The Estradiol Illusions Podcast

Our holiday coverage continues with an ITM personal favorite, and not just because she bore a resemblance to the boy as a young child. The Snowman is a beautifully animated special that tugs at all the right heartstrings. Ian unpacks her relationship to the special and its themes. Note: Ian spends the first five minutes talking about EI's 200th episode milestone. Listeners looking just for Snowman are recommended to skip the first few minutes. Happy holidays everyone! 

We are back in the Rankin/Bass cinematic universe! Rudolph and Frosty's Christmas in July is in many ways a prototype to the Avengers-style team-up modern audiences are used to, a convergence of beloved heroes such as Rudolph, Frosty, Big Ben, Jack Frost, and Mickey Rooney's Santa. It is also a terrible movie, the only feature-length Christmas release in the Rankin/Bass catalogue.   ITM's sister Barbara returns to the show to unpack this trainwreck. Where are Milton's laughs? What's up with the Caves of Lost Rejections? Find out as we take one of our last adventures into this bizarre world. 

It's time for holiday coverage! ITM takes a look at the 1947 classic Miracle on 34th Street and its 1994 remake. While the remake boasts an impressive cast, it's hard to top the magic of the original. ITM examines the peculiarities of the beloved film, particularly its preoccupation with ethical consumption under capitalism and the trial that soaks up much of the narrative.

It's that time again! ITM makes her appeal for you to fill out a ballot. The stakes are too high, something we're used to hearing, but the threat of another four years of Trump is simply unfathomable for our country. Too many people's rights are on the line. The Senate map is very tough for Democrats, and every vote counts.   Please take a moment to check your voter registration status, and be sure to make plans to vote in this election. Thank you.

ITM has a bunch of updates, including a lip implant removal procedure that kept her away from the microphone during Pride Month. It's been a stressful time for many LGBTQ people. Ian shares her own struggles with stress, and talks about her new relationship. It's a weird time to be LGBTQ in the world. It's okay to not be okay 100% of the time (or any of the time). Be good to yourselves, fam.

Her web connects us all! Or does? Absolutely not. Ian is joined by Ed Carroll for a discussion on Sony's Spider-Man Universe's latest disaster. Ian and Ed break down the odd narrative decisions, like the bargain bin Terminator chase to the odd application of clairvoyance powers to the puzzling absence of spider powers in a film with three Spider-Girls/Spider-Women. What a mess!    Disclaimer: Sony sent Ian a copy of the 4K/Blu-ray release for the purposes of recording this episode.  

Ian has a lot of feelings about The Phantom Menace on its 25th birthday. She already wrote an article about the film a few years ago, so naturally her only recourse was to make a podcast film about it. Why do we care about a children's movie that somehow straddles the line mediocre and underrated? I guess you'll have to listen to find out!    Ian's old article on The Phantom Menace (rescued from the Wayback Machine): https://web.archive.org/web/20200408092924/https://fansided.com/2019/12/16/star-wars-phantom-menace-best-prequel/

Five year Estradiol Illusions anniversary! Ian talks about what she's been up to this year, mostly writing and trying to get over yet another breakup. Life is a tricky game. Best to keep a stiff upper lip and get on with things. Thank you to everyone who's listened to the show over the past half-decade! We don't do as many new episodes as we used to, but it's always fun to catch up.  Ian is far more active on her two preferred platforms, Facebook and Threads

ITM just celebrated a three-month anniversary of her new relationship. She's really excited to be in love again. So excited, in fact, that she recorded a whole episode on how her emotions represent the culmination of her whole transgender journey, even years removed from the end of her medical transition. For all the nonsense the world throws at trans people, there's a lot of joy out there too. 

Did The Little Drummer Boy need a sequel? Absolutely not. Is Book II worth watching? Ian unpacks the short film's surprisingly strong anti-capitalist message. For a special that's running on fumes, Aaron's second act is one of the better lesser-tier Rankin/Bass specials.    EI's coverage of the original Little Drummer Boy: https://ianthomasmalone.podbean.com/e/the-little-drummer-boy-1639166205/   EI's full holiday slate: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2023/12/holiday-podcast-rankin-bass-muppets/  

We are continuing our holiday coverage with the 1978 Disney special The Small One, a quietly powerful short little film. A favorite of Ian's from an early age, she gets a little emotional talking about the narrative toward the end of the episode. For all the fun we have joking about all the cringe that often goes into holiday specials, The Small One is among the genre's finest offerings. The Small One is streaming on Disney Plus   Our full holiday slate: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2023/12/holiday-podcast-rankin-bass-muppets/ 

We're back in the Rankin/Bass cinematic universe, covering the 1974 animated special 'Twas the Night Before Christmas. Santa is really angry about an op-ed penned in the local paper by a young mouse who dared not to live his life in service to the altar of faith. The town government is pretty apathetic toward Santa, a proper sentiment for a lackluster special.    EI's full holiday coverage: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2023/12/holiday-podcast-rankin-bass-muppets/

ITM offers a passionate defense of the LGBTQ sensation known as U-Haul. Is it a bad idea to rush into emotional entanglements that make you feel like you're floating on the moon? Hey, if you find something that makes you happy in this modern landscape, roll with it. Life's too short to deny yourself a beautiful U-Haul. 

ITM has had quite the eventful stretch. With someone new in her life, Ian unpacks the nerves and calming effects of being thrown into The Deep End. As scared as she feels, the idea of having something worth feeling anything about is cause enough for celebration. The deep end isn't such a scary place to be as long as someone remembers to throw you a paddle. 

ITM had a magical date last night with a woman. A major recurring theme of this show over the past two years has been ITM's fleeting connection to her bisexuality. Ian unpacks her date and the value of bringing your best, earnest effort to new connections, to throw yourself out there in our vast scary world, eager and ready to savor that precious LGBTQ joy we all hold so dear to ourselves. Maybe she's a little smitten with the sapphic bug, but isn't that the whole point of this thing of ours (bisexual casa nostra)?

We're back! ITM delivers a case against one of her least favorite elements of LGBTQ life, that thing called discretion. A lot of people used to wish that gay people could keep things in the bedroom or the pesky closet. ITM doesn't think that suits an adorable transsexual, and she'd like the era of discretion to come to a much-needed end. 

Against all odds, The Flash movie was finally released. In spite of Ezra Miller's best efforts to shelf the film with their awful behavior, Warner Bros. opted against the Batgirl treatment and set this trainwreck loose in the wild. Ian is joined by friend of the show Ed Carroll for a post-mortem on The Flash, and the DCEU as a whole. At least we got some Keaton, and another beloved DC figure in ITM lore.  For more of Ed, follow him on Twitter @EdRevelator34 Ian's review of the film: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2023/06/the-flash-is-an-embarrassing-mess-fitting-for-the-current-state-of-the-dceu/  

Ian unpacks a question that she was asked by a Grindr date last week. Is there anything wrong with going out with guys who fetishize trans women? Like many trans femmes, ITM is not a fan of being objectified, but she tries her best to unpack the reality of how trans people are seen in this vast dating realm. 

Pride is upon us! It's a pretty shitty time to be a trans person in America. Ian muddles through a deconstruction of the idea of optimism, trying her best to piece together something resembling a life in this chaotic timeline.

Ian returns with a foolish story of how she used to rate suitor's prospects by whether they stayed to watch Mister Rogers' Neighborhood with her in bed the morning after. There's not much point to the episode besides this story that's already been spoiled. She thinks listening to the whole story would be a waste of time and didn't want you to suffer.    Ian's article on Mister Rogers that was referenced in the episode: https://fansided.com/2020/03/20/mister-rogers-neighborhood-legacy/

Estradiol Illusions celebrates its fourth anniversary... a month late. Ian takes a look at trans life nearly a decade in, from the mistakes of her youth to the current heavily anti-trans climate here in the US. She's not really sure why this show has grown in popularity, but she's grateful to have you here. 

ITM spends some time with one of her least favorite subjects, her own gender. Not quite feeling like a woman these days, Ian doesn't really know what that means. Her gender is probably just tired, or hormonal, or hungry. Maybe all three. 

Our holiday coverage concludes with a merger of our pop culture and personal programming. A Charlie Brown Christmas is one of the most perfect holiday specials in existence, but it'll also occupy an odd place in Ian's life. Ian talks about how she watched this special mere minutes before a four-year relationship ended, days before Christmas. Ian really didn't like the idea of such a good special being tied up in trauma, making a vow to reclaim the Peanuts and all their glory. Those efforts ultimately shaped her year of mischief and healing, the promise of Christmas manifested in the heart of a chaotic transsexual.  Enjoy your holidays and have a very happy New Year.

Continuing our Rankin/Bass holiday coverage with what might be their most normal special of them all. Despite its unwieldy title, The First Christmas actually tells a relatively cohesive story, albeit a fairly mundane narrative about a young shepherd who regains his sight through the magic of a Nativity play. Oddly secular given its church setting, The First Christmas is a good case study for how other Rankin/Bass specials might have turned out if they didn't try to pad out their runtimes with bizarre filler. Be sure to check out our other episodes covering the Rankin/Bass cinematic universe! 

Have you ever watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and wondered if all the bullying might be better with a firmer helping of Jesus? That's basically Nestor the Long-Eared Christmas Donkey, a shorter ripoff of Rudolph with a truncated plot and fewer compelling characters. One of the more forgettable entries into the Rankin/Bass canon, Ian struggles to understand the point of this mess. Be sure to check out all of our other holiday episodes, including coverage of most of the Rankin/Bass stop motion specials. 

We are back in the Rankin/Bass cinematic universe with a special that's mostly Christmas adjacent. Jack Frost mostly identifies, for whatever reason, as a Groundhog Day special. Despite its incredibly annoying narrator, Jack Frost stands out as one of the most cohesive holiday specials in the Rankin/Bass canon, a tragic narrative that shines above its abundant filler. Maybe Ian just really likes Jack's sparkly outfit.   Be sure to check out all of our other Rankin/Bass holiday episodes.

We are back in the Rankin/Bass cinematic universe for another December full of overanalyzing bizarre children's television. Santa Claus is Comin' to Town is a fairly straightforward (at least by Rankin/Bass standards) origin story, albeit one that spends a bit too much time explaining every single facet of Claus lore. Ian looks at the special's legacy against some of its popular contemporaries and its peculiar underwhelming third act. Be sure to check out all of our past holiday coverage, including episodes on most of the Rankin/Bass stop-motion specials. 

We're back with an episode on a controversial relationship practice that ITM happens to love. The Irish Goodbye of dating gets a bad rap, but life is not a journey that always requires closure. People come and go in each other's lives all the time, not necessarily for reasons that take things like fault or rejection into the equation. As shitty as ghosting can feel, the alternatives are often far more unpleasant for both the recipient and the executioner.  Christmas coverage will begin in the next few days! Please leave a rating or review for EI on Apple if you enjoy our show. 

Grab your gamma radiation and your law degree, we're doing a whole episode on She-Hulk: Attorney at Law. Ian dives into what she referred to as the MCU's best TV series, examining the mash-up of Ally McBeal with Marvel's established formula. Ian also examines the state of the broader MCU TV affairs, a territory we haven't revisited on EI since WandaVision. The incels may have hated it, but what do they know about comic books anyway?  Ian's written review: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2022/10/she-hulk-attorney-at-law-confidently-grows-into-marvel-studios-best-television-series-to-date/ EI's previous WandaVision review: https://ianthomasmalone.podbean.com/e/wandavision-1615313625/

Another election season is upon us. The Senate hangs in the balance, a 50/50 split that will come down to just a few states. Republicans have put forth morally bankrupt morons such as Herschel Walker and Dr. Crudité Oz for their candidates, threatening to further sully the already rancid cesspool that is our government. Biden isn't a perfect president and the Democrats have left a lot to be desired. That said, there is no comparison with the alternative, and it is our civic duty to try and bludgeon expected GOP gains. Every ballot has candidates on it who can improve your community. Please vote.  Our 2020 Senate episode, where ITM got most of it right: https://ianthomasmalone.podbean.com/e/vote-joe-biden-2020-senate-analysis/

On the eve of Big Brother 24, we are absolutely delighted to welcome Kevin Jacobs, winner of Big Brother Canada 10, to the show. Kevin played a subtlety dominant in the BBCAN house, shaping the trajectory of the game without ever besting a Head of Household competition, becoming the first winner to pull of that feat since the iconic Dr. Will Kirby back in BB2. Kevin shares his extensive knowledge of game theory, navigating the murky waters of the early game to survive a week one eviction, steering clear of the carnage wrought by BBCAN10's multiple seven-person alliances, and forging the Crash Test Dummies alliance that took center stage down the stretch. Ian throws in some Kant for good measure. Past seasons of Big Brother Canada are available on Paramount+. Canadian viewers or viewers with one of those things called a VPN can get a taste of the delicious BBCAN10 action at https://www.bigbrothercanada.ca/  You can follow Kevin on Twitter @KevinTedJacobs or Instagram @kevintedjacobs

Another vagina-themed episode! ITM talks about the current state of her downstairs equipment since her service on the Tinder front lines. Things on the home front are looking in tip top shape, validating her semi-problematic assertion that the best gender affirmation comes through others, coming into you. She may not be the woman America wants, but ITM is committed to being the champion our country desperately needs. Ian's debut comedy album Confessions from My New Vagina is streaming wherever you get your music. 

It's Pride Month, which comes with the obligatory discourse on kink at Pride (absolutely, which we covered in last year's episode on Bloodsisters), cops at Pride (absolutely not, ACAB for life), and the concept known as "bi-erasure." As a person who uses gay, straight, and bi all interchangeably, ITM has some unique perspectives on this tedious discourse. A staunch opponent of gatekeeping, she questions the very notion of a hierarchy within our letters LGBTQ. Long story short for those who don't want to commit to the episode: never let your own identity or sense of self be defined by someone else. You are bi enough. 

ITM continues her dating & sexuality commentary with an episode on The Gauntlet, her rubric for deciding whether to go out with a potential suitor. Often deemed a person with unattainable standards, ITM feels it's all pretty basic stuff like not being a creep, overly sexual, or assuming that a simple swipe to the right is all you need for a ticket to ride.  Here is a picture of the show notes, if you can read Ian's handwriting. Pretty simple rules to live by!   

ITM loves Tinder, a dream come true for a liberated transsexual as the dawn of hot girl summer lies ahead. Tinder is full of beautiful people of many genders, but it's also a place where boring fuckboys come for their pound of flesh. Ian unpacks the most tedious opening of them all, the "how are you" maneuver farted into the void to deflect the burden of courtship. Casual relationships need not be meaningless interactions, an important reminder to view yourself as the catch that you are. If you enjoy Estradiol Illusions, please consider leaving a review wherever you get your podcasts. 

We are delighted to welcome Jay Northcott to discuss their time in the Big Brother Canada house. Jay is a nonbinary theatre director and drag performer based in Toronto, who made quite the impression ahead of their week two eviction, setting the stage for the epic week three house flip that shook up the entire game. Jay shares so many fascinating insights into the gameplay, as well as the unique challenges presented to LGBTQ houseguests. Ian & Jay talk quite a bit about the season as a whole, one of the all-time greats for BB North America. You can follow Jay on Instagram @jaythemcott and on Twitter @jaythemcott Be sure to check out our prior BB CAN 10 coverage, including an interview with Kyle Moore. Photo courtesy of Big Brother Canada & Global Television Network

We're back at Downton for an episode on the new film Downton Abbey: A New Era. Ian was unfortunately not a big fan of the movie, with its excessive subplots and bizarre adventure to the south of France, though she did enjoy the plot set at Downton and the newcomers. Ian does her best to untangle the messy web of the film, providing analysis for how it fell short of the first feature.   Ian's review of the film: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2022/05/downton-abbey-a-new-era-is-too-stuck-in-the-past/ Previous episode on the first film: https://ianthomasmalone.podbean.com/e/downton-abbey-1569517256/ Episode all about Thomas Barrow: https://ianthomasmalone.podbean.com/e/downton-abbey-character-study-thomas-barrow/

An episode all about Ian's jumbled-up bisexuality, colloquially known as the leg hair spectrum (masculine of Ian's not too feminine center). Ian talks about what bisexuality means to her, how no one else can define your own sexuality, and how it's perfectly okay to "pick sides" in the sexuality equation. Ian just mostly wishes she wasn't 90% heterosexual, but who would really choose to be attracted to men anyway? 

An episode all about dating apps! ITM shares her experiences as a single trans woman, navigating the complex webs of cis men, polyamory, T4T, and all the other fun stuff Los Angeles has to offer. Whatever you're looking for, it's important to make sure you're holding yourself, and your potential romantic partners, to standards that fulfill your needs.

We are absolutely delighted to welcome Kyle Moore to the show. Kyle's Head of Household reign in week three of Big Brother Canada 10 will go down as one of the most exciting in BB history, a botched backdoor attempt on Josh Nash that resulted in an epic house flip. Kyle found himself evicted by key ally Steven "Gino" Giannopolous in a similar backdoor effort the following week. Kyle talks about his experiences in the game and his thought process during his time as HoH, an extensive perspective on the challenges of strategizing within the BB CAN house. Ian & Kyle also talk about mental health and how mindfulness plays into the rigors of the game. TTTE fans will also enjoy a Theodore Tugboat reference at the end of the episode, a beloved figure in Kyle's native Halifax. Ian's article on BB CAN, which has a heavy emphasis on Kyle's HoH week: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2022/03/big-brother-canada-is-the-best-reality-show-on-television-right-now/ Kyle hosts the Life's a Wreck Podcast, which focuses on mental health. You can check out Life's a Wreck here or wherever you get your podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/lifes-a-wreck/id1471732336 Kyle also has a clothing line, Better Tømørrøw, which he wore many times throughout his tenure in the BB CAN house. You can pick up your own Kyle merch at: https://www.bettertomorrow.world/  Headshots courtesy of Kyle Moore Production still courtesy of Big Brother Canada & Global Television Network  

We are delighted to welcome Lila Schmitz to talk about her new documentary The Job of Songs, a delightful film centered on the music scene in Doolin, Ireland. Ian & Lila talk about the power of music in communities, mental health, travel culture, open communication, and so much more! Lots of laughter as ITM shakes off the interview rust.  The Job of Songs premiered at DOC NYC 2021 and will be having its wide release later this year. To learn more, please visit https://thejobofsongs.com/home  Ian's review of the film: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2022/03/the-job-of-songs-makes-the-case-for-good-old-fashioned-human-connection/    

The day has finally arrived. ITM the bisexual is learning more and more that she's probably more like ITM the heterosexual. Yuck. Boys are gross, and most of them tend not to want to date trans women named Ian Thomas. Again, yuck, but here we are. Ian does her best to unpack the mess that is her dating life, being confronted with the realities of modern romance and the ways her identity comes into conflict with our swipe left/right binary. Bit of a struggle! You've been warned.    

Grab your porgs and your blue milk! The Last Jedi is a bit of a polarizing film, to say the least. Rian Johnson brought plenty of fascinating ideas to the sequel trilogy's middle entry, its best by a mile. Ian talks about what she liked about the film, what she would have changed, and the characterization of Luke Skywalker, diving a bit into Luke's appearances in The Mandalorian and The Book of Boba Fett. Ian's original 2017 review of the film: https://ianthomasmalone.com/2017/12/the-last-jedi-offers-aimless-entertainment/ Ian's write up of The Phantom Menace that is mentioned in the episode: https://fansided.com/2019/12/16/star-wars-phantom-menace-best-prequel/  

We're back! ITM talks about some personal news that rocked her post-Rankin/Bass holiday festivities. Breakups are terrible. Transgender people can go through much of our lives thinking we're unlovable, which certainly does not reflect reality. ITM offers some reflections that might be useful for trans or cis people in similar boats. There's always a new adventure on the horizon, as long as you keep throwing yourself out there. Episode image is a picture taken two days after the bombshell news. 

Our journey into the Rankin/Bass cinematic universe continues with the 1985 special The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus their final production to use traditional stop-motion animation. Based on L. Frank Baum's 1902 novel of the same name, the film is a pretty bizarre Santa origin story that often feels more like a riff on The Lord of the Rings than holiday entertainment. Despite it's weirdly complex narrative and confusing characters, the special is a ton of fun to watch, even if it delivers a much weirder brand of festive cheer. This is almost certainly our final holiday episode of the season. Be sure to check out all of our Christmas coverage from 2020 & 2021. From all of us at Estradiol Illusions, we wish you a very pleasant holiday season and thank you for spending a bit of it with us. 

Our holiday coverage continues with A Mister Brothers' Christmas, the 2008 follow-up to the 1974 gem The Year Without a Santa Claus. Featuring returning voices Mickey Rooney and George S. Irving as Santa Claus and Heat Miser, the film aims to recapture the magic of the Rankin/Bass stop-motion classics. Unfortunately, the film never quite comes together as anything more than a nostalgia production with some truly horrendous music. Ian does her best to unpack what went wrong and why she's still happy that it exists.

We're back in the Muppets Extended Universe with the 2002 television film It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie. With a plot that's strikingly similar to the 2011 cinematic film The Muppets, adult-themed humor, and some uneven celebrity cameos from NBC Universal properties, the film occupies a weird place in Muppets lore. A strong performance from Joan Cusack goes a long way toward buoying a production perhaps best known for suggesting that Kermit's existence played a role in one of the defining tragedies of the 21st century. Be sure to check out all of EI's holiday coverage! 

Into the weeds of the Rankin/Bass holiday catalog! Pinocchio's Christmas is a bizarre special, serving as both an adaption of the 1883 novel and a more traditional Santa-infused holiday narrative. There is a lot going on, with multiple villains and plotlines converging on the poor wooden boy. Ian does her best to unpack it all.   Be sure to check out all of our holiday-themed episodes!

We are continuing our Rankin/Bass coverage with the 1968 classic The Little Drummer Boy. Aaron starts off our story as a misanthropic troubadour performing for an audience of none, only to be changed by the healing power of laughter after pounding his drum until a newborn baby saved his lamb. Ian isn't sure what to make of her affection for Ben Haramad, the closest thing the special has to a villain who isn't driving a chariot in the middle of the night.   Be sure to check out all of our holiday-themed episodes!

Holiday coverage continues! Join Ian as she unpacks the trainwreck known as Rudolph's Shiny New Year, where everyone's favorite bullied reindeer is tasked with saving time itself. From the Archipelago of Last Years to Eon the Terrible, nothing here makes any sense. The people in power continue to pick on young children, presenting the sensible question of whether time should be saved. Be sure to check out our episode from last year covering the original Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer special: https://ianthomasmalone.podbean.com/e/rudolph-a-transgender-perspective/

Our holiday coverage continues! Ian & Tara talk about the 2008 TV special, A Muppet Christmas: Letters to Santa, currently available on Disney+. With strong writing, music from The Muppet Christmas Carol lyricist Paul Williams, and fun celebrity cameos from Uma Thurman, Jesse L. Martin, Whoopi Goldberg, and Nathan Lane, Letters to Santa is a very entertaining way to get into the Christmas spirit.  Be sure to check out all of our holiday-themed episodes! If you've enjoyed EI this year, please consider leaving us a review.