The Tom Barnard Show

The Met Gala happened again, and apparently it was a less ostentatious affair this year. That doesn't mean it was free of dumb stuff. Far from it. It does mean that we spend more time talking about festering skin lesions than what the celebrities were wearing. But who doesn't, really?Topics:Movie production coming back to AmericaMet GalaCapitol Records daysDr. Pimple Popper3000th episode partyBob/Tom interviewSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Spoiler alert if you care about Song Sung Blue. If not, perhaps you care about Michael? A lot of people seem to. Personally I think it sounds like a bit of a downer. And speaking of downers, have you ever had a BAC in the upper teens and still managed to walk around? That can't be easy.Topics:Glyphosate in wheatTom and Kathryn saw Song Sung Blue and MichaelKristyn in Salt Lake City for Dancing With the StarsSpirit Airlines defunctBritney Spears DUIMonkey outbreak in Fort LauderdaleMinnesota sportsEarthquake in MexicoCrested and non-crested geckosSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Kristyn's talking about it. Tim's talking about it. Even Craig Gass is interested once he learned who's in it. We're talking about Devil Wears Prada 2, a movie about how magazines and newspapers are floundering. And also fashion, probably.Topics:Grandparents' dayNicknames for grandparentsKristyn's late night flightDevil Wears Prada 2Anne Hathaway hall passCraig's Mat Becker intuitionRodney Dangerfield meets Eddie MurphyWill Smith's slap and its effects on comedyHecklersSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Our 3000th episode is a celebration not just of the show, but the people who've been part of it. Whether they were only there for a while or have been here the whole time, we've got more people on the show today than we could possibly fit into the studio at any given time. We still remember when we made a big deal about 500. I wonder how far we can take this thing?Guest list:Kristyn BurttMelissa BarnardMike GelfandMike RasmussenMike Molina (yes, we had three mikes on in a row)Don ShelbyJimmy FrancisTimmy LammersMichael Bryant, Bradshaw and BryantBob SanseverePaul "Meatsauce" LambertWinnie Schrader (AKA Cassie)Tevin PittmanSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

After nearly 14 years as a podcast regular, Kristyn finally meets us in person for the first time. She'll be there for episode 3000 as well, but it felt kind of dumb to have her fly all the way here for a 20 minute segment on a special, so she gets a bonus episode. She's here for the whole time, too. Also with us are Ralph, all the way from LA, and Dave. We're certainly not having any shortage of well-wishes today.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The internet is back! Kind of! We might not have five nines uptime, but we do have the ability to hold an only slightly disastrous conversation about these politicians. You know the ones.Topics:Truck ramping off a LamborghiniAppreciating where you came fromDance schedules are crazyRunning Point season 2Oprah makes another trillion dollarsThese politiciansAnthony Edwards' baby mamasSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The internet went down just before showtime, so instead we did what we could with what we had. The result? Pretty similar, but certainly different. This is just the most recent bad thing that's happened over the past few days.Topics:Correspondents' dinner shootingEthan gets sickPinningAll this hatredSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

There are certain movies they really shouldn't show on a plane. Nudity is, you'd think, a given. Marley and Me is also a given, but for a very different reason. Nobody wants a stuffy nose while at 10,000 feet. How about Michael? A little child abuse and psychological torment won't cause any problems for the audience.Topics:Song Sung Blue was sadSmoking is coming backMichael is polarizing I Swear is also polarizingSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tom and Kathryn are gone. That means today's show is just Andy and Kristyn, right? Nope, Kristyn is gone too. Good thing she's got a husband who's no stranger to a microphone. It's also a good thing that Bob and Mike Bryant were there, because Raphael is a sports oddsmaker - among other things. Have you ever bet on how many people John Wick would kill? You might have used his odds.Topics:Nostalgia in entertainmentRunning Point renewedDarrell Sheets apparent suicideBill as Ricky RicardoSports bettingMovie prop betsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What's it like to be a celebrity? Lots of money. Not a lot of peace. Everyone knowing you can be, ironically, very isolating. But one thing unites us all: we all get old. We also all pay lots of money for our license tabs. Except for Jesse. He gets two years' worth for $200.Topics:Dave Mason diesMichael JacksonThe isolation of fameNetflix might be buying Radford StudiosAging fast vs slowSPLC indictmentTribalismEthan's car adventureSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Concert prices are through the roof. DoorDash commands outrageous prices. Netflix is raising their rates. And all of this is happening while nobody has any money, apparently. How is this possible? We don't know. What we do know is that car repairs suck.Topics:Michael documentaryTicketmaster monopolyFood delivery service feesAlan Osmond diedIlhan Omar's accounting errorUK cigarette banTom's car repair billSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Patrick Muldoon and Bob from Bob and Tom are dead. Madonna doesn't even get applause anymore. Is the old world fading away? It seems so. That's why we name drop people like Errol Flynn and Andre the Giant. You'll never have an excuse for not knowing old names if you listen to this show.Topics:New show name brainstormPatrick Muldoon diesMadonna's lukewarm receptionTV is no longer the family gathering spotGood Fortune suckedYoung people don't like old thingsBob Kevoian diesBrock Lesnar retiredWrestlers and bodybuildersAndre the GiantSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Top Gun, Star Wars, and Toy Story continue to chug along. But even older than that is The Mummy. The first one was in 1932, and we're still being chased by it. According to Tim, the most recent one is certainly a different take on the genre. If you liked The Exorcist, you'll probably like this.Topics:Top Gun 3Toy Story 5Michael (MJ documentary)Lee Cronin's The MummyNormalThe Foshay Tower might get foreclosed onSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Disney is laying everyone off, TMZ is in the blackmail business, and voiceovers are all AI. Is anything okay in the entertainment industry? Yes: classic rock. There's a reason it's been called "classic" since about five years after it started. Larry Wiegand was a member of CROW, so he'll tell you all about it.Topics:Disney/Marvel layoffsScammersTMZ vs. capitol hillAI narrationVoiceover business is dyingLarry Wiegand from CROW60s/70s Minnesota musicDave Waggoner's celebration of lifeSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dr. Moricz joins us from the Alzheimer's Treatment Centers of America. That's the place Tom is going. If you've been curious as to the methods and practices, now's your chance to sate that curiosity.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees have been announced. Once again, the boy bands we all love have been snubbed. It's really tearin' up my heart.Topics:Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inducteesBoy BandsLorne Michaels retirement rumorsThe Twins are getting our hopes upAlzheimer's treatmentsQuestions for Tom from FacebookMinnesota schools are underfundedSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tony Price is back for his 71st Gold Star Ride. He also brings smooth jazz wherever he goes, apparently. The nice thing about hearing him tell his story on our show is that you don't have to pay a monthly fee to do so. Speaking of which, have you checked your subscriptions lately?Topics:TV is too expensiveTV is bad anywayMinnesota sports are looking okayTony's 71st rideLt Col Bob Stephanson joinsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Alex was not a fan of Something Very Bad is Going to Happen. Andy was a fan of Super Mario Galaxy. Is there anything we all agree on? Yes: repairing a toilet sucks.Topics:Kathryn attempts to replace a toilet seatByron Allen replacing ColbertBen Affleck and J-Lo's expensive houseTerry Barnard diedAlex hated Something Very Bad is Going to HappenAndy and Tim liked Super Mario GalaxyThrashScreen XSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Ketamine Queen has been sentenced. Hers was not a light sentence. Somehow this segued into Parkinson's and Michael J Fox, who's had the disease for over 35 years now. And speaking of things that lasted forever, Tom's 40th anniversary of the KQ morning show is later this month. What a perfect opportunity to reminisce.Topics:Minnesota's Trapp familyKetamine Queen sentencingPPP loan abuseMichael J Fox false death announcementCar chasesTwins are getting betterBob interviews TomSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Some people retire and that's it. They're done doing things. Some people retire and end up roped into more activities than ever before. Personally, I hope to be the former, but it's rarely up to you how your life turns out. But no matter who you are, there's always pizza.Topics:Terry is still aliveAndy sees Super Mario GalaxyThrillerForgotten subscriptionsGamblingPhone addictionThe KQ daysHow Mike and Tom metRod CarewSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Yesterday we talked about smoking, Fleetwood Mac, and moon missions. Today it's gas breaching $5 a gallon and Super Mario Galaxy. It's another blast from the past episode. I swear we don't do this on purpose. Topics:Gas is expensiveLeft-handednessBlake Lively's sexual harassment suitBaldnessSuper Mario GalaxyLove StorySomething Very Bad is Going to HappenSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Humans haven't passed the Van Allen radiation belt in over 50 years. In a few days, that changes. But that's just boring old space travel. The real news is that Passolt can still do his Burnsie impression on command.Topics:Judges letting predators off easyArtemis II launchKristyn's 2028 Olympics ticketLindsey Buckingham stalkerSmoking is cool againJeff PassoltKQ glory daysSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tom and Kathryn were at Mar-a-Lago last night. What's it like in there? Gaudy? Yes, gaudy. We also have Ben Simon, owner of Shed and Fence on. Our listeners had a surprising volume of fence-related questions for him. Maybe if he sells enough fences he can afford one of those $20,000,000 condos in West Palm Beach. But that's a lot of fences.Topics:Mar-a-LagoRob SherwoodStaples baddieMovies are too longShed and FenceFence questionsBillionaires in West Palm BeachWPB Bristol condos showcaseSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Bob's got a new project: interviewing Tom. Every Tuesday, he'll be asking questions and fielding some from the audience. The ultimate goal is to compile a book's worth of answers. How long that'll take, who knows? Probably less time than it'll take to finish Grey's Anatomy.Topics:Death & Life of Lamar OdomCelebrity drug addictionKathryn's birthdayFirst vs. last childGrey's Anatomy is still goingBob's first interview with tomSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tiger Woods rolled his car again. Was he under the influence, or is he just a really bad driver? We can't say for sure, but we can certainly infer. We can also pine for the good old days of terrible local television. It wasn't all terrible, but in West Palm Beach there was a period where the overall quality was...lacking.Topics:Colin's first wordCubaTiger Woods car accidentEating vs metabolismDon Shelby's final Mark Twain showFlorida TVEternitySchool lifeSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Our new dream job is to be the guy who has to eat all the food on a yacht before it goes bad, then buy more food. Then do it again. Forever. If that's not available, being an albino squirrel seems like a pretty good gig. You get Facebook pages made for you and everything.Topics:Cuba's Alzheimer's researchOscars are movingFlorida's Mount TrashmorePete the pigeonFood is expensiveThey Will Kill YouRocky's 50th anniversarySuperyachtsPhillip WiseSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It's a show of contrasts, and also of cities. Tom likes West Palm Beach. Kristyn likes NYC. Jay likes Duluth. Only one of those places has a book called 100 Things to Do in Duluth Before You Die written about it. Can you guess which one?Topics:YouTube/Meta lawsuitGen Z can't find jobsCollege lifeDuluthSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

She's been on film sets across the country. She's been partially in the space shuttle. She's even been to the Pompano Beach dump. This is the life one leads as a casting director. And now that Sora is winding down and Disney isn't putting a billion dollars into replacing actors with AI, it would appear the position is safe. Everybody wins.Topics:Sora AI being shut downPeople quitting CNNSavanna Guthrie on TodayIowaEllen's careerSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jude survived his surgery yesterday, and as a bonus Kathryn got to keep the bladder stones. Apparently they're not as gross as you'd imagine. You probably don't want any, regardless, so remember to keep your diet low in whatever causes them. Rocks, probably. Stop eating rocks.Topics:Jude's surgeryToo many Taylor Sheridan showsReal possum found in storeBaby animal storiesTrans fatsPhilip WiseLouie Anderson's birthdaySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On Friday, Tom announced his Alzheimer's. Since then, we've gotten approximately one billion comments. Maybe slightly fewer. We read and appreciate all of them - the ones that are nice anyway. But you know what isn't nice? Outliving your friends. Today we also remember Philip Wise and Dave Waggoner, whose deaths we learned about in the past couple of days. We also touch on the Jessie Pierce house fire. All in all, not a good week.Topics:Philip Wise deathMichael Jackson vs. The BeatlesJessie Pierce house fireJude going into surgeryAlzheimer's news reactionsDave Waggoner deathSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Chuck Norris is dead and The Bachelorette has been cancelled. Could this day get any worse? The answer to that depends on how you take medical news about people you probably don't know.Topics:Chuck Norris diesTaylor Frankie Paul dramaTom's diagnosisPositive thinkingSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The way we think is a lot like a social media feed. The more we see something, the more we see it. That sounds like a tautology, but I promise it isn't. That's why you're going to be thinking about purple beards more frequently after today. If that interests you, or you just want to see some comedy, why not head to Gambit Brewing on March 24th at 7 PM?Topics:Cash CallFundaMental iLLNeSsBrain algorithmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In the first half of the show, Tom declares that he's done with every politician. In the second half, we find a politician we like. Never let it be said that we're not a dynamic show, at times.Topics:Wasting money on forgotten subscriptionsBob Barker the sleazebagPeople leaving garbage everywhereDalia's upbringing/immigration storyMinnesota political divisionSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It's Saint Patrick's day again, which means...surprisingly little. At least around here. We still like to talk about it though. Remembering the good times when a bunch of meat and whiskey didn't make us feel sick. Ah, memories.Topics:Saint Patrick's dayIrish ancestryMormon Wives dramaMikey the MuleMinnesota sports suckMovies also suckSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Oscars - or Academy Awards if you're so inclined - happened again. It's like the rising and setting of the sun, except the sun doesn't have a host or wear horrible clothes. Unless it does. If it did, would we know?Topics:OscarsNew vs. old definition of "celebrity"Weekend snowstormPrivate equity ruining everythingSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We've been promised yet another snowy apocalypse. Will this one be real? We hope not, because if so we won't be able to leave our house. There will be no escaping the Oscars. Although you can pass your time shoveling your driveway. That's always fun.Topics:Modern TV viewershipTaylor Sheridan has too many showsAlec Baldwin legal troubleThis weekend's snowstormTim's Oscar betsAward shows are full of themselvesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Once upon a time, the Twins were good. During that time, Kent was with them. Now we're not saying that Kent singlehandedly brought the team to victory, but the correlation is difficult to ignore.Topics:News bloopersOscarsSecurity at the OscarsOld vs new carsHome appliance repairThe MetrodomeMinnesota TwinsStats vs. heartMinnesota Broadcast Hall of Fame inducteesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Crocs are back. Well, they've been back, but we're just now noticing. Impressionists are also back. In fact, it seems like the two ebb and flow in almost perfect sync. That can't be a coincidence.Topics:Crocs are cool againKristyn interviewing tall peopleLicense plate tab costsLiza Minelli tell-all bookImpressionsComedySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Flintstones. They're pretty old, literally and figuratively. I mean, the 60s was a long time ago, but it's got nothing on the Stone Age. There's also a nearly 200 year old tortoise out there, and baseball legends that haven't played in over thirty years. History has something for everyone, really.Topics:Punch the monkey (and other euphemisms)Corey Feldman vs. The OscarsFlintstonesMinnesota VikingsMinnesota Twins glory daysVery old tortoiseSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Remember when we brought up the "dill dough" incident? We're bringing it up again, and this time we find it. Turns out we had it clipped the whole time. Who knew? What we do know is that an emergency has been reported in the building. Do not use the elevators.Topics:Kristyn's pickleball injuryDill doughEating unusual animal partsDaylight saving timePunch the monkeyDecommissioned Simpsons charactersSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you're the CEO of a burger chain, you should probably like the burgers. Or at least know how to eat one properly. Lest you be clowned upon. In more local news, Tim finally saw the movie he's been anticipating since what feels like the 1930s. Was it good? I'll never tell. That's his job.Topics:McDonald's CEO burger bite"Gourmet burger"Scrubs episode 2Too many streaming servicesThe Bride!Kutcher/Masterson debacleSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you're a Minnesotan, you've probably been to Valleyfair. And if you haven't, go while you still can, because it just got sold. Who knows what comes next? Fewer flags means less fun, as we all know.Topics:Marshals isn't very goodWB toursValleyfair sold to investment firmBritney Spears DUITom's first pitchNobody is buying paperbacksTicks and mosquitosSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.