First Timers

Welcome Gabi with the good hair! After a best-case-scenario labor and perfect post-partum poop, Angie is largely anxiety free. Max loves on little sis, but is learning not to love on Ayla, who still prefers a "no-touching" policy. Evie enjoys the spotlight at her surprise fifth birthday party. 

*This episode originally aired on 10/20/16. Angie recalls counting the hours between tears and the pretzel that broke the camel’s back, while Julie explains how the monotony of early motherhood made her morose. In happy news, Angie’s stolen stroller miraculously reappears and Julie’s closet ghost proves friendly. Both moms have no clue that something was happening with the audio while recording this episode, so they'd like to apologize for the crackling sound!  If you’re struggling with PPD or PPA, visit PostPartum.net for help!  

*This episode previously aired on 8/3/2017. In this very funny episode, actress, tag keeper and math failure Stephanie Escajeda explains how everything from Chinese astrology to playground research informed her baby making. Also covered in this eclectic episode: juice box benders, supermarket family sagas, carbon footprint consciousness, leap year babies and stealing. Follow Stephanie at @stephescajeda Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. And send us YOUR first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com!

*This episode originally aired on 11/2/17. Comedian Dave Williamson chats about his transformation from one of the five unhandiest men in the country, into a porch building, grout cleaning, barn raising dad/bro. Plus: how to anger a 19th Century lighthouse attendant. * For more on Dave, check out DaveWilliamsonComedy.com * Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher and don't forget to send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

*This episode was previously published on 5/26/17. Angie and Julie record from The Gundo Comedy Festival. Three-year-old Evie goes on a Nordstrom shopping spree, while thirty-something Angie must accept her poorness. Both moms sustain wrist injuries, but only comes away wearing a badge of (dis)honor. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher and send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

*This episode originally aired 5/26/16 and was our VERY FIRST EPISODE EVER! Enjoy getting to know Angie and Julie and hearing about baby Max and barely-a-toddler Evie! Angie feels whore-able because she woke her kid up to go to a party. Julie feels ha-rrible because she legit almost killed hers. Topics also include snack n snooze, hiring a day laborer for your baby to sleep on and coastal eddies.   While we are currently on hiatus, please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! We will be coming back with a bang and hope to have all of your support! And don't forget to send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Sickness follows Angie like death followed the characters in Final Destination. Evie encourages Julie to focus on self care. Max insists Angie focus on deep breathing. When separated, vagina halves will always find one another again. How romantic! All this and more is just a download away!   Please subscribe to our show, share with a friend, and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! And send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

*This episode originally aired in July of 2018. Did you know the key to parkour is yelling “PARKOUR!”? Have you heard the stereotypes about Presbyterians turned Atheists? Did you get “ground” in the 90’s? Guest, mom and sister abuser Shauna explains it all on this hilarious episode. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. 

Julie zip ties diapers while Angie close lines her kid. Why do toddlers need to get ready to get ready? How many days in a row will Ayla scream sweep the floor with her back? All this and more on today's episode. Subscribe to our podcast, share it with friends, and send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimers@gmail.com!

Thanks to needles in her face and crystals in her ears, Angie is back! Evie laments her changing relationship with Max, but is happy that Ayla loves her (slightly more than pizza). Despite not having a firm grasp on personal space, Max is big man on preschool campus.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher and share us with your friends. It really does help, we swear! And don't forget to send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Julie’s husband Dave, who wasn’t a high school golf champ, sits amongst his own clothing and box of 90’s nostalgia to talk sibling squabbles. The couple also covers crafting with cardboard and amygdala injuries. Unless you are Julie’s mom, tune in now! Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! And don't forget to send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Globe trotter and teen wrangler Jill visits to talk hormones, homework and high AF kids. Angie and Julie are thrilled to hear that despite The Year of the Critter and hours-long crying spells, parenting gets easier. Tune in now and help the moms determine whether Jill's daughter has provided real or fake slang!   Find Jill @ wanderingnativecollective.com   Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! And don't forget to send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Angie takes Max to a disgusting pool with unruly kids. He loves it! Julie creates a chore chart. Evie immediately realizes how to exploit the chore chart. Someone shit the big boy bed so the big boy goes back to his crib.  Show these moms some love by listening NOW!   Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

VIP guest and open-concept-one-bedroom owner Molly explains why she's the broken-back Manning of the lactation world. Evie thinks boys are charming. Max shits his crib. Tune in for all this and more, including some hot tips on how to make your baby more flammable.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

*This episode originally aired in June of 2016* The moms talk husband resentment: Julie’s arrived early; Angie’s came on strong. More importantly, will Evie and Max share their mothers’ affection for 90’s music or will they say, “Bye, Felicia!” to Third Eye Blind and The Goo Goo Dolls? Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

After some riveting cough talk, Julie reveals why there's an Ikea bin atop her stroller and Angie wonders why Santa put Max on the naughty list. Children say the darnedest things.The moms wonder if those things are politically incorrect. Tune in for all this and more, including hot gossip on which celebrity hunk tosses cookies and which makes the hosts want to toss their cookies. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Every time Angie coughs during this episode she pees her pants a little. She coughs a lot. Luckily she's wearing a postpartum-sized pad! Angie and Julie plan to "get back at it!" in their 50's. In the meantime, they'll be incontinent queefers. If they form a band--again, in their 50's--maybe that will be the name. Please enjoy this very silly episode! Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Audience members share anecdotes about butt worms, shoe poop and vaginal nigiri. Julie and Angie vow to channel their inner Costco man and tell strangers to back the f#*k up. Or, the moms will pretend their kids have an ultra contagious limb-loss disease. Either way, no one will be forced to hug it out.   Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.  

The moms ponder life's big questions, like whether vomit can be composted and why grandparents can't take a half-decent photo. Julie's IUD has hijacked her libido, rendering the device completely unnecessary. Angie hasn't had her period since # was called a pound sign. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Television host and lifestyle expert Brandi Milloy gets a pap smear and partner from her OB-GYN. Then the tenacious mom produces, directs and stars in her daughter's award-worthy birth story. Missing this episode would be more devastating than missing your wife's mucous plug ... so tune in now!   Check our Brandi's website brandimilloy.com and follow her on social media @brandimilloy!      

While Max is busy being Max, Evie gives The Switch Witch a hard time and Ayla bites the hand that feeds her. As a special bonus, the moms sing—Angie poorly and Julie very, very poorly—their kids' favorite tunes.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

These moms mean business when it comes to Halloween. The fruits of their labor, however, are not always appreciated. All of the kids are gross: Ayla licks bathroom walls, Evie leaves turd on her tush and Max eats candy off of public floors despite buckets of wrapped candy at home.  First Timers Promo Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Angie's having a good hair pregnancy! Julie recalls a sweaty, gestational glow. The moms discuss their kid's efforts to become world-class trouble makers: Evie's involved in a best-friend triangle, while Max is busy being the class jerk. The school yoga routine—while adorable—doesn't seem to be helping either child to recenter.    Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.  

Free-throw champ and verbal-assault ninja Kasey drops by to relive a heated playground throw down. The moms also discuss lice hacks, moron husbands and—the most titillating of all topics—public transportation. This hilarious episode is brought to you by Palm Springs. Download now or earn bad desert juju.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! Share our podcast with your mom friends, dad friends, mom FB group, or just your mom! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Mom, podcaster and producer Melissa Pressman drops by the closet to talk everything twins, from pregnancy to delivery to telling them apart. It all sounds ... hard! How did Aunt Becky and Uncle Jesse get through it without gaining a single wrinkle? Plus, Max is biting.    Check out Melissa's podcast, Rated PG

Rachel Mannino tells the moms what it's like to live with your kid; your stepson; your ex and baby daddy; your boyfriend and baby daddy's friend; and your giant dog. Spoiler: it's not the hell it sounds like! Plus: Angie spreads rumors about Nikki Taylor and Afrin.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Angie prefers raging toddler to crying newborn. Soon she’ll have both! Julie meets and then immediately terrifies a new neighbor. Why didn’t Sam’s man-with-a-broom guardian angel come to her rescue? This episode is very unofficially sponsored by Charles Schulz. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Max lies in poop. Ayla paints in poop. The moms are sick of poop. Evie is sick of soccer. Plus… brain injuries! Don’t miss this week’s heady episode! Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Evie has gone emo and Max ODs on OJ, but more importantly, the moms share listener stories! What constitutes a “big kid”? How many soggy porch diapers are too many? Can a baby contract ebola by bathing in a hotel bathtub? Can a mom contract ebola by using a baby wipe to pick up a dead rodent? Angie and Julie don’t have the answers, but that doesn’t stop them.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Max loves the doctor; Evie loves the doctor's pretzels; everyone loves charcuterie. The moms decide that despite a day one wardrobe malfunction, school is off to a good start. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com

Evie suffers from airplane-onset ADD and Ayla will not obey the seatbelt sign. Max is days away from three but days into acting three. Angie will fight anyone who supports bar soda guns; please email to arrange an altercation. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com

Sam is back with an update on his recovery (we know you've been DYING to know). Max falls in love with Polar Pops and rehearses his audition for their commercials. Angie finds a new love for her brother that she didn't see coming. Julie is still on vacation and usually writes these descriptions so they'll go back to being interesting next week.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Angie is joined by her "business partner" guest co-host, Sam while Julie is off creating family memories (and First Timers stories) on the east coast. The husband and wife duo discuss everything from how Angie is being left out of a Hawaiian family vacation to why Coldstone Creamery makes the greatest ice cream cakes ever. It's a very special tag team mom and dad episode that we're thrilled sort of excited for you to hear.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. And send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Sam's surgery luckily falls on a wedding-and-funeral-free weekend. Evie and Max argue vehemently over topics that are seemingly impossible to be vehement about. Early bedtime is a (mostly) stay-at-home mom's saving grace.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Sam’s baller status expires after just 20 minutes and Angie is (regrettably) resentful. Evie’s future-mom-of-many status expires after she learns about vaginal birth. This episode is dedicated to Molly … you’ll quickly learn why. Sorry, Molls! Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.  

Guest Joanna is so cool that her kid stopped napping just to spend more time with her. If that alone doesn't convince you to listen, the moms also cover unreliable toddler narrators, potty-training clingers and kid-whispering swim coaches.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com.

Will Evie’s girly hand-me downs not jive with Ayla’s masculine energy? Will Max ever put on his own shoes? The moms debate these burning issues and more. Meanwhile, John Lovitz breaks Angie’s phone and Julie almost breaks Ben Stiller. First Timers Promo Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com

Sam one-ups Julie’s sleep screams with sleep assault. After Max proves to be an all-star traveler, Angie makes a blood pact to repeat the trip every summer. Evie is fed up with Don’s potty mouth. NASA her a#$! And, the moms reminisce about 4th of July's of their youth. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com  

Did you know the key to parkour is yelling “PARKOUR!”? Have you heard the stereotypes about Presbyterians turned Atheists? Did you get “ground” in the 90’s? Guest, mom and sister abuser Shauna explains it all on this hilarious episode. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman

Local dad and resident “poopsmith” Phrai Freed joins the moms and opens up about the time his scrotum was opened up. Someone is leaving poop on Angie’s doorstep. Spoiler: it’s Angie! Julie sadly succumbs to the neighborhood parking bully. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman

Was Angie’s dog Reggie the village pregnancy test in a former life? Is Claire’s the worst place to bring a 15 month old? Were all of guest Pam Daniel’s girlhood crushes gay? Answers to these burning questions and more on today’s lovey-dovey episode.   Check out Pam’s podcast: https://weddingconfessionals.com Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast and send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. 

Angie is interested in brain development, but not enough to turn subtitles on. Evie loves mommy and hates puzzles. Plus: another money saving hot tip from Angie, queen of deals.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman

Comedian and non-profit founder Avram Mandell joins the moms to explain the role Souplantation played in his daughter’s birth and how a single fart altered his life. Angie tells us how her identity was also affected by flatulence. Julie introduces the world to SNL-character-IRL Tommy Da Plumber.  Visit Avram’s diversity training business at www.avrammandell.com First Timers Promo Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman 

Comedian and professional ballerina Nikki White explains why she’s anti goodie bag and pro pink pajamas. Plus, the moms consider major questions like: Do kids really need two sets of molars? Could Angie love six children? Are toddlers worse at Hide and Seek or Show and Tell? Follow Nikki on Instagram and Twitter @nikkidesplit; Check out networkbe.com Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman

The moms are live at The Gundo Comedy Festival! Angie hacks Hide and Seek, Julie launches Scone Day and Max takes center stage.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman

Comedian, musician, proud dad of cats and lukewarm dad of a human Frank Traynor visits the closet to talk AI apocalypse, LSD drops and H&M addiction amongst Latino tourists. Plus: Angie attends Mother Boy with Papi Chulo. Follow Frank on social media @frank_traynor. Go see his comedy show Graffiti the second Friday of every month at Mid-City Arthouse in LA.  Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman

Writer, actress, director Katie Locke O’Brien wonders why “leaning in” almost always involves blowing out. The moms also cover uniquely themed baby showers, fake science as a behavioral tool and Scone Day.   Check out Katie's short film at https://vimeo.com/259478576; visit her website www.katielockeobrien.com; and follow her on Instagram @katielockeobrien See First Timers LIVE at The Gundo Comedy Festival, Thursday May 17 at 7pm! Tickets and more info: www.thegundocomedyfestival.com Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman

After waxing poetic on Micro Machines, humorous boudoir and how to define “toddler,” fan recognized “cool moms” Angie and Julie wish they’d snapped and went. Then as a special 100th episode treat the hosts interview Max and Evie, who at two and four are already better at podcasting than their moms. Please do us a solid and subscribe to our show! Better yet, subscribe and then share an episode you like with a mom/dad friend. Also, rating/reviewing us on iTunes is super helpful to us. To stay in the loop, follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman and check out Angie's YouTube channel at YouTube.com/AngieEatsItAll

Evie can’t stop/won’t stop carbo loading. Max enjoys “juicy” sashimi. Ayla gives herself a cucumber mask. The moms share their very different weaning experiences. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman and check out Angie's YouTube channel at YouTube.com/AngieEatsItAll

Despite crankiness caused by spring breakers taking over the playgrounds, Angie bonds with Max over a favorite show from her childhood. Like many mom/daughter duos come before, Julie and Evie find common ground in reality television. Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman and check out Angie's YouTube channel at YouTube.com/AngieEatsItAll

Ayla cries to get into the tub. Evie cries to get out of the tub. Julie just cries. Meanwhile, across town, Max does some good old ball licking. Plus: Have you made the new-mom mistake mentioned in this week’s listener story? Both hosts have! Please subscribe to our show and rate us on iTunes or Stitcher! It really does help, we swear! You can follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com/FirstTimersPodcast. Send us your first time parenting stories at firsttimerspodcast@gmail.com. And, you can follow us individually on Twitter/Instagram @AngieGreenup @JulieFishman and check out Angie's YouTube channel at YouTube.com/AngieEatsItAll