NO WAY! Two Guys Stories - Hosted by Jim and Paul!

Hop on board today as we take you cruising on our boating trips. Have you ever been stranded in a lake after your engine dies? Or have you ever been on a cruise ship where a fellow passenger died? Sail with us and laugh heartily at our boating stories. But before we leave the dock, we wil l mix you up one of our most interesting Drink-Of-The-Week, The Life Raft!

Today's podcast we share our That's Not What I Expected Stories. Ever have to visit two websites and three stores to buy a bedroom tableside alarm clock? How many times have you bought items that turn out to be defective or have missing parts. If you play golf, has the starter ever warned you that the two guys that tee of behind you also have two escorts with them? Mix up our complex tasting Drink-Of-The-Week - This Is Not What I Wanted Smoked Old Fashioned Mocktail and laugh at our escapades!

Remember life before cell phones? Stopping at payphones to make a phone call…do you have enough quarters? Or did you use your AT&T calling card? Was the only phone you grew up with located in the kitchen with a 40-foot cord? There was no phone privacy back then. Who had a bag phone-the pre-curser to the cell phone? Did your boss used to contact you via the company pager device? Join us as we share our Life Before Cell Phones stories. Before you do, be sure to complete that last payphone call and mix up our curiously delicious Drink-OF-The-Week: The Autodial.

Have you ever had any strange or unusual things happen int he waiting room at a medical center or a car repair service or in an airline's sky club. Perhaps you had to listen to somebody's tale of woe. Or did you see somebody clipping their nails? Join us as we share our hilarious waiting room stories and mix up our Drink-Of-The-Week, Eavesdropper! 

Do you enjoy going on vacation? Or have you experienced some vacation mishaps? Have you ever stopped for gas on vacation and after departing, discover your wallet is missing? Have you ever had to scour the bottom of a pool for contact lenses with a borrowed mask because your wife opened her eyes underwater? We're sure you will laugh at our vacation mishaps. And be sure to  mix up our Drink-Of-The-Week - Jim's Hula Special Mai Tai - to get you in vacation mode!

Loyal Listenters - we celbrate our 90th podcast and many thanks for your support! Today, we share our hilarious pub crawl stories. Ever do a pub crawl riding a tandem bike? Hav eyou ever been stranded on an island because you were having too much fun on a pub crawl? Mix up our Drink-Of-The-Week, Three Wiseguys and a Wiseman and laugh at our pub crawl stories!

Are you a Do It Yourself person? If so, have you evercut off the tip of your finger twice doing DIY projects? While doing a DIY projects, hoow many trips do you end of making to the hardware store? Do you find that duct tape is one of your best DIY tools? Mix up our Drink-Of-The Week - The Fixer Upper and laugh with us at our DIY escapades. 

Do you like shoveling snow? Do you own a snowblower or do you have a snow removal service? Do you wish your neighbor would shovel your sidewalk? Have you ever clogged your snowblower with a newapaper? How mad do you get when the city snowplow block up the end of your driveway with snow and ice? Join us as we share our snow removal stories. And when you are done snow shoveling, mix up our Drink-Of-The-Week, A Flaming Snow Drift! 

When is the last time you cleaned out all the junk in your house or basement? Ever see your garbage collection people inspect your junk before they throw it in the garbage truck? have you ever watched to see if your garbage people take all the junk you threw out that week? If you have a cleaning service at your house, do you clean before the cleaning service arrives? Mix up our Drink of The Week - The Household Cleaner - and enjoy our throwing out junk stories!

Today's podcast we share our college party stories with our special guests, John and Bryan. Bryan works for Buffalo Trace in sales and marketing and is an expert in bourbon tastings. So today, you will here our hilarious college party stories. And as a bonus, Bryan conducts a bourbon tasting with us.  So settle in, pour your self at Buffalo Trace and enjoy our podcast!

Can you believe it is already Christmas Eve? Are you ready for unseen circumstances? Have you ever watched your Christmas tree slowly fall over and not done anything to stop it? Ha a chipmunk ever invited itself to your family Christmas party? How many times have you put up your Christmas lights only to find they don't work the next night? Celebrate our Christmas stories with our Yule concocted beverage, The Kris Kringle, a delicious beverage that has the color of the holiday!   

Our podcast today Boom Boomer..Out Go The Lights, we explore the Baby Boomer experience along with our special millenial guests, Steph and Mary. Do your children get frustrated with your inability use your phone and computer? Do you send memes to more people than you should? Do you post too much information on Facebook? If so you may be entitled to compenstation or a Baby Boomer! Mix up our Drink Of The Week, a Next Generation and laugh with us as we Boomers get schooled by our Millenial guests. 

Remember the food you loved as a kid? Do you still eat that now? What foods do you eat now that you never ate as a kid? Explore this food mystery with us and partake in our delicious Drink-Of-The-Week, "You'll Drink It And Like It" while you ponder the mystery of foods now and then!

Imagine, if you will and enjoy our hypothetical situation podcast where stange and unusual things happen. While changing your car battery, did you end up welding a wrench to your watchband? Do you have friends, that like to test the limits of the car fuel tank to see how far they can travel on empty? These are just a sample of our hypothetical situation podcast. So mix up our Drink-Of-The-Week, The Conundrum and ponder our hypothetical situations..

Did you ever enter into a subscription relationship with an 8-track, cassette tape, or record company? Remeber the excitement of getting 12 tapes or albums for a penny? But wait! Now the subscription kicks in and you are getting non-stop tapes and records you don't want! Mix up our Drinl-Of-The-Week, The Subscription and laugh with us on our subscription and rebate stories!

Have you ever gone camping with friends, only to be abandoned in the woods? What would you do to survive? Do you have the wilderness survival skills to live in the woods? Today, we share Bob's adventure of wilderness survival, after being abandonded in our Season 1 Espisode 2, The Great Outdoors! We seem to have left poor Bob out there somewhere when we were mixing the drink of the week, never to be heard from again until TODAY! Get your directions out of the woods with our Drink-Of-The-Week - The Compass! And marvel how Bob successfully survives his ordeal!

Today we share our crrazy trail running stories! Have you ever been tricked into running a team trail race and find yourself climbing up a muddy riverbank then running through a hot and humid cornfield? Ever run into a rattlesnake on a trail run? Mix up our earthy elixir, The Happy Hiker - and laugh at our crazy trail running antics!

Today, we talk experiences we would rather not talk about! Ever fail your driver's ed road test? How were your grades at college your freshman year? Ever hit your uncle with a golf cart? Mix up our delicious Drink Of The Week - Use the Fifth - and laugh at our stories. We really don't want to talk about this.....

Today is all about our fun food stories. From growing up around the family dinner table, to the strangest foods we have ever eaten. Ever eat scorpions? How about muskrat or frog legs? Remember eating frozen TV dinners? What was your favorite - the Salisbury Steak or Pork Loin? And after dinner, please mix up our delicious desert drink of the week - The Chocolate Eclair and laugh at our fun food stories!

Today we explore sifferent things to do durin the hot month of August. Ever start your neighbor's trees on fire? Or did you ever go river tubing with Godzilla? Ever been at a friends house and he starts chasing you  around with a sword? Laugh with us at our hot August stories and mix up our Drink-Of-The-Week - a Hot August Night and enjoy!

Today, we are excited to share our 75th podcast with you! Thank to all of our loyal listener's for supporting us. To date, we have listener's from all 5 continents except Antartica! Our 75th podcast is about vending machines.  Ever get a cold beer out of a Coke vending machine? Do you think there was a vending machine that dispensed holy water? Or that there is a live crab vending machine is China or Japan? Mix up our Drink-Of-The-Week, A Cavalier and enjoy our vending machine show! Please note that this and all future Podcasts will be available on Tuesdays at 6 am.   

Today we share our summer vacation stories with a very refreshing drink of the week! Ever go on a vacation to a relative's house and they give you a 50lb bag of potatoes as a parting gift?On your on vacation did you ever open an umbrella in the car and thought you invented cheese bread? Mix up our Drink if the Week - A Lakeside Lounger and laugh at our summer vacation stories!

Ever try to teach your kids how to swim and you can't swim? When you were a kid, did you ever ride your bikes to local motels to go swimming in their pools? When you go on family vacations, don't you find that the kids favorit thing to do is to go swimming? Mix up our refreshing Drink Of The Week, The Swimming Hole and relax in a lounger by the pool to watch the kids swim!

Do you remember your first bike? Do you ever ride your bike into a pool when you were learning to ride? Did you learn to ride a bike with a training wheel on one side? Did you ever try to repair a flat tire on your bike? Laugh with us on our bike stories while you enjoy our Drink Of The Week - a Flat Tire! 

Do you enjoy summer grilling? Have you ever set your house on fire while cooking on the outdoor grill? Do you use more lighter fluid than you should to start your outdoor grill? Have you cooked elk on your grill? Mix up our Drink of the Week - Charcoal Starter - to guarantee and excellent grilling experience!

Tonight we are talking trash. You know, garbage, refuse, recyclables. Do you remember burning your trash? Have you ever put old items like patio furniture for pick up only to discover trash pickers took them and left behind stuff they did not want? Put a fresh garbage bag in your trash receptacle and mix up our Drink Of The Week - The Trashcan. Sip it and you  might learn who invented the plastic garbage bag!!

It's Spring - time to get out all your lawn and yard maintenance equipment. Do you like mowing your lawn? Do you have a gas powered lawn edger? Have you ever cut your lawn in barefeet? Join us as we plant more grass seed and pray to the lawn gods it sprouts. And while we're waiting for the seed to sprout - lets mix up the refreshing drink of the week - a Hedgetrimmer! 

Do you have a nickname? Do you enjoy giving other people nicknames? Do many of your friends and family have nicknames? Tonight we have some fun with nicknames : including friends, family and college sports team names. Mix up our refreshing non-alcholic Drink Of The Week - The Nick-NA-me! Enjoy the podcast! After the podcast, give somebody a nickname, even if it your pet gerbil!

We're sure all of you have experienced many different types of neighbors. Our episode tonight is focussed on nutty neighbors. Ever have a neighbor wear a tu-tu and a kilt and play bongos at all hours of the night? How about those neighbors that take all day to mow their lawn? Ever have a neighbor rake the leaves off the house and trees in their yard? Mix up our Drink-of-the Week, "The Nutty Neighbor" and laugh with us on our Nutty Neighbor Podcast! You'll probably wan to put up a fence after listening! 

Ever listen to songs and not totally understand what the lyrics say? Maybe you've listented to the Rolling Stone's song Beast of Burden only to hear "I'll never leave your pizza burning." Or perhaps the Eagle's Hotel Cailfornia when you hear " On a dark desert highway , cool whip in my hair". Laugh with us as we share our misheard lyric songs and sip on our drink of the week - The Twisted Lyric! So put on your albums, casettes, 8-tracks, cds and listen and give us a 5 star rating! 

Get ready to go out with us as we share our bar stories. Ever taken you mom to dinner only to have somebody sitting near you ask if you two are on a date? Has a bartender ever said to you "I'll bet your were hot when you were thirty years old". Have you ever sat down at the bar and the bartender asks if you would like to sample some different gin samples for free? Pour our drink of the week - The Bar Crawler, and laugh with us as we complete our bar crawl!

Tonight, we share our techincal difficulty stories. Ever have parts left over after building your new furniture? Have you ever ants attack your gaming station? Did you know lint can block your phones charging port? And how many of you have experienced the "Blue Screen Of Death"? Pour yourself our drink of the week - A Blue Screen of Death Cocktail and laugh at our techincal difficulty stories. 

Ever come back to your office after traveling for business to discover your desk is gone? Do you work in an office? Do you enjoy interacting with all the diffferent personalities in the office? Do you like going to training meetings and doing breakout sessions? Join us as we share our funny office stories. And of course please try our drink of the week - 9 to 5. Don't forget to give us a 5 star rating when you've punched out for the day! 

Do you enjoy winter driving? Tonight we share our wintery driving tales. Ever drive in icy conditions and watch drivers speeding by you and sliding into the ditch? Did you teach your kids how to do donuts in snowy parking lots and show them how to correctly steer and straighten out the car? Or ever hae a chipmunk chew through your windshield washer lines? Slide into our drink of the week - Windshield Wiper Fluid! And make sure your vehicle's windshield washer reservoir is filled! Dont forget to give us a 5 star rating after you've filler your tank with the drink of the week!

Do you enjoy vacuuming up the needles that drop off your Christmas Tree? Do you take down your Christmas decorations and throw them in a box, or do you have a planned, organized process to pack your decorations and lights? Today, we share our taking down Christmas tree and decoration stories. Laugh with us and sip on our beautiful green drink of the week - The Green Devil! Don't forget to give us a 5 star rating after you've had a laugh and a drink or two!

Did your parents encourage your belief in Santa Claus? Did they stamp reindeer hooves in the snow? Did they smear soot foot prints where Santa could have come down the chimney? Our special guest, Jim's daughter Stephanie, shares her memories of Santa Claus and how her parents made Santa very believeable. Sip our Drink Of The Week - Kris Kringle - an original drink crafted by Stephanie. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all of our podcast listeners! 

Do you enjoy putting up your Christmas lights? How much time do you spend untangling your strings of lights? Ever put up your lights and plug them in and half of the string doesn't light up. Rock with us on our crazy Christmas lights stories and sip our drink-of-the week, a C-9! Don't forget to give us a great rating after un-tangling your lights!

Tonight we share our funny high school hi-jinks stories. Ever kidnap a Big Boy restaurant statue and put it on your high school roof? Ever have your friend pull a rope and have all the stage lights for high school commencement come crashing down behind the stage? Pop open our drink of the week, a cold Old Style or Hamms Beer, and laugh with us on our high school hi-jinks stories!

Hard to believe Thanksgiving Holiday is just a couple weeks away. Have you ever celebrated Thanksgiving dinner in a tent? Or did you ever have your family welcome in a stranger every year for a turkey dinner? Join us with our delicious Thanksgiving stories and make sure to mix up our drink of the week - the Turkey Suprise. Don't forget to give us turkey's a 5 star rating after you've enjoyed your meal and the podcast. 

In tonight's episode, we share our spooky and haunting Devil's Night and Halloween stories. On Devil's Night, did you ring door bells and run, toss dummies in front of cars, or TP trees? While trick-or-treating, did you ever get a toothbrush? How happy were you when you got a full size candy bar? You'll be hauntingly happy listening to our spooky stories while sipping on our Halloween drink - A Transylvaina Transfusion! Make sure to give us a 5 star rating after your transfusion!

Today, join us as we share our memorable birthday party stories. Ever been late to your own surprise birthday party? Did you ever host a surprose birthday party and it was not a surprise? Or did your wife ever invite motor city mama to your birthday party? Plenty of funny birthday stories to laugh at while sipping our drink of the week, - the Birthday Candle! Mske sure to give us a 5 star rating after you've tipped the birthday candle once or twice. Make sure to blow it out before the first sip!

Are you a runner? What is your favorite race distance? Do you run with toilet paper in your pocket? Join us as we share our funny running stories from high school to now. And after you finish your run, replenish your fluids with our drink of the week - Rum Runner Dunner! Don't forget to give us a five star rating after you cross the finish line!

Ever have a bad experience at a tailgate party? Did you ever have somebody break your car windows while attending a football game? Laugh with us about our football and tailgating escapades. And our drink of the week - The Touchdown - will surely be a score for you! Be sure to give us a five star rating after your touchdown cocktail. You can keep the 2 points!

Ever live in a motel while going to college? How much money did you or your parents spend moving you or your kids into college? Join us and laugh with us with our back to school stories..and of course, enjoy our stories with our drink of the week - The Teacher's Pet! Make sure you give us a 5 star review when you're done lauging and enjoying your second Teacher's Pet!

Tonight we celebrate our 50th podcast - Fabulous Fifty - our golden jubilee podcast! We want to thank all of our loyal podcast listeners for supporting us. Our podcast audience is four continents, 27 countries, and 34 US states. We also have some fun with 50th anniversary milestones such as the band AC-DC, the movie The Exorcist and McDonalds Quarter Pounder.  So settle in with our Drink of The Week - The Golden Jubilee and celebrate with us our 50th Podcast!

Tonight, we share our funny wedding stories. Ever have the person officiating your wedding pull out two weeks before your wedding date? Or did your friends steal the champagne from the bride and groom head table? Or how about grandma chugging down a half glass of Jameson as a family shot? Laugh with us and enjoy our drink of the week - A Painkiller - a popular wedding drink - at least in our families! Listen and enjoy and don't forget to give us a five star rating after you've had a few laughs and a couple of pain killers!

Remember all the fun stuff you did during summertime? Like going to concerts or camping?  Everr been in a water ballon fight? Or how about piercing your foot playing metal Jarts? Remember playing kick the can until dark? Join us as we relive our summer daze starting with Summer Solstice..the day with the most daylight of the year! Mix up our drink of the week - a Summer Solstice - to enjoy as you listen to our latest escapades.  Don't forget to give us a 5 star rating after a couple of Summer Solstices. They'll make you laugh much harder!

While trees are beautiful, just like nature, they have unwanted side effects. Every spring, you attecked by fuzzies, seeds, helicopters, pollen, needles, bark and branches. It's all we can do to keep up with nature's attack. Join us as we share our tree droppings stories. Be sure to mix up our drink of the week - A Sticky Mess - and enjoy our 47th podcast. Don't forget to give us a 5 star rating after you've cleaned up your patio and sidewalk from the garbage from the sky!

Today's podcast features us along with our special guest, Kevin. Laugh with us as Kevin shares his stories about his first business venture - selling beer on a golf course when he was 11! And enjoy our refreshing drink of the week - A John Palmer! Make sure to give us a 5 star rating after you've consumed your John Palmer! Fore!

Tonight, we share our stories about nicknames! Did you have a nickname growing up? Or did you ever give anybody a nickname? Enjoy our 46th podcast with our drink of the week - A Drink With No Name! And again, please give us a 5 star rating after you've had some silly laughs about your friends and families nicknames!

Do you enjoy driving? Ever been in a car accident? Have you ever had your wheel fall off while driving your car? We have lots of fun driving stories to share with you. And, of course, we encourage you to laugh with us while sipping on our drink of the week - The Loose Lug Nut! So tighten your lug nuts and enjoy and make sure you give us a 5 star rating after you've parked your vehicle!