Poetry

Title: Our masquerade with the plague Our masquerade with the plague, Has beaks, Dancing six feet away, Not to tread on someone's day. Kisses are now the devils PAYG (Pay As You Go). Futuristic I guess, But he still reaps what he sows. Welcoming death by cake, For we have many tiers of it. Layered and frosted with the cold. We're all dancing to a frozen song, Let it go, But listen for what goes on. All the achoos and the bless yous, And the thank yous for the tissues. The virtues for the curfews, And the subdues going cuckoos. And the confused feeling defused, Being unused socially bemused. Our party is full of malarkey, We've been set up to fall. However the clock has stroke 12, At our bleak beaking ball. Time to go home, Time to tell your kids a tale, A brothers Grimm, One with death and prevail.

You scare me, With your face like the moon. It turns like an owl, And stares with a loom. Your greetings are invites, And your words spoken like a tale. You can't be real, A human so pale. Not by completion but by complexity, A drawing of what a person could be. Your a mystical creature, Far from this land. But your nice enough, With gentle hands. I can forgive your solemn face, Because your heart ticks with grace. Come with me, We can escape this foreign place. Neither you or I belong to this race, We are part of people in space.

There's a numbness in my body like a dead leg, It comes from my heart and messes with my head. I try to feel the real me, Through harm and through pleasure. I've been hurt so many times, I just stand in bad weather. The scratches feel like kisses. My body a temple, Of doom. With only devils who enter, I dust away the grooms. No suitable matches, In this chapel that looms, An eirie cry of lonely tunes. I turn away from help, My cries just go straight to hell, Nobody bothers with the lies they tell, Otherwise they risk falling under my spell.

Void The crashing of unwashed dishes piled upon my sink,next to my bed, they really stink. So do I nowerdays when I don't step foot in the shower, because all is there is a mathmat as chewed up as chowder. My clothes make up the carpet, I can barely see what was there before. My underwear making appearances around the corner of every door. My sheets haven't been changed in weeks and my pillows covered in dread. The cleaning cub board untouched it's been solidified by spiders web. I really don't feel like cleaning my house, having a shave or walking about. I just want to lay in my sorrows until the day passes by and do the same tomorrow until the day that I die.

I'm not a bad person, I do feel what you feel. It's just unusual to unreel, The emotions that I feel. I want to show you I care, But all I do is stare. Wondering why your speaking bare, Tears everywhere. I don't understand touch, Why it's necessary, Are words not enough. For me to ask how you are, Is a blank question. Cause you'll respond, With human convention. Tell me what you want, I'm no good with lies. It's more puzzling for me, Than games of spies. I magnify what your trying to tell, But I'm in so deep, I fall under a spell. I can't turn away, My mind in another realm, Trying to make sense of your show and tell.

I see the dark as I open my eyes, I dream of clear blue skies. I see Gouls and goblins of the human kind, Scary thoughts pop up inside. My inner thoughts have demons, But I push them far away. To another land, For them to stay. They will never get me, For I am hidden in a secret place. In the warmth of my mother's arms, In her resting place. I am trapped. Locked away from the world, No one can hear my screams, From the underworld. I can hear faint crying, Above the grave. The tread of a man, With a worn out spade. I'd like to be let out now, I've changed my mind. My mother's warmth, Has slowly died. She left me a bony kiss, An indent of heavenly bliss. I am forever here now, Encased in my own remiss.

I'm downing in my thoughts, I make up love as if there's never enough, I am always crushed by my imagination, It and reality never match up. My wake up call, Isn't a bird or a song, An annoying tune or mother's humm. It's when reality and me just don't fit, I get hurt and hurt by human wit, Telling me my lies don't exist. I like to lie in bed, With two pillows, Blanked over head, And dream about another life, One with less pain, And more love at night. My wish is for one day, The blinds would unreel, And I see what I want to feel, My dreams becoming real.

In the mist of the night, The cold whispers his song. It gives you goosebumps, As you walk along. A straight narrow footpath, Bats flying through the air, An icy chill, A cold hard stare. Figures passing by, Shadows of the trees. Woodland animals scurrying, They're all awake you see. Lampposts flickering, Stars shining. Headlights are a glow, Leaves falling. Mornings calling, Time to go home.

Monkey'n Around Stay Banana stay, You make me happy everyday. As I swing from tree to tree, I'm as happy as can be, With you right next to me. So I sing a song, And you come along, Looking happier than me, To play with thee.

Last Wish I'm sick, I'm dying, But I just wanted to say, You take my breath away. I have 10 seconds left, The timer is on, I want to spend every second, Dancing in your arms. As you twirl me along, All I want is to hear, As you point to your heart, Baby I want you right here.

Why? Why do you do that? Why DO you do that? Are you doing this on purpose? This is actually unbelievable. How very dare you? So this is the price I have to pay. Why can't you leave me alone? Yet you live so far away. How could you leave me for another? I thought our love was like no other. I miss you. I MISS you. ...Every single day

Little One I hold my bump, I read a prayer, I feel it more, It's definitely there. I go to the doctors, Nervous, Holding my partners hand, This little lump wasn't planned. I wonder what to name it. The doc's got some ideas. We discuss how it's going to change my life! He mutters ‘it's all downhill from here'. My partners crying, But this lump has touched my heart. I just have to keep it, Or they would tear me apart. 9 months later, I'm in my bedsit gown, Partner by my side, Saying goodbye, And cursing the lump inside.

Give It Back I fill my room with tears, Crying at night for you. Whispers of a memory, Remind me of you. I am surely lost, Without love from you. I miss you dearly, I gave my heart to you.

Time to clean the sheets We've been together for many years, We take turns to clean and cook, Wipe the knobs, Sweep the soot. But the one thing that always stays clean, Is the sheets. They always look pristine, Maybe a crinkle and the seams. They haven't been washed since 2017, The one thing I wouldn't mind to clean. To make something clean, You must first make them dirty, But I haven't heard that word, Since I was in my 30's. One day I'd like us to make the bed, With warm sheets and some pillows for my head, We can make it a regular thing, To make it clean, But first we have to get in bed.

Behind Closed Doors 
Tee hee,
I like thee,
Kiss me.

Ok sure,
Let's shut the door,
Say no more.

Ow I banged my head,
Can I rest in your bed?
Let's sleep instead.

No,
I want more,
That's why I shut the door.

I don't want to,
Leave me,
Stop teasing me.

I said say no more,
Clothes on the floor,
What a whore. 




Hang Man I'm hungry,
No, 
Your not,
Yes, 
you are,
What?

I don't know anymore,
This feeling of hunger,
Is starving me,
Why won't I allow myself to eat?

I'm getting angry and tired,
Repulsive and withered,
My flesh is falling off the bone.

My head is tied up,
Hanging on its last thoughts,
I sway as the wind blows.

And as the crowd's cackle,
The bewitching hour,
Draws to a close,
I'm merely one of many,
Hanging in a row. 



Stray Stay away, For I am but a stray, The streets are mine, For me to roam. I will fight, Whoever comes near, For I am afraid, of kindness. As a stray, Bad things come my way, I cannot trust you, Mindless.

Frankly A Monster I seize, I stare, I hit, I kick, I grab, I tear, I groan, I stomp, And moan. I can't control, Monster there, When I stand, Crying, Pulling hair. I punch, I crunch, I Franken, I real, I trapped, In sorry ordeal. I not me, I something else, I cannot help, Limbs have mind of themselves. Don't be scared, Don't run away, I not like this, All time, Every single day, But if you hurt me, Don't blame me for body, I promise, I no hurt nobody. It fights it's own, I hurt alone. I sensitive soul, But monster, at home.

Little White Butterfly Today is the start of summer, One day of the year. My heart does desire, Your gracefulness near. Little white butterfly, In the sky, To where you go, Time does go by. Listening to my whispers, Enjoying your smile. Beautiful and wild, Only you can, Yearn my child.

Your eyes look like two black pieces of charcoal, Just like the ones we put on our snowman last January, Someone lit a fire and I can see it in your face, Ears steaming, Nose whistling, Sounding like a Choo Choo train. Remember when we were kids, And when we used to run to the station, Don't those memories make you smile, Or do they add onto that burning sensation. I told you to remain calm, But it tipped you off the edge, And when you fell on those tracks, I felt like the fire was going to spread, So I jumped in after you, To save you, But you got up and I died instead.

I tease the bees, As they see, The plant staring back at thee. Sat on my window, Beautiful and bright, But never quite felt the light. I opened the hatch, In bee came, But I shut it off again. Wing in pane, Blood pouring in the rain, Sweetly sane.

A Peaceful Night The stars are winking, My eyes are twinkling, Bare branches touch the sky. I stare into the gardens by, Quiet roads and foxes nigh. Neighbours sleeping, Kids are dreaming, Baby's screaming. Curtains closing, Windows jerking. Lights are turning, Shadows lurking, Sandman's flirting. I lay on my bed, A pillow for my head. Thoughts emerging, My mind is yearning, Brains still working. Awake till dawn, For breakfast a yawn. For sleep I mourn, A lost unicorn.

Kiss Amiss I could only wish, For a kiss. But for me, A kiss is a miss, Cause I dismiss, Another's hiss. Snakes are a burden, I'm most certain. The mouth deceits, I'll avoid the weep, By standing alone, On my two feet. Alone I shall be, But free from he, And others may be, Uncertain of me. Just leave me be, Alone and free.

Procrastination Procrastination is ones assassination, Thoughts of the devils mind. You instigate, The biggest sin of time. You loose your hours, To the powers, Of the blind. Time is of the essence, But you just grow your presence, Virtually entwined. Mans biggest sin, Online.

Together Forever I see, Eye sea, I see, Eye see. You and me, Me and you, Me and me, You and you. Together forever, Forever together, Together together, Forever forever. We shall see, Shall we see, See shall we.

Blade I used to think you were picking on me, But now I realise, I was. One blade at a time. You never touched my wrists, But you did touch my hips. That was a crime. Never prosecuted, You liked to hide, But I know the monster, That you are inside. I'd rather you've died, But “Hi”, from the other side.

Camera Man You are perfect. Your handkerchief, Your tie, Your rounded glasses, And your twinkly eyes. Goodness knows how you came to be, Everything is a teasing pleasure, I'm intrigued. I want to see, I want to see, Smile now, Don't be shy, Say cheese. A snapshot taken, A memory awakens, You captured a smile, I hadn't seen in a while. Only you, Only you, Seem to see the best in me.

Empty Suddenly it's all gone quiet, If emptiness had a sound, It'd feel like a riot. My hearts stopped beating, My hands have turned blue, No kiss on my lips, The love drained through. As I rest my head, The only comfort I get, Is one of feathers encased in lead, As I lay in my poison bed. I stay calm and collected, But I want to feel more, Where's my satin sheets, The ones that I asked for. I'm demanding too much, But theirs no one to hear my call, So I lay there, Waiting, Begging, Give me more.

Stray Stay away, For I am but a stray, The streets are mine, For me to roam. I will fight, Whoever comes near, For I am afraid, of kindness. As a stray, Bad things come my way, I cannot trust you, Mindless.

irdie Birdie Tweet A bird can try, A bird can tease, As if flys through the trees. It can sing, It can crow, Off and away it can go. It can cry, It can lie, But eventually it most definitely dies.

It's About Time Handed in my resignation for the first time. Thin white sheet with a scribble on the bottom line. Dear...date...thanks...bye, Paper folded into three lines. Envelope licked, Heart dropped quick, Body shaking to the sounds of my mind. Managers not there, I dropped it bare, Ran back to my chair. *next customer* please, Can I have a word please, *next customer* please, Office please! *customer* please, *manager* please, *let me go* please. Counting down the days, Till my last pay, Don't know what to say, It was great but, Hey who's gonna miss me anyway. It's home time, Alone time, No body's home time. It's cry time, It's high time, It's body shaking all the time time. It's my time, It's rhyme time, It's about bloody time.

High On Anxiety Who goes there? Was it you? I seem to see everything. The way she plays with her hair, The way he bounces in his chair, The way I make people stare. Stop looking! Stop staring. What's there to see? Apart from a small withdrawn figure, That seems to look a lot like me. My face looks sullen, With two black eyes, A repetitive trait, Passed down by generations of love and hate. It's funny how I judge others staring at me, When I know I stare longer at thee. This is the way my brain works, When I'm high on Anxiety. It's a class A, Used and abused by all in our society. It's the only deal money can't buy, One soul in exchange for this god damn high.

Angels In Love It's wrong to love you, But it feels so right. Call me controversial, You see our love is quite a sight. When I'm around you, I can hear the heavens sing. My heart keeps beating, I flutter my wings. Your no angel of darkness, Yet that's what you appear to be. I want you so bad, I'll join the dark side with thee. My wings may burn, And my halo may shatter. But my heart will to, If I don't approach this dark matter. To die alone, Or to die in pain. I don't know which one, But my heart can't sustain. So I clip my wings, And snap my halo. Was our love worth all this pain though?

A Forgotten Love I lost my heart to you, Never to be seen again. You traitor, You fool, I am not to be seen by men. I shall remain forever alone, Undisturbed and finally at peace. But I might as well be dead, For this is a sentence of monogamy. I am to be told, What I should do and what I should wear. A painted face of happiness, holding a chest full of grief. It hurts to see you happy, Why can't you be as miserable as me. You imp, You skimp, You crazy little beast. You hold hands with the devil, For you are two of the same. You burn everything that comes your way. Including my heart, Over and over again, Every single day.

Ghostly Encounters I'm dying,
I know that,
Yet my mind does not believe it.

I live every day,
Moving closer and closer,
To my loved ones.

I'm a haunting experience,
A daunting experience,
A thrill seekers paradise.

I'm pale and blue,
But not quite as free as the ocean or the sky.
Although I do sway like the waves,
From side to side. 

I have been called a ghost,
Yet I am alive.

Your Royal Heinieness 
 Entitle me,
Your Royal Highness,
Duchess of delinquency,
Duke of diabolical decorum,
For I am merely a peasant. 

I am far more devilishly defiant, 
My nose doth raise too,
Also, to escape the sinful sanitation of my body. 

I too have my fair share of Bread and Wine,
However the portion of scarcity increases one's attractiveness.
My gardens are far larger than yours, 
Though I claim them in silence.

The oaks,
The swans,
The streets I roam.
Belong to God's kingdom,
Not your own. 

I have but one difference,
I am free,
But equally nobody cares about you or me. 




As A Sapling Fruitful knowledge isn't born without a sting,
It can poison your existence as a sapling.
You're not allowed to blossom until the others have had a go,
Your strength is your weakness,
Be whole and be bold.

Your rooted differently,
Others can see,
But don't let it hurt you significantly.

As you grow in different ways,
You find nutrients far away.
Others can't reach,
So they beseech,
Why you were born this way?



Next The key to the heart of thee, Is to turn it with the touch of a locksmith. Turning it with no love or expertise, Is that of a pirate exposing a treasure chest, And robbing it until it feels empty.

This is why I have created my podcast, to share my thoughts, my life, my ideas with you. I'm hoping that through my pain, my happiness, I can help others. My poetry is hardly ever literal I tend to mean something else, that's why it may seem I am a different ‘person' in each one.