Bloody Mary Quilt Society

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A dentist and psychologist in rural Appalachia telling stories over their favorite drink. The stories routinely challenge listeners to reflect on ways culture, socialization, and traditions have shaped our lives and the key roles they will play in our fut

Dr. Kristi Williams Dumas & Dr. Melissa J. Keaton


    • Oct 14, 2023 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 31m AVG DURATION
    • 92 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Bloody Mary Quilt Society

    Welcome Back!

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 14, 2023 33:06


    After a bit of a break, the Ladies of the Society are back talking about all things Vegas. Dr. Dumas shares a hysterical story about a Vegas trip that goes up in smokes. Welcome back Y'all!

    Back to School, Photos, and the Black Chola

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 29, 2023 34:14


    The hosts discuss back to school time and the adjustments inherent in the event. Dr. Dumas shares a hilarious story about a Picture Day makeover that happens in the junior high bathroom. The transformation was classic and admired by most EXCLUDING her mother. 

    The Hair Scare-Black Folks Hair 101

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 13, 2023 25:59


    Dr. Dumas dives into the Black hair care industry around spending and recent trends. She gives a cultural perspective into the significance of hair styling and recounts a tragic story about a salon trip gone terribly wrong. This hilarious episode will make your hair stand on end. Download it today!  

    Barbie, Bets, and Head Gaskets

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 3, 2023 30:05


    Dr. Keaton gives her critique of the Barbie movie that hit theaters last weekend. Both hosts discuss the importance of the themes in the movie, the hilarity of their children, and being respected as women. This episode is filled with emotion and laughter. Download it today!

    The Great Aunt Lodie

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 28, 2023 30:19


    Dr. Dumas shares childhood memories of visiting her Aunt Loretta who turns out to be the kindest, most giving, and instigating aunt of all times. The hosts laugh about the instances when Auntie Loretta relished in Dr. Dumas' spankings and failed dish washing attempts. The star of the Blonde Biscuits episode strikes again! Get ready to laugh at Kristi's pain.

    Hustle and Motivate

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 19, 2023 30:29


    Both hosts admit to having felt unmotivated as of late. They discuss and process emotions in real time. This unusual episode is sure to cause one to self-reflect and be inspired.

    Tha Roof Tha Roof Tha Roof is On Fire

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 11, 2023 28:28


    Dr. Dumas talks about her love of holidays and the mishaps that have come along with! It's getting hot in here. 

    Rim Job

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 6, 2023 30:43


    Enjoy the fireworks that go off when UV uses the term rim job in context. You're welcome.

    I Hate a Thief

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 26, 2023 29:59


    This episode deals with irony and the karma of laughing at someone else's woes. Dr. Dumas discusses her seeming seasonal affective disorder and ways that she prepped for summer in order to make an emotional pivot. The plan to get outside and enjoy nature, to include gardening, was executed. The hosts discuss kayaking, Fridays off, and the thieving hillbilly culprit who stole the first harvest of the season. 

    Foolishness & Frog Giggin'

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2023 27:22


    Dr. Keaton discloses that she has mini obsessions that last for months or years at a time. She talks extensively about her current obsession with nature and being outside. Dr. Keaton also reminisces about days of frog giggin' with her father and how tasty fried frog legs are.  The hosts talk about her search for giggin' supplies and kayaks. Either bring your barf bag or hot sauce and download this episode today.

    Mayhem & Mojitos

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 12, 2023 35:13


    Dr. Dumas tells the most horrific travel story ever about her recent trip to Cuba with Dark Gable. The hosts discuss the top 10 packing tips and reasons why a number 11 is crucial to easy airport security passage and avoidance of detainment an hour prior to departure. Grab your barf bag and get ready for takeoff. 

    Wrong Turn Fishin'

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 5, 2023 34:14


    The hosts share highlights of their long-awaited fishing excursion. The description of the sights and sounds are hilarious on their own, but the escapade that occurs after the fact is even more enticing. The hosts discuss research about rushing and ways that being in a hurry can make a fishing trip end in Confederate flags and terror.  If you're brave, download this episode today.

    Keep the Motor Runnin'

    Play Episode Listen Later May 29, 2023 28:31


    Dr. Dumas shares that she will join the millions of other Memorial Day Travelers this weekend.  The hosts discuss which planner packer category they fall in. Dr. Dumas recounts a hilarious story of Dark Gable and his last-minute shenanigans that nearly ruined a huge family trip. Load your suitcases in the car and download this episode today!

    Rule Of 12- Break It

    Play Episode Listen Later May 22, 2023 38:01


    Dr. Dumas shares highlights of a recent professional development workshop that caused her inner turmoil. Listen as she unpacks some of the nuggets and bombshells from the presentation. This episode will either cause you to conform or be a rule breaker. Download this episode today. 

    Banana Roller Coaster

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2023 29:35


    Dr. Keaton shares her desire to get a late life tattoo. The hosts discuss the research and best practices with making such a commitment at this stage in the game. Smoke Show has made a promise to his eldest child that if not kept, could result in an unfortunate inked situation. Download this gem of an episode today!

    Miracles, Signs, and Wonders

    Play Episode Listen Later May 8, 2023 43:37


    The hosts discuss coincidences and whether all things happen for a reason. Dr. Dumas shares research and gives testament to her own experiences during a recent trip to California. Download this episode today and decide whether you are a believer.   

    No Targets- The UV Update

    Play Episode Listen Later May 4, 2023 39:19


    The hosts discuss ways that trauma can negatively affect children into adulthood. By popular demand, a full update on UV is given and Dr. Dumas talks about next steps with Dr. Keaton. 

    Orangutans Wigs & Sunday School

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2023 38:18


    The hosts talk about all things wigs, extensions, and toupees. Dr. Dumas talks about her love of fake hair. She explains the need for her Zoom wig and recounts a story of her mother's first weave install. The laughing that occurs during this episode is infectious. Download the episode today! 

    Cycle of Violence

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 18, 2023 36:50


    The hosts take a break from their light-hearted banter to discuss violent behavior in children. Dr. Keaton shares that UV was recently assaulted. The incident is recounted, research on the subject reviewed, and warning signs shared. UV makes an appearance during this episode, and it is a treat indeed. Download this episode today!

    You Small Man

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 10, 2023 33:46


    Dr. Keaton gives details about courtship with her husband. She shares her recipe for a healthy relationship to include their unusually romantic gift-giving. This episode is full of juicy nuggets of information you'll likely never use. Download it today!

    Pizza & Gutter Rats

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 3, 2023 34:54


    Dr. Dumas recalls courting her husband while he lived in New York.  She discusses places and things about the city she loves and those she despises. Both hosts laugh about her time on Canal Street and instances she thought she would have to run for her life. Download this funny episode today!

    Underachieving Excellence

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2023 31:01


    Dr. Keaton talks about the contrast between she and her children when it comes to academic achievement and motivation. Both hosts share their disdain for algebra and recount the zero times that they've used it since junior high and high school. Dr. Keaton tells the hilarious story of her father's fateful brush with calculus. Download this equation of an episode today! 

    Don't Put Me in the Box

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2023 31:29


    Dr. Dumas talks about her long bout with claustrophobia. The ways this anxiety disorder has affected her throughout the course of her life is the premise for her unalive wishes. As she reflects on her life, she realizes that she has uncannily dated her share of morticians. Hearing her recount dates with these individuals is quite hilarious. Dr. Dumas also gives one of the funniest episode updates ever. Be prepared to laugh and download this episode immediately. 

    Sperm Rods & Mullets

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 13, 2023 31:31


    Do all children attempt to cleverly get away with using bad language or saying naughty things? The hosts certainly believe that they do. Dr. Keaton shares a series of instances where her children attempt to get away with some unmentionables. Both hosts discuss the research that correlates cussing and IQ. You're probably so much smarting than you think. This hilarious episode is one you don't want to miss. 

    Vernal Equinox Easter Bunny

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 6, 2023 31:25


    Dr, Dumas recounts the precious memories of Easters past, to include her yearly crying bouts around the family Easter Egg Hunt.  The hosts share laughs about the Easter Egg Hunt that took place a couple years ago where children were knocked down and lightly trampled. They share their excitement about the prospect of an adult hunt this year. Grab your Easter bonnet and download this episode today. 

    Vince Moreno from Reno

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 27, 2023 31:00


    The hosts discuss the exorbitant amount of money that is spent on weddings. The research reveals a wedding spending chart that has both hosts a gasp!  Dr. Keaton shares details of her most fruitful and enjoyable wedding to date. Bring your rice to throw (we know rice is no longer PC) and download this hilarious episode today.

    Struggle Bus & Puberty

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 20, 2023 30:17


    A pair of very sick hosts struggle through this episode. They discuss puberty, pubic hairs, and Ultra Swoll's first Valentine. There's a new app going around, and Dr. Dumas wants in. Put your masks on and download this episode today!

    Phantom Parent Sleepover

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2023 29:47


    Dr. Keaton tells a hilarious story of parenting gone wrong. Dr. Dumas repeatedly threatens in jest to call "the people" for the parenting faux pas, all of which will have you in stitches.  Follow us for more parenting tips....or not. Download this episode today. 

    Balling Bearded Boys

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 6, 2023 33:42


    The story of David and Goliath has nothing on the tale of Ultra Swoll vs. the Men of Mont Calm. Dr. Dumas recounts the fateful game between the two teams that left folks in the stands shocked and bewildered. Grab your favorite game day snack and download this episode today!

    Rainbow Feet

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 30, 2023 31:57


    Dr. Keaton talks about how parents become a little less vigilant with the care of their children over time, particularly when there are multiple kids in the household. She also shares how a seemingly small tumble results in rainbow feet. This episode proves what a trooper UV is and how hilarious parenting faux pas can be. Download this episode today!

    Amateur Hoarder-Maximilist Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 23, 2023 33:30


    Dr. Keaton discusses the minimalist vs. maximalist continuum she lives her life on with her husband. She talks about ways that she and Smoke Show complement each other and life adjustments that have been made by both of them.  Dr. Keaton recounts pregnancy with a minimalist and times that she flatly had to put her foot down and request more. Plenty of laughs in this episode! 

    African Bambaataa & Bathroom Breaks

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2023 33:15


    Dr. Dumas shares a couple of highlights from her recent trip to Africa. The hosts make contrasts and comparisons to life in the States. Dr. Dumas discusses the fact that there are no traffic rules and getting around the city was quite the adventure. Soak up some of this culture and download this hilarious episode today! 

    Squirrel Dumplins' & Gravy

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 9, 2023 35:40


    Dr. Keaton shares fond memories of time spent with her dad.  She discusses middle child syndrome and her fall from hunting grace. Dr. Keaton also discloses the most sadistic and concerning performance of her life. This hair-raising episode is like a page out of the Silence of the Lambs. Download it if you dare!

    One Year Anniversary Episode: A Look Back

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 2, 2023 33:19


    Bloody Mary Quilt Society celebrates the one-year anniversary of the show's existence. The hosts take a look back and highlight their favorite episodes.  Reminiscing and laughing is surely medicine for the soul. Download this history making episode today!

    Scheduled Spankings

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 26, 2022 32:13


    Dr. Dumas shares the five things she knew would routinely happen on any given Sunday morning as a child. The hosts discuss the research on the debate regarding small children attending and being part of the adult worship experience. This episode is full of laughs and good cheer. Download this episode today! Oh, and Merry Christmas from BMQS.

    Mullet Madness

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 19, 2022 31:01


    Dr. Keaton discusses fashion and hair trends that she never thought would come back around until a recent phenomenon hit her house. Lots of laughs in this episode. In fact, it's hair raising. Download today! 

    Wrasslin' In the Stands

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 12, 2022 32:47


    In Appalachia we don't say wrestling, we say wrasslin'. Dr. Dumas shares research about parents behaving badly at sporting events and tells the real version of the shenanigans that happened at Ultra Swoll's basketball game that had the whole town talking. Strap on your protective gear and download this episode today.

    The Other Black Family

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 5, 2022 30:52


    Dr. Keaton shares stories of her youngest daughter and her challenges adjusting to being part of a blended family.  Apparently, the family is not quite blended enough and she uses her big imagination to remedy the problem.  Take out the family photo album and download this episode today.

    Chitterlings In Heaven

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 28, 2022 31:20


    Dr. Dumas tells another funeral story and shares research about acceptable items to bury with the departed. You will be hard-pressed to find the item she saw in the casket at this fateful funeral on the research list. Grab your hot sauce and download this episode today!

    dumas chitterlings
    Broke Back Mountain Cat

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 21, 2022 31:17


    Dr. Keaton shares a story of heroism gone wrong when her family steps up to save a cat. It's a tail of good intentions with a twisted ending and fat vet bill. Get the kitty litter and download this episode today!

    Blonde Biscuits

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 14, 2022 29:55


    Dr. Dumas talks about fond memories of Thanksgiving. Both hosts compare traditional dishes served on the holiday and continue the discussion of dressing vs. stuffing. Dr. Dumas shares a story about biscuit making that is one for the ages.  Grab the CANberry sauce and download this episode today!

    This Is for the Birds!

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 7, 2022 31:03


    Dr. Dumas tells the story about why she became a pescatarian.  She recounts the fateful class working with her most feared species and what she calls one of the most traumatizing periods of her life.  Download this episode today!

    The Wrong Equation-Algebra Sucks

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 31, 2022 30:55


    Dr. Keaton talks about the rough transition from high school to college and the rude awakening in her algebra class. She recounts a conversation with her father that eased her pain and helped get her through the semester. You'll be inspired. Download this episode today!

    Smelly Cat

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 24, 2022 29:52


    Dr. Dumas shares the story of a truth or dare game between she and her cousin that spanned years of time. The outlandish dares should have embarrassment both players, but clearly did not. This is yet another episode where the giggles get going and the hosts can't stop. This hilarious episode is a must listen.

    dumas smelly cat
    Unsports Mom

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 17, 2022 29:17


    Dr. Keaton tells the story of the unexpected tournament win that caused her real family plans to get put on hold. Both hosts point out differences in their sports histories and interests.  Plenty of laughs in this episode. Put on your favorite fan gear and download today! 

    When Bullets Fly

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 10, 2022 32:40


    The hosts rehash a recent active shooter situation at a local festival. Dr. Dumas takes issue with FEMA's Active Shooter Worksheet that lists the Do's and Don'ts of a real time incident. She also tells a story about an active shooter situation she was in years ago that had a humorous and safe ending. Strap on your bullet proof vest and download this episode today.

    strap fema dumas bullets fly
    No Squiggles

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 3, 2022 30:17


    Dr. Keaton educates her cohost and listeners about a cherished family pastime, jeepin'.  She recounts a specific off roading adventure gone very wrong. It was a squiggle on the map that turns into a hair-raising caper. Buckle your seatbelts and download this episode today. 

    buckle squiggles
    Kousa Berry Quite Contrary

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 26, 2022 30:13


    Dr. Dumas shares one of her favorite activities that is as Appalachian as it gets...canning. She talks about her love of preserving food and making delicious things for her family to enjoy, particularly during the winter months. She also talks about the fateful night she attempted to teach Dr. Keaton to can and how the lesson went to hell in a handbasket full of mason jars very quickly. Pour yourself some shine and download this episode today!

    appalachian dumas quite contrary
    Stop the Stigma

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 19, 2022 31:34


    Dr. Dumas recounts an incident that occurred a week ago, of all places, in the Sprint store. The hosts take a deep dive into the opioid epidemic and ways that is has affected their lives, work, and the community. While this episode is a break from their lighthearted banter, the hosts believe this episode is both transformative and needed. Let's break the stigma. It's okay to not be okay. Download this episode today.

    Bears Poop in the Woods

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 12, 2022 31:20


    Dr. Keaton talks about the cultural nuances of being a transplant in Appalachia. The hosts laugh heartily about Smoke Show's encounters with the locals while exercising in totally obscure places. Dr. Dumas shares the account of Dark Gable's first winter in the mountains and the natives that helped him out of a ditch. Grab your toilet paper and download this episode today!

    Sprint, T-Mobile, and the Battle to Not Lose My Mind

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 5, 2022 32:33


    Dr. Dumas shares the ongoing quandary with her cell phone carrier (Sprint) and their new merger with T-Mobile. She also recounts a failed attempt to keep her composure during her most recent store visit. Both hosts discuss the cost of staying in the trenches with the service provider until the predicted comeback. Weigh in on this national dilemma. Download this hilarious episode without delay.

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