Jen AF (Funny, Comedy)

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Sex, relationships, and unfiltered, unsolicited, personal and professional advice delivered sarcastically through the mouth of a sailor. From channeling unapologetic "big d*ck energy," to regrettable tattoos, to trolling for sugar daddies, Jen Fassino shares her funny situations, pet peeves, rants, raves, and the scoop you never asked for but will be so glad you heard. Follow along and listen every Tuesday, for stories that navigate life’s trivial inconveniences and will give you nostalgia in a way you never knew existed. Who knows, Jen might just do a solid and prank call that loser ex that ghosted you.

Jen Fassino


    • Jan 19, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • monthly NEW EPISODES
    • 28m AVG DURATION
    • 51 EPISODES


    Latest episodes from Jen AF (Funny, Comedy)

    DMV Serial Killers

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 19, 2022 19:39


    I'd rather sh*t in my hands and clap than go to the DMV. Anyone else? Jen gears up for her cross country road trip and shares tips on how not to get murdered by your DMV attendant.

    Pump And Dump

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2022 17:12


    Botox, and filler, and lasers oh MY! Jen got some "work" done this week and is spilling the tea on what she had done. She also dives deep into the art of picking up women if you're one of or single gentlemen listeners.

    My Neighbor Is The Devil

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 5, 2022 22:01


    How well do you know your neighbors? Jen finally comes face to face with her neighbors from upstairs. I think the title says it all...

    Food > Sex

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 29, 2021 20:56


    Has a man ever told you that sex is better than food? Run away Linda, you're in for a lifetime of jack-hammering and Taco Bell. Jen also covers her Christmas events, expressing her distaste for Christmas themed IG posts, and talks New Years Eve plans and why Limousines are so boomer.

    Gifts For People You Hate

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 22, 2021 17:31


    Merry Christmas ya filthy animals! Tune in to hear the ultimate gift giving guide for people you hate, and decoding failed relationships through Facebook posts. Buckle up, Santa is coming to town!

    The Return Of The F*ck Boy

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 14, 2021 12:47


    How many of you have ever received a DM from one of your best friends ex-boyfriends being an idiot? Listen in to see how Jen handles it.

    Nothing Good Happens After Midnight

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 7, 2021 24:50


    Jen is back from her Miami work trip and shares the art of scamming your way into private parties, gives away her sugar daddy networking tips, and talks overall travel hacks for "business women." You won't be disappointed.

    Miami Or Bust

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2021 11:26


    Raise your hand if you've ever tried a new self tanner hours before an important work trip so it's a 50/50 chance you look like a oompa loompa? Asking for a friend. Jen books a last minute flight to Miami to join her Clubhouse friends, talks shoes, tacky jewelry and other nonsense...

    Is This Considered Cheating?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 23, 2021 15:45


    A quick and dirty episode on the "is this considered cheating" debate. Listen and weigh in with your thoughts. Jen also gives tips to the MEN who listen to her podcast on how to "play chess, not checkers" when it comes to strategies on how to pick up women in unconventional ways...

    Mall Kiosk Fights

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2021 22:46


    Have you ever gotten into an altercation with a mall kiosk employee when you were just minding your own business? Do people even still go to malls? Jen reveals what went down at her local mall, predicts a persons mental stability based on their phone case, and her and Robert fight about a pressing issue... 

    Wedding Faux Pas

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 9, 2021 19:34


    Have you ever wondered what to buy for a wedding gift, how to pick the perfect date, and tips for dressing the part as a "rich women of class" on a budget? Well turn this up, Linda- this one's for you!

    69 Is NOT Fine

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2021 26:49


    Jen is going to get "canceled" for these unpopular opinions she is openly admitting on this weeks episode. Get ready to be "triggered" and jump into her Instagram DM's to start an internet keyboard war and tell her how much you hate her and disagree...she's ready for it!

    Trick Or Treating For D*ck

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 26, 2021 21:20


    Modern day "ghosting stories," how to avoid being a basic b*tch Halloween decorator, and trick or treating strategies for the adults. Jen also rewrites your favorite Goosebumps books to fit the narrative of women's most terrifying and spooky dating situations...

    Birthday Sex

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2021 24:20


    Raise your hand if you've ever received a passive aggressive, unwanted, overly thoughtless gift card from a lazy family member? It's Jen's birthday and she talks proper gift giving etiquette, age appropriate birthday attire, and shares tips for single girls to get even more free sh*t on their special day. Wanna get Jen a gift? Here's her Amazon Wish List: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2G25CYWEM97P7?ref_=wl_share

    My Biggest Pet Peeves

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 12, 2021 27:40


    Awful bumper stickers, unnecessary fashion accessories, and poor bathroom etiquette! She goes off on a tangent of her biggest peeves that she simply can't keep within anymore. Jen also confesses to a crime that she committed and discovers the damaging ramifications years later. Her 36th birthday is in 7 days and has her link to her "interesting" and "extra-circular" Amazon Wish List. Curious? Click the link and shop her list. You might just get a personalized shout out on next week's show... AMAZON LINK: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2G25CYWEM97P7?ref_=wl_share

    OMG, My Pubes

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 5, 2021 26:47


    Jen is back on her solo episode bullsh*t. This week- she talks about trolling strangers while on her trip home to Wisconsin, her revealing texts to Robert, and how to "ease into" being sl*tty. 

    My Disapproving Mother Is A Guest On My Podcast

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 29, 2021 43:57


    Hell has officially frozen over when Patty, Jen's mother, reluctantly agrees to be a guest on this weeks episode. This is one for the history books! She hates her podcast in a big way and isn't afraid to tell her why for everyone to hear... Sh*t gets real while they talk about Jen's ex boyfriends, what she was like in high school, and other embarrassing stories.

    How To Land A Rich Man: The Sugar Daddy Chronicles

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 21, 2021 26:47


    Attention all single ladies & fabulously gay men: This is the only guide you'll ever need to land yourself a rich man, yes ma'am! Jen assigns homework to help jumpstart your hunt for sugar daddies and how to locate them according to where you live. You can't afford to miss this...LITERALLY!

    Insanely Genius Dating Tips

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 14, 2021 29:41


    If you're single- you definitely can't afford to skip this episode! Jen drops the ultimate dating tip that has her friends landing men left and right! She also talks about her 24 hour trip to LA for a "special" haircut, and searches for that perfect slutty fall wedding guest dress... 

    The Bougiest Thing I‘ve Ever Done + Sphynx Cat Status

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2021 32:52


    This bougie bitch has outdone herself this week! Do you have a guess as to what the bougiest thing she's done is? It's pretty ridiculous, but she's quite proud of it. Jen also schools the children on a new "Urban Dictionary" phrase she coined and hopes you'll add it to your vocabulary repertoire. 

    My Future In-Laws Hate Me

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 31, 2021 22:04


    On this weeks episode, Jen discovers what her in-laws really think about her- and she is SHOOK! She also picked up a new nickname from Robert, and talks about reactivating her old "finsta" account on IG and what she uses it for... www.jenafpodcast.com

    A Finger In The B*tt Doesn‘t Make You A Sl*t

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2021 30:04


    Don't act like you've never asked yourself the age old question: "does a finger in the butt, make me a slut?" Well, on this weeks episode, Jen reveals the real answer. She shares her cheap, on the fly DIY beauty tips that will save you just in time for a big event. Minimal effort, big impact. From hot girl summer do's & don'ts, insightful Venmo memo lines to spark conversations at the dinner table, and humanitarian acts for strangers. She's a regular Mother Theresa.

    Trolling For Sugar Daddies

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 17, 2021 32:16


    It's a slow week here at the Fassino-Chambers household. So Jen decides to enlighten us all on the art of nabbing a super rich, online Sugar Daddy and tricking them into giving you a monthly allowance. Get your notebooks OUT! She also covers her weird shower behaviors that Robert likes, and talks about what she expects her guests to do at her wedding...

    Questionable Life Choices

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2021 29:38


    Jen is on the move again traveling to Phoenix for her friend's "Dirty 30" birthday weekend... and let me tell you- it was definitely dirty! Jen comes home with a questionable illness, $300 in casino winnings, and a terrible dinner experience. She also talks tips on being an "easy, breezy, go with the flow girl" and her most recent and embarrassing life choice...

    B*tthole Botox

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 4, 2021 33:17


    Better late than never! Ya girl never misses a week- sorry not sorry it was later then expected. Let's break down a few beauty remedies to beat the heat here in Austin and combat horrendous body perspiration. Curious? Jen also exposes the true cut off age (and inner psychology) of men installing after market subwoofers, and talks pretending to make multiple phone calls to avoid talking to people and creating unnecessary “drama.” Buckle up!

    Jennifer Beals Read My Fortune

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2021 27:56


    Have you ever wondered about the magic properties of cootie catchers, M.A.S.H, and plastic 8-balls filled with toxic blue liquid? Jen recounts the happenings of a few of her high school slumber parties, and how they shaped her into the women she is today. Jen also discusses the debate between being a p*ssy and having balls. The whole narrative just doesn't add up...

    Tall Buildings Make Me Horny

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 20, 2021 33:11


    Instagram captions, c*caine espresso, and Rock of Love legends, OH MY! A mismatched collection of random topics per usual. A slow week for Jen translates to her full Karen mode coming out over mild inconveniences that she experiences during the day, and rambling about her inner thoughts. Riveting.

    Penny Marshall‘s Penthouse

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 13, 2021 38:07


    Ya girl is back home from NYC after a 2 week "sabbatical" of whoring around the city. She visits her friends in all corners of Manhattan, tells her 4th of July story, and trolls her mom on Instagram stories while on her solo day trip to Montauk. 

    Regrettable Tattoo

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 6, 2021 26:31


    Jen is in NYC this week and finally pre-batched an episode so she wouldn't have to record while in the city. What does she discuss this week? Well- a questionable life choice in her early 20's has people asking "are you ok" or "what is that?" while she's in her swimsuit. Hey, we all do stupid things, but a few of hers are visible...and the other is not. ;) Jen also touches on her hatred of baths and naps like a lunatic. Buckle up!

    Sl*tty Outfits

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2021 30:08


    Jen gears up for her trip to NYC for two weeks and talks IG fashion, and online shopping frustrations & realizations. A typical fake, made-up scenario plays out in Jen's head and has her asking how she'd fake her own death given the opportunity to do so. Julia Roberts could never.

    Ex Boyfriend's

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 22, 2021 37:03


    Jen just landed back in Austin after being in Wisconsin for 12 days. She talks typical small town drama, shares client stories, along with asking the age old question- "are you friends with your exes?" Curious? Listen along to the ramblings of a sleep deprived idiot barely making the cut off to launch this episode. It's been a week, ma'am!

    PRIDE + Karaoke Microphone

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2021 0:05


    Bottom of the barrel sh*t right here! Jen is "reporting live" from her WI studio and the audio quality is sub-par. This episode was thrown together last minute because your girl doesn't want to miss a week and not give you the riveting content you're craving. I've. Had. Better! Learn how Jen gets in trouble for harassing people she knows and one new special person she just met with her newest Amazon purchase...

    You Peaked In High School

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 8, 2021 32:10


    Are these episode titles intriguing you yet? Jen's at it again talking "chicken cutlets" AKA sticky t*ts, and bottling that climatic feeling you get when you run into someone you hate that's doing worst than you. It's called Karma Linda- and it's got you by the balls. Jen also touches on her upcoming weekend plans that might land her in some hot water. But at least she'll look good while doing it... Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Fighting Miles Teller

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 1, 2021 34:37


    In this episode, Jen starts out slow with talking "hot girl summer" problems- then brings it home by discussing the time she almost got into a fist fight with the actor, Miles Teller at EP & LP in Weho. Yeah- she went there! Not sure how we got here, but here we are. She also talks about her new "influencer" position, AND her "love" of long fake nails, and babies that have their own Facebook pages. Buckle up, this episode is all over the place! Jen's Amazon Affiliates link is linked below to receive more discounts when you purchase items on Amazon. Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    European D*ck

    Play Episode Listen Later May 25, 2021 28:48


    Humanitarian acts, dick-game stories, new work announcements, and talking sh*t! We're definitely heading down an interesting path on the podcast today and dropping TMI gems all over the place. WHOOPS! #sorrynotsorry Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Cat-fishing

    Play Episode Listen Later May 18, 2021 26:10


    Names have been changed to protect the "guilty"... well, at least for now! Jen rants about a few DM's she has received over the past week and makes a public service announcement. She touches on the art of "cat-fishing" and how it's used in everyday life. You know who you are. ;)   Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Fake

    Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2021 41:10


    Oh man- Jen is feeling spicy and has a lot to say on this episode. It could very well be her best episode yet! She covers everything from answering the age old question: "Are they real or are they fake," playing out scenarios of hypothetical situations, sexual greeting cards, and addressing a few incidents that severely p*issed her off this week. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Satan Neighbor

    Play Episode Listen Later May 4, 2021 35:14


    Jen discovers her upstairs neighbor has taken up "singing" and is conjuring Satan himself to her back patio. Snow White could never! Robert gets "recognized" by one of his "fans" in public while we're out on the town. She also shares her newest prestigious accomplishment of being featured in a national magazine for everything BUT having a great rack! Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Girls Gone Wild

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2021 32:39


    If this episode title is wrong, I don't want to be right! With a name like that- you can only imagine what Jen discusses this week. We'll leave this episode description a little less "padded" so you can draw your own conclusions and listen to this extraordinarily brilliant track. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    My Business Scam

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2021 44:23


    JEN IS IN LA! "Jenny LA is back on her bullsh*t and spending $18 on a grocery store salad. But first- learn how to properly write a "professional" email to an unsatisfactory customer... We cover everything from how to tell if a guy actually has money, my ability to get my friends laid, and being a fake OnlyFans girl.   Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Goldilocks Pubes

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 13, 2021 33:17


    Is anyone even listening to this podcast? We've made it to episode 10- Holy sh*t! On this episode, Jen talks about her new favorite coined word and how it came to be. She also lightly touches on her stance with children AKA- crotch goblins, trolls her sweet boyfriend, and discusses her latest pet peeve that no one cares about. She also gets ready to board a plane to LA…   Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Bikinis And Bullsh*t

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 6, 2021 39:20


    Jen proves that a LOT can happen within the 7 days since she's last released an episode. Join the conversation about the moral code of having "sticky fingers" at well respected restaurants, and extremely accurate Grindr GPS. Who's Yolanda? The worst c*nt on the planet- that's who! Jen also invokes her inner Dick Tracy to solve a Venmo infidelity... Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog    

    My Armie Hammer Encounter

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 30, 2021 37:19


    Jen gets down and dirty and talks about her "run in" with Armie Hammer, and tells us why he's off her "sorry 'bout it" list. She also goes over her most recent Instagram post and addresses a few of the things she's into and a peek into her personal life. Oh- and we hear what it's like to work as Caesar Milan's personal assistant on an out of town gig. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Spencer's Gift's Vibrator's + Justin Anderson's Office

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 23, 2021 33:32


    Jen confesses a funny "LA incident" that will probably land her in hot water-but f*ck it- it makes for good radio. Enough time has past where the statute of limitations are no longer applicable. Remember Spencer's at your local mall? Yep Jen worked at one back in her college years- are you surprised? She also induces her new Patreon account where you're able to pay her to to roast your friends, or have her make a call on your behalf to your dirtbag ex! Scroll down in the show notes to read more.   Patreon account link: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Tip + Donate: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/tip-donate Shop Jen's favorite things: http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    P*ssy Weed

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2021 23:48


    Jen is sleep deprived after her flight home from Wisconsin and is reaching for low hanging fruit with this episode. We've had better. She talks craziest client stories about woman losing things in their vagina's, parasitic friendships, and questioning her past outfit choices. It's a doozy! Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Reading F*ck Boy DM‘s

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 9, 2021 32:22


    Jen catches a flight to Wisconsin this week and reads the unsolicited DM's from a f*ck boy she met 16 years ago. Learn the "3 looks" you see at the airport and how to spot a "h**ker" (AKA a pro athlete's side piece) and acquire a $2000 pashmina. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Caitlyn Jenner‘s Dog Sitter

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2021 42:49


    Jen talks about the moment Robert finds out she used to be a drag performer in a past life. Does he stick around? But, most importantly- does she have what it takes to be the next Drag SUPERSTAR??? Find out how Kevin connected us to Caitlyn Jenner, and is now considered LA dog royalty and kind of a big deal. Jen finally comes clean and opens up about her infamous "emotional" La Scala chop salad story. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Beating Dr. Phil‘s Son At Beer Pong

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 23, 2021 40:34


    Jen discusses the time she encountered a micro-p*nis for the first time. Curious who it belongs to? You'll have to listen and see. She also gets vulnerable, and laughs about getting food poisoning at Paradise Cove in Malibu, and talks Jordan McGraw's 2016 sub-par beer pong skills. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Robert + Edibles + Valentine's Day

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 16, 2021 36:52


    What do you do when you're trapped in a snow storm and have to cancel your Valentine's Day plans? Take an edible with your boyfriend, jump on the microphone, and say whatever comes to mind. Jen divorces Robert for not knowing the most basic pop-culture references, they discuss their “Sorry ‘Bout It List,” and reveal part of their inner dysfunctional relationship dynamic. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    Seducing My Middle School Crush + Working As Gary Busey's Hairstylist

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 16, 2021 47:08


    Get ready for the sh*t show! Introductions will be made, stories will be told, and her mother is going to call and say she should have been a bl*w job. We're setting the bar high for the first episode. Listen as Jen recounts seducing her middle school crush, her fancy new career as a real life “Influencer,” and working exclusively as Gary Busey's new hairstylist. She'll even reveal where she sends all the unsolicited dick-pics she's received… Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

    The Jen AF Trailer: Welcome To The Sh*t Show

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 31, 2021 2:14


    Meet Jen. She's an insightful idiot with the mouth of a sailor, and a low threshold for toxic "influencer" culture. Get ready to discuss everything from daily struggles as a millennial, pop-culture, hilarious stories, and dating tragedies. Nothing is off limits. Patreon Account: https://www.patreon.com/jenafpodcast Buy me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jenaf Shop Jen's favorite things :http://www.jenafpodcast.com/blog

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