The New Muslim's Field Guide Podcast

Every Ramadan, the question is posed to us: is Ramadan about doing the most possible—prayers, charity, Qur'an recitation—or is it about slowing down and experiencing God in a deeper way? In other words, is the quantity of your worship that's more important to God, or the quality of it? In this episode Kaighla and Theresa talk about what, exactly, counts as worship (clue: it's way broader than you'd think), advise new converts to work on a few small acts of worship they can keep up rather than going all in, full force, in an impossible-to-sustain fever, and discuss the importance of recognizing and embracing the season of life wherein you find yourself this Ramadan.

More than any other time of the year, Ramadan is an excellent opportunity to see yourself for who you really are, warts and all. This can and should create a healthy sense of guilt if you've spent the year neglecting your soul through sin or by neglecting your prayers and other required acts of worship. But that guilt can turn into an unhealthy shame when we allow our worst choices to define our identity, and worse, when we imagine God sees us the way we see ourselves. In this episode, Theresa and Kaighla advise us on the importance of forgiving ourselves for the choices we've made, remind us that we are more than our worst choices, and explain the key difference between guilt (which is good) and shame (which is really, really bad).

Fasting in Ramadan is required for every Muslim unless he or she has a valid excuse. Prayer, though, is, without a doubt, the central practice of a Muslim's life, but there are lots of Muslims (and especially new Muslims) who struggle to maintain a healthy prayer habit, even in Ramadan. In this episode, Kaighla and Theresa discuss why prayer even matters, discuss the question of if it even makes sense to fast if you're not praying, explore the ways one can establish a healthy prayer habit, share helpful tips to focusing in your prayer, and talk about why it's not cool to judge the "Ramadan Muslims" you may know cuz hey... you don't live their life.

It's so easy in Ramadan to think only of yourself, your needs, your hunger, the ways you're struggling, etc. In this Ramadan Tips episode, Theresa and Kaighla advise new Muslims to find a way to make Ramadan about others and their needs. Theresa suggests a novel way to get your foot in the door with the local Muslim community, Kaighla tells a story of a time someone took the chance in Ramadan to make a major difference in her life, and they remind new Muslims of the balance of Islam and the importance of also making sure one's own needs are met.

God says again and again throughout the Quran that mankind is perpetually forgetful and ungrateful. One of the hardest parts about Ramadan is keeping an attitude of gratitude, when it's so much easier to dwell on what you don't have, on what hurts, on what you miss about non-Ramadan days. In this Ramadan Tips episode, Theresa reminds us to be specifically grateful to the tiniest of things in life, Kaighla tells a story about an experience that made her super grateful for running water, and we discuss the way Ramadan resets our attitude about the role of food.

In a world full of instagram shots and Facebook posts and Twitter snark, it can feel like you're the only one struggling, as if you're the only one truly having hard time dealing with being hungry, and even as if there is something wrong with you if your faith doesn't protect you from those feelings of hunger. In this Ramadan Tips episode, Theresa and Kaighla talk about the true picture of Ramadan (clue: it's not as glamorous as people would have you believe), the unhealthy social media atmosphere that creates this "I am never hungry in Ramadan!" competition, and ways to cope with the hunger that will, inevitably come for you.

Why do we even do Ramadan? In this episode, Kaighla regales us with the story of the night that Prophet Muhammad received the first revelation of the Qur'an. It happened in Ramadan, and this sacred month was never the same after that. Why did God reveal the Qur'an to us? Because he wanted us to ponder on it and reflect on its wisdom. Theresa and Kaighla talk about the importance of remembering the true focus of Ramadan: the Qur'an.

Ramadan is hard (listen to episode #13 for more on that). But when you tell yourself you can't do it, or you listen to people with their, "OMG! I could never do that!" and "Not even water?!" talk, it can start to feel, especially for new Muslims, like yeah, hey, maybe this is too hard! STOP IT! In this Ramadan Tips episode, Kaighla and Theresa talk about the many ways we sabotage our own success with negative self-talk, ways to combat the beast inside, and the true meaning of "success" and "failure" in Ramadan.

God specifically said regarding #Ramadan that He intends ease for us. So why is Ramadan so hard, and should it be this hard? Are we doing something wrong, or does it mean our imaan (faith) is low? In this episode Theresa  and Kaighla talk about the realities that make Ramadan truly hard, especially for new Muslims, the true meaning of that verse, and the importance of keeping things in perspective, as well as offer encouragement that we can, indeed, do hard things. We're here to tell you, 17 + 9 Ramadans in that things do, in fact, get easier with time.

Listen, God is not interested in making you suffer for funsies. Not eating or drinking or sexing from sunup to sundown is good for your soul, and it's not even about the food and such, it's about one thing and one thing only: drawing you nearer to your Creator. And nothing draws you closer to your Creator than submitting yourself and your nafs to Him in worship and in prayer. God loves it when we ask Him for what we need, when we thank Him for our countless blessings, and when we cry to Him in our tribulation, because God loves it when we draw near to Him. In this episode, we discuss the power of du'a, tell stories of times when God has answered our du'a in unexpected ways, and remind you to make a du'a to-do list, which is exactly what it sounds like: a list of things to make du'a to God for, and why it's super important to remember others, both your loved ones and complete strangers, in your du'as. 

One unfortunate side-effect of fasting is dehydration, especially if you're not getting the water you need (yes, specifically water. listen to Ramadan Tip #3 for more on that). And one unfortunate side-effect of being dehydrated is brain fog. In this episode, Theresa and Kaighla explore ways to combat brain fog, especially when having a foggy brain is your non-fasting default anyway.

So you've determined, based on a chat with your medical professional, that fasting is something you can't take part in without damaging your health long-term. Or you're pregnant or breast-feeding and you (and your doctor) have determined it's not ok for the baby. Now what? Kaighla and Theresa discuss in this Ramadan Tips episode ways you can experience Ramadan, regardless of your inability to fast, including suggestions of ways to emulate that experience of going without in order to deeply re-examine your dependencies. Kaighla tells a story about one Ramadan where she was forced to make a peculiar change and the wonderful results, and we look at the history of previous peoples skipping fasting for less-than-legit reasons, and ways we can avoid following in their footsteps.

Here at The New Muslim's Field Guide Podcast, we're all about meeting you where you are. As much as the Muslim community likes to sweep these things under the rug and act as if none of us struggles with addiction, there are so many Muslims trying to fast in Ramadan while also coping with nicotine and caffeine withdrawal. Sure, coffee is a halal drug, but cigarettes and such aren't, but both leave you with serious, physical symptoms when you don't get your fix. In this Ramadan Tips episode, Kaighla and Theresa share some tips on coping with caffeine and nicotine withdrawal in Ramadan, as well as ways to beat the addictions in the long run.The New Muslim's Field Guide vocab word of the day is dua—Supplication or prayer, talking to or asking God for something. @1:44 Theresa talks about what she does about her caffeine addition during Ramadan. Drinking coffee may be too much liquid to put in your stomach when you also need to fit food and water in there. Another option if you must have caffeine, would be to drink a 5-hour energy. Less liquid. This was a tip Kaighla gave to Theresa in a non-podcast chat. ;)@2:26 Theresa and Kaighla talk about not smoking during the day in Ramadan and also outside of fasting hours. All things that hurt your body are sins (a sin is something that hurts you so this makes sense) and fasting and sinning don't go together. Hurting yourself is never a good idea and always a sin, but especially during fasting. Why give up the halal things when you aren't even giving up the haram?

It's 3:59a.m. and your alarm has gone off to let you know it's time to pray Fajr, and you've missed Suhoor... again. *distant, eery screams*Theresa and Kaighla have been where you are—Kaighla missed Suhoor (the morning meal just before starting your fast, eaten before dawn) just this morning, in fact! As much as it feels like you may die, we're here to tell you that while it's gonna suck, hard, you will (probably, inshaAllah) survive. We discuss ways to prevent missing Suhoor, great tips for making the most of this important meal, and the question of what to do if you do miss it, as well as handling things when you enjoyed your halal spouse in the night and didn't get a chance to make ghusl (ritual full-bath required before prayer after sex) before Fajr.The New Muslim's Field Guide vocab word of the day is suhoor—The predawn meal that is eaten before the day of fasting begins. Sahoor is eaten just before sunrise/fajr. Check out this video on how to make Ghusl.@ 0:39 Theresa says that you have to be very careful when you have to wake up at 4:30 in the morning. This is just an example. Not everyone will be eating or waking up at the same time. Your time will very based on your location. Go to www.islamicfinder.org to find out when you should stop eating (Fajrtime). @ 1:08 Kaighla jokes that if your dog licks your face, go make wudu if you're a “shaf'i”. Imam Ash-Shafi'i is the founder of one of many schools of thought, and those who follow his school of thought are of the opinion that dog saliva is najis (impure) and makes everything it touches (clothes, skin, dishes) impure, too. Read more here.@ 4:36 Kaighla talks about “Halal sexing.” Sex with your spouse is prohibited during fasting in the daylight hours of Ramadan, but perfectly halal at night. Just make sure you're not still in the act when Fajr begins.@ 5:30 Kaighla talks about when she first converted and she would accidentally swallow water during wudu. If you do accidentally swallow water, this doesn't break your fast. Actions are by judged by intentions and if you slipped up not intending to swallow something, you are not held accountable. @ 6:25 Kaighla says that you don't have to have ghusl to start fasting. Read more about that here.

Fasting is hard for us all, but for some people, it can be dangerous. But for a new Muslim, it's often difficult to decipher the advice one gets from the aunties in the masjid, one's Muslim friends, the imam, and other laymen on just how sick you need to be, and in what way, for your illness to excuse you from fasting. In this Ramadan Tips episode, Kaighla and Theresa discuss the myriad illnesses, both physical and mental, which can excuse someone from fasting, the importance of seeking sound medical advice from a medical professional, and offer encouragement and reminders of Allah's mercy.

Ramadan fasting brings out all the feels. When you take away food, water, sex, and other fun coping mechanisms, all the deep, uncomfortable emotions you typically suppress find a way out of you, often in the form of anger, rage, sorrow, anxiety, and other fun stuff. Theresa gives a great tip on coping with hanger, and talks about the importance of respecting it while still refusing to allow it to dictate your emotions. Kaighla tells a story of a time she finally gained control of her emotions in Ramadan and how that improved life ten-fold.

Allah says he loves the smell of a fasting person's breath, but Lord knows other people don't appreciate it. In this episode, Kaighla and Theresa give some helpful tips on curbing your stanky breath and protecting the innocent. Theresa suggests an age-old trick, and Kaighla suggests a novel idea, albeit facetiously.The New Muslim's Field Guide Vocab word of the day is Niqab—Face veil, Often seen worn by Saudi women. It is not a required part of hijab, but it is a woman's choice if she'd like to cover her face.@ 2:37 Theresa recommends buying a miswak on Amazon. Here is a link to some miswak with holders that is Prime eligible. And here is a video on how to use it@ 4:06 Kaighla talks about swallowing saliva. She is just saying you don't need to spit all day long b.c. you are naturally, unconsciously producing saliva. This is natural and does not break the fast. But, generally, when fasting, don't intentionally collect your saliva in your mouth just to have something to drink. 

In this Ramadan tips episode, Theresa and Kaighla offer honest, sincere advice to those Muslims who are trying to fast + pray in Ramadan when they are secretly Muslim. What should you do if your boss/family/friends don't know you're Muslim? Kaighla tells a story of a time she had to take a leap of faith much like what a new Muslim has to when people find out they've converted, and how that turned out for her.Note: We both use the phrase "in the closet" to refer to people who have not been able to come out and tell people about their decision to convert. We mean no offense and have no intention of downplaying the very real struggle people face when they are in-the-closet homosexuals. There just isn't a better phrase for what it's like to hide a core aspect of your identity from the people you love.@3:43 Theresa says that "actions are based on intentions." This is based on an authentic hadith (or saying from Prophet Muhammad) wherein he said: "Actions are according to intentions, and everyone will get what was intended. Whoever migrates with an intention for Allah and His messenger, the migration will be for the sake of Allah and his Messenger. And whoever migrates for worldly gain or to marry a woman, then his migration will be for the sake of whatever he migrated for."[Bukhari & Muslim]@4:14 Theresa says that Prophet Abraham's family "threw him into the fire." This is based on the Qur'anic story found in 21:51-71.@2:35 Kaighla mentions that the first converts were forced into the mountains and starved out by their own family, and that for the first 3 years of revelation, everyone was secretly Muslim. This is based on stories in Seerah An-Nabawi, authentic recordings of the lives of Prophet Muhammad and the early Muslims.@6:14 Theresa says that if something is harder, you get more reward for doing it. This is based on a hadith specifially about trying to read the Qur'an in Ramadan. Verily the one who recites the Qur'an beautifully, smoothly, and precisely, he will be in the company of the noble and obedient angels. And as for the one who recites with difficulty, stammering or stumbling through its verses, then he will have TWICE that reward.” [Bukhari and Muslim]

In this Ramadan tip episode, Theresa and Kaighla remind listeners to listen to your mama's nagging advice and drink that water. They reminisce  about their own first Ramadans and the ways they made things harder on themselves by breaking their fast with Coke, pop, soda, and other sugar-laden, sometimes carbonated drinks, and how those dietary choices just made things more sluggish.The New Muslim's Field Guide vocab word of the day is Asr—the afternoon prayer. It is the third of the five daily prayers. Theresa's sound quality is not great. She apologizes for that. Her computer microphone is a joke, but she is still glad to have it, Alhamdulillah. @1:27 Theresa says "coke" in reference to all sodas or pop. Coke is the word used for these things in her neck of the woods. @1:34 Theresa says "coca-cola, airheads, and other breads". She meant to say "and other carbs". She is a Carb-oholic. @2:35 Kaighla mentions her time in Egypt when she was breaking her fast with fruit-flavored, sugar water. As in, not actual fruit juice, but more like Kool-Aid. As a rule, fruit juices are high sugar. Real fruit juices retain some of the vitamins that make fruit good for you, but they are also missing a lot of the stuff that makes whole fruit healthy, like the fiber. So they are not a great choice during Ramadan when you have limited time to eat and limited space in your stomach.  Coke, coffee, tea, and many other beverages contain caffeine. Caffeine is a diuretic. Diuretics promote the increased urination, meaning it expels water from your body quicker than your body naturally would.Dates, bananas, and other foods high in potassium help you retain water in your body. So they are great to eat any time of the year but especially in Ramadan. 

In this second episode, Theresa and Kaighla discuss the debate around whether or not people need to be reading the Qur'an in Arabic to reap the benefits. They talk about why it's so important for new Muslims to read the Qur'an in their own language, but also the power of listening to the Qur'an being recited in Arabic, and the way doing both makes your prayers in the masjid more meaningful. Theresa confesses something many of us can relate to.Important point: These is no such thing as an English translation of the Quran. The Quran loses a lot when it is translated from Arabic to any language. Only the original Arabic is considered the Quran. The English meaning of the Quran is just the closest approximation of the meaning of the Quran in its original form. And this is what we mean when we say read an English Translation, read the closest approximate meaning in your own language. @2:45 Kaighla talks about resources for native English listening to Quran in Arabic and English. Here (http://www.quranful.com/) is a great site where you can choose which reciter you enjoy most and also here the English interpretation of the Quran. @ 5:00 Theresa talks about being confused by the Quran and how she came to understand it. Read her full story here (http://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/understanding-islam/confused-by-the-quran-so-was-i/ and here (http://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/understanding-islam/5-practical-steps-understand-quran/).@5:12 Theresa says "we are going to put the link to how I came to understand Islam". She meant to say, "how I came to understand the Quran".The New Muslim's Field Guide vocab word of the day is Juz.—A word used to describe the 30 equal divisions of the Quran. The 30 Juz have no relevance to the meaning of the Quran and anyone can start reading wherever they choose. It's just an easy way to divide the Quran into 30 parts for a month of reading or into smaller sections to memorize.

In this first episode of The New Muslim's Field Guide Podcast, Theresa and Kaighla talk about their first (awkward) experiences in Ramadan, the gas we pass, the reality of enhanced hardship and ease for reverts/converts/new Muslims in Ramadan, and the importance of being kind to yourself in this beautiful month.The New Muslim's Field Guide Vocab word of the day is Wudu–  Ablution/ritual cleansing of the hands, face, nose, mouth, forearms, head, and feet, performed to remove physical/spiritual impurities before prayer.@3:00 Kaighla talks about how she thought burping “broke her wudu“. This phrase means that because of some certain act, intentional or otherwise, a person's ritual cleanliness status is rendered invalid, in which case they need to “make wudu” again before praying. To be very clear, burping does NOT break or nullify or negate your wudu (ablution, ritual purity). Farting, however, does. But no need to re-make wudu every time you burp. @4:39 Kaighla says “maybe you are not a student. Maybe you don't have tons of extra time to go and sit in the masjid”. We do not mean to say that every student has tons of free time on their hands. Being a student is rough. Sometimes students work three jobs and take 10 classes in a semester and have kids and a marriage to keep up with, so on. It's just an example of some kinds of people who might have free time, but we know some students (like Kaighla herself) who are busier than most. @5:59 Theresa talks about trying to make it as a newly married Muslim in a post-9/11 world in April 2002. To be clear that was the month she got married, not the month Ramadan fell in that year. Ramadan that year was in Nov/Dec. 

Welcome to The New Muslim's Field Guide" Podcast! Theresa and Kaighla, your trusty guides, are back to give you insights, tips, and ideas on how you can make the most of this Ramadan as a new Muslim/convert/revert. Even if you converted years ago, there's something for everyone, and heritage Muslims are welcome, too! Tune in for the tips, stay tuned for the hilarious stories of our own Ramadan experiences.