Hire Us as Your Writers

Hell yeah dude! On this episode of Hire Us as Your Writers, Riley and Evan are gonna rub one out of a genie lamp as they reboot I Dream of Jeannie.     

This week, the Writers turn back the clock to turn fashion moguls Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen back into plucky children, and wacky hijinx abound!

Heyyyy I'm Talking Here! This week, journey with the Writers to New York City as they reboot telepathic baby romantic comedy Look Who's Talking.   Our condolences to Roger Ebert and his family. 

We're looking for love in all the wrong places as the Writers reboot dating shows. Will this episode be the one for for you, or will it leave you like a cold fish?

It's 2008 all over again as the Writers wade into the wild world of house hunting. Will they Love It? Or will they burn it down for insurance purposes   Also on this episode: Identifying Haiti, the dangers of Chantix, and staying on topic somehow.

Primetime is a fine time with the Writers! This week, the Writers judge and are judged themselves as they attempt to revamp all competition shows. Will they win this Amazing Race, or will they Wipeout?   Also on this episode The Pod goes on Shark Tank, bash teen challenges, and nearly tear each apart due to creative differences

Rise and Shine Executives!! The Writers are back from yet another hiatus to bring you the first part of an exciting two part series. Today, listen in as the Writers appeal to the Elder Gods and find out who is baby Leon's father in Daytime Night Suffering!    Also in this episode: Some dated memes and Skip Bayless

In the exciting conclusion to the Star Wars: BOoTOR pitch, Evan and Riley do what they always do and make a masterpiece

May the Humor be with The Writers as they create a brand new entry in the Star Wars KOTOR Canon. Experience the exciting action and Imperial bureaucracy as you attempt to start a small business in a Galaxy far far away. Will this comedic Empire Strike Back? OR will it just be a Phantom Menace?   Also in this episode: Men's Wearhouse reminiscence, the evolution of video game sex, and WOULD YOU LIKE TO ROLL A CHANCE CUBE?

Blue 24! This week, Evan and Riley reboot that greatest of American past times: Football! Listen in as the Writers change the NFL in ways Will Smith's Concussion could never dream. Will they throw a Hail Mary, or will their comedy hit the goal posts and fall out onto the endzone.   Also in this episode: Season 2, Ass slapping, this clout shit, and labor disputes in football. 

When there's something weird, playing in your ears, what pod is that? HUAYW! The Writers certainly aren't afraid of ghosts as they reboot Ghostbusters - again!!! Listen in as they visit another of the Midwest's frozen mudpits and VERY CAREFULLY make another hit movie.    Also in this episode: Gal Gadot is violent, Ghost Fellatio, and a Bond Reunion, and a light critique of corporate dehumanization

Consumerism ho Executives! Not sure what products to buy this Christmas season? Let the Writers pitch products both old and new as they make Christmas commercials to fill the heart and empty the pocket. Will this episode be the Tickle me Elmo of podcasts, or will they make a rainbow coloured poop unicorn (it's real)   Also on this episode: Solving the opioid crisis, Don't Wake Adrian Peterson, and Smiffy's Mufflers gets a real commercial

This week, guest Writer Lauren comes on the show and attempts to reboot musical masterpiece Les Miserables. Will they win one for the Motherland, or will revisionists end their cultural revolution? (not the Maoist one)    Also in this episode: The corporate world of ransom, one word impressions, and the horrible fate of Goofy. 

Yeehaw Executives! This week, Riley and Evan blow .310 BAC while they reboot 3:10 to Yuma in this exciting installment of Crowe-Vember. Will they tame the West, or will this episode be buried at Boot Hill.   Also this week: Bashing late night comedians, theorizing presidential opinions, and Riley just steals a bunch of stuff from Red Dead Redemption

In a continuation of Crowe-Vember, Evan and Riley once again wade into a minefield when they reboot Russell Crowe spy thriller, A Beautiful Mind, or do they? Will their minds prove to be beautiful, or were they crazy for trying to reboot this movie? 

Veni Vidi Vici Executives! In this newly restored bonus episode, The Writers do as the Romans do and create the sequel to beloved Russell Crowe flick Gladiator. Will this cross the Rubicon into hilarity, or will the Emperor feed them to the Lions?    

Jimminy Jillickers Executives!!! This week, the Writers reboot the Red Scare with their thinly veiled propaganda flick: THE RED TEAPOTS FROM OUTER SPACE!!!! Will they heat up the Cold War in our hearts, or will they be brought before HUAC?   Also in this episode: The Whip Cream Incident, Riley talks about Sidehackers, and EVAN DOESN'T EDIT THINGS OUT

What was that Executives? Oh, the window just closed. This week on Octerror, the Writers fill their gullets with food and their audience with fear when they perform exorcisms for food in Exorcising Eateries. Will it be hauntingly funny, or did the Writers not stand a Ghost of a chance?   Also on this episode: Evan and Riley open a bar, we learn the dangers of all vegetables, and the podcast becomes a The Colony Fancast. 

Happy Octerror Executives! This week, the Writers create a sequel to Halloween featuring the only thing scarier than the other Halloween reboots: Unproven Medical Treatments OOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!! Will this episode be essential (oil) listening, or will it shatter like a salt crystal?    Also in this episode: Andrew Jackson is terrifying, Evan reads copyrighted material, and Riley educates you on serial killers.

It's officially October and you know what that means: The Writers get Spooky as they create 4 new episodes of Ironic Sci-fi Anthology The Twilight Zone. Will they end up in Willoughby, or will their glasses shatter in the post nuclear Wasteland? Tune in and find out!   Also in this episode: Riley does Rod Serling, and the Writers slander Florida

Is this episode the Resolute Desk? Because it's hollow! Listen as the Writers create a brand new sequel of National Treasure, sending Nic Cage and Sly Stallone in search of the Fountain of Youth! Will this episode be another Face Off, or will it just be a Ghost (Rider 2: Spirit of Vengeance) of it's former glory.   Also this week: Killdozer, a few musical numbers, and a promise to never record at Riley's place ever again because it literally always ends in a lost episode. 2/2 baby. 

Expecto some goofums! This week, the Writers revisit the ancient halls of Hogwarts, creating a brand new RPG set in the Harry Potter universe. Learn and laugh as the Writers kill prefects, bash Hufflepuff and refuse to learn any spells. Will the Writers end up with a Felix Felicis potion, or should they drink a Polyjuice potion and turn into a better podcast?   Also in this episode: Evan knows way too much about Harry Potter, Riley dies of Coal Lung , and The Writers shit on a garbage fan theory   Go Momentum

DEBRAAA!!! This week, the Writers visit Long Island to reboot the unflavored oatmeal of a sitcom that is Everybody Loves Raymond. Watch as the unforgettable rivalry of the Barone siblings ramps until the final bloody confrontation between a Police Officer  and his Mafioso Brother. Will this episode be a well adjusted adult, or will it just sit on the couch and scream for it's wife?   Also in this episode: The Writers bully Hollywood Reporter staff, Riley reminisces about the Order of the Phoenix, and Evan preemptively honors Burt Reynolds' in his greatest role. 

They Live! After two weeks locked in the Zodiac Killer's Lair, the Writers are finally back to turn beloved 90s sitcom Full House into the crossover Friday Night Comedy it was meant to be! This ain't your daddy's Full House reboot, or especially Netflix's. Will they clean up, or will they have you screaming "HAVE MERCY!!!"   Also in this episode: Riley cries over the Triple Axle, Evan reveals some behind the scenes secrets, and Evan ruins Jell-O for Riley.   

Do you hear wedding bells? The Writers sure do! Join them as they reboot Othello: the play so nice, they renamed a board game after it. Will it be happily ever after, or will this play be smothered by its own shortcomings?   Also in this episode: High school curriculum, Riley discusses his magic stage show, the basketball career of Barron Trump, and the Writers try out way too many impersonations. 

This week, the Writers get serious as they reboot beloved Korean War Dramedy M*A*S*H. Watch as they turn this comedy-drama into a drama-drama. Will they create a show beloved by Dads and Grandfathers everywhere? Or will they fall flat on their face in a Punji Trap?   Also in this episode: The woes of customer service, Riley gets political, and the Writers avert a national tragedy, causing an even larger one in the process

This week on Hire Us as Your Writers, the Writers have superhero fever/ alcoholism as they reboot the surprisingly successful Will Smith film, Hancock! Join the writers as they journey to Gary, IN, "Abscess of the Midwest" and create the greatest superhero seen since 1829. Will they Smith another classic? OR will they be as insufferable as Jaden Smith? Tune in and find out!   Also in this episode: Evan and Riley give you the secret to ab shredding workouts done right in your own home, Riley discusses how cringey he was in high school, and the Writers analyze Gerard Butler's film career.

Whoa! This is the Writers very first Fan requested Episode!!! Take a trip to the Land Down Under as Riley and Evan make a sequel to Mary Poppins, filled with Wombats, Soot, and way too many tangents. Will they make yet another hit, or is this project doomed to suffer from pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis? (Google it!)   Also in this episode: The Writers teach you about chimney cleaning and the anatomy of London's lower class, discuss Dick Van Dyke's career choices, and start a cult. 

In honor of our nation's birthday, the Writers visit flyover country, creating the spiritual successor to beloved A&E drama Longmire. Can the Writers create a comedy good enough to be picked up by Netflix due to declining cable viewership? Tune in and find out!   Also in this episode: Riley's kleptomania steps into the spotlight, Evan deals with living in his mom's basement, and the writers reminisce about a long dead hometown eatery. 

On today's episode, the Writers discuss the recent Electronic Entertainment Expo, or E3. Will they make the next God of War, or will it just be Watch Dogs 3? Also in this episode- The Writers create a surprisingly solid entry in the Battlefield series, we see the effects of alcohol on Riley, and find a cure to the Madden Curse.

Coming hot off the perceived success of Ghost Taxi, the Writers are back to pitch a reboot of a classic 00's sitcom as well as a chilling successor to a beloved 80's comedy. Also in the episode, Riley challenges a Late Night icon to a duel, Evan does impromptu research, and we're introduced to a mysterious femme fatale.   Tune in to Hire Us as Your Writers, available wherever fine podcasts are sold. 

Oh hello, we didn't see you there! Welcome to Hire Us as Your Writers, a comedy podcast with your hosts/pitchmen/writers Evan and Riley. Together, we design and pitch high quality reboots and spin-offs of your favorite media properties.   Today on the show, we reboot an old 90's standby, and revitalize New York's private transportation industry to boot. You'll hear about friends both old and new, and rumor has it an Ice-T impersonator will make an appearance.    What does the future have in store for our starving artists? Tune in and find out on Hire Us as Your Writers, saving Pop Culture- One Hour a Week