Al, well, he was doing strange anyway – but are the others ready for a slab of gore grind?

The Lords celebrate the best drummer in the Stones with their favourite drumming moments of the great Charlie Watts.

Here's a riddle for you, dear listeners. What's the difference between sweaty nutsacks and the Lords of Loud? Sweaty nutsacks stick to briefs. Marvel at this week's attempt at Alpha Battle with the letter ‘G' and the topic of siblings.

Strap yourself in, here comes Lord Al with his musical dots. He is the gatekeeper, the Wizard of Oz, he is that wee guy that worked for the Tyrell corporation. After three previous episodes constantly disagreeing on the rules, this time the other Lords finally get to play the game with its genius creator. Surely the lion, the tin man and Dorothy will all be ready with the three yellow bricks that lead directly from Deicide to Seal. Surely!

The Lords serve up another slice of the four-string motherfudging pie as they revisit the best basslines of all time. However, does a bass “presence” actually constitute a bassline? Tune in and judge for yourself.

'Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone ...' He's gone and life will never be the same. But how will we remember the paradox that was Lord Al? What songs say what mere words could never express. And, from the ridiculous to the sublime: Lord Ben tells the tragic tale of the iconic jazz and swing queen known as Lady Day.

With a blast of icy sub-tropical wind slamming the door shut, the Lords huddle around their microphones for warmth. Will the skies ever be clear again? With only their shared respect for each other to keep them warm, there are obviously grim weeks of privation ahead. Also: the grease monkeys delve into the natural world to do a final tune-up on the topic of samples.

It seems three of the Lords have become dedicated followers of 90s retro rawk slags The Black Crowes, but Lord Brett is suddenly too squeaky clean for all that dirty leather. He scrapes the barrel for the rotten apples while the others pluck their tastiest tracks. Also: Lord Ben hops back on his prog log to travel the astral planes with Nektar.

Say, weren't you the singer who was found dead with old press clippings clutched in their hand and a trail of dried tears on their cheek? And with this question, the Lords have a look at some acts who are still kicking long after their peak, including some who surely must have made a pact with the Devil to last this long. Also: Lords Brett and Al have another listen to sound effects, this time from the built environment.

The Stones should be rolling in their graves! Having successfully carved up The Beatles' famous double LP, it's market season again and this time one of Lord Brett's sacred cows is lead up the ramp for a brutal trim job. Can the Lords turn this fatted calf into prize beef?  Each track is revalued and a lean, mean single LP is born. Mmm-mmm, that is a tasty burger!

The Lords step up and leap back into 1969 to explore the soundtrack to war, civil rights and some sweet times at the Riverdale sodapop shop – hey, just ask The Archies how good life was back then! Also this week: Lord Ben continues his descent into hell with the Carter Family.

Dearly beloved we are gathered once more to play tracks that would best eulogise a lost lord. Tonight we imagine the funeral songs for Lord Brett who has most likely perished in bizarre hairdressing incident. Also: Lord Kev looks at the life and times of the Icelandic phenomenon that is Bjork.

The Lord's pay tribute to those brave women who nurtured them through all their difficult phases when all Mum really wanted was to sit and listen to a spot of Lionel Ritchie now and then. Is it tea you’re looking for? Also: Ben rolls over the prog log to look at The Strawbs and their difficult band name decisions after rejecting The Mulbs, The Bluebs, and The Raspbpbpbpbs.

Welcome to Bizarroland where three of the Lords love a slice of Meatloaf, but Ben's gone vegan. Lord Ben does his best to play some really dodgy tracks while the others pull out the big hits and polish up the hidden gems. Also: the Grease Monkeys are back, oiling the nuts and loosening the bolts of sampling.

The Lords revisit the land of riffage to find a few more prime cuts. Well, at least Lord Al does – the others seem confused with navigating the topic and end up on Baker Street, for Pete’s sake! Also: Professor Kev takes us deeper into the learned abyss with The Fall 102.

Families are great. But what happens when you can’t tell Mum that your older brother sat on your face and farted? Such is the dilemma of being in a band with family: nobody cares as long as the good music keeps on coming. And as the Lords reveal this week, family-made music runs the gamut from the squeaky-clean to the down and dirty. Also: Lords Brett and Al continue their breakdown of breakdowns, and all the genres that love them.

It's as nerdy as need be when Lord Al whips out his icosihexagon and our four platonic solids face off, battling to the death over letter 'W'. Sounds simple of course but the Lords still can't agree on this basic premise and chaos ensues. Also: Lord Ben is found atop the spinning wheel this week. Listen if you dare to this demonic tale of fire and brimstone country music.

The Lords present live from the tail end of a long and emotionally overwrought series of wrap-up parties for the Grammys. Ben gives insightful analysis on Paul McCartney (again); Kev has his faith restored then shattered; Brett lines up a future political career; and Lord Al gets frisky with a mop called Tay-Tay...

It may be the loosest segment we do but still one of our faves. The Lords unearth gems by Wilco and Cornershop, Sinead O'Connor and Sheryl Crow. But who picked who? Also: Lords Al and Brett strip apart and get right inside bridges, breaks, middle eights and the mysterious pre-chorus.

Lord Ben challenges the others to name the magical links between mules and Bryan Ferry, with bonus points for following unknown and spontaneously developed rules. Also: Lord Kev hooks up his rod, sticks it in a barrel, and mixes up his metaphors to show us the catch of the day - Nick Cave and The Boys Next Door.

"Something happened on the day he died." Yes, all the other Lords had a right laugh. Tribute songs and words to help Lord Kev break on though to the other side. Also: Lords Al and Brett lube up and go elbow-deep into the working parts of popular music.

Why did the chicken join a band? Because it already had drumsticks. And if you liked that joke, you’ll love this episode as the Lords come to grips with a few of the best drum tracks around. Also: Lord Ben breaks out his magnifying glass and pocket knife to prise apart some choice specimens of prog music.

Join Lord Ben as he explores the tragic tale of Pete Ham. After being signed to The Beatles' Apple Records label and having some early success despite being in a band called Badfinger, Ham was eventually butchered by corrupt management.

Lords Al and Brett continue to poke and prod at music in this episode. Like two young lads with a ruler and not much else to do behind the school utility shed, they flop out a few songs and attempt to answer life’s burning questions: How long? How short? How fast? How slow? And where do you see yourself in 600 years from now?

Join Lord Ben as he explores the tragic tale of Judee Sill. Despite a life of drug abuse, armed robbery and prostitution, her beautiful and poetic music stands the test of time.

With a-one, and-a-two, and-a-three, and-a-four, and-a-five... Lords Brett and Al bar up as they measure their music with time signatures. Nothing gets these guys primed like counting out the beats while a song plays. So dust off the leather cuffs, break out the meter stick and let the beatings begin!

The spiced ham of Christmas Specials is here again! The Lords know that sharing is caring so gift albums are dispersed, some choice memories of 2020 are passed around, and Christmas hits are dug out of the charity bin of yesteryear. The Lords are also blessed with a special live performance by international guest stars. Prepare to pick glitter off your ears for the next month ‘cause the Lords are sending goodies down your headphones!

In the season finale as anticipation builds to fever pitch, Lord Ben finally blesses us with his Top 10 Albums of all time. The other Lords, thinking they have his measure decide to run a bingo competition on the side. Also: Lord Kev has a crack at Turn the Page by flipping through an old Post magazine, potentially saving the segment from being boned next season.

What can you say about Lord Al’s closet that hasn’t already been said? Better yet, are his musical choices better left unsaid? The Lords debate this topic once again and also give props to the hidden King/Queen of Rock ‘n’ Roll, d-d-be-bop-a-bop: the bassline.

Ben misses the brief! Brief missed by Ben. Ben = not brief. Lord Ben: brief; missed. In other news lots of top songs about The Devil and the letter T. The evil theme also leads us into a song-stealing frenzy. As always there are no real winners, just four losers. Also, the good vibes return with another set of fave TV themes: 1 banana, 2 banana, 3 banana, 4!

The world was still reeling from the impact of Windows 95 and the introduction of Sabrina the Teenage Witch when 1997 appeared on the doorstep. Remember getting’ jiggy with it to the Spicestein classic “Du Wannabe”? Us neither. But it would’ve been pretty fly, yeah? Also in this episode, Kev challenges the Lords to string it together between 90s icons Deee-Lite and Marky Mark.

Seems the complex concept of 'Your Top 10 Albums' is harder to grasp than you'd think. This week it's Lord Kev's effort and he completely forgets (a) all but two of the decades of popular music, (b) to put his albums in any kind of order, and (c) a whole stack of the acts he says he loves. Points for trying. Also: "Nobody does it better" you say? Another round of our favourite covers ... and Tainted Love.

What’s creepier than the film clip for Michael Jackson’s “The way you make me feel”? The Lords’ Halloween Special! Don your mask and grab your broomstick while the Lords hand out the treats. Lord Kev also turns out his pockets to reveal a bunch of obscure bands. The other lords respond: Again?

Been a long time since Lord Al dragged a half-baked discussion topic out his rusty oven. Some might say: not long enough! Undaunted, the Lords pick tracks by word association to the famous classification terms, and reveal more of their busted psyches than you ever wanted to know. Also: our favourite movie theme songs. Let us know yours!

The Lords polish up the disco ball and head back to 1979. Perhaps it was all the static electricity in the polyester shirts, perhaps the impending flicking of the calendar into the high-octane 80s, but it was a charged and turbulent time for music. Also: the Lords ride the white pony down to the corner of Drugs St and Music Ave.

On this weeks episode we find out who was the chick magnet out of Simon and Garfunkel, then against better judgement we delve back into Lord Al's closet to uncover turds that prove too hard to polish.

The great puzzle is how this episode isn’t chock full of Led Zeppelin. The Lords all slap their meatiest riffs on the table and wield air guitars to honour the gods of rock. Kev even whips out a fuzzy Scottish python. Oo-er! Also: Lord Ben flicks through an ancient tome to reveal that there are more than two Beatles.

The Lords make the mistake of asking Lord Al to pick his top 10 albums. He reveals a brazen lack of certitude that leaves the other Lords wondering how he manages to choose matching socks each day. Also: Lord Brett lays down a challenge to find the connection between the M.O.R. Prince and the sexily funky Phil Collins.