Hacking Emotional Intelligence

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Emotional Intelligence (EQ) can be hard to get. This podcast is for you if you’re looking for: more connection and respect at work; a stellar performance review; a prestigious promotion; or stronger relationships throughout your life. Join author and host Tyler Small, founder and CEO of The 5-Star Approach, who has more than 10 years of experience as a Learning and Leadership Development guru, has coached hundreds of leaders, and has designed learning experiences for hundreds of thousands of people all over the world. He and his guests share stories, tricks, and tips about acquiring those hard to get soft skills, social skills, and leadership in the workplace and beyond. Become an EQHacker today - level up with us!

Tyler Small


    • Jul 14, 2021 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 16m AVG DURATION
    • 52 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Hacking Emotional Intelligence

    #52: Listening to the Universe - Hetty Roach

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 14, 2021 31:04


    YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THE UNIVERSE - Tyler talks with Hetty Roach about her amazing personal experiences with positive thinking, the law of attraction, and intentionally opening herself to the universe. You can connect with Hetty Roach by searching YouTube and Instagram for H.E.R. Positive Thoughts. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #51: EQ, Disruption & Growth - Whitney Johnson

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 28, 2021 45:19


    EQ AT WORK, EQ AT HOME - Don't miss this engaging conversation! Tyler swaps provocative questions and thoughtful answers with guest Whitney Johnson: author, speaker, trainer, coach, disrupter & EQ master. Whitney Johnson is the CEO of human capital consultancy Disruption Advisors, an Inc. 5000 2020 fastest-growing private company in America. One of the fifty leading business thinkers in the world (#14) as named by Thinkers50, Whitney and her team are expert at helping people grow their people to grow their organization. She was a LinkedIn Top Voice in 2020, and hosts the weekly Disrupt Yourself podcast. Little known fact: She is obsessed with K dramas. https://whitneyjohnson.com/ Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #50: What part of this could be mine?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 8, 2021 8:34


    WAS IT SOMETHING I SAID? In this episode, Tyler explores how we sometimes -- okay, usually -- share some responsibility for the conflicts that involve us. AND for solving them. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #49: Lessons From Life's Front Line - Michelle Melendez

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 6, 2021 96:15


    WISE WORDS - Tyler talks with Michelle Melendez about her life, relationships, EQ and more. So much goodness in this feature-length episode! Here are some topic timestamps: 0:01:47 - growing up in truly rural Alaska 0:10:16 - leaving home for a wider world 0:20:56 - a 6-year-old suddenly enters her life 0:24:04 - abuse, growth & forgiveness 0:33:06 - change & rolling with the punches 0:39:52 - the blended family grows 0:49:44 - culture, communication, discipline, authority 1:06:40 - emotional intelligence, listening & being real 1:18:59 - nutrition, health, Lupus + a plug for Isagenix! 1:32:15 - creating 5-Star Experiences for your body You can reach Michelle via email at: isagenix.michellemelendez@gmail.com She's on Instagram at: michelle_isaqueen2019 Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #48: Advice from an EQ Pro - Evan Pincus

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 1, 2021 29:54


    “I MADE A LOT OF MISTAKES” - Tyler talks with a former colleague and mentor, Evan Pincus, about Emotional Intelligence as a differentiator, and the journey of personal EQ development. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #47: Getting On The Same Side

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 28, 2021 12:33


    RELATIONSHIPS THAT FEEL LIKE BATTLES? Do you feel some of the people in your life are on an opposing team? Tyler extrapolates from a rewarding experience when he chose to cross the line from resisting to collaborating. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #46: My Most Stubborn Moment

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2021 9:56


    STUBBORN! We've all been there. Can you appreciate an opinion that's very different from your own? In this episode, Tyler considers the potential connection between being stubborn and not respecting the opinions of others. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #45: Perspective Taking - An Allegory

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 24, 2021 17:47


    #44: Something Ridiculous

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 23, 2021 7:38


    “THAT'S RIDICULOUS!” - Has anyone asked you to do something that seemed completely ridiculous? What did you do? Tyler has a few ideas for using such moments to build the relationship. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #43: Micro-Behaviors That Foster EQ - Andrew Webb, Part 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 23, 2021 18:08


    STORY MATCHING? INTENTIONAL METAPHORS? How can you avoid putting people in boxes? Or move past how an experience made you feel to appreciate what it did for you? Andrew Webb returns to share several “Micro-Behaviors” that can boost your emotional intelligence. Check out Andrew's excellent podcast at: https://mymicrobehaviors.com/the-pod/

    #42: History, Judgement & Behavior - Andrew Webb, Part 1

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2021 20:00


    DO YOU JUDGE OTHERS? Do you also try to understand their situation? In this episode, Andrew Webb, member of the Behavior Design Lab at Stanford University, joins Tyler to discuss history, presentism, and the Fundamental Attribution Error. Check out Andrew's excellent podcast at: https://mymicrobehaviors.com/the-pod/

    #41: It Might Have Been

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 19, 2021 8:14


    DO IT FOR YOUR FUTURE SELF - What perspective-taking activities will help you decrease future regret? Listen and find out. "Of all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these: It might have been." -John Greenleaf Whittier Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

    #40: How To Make A Podcast

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 17, 2021 14:57


    PODCASTS AS A FORM OF JOURNALING - Tyler relates how he approached making a podcast, and how it helped him increase his emotional intelligence. Interested in starting your own? He shares some tips in this episode... You can find more episodes of THIS podcast on: Spofity - bit.ly/Spotify_5-Star Apple Podcasts - bit.ly/Apple_5-Star Google Podcasts - bit.ly/Google_5-Star Simplecast (browser) - bit.ly/podcast_5-Star

    spotify google apple spofity make a podcast
    #39: Why I Created This Podcast

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 15, 2021 22:19


    5 REASONS, 5 STARS - Tyler shares why he started the “Hacking Emotional Intelligence” podcast, and why he created the 5-Star Approach.

    #38: Pain, Coaching & EQ - Adam Kreek, Part 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 14, 2021 41:29


    “IT DOESN'T HURT LESS. YOU JUST GO FASTER.” Adam Kreek is back! In this engaging episode, he and Tyler discuss pain, coaching, hard skills versus soft skills, deliberate practice, values, motivations, relationships, conflict, the workplace, leadership, and more... Learn more about Adam: https://www.kreekspeak.com/ Gallup CliftonStrengths: https://www.gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/en/home.aspx

    #37: Adam's Gold-worthy Adventures - Adam Kreek, Part 1

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 13, 2021 40:26


    STORY TIME WITH ADAM KREEK. Adam is an executive coach, speaker, consultant, and the author of The Responsibility Ethic. Before all of that, however, he was winning Olympic gold medals and rowing across the Atlantic Ocean! This episode is heavy on adventure, and sets up a conversation with Tyler about emotional intelligence in the next episode. Learn more about Adam and his book: https://www.kreekspeak.com/Watch the video, “Dateline:Capsized” on NBC: https://www.nbcnews.com/video/capsized-part-1-226589251691

    #36: The 5-Star Approach to Parenting

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 12, 2021 8:36


    In this episode, Tyler welcomes his 10-year-old daughter. They discuss his first BOOK, THE 5-STAR APPROACH TO PARENTING, which she helped write -- and which is available on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3e2qxbl

    #35: "I'm confused. Can you help me understand?..."

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 9, 2021 5:45


    EVER HEAR SOMEONE ASK: “I'm confused. Can you help me understand?...” In this episode, Tyler explains how such statements can erode trust and damage your personal brand -- and what you can say instead. Hey - Don't forget to connect with The 5-Star Approach on LinkedIn, Facebook & Instagram!

    #34: Are You a Victim?

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 8, 2021 8:26


    PLAYING THE VICTIM COSTS YOU - power, influence, reputation and more. Tyler shares how he found much greater success when he learned to stop playing the victim. Hey - Don't forget to connect with The 5-Star Approach on LinkedIn, Facebook & Instagram!

    #33: Overcompensating

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 7, 2021 7:25


    HOW NOT TO DIE when driving… or in relationships. Most people feel like they're contributing more than 50% in their relationships. How is that possible? It's not! Here's what you can do about it. Hey - Don't forget to connect with The 5-Star Approach on LinkedIn, Facebook & Instagram!

    #32: Race, Cultural Competency & EQ - Elizabeth Leiba, Part 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 6, 2021 31:33


    ELIZABETH LEIBA joins us again, as she and Tyler discuss specific ways to navigate potentially thorny situations and conversations -- how to hack emotional intelligence in racial contexts. We hope that, after listening to this episode, you'll feel safer and more comfortable engaging in conversations about race. Elizabeth has been teaching Black History and Culture for over a decade, has been quoted in the New York Times (and other prestigious publications), and has founded Black History and Culture Academy. Check out her site -- https://www.blackhistorycultureacademy.com/ -- and use the coupon code: HEI2021 for half off your first month. (That's HEI2021, as in H- for “Hacking,” E- for “Emotional,” and I for “Intelligence.”) Enjoy!

    #31: Racism In America - Elizabeth Leiba, Part 1

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 5, 2021 19:22


    We welcome special guest Elizabeth Leiba! Elizabeth has been teaching Black History and Culture for over a decade, has been quoted in the New York Times (and other prestigious publications), and founded Black History and Culture Academy. We talk about the bigger picture of racism in America, and how understanding it can boost our emotional intelligence. Check out her site -- https://www.blackhistorycultureacademy.com/ -- and use the coupon code: HEI2021 for half-off your first month. (That's HEI2021, as in H- for “Hacking,” E- for “Emotional,” and I for “Intelligence.”) Enjoy!

    #30: Bad days are NOT Permanent, Personal or Pervasive

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 1, 2021 9:22


    #29 - Building a 5-Star Relationship With Yourself

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 30, 2021 7:19


    Do you have a five-star relationship with yourself? Do you want to? From thanking yourself, to apologizing to yourself, to planning great experiences for yourself — the five-star approach can help you do it. Listen to learn how...

    #28 - Building a 5-Star Relationship With Your Higher Power

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 29, 2021 8:34


    People who believe in some kind of “higher power” tend to be happier than those who don't. How would you rate your relationship with your higher power? Can the 5-Star Approach help you make it better? Join us to find out.

    #27 - Keeping An Emotional Intelligence Journal: 6 Questions To Ask

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2021 14:35


    Writing page after page in a journal may not be a sustainable daily routine for most people. However, answering these questions just a few times can help you change the way you think. An excellent way to hack your emotional intelligence (EQ).

    #26 - That Was Too Easy

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2021 5:11


    Is someone's request too easy? Run with it!

    #25 - Meet Me Halfway

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2021 6:04


    Have you ever just wanted someone to meet you halfway? I'll tell you why you might want to hold off on making this super basic request.

    #24 - Psychological Safety

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2021 10:17


    What in the world is Psychological Safety, and why do we need it? In this episode we'll talk about cavemen, boxers, and how to help other people feel comfortable around you.

    #23 - Give And Take By Adam Grant

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2021 6:23


    Tap here to take the quiz: https://www.adamgrant.net/quizzes/give-and-take-quiz/

    #22 - Three More Hacks

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 15, 2021 4:53


    You just want more simple emotional intelligence hacks? I've given them to you in this episode. You're Welcome :)

    #21 - Dumb Things Well-Intentioned People Say

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 15, 2021 9:21


    What are some super dumb things you shouldn't say? I'll share 35 of them in this episode, and I'll recommend the book that can help you understand how to avoid hurting people's feelings, without having to walk on eggshells.

    #20 - How To Cut In Line And Leave Work Early

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 7:58


    Cutting in line and leaving work early are taboo actions you typically want to avoid. However, in this episode, I'll share how to get away with it, without upsetting anyone.

    #19 - Blind Spots

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 10:23


    Here is the link to the video I mention --> https://youtu.be/IGQmdoK_ZfY

    #18 - Self Awareness with Allen Larsen

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 28:20


    EQ Assessment --> https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/ei-quiz.htm

    #17 - How To Read People's Faces When They're Wearing A Mask

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 16:42


    A lot changed during 2020. Now that face masks are the new normal, it can be harder to know what another person is feeling. Have you ever wondered what you're missing under someone's mask? Are they smiling or frowning under there? Learn the secrets of reading facial expressions in this episode.

    #16 - What Got You Here Won't Get You There

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 11:09


    The world famous executive coach, Marshall Goldsmith, has had a huge impact on me personally, and in this episode I share his biggest nuggets (that I think about and use every day).

    #15 - Emotional Intelligence and Poopy Diapers

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 10:51


    What do poopy diapers have to do with emotional intelligence? In this episode, I'm going to share the three steps of The 5-Star Approach in the context of a poopy diaper. Enjoy!

    #14 - The 5-Star Thank You

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 8:48


    The easiest way, by far, to start building a 5-Star Relationship is by using The 5-Star Thank You. It's easy. Try it!

    #13 - How to Apologize

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 28:18


    Do you avoid apologizing? Do you have trouble apologizing? Is it scary? I'll show you how to apologize in a way that's not so scary, with real examples. You can do it!

    #12 - What Is Emotional Intelligence?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 0:01


    But wait? What IS emotional intelligence? In this episode I define what I mean when I say “emotional intelligence,” I outline the major concepts of emotional intelligence, and I share my framework of how to improve it in a very practical way.

    #11 - Data Assisted Emotional Intelligence - with Samuel Norton

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2021 25:09


    Guest Samuel Norton and I discuss several emotional intelligence hacks. SlideTech and The 5-Star Approach both work on the premise that real time quantitative feedback is a game changer when it comes to getting stuff done.

    #10 - What's In It For Me?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 8:41


    What do you have to gain from putting “The 5-Star Approach” to work in your life? Beyond making better decisions and getting more done, there are many personal benefits. I'll review many of them in this episode.

    #9 - What is the 5-Star Approach?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 8:20


    Alright. I've been going on for 8 episodes about my back story. This episode covers the basics of The 5-Star Approach. I hope you can make it worthwhile by committing yourself to utilize the method, and let me know how it goes. Email me at Tyler@5starapproach.com

    #8 - Origins: Founding A Company

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 7:13


    Have you ever started a company? I've started a few, but I've never had such a deep intentionality and sense of purpose before. For me, it's a sense of calling. Here's how it all began. Certainly it was born out of research, experience, and necessity.

    #7 - Origins: A Dark Time

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 17:10


    A job offer with an increase in responsibility and impact can be very appealing, especially if it comes with a huge pay jump. This episode takes you through some of the most difficult career moments I've endured, including some of my biggest regrets.

    #6 - Origins: Getting Promoted

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 9:37


    Figuring out how to get a promotion was tough. With some help from Marshall Goldsmith, and a lot of experimentation, I eventually nailed it. Here's how I did it.

    #5 - Origins: My First Real J.O.B.

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 12:40


    After 5 years of consulting, I was terrified to get a J.O.B. To my surprise and delight, it was actually a really positive experience (especially the people I worked with) and a huge set of building blocks for my career.

    #4 - Origins: Finding My First Gig

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 8:00


    Finding a job during a recession is tough enough. When you have no practical experience, it's even harder. Here's what I did…

    #3 - Origins: Grad School

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 8:29


    Grad school has been a positive experience overall. Yet sometimes I wondered if it was all just a waste of time, especially when I was looking for my first job afterward.

    #2 - Origins: A Mentor and a Grad Program

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2021 8:41


    Finding the right mentor and grad program was a huge luck break for me. A mentor can go a long way.

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