The Grumpy Marketers - Two middle-aged nerds have moan...

Today we talk about the 4 people we think have great marketing chops. 

I know... every month some annoying marketing 'guru' comes out and tells us that something is dead (usually email, Facebook, Instagram, SEO), but today we have a frank discussion about which demographics still use FB and where you can see some incredible returns on FB ads.  

We covered some idea validation strategies back in episode 30, but the feedback was so positive, we decided to do a slightly deeper dive.  

This is a good one! We had an enquiry from a listener about launching a new offer, so we thought it would be fun if I pretended to be the listener and Richard coached me! Loads of gold in this one.  PS. Want Richard to coach you? Find in on Instagram as @richardfletcherofficial

In this episode, Al steps up and explains how to validate an idea... In other words, you can quickly and easily find out if an idea for a product or service is a good one before you even have a name for it. Leaning heavily (no pun intended) on the Lean startup process, we will talk though our experiences of messing this up, plus give you tips for avoiding our mistakes.

Look, we get it.  You're highly unlikely to rank on page 1 of Google for something like 'marketing' (or your preferred single keyword). However, that doesn't mean you can't rank for other terms. In this episode, Richard demonstrates his super-simple method for finding opportunities to rank on Google for search terms that will actually bring you business. No expensive software or yucky backlink begging required!

You're gonna love this one. Reed is not only one of the top experts in the world on Jarvis, the new Artificial Intelligence tool from Conversion.ai. Listen as he tells us about: His very unusual school experience (I wish I'd gone to his school)   How he started a stock trading website when he was a teenager (and got a legal letter from one of the largest stock trading companies in the world!) How he uses Conversion.ai to create lengthy articles in just a few minutes (he's done hundreds of videos on this on his YouTube channel) If you enjoyed this, then use Reed's link to trial Jarvis for yourself.   Go follow Reed on YouTube. If you currently use Jarvis, then make sure you're part of the Jarvis Facebook group

Today it's Al's turn to take centre stage, as he explains: What the hell 'unmarketing' is, How you can use it with great effect in your marketing A simple, but so-far effective trick to get better engagement on FB ads Why he made up the word when there seems to be a perfectly good word already that describes it Sold you yet? OK - there's some swearing too.  See? Thought that would push you over the edge.

What the Fk is 'unmarketing;? Has Al made the word up?  You'll find out shortly.

Today we listen in as Richard interviews Harley Jordan, an Instagram superstar (over 30k followers), whose main strategy for increasing followers is doing Instagram reels. Harley is not only pretty amazing at Instagram, but she's also a genuinely lovely person too. Listen in as Richard learns the right way to IG reels, and go follow Harley on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/harleyyjordann/

When I heard Richard was going to interview Harley Jordan, a swimwear model who's absolutely nailing Instagram right now, I thought he was kidding.  He's nowhere near cool enough to find a guest like that. But he did - and the interview is brilliant. Full episode coming up in a day or so.  

I know, I know, we're halfway through 2021... ...Still, that means that our choices are going to be based on what's actually starting to work now, rather than just blindly picking some random, shiny trend and hoping that we're right (and never mentioning it again if we're not). Hope you enjoy this episode. As ever, it's packed with strategies and tips you can implement today (plus a few swears - sorry mum).

Get a sneak peek at the upcoming episode where Al & Richard chat about the 5 marketing strategies they think will be the most effective in 2021.

Let's be honest - there are so many marketing podcasts out there... why does the world need another? We're a little bit different. Not only do we have a combined 37 years in marketing, but we don't trot out the same old trite, like 'Just give value' - we chat about actionable, tried-and-tested marketing ideas, and take the piss out of each other whilst doing so. So, if you like grumpy middle-aged men who detest the 'bro marketers' and that bullshit 'live honestly-not-recorded webinar', then give us a go. I think you'll like it. (And if you don't, you've only wasted 3 minutes of your life - I bet you've spent at least 3 minutes on YouTube watching donkeys laughing...)

PART 2! Go to the previous episode (ep23) to hear lessons 1-9. Want to use words to sell stuff and build followers? You're going to love Richard's 18 new rules for social media copywriting. Creating persuasive posts on Facebook/Insta etc is the way Richard built his following. This week is part 2 of the two-part special where he takes us through the remainder of the 18 rules for creating effective copy.

PART 1! Part two coming next week... Want to use words to sell stuff and build followers? You're going to love Richard's 18 new rules for social media copywriting. Creating persuasive posts on Facebook/Insta etc is the way Richard built his following. This week is part 1 of a two-part special where he takes us through the first 9 of the 18 new rules for creating effective copy.

Today Richard explains how to stand out from the crowd, and we chat about the marketing bullshit hacks that just make people look daft!

If you're like most people, you love doing the thing you're famous for, but you hate selling it.  In this episode, Al outlines his 5-step system that will help anyone who hates sales not only sell better and close more deals but actually enjoy the process. More details at unselling.co.uk.

This week, Richard dissects an experiment he undertook a few weeks ago. We talk about Cialdini's Influence techniques, why being nice is important and the quickest way to annoy Richard. All the episodes and links are at GrumpyMarketers.com

This week Al talks about the way he builds Minimum Viable Campaigns that test an idea very quickly. In the old days, generating leads could take weeks to get off the ground, but thanks to the FB algorithm and the creation of simple drag-and-drop landing page creators, you can literally build a campaign in a matter of hours.  More information at TryMVC.com.

It seems that everyone is talking about Clubhouse, the audio-only app that launched last year. We give our opinions on whether it's any good, as well as our thoughts on the way they've marketed it (invite-only) and Richard's experience as a new user. And, before you ask, no we don't have any spare invites...  More information at GrumpyMarketers.com.

It's the beginning of January 2021, and as we tentatively touch-up the new year in a dark room, we come to the conclusion that most New Year's Resolutions are ridiculous. We discuss the way we do set resolutions, and Richard introduces his newest idea The Minimum Viable Day (MVD). Oh, and try to count how many times he gets the letters mixed up...

Listen as we gaze into our hairy crystal balls and make 4 predictions for marketing in 2021. We talk about micro-communities, the future of Facebook, the cancel culture & using humour in marketing.

The Statler & Waldorf of marketing are back to discuss all the bullshit around New Year resolutions and talk about the things they're not going to do in 2021. Listen to hear us hate on AppSumo (because they're clever fckers!), discuss Al's new invention 'The Circle of Give-a-Shittery' and why being lean with time might be the most important resolution ever.

We've had a lot of questions from listeners around selling during difficult times. Should we feel guilty? Should we pack up business and go home? Give it away for free? Discover our opinion on this, and hopefully, it will help you to make a better decision about running a business during difficult times.

Listener Vicky Worgan asks how to use scarcity & urgency in marketing without being slimy & icky (we added the 'shithead' bit...). We discuss ways in which you can incorporate these very powerful techniques in your marketing, without the bullshit that is so often used.

Richard and Al explain why they've been 'off air' since Feb 2019. Listen in for a very honest, behind-the-scenes view of running a podcast as well as a business. Oh, and usual, we have a moan about the crap that marketing gurus are peddling.

You'd never think that a motorbike zooming through a crowded Asian market would offer a profound marketing lesson (or any kind of lesson for that matter, beyond 'don't ride motorbikes through the market'), yet...during a trip round Vietnam, Al experienced all kinds of weird and wonderful sights/sounds/smells/noises... ...and realised a number of these provide valuable marketing insights for us back home. Episode 11 of The Grumpy Marketers is called '3 Marketing Lessons From The Streets of Hanoi'.

A lot of marketers are coming across like the 1980s 'smooth' guy in white chinos and avatars saying 'hey baby' and sliding a martini across the bar to his 'target'. Are you one of them? Better listen to verify.

What is the most important word in marketing? Is it sales? Customers? Big wads of cash? Ok, that's 4 words...anyway, listen to find out.

It's hard to find the right balance between being one of those obnoxious 'hardcore closers' types who are only interested in making you sign on the dotted line...and being terrified of selling at all. Here's how to do it.

As the title suggests...want to become a millionaire? Listen to Richard and Al.

Richard and Al debate whether 'funnel hacking' is really just ripping off the hard work of other people...and can funnel hackers survive long term?

Al grills Richard on what needs to go into a sales message (whether that be a Facebook post, video, long form sales letter, carrier pigeon etc). When you understand these principles, writing persuasive messages becomes a lot easier.

Is the elevator pitch a waste of time these days, given that everybody seems to be coming out with the same 'I help X person do Y thing' in response to the question 'so what do you do?' Spoiler alert: It's still valid, but only if you follow the instructions in this episode.

We've both screwed up a lot in our time as marketers. Here's the top 3 highlights for each of us. With a bit of luck, you can avoid making the same gut-wrenching, shameful mistakes yourself.

We all know about the customer avatar, where we create a fictional prospect, 'Linda'. 'Linda is 45, a single mother with 3 kids. She works 2 jobs to make ends meet.' We then pull a random stock photo of a middle aged lady off Google images and woop, our avatar is complete. Except we are missing something. Probably the most important thing. And we're not going to tell you what it is in this description.

Back in the day, banner ads were fuckers. What is the new banner ad for today? We talk about the history of banner ads, what pisses us off about about them and whether they can or do ever work. In their very first podcast, Richard and Al reflect on the bad old days when banner ads would ruin your life (and you'd end up clicking through to some weird Panda porn site in front of your nan) and look at the modern day descendants, like pre-roll ads and ask: ‘Should they all be wrapped in heavy cloth, weighted down and thrown off a trawler in the North Sea?' Naturally they're grumpy old men who don't hold back on their thoughts (or the swears), so if you're easily triggered... well you'd better press the stop button and go calm down with a Chamomile tea.