Podcast appearances and mentions of Adam Grant

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Adam Grant

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Latest podcast episodes about Adam Grant

Talk Talent To Me
Bank Leumi Head of TA & Learning Tatiyana Cure

Talk Talent To Me

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2022 35:04


Imposter Syndrome, Remote Hiring, and Cultivating Connections with Tatiyana Cure Today on Talk Talent to Me, we chat to the formidable Tatiyana Cure who has fearlessly earned her way into the position of Head of Talent Acquisition and Learning at Bank Leumi. In our conversation, we hear about Tatiyana's inspiring approach to learning and managing imposter syndrome, the benefits of cultivating relationships with mentors, and why you shouldn't brush over your superfans. Tatiyana shares her secrets to creating time for content creation and book writing above and beyond her demanding day-to-day work life, and talks to us about her most recent publication, Hire to Win. She shares some insights she stumbled upon in the writing process regarding making meaningful connections without the pressure of networking. Finally, Tatiyana shares her opinion on what managers can do to uplevel in the wake of the pandemic and ruminates on the challenges of remote hiring and team building. Key Points From This Episode: Tatiyana Cure's unexpected route to recruitment and how she became Head of Talent Acquisition and Learning at Bank Leumi. How Tatiyana thrives outside of her comfort zone and how she manages imposter syndrome. Tatiyana's approach to learning; how she views everything as an opportunity to learn. How she initiated the relationship with her principal mentor and what she's learned from her. The benefits of having mentors and cultivating relationships that are designed to help you excel. The importance of developing and engaging your superfans. How Tatiyana makes time for her extracurricular activities such as writing books and blogging. How she gleans her content from conversations she has in her day-to-day work life. How her mission of discovering new topics without the pressure of networking provides the opportunity for deeper, more meaningful connections. The outcomes she's observed of publishing her books and being active on LinkedIn, etc. What inspired her to write her book, Hire to Win. How the pandemic affected the hiring industry and how managers can up-level in its wake. The importance of taking the human component of hiring into consideration. The difficulty of remote-hiring and remote team bonding activities. Tatiyana shares an example from Think Again by Adam Grant to demonstrate an alternative way of teaching. Tatiyana urges listeners to go out and do something completely different.   Tweetables:   “I think that anything that you go through is meant to teach you something. There's a lesson in everything.” — @TatiyanaCure [0:09:52]   “Anything that is put in my way, I look at as an opportunity to learn.” — @TatiyanaCure [0:10:50]   “Mentors are going to give you tough feedback because they want to see you grow.” — @TatiyanaCure [0:15:18]   “You would be surprised how many people are willing to have conversations and brainstorm and share ideas when that pressure of networking is removed.” — @TatiyanaCure [0:21:26]   “I think there's an opportunity within talent strategies, onboarding, team building, training, and so forth where we say, ‘I know this is what we used to do in the past but does this still work? Can we test it in a different way?'” — @TatiyanaCure [0:32:22]   “I urge [people] to go out and do something completely different. Go out and push yourself in a different way so it just shakes up your world a little bit.” — @TatiyanaCure [0:33:56] Links Mentioned in Today's Episode:   Tatiyana Cure Tatiyana Cure on LinkedIn Tatiyana Cure on Twitter Hire to Win: Manager's Practical Guide for Attracting and Interviewing Top Talent Bank Leumi Talk Talent to Me Think Again Hired

Zen Parenting Radio
Rethinking and Unlearning- Podcast #636

Zen Parenting Radio

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2022 63:32


Todd and Cathy discuss some quotes from Adam Grant, Author of Think Again, and why rethinking our beliefs leads to a wider perspective and a more compassionate viewpoint. They also discuss why allowing our kids to have different beliefs and perspectives allows them to “individuate” or find their own sense of self.

Gynecologic Surgeons Unscrubbed
Advocating for yourself with Dr. Kelly Wright (Part 2)

Gynecologic Surgeons Unscrubbed

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2022 31:20


In the second part of this two-part episode, Dr. Cara King continues her conversation with Dr. Kelly Wright, a minimally invasive gynecologic surgeon at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles. Kelly discusses the power of social media and how to set boundaries with technology, including email and the ever expanding virtual world. She also offers pro-tips on how to capitalize on telehealth to optimize patient care.   Resources: Dr. Kelly Wright on Twitter Dr. Kelly Wright on LinkedIn 48th Annual Scientific Meeting Social Media Committee Presents: Harnessing the Power of Social Media in Gynecological Medicine Think Again by Adam Grant

Here & Now
The pandemic-fueled feeling called 'languishing'; Elvis Costello's new album

Here & Now

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2022 41:59


In a The New York Times op-ed, psychologist Adam Grant puts a name to that feeling borne out of the pandemic — showing up for life, but living without purpose and aim. Emory University sociologist Corey Keyes coined that feeling "languishing." We discuss. And, Rock & Roll Hall of Fame musician Elvis Costello talks about his new album "The Boy Named If."

Gal Pals
Worth The Hype 3

Gal Pals

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2022 102:03


2022 WORTH THE HYPE:   _______   ADDITIONAL EPISODES YOU MIGHT ALSO ENJOY:   Worth The Hype 1   Worth The Hype 2   Receiving Feedback   Giving Feedback   Nuances of Friendships, Not Taking It Personally, & Overthinking    _______ CONNECT WITH US Instagram Join: Gal Pal Corral   ENGRID Instagram: @livengproof Email: engrid@livengproof.com  Liveng Proof Podcast Website   GEORGIE Instagram: @georgiemorley The Chasing Joy Podcast Website   _____   TV SHOW or MOVIE    Georgie: Soul - pixar   Engrid: Outlander Ted Lasso Maid Gilmore Girls Queer Eye Flea Bag Yellowstone Normal People Harry Potter I'ts a Wonderful Life Dune   Listeners:  Schitt's Creek Queer Eye Friends Ted Lasso Arcane Encanto The Office (how am I just watching this now) Gilmore Girls Brooklyn 99 Hacks Handmaid's Tale All I know Witcher and Wheel of Time Only Murders in the Building Euphoria Emily in Paris Seinfeld Yellowstone Succession Street Gang - a documentary about Sesame Street Insecure You Euphoria Sex Life of College Girls Sex Education Dune Squid Game Grey's Anatomy Outerbanks The Crown Maid Gossip Girl Reboot Spiderman no way home Fleabag   _____   MUSICAL ARTIST / NEW SONG   Georgie: Doja Cat Dua Lipa Lil Nas X   Engrid: Taylor Swift Tyler Childers Where's My Love - SYML Heat Wave - Glass Animals   Listeners: Taylor Swift All to Well 10 minute version Nic D.  Serotonin and Fineapple two great songs Tame Impala Fleet Foxes Adele Harry Styles Justin Beiber Olivia Rodrigo Maggie Rogers Brandi Carlile Lorde's Mood Ring Lizzy McAlpine Silk Sonic   _____   FASHION TREND / BRAND   Georgie: Straight Leg/Boyfriend Jeans Birkenstocks Blundstones Bucket Hats   Engrid: Doc. Marten Chelsea Combat Boot Abercrombie Curve Love Straight Jeans Cross Body Fanny Packs (JAck)   Listeners:  Poshmark Free People Everlane Mom Jeans Skinny Jeans High waisted pants Blundstone's Thrifting Levis Jeans Ankle booties Lululemon TNA sweat sets (Aritzia) Champion Sweats High top converse High waisted everything Rothy's Straight leg jeans Sheertex tights Girlfriend Collective Mom Jeans Bucket Hats Patagonia North Face Claw clips Overalls Hill house nap dress Skims Dr. Martens   _____   BEAUTY TRENDS   Georgie: Farmacy Honeymoon Glow The ilia mascara Beauty blenders Facials Charlotte Tilbury   Engrid: Charlotte Tilbury Contour Wand Niacinamide  Farmacy - Honey Grail Ultra Hydrating Face Oil OSEA Body Oil Olaplex Bumble & Bumble Flexible Hold Hairspray   Listeners: La Mer Olaplex Mara Algea Retinol Face Oil Ilia Sunscreen JVN air dry cream Origins Clinique concealer The brow trio The no makeup work from home life Summer fridays Super soft washcloths for makeup removal Microblading Glossier Paula's choice Creave Boy brow Faux freckles + blush Primally pure Ice rollingt Biossance Beauty counter Laneige Face steamers Glitter eyeshadow Oil cleansing Certain glossier items Mini uggs Gel x nails Mascara primer Charlotte tilbury flawless filter   _____   OTHER BRAND   Georgie: Mejuri Baggu bags - nellie got them for me Cuyana leather bags - my friend Lindsay introduced me to them Nice cars   Engrid: Lululemon Align Leggings Bala Wrist/Ankle Weights Bomba Socks Loopy Phone Cases Manduka Yoga Blocks & Mat Weighted Blankets   Listeners: Lumie alarm clock WeVibe vibrator Silk pillow cases Cometeer coffee June shine Retin A for acne  Revlon blow dry brush Peloton Bala bangles Stanley water bottles Brooklinen pillows Ritual vitamins Nice sheets Air fryer Dyson vacuum Tushy bidet Simple modern cup   _____ BOOK OR PODCAST Georgie: What We Said Be there in 5 The Daily   Engrid: Breath - by James Nestor Atlas of the Heart - Brene Brown Drama of the Gifted Child The Boy, The Mole, The Fox, & The Horse - Charlie Mackesy Be There in Five (podcast) Unlocking Us (podcast) Adult Child (podcast) Absolutely Not (podcast) Listeners: To Kill a Mockingbird The Alchemist Jenna Kutcher's podcast Braiding sweetgrass - (book) Where should we begin - ester perell Atomic habits (book) Daisy Jones (book) The Six (book) We Can Do Hard Things podcast Brene Brown NPR's throughline Midnight Library (book) Nature of Fragile Things (book) True Crime Garage Podcast Bad Broadcast It Ends with Us (book) The Seven Husbands of Eveelyn Hugo (book) Crime Junkies Murdaugh Murders Podcsat Girls Gotta Eat Four Winds (book) Last thing he ever told me (book) Rock Paper Scissors (book) Armchair Expert Podcast The River has Teeth (book) Think Again by Adam Grant (book)   _____ NOT WORTH THE HYPE   Georgie: Aritzia Agolde jeans - they aren't bad - they're just really expensive for what they are nespresso   Engrid: Outer Banks Squid Game Ritual Vitamins (IMO) Dyson Vacuum Cleaner   Listeners: Cros Netflix Justin Bieber Dyson Airwrap Always Pan The Bachelor Shackets Adele Friends Skims Emily in Paris Don't Look Up Dryer Brush - Revlon     Patrick TA lamination gel makes brows crusty af Tula Glossier Drunk elephant Brazilian waxes Alcohol Taylor swift Juicers Boy brow (there I said it) Zara Madaket Millie's   _____   INFLUENCER RECOMMENDED PRODUCT   Georgie: Nuuly - my friend Mimi influenced me and used a what we said code Credo beauty *the healthy maven w&p Porter mug - instagram ad Mimi & jaci   Engrid: Bliss Skincare Products  Sports Research Collagen Peptides Coastal Blue Blocking Glasses Ole Henriksen Truth On The Glow - Cleansing Cloths (not worth it IMO) Ritual Vitamins    Listeners: Ilia mascara AYBL activewear Woo Lube Curology Fab Fit Fun Box Dashing Diva Gloss Nail Strips Vegamour for hair growth - didn't like Dae Monsoon Moisture Mask Jaclyn Hill makeup The brow trio Laura Mercier Setting powder That giant water bottle *not worth the hype Summer Fridays - the jet lag mask Ana Louisa jewelry Matcha tea - not worth the hype Sheertex Ritual Spanx leggings Glossier Always pan - returned after 2 months no longer non-stick Ice roller Parade underwear Outdoor voices exercise dress Sharpie gel pens for bullet journaling Waterless shampoo/conditioner Hydrojug Athletic greens Ilia serum Chemex Cuup bras Thrive lash extension mascara

Raising Good Humans
S2 Ep 37: Think Again Parenting: Adam Grant Translating His Leadership Tools Into Parenting Tools

Raising Good Humans

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2022 51:29


Ted-Talker NYTimes bestselling author, and Professor Adam Grant Translating Leadership Tools Into Parenting Tools.   www.Talkspace.com with code "humans" for $100 off your first month. www.Blueland.com/HUMANS for 20% off your first order. www.Helloned.com/HUMANS for 15% off your order.   Show Notes:  Bulletin: draliza.bulletin.com https://urldefense.com/v3/__https://tedtalks/social/WLAdam__;!!IBzWLUs!BV5eQg51AnGWYf8iSxaAIZRfPfwhN4BROJ9LfQJ6HZVv-b9Ac1MSnXwgZXpWIScgzv3DXw$   Produced by Dear Media

Meditation Minis Podcast
"The Happiness Lab" - Special Preview!

Meditation Minis Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2022 8:31


This week, I'm sharing a special preview of the new season of The Happiness Lab. On The Happiness Lab, Dr. Laurie Santos shares evidence-based research that will challenge what you think it means to live a happy life. You'll hear inspiring and surprising stories that will make you think differently about your own happiness. This season, she's helping listeners navigate something most of us avoid: bad feelings. Many of us assume that we can only be happy if we push aside  emotions like stress, sadness, and anger. But what if instead of suppressing our nastiest emotions, we could find power in them to improve our well-being? J Joining her are leading experts like Brené Brown and Adam Grant who share practical tips to put guilt, anxiety, and burnout to good use in 2022. In this preview, she talks to Harvard Medical School psychologist Susan David about why we choose to ignore negative feelings, and the definition of emotional agility. You can listen to more episodes of The Happiness Lab at: https://link.chtbl.com/mediationminishappiness Enjoy this special preview of the Happiness Lab!

Mindfulness Manufacturing
56 Building Bridges and Leading From Behind

Mindfulness Manufacturing

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2022 24:23


What happens when you put others first, work hard, and become a bridge builder?   A legacy is formed, and we are privleged to go deep with LaVerne Roberts as she reveals what it took to become a Director of Operations in a traditional male dominated role.  Paving the way to a better future for manufacturing, LaVerne lights up a room and listening to her wisdom leaves you wanting more.  Her authentic, caring, fun, attitude backed with decades of success made her a must guest on the podcast.   Enjoy this episode and let us know what you think!   1:45 – 45 years, research, and development success to director of operations, why??   3:20 – building a network, not even realizing I was doing it, relationships   5:05 – any doubts came from within, Vice President support and getting surrounded by great people   7:00 – you must work hard, learning the fundamentals not so much the leadership skill, like going to school   8:05 – not asking for help, self imposter syndrome(for more science on this, check out Adam Grant's book Think Again)   10:00 – self-doubt more common, men verses woman may be different   12:00 – one on one coaching, identified my leadership style flexes from leading from behind and leading at the front   13:00 –leading from behind suggesting to the team, supporting them   13:55 – in the beginning, you may need to lead from the front, create the vision, help the team see what we wanted to look like   15:30 – Jim Collins, Good to Great, I or we, how LaVerne allows the team to take direction   16:30 – do more with the kernel, how it is received, will determine the next steps   17:54 – husband Scott says LaVerne is a bridge builder, not for LaVerne, for the excitement of what is going to happen when the connection is made   19:10 – when people can see you are not in it for yourself, people ask more questions about you   20:20 – finding the sweet spot-on building trust, finding the common ground, something we connect with   21:55 – you also must be a good listener, you can with enough ambition and desire achieve great things, and chart your journey, we are a lot stronger and smarter than we think

Destined To Be
What We Learned About Success & Slowing Down in 2021 - EP179

Destined To Be

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 11, 2022 42:49


2021 was a transformative year for us. Jeremiah's spiritual awakening in June had a ripple effect, shifting the way we think about think success and forcing us to prioritize what matters most.  We had the most rewarding year of our lives financially and deepened our relationship as a couple. And yes, we did fun things like buy Jeremiah's dream car and install a pool in our backyard. But we also realized that having things doesn't matter much if you're carrying trauma in your body, trying to outrun your pain. If you're measuring yourself against an ideal and never taking the time to BE. On this episode of Destined to Be, we reflect on what we've accomplished in the last 12 months, personally and professionally, explaining why we focused on energy, alignment and slowing down in 2021. We share what we learned about not taking things personally, making decisions from a place of faith and holding space for ourselves, each other and our children. Listen in to understand why we're focused on ‘living in the game' in 2022 and learn how to be happier NOW by measuring your success through the gain, not the gap!  Key Takeaways   Why we focused on energy, alignment and slowing down in 2021 Our biggest personal and professional accomplishments in the last 12 months How Jeremiah's team rallied around him through his spiritual awakening Why you can have everything you want and still be unhappy How we think about not taking it personally when people resist our growth How Jeremiah's beliefs around rest and success changed in 2021 What inspired Jeremiah's focus on ‘living in the game' in 2022 How trauma impacts our bodies and brains—and what to do about it What it looks like to hold space for yourself and other people  Why it's crucial to have a relationship with your numbers (especially in business) What Mallory learned in 2021 about working with her feminine energy  Dan Sullivan's theory of measuring success by the gain vs. the gap Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory Destined to Be Podcast Destined to Be on Instagram Jeremiah on Instagram Mallory on Instagram Level Up Entourage Facebook Group Text VIP to 586-600-8492 Resources Register for Men's Level Up VIP  Dean Graziosi  Adam Grant on Introversion  Jim Fortin's Free Trainings Arete Syndicate The 12 Steps The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk, MD Kyle Depiesse on Destined to Be EP175 Jake Woodard on Masculine and Feminine Energy Entrepreneurial Operating System Traction: Get a Grip on Your Business by Gino Wickman The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz Strategic Coach Who Not How: The Formula to Achieve Bigger Goals Through Accelerating Teamwork by Dan Sullivan with Dr. Benjamin Hardy Dan Sullivan on Gap vs. Gain

A Slight Change of Plans with Maya Shankar
Listening to Negative Emotions with The Happiness Lab

A Slight Change of Plans with Maya Shankar

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 10, 2022 5:06


Sharing something special this week while we're working on new episodes. It's a preview of the new season of The Happiness Lab, hosted by Maya's friend Dr. Laurie Santos. On The Happiness Lab, Laurie shares evidence-based research that will challenge your understanding of means to live a happy life. Based on the popular psychology course she teaches at Yale, you'll hear inspiring, surprising stories that will make you think differently about your own happiness. This season, she's helping us navigate something we tend to avoid: bad feelings. Laurie asks: What if negative feelings are telling us something important?  Laurie's joined by leading experts like Brené Brown, Adam Grant, and Susan David, who share practical tips to put guilt, anxiety, and burnout to good use in 2022. You can listen to more episodes of The Happiness Lab at https://link.chtbl.com/slightchangehappinesslab Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

How'd It Happen Podcast
Chapters 19 & 26 - The Four Fallacies & Getting Selfish (#234)

How'd It Happen Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 7, 2022 38:10


I am diving deeper into my book “OWNER SHIFT – How Getting Selfish Got Me Unstuck" and invited a very good friend to join me in today's unique episode. John Corcoran and I talked about two chapters of the book: Chapters 19 and 26, The Four Fallacies & Getting Selfish, respectively. You'll hear my perspective on why I wanted to write these chapters and what John thinks of them. Here's a little something about my guest for this unique episode: John Corcoran is a recovering attorney and a writer, author, father of four, and a former Clinton White House Writer and Speechwriter to the Governor of California. Throughout his career, John has worked in Hollywood, the heart of Silicon Valley, and ran his own boutique law firm in the San Francisco Bay Area catering to small business owners and entrepreneurs.He is the author of three books about relationship building and client acquisition and has written for Forbes, Entrepreneur, Business Insider, Lifehacker, The San Francisco Chronicle, and basically anywhere else that will let him. He has been the host of the Smart Business Revolution podcast since 2012, through which he has interviewed hundreds of CEOs, founders, authors and entrepreneurs, from Peter Diamandis and Adam Grant to Gary Vaynerchuk and Marie Forleo.Web: https://rise25.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/corcoran/Show notes:[0:53] Introducing our special guest, John Corcoran[4:15] Mike's "broke" stage[6:32] Digging further into "in that place because it was where I designed myself to be"[11:00] The switch in mindset is essential[16:40] What EVERY entrepreneur should start thinking[20:28] Painting a different picture for the future[25:37] What John felt after reading Chapter 26 and what I really wanted to convey in this chapter[35:39] The implications if you're not pouring from a "filled" cup[37:30] OutroCheck the accompanying blog post of this episode at: https://mikemalatesta.com/podcast/chapters-19-26-the-four-fallacies-getting-selfish-234/If you like this episode and want to be the first to know when new ones are released? Make sure you subscribe! Also, a review will be much appreciated, so make sure you give us a 5-star (or whatever one makes the most sense to you).Connect with Mike:Website: https://mikemalatesta.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mikemalatesta/

The Next Big Idea
HACK YOUR HABITS: The Science of Making Changes That Stick

The Next Big Idea

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 6, 2022 69:45


Why is it so hard to break bad habits and replace them with good ones? You may think it all comes down to willpower. But social psychologist Wendy Wood says that if you really want to change your life, you need to tap into your unconscious mind. She would know. Wendy is the world's foremost expert on habits and the author of “Good Habits, Bad Habits: The Science of Making Positive Changes That Stick.” Today, she chats with Next Big Idea Club curator Adam Grant about harnessing the science of habit formation to improve your life for the better. This conversation was among the first that we aired on this podcast, and we left a lot of great moments on the cutting room floor. Today, we're restoring them. What follows is an extended version of Wendy and Adam's conversation with new insights about overcoming chronic lateness, developing sustainable exercise routines, and making New Year's resolutions that last past February.NEXT BIG IDEA CLUB:Looking for a good habit to develop? Try downloading the Next Big Idea app and listening to a new Book Bite every day: http://nextbigideaclub.com/appSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Mission to the Moon
MM EP.1374 | เรียนรู้วิธีจัดการกับความเศร้าจากหนังสือ ‘Option B'

Mission to the Moon

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 5, 2022 13:56


‘Option B' หนังสือที่แต่งโดย Sheryl Sandberg และ Adam Grant ที่ไม่ได้มาพูดถึงเรื่องธุรกิจ แต่จะเล่าถึงเหตุการณ์โศกนาฏกรรมครั้งใหญ่ ที่เธอสูญเสียสามีอันเป็นที่รักอย่างไม่มีวันหวนกลับ พร้อมวิธีจัดการความเศร้าและการฟื้นฟูสภาพจิตใจ . สำหรับใครที่กำลังเผชิญกับความโศกเศร้า หรือ กำลังต้องการช่วยใครสักคนขึ้นมาจากความเศร้า ลองมาค้นหาคำตอบไปพร้อมกันกับหนังสือเล่มนี้ และอาจทำให้เราค้นพบว่า การยอมรับ Option B แทนที่ Option A ก็ไม่ได้แย่เสมอไป . #missiontothemoon #missiontothemoonpodcast #inspiration

Mission to the Moon Podcast
MM EP.1374 | เรียนรู้วิธีจัดการกับความเศร้าจากหนังสือ ‘Option B'

Mission to the Moon Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 5, 2022 13:56


‘Option B' หนังสือที่แต่งโดย Sheryl Sandberg และ Adam Grant ที่ไม่ได้มาพูดถึงเรื่องธุรกิจ แต่จะเล่าถึงเหตุการณ์โศกนาฏกรรมครั้งใหญ่ ที่เธอสูญเสียสามีอันเป็นที่รักอย่างไม่มีวันหวนกลับ พร้อมวิธีจัดการความเศร้าและการฟื้นฟูสภาพจิตใจ . สำหรับใครที่กำลังเผชิญกับความโศกเศร้า หรือ กำลังต้องการช่วยใครสักคนขึ้นมาจากความเศร้า ลองมาค้นหาคำตอบไปพร้อมกันกับหนังสือเล่มนี้ และอาจทำให้เราค้นพบว่า การยอมรับ Option B แทนที่ Option A ก็ไม่ได้แย่เสมอไป . #missiontothemoon #missiontothemoonpodcast #inspiration

The Productive Designer
#0057 The Success Factor, with Dr. Ruth Gotian

The Productive Designer

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 5, 2022 26:39


Featured in this week's episode of The Productive Designer, host Crystal Collinson interviews former Assistant Dean for Mentoring & Executive Director of the Mentoring Academy at Weill Cornell Medicine, Dr. Ruth Gotian.She has been hailed by the journal Nature and Columbia University as an expert in mentoring and leadership development. She is currently a contributor to Forbes and Psychology Today where she writes about ‘optimizing success'. In 2021, she was one of 30 people worldwide named to the Thinkers50 Radar List, dubbed the Oscars of management thinking. Also, she's a semi-finalist for the Forbes 50 Over 50 list.Ruth's  research is about the mindset and skill set of peak performers, including Nobel laureates, astronauts and Olympic champions. Her book, The Success Factor, shares the stories of extreme high achievers and unlocks the path to success.Crystal and Dr. Ruth discuss the success factor - traits & characteristics of high achievers and the four elements of success. Ruth believes that everybody wants to be successful they just don't know how. She believes that success consists of a skill set that can be taught. Also, discovered that what works for one person may not work for another. And an individual approach is needed. Ruth explains that these are not habits but a mindset shift.So join Crystal and Dr. Ruth as they talk about the success factor and her insights about mentorship. “Do something today that your future self will thank you for”. And order Dr. Ruth's book now, available January 2022.If you enjoyed the episode, show your support by buying me a coffee buymeacoffee.com/TPDpodcastHow to reach Dr. Ruth:Website: ruthgotian.com I Podcast: The Mentor Project I LinkedIn: rgotianRecommended podcast/book:Adam Grant, The Women's NetworkA Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Stockholm book by Robert LefkowitzThe Long Game book by Dorie ClarkResources mentioned:  The Success Factor bookPassion AuditMentoring Team

Being Indispensable
147. Being a (Successful) Giver in 2022

Being Indispensable

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 5, 2022 13:51


A solo episode kicking off 2022 with a book recommendation.  - What defines a 'giver', a 'taker' and a 'matcher' - Why this applies particularly to Executive Assistants - How I relate to being a failing giver and the cost it takes on me - How it applies to my word of 2022 - My wish for you, my lovely listener Watch the TEDx talk where Adam Grant talks about these concepts here:  https://www.ted.com/talks/adam_grant_are_you_a_giver_or_a_taker?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare Read more about the book here: https://www.adamgrant.net/book/give-and-take/

10 Million Journey
#210: 2021 Christmas Panel - Eric Lott, John Guenther, Vanessa Hung and John Cavendish

10 Million Journey

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 30, 2021 69:36


Today, we have a traditional 10 MJ Christmas Roundtable with some familiar faces and some new ones. We have my good friend and founder of Product Launcher John Guenther, Eric Lott, who is an amazon seller mostly doing wholesale, he shared an incredible story moving from teacher to 7-figure amazon seller, that you can find on the podcast, Vanessa Hung top expert for Amazon's unsexy tasks such as dealing with flat files, getting accounts unsuspended, etc and John Cavendish is the CEO of Seller Candy, which is the Expert Amazon Operations arm of an Amazon business. Today, we are going to talk about 2021, what happened with our business, with our lives, and with Amazon. Link from the episode:  Vanessa Farnam Street - https://fs.blog/   Books recommended:   John Guenther   “Principles For Dealing With The Changing World Order: Why Nations Succeed And Fail” by Ray Dalio - https://www.amazon.com/Principles-For-Dealing-With-The-Changing-World-Order?tag=10mj-20 “The 1% Rule: How To Fall In Love With The Process And Achieve Your Wildest Dreams” by Tommy Baker - https://www.amazon.com/The-1%-Rule?tag=10mj-20 Eric Lott “Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself: How To Lose Your Mind And Create A New One” by Joe Dispenza - https://www.amazon.com/Breaking-The-Habit-Of-Being-Yourself?tag=10mj-20 “The Storyteller: Tales Of Life And Music” by Dave Grohl - https://www.amazon.com/The-Storyteller?tag=10mj-20 Vanessa Hung “The Almanack of Naval Ravikant: A Guide To Wealth And Happiness” by Eric Jorgenson - https://www.amazon.com/Almanack-Of-Naval-Ravikant?tag=10mj-20 “Traction: Get A Grip On Your Business” by Gino Wickman - https://www.amazon.com/Traction-Get-A-Grip-On-Your-Business?tag=10mj-20 “Think Again: The Power Of Knowing What You Don't Know” by Adam Grant - https://www.amazon.com/Think-Again-The-Power-Knowing-What-You-Don't-Know?tag=10mj-20 John Cavendish “The Surrender Experiment: My Journey Into Life's Perfection” by Michael Singer - https://www.amazon.com/The-Surrender-Experiment?tag=10mj-20 “Autobiography Of A Yogi (Self-Realization Fellowship) by Paramahansa Yogananda - https://www.amazon.com/Autobiography-Of-A-Yogi?tag=10mj-20 “The Fourth Turning: An American Prophecy” by William Strauss - https://www.amazon.com/The-Fourth-Turning-An-American-Prophecy?tag=10mj-20 Anatoly “Eat A Peach: A Memoir” by David Chang - https://www.amazon.com/Eat-A-Peach-A-Memoir?tag=10mj-20 “The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself” by Michael Singer - https://www.amazon.com/The-Untethered-Soul?tag=10mj-20 “Start With Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone To Take Action” by Simon Sinek - https://www.amazon.com/Start-With-Why?tag=10mj-20   Connect with guests: John G. LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/john-guenther Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jguenth555/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/john.guenther Company Website: Product Launcher - https://www.getproductlauncher.com/   Eric   Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/theresellingteacher/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/theresellingteacher/ Vanessa LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/vanessaamazonproblemsolver/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/fulltimeamazon Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/fulltime.amazon/ Blogs - https://fulltimeamazon.medium.com/ Company Website and Social Media: Online Seller Solutions - https://www.onlinesellersolutions.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/onlinesellersolutions/ John C. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thejohncavendish/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jgcuk Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thejohncavendish/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/johngcavendish Company Website and Social Media: Seller Candy - https://sellercandy.com/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/sellercandy/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SellerCandyPro Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sellercandyamz/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/videos   Want to sit down with Anatoly 1 on 1 ? Even though I keep saying I AM NOT A GURU, many of you ask to sit down and pick my brain. I have decided to do a 1h HELP calls. There are 2 purposes: 1st to support you in your journey and second also to be able to break even on the production of this podcast (each episode editing, marketing, guest research etc takes about $60 - $150 to produce). Now you can schedule 1h with me, and we can talk about launching products, hiring, product research, keywords, mindset, how I did an Ironman or anything at all. Link is here - https://calendly.com/anatolyspektor/anatoly-connsulting-1h    ANATOLY's TOOLS:   Product Development: Helim10 - I use it for  Product Research, Keyword tracking and Listing Optimization .  SPECIAL DEAL: Get 50% your first month or 10% every month: http://bit.ly/CORNERSIIH10  Pickfu - I use it for split testing all of my products and for validation ideas .  SPECIAL DEAL: First split test 50% 0ff  https://www.pickfu.com/10mj   Trademarking: Trademark Angels - For all my trademarking needs.  SPECIAL: Mention Anatoly and 10MJ podcast and get 10% Off your trademark.   HR: Fiverr -  I hire my 3dMockup person and images label designer here on Fiverr - http://bit.ly/10mjFIVERR Upwork - I hire people long term on Upwork - upwork.com  Loom.com - for creating SOP's, I record everything on Loom and give to my VA's Keepa.com - to track historical data such as prices   ANATOLY's  3 Favorite  Business Books: DotCom Secrets by Russel Brunson - I think this is a must read for every online entrepreneurs - http://bit.ly/10MJDotCom 4 hours work week by Tim Ferriss  - This book changed my life and made my become an entrepreneur - http://bit.ly/10MJ4WW The Greatest Salesman In The World  by Og Mandino - Old book but it goes to the core of selling -  http://bit.ly/10MJGREATSM    DISCLAIMER: Some Links are affiliate, it costs you nothing, but helps to keep this podcast on the float   Have questions? Go to https://www.10millionjourney.com Follow us on Instagram: @10millionjourney

Podcast Notes Playlist: Latest Episodes
#127 Best of 2021: Conversations of the Year

Podcast Notes Playlist: Latest Episodes

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 30, 2021 108:31


Knowledge Project Podcast Notes Key Takeaways “Check out The Knowledge Project Episode Page & Show Notes“Read the full notes @ podcastnotes.orgThe Knowledge Project closes 2021 with a look back at some of the best conversations of the year. Featuring interviews from 10 of the most downloaded and acclaimed episodes of 2021, this collection of conversations offers a variety of insights into how to make crucial decisions, how to spark creativity, the best ways to avoid distraction, how to deal with loneliness, what traits to look for in a leader, the value of re-thinking your position, the importance of personal relationships, and much more.   Guests on this episode include: business leader Kat Cole, NBA basketball player Chris Bosh, loneliness expert Noreena Hertz, organizational psychologist Adam Grant, NASA astrophysicist Thomas Zurbuchen, video game expert Jane McGonigal, author Nir Eyal, author and entrepreneur Seth Godin, psychologist Angela Duckworth, and business expert Jim Collins.   -- Want even more? Members get early access, hand-edited transcripts, member-only episodes, and so much more. Learn more here: https://fs.blog/membership/ Every Sunday our Brain Food newsletter shares timeless insights and ideas that you can use at work and home. Add it to your inbox: https://fs.blog/newsletter/ Follow Shane on Twitter at: https://twitter.com/ShaneAParrish

Spa it Girl Talk Show by Yvette Le Blowitz
EP.156 - Chatter with Ethan Kross, Author and Acclaimed Psychologist 

Spa it Girl Talk Show by Yvette Le Blowitz

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2021 31:20


Welcome to the #SPAITGIRL Talk Show with Yvette Le Blowitz EP.156 - Chatter with Ethan Kross, Author and Acclaimed Psychologist  The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters and How to Harness It Ethan Kross is one of the World's Leading Experts on Controlling the Conscious Mind. An award-winning professor in the University of Michigan's top ranked Psychology Department and its Ross School of Business, he is the director of the Emotion & Self Control Laboratory. Ethan has participated in policy discussion at the White House and has been interviewed about his research on CBS Evening News, Good Morning America, Anderson Cooper Full Circle, and NPR's Morning Edition. His pioneering research has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The New Yorker, Harvard Business Review, USA Today, The Economist, The Atlantic, Forbes, Time, The New England Journal of Medicine, and Science. Ethan was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York. He attended the University of Pennsylvania. After earning his PhD in Psychology from Columbia University, Ethan completed a post-doctoral fellowship in social-affective neuroscience to learn about the neural systems that support self-control. He moved to the University of Michigan in 2008, where he founded the Emotion & Self Control Laboratory. Emotions & Self Control Lab explore how people can control their emotions to improve their understanding of how self-control works and to discover ways of enhancing self-control in daily life. They have adopted an integrative approach to address these issues that draws on multiple disciplines within psychology including social, personality, clinical developmental, and neuroscience.   They integrate across these areas in terms of the types of questions they ask, the methods they use to address them, and the populations that they focus on. Ethan is the author of the National Bestseller Chatter The Voice in Our Head, Why it Matters and How to Harness it, which was chosen as one of the best new books of the year by the Washington Post, CNN and USA Today and the Winning Winter 2021 selection for Malcolm Gladwell, Adam Grant, Susan Cain and Dan Pink's Next Big Idea Book Club. Chatter is scheduled to be translated into over 35 languages.  Ethan lives in Ann Arbor with his wife and two daughters. In Chatter, acclaimed psychologist Ethan Kross explores the silent conversations we have with ourselves.   Interweaving groundbreaking behavioural and brain research from his own lab with real-world case studies, from a pitcher who forgets how to pitch, to a Harvard undergrad negotiating her double life as a spy. Ethan Kross explains how these conversations shape our lives, work and relationships. He warns that giving in to negative and disorienting self-talk what he calls "chatter" can tank our health, sink our moods, strain our social connections, and cause us to fold under pressure. But the good news is that we're already equipped with the tools we need to make our inner voice work in our favour. Chatter by Ethan Kross gives us the power change the most important conversation we have each day the one we have with ourselves Yvette Le Blowitz Podcast Host sits down with Ethan Kross to find out what Chatter is, why it matters and how we can harness it. In Podcast Episode 156 Ethan Kross shares: - a little bit about himself - the meaning behind his book title Chatter - insights into his National Bestselling book Chatter - cutting-edge science with real life examples to how our inner conversations shape our work and relationships - what Chatter is and how to harness it - tools to harness your own voice so that you can be happier, healthier and more productive. - how to turn your inner voice from critic to coach - how to re-direct our inner voices away from rumination, negative self talk and self-criticism - some of his self-care rituals Plus so much more  Get Ready to TUNE IN  ----- Episode 156 - #spaitgirl talk show with Yvette Le Blowitz  available on Apple, Spotify, Google, Audible, Libysn - all podcast apps search for #spaitgirl on any podcast app or on google  -------- Available to watch on Youtube Channel - Spa it Girl or Yvette Le Blowitz Press the Play Button Below and subscribe ------ JOIN OUR #SPAITGIRL BOOK CLUB Buy a copy of Chatter by Ethan Kross   search via Booktopia our affiliated online book store  *click here Hashtag #spaitgirlbookclub //#spaitgirl + tag @spaitgirl - when reading your book  --- STAY IN TOUCH   Podcast Guest Ethan Kross Acclaimed Psychologist  Author of Chatter Website: www.ethankross.com Instagram @ethankross ------ Podcast Host  Yvette Le Blowitz  Instagram @yvetteleblowitz Website www.yvetteleblowitz.com Youtube Channel: Yvette Le Blowitz  ------- Become a Podcast Show Sponsor #SPAITGIRL  www.spaitgirl.com Email: info@spaitgirl.com with your proposal -- JOIN OUR #SPAITGIRL Community  Follow on Instagram: @spaitgirl Sign Up to our Mailing List: www.spaitgirl.com Search for #spaitgirl on any podcast app, youtube and subscribe  ------- HOW TO SUPPORT The #SPAITGIRL Podcast Show  Practice a Little Random Act of Kindness  - subscribe to the #spaitgirl podcast show on any podcast app  - leave a 5* rating and review  - tell someone about the #spaitgirl podcast show - share your favourite episode - tag @spaitgirl in your stories - hashtag #spaitgirl to share the show &  Together "Let's Feel Good From Within" and #makefeelinggoodgoviral ---- Please note - Affiliated Links included in this spaitgirl.com blog post includes affiliated links with Amazon.com and booktopia.com.au- should you order any books from Amazon.com or Booktopia.com.au via the links contained in this blog post spaitgirl.com will receive a small paid commission fee from the online book stores.  Please note - The information in this podcast is a general conversation between the podcast host and podcast guest and is not intended to replace professional medical advice and should not be considered a substitute for medical treatment or advice from a mental health professional.  Use of any of the material in this podcast show is always at the listeners discretion.   The podcast host and guest accept no liability arising directly or indirectly from use or misuse of any of the information contained in this podcast show and podcast episode conversation, or any trauma triggered or associated with it. If you are experiencing depression, mental illness, any health concerns please seek medical professional help immediately. 

Audiobook Reviews in Five Minutes
Top 2021 Reviews: Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman

Audiobook Reviews in Five Minutes

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2021 7:00


My favourite audiobook of 2021! Oliver Burkeman is the author of The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking (2012) and Help! How to Become Slightly Happier and Get a Bit More Done (2011), a collection of columns for the Guardian newspaper. Four Thousand Weeks is about making the most of our radically finite lives in a world of impossible demands, relentless distraction and political insanity (and 'productivity techniques' that mainly just make everyone feel busier). “This is the most important book ever written about time management. Oliver Burkeman offers a searing indictment of productivity hacking and profound insights on how to make the best use of our scarcest, most precious resource. His writing will challenge you to rethink many of your beliefs about getting things done—and you'll be wiser because of it” —ADAM GRANT, author of Think Again and host of WorkLife Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/55717229-four-thousand-weeks Connect with Audiobook Reviews in 5: · Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/audiobook_reviews_podcast/ · Twitter: @janna_ca · Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AudiobookReviewsInFiveMinutes · Anchor: https://anchor.fm/audiobookreviews · Audiobook Reviews in Five Minutes website: https://podcast.jannastam.com/ · Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/jannastam Audio production by Graham Stephenson Episode music: Caprese by Blue Dot Sessions Rate, review, and subscribe to this podcast on Apple, Anchor, Breaker, Google, Overcast, Pocket Casts, RadioPublic, and Spotify This episode was previously published in August 2021

The Seen and the Unseen - hosted by Amit Varma
Ep 257: Objects Speak to Annapurna Garimella

The Seen and the Unseen - hosted by Amit Varma

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 27, 2021 200:02


The world is what it is -- but no one knows what that is, and we all see different worlds. Designer and art historian Annapurna Garimella joins Amit Varma in episode 257 of The Seen and the Unseen to describe her passage of seeing, remembering, reflecting. Also check out:1. Annapurna Garimella on Amazon. 2. Sara Rai Inhales Literature -- Episode 255 of The Seen and the Unseen. 3. Memories and Things -- Episode 195 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Aanchal Malhotra). 4. Lord of the Flies -- William Golding. 5. Human Behavioral Biology -- 25 Lectures by Robert Sapolsky. 6. On Children -- Kahlil Gibran. 7. The Better Angels of Our Nature -- Steven Pinker. 8. Mamta -- Directed by Asit Sen. 9. 'Rahen Na Rahen Hum' -- Song from Mamta. 10. 'Rahte The Kabhi Jinke' -- Song from Mamta. 11. 'Chupa Lo Yun Dil Mein Pyar Mera' -- Song from Mamta. 12. 'Kuchh Tho Log Kahenge' -- Song from Amar Prem. 13. Clara Barton, Margaret Mead and Florence Nightingale on Wikipedia. 14. The Complete Works of William Shakespeare. 15. Coming of Age in Samoa -- Margaret Mead. 16. Six Persimmons. 17. Paper Menagerie (the story) -- Ken Liu. 18. The Paper Menagerie (the book) -- Ken Liu. 19. David Shulman, Velcheru Narayana Rao and Arik Moran. 20. Ogata Kenzan on Wikipedia. 21. Sardar Gurcharan Singh: Father of Studio Pottery in India -- Sumita Dutta. 22. A Poetry Handbook -- Mary Oliver. 23. The Red Wheelbarrow -- William Carlos Williams. 24. The Time a Stiff Caught Fire -- Keith Yates. 25. You Can't Please All -- Bhupen Khakhar. 26. Openly In Total: Bhupen Khakhar's experiments with truth -- Nakul Krishna. 27. Selected writings of Bhupen Khakhar. 28. Creative Confession -- Paul Klee. 29. KG Subramanyan and Rabindranath Tagore on Amazon. 30. The Indianness of Indian Food -- Episode 95 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Vikram Doctor, mentioning Cavendish Bananas). 31. Chhaap Tilak Sab Chheeni -- Ghazal by Amir Khusro. 32. Think Again -- Adam Grant. This episode is sponsored by CTQ Compounds. Check out The Daily Reader and FutureStack. Use the code UNSEEN for Rs 2500 off. Check out Amit's online courses, The Art of Clear Writing and The Art of Podcasting. And subscribe to The India Uncut Newsletter. It's free!

Behavioral Grooves Podcast
The Behavioral Science Books We Just Couldn't Put Down in 2021 With Louise Ward

Behavioral Grooves Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 26, 2021 32:07


What a year for books 2021 has been! It seems like authors, editors and publishers have all been working overtime this year to bring us some incredible new content. Books that have challenged our beliefs, calmed our anxieties and transformed our habits.  To help us with the mammoth job of summarizing the best behavioral science books from 2021, we are joined by the incredible Louise Ward, who has read over 100 books this year! Louise is the co-host of the Behavioural Science Club, a LinkedIn group established in June 2020 now with over 5,000 members. If you haven't yet joined the club, you definitely should. Today. Alongside co-host Prakash Sharma, the Behavioural Science Club interviews top authors each week about fascinating new insights in human behavior. In our discussion with Louise, we noticed some trends among our favorite books. One is that we are moving past the presumption that humans are flawed and irrational. Books such as Useful Delusions and Nudge focus instead on the evolutionary usefulness of our biases and heuristics. In addition, we loved that after reading books on heavy topics such as suffering (The Sweet Spot), racial inequalities (The Person You Mean to Be) or conspiracy theories (How to Talk to a Science Denier), we were still left with a feeling of hope and optimism. And if you're new to behavioral science and wondering how to get started or underestimating the impact you can make as an individual, there was an empowering theme to this year's books too. Dive into You Have More Influence Than You Think to recognize how you can make an impact on people, You're Invited to reflect on the connections you make in your life or Non Obvious Megatrends to start noticing more of the world around you.  We would LOVE to hear your favorite books of 2021. Did your favorites overlap with ours? Please send us an email at info@behavioralgrooves.com, or connect with us on social media with your top reads of the year. Twitter: @behavioralgroov LinkedIn: Behavioral Grooves Instagram: @behavioralgrooves  Facebook: Behavioral Grooves Behavioural Science Club Links Join over 5000 members in the LinkedIn Group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/13871707/  More group info: https://lnkd.in/grjWMrQ  Twitter: @BehSciClub  Our Favorite Books of 2021 Louise Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know, by Adam Grant: https://amzn.to/3pNXdvE Brandsplaining: Why Marketing is (Still) Sexist and How to Fix It, by Jane Cunningham and Philippa Roberts: https://amzn.to/33Fltsu Think Big: Take Small Steps and Build the Future You Want, by Grace Lordan: https://amzn.to/3mo3JZ6 What We Owe Each Other: A New Social Contract for a Better Society, by Minouche Shafik: https://amzn.to/3eiJOXj Subtract: The Untapped Science of Less, by Leidy Klotz: https://amzn.to/3JaOqwY The Sleeping Beauties: And Other Stories of Mystery Illness, Suzanne O'Sullivan: https://amzn.to/3IHnuV5 Noise: A Flaw In Human Judgement, by Daniel Kahneman, Olivier Sibony and Cass Sunstein: https://amzn.to/3eiHgZf This is Your Mind On Plants, by Michael Pollan: https://amzn.to/3Ekqd3p Nudge: The Final Edition, by Richard Thaler and Cass Sunstein: https://amzn.to/3edkHFe Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, by Oliver Burkeman: https://amzn.to/3qiyFv9 Tim The Person You Mean to Be: How Good People Fight Bias, by Dolly Chugh: https://amzn.to/3rSsEHQ Anxiety at Work: 8 Strategies to Help Teams Build Resilience, Handle Uncertainty, and Get Stuff Done, by Chester Elton And Adrian Gostick: https://amzn.to/3EMgofA Useful Delusions: The Power and Paradox of the Self-Deceiving Brain, by Shankar Vedantam and Bill Mesler: https://amzn.to/3rVh8Ma The Unconscious: Theory, Research, and Clinical Implications, by Joel Weinberger: https://amzn.to/3H5P5xA  How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love, by Logan Ury: https://amzn.to/3GC8VR3 Non Obvious Megatrends: How to See What Others Miss and Predict the Future, by Rohit Bhargava: https://amzn.to/3phL4jv  Kurt You Have More Influence Than You Think: How We Underestimate Our Power of Persuasion, and Why It Matters, by Vanessa Bohns: https://amzn.to/3dCEKgb You're Invited: The Art and Science of Cultivating Influence, by Jon Levy: https://amzn.to/3ydBtgF How To Talk To a Science Denier, by Lee McIntyre: https://amzn.to/3lVT4Vk  Subtract: The Untapped Science of Less, by Leidy Klotz: https://amzn.to/3JaOqwY  The Sweet Spot: The Pleasures of Suffering and the Search for Meaning, by Paul Bloom: https://amzn.to/3piFKwr   A couple of non-2021 favorites:  Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers, by Robert Sapolsky: https://amzn.to/3H5ALp6 (Kurt) The Hype Machine: How Social Media Disrupts Our Elections, Our Economy, and Our Health--and How We Must Adapt, by Sinan Aral: https://amzn.to/3EgsSLv (Louise)  © 2021 Behavioral Grooves

The Tightrope with Dan Smolen
One Tired, Burned Out Workforce

The Tightrope with Dan Smolen

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 24, 2021 6:43


Future of Work Sherpa Dan Smolen reflects on the Holiday Season and one tired, burned out workforce. Merry Christmas to all who celebrate! Have you arrived at the holiday rested or refreshed? Or are you a burned out mess? According to a recent post on FortuneDaily: "The physical and emotional exhaustion that turns into workplace burnout doesn't happen overnight. It's the result of hundreds of microstressors on the job that ultimately lead to employees hitting the wall, mentally checking out, or even quitting their jobs entirely." As the Great Resignation extends, millions of people each month do leave their jobs, often with no new ones to replace them. Thus, one tired, burned out workforce reels. On the podcast this week, we reflect on a recent tweet authored by organizational psychologist and best-selling author Adam Grant: "The holidays shouldn't be a time to recharge. They should be a time to celebrate. If work is exhausting people to the point that they're using their time off to recover, then you might have a burnout culture." My commentary on our one tired, burned out workforce starts at 3:00 EPISODE DATE: December 24, 2021 Please Subscribe to The Dan Smolen Podcast on: – Apple Podcast – Android – Google Podcasts – Pandora – Spotify – Stitcher – TuneIn …or wherever you get your podcasts. You may also click HERE to receive our podcast episodes by email. Image credits: Artificial Intelligence, MangoStar_Studio for iStock Photo; podcast button, J. Brandt Studio for The Dan Smolen Experience.

Tech for Non-Techies
How to review your year with UX Designer Sang Valte

Tech for Non-Techies

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2021 31:54


“Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action” - Peter Drucker.  As 2021 comes to a close, it's useful to reflect on what worked, what didn't and how your industry evolved.  In this episode, you'll hear from Sang Valte, Senior UX Director at international design agency Jellyfish, and Design Standards Board Member at General Assembly, about how he reviews his year and how the UX changed in 2021. Questions to ask yourself for your end of year review: What have you gained in your health & wealth? Where have you lost? Sang thinks of wealth in relationships, friendships and knowledge, and health in terms of financial health, mental health and physical health. What have you done to further your skills in your career this year? Good UX designers must work to remove bias from their thinking to truly understand the users they make products for, says Sang. To sharpen critical thinking and dull bias, his recommended reads are Noise by Daniel Kahnemann and Think Again by Adam Grant. What have you done to build relationships for your career? Build relationships before you need them. When the pandemic hit in early 2020, Sang had a job offer, which suddenly fell through. He spent 5 months applying for jobs fruitlessly, and landed a dream opportunity when he reached out to someone he met at a design conference.  How has your industry changed in 2021? In your end of year review, think beyond your experience and think about how the sector evolved. Reflecting on the trends will help you capitalise on them in future. For example, Sang says that the UX field now has more senior women in it than ever before, and that there is a new interest in diverse thought.  If you want 2022 to be the year when you take your career to the next level, apply for Sophia's Break Into Tech Program. Sophia will teach you what you really need to know about tech to succeed as a non-technical professional, help you come up with a tailored career action plan and support you throughout your journey. APPLY HERE   Join the Tech for Non-Techies membership community. As a community member, you'll get: Monthly coaching with Sophia Matveeva Live masterclasses with global experts Supportive Online Community Library of masterclasses Exclusive Resources & Perks Learn more and sign up at https://www.techfornontechies.co/membership   Say hi to Sophia on Twitter. Following us on Facebook and Instagram will make you smarter. 

The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish
#127 Best of 2021: Conversations of the Year

The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2021 108:31


The Knowledge Project closes 2021 with a look back at some of the best conversations of the year. Featuring interviews from 10 of the most downloaded and acclaimed episodes of 2021, this collection of conversations offers a variety of insights into how to make crucial decisions, how to spark creativity, the best ways to avoid distraction, how to deal with loneliness, what traits to look for in a leader, the value of re-thinking your position, the importance of personal relationships, and much more.   Guests on this episode include: business leader Kat Cole, NBA basketball player Chris Bosh, loneliness expert Noreena Hertz, organizational psychologist Adam Grant, NASA astrophysicist Thomas Zurbuchen, video game expert Jane McGonigal, author Nir Eyal, author and entrepreneur Seth Godin, psychologist Angela Duckworth, and business expert Jim Collins.   -- Want even more? Members get early access, hand-edited transcripts, member-only episodes, and so much more. Learn more here: https://fs.blog/membership/ Every Sunday our Brain Food newsletter shares timeless insights and ideas that you can use at work and home. Add it to your inbox: https://fs.blog/newsletter/ Follow Shane on Twitter at: https://twitter.com/ShaneAParrish

Libros para Emprendedores
La Estrategia Más Poderosa para 2022 - Pasa a la Acción con Luis Ramos

Libros para Emprendedores

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 20, 2021 13:00


¿Qué estrategia aplicar este 2022 que te permita generar resultados diferentes, mejores? Hagamos cambios en nuestra interacción con los demás, provocando nosotros esos cambios positivos.Estas lecciones han sido extraídas del libro "Dar y Recibir", de Adam Grant.Recuerda que sólo con escucharlo no es suficiente. Aplícalo y obtendrás resultados, sí o sí. ¡¡Pasa a la Acción!!En esta página encuentras las notas del episodio y todos los enlaces mencionados:https://librosparaemprendedores.net/226 ¿Quieres saber cómo aumentar tu velocidad de lectura? Mírate este vídeo y quizás hasta la dupliques en sólo 20 minutos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0VqCZlLuEc¿Cómo conseguir levantarse temprano? 10 consejos... también apps útiles, para conseguirlo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJPmqy6Qi1cEn Youtube y en Instagram estamos publicando también contenido exclusivo. Suscríbete ahora:Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/c/LibrosparaemprendedoresNetInstagram: https://instagram.com/librosparaemprendedores Esta es nuestra página oficial de Facebook: http://librosparaemprendedores.net/facebook Además, recuerda que puedes suscribirte al podcast en:- Nuestra página: http://librosparaemprendedores.net/feed/podcast- iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/mx/podcast/libros-para-emprendedores/id1076142249?l=es- Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0qXuVDCYF8HvkEynJwHULb- iVoox: http://www.ivoox.com/ajx-suscribirse_jh_266011_1.html- Spreaker: http://www.spreaker.com/user/8567017/episodes/feed- Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/s?fid=81214 y seguirnos en Twitter ( https://twitter.com/EmprendeLibros ) y en Facebook ( https://www.facebook.com/EmprendeLibros/ ). See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos
Reset Your Relationship With Negative Emotions in 2022

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 20, 2021 3:09


The Happiness Lab returns on Jan 3 to help you take a fresh, new year look at the emotions that make us sad, angry or uncomfortable. We often either ignore these feelings, or wallow in them. Neither strategy will improve our happiness and wellbeing. So in 2022 join Dr Laurie Santos and guests including Brene Brown and Adam Grant to work out how to really approach feelings like grief, guilt and burnout more effectively from now on. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

Your Daily Writing Habit
Your Daily Writing Habit - Episode 974: A preacher, a prosecutor, and a politician...

Your Daily Writing Habit

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 19, 2021 6:48


Today's Sunday Story Time Selection - Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know by Adam Grant: https://amzn.to/3FbTzCd Join the author conversation: https://www.facebook.com/groups/inkauthors/ Learn more about YDWH and catch up on old episodes: www.yourdailywritinghabit.com

From the Bimah: Jewish Lessons for Life
Shabbat Sermon: Joyfully Wrong with Rabbi Wes Gardenswartz

From the Bimah: Jewish Lessons for Life

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 18, 2021 21:03


Adam Grant, the teacher of organizational psychology at Penn, a noted Ted Talk speaker, and the author of best-selling books, was recently on NPR sharing two very different takes on the phenomenon of being wrong. The first take concerned Adam himself when he was a teen-ager. He and a friend disagreed about a particular song in a Broadway musical. Each thought he was right. Eventually his friend summoned proof that he, the friend, was right. Adam was wrong. Adam could see the proof. Knew the proof was irrefutable. But could not get himself to acknowledge the error of his ways. His friend said: Adam, admit you are wrong. Adam could not bring himself to do it.

Created on Purpose
Changing Your Mind

Created on Purpose

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 17, 2021 17:36


This episode mentions a quote from an Instagram post that Adam Grant made a few weeks ago that says... "The hallmark of an open mind: not letting your ideas become your identity. If you define yourself by your opinions, questioning them is a threat to your identity. If you see yourself as a curious person or a lifelong learner, changing your mind is a moment of growth." Jordan breaks this down, why it's so hard, and how to start bringing curiosity in to untangle your beliefs and your identity.  Connect with Jordan On Instagram @jordanypendleton

World Economic Forum
Adam Grant

World Economic Forum

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 16, 2021 19:14


Organisational psychologist and podcaster Adam Grant, author of Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know, talks about his work and picks his favourite new books.

The Remarkable Leadership Podcast
A Minute to Think with Juliet Funt

The Remarkable Leadership Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 15, 2021 32:12


Do you think about how much you could get done if you were unburdened from busy work? Juliet Funt joins Kevin to talk about the difference between activity and productivity and what we could accomplish if we just had a minute to think. This episode was recorded during Virtual LeaderCon 2021. Key Points Juliet discusses the idea of busyness and the impact it has on our lives. She shares her thoughts about the future of engagement at work. She describes hallucinated urgency. She provides tips on how to clean up work so you can be in a ready stance. Meet Juliet Name: Juliet Funt Her Story: Author of A Minute To Think Reclaim Creativity, Conquer Busyness, and Do Your Best Work. She is a globally renowned keynote speaker, tough-love advisor to the Fortune 500, founder and CEO of the efficiency training firm, Juliet Funt Group. Worth Mentioning: Her book was nominated for the Next Big Idea Club curated by Malcolm Gladwell, Dan Pink, Susan Cain, and Adam Grant. She is an evangelist for freeing the potential of companies by unburdening their talent from busywork, and she has brought her powerful concepts to Spotify, National Geographic, Anthem, Vans, Abbott, Costco, Pepsi, Nike, Wells Fargo, Sephora, Sysco, and ESPN. This episode is brought to you by… The Daily Email, daily inspiration for leaders sent Monday-Friday every week. Kevin writes a short message to inform, inspire, engage, and focus you on becoming the best you and the best leader you can be. Book Recommendations A Minute to Think: Reclaim Creativity, Conquer Busyness, and Do Your Best Work by Juliet Funt The Prince of Tides by Pat Conroy Related Podcast Episodes Leadership Productivity Principles with Maura Thomas. Leadership Whitespace with Juliet Funt.

Networking Rx
Powerless Communication (EPS 412)

Networking Rx

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 14, 2021 19:35


Expanding on remarks he made on the Be Better Broadcast with Brandon Eastman, Frank Agin shares insights on the notion of powerless communication, as discussed in the book Give & Take by Dr. Adam Grant (@adammgrant). For more great insight on professional relationships and business networking visit https://www.amspirit.com/blog/ or contact Frank Agin at frankagin@amspirit.com.

Of Course I'm Not OK: The Podcast
66. Following Your Bliss

Of Course I'm Not OK: The Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 13, 2021 34:46


Happy Mid-December, Listeners! In this week's episode, Karen and Katie discuss how we can all follow our bliss when it comes to dreaming big (even if we aren't able to go anywhere at the moment). The pair also talks about vision boarding, waiting in line for concerts, and Karen as a MAJOR mic drop moment when she asks, "Post-COVID, WHO ARE WE NOW?" Thanks for listening - enjoy! Resources from today's episode: - Check out Adam Grant's WorkLife podcast: https://www.ted.com/podcasts/worklife

The Weekend University
4,000 Weeks: How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed - Oliver Burkeman

The Weekend University

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 10, 2021 66:43


In this interview, I spoke with Oliver Burkeman. Oliver is a writer, TED speaker, and the bestselling author of several books, including: “The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking”, and “Help! How to Become Slightly Happier and Get More Things Done.” This conversation focuses on Oliver's most recent book: 4,000 Weeks, which is about making the most of the very brief amount of time we all have here on the planet. There have been few books that have impacted me as much as this one, and if you can apply some of Oliver's insights and perspectives, they have the potential to dramatically transform your relationship with time, into one that feels life-giving, rather than crushing. It's not just me either. Adam Grant has called it “The Most Important Book Ever Written About Time Management”, while Krista Tippet says: “It invites nothing less than a new relationship with time – and with life itself.” You can learn more about Oliver's work at www.oliverburkeman.com, follow him on twitter @oliverburkeman, and get a copy of the book here. --- This episode is brought to you by The Weekend University's Day on Human Nature Online Conference, taking place on Sunday December 19th 2021. This will be a full day of interactive talks with leading psychologists, professors and neuroscientists exploring the hidden forces that drive human behaviour, with sessions on: - Does Altruism Exist? Attachment, Neurobiology & Optimal Wellbeing - Dr Graham Music, PhD - Fate or Free Will? The Neuroscience of Human Potential - Dr Hannah Critchlow, PhD - Twin Studies & The Nature vs Nurture Debate - Prof. Nancy Segal, PhD By attending live, you can interact with world class speakers and leading academics in real time, get your questions answered in the Q&A sessions, connect with like minded participants during the conference, and get lifetime access to the recordings and all available materials from the sessions. Additionally, The Weekend University guarantees an excellent learning experience. Therefore, if you attend and aren't fully satisfied with the day, you'll get a full refund - no questions asked. As a listener of the podcast, you can get a discount on your ticket, if you go to https://bit.ly/human-nature-2021, and use the discount code: POD when registering. --- Interview Links: - Oliver's website: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/ - Oliver's book: https://amzn.to/3cxS8BL - Get our latest psychology lectures emailed to your inbox: http://bit.ly/new-talks5 - Check out our next event: http://theweekenduniversity.com/events/

Libros para Emprendedores
Cómo Tener Ideas Originales - Pasa a la Acción con Luis Ramos

Libros para Emprendedores

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 8, 2021 10:36


Descubre lecciones rápidas y de fácil aplicación para saber cómo generar más ideas, que sean además originales y que también sepamos cómo validarlas.Estas lecciones han sido extraídas del libro "Originales", de Adam Grant.Recuerda que sólo con escucharlo no es suficiente. Aplícalo y obtendrás resultados, sí o sí. ¡¡Pasa a la Acción!!En esta página encuentras las notas del episodio y todos los enlaces mencionados:https://librosparaemprendedores.net/224 ¿Quieres saber cómo aumentar tu velocidad de lectura? Mírate este vídeo y quizás hasta la dupliques en sólo 20 minutos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0VqCZlLuEc¿Cómo conseguir levantarse temprano? 10 consejos... también apps útiles, para conseguirlo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJPmqy6Qi1cEn Youtube y en Instagram estamos publicando también contenido exclusivo. Suscríbete ahora:Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/c/LibrosparaemprendedoresNetInstagram: https://instagram.com/librosparaemprendedores Esta es nuestra página oficial de Facebook: http://librosparaemprendedores.net/facebook Además, recuerda que puedes suscribirte al podcast en:- Nuestra página: http://librosparaemprendedores.net/feed/podcast- iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/mx/podcast/libros-para-emprendedores/id1076142249?l=es- Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0qXuVDCYF8HvkEynJwHULb- iVoox: http://www.ivoox.com/ajx-suscribirse_jh_266011_1.html- Spreaker: http://www.spreaker.com/user/8567017/episodes/feed- Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/s?fid=81214 y seguirnos en Twitter ( https://twitter.com/EmprendeLibros ) y en Facebook ( https://www.facebook.com/EmprendeLibros/ ). See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Squeezing the Orange
The Positive Effects of ”Feedback-Sharing” on Psychological Safety

Squeezing the Orange

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 8, 2021 31:47


A longer-lasting approach to creating psychological safety is emerging, and it requires leaders to display more vulnerability. Rather than continuously soliciting feedback, this new approach suggests leaders share previous feedback they've received. Listen in as Dan and Akin make sense of "feedback-sharing" and its discovered benefits.  - Research Paper: 'Taking Your Team Behind the Curtain: The Effects of Leader Feedback-Sharing and Feedback-Seeking on Team Psychological Safety' by Constantinos Coutifaris and Adam Grant

TED Radio Hour
Changing Our Minds

TED Radio Hour

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 3, 2021 52:59


Admitting we're wrong is painful--even seen as a sign of weakness. But what if we take a more flexible approach? This hour: how rethinking ideas can be good for our brains and our relationships. Guests include former GOP congressman Bob Inglis, organizational psychologist Adam Grant, and civil rights activist Loretta J. Ross.

Amber on Podcasts
195: Burnout Is Not Inevitable - Here's How To Avoid It feat. Adam Grant

Amber on Podcasts

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 3, 2021 15:44


Burnout effects us all. You are either burned out yourself or you know someone who is. Burnout is identified as a syndrome by the World Health Organization and there are certain jobs and industries that are proven to cause more burnout. In this episode, you will learn the 3 main causes of burnout, how to prevent burnout, and the benefits of practicing empathy at work. Website: www.mytalkingdollars.com

Navigating the Customer Experience
152: Loyalty Redefined! How to Enrich the Lives of Your Customers – The Unbeatable Strategy with Fred Reichheld

Navigating the Customer Experience

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2021 36:13


Fred Reichheld is the creator of the Net Promoter system of management, the founder of Bain & Company's Loyalty practice and the author of five books including The New York Times bestseller, The Ultimate Question 2.0. He is currently a Fellow and Senior Advisory Partner at Bain, where he has worked since 1977. Fred is a frequent speaker at major business forums and his work on customer loyalty has been widely covered in The Wall Street Journal, New York Times, Financial Times, Fortune, Businessweek and The Economist.   His upcoming article to be published in November marks his 15th contribution to the Harvard Business Review. In 2012, he became one of the original LinkedIn influencers, an invitation only group of corporate leaders and public figures who are thought leaders in their respective fields. In 2003, Consulting Magazine named Fred as one of the world's 25 Most Influential Consultants.   According to The New York Times, he put loyalty economics on the map. The Economist refers to him as the “high priest” of loyalty. Reichheld graduated with honors both from Harvard College (B.A., 1974) and Harvard Business School (M.B.A., 1978). He's based in Cape Cod and Miami.   Questions   Could you share a little bit about your own journey? How is it that you got to where you are today? Could you explain to us what the Net Promoter system is and how companies should really be using it to yield the best results? Could you share with us maybe two or three things that you believe are contributing drivers of loyalty? What are some things that companies should look at in trying to enrich the lives of your customers? Do they need to understand what type of customer they're serving and does the generation matter? Could you share with us what is Customer Capitalism exactly? And how does that impact the consumer? Could you share with us what's the one online resource, tool, website or app that you absolutely cannot live without in your business? Could you also share with us maybe one or two books that have had the biggest impact on you? Could you share with us what's the one thing that's going on in your life right now that you're really excited about? It could be something that you're working on to develop yourself or your people. Where can our listeners find you online? Do you have a quote or a saying that during times of adversity or challenge, you'll tend to revert to this quote, it kind of helps to keep you on track, or at least get you back on track if for any reason you get derailed. Do you have one of those?   Highlights   Fred's Journey   Fred shared that early in his career at Bain & Company, he noticed companies similar to us all, some brand new, some quite mature, but they were all outperforming all of the things he learned at the Harvard. Some were crushing it and a good example was enterprise Rent-A-Car, who started out as a tiny little rental leasing agency in St. Louis, and has grown now to become the largest car rental company on Earth without ever having to tap public equity markets, it's still a private company. And you think, Gosh, what I learned at Harvard was a capital intensive business, low growth industry, low margins, there's no way that you could grow on internally generated cash.   So, when he went to meet with Andy Taylor, their CEO, he said, “Fred, there's no secret, there's only one way to grow a successful business sustainably.” And so, he was listening for this great secret. And he said, “You treat your customers so they come back for more and bring their friends.”   And that basic idea changed his world because that's what he now understands is the key to success. If your customers are coming back for more and bringing their friends, your economic flywheel will crush the competition.   What is the Net Promoter System and How Companies Can Use it to Yield the Best Results   Me: Amazing. So I had an opportunity to get an advanced copy of your book Winning on Purpose: The Unbeatable Strategy of Loving Customer. I really, really love it. I haven't finished reading it as yet, but I've gotten quite far in it. And so, I just wanted you to share with us.   Fred, in the book, especially in the preface and the foreword, you kind of mentioned that you have this net promoter system, but people are not actually using it the way how you created it to be used. Could you explain to us what the Net Promoter system is and how companies should really be using it to yield the best results?   Fred shared that he's long been troubled by the fact that financial accounting is how we run our businesses. And while financial accounting is very good at telling us when we've extracted a million dollars from our customers wallets, it does nothing in helping us understand when we've enriched a million customers lives or when our teams have done work that's meaningful and toward an important purpose.   And Net Promoter was his attempt at helping companies measure that important idea of all the lives you touch, how many are enriched? How many diminished? And that evolved into Net Promoter Score is based on one question, how likely you'd recommend us to a friend, 0 through 10.   And it turns out that when someone gives you a 9, and especially a 10, you've enriched their life, you've lived up to the golden rule of loving your neighbor.   And 0 through 6, you failed, you diminish their life. And so, this notion of Net Promoter Score is just keeping track of all the lives touched, how many enriched, how many diminished, and how many promoters, how many detractors, it's very practical for running a business because your promoters are your assets, who come back for more and bring their friends. But also, it's a little bit inspirational because putting your teams to work, and enriching lives and measuring that outcome and helping them learn how to do better, that's really helping them live the right kind of life.   The Contributing Drivers of Loyalty   Me: So, at the end of the day, we're all trying to build better relationships with our customers. Now, in your book, you also said that loyalty means investing time and resources in relationships.   Do you know maybe could you share with us maybe based on your experience and your research, you've definitely been in the thing way longer than I have; maybe two or three drivers that you think contribute to loyalty.   And this is loyalty in general, which I'm sure impacts business relationships, because I mean, loyalty is something that as human beings, we do link it to a person. For example, if you have an animal, your dog is loyal to you as the owner, in a relationship; you're loyal to the other person that you're in the relationship with, whether it's a personal or professional relationship. So could you share with us maybe two or three things that you believe are contributing drivers of loyalty?   Fred shared that he thinks it's quite poorly understood in this day and age when people are demanding loyalty and trying to get loyalty through gimmicks and marketing, so called loyalty programs. So, he thinks it does make sense to get back to basics.   He thinks loyalty is an investment from you and another person in a relationship. And you think, “Why would I invest in someone else?” Well, it's because they stand for what you believe in you.   You believe that they'll reciprocate and treat you reasonably and not abuse your trust and that you're in a position to actually do something to make their life better. Otherwise, you're just wasting your time.   A lot of people think about loyalty as, “Oh, I want them to be loyal to me.” He thinks the way to start is, “How can I invest in this relationship and love them, make their lives better?”   And that's what great companies' do, that's what great leaders do, they inspire their troops to find ways to enrich the lives of customers sustainably, of course, profitably. But the whole goal in a business is making your customers lives better. Because when you do that, you're investing in the right relationships, they come back for more, they bring their friends, they say great things about you, they become your public relations force, that's how great business works.   And he thinks we get drawn off center a little bit because the larger our company is, the more it's run through financial mindset. It's our accounting numbers that we seem to view as the framework of success, when in fact, no, it's this golden rule ideas, it's love thy neighbor as thyself. And when you do it, you'll see the results because when customers feel the love, they are loyal and that's at the core of loyalty, it's earning loyalty by enriching customers lives. And loyalty from employees, by putting them in a position to earn lives of meaning and purpose, by enriching the lives of customers that they touch.   Me: I like the fact that you mentioned that it's not just about loyalty in terms of you getting the person to be loyal to you, but it has to be earned and it's not something that can be bought. So I'm glad that you mentioned at the beginning that a lot of these loyalty programs and marketing initiatives that organizations have that they dub as loyalty programs are not actually programs that will make or even influence your customers to be loyal to you. So it's good that you identified for us that loyalty is something that is earned.   What Companies Should Look for to Enrich the Lives of Customers   Me: Now, in terms of showing your customers or enriching their lives regardless of the industry that you're in, whether you're a financial company, you sell insurance or you have credit cards, or you're a retail company, what are some things that companies should look at in trying to enrich the lives of your customers? Do they need to understand what type of customer they're serving and does the generation matter?   Fred shared that of course it does. And yet, he finds that the most successful businesses, whether dealing with teenagers today or octogenarians, it's understanding how to communicate effectively, how to always act in your customers best interest, to listen very carefully to how you're doing and what they need. Because at the core, a business is trying to solve the customer's problem, it's trying to turn a frown, into a smile, and the human process of understanding that, he doesn't think that's changed in thousands and thousands of years. Of course, the technologies we use, the innovative approaches, those open up wonderful new opportunities, but the basics, they haven't changed.   One of his colleagues at Bain, they joined about the same year, Scott Cook, who's the founder of Intuit, who has built TurboTax, and other very successful business, huge, huge success.   And he said, “Fred, you want a big business, solve a big problem for your customers.” And that's the right way to think about it, “I am going to be a reliable resource that is going to make a real difference in your life by turning that frown into a smile, and I'm going to measure my success that way.”   Obviously, profits are necessary but those who think of profits as the true objective, they're not going to grow a very big business very long because that's very selfish, “How much money can I extract from your wallet, get away from me, I'm not going to tell you anything about myself for what I need.” If he has someone who actually acts in a loving, caring way, they're a mutually beneficial relationship affair. But that's the kind of person he's willing to actually share his information with and give constructive feedback to because he wants them to succeed, he wants them to succeed in helping him solve problems.   What is Customer Capitalism and How it Impacts the Consumer?   Me: So, while I was reading part of your book as well, I bucked up on a term, Customer Capitalism. Could you share with us what is that exactly? And how does that impact the consumer?   Fred shared that he thinks people have a framework in their heads about capitalism that's just dead wrong, that maximize shareholder value as the underlying concept. Through the years, whether it's Milton Friedman, or Adam Smith, there's an ancient and an out of date framework that people call capitalism, that without giving it this name, it's financial capitalism, because it's based on this idea of profits and shareholder and investor is the king. He thinks that has changed over the last few decades, at least, to where now, there's so much capital in the world; you can raise millions and millions if you have a good idea.   What there's not infinite amounts of are good people with good ideas who are willing to work together in a team framework to serve others.   And the real capital in that system, our customers, all the cash flow comes out of customers' wallets.   So let's keep track of how many customers you have, how many are coming back for more, how many referrals you're getting, that was the basic, those are the keystone metrics in customer capitalism.   And more than anything, it's being clear about the purpose. If the purpose in the old school capitalism was maximizing profits and shareholder value, in customer capitalism, the purpose is to enrich the lives of your customers.   Bain did a survey of a couple 100 Senior Executives around the world, C suite executives and they found that only 10% believe that the primary purpose their business existed was to make customers lives better. They thought it was about profits or great place to work or balance duties to shareholders, stakeholders. He just thinks that is dead wrong. A good business, a sustainable business has to have a primary purpose of making their customers lives better.   Me: Amazing. One of the companies that you mentioned in your book when I was reading was Chick-fil-A and I absolutely love Chick-fil-A, both me and my daughter. But one of the things that I really love about Chick-fil-A was the fact that I remember I traveled a few years ago and my daughter wanted to get something from them on a Sunday and they're actually closed on Sundays and I thought that was awesome, from what I read that was a principle that their organization had and they've lived it up to this day and they've still been very successful even though they're closed on a day when they could be making more profit, as you mentioned.   Fred stated that the purpose of Chick-fil-A is certainly to enrich the lives that it touches. It's interesting, the founder, Truett Cathy was one of his early teachers in his business career, and they're totally different people. He's a Southern, he was a Southern Baptist, very, very conservative point of view. He (Fred) lives up in New England, Unitarian Universalist, you couldn't be more liberal in your religious thinking. And yet they had enormous overlap at the core, he picked a proverb from the Bible, that essentially, it says, “A good name is worth more than silver or gold.” Or in other words, your reputation is everything, which he thinks is so true.   And this notion of net lives enrich and Net Promoter Score, you think about when you enrich a life, you're living up to the golden rule, you're loving a neighbor, when you diminish your life, you're failing.   And so, the reason Chick-fil-A has been very interested and supportive of Net Promoter is because we're trying to achieve the same mission, this is back to Truett Cathy's words, he was inspired to turn frowns into smiles on his customers' faces and that is the purpose of the business.   So, then you mentioned Sunday, he asked him why he closed on Sundays and he said, “It's not a religious thing, Fred.” He's a very religious guy but he's not preachy, their business does not put biblical quotes at the bottom of their cups, and they're not proselytizing in the parking lot. They try to be models; they try to help their people live up to this standard of loving your neighbor. And closing on Sundays, he just knew that you could not run a restaurant and have the manager there 7 days a week, you'll kill yourself. And he said, “Given that, and I definitely want my store operator there running the place not delegating to an assistant.” He said, “We have to close a day and closing Sundays gives this signal that we care about our people, and we care about golden rule.”   As he said, “But you know, Fred, I go to other restaurants on Sunday, it's not like it's wrong to go out and eat at a restaurant on Sunday. It's just wrong for us to try and have our managers running a business 7 days a week.” And he thinks it's brilliant. And it is a signal. He thinks it reminds people that they're different. And you're right, their productivity, they have far higher sales per unit than any of the competitors. And those competitors are open 7 days a week. And it shows you when you get the purpose right; your business can crush the competition.   App, Website or Tool that Fred Absolutely Can't Live Without in His Business   When asked about online resource that he cannot live without in his business, Fred shared that it's a new one for him, he discovered a company through one of his Bain partners, it's called BILT. The reason they were intriguing to him was their goal is to help their customers, their customers tend to be consumer brands, like Weber, who makes grills and place at manufacturers and so on. They try to help them build promoters among their customers, to create more promoters.   And what they've done is just taken one of the most painful steps in every customer's journey episode, which is assembly and first use, using paper instructions, which these paper instructions are horrible, let's be serious, they're written by engineers whose English is certainly their second language and they're just totally unintuitive.   So, BILT takes the 3D CAD drawing from the manufacturer, and then turns it into great little 3D instructions on how to assemble and use your product effectively and it's free to the consumer. So you go to a Home Depot or Costco and you'll start to see BILT on the packaging, and you know that you're going to get that home and you'll be able to put this thing together quickly and you'll feel great about yourself or Home Depot will have their faucets or ceiling fans, things that are really tricky to install, or garage door openers, and you go to BILT and you put the product in it and it downloads up to date information about how to put it together in a very intuitive way where you can zoom in and pinch out and rotate upside down and voice activated to help you guide you through your journey, it's just brilliant.   Me: Nice, very good. They obviously saw a need in the market, as you said, a problem that people were having challenges with and complaining about and created a product that would be applicable to make people's lives easier.   Fred stated that try ordering a bicycle online, you get it back to your driveway and then you try to put it together using paper instructions and he thinks you'll see why BILT is so successful.   Me: Yes, I can just imagine and my coordination of doing things like that are extremely poor, so I'm sure I'd benefit from using BILT.   Books That Have Had the Greatest Impact on Fred   Me: Could you also share with us maybe one or two books that have had the biggest impact on you? I'm sure you have many because you've been around for quite some time and I'm sure you've had to read and engage with a lot of authors over the years that have definitely helped enrich your life and the lives of others. But is there maybe one or two that have definitely had a great impact on you over the years, maybe something you read a long time ago, or even something you read recently?   When asked about books that have had biggest impact, Fred shared that he read a lot of books. Actually, he listens to them now; his eyes are so strained from working at his computer and writing a book, he can't read in a relaxed way so he listens to Audible. Probably the most impactful book in the last 10 years was written by a guy who passed away, Clayton Christensen was a business school professor, who he got to know, he worked briefly at Bain and then worked at an entrepreneurial thing and ended up at Harvard.   He wrote a book called How Will You Measure Your Life? And he (Fred) thinks he's just absolutely right. And the reason that helped him is, he thinks you do need to measure a life carefully, that's what a Net Promoter Score is, of all the lives he touched, how many enriched, how many diminished?   That's how you measure a life. And he thinks Clayton put this in very human terms, and thinking about that, not just in a business sense, but all of your relationships in life, how do you think about investing in those relationships and being loving and loyal in a way that's not just correct in your mind, but you know the other party felt the love, you have to get feedback on how you enrich their life. So, How Will You Measure Your Life is a big one.   There's a recent book by Adam Grant called Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know, that he thinks is quite good. Adam is a guy that they must think along the same lines, because it was an earlier book that he wrote about it's called Give and Take. And he just makes the case that the world is full of people; there are some people who are givers, there are people who are matchers, they want a relationship to be in balance and then there are takers. And he said, one of the keys to life is avoid those takers, they're sociopaths, you can try and change them, but good luck.   And he thinks this is important and living a golden rule existence. Not all people want to be part of a community where people are treated with love and care, they'll abuse that community and he thinks if they can't be fixed, they have to be excluded. And then Think Again, Grant just says, we have these mindsets that are fixed, and he thinks of financial capitalism as a fixed mindset for 90% of the world and he needs to change the way people think about the purpose of business and how to enrich a life.    What Fred is Really Excited About Now!   Fred shared that he got the paperback galley of Winning on Purpose just a week ago and he can't take it off on his desk, but very pleased with the way it's come out. And that's going to be every day of his life for the next probably 90 days is how to get people to see the relevance of this book to their personal lives, not just their business lives because the subtitle of Winning on Purpose is “The Unbeatable Strategy of Loving Customers.” And loving customers, it doesn't sound like it's a business book, he doesn't know what it sounds, just a little flaky but it's not because this notion of loving thy neighbor as thyself is the core, it's the highest standard in human affairs. And what he's arguing and Winning on Purpose is that, that is how you win.   When you enrich lives, you have to do it sustainably, and you have to do it profitably, but that's not the magic, accountants can do the profits for you. The magic is figuring out how using your energy and ingenuity to love your customers and have them come to trust you and come back for more and bring their friends but it goes so far beyond business.   So, the great challenge he's got is getting people to recognize, he wrote this book for his granddaughters, infants who he wants them to see how you live the right life. And it sets out a way of measuring progress that he thinks is consistent with what Truett Cathy had in mind of building a reputation that you'll be proud of, and investing in relationships where you can earn people's loyalty.   It's probably a good rule of thumb anywhere to just don't spend time with a person unless you can figure out a way to make their life better. And by the way, the good news, chapter two and five of the book, demonstrate that companies that do this, they're the ones that get rich.   It's not clear from reading the Wall Street Journal, but every company, every industry, where they look at the Net Promoter Score, versus the competition, measured carefully, correctly, not just some self reported vanity metric, but real apples to apples.   It's the company with the highest Net Promoter Score who is growing faster and delivering better total shareholder value. And that's really good news.   But people are the mindset is fixed, they just don't get it. They say, “Oh, that's just some industries.” No, every time they're finding it, how did Andy Taylor grow to be the biggest car rental company on earth? How did Apple become one of the biggest companies on earth? Because they built a set of customers who are Promoters who are out there buying more stuff, and referring their friends and giving good feedback because they trust you, and making your employees feel special and loved, that's the flywheel that's going on. So, he's trying to convince the world that business works in a very different way than they probably learned in business school, or if they read the Wall Street Journal and The Economist.   Me: And you know, one of the things that kind of came in my head just now when you're speaking in terms of what we were taught in school versus what is reality, the reality is, a business isn't a static thing, it's made up of people and without people in the business, there is no business and people are human beings with feelings and emotions. And you get more out of people when they feel loved, when they feel listened to, when they feel heard, as you said, when you enrich their lives. So, if you really do live that principle, I'm sure you'll win in all aspects of your life.   Fred shared that he's worked at Bain & Company since 1977. So what is that 43 going on 44 years now. And they've been through good and bad times. For the last 10 or 20 years, it's been good times. If you look on Glassdoor, the place that rates businesses as great places to work, Bain, this year, it's the best in the world according to Glassdoor, it's always been one of the top several since Glassdoor started. And Bain hires lots of different kinds of people. But these are really ambitious, talented people. And even with that slice of ambitious people, when you look at what makes a person happy at work at Bain, they want to feel loved; they want to feel like they're a valued member of a team that wins with its customers. So it's an act of service and if you ask, remember he said the typical business person in the world, 10% of them think the reason their business exists is to enrich customer lives, at Bain, if you just ask everybody through the company, you find 60% to 70% of the people think the reason Bain exists is to make their clients more successful.   It's a servant culture where love is at the core, helping people succeed and putting smiles on faces and that's what makes it a great place to work.   And the irony is, he knows what makes, at least he thinks he knows what makes Bain a great place to work, it's that they are dedicated to helping their teams make a difference in their clients success, and be recognized and rewarded and part of a team that helps achieve that.   And it's financially successful but that's not the purpose, the purpose is making their customers lives better. And he thinks most great places to work lists, completely ignore that. They think it's refrigerators full of beer in the break room, pool tables and ping pong and cool fringe benefits, that's the fringe, the core is being on a team where you're playing a valued role at really making a difference in a customer's life.   Where Can We Find Fred Online   Website - https://www.netpromotersystem.com/ LinkedIn – Fred Reichheld   Quote or Saying that During Times of Adversity Fred Uses   When asked about a quote or saying that he tends to revert to, Fred shared that he wished he did. When he's preaching to whether it's at the dinner table or elsewhere, he goes back to this idea of how important loyalty is. You got to understand what your life stands for, what is your purpose as an individual and then the way you live that purpose is to invest in relationships with other people who share that purpose. And it's how you can invest and help those people succeed that he thinks helps you achieve your mission. So, “Choose your loyalties wisely, they guide your life and they define your legacy.”   Me: Love it, choose your loyalties wisely, they guide your life and define your legacy. Amazing. Love it, absolutely love it. And I'm sure every person on the face of this earth that wants to do good, wants to leave a good legacy behind. So the only way to do that, I believe, as you had said was to try and live by doing those actions on a daily basis, do it consistently because that's the only way when you leave this world you'll be able to leave that legacy.   Fred stated that and measure, so many people would say, “Oh, I can't measure love.” And he would say, actually you can, you can get feedback from your customers in a systematic Net Promoter framework and understand how many lives you've enriched and that is your legacy. And then you should be measuring your way toward the kind of life you want to lead.   Please connect with us on Twitter @navigatingcx and also join our Private Facebook Community – Navigating the Customer Experience and listen to our FB Lives weekly with a new guest   Grab the Freebie on Our Website – TOP 10 Online Business Resources for Small Business Owners   Links   The Ultimate Question 2.0 (Revised and Expanded Edition): How Net Promoter Companies Thrive in a Customer-Driven World by Fred Reichheld Winning on Purpose: The Unbeatable Strategy of Loving Customers by Fred Reichheld How Will You Measure Your Life by Clayton Christensen Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know by Adam Grant   The ABC's of a Fantastic Customer Experience   Do you want to pivot your online customer experience and build loyalty - get a copy of “The ABC's of a Fantastic Customer Experience.”   The ABC's of a Fantastic Customer Experience provides 26 easy to follow steps and techniques that helps your business to achieve success and build brand loyalty. This Guide to Limitless, Happy and Loyal Customers will help you to strengthen your service delivery, enhance your knowledge and appreciation of the customer experience and provide tips and practical strategies that you can start implementing immediately! This book will develop your customer service skills and sharpen your attention to detail when serving others. Master your customer experience and develop those knock your socks off techniques that will lead to lifetime customers. Your customers will only want to work with your business and it will be your brand differentiator. It will lead to recruiters to seek you out by providing practical examples on how to deliver a winning customer service experience!

The Seen and the Unseen - hosted by Amit Varma
Ep 253: Our Parliament and Our Democracy

The Seen and the Unseen - hosted by Amit Varma

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 29, 2021 183:28


A democracy is not just about voting, The rules of the game have to protect individuals, and institutions have to keep the government accountable. MR Madhavan joins Amit Varma in episode 253 of The Seen and the Unseen to discuss his efforts at empowering MPs and MLAs with knowledge -- and why we should not lose hope in our nation. Also check out: 1. PRS Legislative Research. 2. When You Could Only Buy Two Litres of Milk -- MR Madhavan. 3. The Functioning of the Indian Parliament -- MR Madhavan. 4. Dilli Door Nahin: Engaging With the Policy Process -- MR Madhavan. 5. Ulysses and Dubliners -- James Joyce. 6. Fixing Indian Education -- Episode 185 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Karthik Muralidharan). 7. Education in India -- Episode 77 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Amit Chandra). 8. Every Act of Government Is an Act of Violence -- Amit Varma. 9. Taxes Should Be Used for Governance, Not Politics -- Amit Varma. 10. Battles Half Won: India's Improbable Democracy -- Ashutosh Varshney. 11. A Life in Indian Politics -- Episode 149 of The Seen and the Unseen (w JP Narayan). 12. A People's Constitution -- Rohit De. 13. The First Assault on Our Constitution -- Episode 194 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Tripurdaman Singh). 14. The Right to Property -- Episode 26 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Shruti Rajagopalan). 15. The Federalist Papers -- Alexander Hamilton, John Jay and James Madison. 16. The Oxford Handbook of the Indian Constitution -- Sujit Choudhry, Madhav Khosla and Pratap Bhanu Mehta. 17. The Ideas of Our Constitution -- Episode 164 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Madhav Khosla). 18. India's Founding Moment — Madhav Khosla. 19. India's Greatest Civil Servant -- Episode 167 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Narayani Basu). 20. The Anti-Defection Law -- Episode 13 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Barun Mitra). 21. Speech to the Electors of Bristol -- Edmund Burke. 22. A Cricket Tragic Celebrates the Game -- Episode 201 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Ramachandra Guha). 23. Bindra's Wishlist -- Amit Varma. 24. The Business of Winning Elections -- Episode 247 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Shivam Shankar Singh). 25. Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know -- Adam Grant. 26. The Gray Man -- Mark Greaney. 27. PG Wodehouse on Amazon. 28. The Three-Body Problem -- Cixin Liu. 29. Project Hail Mary -- Andy Weir. 30. A Gentleman in Moscow -- Amor Towles. 31. The Lincoln Highway -- Amor Towles. 32. The Paper Menagerie -- Ken Liu. This episode is sponsored by Intel. This episode is co-sponsored by CTQ Compounds. Check out The Daily Reader, FutureStack and The Social Capital Compound. Use the code UNSEEN for Rs 2500 off. Please subscribe to The India Uncut Newsletter. It's free! And check out Amit's online course, The Art of Clear Writing.

The Ziglar Show
944: Who You Most Want Counsel From

The Ziglar Show

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 25, 2021 39:20


#944: I like mind games because I think that's what life primarily is. In this episode I wanted to get us focused on what counsel we most desire if it was critical. I asked the Ziglar audience this question; “You must spend 2 hours with someone for pure Q&A, you ask questions, they give answers. Who do you choose? And why?” People came back with answer such as Adam Grant, Matthew McConaughey, anyone in congress, Caesar Augustus, Ronald Reagan, any former president, Stephen Curry, Jordan Peterson, Elon Musk, Gary Vaynerchuk, Andy Andrews, C.S. Lewis and many others. But for more important than who is...why. To think, like with a genie in a bottle if you were to get one wish, if you could get two hours of counsel with anyone, and I did ask it to be a mortal, even if deceased, who would it be and why, with the why really helping give you focus on what your top priority for help and growth is in your life today. Whether you could truly meet with that person or not, it sheds light on where you now spend your counsel budget. Even if it's listening to podcasts or reading books, are you giving this area of focus priority? This is our show. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The FOX News Rundown
Give Thanks: America's Holiday Traditions Are Making A Comeback

The FOX News Rundown

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 25, 2021 26:44


The coronavirus pandemic changed how we celebrated Thanksgiving last year, with small gatherings and even virtual visits for the holiday. But this year, more Americans are traveling again to reunite with loved ones for the holiday. Despite the pandemic changing how we celebrate the holidays, Thanksgiving traditions with family are still going strong across the U.S.. Abby Hornacek, host of "Park'd" on FOX Nation and the "Getting Schooled" podcast, discusses her FOX News Radio Special “Thanksgiving Traditions” where she interviewed FOX News anchors and personalities about what they've been looking forward to this year. Plus, she shares with us some of her family's Thanksgiving traditions.   We're seeing more and more that people will not surround themselves with others whose ideas and opinions don't align with theirs. Organizational psychologist at Wharton and bestselling author Adam Grant joins today's Fox News Rundown with special guest host Dana Perino to discuss his latest book “Think Again.” He explains why it is important for people to stop defending their beliefs, but instead rethink them.   Plus, commentary by Robert Jeffress, Fox News contributor and pastor of the Dallas First Baptist Church

INspired INsider with Dr. Jeremy Weisz
"I Don't Have Time to Start a Podcast" & 10+ Reasons How Podcasting Will Save You Time

INspired INsider with Dr. Jeremy Weisz

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 23, 2021 26:19


Dr. Jeremy Weisz is the Co-founder of Rise25. He has been involved in podcasting for 11 years and was a Senior Producer for one of the early business podcasts; he assisted in putting all of their systems in place and helped them add volume, feature, and edify various business leaders. Dr. Weisz has also been running his podcast, Inspired Insider, since 2011. He has featured top entrepreneurs, founders, and CEOs of P90X, Atari, Einstein Bagels, Mattel, the Orlando Magic, and many more. In addition to running Rise25, Dr. Weisz owns a nutritional supplement business and runs his chiropractic and massage facility, Chiropractical Solutions & Massage. John Corcoran is a recovering attorney, an author, and was a former White House writer and speechwriter to the Governor of California. Throughout his career, John has worked in Hollywood, the heart of Silicon Valley, and has run his boutique law firm in the San Francisco Bay Area catering to small business owners and entrepreneurs. John has been the Host of the Smart Business Revolution Podcast since 2012. He has interviewed hundreds of CEOs, founders, authors, and entrepreneurs, from Peter Diamandis and Adam Grant to Gary Vaynerchuk and Marie Forleo. John is also the Co-founder of Rise25 Media, a company that connects B2B businesses with their ideal clients, referral partners, and strategic partners and generates ROI through their done-for-you podcast service. In this episode… If you already have meetings with your referral partners, potential clients, and other people you admire on your schedule, then that's all the time you need for a podcast. But if you don't have these people on your schedule already, a podcast is a great method to do so and get value from it. You gain and give value by having a podcast — from saving travel time, networking on a deeper level, fast-tracking your sales process, giving to your best relationships, and more. Having a podcast is the smart way to create value if you've been trying to achieve all this. So how do you begin?  Listen to this episode of the Inspired Insider Podcast with Dr. Jeremy Weisz, featuring Co-founder of Rise25 and the Host of the Smart Business Revolution Podcast, John Corcoran. Together they talk about saving networking and referral marketing time through podcasting, uncommon ways to give and get value from a podcast, and much more.

TED Talks Business
Indra Nooyi wants us to reimagine the return to work (part 1)

TED Talks Business

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 22, 2021 46:20


The longtime PepsiCo CEO is one of the world's most powerful women and Time's 100 most influential people. In the first of two rich conversations, she explains why she wrote more than 400 letters about her direct reports… to their parents. Indra and Adam discuss what she's learned about leadership, finding and being a mentor, championing ideas from below, and making big career decisions. They also explore some of the big questions around the future of work—from embracing flexibility to creating equitable arrangements for women to making family a real priority. This is an episode of WorkLife with Adam Grant, another podcast from the TED Audio Collective. You can find it, as well as the part 2 to this conversation, wherever you're listening to this.

Your Anxiety Toolkit
Ep. 211 People Pleasing (with Shala Nicely)

Your Anxiety Toolkit

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 19, 2021 42:28


In this week's podcast episode, we have the amazing Shala Nicely, author of Is Fred in the refrigerator? and Everyday Mindfulness for OCD.  In this episode, we talked about people-pleasing and how people-pleasing comes from a place of shame, anxiety, and fear of judgment from others.  Kimberley and Shala share their own experiences with people-pleasing and how it created more shame, more anxiety, and more distress. In This Episode: The definition of people-pleasing How it is common for people who have OCD and Anxiety disorders. How people-pleasing impacts people's self-esteem and their wellbeing. How people-pleasing anxiety keeps us stuck. How to manage people-pleasing in daily life. How self-compassion can help to manage people-pleasing. Links To Things I Talk About: Shala's Website shalanicely.com Shala's Book “Is Fred In the Refrigerator?” ERP School: https://www.cbtschool.com/erp-school-lp Episode Sponsor: This episode of Your Anxiety Toolkit is brought to you by CBTschool.com.  CBTschool.com is a psychoeducation platform that provides courses and other online resources for people with anxiety, OCD, and Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors. Go to cbtschool.com to learn more. Spread the love! Everyone needs tools for anxiety... If you like Your Anxiety Toolkit Podcast, visit YOUR ANXIETY TOOLKIT PODCAST to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like Your Anxiety Toolkit, I'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). Episode Transcription This is Your Anxiety Toolkit - Episode 211. Welcome to Your Anxiety Toolkit. I'm your host, Kimberley Quinlan. This podcast is fueled by three main goals. The first goal is to provide you with some extra tools to help you manage your anxiety. Second goal, to inspire you. Anxiety doesn't get to decide how you live your life. And number three, and I leave the best for last, is to provide you with one big, fat virtual hug, because experiencing anxiety ain't easy. If that sounds good to you, let's go. Welcome back, everybody. This is an episode I am so excited to share with you. Maybe actually “excited” isn't the word. I feel that this is such an important conversation. Today we have my amazing friend and someone I look up to and I consider a mentor, the amazing Shala Nicely. She's been on the podcast before. Everybody loves her, as do I. And interestingly that I say that because today we are talking about people-pleasing—the act of getting people to like you. Shala is very easy to love, but we are talking about how invasive people-pleasing can become, how problematic it can become, our own personal experience with people-pleasing, and what we have done and are continuing to do to manage people-pleasing behaviors. It is such a wonderful, deep, comprehensive conversation, so I cannot wait to share that with you in just a few minutes. Before we do that, I would like to first, of course, share with you the “I did a hard thing” for the week. This is from Jack, and I'm so excited because Jack said: “I haven't been able to drive on the highway since I had a severe panic attack a couple of months ago. I have felt trapped and it has put a strain on my life. I recently drove on the highway for an hour by myself. I felt anxious during it, but I was able to calm myself down. It was a huge step for me.” Amazing work, Jack. This is such a hard thing and you totally did it. This is so inspiring. You got through it. You actually stand your fear right in the face. So cool. Just proof that it is always a beautiful day to do hard things.  Let's move over to the review of the week. This is from YFWWFH, and this review said: “Life-changing in a meaningful way. I found Kimberley's podcast through another psychology podcast I've been listening to where she was a guest. I started listening to hers and was so happy. I found it. The insight this podcast offers and the expertise she shares are incredible and truly make a difference in the way you think about things and feel when struggling with some of the topics talked about. I truly love this podcast and the effect that it has.” Yay, that brings me such joy. Thank you so much for sharing that review. You can leave your reviews on iTunes. Please go over to iTunes to leave a review. The more reviews you leave, the more people we can reach, which means the more people I can help with this free resource.  That being said, let's move over to the show, such an important interview. I am so excited and I'm so curious to see what comes up for you as you listen. I hope it's helpful. I hope it gives you food for thought. I hope it gives you direction. And I just can't wait to share it with you. So let's go straight to the episode. I will see you guys next week. Have a wonderful day. It is a beautiful day to do hard things. Kimberley: Okay. So, you guys know that I love Shala Nicely, and today I have the one and only Shala Nicely talking with us about people-pleasing. And this whole conversation came organically out of conversations we've had recently. So, welcome, Shala. Shala: Thank you, Kimberley. And as you know, the love is mutual. So thank you for [04:42 inaudible] me again. Kimberley: Okay. I have so many questions and this is probably the most relevant topic to me in my stage of my recovery. You can share as much as you want to share, but I'm so grateful that we're talking about people-pleasing, because I feel like it runs rampant for those who have anxiety. Would you agree? Shala: Absolutely. Kimberley: How would you define people-pleasing?  Shala: People-pleasing to me is putting your own needs in the backseat so that you can do things that you think will make others happy or like you. You're not quite sure about that. You're mind-reading, you are estimating what other people might want or what society might want. I think people-pleasing is not just, “I'm pleasing the individual person.” It could be, “I'm pleasing a culture, a society, a family.” But I think it's all about putting your own needs in the backseat and doing what you think other people want in order to make them happy, but really it's in order to reduce your own anxiety. Kimberley: Right. So, there's so much there you said that I want to pull apart. So, you emphasized “You think,” and I think there is a major concept there I want you to share. We want to please people. Of course, we want to please people. We like seeing smiley, happy faces. I don't like seeing sad faces and angry faces. But so much of people-pleasing is based on what in our minds we think they want. Can you share your thoughts on that? Shala: If you look at people-pleasing behavior–I'll take me as an example–obviously, it starts with an intrusive thought, “What if they don't like me? I've not done well enough. They're going to think less of me, drop me,” et cetera, et etcetera. So, I think it starts with some sort of intrusive thought like that. And from there, it goes into how to answer that what-if. And the what-if is made up. We don't actually know it's a real problem. It's an intrusive thought that has come in. It may or may not be a problem. And so, if we engage in this, we're trying to figure out, “Well, how can I make sure that what-if doesn't happen?” And so, you're dealing with a really made up situation. And so, there's really no data there for you to know what to do. And so you're guessing. “Gosh, what if this person isn't getting back to me because I did something wrong and they don't like me? And I need to do something to show them how much I like them so that they'll change their mind about me.” The whole thing is based on the premise that what if this person doesn't like me, which is probably 99% of the time not even a premise. So, we're guessing all over the place in both guessing there's a problem we have to solve. And then guessing how to solve that because we don't really know if there are problems. So we have to whack it together, you might say. Kimberley: Right. I remember early in my marriage, me getting my knickers in a knot over something, and my husband saying, “What's happening?” And I'm like, “Well, you want me to do such and such this way?” And he was like, “I've never said that. I've never even thought that. What made you think that I would want you to be that way?” And I had created this whole story in my head. For me, that's a lot of how people-pleasing plays out, is I come up with a story about what they must want me to be, and then I assume I have to follow that. How does it play out for you? Shala: I think “story” is the right word to use there. You create this whole story in a scenario. It's got main characters and a plot and the ending is always horrible, and it becomes very believable in your mind. The thing is it's in your mind. We've made it all up. But those stories convey very powerful emotions and then we're acting to somehow get rid of those emotions, which were created by the story that we made up in the first place. Kimberley: Right. And that was the second thing that you said that I think is so compelling, is for me in my life goal of reducing people-pleasing behaviors, I will be on this journey for the rest of my life. I'm pretty confident of it. It's a matter that I have to learn how to sit with the feeling instead of just going into people-pleasing to remove that feeling. Is that how you would explain it for yourself as well? Shala: Yes. And I will echo your sentiments. I will be right alongside you on this journey of trying not to people-please the rest of my life. And I think it's sitting with some uncomfortable emotions and it's really sitting with the uncertainty of “we don't know” what other people think. And it's easy, especially if you have anxiety to assume the negative because that feels like some sort of certainty. “Oh, they must not like me.” That's actually sometimes a more comfortable thought than “I don't know,” fit with “I just don't know.” Kimberley: Right. Because when we tell ourselves “They mustn't like us,” at least then we don't have a place to work from. We can gain control back. Whereas if we are not certain, that's a really uncomfortable place. I know as we were talking, do you think this shows up the same for folks with OCD as it does for folks who don't have OCD? Do you think there's a difference or do you feel like it's the same? Shala: That's a good question. I might only be able to offer a biased answer because I have OCD and I work with people with OCD. So, that's going to be the frame of reference that I'm coming from most often. I think that with OCD, it could come from a foundational place of really thinking that you're not worth very much. I think that comes a lot because OCD spends its days if you're untreated, yelling at you and telling you are horrible and nitpicking every little thing that you do wrong. And it's like living with an abusive person when you have untreated OCD, especially when it goes on for years and years, which happens to so many of us with OCD. And if you hear that for however long–months, years, whatever–you start to believe it. And then you don't think you are worth pleasing, and you almost feel like, “Gosh, maybe if I made people around me happy, maybe if I got this positive feedback from other people that they think I'm worthwhile, then somehow maybe all this in my head will stop.”  I think people-pleasing for people with OCD can come from that place where they just have internalized years of abuse by their own mind that they feel like they can't escape until they find exposure and response prevention and work through all that. But even after that, they can still have this foundational belief that “I'm just not worth anything.” And that can drive a lot of people-pleasing behaviors that can linger even after somebody's gone through what would be considered a successful course in ERP. Kimberley: Yeah. That's really interesting. As you were talking, I was comparing and contrasting my eating disorder recovery. I was thinking about this this morning. My eating disorder didn't actually start with the wish to be thin. It started with pleasing other people. So, my body was changing and I was getting compliments for that. And then the compliments felt so good. It became like something I just wanted to keep getting, almost compulsively keep getting. And so then, it became, “How can I get more?” People-pleasing, people-pleasing. “Oh, they liked this body. Well, I'll try and get that body. Oh, they complimented me on how healthy my food was. Okay, I'll do that more in front of them.” So, it's interesting to compare and contrast. People-pleasing was the center point of my eating disorder and the starting point of my eating disorder. So, that's really interesting. You talked about people-pleasing behaviors. What do you think that is for you? What would that look like? Shala: People-pleasing behaviors can be big or small. It could be something like a friend calls you to go out to dinner. You don't really want to go out to dinner. You really want to sit in and watch your latest Netflix binge show, but you feel like you can't say no. So you go out to dinner. That could be something on the smaller end, I think. Then there's on the really large scale, which I've done, and I talk about in more detail in my memoirs, Is Fred in the Refrigerator? about my journey with OCD, which is not breaking up with somebody because you're afraid to hurt their feelings. And you can take that all the way down the aisle, which I did.  And so, I think that people-pleasing behaviors really can run the gamut from small seemingly innocuous things. “Oh, it's just an evening,” to life-changing decisions about your partner, about how you live your life, about where you live, about your work, about how you approach, all of that. And that I think makes people-pleasing sometimes hard to identify because it doesn't fit neatly in a little box. Kimberley: Yeah. That's interesting. And I love the way that you share that. What's interesting for me is that most of my people-pleasing in the past have been saying yes to things that I don't want to do or things I want to do, but I literally don't have time for. So I'm saying yes to everything without really consulting with my schedule and being like, “Can I actually fit that in on that day?” Just saying yes to everything, which I think for me is interesting. A lot of the listeners will remember, is I got so the burnt out and sick, because I'd said yes to everything six months ago. Because six months ago I agreed to all these things, now I'm on the floor, migraines or having nothing because I just said yes to everything. And so, for me, a lot of that, the turnaround has been practicing saying no to plan for the future, looking forward, going, “Will I have time for that? Do I want that? Does that work for me? Is that for my recovery?” How have you as either a clinician or a human started to practice turning the wheel on this problem? Shala: It's hard for me to think how to the answer to that because there are so many ways to approach it and it's a complex problem. And so, I have approached it in a number of ways. The first thing that comes to mind is really boundaries because a lot of this is about setting boundaries to protect your own time and to protect what you want to do. So, that's one of the things that I have really worked on, is becoming clear on what I think is acceptable for me to be doing and what is not acceptable for me to be doing in terms of my own physical and mental health. It's so easy to say yes to things, especially if it's months down the road, “Oh, that'll be fine, I'll have time to do that.” And then you get to, you're like, “Okay, I don't have time to do that.” And then you're wearing yourself out and all of that. And I think that happens a lot with people-pleasing because again, you're putting your own needs, especially for rest and recovery on the back burner in order to do things that you think will make somebody else happy.  And so, I think really working on boundary setting. So I'm coming from a perspective of having OCD and treating OCD. Boundary setting is an exposure. So, it is about creating an uncomfortable situation because it involves saying no. And if you say no, sometimes you're going to disappoint people. And if you're just getting into the process of saying no, and people are expecting that you're going to say yes because you say yes to everything, you can often get some pretty negative feedback. “What do you mean no? You've always said yes.” Kimberley: You're the “yes” girl. Shala: And so then, that feels even more jarring, like, “Oh, see, it's coming true. People don't like me.” And so, that becomes even more anxiety provoking and thus an even better exposure, but even harder. And I think that thinking of it as setting boundaries to protect your own times so that when you do say yes to something, you are there as fully as you can be because you're well-rested in terms of your body and your mind and your health and all of that. When you don't have good boundaries, you end up feeling very resentful because you haven't been able to take care of yourself. And so, in fact, by not setting good boundaries, you can't actually be there for people when they need you because you're too run down. And that is, I think, the big lie about these people-- one of the many big lies about this people-pleasing thing is that, “Well, I got to do all this to make people happy.” Well, in essence, you're not putting your own oxygen mask on first. And so, you can't. Even if there was something you really could do that would really help somebody else, you don't have enough energy to do it.  So, I think really realizing that boundaries are the way to not have that resentment, to allow you to be fully there with the things you do want to do with all your heart and energy. And so then, you are actually really achieving your goal because you can really help people, as opposed to saying yes to everything and you're spread so thin, you're not enjoying it, they're not enjoying it, and it's not achieving the goals that you had in mind. Kimberley: Yes. It's so exactly the point. So, boundaries is 100%, I agree. I'll tell you a story. You know this story, but the listeners might not. Once I did a podcast that got some negative feedback and I called you, understandably concerned about getting negative feedback, because I don't like-- I'm one of those humans that don't really love negative feedback. Shala: I'm one of those humans too. Kimberley: I had said to you, this is literally my worst fear. One of my worst fears is being called out and being told where you've made a mistake. What was really interesting for me is going through that and saying, “Okay, but I did, it is what it is. I wouldn't change anything. And here's what I believe.” I came out of that instead of going and apologizing and changing everything. I came out of that actually feeling quite steady in my stand because I had acknowledged like, “Oh, even when things don't go well, I can get through it. I can stand on my two feet. I can get through those,” which is something I hadn't ever really had to practice, is really standing through that. And I thought that that was a really interesting thing for me, is a lot of the reason I think I was people-pleasing was because the story I was telling myself was that I wouldn't be able to handle it if something went wrong, that I wouldn't be able to handle people knowing that I had made a mistake or so forth. But that wasn't true. In fact, all of a sudden it felt actually a bit of freedom for me of like, “Oh, okay. The jig is up. I can chill now.” Have you found that to be true of some people or am I rainbow and unicorn? Shala: I love that because I think it's like what we do with people with social anxiety. They are afraid of going out in public in certain situations and having somebody evaluate them negatively. And one of the things that we do with those exposures is actually, let's go out and create some of these situations that your social anxiety is afraid of. Let's go into a shopping mall in the food court and spill a Coke on the floor while everybody's looking at you. And then process through, what was that like? Well, I just stood there and they came and cleaned it up and everybody went back to their meal and we went on. Huh, okay. That wasn't as bad as I thought it was.  And I think that's very akin to what you're saying, is we build this up in our head that if we're rejected, if somebody doesn't like us, if we disappoint somebody, that's going to be catastrophic. And inevitably, it is going to happen unless you isolate yourself in your house, that somebody is not going to like you, somebody is going to give you a bad review, and being able to say, “Yup, that is okay. I don't have any control over that. And I can handle that. That doesn't devalue me as a person because they gave me a bad review or bad feedback or whatever.” Because if we think about what we each do, like I've bought products before that I've written bad reviews for because I didn't like it or it didn't work for me. I think everybody has. And even if you didn't write a review, you thought it in your head. So, all of us have things we like and don't like, and that's okay.  What you're talking about is you have those experiences and then you realize, “Wait, that is okay.” And then you feel free, like, “Okay, look at me. I can make mistakes.” You're less compelled. Continue doing this because you're like, “Wait, there's freedom on the other side of this where I don't have to try to be pleasing people all the time.” Kimberley: Right. Or in addition to that was-- and this is true in this example of, I think it was a podcast that I had put out, was people cannot like what I did but still like me in other areas. That blew me away. I think that in my mind it was so black and white. It's like, if they don't like one thing, they're going to knock you out, where it's like no. People can hold space for things they like and things they do like. Shala: That is such important. Kimberley: Right. You also just said something and I want you to speak to it, is some people people-please by going above and beyond, but you also just brought up the idea of some people just don't leave their house. What would that look like, because they're people-pleasers? Shala: Well, I think that is the extreme case of any kind of anxiety-driven disorder, where you're trying to avoid having to be in a situation where others have expectations of you that you feel that you can't meet, and so you narrow your world down to avoid those situations to avoid the anxiety. And I don't think that's just with people-pleasing. That's obviously what agoraphobia is about—people not leaving their homes because they're trying to avoid situations that are going to trigger panic attacks. But I think people with anxiety disorders in general can start making choices to avoid anxiety that end up not allowing them to lead the lives they want to lead or to take care of themselves. Kimberley: Yeah. I mean, I think that's the question for everybody, even for those who are listening, I would say. If you're thinking, “Oh, this doesn't apply to me,” it's always good to look like, “What am I avoiding because of the fear that I'll be disproved?” or someone will give you a bad review and so forth, because I think it shows up there quite often. Shala: Yes. And in fact, there is a really good article—maybe we can put a link in the show notes—that Adam Grant from Wharton Business School wrote in the New York Times about what straight A students get wrong. And I think it goes right to the heart of what we're talking about because he referenced people who are looking for straight A's, which is an institutionalized form of approval, will potentially take easier classes that they can get an A in versus something they really are interested that they might not do as well in. And so, they are not pursuing what's important to them because they're pursuing the A, and therefore head in a direction that maybe isn't the direction that would be best for them to have. Kimberley: Right. And you just hit the nail on the head because so much of recovery from people-pleasing is actually stopping and going, “Do I want this? Does this actually line up with my values? Am I doing it for other people?” I've heard many clients say, “I do what other people tell me to do and what they want because I actually have no idea of what I want.” That's scary in and of itself. Shala: And that is a really tough problem for people with anxiety disorders because when you have an anxiety disorder, you're used to doing what the disorder says and the disorder can really run your life. When you get better from the anxiety disorder, it's easy to keep doing the things that you were doing that didn't necessarily seem compulsive but may have been because they're just part of your life, without ever stopping to step back and say, “Well, do I need to be doing this?” I'll give you a personal example. I live in Atlanta and there's lots to do in Atlanta. I've lived here for a long time. I think I felt a need that I “should” be out and doing things because I live in a big city and there's so much to do and I need to be doing it. And so I'd have this story in my head that I need to be out and visiting attractions, the aquarium, the restaurants. We have this really cool food court called Ponce City Market. While those things are fun and I do enjoy going to them sometimes, it almost felt like I should do this because this is what people do. They're out and about and doing things, almost like I'm pleasing a societal norm, like this is what you do if you live in a big city.  Well, COVID actually has really helped me recognize, “You know what, I actually don't need to get up on Saturday morning and pack my schedule full of all sorts of things that I think I should be doing. I can actually just sit in my house and do things that I might want to do.” And so as you know, I've been doing all sorts of things lately just to try stuff out. I'm taking an oil painting class, which still scares me to death. And I'm taking French lessons because I want to learn how to speak French. And I've bought these art magazines because I really like art and I just want to look at it. And I'm just letting myself explore these various things to find out what I do like. And then once I've been through this process and find what really floats my boat, then maybe hey, one weekend I can go to the aquarium because I want to, because it meets some value or need I have and do some painting instead of trying to meet this idea of what I should be doing that's trying to please society and what my role in society should be, which I think is very easy for people with anxiety disorders and OCD to do, is let other people make the rules, the disorder, your family, your spouse, the society in general, as opposed to just sitting back and saying, “What do I really want?” And the answer to that might be, “I don't know.” And instead of rushing out to do something because it feels better to just be doing something than to sit with the uncertainty of “I don't know,” letting yourself sit in that and go, “Well, what can I maybe try to see if I like it?” Kimberley: Right. And I will add to that because you and I have talked quite a bit and I've learnt so many inspiring things from you as I've watched you do this. What was interesting for me is, a part of that for me was choosing things that people don't actually like. Some of the choices I've made–things I want to do with my time or that I've said no to–do disappoint people. They do disappoint people and they might tell you you've disappointed them. And so, for me, it's holding space for that feeling, the shame or the guilt or the sadness or whatever the emotion is, but still choosing to do the thing you wanted to do. It's not one or the other. You don't do things just because you haven't disappointed someone. You can also choose to do something in the face of disappointing other people, right? Shala: Yes. And I think it's inevitable. You're going to disappoint them. Kimberley: It sucks so bad. Shala: Because you're not going to have the same wants and needs as everybody else. And so, it's inevitable that if you start figuring out what you want to do and trying some things out, you can't do all the other things everybody else wants you to do. Kimberley: Yeah. I know. And it's so frustrating to recognize that. But as you've said before, tens of thousands of people could love a product and tens of thousands of people could hate a product. Lots of people will like me and lots of people won't like me or the things that we do or the places we want to go and so forth. I think that's a hard truth to swallow, that we won't please all the people. Shala: Yeah. And I'll tell you a story that I think illustrates that, is I read this book for a small book club that I'm in, and one of the members had suggested it. I just went and grabbed it, bought it. I didn't really read what kind of book it was. And I was loving it. It was really good. It was like this mystery novel. And then we get to the last, I don't know, 20 pages. And it turns into this psychological thriller that honestly scares the pants off me, but it was wrapped up so well. I was just sitting in shock on the floor, reading this thing, like, “Oh my gosh.” It was so good, yet so terrifying. So I got online on Amazon just to look at the book because it had just gone right over my head that this was a thriller, and I don't normally read thrillers. I just wanted to go on and see. And I was expecting, because I loved this thing, to see five-star reviews across Amazon for this book because I thought it was so amazing. And I got on, and the reviews for it were maybe three point something stars. I started reading and some people went, “I hated this. It was horrible.” They hated it as much as I loved it. And that to me was just a singular example of you cannot please everyone. I love this book, other people hate this book. There were lots of people that were in between. And that doesn't say anything about the writer. The writer is a whole complete awesome person, regardless of what any of us think about what she wrote. Kimberley: Right. And she gets to write what she wants to write, and we get to have our opinions. And that's the way the world turns. Shala: And I think recognizing she doesn't have any control over what I think, I might even write a five-star review just for whatever reason and really hate the book. So, even if you get a positive review, you don't actually know that it's true. I think this is all about understanding that it's not about not caring about what people think because that's really hard. It just numbs you out and cuts you off. I think it's about going into the middle. It's not about people-pleasing. It's not about not caring. It's about recognizing you don't have control over any of that and living in that uncertainty. I don't know what people think. I don't have control over what people think. And even if they tell me one thing, that could actually not be what they think at all. And that's okay. Kimberley: Right. Such an amazing point. I'm so glad you brought that up because I actually remember many years ago saying to my husband, “I've decided I don't care what people think.” Well, that lasted about 12 and a half seconds because I deeply care what people think. But it doesn't mean that what they think makes my decisions. And I think that's where the differentiation is. A lot of the people who are listening, there's absolutely no way on this world they could find a way to not care and not want to please people. It's innate in our biology to want to please people. However, it gets to the point where, is it working for you? Are you feeling fulfilled? Are you resentful? These are questions I would ask. Are you fulfilled? Are you resentful? Are you exhausted? What other questions would you maybe ask people to help them differentiate here or to find a way out? Shala: Am I really enjoying this? Do I really want to do this? Why am I doing this? Kimberley: Yeah. What emotion am I trying to avoid? What would I have to feel if I made my own choice? Yeah. There's some questions I would have people to consider. Okay. So, one more question. You make a choice based on what you want. You do or you don't please people. Let's say for the hell of it you dissatisfy somebody. What do you do with that experience? Shala: First, I think you recognize. You go into this, recognizing that is almost certainly going to happen. There are very few certainties in life. That's probably one of [35:11 inaudible]. Kimberley: You will disappoint people. Shala: Yeah. You're going to disappoint people. And then I think really going to a place of self-compassion. And I'm going to turn it back over to you because you just published an amazing, amazing book that I cannot recommend enough about self-compassion in the treatment of OCD with exposure and response prevention. And I'd love to hear what you think about how you could incorporate self-compassion into this, especially when you do disappoint somebody because I think that's so important.  Kimberley: Yeah, no, I love that you swing at my way. I think the first thing is to recognize that one of the core components of self-compassion is common humanity, which is recognizing that we're all in this together, that I'm just a human being. And human beings aren't ever going to be perfect. Only in our minds that we create the story that we were going to be. So, a lot of self-compassion is that common humanity of, I am a human, humans make mistakes, humans get to do what they need to do and want to do and that we're not here to please people, and that our worth is not dependent on people enjoying and agreeing with us. And I think that's a huge reason that my people, like you've said, people-please is they're constantly trying to prove to themselves their worth. So, I would recognize first the common humanity.  And then the other piece is it hurts when you disappoint someone. And so, I think it's being tender with whatever emotion that shows up—sadness, loss, anger, frustration, fear. A lot of it is fear of abandonment. So I would really tend to those emotions gently and talk to them gently like, “Okay, I notice sadness is here. It makes complete sense that I'm feeling sad. How can I tend to you without pushing you away?” Again, I think sometimes-- I've seen this a lot in my daughter's school. I've seen this sometimes, the school has said, “When you're feeling bad about yourself, just tell yourself how good you are.” And I'm like, that's really positive, but it actually doesn't tend to their pain at all. It skips over it and makes it positive.  So I think a big piece of this is to just hold tender your discomfort and find support in like-minded people who want what you want and who are willing to show up. You and I have said before the Brené Brown quote like, “Only take advice from people who are in the ring with you.” And that has been huge for me, is finding support from people who are doing scary things alongside me. Do you have any thoughts?  Shala: Yeah. I think the more that you do this, the more that you're willing to take care of yourself, because I really do think working on people-pleasing is learning how to take care of you. And that's so important. And the more that you will do that and go through these very hard exercises of saying no and disappointing people, and then compassionately holding yourself and saying, “It's okay,” like using the common humanity, recognizing we're all in this together. Everybody feels like this sometimes. I think the more you do it, then you start to disconnect your worth from other people's views. And that is where a whole new level of freedom is available to us.  I think that sometimes people-pleasing, because it can be so subtle, isn't necessarily addressed directly in therapy for anxiety disorder. Sometimes it is when it's really over. But a lot of times it's not, and that's not the fault of the therapist or the client or anything. It's just, it's so subtle. We don't even realize we're doing it. And so, we finish therapy for anxiety disorders, we feel a lot better, but there's still a lot of this “should” and “have to,” societal expectations or expectations of other people, which we feel we're driving our life and we don't have any control over. And really working on this allows you to recognize that you are a whole good, wonderful person on your own, whether or not other people are pleased with you or not. But that takes a lot of consistent work, big and small, before you can start to see that your worth and other people's thoughts about you are two separate things that aren't connected. Kimberley: Right. Oh, I'm going to leave it there, because that's the mic drop right there. I love it. Shala, thank you for coming on and talking about this. I really wanted your input on this instead of it just being a podcast of mine. So, thank you. I love your thoughts on this. Where can people hear more about you, your book? Tell us all the things. Shala: Sure. So, my website is shalanicely.com. So, anyone can go there, and I have three different blogs that I write, all sorts of information about how to manage uncertainty and OCD because that's my specialty. My memoir, Is Fred in the Refrigerator?: Taming OCD and Reclaiming My Life, in that I talk a lot about how I dealt with people-pleasing. And in fact, the chapter called Shoulders Back, which is one of the techniques—I said there were many that I used for people-pleasing, that's one of the techniques that I use—that chapter talks about my journey in learning about how to work through some of this by really putting your shoulders back and acting like all that stuff you hear in your head is relevant. So, that could be a resource for people as well. Everyday Mindfulness for OCD, which I co-wrote with Jon Hershfield, that also has some information on self-compassion as well if people want to learn about writing self-compassion statements. But again, I would also send people to your amazing brand new workbook, which is the only workbook that I know of, the only book that I know of, that talks about doing ERP in a self-compassionate way. So, it's completely integrated together. And I think that is so important for building a foundation for a good OCD recovery. So, I would definitely send people your way. Kimberley: Thank you, friend. Shala: You're welcome.  Kimberley: Well, there are so many parts of the people-pleasing and the tools in your book as well. I know we've talked about that and it's one of my favorite books of all time. So, definitely for listeners, go and check that out. I am so grateful that you came on.  Shala: Well, thank you. I'm just so honored to be here. It's always so much fun to talk with you about these topics. So, thank you. Kimberley: So important. Thank you so much, and I just am so grateful for you. ----- Please note that this podcast or any other resources from cbtschool.com should not replace professional mental health care. If you feel you would benefit, please reach out to a provider in your area.  Have a wonderful day and thank you for supporting cbtschool.com.

The Next Big Idea
EXPONENTIAL AGE: Everything Is Accelerating. Who's at the Wheel?

The Next Big Idea

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 18, 2021 65:56


We've all seen the meme. Two images, side by side. On the left, a photo of Jeff Bezos circa 1998. His hair is receding, his smile geeky, his sweater bulky and brown. The caption? “I sell books.” Then, on the right, there's Jeff in 2017. His pate is as smooth as Lex Luther's, his biceps as bulbous as Vin Diesel's, a satisfied look on his sunglassed face. "I sell whatever the f**k I want,“ reads the caption.That meme is a pretty good metaphor for the era of radical change through which we are living, an era Azeem Azhar calls "the exponential age." Breakneck advances in technology allowed a humble bookseller to become chieftain of the world's largest online retailer. And don't expect those technological advances to slow down anytime soon. In the next few decades, new developments in everything from AI and 3D printing to synthetic biology and gene-editing won't just change the way we live: they'll allow already monolithic companies to keep growing at an unprecedented pace while our elected leaders scramble to keep up.The gap between rapidly advancing technology and our slow-moving society is the subject of Azeem's marvelous new book, “The Exponential Age: How Accelerating Technology is Transforming Business, Politics and Society.” Recently named one of the best books of the year by the Financial Times, it's at once a rousing survey of the new technologies that may change the way we live and, at the same time, a pointed reminder that those transformations will have profound political, economic, and social consequences.Check out Azeem's newsletter: https://www.exponentialview.co/Join The Next Big Idea Club today at nextbigideaclub.com/podcast and get a free copy of Adam Grant's new book!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Next Big Idea
NEW POWER: How to Spread Ideas, Build Movements, and Leap Ahead

The Next Big Idea

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 11, 2021 41:55


Colleges, businesses, and bureaucracies have long operated on an "old power" model — rigid hierarchies that rule from the top down. But Henry Timms says that paradigm is going extinct. In his book, "New Power: How Power Works in Our Hyperconnected World — and How to Make It Work for You," Timms argues there's another force emerging. It's transparent, collaborative — and it's going to embolden all of us to change the world from the bottom up. Learn more about Giving Tuesday at https://www.givingtuesday.org/ Join The Next Big Idea Club today at nextbigideaclub.com/podcast and get a free copy of Adam Grant's new book! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

10% Happier with Dan Harris
392: How to Fight Languishing (at Work and Everywhere Else) | Adam Grant

10% Happier with Dan Harris

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 1, 2021 69:04


This episode officially marks the launch of the Work Life Series, a brand-new, five-part series that's all about how to live better lives at work. In each episode, we'll be hosting meditation teachers, thought leaders, and top-of-their-field scientists to explore how to better connect with coworkers, boost our on-the-job resilience, and bring mindfulness to our work. And to help you put into action what you learn here on the show, you can join our free Work Life Challenge: a new meditation challenge specifically designed to help you navigate your life at work, available exclusively in the Ten Percent Happier app. Download the app here or wherever you get your apps to join the Work Life Challenge for free. To kick things off in the Work Life Series, we've got a longtime TPH fan favorite: Adam Grant. Adam is an organizational psychologist at The Wharton School and the #1 New York Times bestselling author of multiple books, including his most recent, Think Again. He is also the host of a hit podcast from TED called WorkLife. In this episode, Adam will talk about languishing, some of his ideas for what to do about it, why and how to rethink flexibility at work, and much more.Please note: There are brief references to alcohol & substance abuse and multiple references to anxiety and depression in this episode.Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/adam-grant-392See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.