Extremely Pale and Incredibly Loud

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A waggish collaboration between two young women who look ill and love to hear themselves talk.

Tia Christoffersen & Samantha Purchase


    • May 21, 2019 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 40m AVG DURATION
    • 71 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Extremely Pale and Incredibly Loud

    Ep 71-Uncooked Spaghetti

    Play Episode Listen Later May 21, 2019 72:33


    Sam and Tia return from yet another hiatus to bring you joy with nonsensical ramblings, thoughts on the Game of Thrones finale, and another instalment of Bad Lyrics. What are your thoughts on La Croix? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 70-Ginger Vitis

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 27, 2019 20:06


    Sam and Tia return from their brief hiatus to talk about peeing in pools, Sam's birthday, and dolphin-assisted-births. What's your star sign? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 69-Eye Goo

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 13, 2019 53:55


    Sam and Tia do a deep dive into the palpable chemistry between Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper, share their unconventional Oscar predictions, and discuss medical examiner Judy Melinek's book and the movie Velvet Buzzsaw. Tell us your biggest fears. extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 68-Let's Call Him Danger

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 5, 2019 52:21


    Cake Maker Sarah is back to tell yet another haunting tale from her past! Plus, Sam and Tia tell what is possibly a ghost story, and Logan makes a surprise entrance to talk about his encounter with a pro wrestler. Send us your stories! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 67-Museum of a Man

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 29, 2019 64:55


    Cake Maker Sarah has returned! She joins Sam and Tia to talk about the Fyre Festival documentary and to tell a chilling tale from middle school. Sam confesses her love for Alex Trebek, and Tia reads a piece of hate mail that hits very close to home. Plus, don't miss another instalment of their bad lyrics segment! Please, please give us compliments: extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 66-Sisters of Perpetual Anger

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 24, 2019 36:52


    Join your EPIL co-hosts on a foray into badly written television, discombobulated locomotives, and reflections on teendom. Validate us: extremelypalepod@gmail.com @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 65-Layered Necklaces: The Sign of a Cult

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 15, 2019 32:32


    Happy (belated) New Year from the ladies of Extremely Pale and Incredibly Loud! Tune in to this episode to hear Sam and Tia's resolutions and reviews of popular TV shows and movies, including You and Bandersnatch. Plus, don't miss an impassioned chat about Riverdale. Tell us your thoughts about cult-like jewelry: extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 64-Something About a Rhombus

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 8, 2019 64:01


    This week, Sam and Tia finally bring you tales of their trip to Seattle! Tune in to hear about a near-death experience, spooky tunnels, and pizza from strangers. Send us your stories! We love to hear about anything from airport security encounters to winding up in maze-like basements. extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 63-Spider Nausea

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 2, 2018 24:38


    Sam and Tia bring you a special episode with tales of snowstorms and arachnophobia. How do you feel about spiders? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 62-The Open Secret of the Ooze

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 25, 2018 32:52


    It's Sam and Tia's first episode on the go! Join them on a journey to the doctor's office to learn the secret of the ooze. Now accepting life advice: extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 61-The Oven Saga

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 28, 2018 33:42


    This episode is a real doozie. It's filled with tales of emergencies and features the return of Robot Logan! Tell us about your appliances. extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 60-Feed a Cold, Starve a Broken Leg

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 31, 2018 26:13


    Happy 60th episode! Logan is back to argue with Sam about aliens and share an unfortunate story about puke. When was the last time you washed your jeans? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 59-Killed by the Rhythm

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 25, 2018 41:26


    This week, Sam and Tia have special guest Logan on to talk about dance-a-thons and mixed martial arts. What are your thoughts on dirt & worms? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 58-Toe Hair

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 5, 2018 61:27


    Welcome to the episode with pep! Sam and Tia dive into the second season of Riverdale and they have a looot of opinions. What show should we review next? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 57-There's No Excuse, I Was Medicated

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2018 37:16


    This week, Kristina joins the ladies for a round of Dumb Lyrics, and shares the story of how she and Sam met.

    Ep 56-Roy Orbison Knows the Truth

    Play Episode Listen Later May 9, 2018 37:22


    This week, Sam and Tia are joined by surprise guest Kristina! Sam reads celebrity conspiracy theories, then Tia and Kristina see if they can guess who the theories are about. It's a wild ride from start to finish. What's your fave conspiracy theory? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 55-Just Huff Some Bleach

    Play Episode Listen Later May 2, 2018 55:35


    They're back! In the new studio, Sam and Tia reminisce about Sam's birthday, talk about the most horrific looking crustacean, and analyze some questionable lyrics. Do you have arachnophobia? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 54-Swaddling Issues-Valentine's Special Part 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 27, 2018 40:07


    In part two of our Valentine's Special, the ladies rant about oversharers, discuss anthropomorphic sex toys, and Chelsea shares stories of online dating. Tell us your dating horror stories! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 53-Cabbage Hands-Valentine's Special Part 1

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 13, 2018 40:44


    In this special Valentine's two-parter, Chelsea joins the ladies to talk about nipple tattoos, bestiality, and Tia and Sam's tumultuous texting relationship. Tell us about your Valentine's Day! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 52-Foot Funeral

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 1, 2018 25:15


    Ahoy! This week, Tia and Sam discuss the notion that whales are not people and talk about the world's scariest child. Plus, Sam takes the psychopath test on air! Are you a psychopath? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 51-Germ Hole

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 24, 2018 31:49


    This week, Tia and Sam catch up on fan mail (which gets Sam pretty riled up) and review some less-than-savoury clothing items. Plus, listen to the ladies' brand new theme song! Watch the nasty toad video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SgROaJY6Xnk Have you ever been chased by a chicken? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 50-Is This a Real Song?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2018 18:36


    To mark fifty episodes of Extremely Pale and Incredibly Loud comes this special episode from the archives! Tia reads some spectacularly bad song lyrics to Sam, who guesses the artist responsible for their existence. Have any bad lyric recommendations? Tell us immediately! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 49-You Need to Get a Hot Doctor

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 10, 2018 44:22


    The ladies are back from their hiatus! Their triumphant return will bless your ears with impromptu harmonizing and New Year's Resolutions. Tell us your 2018 goals, people! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 48-Chuck My Body in the Dirt

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 7, 2017 19:12


    This week, the Extremely Pale ladies talk about Lady Gaga's documentary (nudity included) and Sam imitates Tony Hawk. Tell us about yourself. extremelypalepod@gmail.com @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 47-Pizza Parker

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 3, 2017 29:55


    They're baaack! In this week's episode, the ladies discuss a very important meme and reflect on their Halloweens. What was your Halloween costume? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 46-For the Right Price I'll Eat Anything

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 10, 2017 24:24


    This week on EPIL, Sam answers spooky questions, Tia talks about her October bath regimen, and the ladies read a frightening fanmail. What is your favourite horror movie? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 45-A Soulpatch for Your Scalp

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 3, 2017 32:41


    It's the return of Spook Month! Sam talks about the chilling movie, My Friend Dahmer, and Tia shares a spine-tingling ghost story. Tell us your scary stories! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 44-She Went Full Frodo

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 26, 2017 22:54


    This week, Sam and Tia read many an email and discuss the hot new horror movie, "It." Check out the new artwork by Callie Smith! Email us at extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 43-Shaking the Dismembered Hand

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 19, 2017 38:34


    The ladies are back from their summer hiatus and, this week, Tia talks about strange rich men in Arizona, and Sam marvels at the word ‘twoonie.' Let us know: is it spelled twoonie or toonie? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 42-My Knees Are Too Big to Fit Under the Table

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 8, 2017 56:19


    Sam and Tia talk to the talented and not at all moth-like Callie about animation, Childish Gambino, and confederate antique dealers. Do you know how allergy injections work? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 41-Fleur De Listen

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2017 11:51


    This week, Tia reads Sam's Montreal's adventures in an action packed mini episode! Send us your travel logs! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 40-You Have an Outstanding Body . . . of Work

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 25, 2017 24:14


    Rule number one: never touch Sam's feet. Especially not with your feet. Rule number two: proofread your Amazon reviews. Do you know what galvanized means? extremelypalepod@gmail.com @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 39-My Medical Romance

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 18, 2017 30:35


    Your palest co-hosts are back for another episode to discuss pizza pop accidents and more passionate product reviews. Have you ever been burned by hot cheese? extremelypalepod@gmail.com @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 38-Do Y'all Even Know Who Enya Is?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 11, 2017 43:13


    Saddle up people, it's another episode of Extremely Pale and Incredibly Loud! This week, the ladies indulge in some Harry Styles appreciation and recall a few of Sam's dance-related injuries. Do you still own a DVD player? extremelypalepod@gmail.com @xtremelypalepod @sampantha_90 @tchristo_

    Ep 37-Boreal Aurorealis

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 4, 2017 43:09


    This week, Sam reads a nostalgic Yahoo user's review of grapes and the ladies discuss scientology. You won't want to miss Sam's impression of Tom Cruise's interview laugh. Talk to us, people! extremelypalepod@gmail.com @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 36-Maybe You Need Compression Socks

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 28, 2017 27:35


    Holla! This week, Tia reads strangers' sex toy reviews and Sam becomes very concerned with the wellbeing of an Amazon user. Send us a review about your performance wear: extremelypalepod@gmail.com Instagram: @xtremelypalepod Twitter: @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 35-You Want to Smell His Bouquet?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2017 31:27


    Sit up straight, 'cause it's a brand new episode of Extremely Pale and Incredibly Loud! Listen to Sam question Tia's scientific education and confess she has a Goodreads account. This episode is dedicated to Kingpin Lane! Send us a scathing review: extremelypalepod@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter and Instagram: @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 34-Why Did You Go To Humpty's in the First Place?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2017 26:53


    Welcome to another week of bliss with Sam and Tia! The ladies bring you lots of TV talk and read some delicious fan mail. Watch the infamous Tommy Wiseau videos: https://youtu.be/dXlao2KNYjQ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BD-YZbeajeY&t=15s

    Ep 33-Our Feet are Photogenic

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 6, 2017 48:23


    We're baaack! This week, Sam talks about Twin Peaks and evil concertgoers and Tia brings the heat in the return of the Bad Lyrics segment. FOLLOW OUR NEW INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT @xtremelypalepod

    Ep 32-Can You Do Whippets Out of an Axe Can?

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2017 49:36


    Huzzah! Cake Maker Sarah is back and better than ever. She tells Sam and Tia about her pubescent little brother, relives her eventful birthday celebration and, as always, breaks into song. What is your credit card number? extremelypalepod@gmail.com Twitter: @xtremelypalepod Stay tuned for our new Instagram account!

    Ep 31-Foot Stank is Not Apropos

    Play Episode Listen Later May 9, 2017 44:05


    Make way for this week's special guest, Cake Maker Sarah! The three ladies take on hard hitting topics such as foot stench and vegan bakery customers. Are you gluten free? extremelypalepod@gmail.com @xtremelypalepod @extremelypalepod

    Ep 30-The Light at the End of the Salt Lamp

    Play Episode Listen Later May 2, 2017 38:23


    Tia and Sam pontificate on the mystical benefits of sodium lighting and their favourite televised entertainment. Includes a double email feature from Big Papa himself, Lane. Sam sneezes a-plenty. Let us know the ideal shoe size and feed us salt: extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 29-John Wick is a Loyal Husband

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2017 31:17


    This week, the podcast gets fragrant as Sam and Tia discuss some of their favourite scents. The ladies also discuss Harry Styles' canorous croon, as well as have a brief existential crisis. Vote on our matching haircut: extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 28-Phil Spector is a Rat Muppet

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 18, 2017 36:39


    In this week's episode, the ladies bring you stories of celebrity murderers, and they talk about the world's worst song. Vote on our matching tattoo! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 27-Smell an Essential Oil and Calm Down

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2017 40:31


    Sit back and relax, because Extremely Pale Pod is back at it again! This week, Sam tells Tia about her new obsession, Californication, and the ladies read a hefty pile of fan mail. Plus, Sam and Tia discuss the ominous 27 Club. Tell us we have supple skin: extremelypalepod@gmail.com Twitter @xtremelypalepod IG @extremelypalepod Don't forget to rate and review!

    Ep 26-Only By the Grace of God Did I Swallow That

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2017 40:50


    In this week's episode, Sam and Tia share their favourite experimental films and talk about Tommy Wiseau even more. Compliment our hair: extremelypalepod@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter! @sampantha_90 @tchristo_ Get your Tommy fix: www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nqjsI6Q9kA

    Ep 25-It Hit Me Right in the Tramp Stamp

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2017 55:46


    Happy Golden 25! For Sam and Tia's anniversary, they discuss menstruation, belly buttons, and of course, the X Files. Tell us about your belly button! extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 24-Tommy Wiseau Knows Women

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 15, 2017 39:05


    In this week's episode, Sam has an electric reaction to a birthday gift and Tia delivers a second-rate impression of Tommy Wiseau in his Blockbuster hit, The Room.

    Ep 23-The Smell of My Dying Mother

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 7, 2017 62:27


    This week on Extremely Pale Pod, Sam and Tia talk about Sam's birthday, the Best Picture fiasco, and an especially strange phenomenon: fragrance reviews. Send us a review of your favourite fragrance: extremelypalepod@gmail.com IG: @extremelypalepod Twitter: @xtremelypalepod http://uproxx.com/hitfix/a-complete-history-of-gillian-anderson-and-david-duchovnys-x-files-feud/

    Ep 22-David Duchovny in Jeans

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 21, 2017 35:00


    This week, Sam and Tia dive into some old fan mail and discuss some of Sam's favourite thing. Do you like David Duchovny in jeans? extremelypalepod@gmail.com

    Ep 21-Valentine's Special Part 2-The Spicy Edition

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2017 42:32


    In the second part of this Valentine's Day special, Queen Irina brings the heat for our bad lyrics segment. And she isn't the only one bringing the heat in this episode. Tell us about your Valentine's Day: extremelypalepod@gmail.com

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