On Purpose: The Heidi Stevens And Dr. John Duffy Podcast

On this week's episode we discuss the cannot miss upcoming book "Parent Nation" that Heidi has been working on, how to understand the drivers underneath the stress and anxiety of today's kids, how to find a good therapist for your kid, and more!

Today, we talk with Heidi's courageous friend, Deb, sharing some of the struggles she's experienced in her family, and offering brilliant advice on how we can react with kindness and empathy, and avoid unwittingly causing unnecessary emotional pain. This is a good one!

Today, after a somewhat prolonged hiatus, Heidi and John are back. In the wake of the recent talk of banned books, they are are talking about the material: books, media, halftime shows, and Joe Rogans, that we might expose our kids to, and what we keep out of their hands. They also talk about the ways in which challenging materials and topics can enrich the parent-child relationship. And believe it or not, they plan to be back soon with another episode!

Sen. Josh Hawley's recent comments about masculinity being under attack compelled us to put together our thoughts on this topic, especially amongst our youth. We talk porn, video games, Aaron Rodgers, and more!

On this episode of On Purpose, we're talking about the phenomena of college enrollments continuing to drop over the past two years, and the growing tendency for young adults to retreat into video games and parents' basements. What's driving this trend? And perhaps more importantly, what can be done about it? 

We're back! This week we're talking about the tidal wave of phone calls John's office usually receives this time of year as modern kids juggle typical age-related stresses with the looming existential threats that dominate the news these days. Also, some advice for parents on how we can help out our kids by simply becoming better listeners!

This week, we discuss Heidi's decision to move on from her long-time role at The Chicago Tribune. We talk about the story of her time there, how her column "Balancing Act" came to be, as well as what's next on the horizon. Enjoy!

Illinois is finally reopening! As normal life begins to resume, we're noticing that a lot of people are changing directions. In this episode, Heidi & John explore why that might be. John also recounts how meeting his wife, Julie, inspired him to quit accounting to become a psychologist, and much more!

This week we're discussing the changing views about relationships and marriage amongst youngsters these days. Power dynamics are balancing out, and marriage doesn't necessarily have to be everyone's end goal. Find out what we think and more!

Heidi and John are checking in to give an update on all things pandemic parenting. They talk about how strict/lenient we should be with our kids during this time, growing up as a boy versus a girl these days, and more!

The worst of the pandemic is hopefully behind us, and some of the kids in our area are returning to school. So this week, John and Heidi are talking about some of the challenges they might encounter as they begin to socialize again. We also discuss the role of leniency in parenting during the pandemic as a way to promote positive family vibes!

This week we talk to Michelle Icard, who is an accomplished speaker, educator, and author of the new book, "Fourteen Talks By Age Fourteen." The book covers essential conversations to have with your teen or tween before they start high school. Michelle is one of our favorite experts on all things teenagers, so don't miss this one!

This week we're talking about President Joe Biden's inauguration and the uplifting atmosphere it created. We also unpack some of the underlying psychology of why certain people may be vulnerable to believing in lies that would make them participate in events like storming the Capitol. Enjoy, and take a deep sigh of relief!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              

This week we're talking about the unique holidays that are upon us, reflecting on 2020, and considering the crucial role that therapy might play in 2021 and beyond. Happy Holidays and New Year! 

Today, we reflect on the celebratory announcement from Elliot Page that he is transgender, and how our thinking around this community has changed so radically toward acceptance in a very short period of time. 

We're back! Heidi recently recovered from Covid and is back to her usual self, so this week she's sharing the full story of her experience. 

This week, John finally reveals the secret retailer from which his vests are purchased! We talk about the ways that work and life are beginning to blend, the future of what American life might look like, the recent shenanigans of you-know-who, and whether or not kindness and nuance can ever prevail over the current situation. Nothing heavy here! 

This week we're talking about the recent CDC study reporting that one-quarter of young adults has contemplated suicide during the last month. We attempt to unpack the pandemic-induced hopelessness this generation is facing, whether or not a popular coping mechanism is actually helpful, and how simply listening can be the best way to start sorting through this. 

The ongoing, ever-changing situation about the uncertainty of the upcoming school year seems to have our kids in a general funk of disconnection and indifference. What can we, as parents, do about this? Can the pandemic actually serve as a common enemy for parents and kids to bond over? This week we're breaking down some of these things in an attempt to figure out how can we best help our kids during this time. Enjoy!

This week we're talking about therapy in weird places, and how the ongoing quarantine is beginning to make friendships difficult to maintain. We also talk about the likely rise of social anxiety amongst kids as certain activities are allowed to resume —particularly the habits of dwelling on worst-case scenarios and predicting negative outcomes. 

This week we've got a few topics to unpack: the way companies are handling — or might be reluctant to handling — race discussions, keeping these conversations energized as the weeks start to pass, and how young people have become a vital source of hope and optimism. 

In the wake of the terrible events in Central Park & Minneapolis this week, we’re joined by two of Heidi’s African American friends, Sherri Murphy and Raynya Simmons, to talk with them about their perspectives and experiences, as well as some insights about how to move forward.

Heidi's basement flooded. John needs a new water heater. Both of them feel that school did not prepare them for the finer details of homeownership. We eventually get around to discussing the nature of cynicism and how it's become challenging to resist lately. We promise it flows...like water!

This week we're venting a little about how we're doing and some concerns we have as parents, talking about our kids' perception of what the next few years might look like, and even riff on some silly ideas that were marketed to parents in the 90s. Don't worry - we eventually find a little optimism, too. 

Let's be real here. There's no good way to do this quarantine thing. It's okay if it just kinda sucks. So this week we're talking about embracing that notion, letting go of what a perfect quarantine might look like, and maybe even indulging in a little more Animal Crossing!

This week we're exploring how much of our pandemic-related anxieties are okay to be sharing with our kids. We're also discussing some movies and tv shows that have helped our families keep our minds occupied and even inspired some discourse. Enjoy!

This week we're talking all things quarantine: is it okay to cry in front of your kids, should we be sticking to our routines, and do we really need to be using this time in a productive way? Also, Brene Brown is overrated. Enjoy!

This week, we're talking about just how different daily life is from just one week ago, tossing around a few ideas about how we're coping through all of this, and sharing some inspiring anecdotes about some unique ways people are helping. 

This week we're joined by our good friend Bela Gandhi, dating coach extraordinaire, to talk about The Bachelor and some of the negative ideas about gender it might be perpetuating. 

This week's On Purpose is a natural, zesty enterprise where we touch on the Super Tuesday aftermath, Coronavirus, author Rebecca Makkai taking to Twitter to console people's deepest worries, this year's Zen Parenting Conference, and things that anchor us in crazy times. 

Hillary Clinton retweeted Heidi! I REPEAT...Hillary Clinton retweeted Heidi! So this week, we're throwing a virtual ticker-tape parade via Skype that you won't be able to see at all since, ya know, podcasts are inherently an audio medium and all that. We'll also get around to discussing the ins and outs and what-have-yous of women's fashion on the campaign trail, the most recent Democratic debate, the verdict in the Harvey Weinstein trial, and more!

Breaking news! A new study shows that same-sex marriages tend to be happier than traditional ones. So this week, we're breaking that down and diving into what you can learn and considering what we all can learn about relationships by loosening gender norms and stereotypes. 

J-Lo & Shakira sang a few songs on TV this week, and it was so controversial that they had to put half a football game before and after it. But was it really that big of a deal? 

This week, we're talking about how creating in-jokes is an absolute must for keeping your relationships fresh, fun, and alive. A good in-joke also has the power to craft resilience in a relationship over time, and just make the harder stuff a little less hard. Also, an in-depth review of Gwyneth Paltrow's new $70 vagina candle. 

In this week's episode, Heidi shares some surprising insights from her chat with Peggy Orensetein, author of the new book, "Boys & Sex." Also, in the fallout of the most recent presidential debate during which Bernie Sanders questioned whether or not a woman could actually get elected president, we ponder that very thought. 

We're back! In the first episode of 2020, we're talking about how consent and improving communications often pays massive dividends in the relationships of young people, as well as some startling insights from Peggy Orenstein's new book, "Boys & Sex." We don't talk about porn. Or horses. 

In light of a certain piece of headline news and divisiveness surrounding it, it can be easy to plant yourself firmly in one camp or another without considering the humanity of those on the other side. So that's what we're talking about today. It's important to remember that we're all just humans. 

This week we're talking about Heidi's weird Thanksgiving that ended up at a Boston Market of all places, which gets us reeling on the idea that there is basically no such thing as "normal," except for the weird kind. Enjoy!

This week we're diving a little bit into the relationship between work, self-worth, and purpose. Just how much are all these things interconnected, and how possible is it to separate them? And what's this work-life balance thing all these dang millennials keep hollering about??? 

In this week's episode of On Purpose, we talk about an article that caught Heidi's attention recently about the three battles you should stop picking with your teenager, and consider the pros and cons of these common areas of contention. 

Before you listen to this...take five minutes to yourself. No phone. No email. Maybe just a cup of coffee. Then...make sure you listen to this, because we're talking about all kinds of stuff, like the Chicago teacher's strike, why men don't bring their kids to therapy, and how integrating masculine energy into a healthy family dynamic results in a win for everyone. 

It's true! Our playbook is outdated, and we just don't get it! Nevertheless, this week we're talking about a bunch of things - what John and Heidi have been up to recently, why you don't have to be flawless to be gutsy, some interesting insights into the transgender bathroom debates, whether bullying is still prevalent amongst teenagers, and more!

In this week's episode, Heidi and John discuss the tragic story of Channing Smith, who died by suicide after his intimate conversations with another boy was made public. It's extremely important for parents to understand that the teenage mind does not have enough life experience yet to understand resiliency, that life goes on, and that they will indeed recover from instances like this. So what can we parents do to prevent something like this from happening to our own loved ones? We can start by leading from a place of empathy. 

On a great note, John's new book, "Parenting The New Teen In The Age Of Anxiety," is finally out! On the other hand, Heidi's column this week was about the shocking new study claiming that the first sexual experience of 3 million women in America was rape. So...this episode meets those two notes somewhere in the middle and gets to the heart of how we can work to address issues like these, and it starts with taking the initiative to talk to your kids much much sooner about topics we'd probably rather not. This episode is a little heavier than our usual conversations, but it's for good reason. We promise to return to our regularly scheduled upbeat demeanor after this one!

Are parenting apps that monitor our kids' every move robbing them of something very valuable? In this week's episode, we're talking about the pros and cons of being constantly aware of their grades, social media usage, and even if they're speeding or not — and how all of this information is affecting their ability to be in touch with their own feelings and emotionally regulate themselves. 

On today's episode, we travel a wide range of the emotional spectrum – from Heidi's column about how the suicide of a Naperville teen led to the creation of a new law, to kids these days and their desire to understand what's going on in the world, to evil Juul ads, to travel and how it can affect our relationships. You'll experience some sadness, some anger, some optimism, and some humor. A Balancing Act, if you will. You won't experience John promoting his new book. Which will be out in a few weeks.     

John has never made a big deal about his birthday, even as a kid. Can you believe that? But Heidi's son just turned 10, and it kind of is a big deal. So which is it? Should birthdays be a big deal, or not? We're hashing out the complexities in a bitter fight to the death. Or maybe it's just a friendly, insightful discussion as usual. You'll never know unless you tune in. Also, John's got a book coming out, too, in case you haven't seen his many many social media posts about it, which he's not anxious about at all. 

We’re both back from vacation, and Heidi’s dealing with a little bit of a post-vaca existential crisis! Nevertheless, we’re talking about how returning from vacations and settling back into our ordinary lives have changed over the last few years in our increasingly harsh, polarized culture. All this leads us in the direction of how harsh our interactions the people close to us can be sometimes, and how we can all benefit from being a little gentler in our interactions.

This week we're talking about Aziz Ansari's new Netflix special and what we can learn from the way he addressed his own sexual misconduct allegations from last year. 

The huge win of the USA Women's Soccer team has us reeling this week about the value of sports in our kids' lives these days. We get into why you have to take chances and put it all on the line sometimes, learning how to define wins for yourself even if you aren't a natural-born athlete, and even why some kids are choosing to opt out of sports lately - and why they shouldn't!

This week, we're talking about the Parkland shooting survivor who recently had his Harvard offer rescinded after it was discovered that he had made some racist comments, whether such an offense is ever redeemable, and how this ties into race.