Who Cares? …about Ross & Patrick

This is our first episode back in quite a long time! Our podcast is called "We Hired a Sitter For This" now. One day I will figure out how to change the name of the show and the art, etc, but for now, enjoy our first episode back.

Hello and welcome to Topic Town, population two!! On this, our one hundred and twelfth episode- we decide to discuss a specific topic and this first one is spicy. We both tell the stories of how we lost our virginity. So saddle up and get on the T train, you're headed to pound town! Enjoy this mushroom trip about mushroom tips. Eww this description is gross.

When your kid gets a gnarly case of Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease, there's only one way to get a little comfort: Pretend like it was more painful for you- The Parent. Listen in as we recap what it was like to go to a real life medieval emergency room right here in Brooklyn. We also chat about an even worse trauma: Patrick bombing in grand fashion on the internet. Are you following us on the socials? Please do! Here's our IG info: Podcast: @who.cares.podcast Ross: @rosserinstyles Patrick: @theholbertreport Visit www.patrickholbert.com for upcoming standup shows!

Who cares about anything when world war three is on and poppin?? Who cares about anything when you just had an afternoon romp? Who cares about anything when your toddler is a terrrorist?? Who cares about anything when this could be THE LAST EPISODE OF WHO CARES EVER?? We're saying "could be" because even if it is, that's only because we are probably going to change the name of the podcast. Take a listen to find out what we might change it to! And let us know if it's the best idea you've ever heard in your life. If you think it's a bad idea, piss off. This episode sponsored by iodine anti radiation pills

In a very spooky episode of who cares, Ross and Patrick over share about their own bodies, smooshing their bodies together (very sexy), trying to clean Fran's undercarriage after epic dumps, and so much more! Ross is high on Benadryl after a cortisone shot so who the fuck knows what is going on. Join them on another rocky road filled episode of who cares. Seriously, what the hell are they even talking about?!

This week Ross and Patrick take you on a tour of their current state which is chaotic, sleep deprived, and impassioned. They're all over the the place- from Bachelor in Paradise to calling a local city council member about the trash crisis in Bushwick. Can you keep up with their scatter brained diatribes?? More importantly, all Ross wants to know is, have you watched Succession and do you love Kendall as much as she does? Trust me, you don't. Enjoy!

Hello viewers! Have you missed Ross and Patrick? Well they've missed you. In this episode, they discuss the albatross around all of our necks, CAPITALISM. Hooray! Did you know we've all been brainwashed since childhood to think that we need to be producing at all times and that said production equates to our personal self worth? Don't worry, Ross and Patrick also take you on a gorgeous journey of their long term stay at a hotel in a city that shall remain nameless and the cast of characters who work there. A place where up is down, down is up, pools are hot, and hot tubs are cold. Join them, won't you?

We recorded another hot one in the office space. We went as long as we could before our tits melted off. Listen in as we kvetch about traveling with the child, Patrick's upcoming vasectomy, and "Aunt Book." Send along any terrible memes you want us to tear apart next week. Love u!!

Ross and Patrick care about the well being of the neighborhood and the world so please listen to this important episode as they embark on a new entrepreneurial endeavor that will create global healing

On today's episode, Ross and Patrick discuss vasectomies, doctors who reinforce traumatic patriarchal values, and then seamlessly segue into life's minutia. Serving you classic Who Cares nonsense. Did I mention they're tired all the time? Rate, review, and subscribe if you haven't already. Ross and Patrick need sleep and reviews.

On today’s show, Ross and Patrick delve into life as parents and how different they feel about their own individual bodies- You know... Sexually. Pretty cool, right? Their lives have significantly changed and so have their libidos. Is it going to be a slutty summer for the new Mom and Dad? Tune in to find out how they're handling it all on this new episode of Who Cares!

We hired a sitter to get this one done so dear god please listen. Thanks for keeping us in your subscription queue!! We plan to be back weekly from now on. But we'll let you know next week.

Our 101st episode!! We talk all about the junk we've geared up with to keep a baby alive for nearly 8 months. We complain about internet marketing and the parental industrial complex but we also come through with a big recommendation: If you have a new child who won't sleep, you need to get a mechanical bull.

Can you believe it?!?! They made it to episode 100! It only took 3 years, recording inconsistently, and some major life upheavals but they did it. Ross and Patrick take a walk down memory lane but not without discussing politics and The Bachelor. It wouldn’t be 100 episodes of Who Cares if they didn’t bounce around from topic to topic like they forgot to take their adderall. Viewer, thank you for coming on this journey with Ross and Patrick and here’s to a 100 more! Love you!

We recorded this episode on the morning of January 20, 2021 in the hours before Joe Biden was inaugurated. Patrick is thinking about joining a far right extremist group and he tells Ross all about the cool options out there

Content content content!!! The Bachelorette, Dolly Parton, and MURDER. Here's what we're watching this holiday season. Well, throughout 2020 I guess.

Ross and Patrick have been completely preoccupied by new parenthood and haven’t found a moment to record... until now! They missed you so. Hopefully you don’t mind that “who cares” has become less sexy, and more sleep deprived and child obsessed. They warned you when Ross got pregnant, all bets are off and so are the sex parties, at least for a little while. Join Ross and Patrick on their tour of sleep training a 5 month old baby and what it does to the adult brain. Enjoy!

Uncle Dave AKA Uncle Bubz is back and is here to charm your baby. What is not to love about this man??

The Holbertineaus check in about Patrick's adventures in child rearing by himself

Patrick and Ross get together to talk through childhood anxieties and the current cricks in their necks

They’re at it again! Talking babies, family gatherings in the time of covid, and anniversaries. What kind of anniversaries? You’ll have to listen to find out. They unpack the minutia of daily life with a baby and a dog, while wondering will they be sluts again? They reminisce about past dalliances all the while wondering, “Is Frances hearing this?” Tune in to hear your favorite new parents continue on their journey of oversharing.

Just a couple of new parents trying to think and speak clearly through the fog of sleep deprivation! Come along for a catch up episode as we discuss what it's like being back on our own in Brooklyn. No shade, but if you got to raise your kid in a non-pandemic situation with help from multiple friends and family members.... Good for you!! Wow that must be amazing. Ok never mind, we love u all

Hello Everyone! Sorry for the delay. But we're back with an audio odyssey catching up on where we've been and what's going on. Our daughter was born on June 15th! Pretty crazy to be bringing a life into this world at this particular moment. We are doing the best we can and enjoying it overall. We hope you are all safe and sound and able to find peace and justice in your own life and in your communities. We will do our best to post episodes regularly, but it's proving challenging to multi task with a 6 week old!

Thanks for listening!! We hope you're all doing well during these nutty times. We're hanging in there by listening to En Vogue and Janet Jackson.

Hello gang, we missed you! But we are back to check in. Ross is very pregnant. On this episode, for the entire 54 minutes, we discuss various perineal massage techniques that Patrick is reading about in the Penny Simkin classic, The Birth Partner. Follow us on instagram for video demonstrations!! @who.cares.podcast

We finally jump on the mics to check in with ya'll!! So sorry for the delay but the world has been postponed and also Ross was busy keeping this family afloat while Patrick wasn't feeling well. On this episode we talk about all the trash content we've been consuming to pass the time without going insane and we also discuss the future of our extracurricular relationships. Oh and there are crystals involved. Instagram: @who.cares.podcast  

If you missed our instagram Live episode from Thursday, March 26th, here's the audio from it! We hope you're all doing great. Enjoy!

Well shit is really really fucking weird right now, huh? No one knows anything about what the next several months will be like, but that doesn’t mean Ross and Patrick can’t answer some questions for you. They’ve got solicited advice for the folks who wrote in. They hope this episode will keep you entertained and maybe even a little informed while you pull yourself away from the news long enough to cry on the toilet.

This is a very special episode! Ross and Patrick check in for a few minutes to start the show and then we go to a hotel in the middle of Pennsylvania to listen in as Patrick tries to learn how to be a dad from his comedy pal Glen Tickle. Glen has two daughters, a wife, a comedy album called "(Yes, Really)," and a brand new special called "Good Grief: A Comedy About Loss and Being Bad At It." He's an all around great guy and a hilarious comic. Check him out at www.glentickle.com. Buy his new special there for download!!

Money, money, money, mooonnneeeyyy. Moooonnneeeyyy! Ya know, like the song. Ross and Patrick coming to you post couple’s business meeting so they needed to unpack said business immediately. Not as fun as sex but equally as uncomfortable to talk about. Sounds fun, right?

Have you heard the news? Pod people are getting engaged without actually meeting face to face! They are potentially mating and procreating while in the pods with the assistance of new technology that involves a blue tooth speaker, a ukulele, and goblets of wine. The apocalypse is a upon us and we must act fast. Just kidding! Love Is Blind is a new dating show on Netflix and Ross and Patrick are obsessed. The show is probably contributing to the downfall of society but who cares?! Listen to Ross and Patrick spoil the entire show by unpacking and ridiculing everything about it.

Ross & Patrick had exactly an hour to hang out together this weekend so they recorded this podcast to tell you all about wackin' off together in Puerto Rico. Happy President's Day!

Well they’re back from the tropics and they’re depressed. However, it felt like Christmas morning on Sunday in Brooklyn because after a week apart, they finally reunited with PEGGY! So all is not lost - least not in the Holbertineau house - but the nation is a full blown nightmare. While on their magical vacation in Puerto Rico, Ross and Patrick still kept tabs on the White House of Horrors and the democratic shim sham, and most importantly The Bachelor. Tune in to hear all about the food, the beach, the relaxation, and the tv watching. They missed you!

This episode is all about the Super Bowl and sports! JK, only a little bit. We love you, thanks for listening, we'll be back next week after vacation!!

Perhaps our most taboo topic yet!

This week Ross and Patrick are back to bouncing around from topic to topic. They know you missed that. While they prepare to be parents, they’re willing to dish out all the unsolicited relationship advice you didn’t ask for. Ross is reading about how to be a French parent, while Patrick wants to be the next bachelor. Come along for the bumpy ride all to the tune of the Backstreet Boys. It makes sense if you listen so just do it. For Patrick's comedy dates, go to https://www.patrickholbert.com/#shows-section Follow us on Instagram @who.cares.podcast, @rosserinstyles, @theholbertreport

A day late and several dollars short, happy 2020 everybody! We hope all your New Year dreams come true. On this episode we recap a week of revelry in the great state of Maine. It's a silly one- Patrick now does manual labor for work and Ross was kind enough to listen to his self pity for an hour. Enjoy!!

Here's a little short and sweet episode for you guys! Patrick and Ross just got home from P's big show and wanted to do some processing. So much gratitude and appreciation and thankfully not as much second guessing as usual. The pair also chat about the incoming New Year and the outgoing 2019 through the eyes of Barack Obama. Enjoy and thanks for all the listens over the past year!!

Hey y’all! Happy holidays! Ross and Patrick check in and tell you their travel plans for Christmas week even though you didn’t ask. Don’t forget they’re so grateful for you.

This week Ross and Patrick talk about sex, love, parenthood, and of course, Peggy. They’ve got some news and they’re ready to over share. Get into it!

Ross, Patrick, and Peggy joined chosen family Eddie and Gregory in Boiceville, NY for the weekend. With a stocked fridge, they tucked themselves away in a cabin surrounded by snow. Patrick and Gregory puzzled while Ross and Eddie definitely did not puzzle. Be teleported away while Ross and Patrick recount their weekend of rest, relaxation, overeating, and Peggy pissing everywhere.

This week is a short one. We're stuffed full of turkey but wanted to drop a quick little episode to express our gratitude for all our listeners! Ya'll are the best and we will be back next week with a proper show. Have a great week and enjoy those leftovers!!

Episode 69, ya pervs!! Coming to you from the comforts of their couch again, Ross and Patrick discuss politics and how every republican supporter of Trump really wants to be Scrooge McDuck. Peggy canoodles them through their attempt at political discourse while working on her own tv show, “Everything is Food!” What a dynamic family!

Just a fun catch-up ramble sesh!! Enjoy xoxoxo

Pregnancy, sonograms, Whitesnake, oh my! What do these things have in common? Absolutely nothing of course. Somehow Patrick and Ross end up talking about 80's hair metal after they’ve subjected you to the literal ins and outs of their first OBGYN appointment. Friends, the fever dream continues. Don’t you want to see how it all plays out?

Luxe is a sex positive, body positive, burlesque performing witch who also happens to run a creative arts program for children. She is a radical lady who’s ready to dish all things taboo. This self-described heathen also happens to be Ross and Patrick’s friend, neighbor, and dear aunt to Peggy. She does it all! Let the sex magic commence!

It’s been two weeks since you’ve heard from Ross and Patrick and they’ve missed you terribly. Don’t worry- everything is ok. They just went on vacation aaaaaannnnndddd got some major life news. So they put a pin in it and now they’re back to overshare and answer all the questions you never asked.

Even though Kelly, Ross, and Patrick have known each other for over a decade, this was definitely the most time they've ever spent together. Prior to recording this episode, Kelly put Peggy through two hours of her dog training paces. She's the dog whisperer of Ross and Patrick’s dreams and is helping them turn their little Peggy right around. Goddess bless this woman. We swear she was not held hostage. Join us while she shares about career changes, trusting your gut, taking risks, and being a big ol’ dog nerd. They couldn’t have been happier to talk to this epic canine empath. Check out her incredible dog walking, training, and boarding business Hustle Pups NYC at www.hustlepupsnyc.com.

Enjoy this week's episode!