RelationshipAlkemy

Have you ever felt blindsided when someone (your partner or a family member) insists they know how you're feeling? It's not just annoying—it's a connection killer. But why does it happen, and how can we turn these moments into opportunities for deeper connection? In this episode, you'll learn: The golden rule of emotional connection (hint: it's all about the question mark).How to respond when someone tells you how you feel—without flipping the table.The tools you need to improve emotional literacy and foster true intimacy. If you've ever said, “Stop telling me how I feel!” or felt misunderstood, this episode will change how you communicate forever.

Have you ever thought, “Can I really trust and rely on my partner?” “How can I avoid being let down again?” or “Why is my partner mad at me, even though I have the best intentions?” These are questions that come up often in my relationship & intimacy coaching practice—so if they resonate with you, trust me, you're not alone. In this episode, I tackle the big questions: Where does trust come from, and why is it so hard to rebuild?Why do we trust some people instinctively but doubt others?If you've ever receive complaints about your possible lack of reliability, what can you do to change that? This isn't just theory—it's practical. I'll walk you through the #1 practice that changed my entire understanding of trust and reliability. If you've ever heard complaints about not showing up or dropping the ball, this episode might just change your life.

Is It Anger… or Just a Boundary Problem? This week, Olivier tackles the fine line between anger and frustration—and how setting boundaries can be your ultimate power move.

Ever feel like your emotions and logic are battling it out? Turns out, your brain isn't just one big blob of genius—it's actually FOUR brains working (or not working) together! In this episode, Olivier dives into Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor's Whole Brain Living to explore: Why you have TWO emotional brains and TWO thinking brainsHow understanding them can transform your relationshipsWhy your brain might be sabotaging your intimacy (and how to fix it) Whether you're a Type-A planner, a dreamy creative, or both, this episode will help you tune into the different voices in your head—and use them to strengthen your connections.

Why the F*ck Are We Here?

How to get soul-fulfilling intimacy, while balancing young kids and a high-flying career …Even if you're separated, or your partner is reluctant.

We're back folks after doing a little bit of research and our newest conclusion is that slow sex is the BEST sex ever! I know I know, slow sex?! Who would have thought? Join us on this broadcast as we share all our juicy research and we deep dive into the science behind slow sex! We'll also go over some practical tips to slowing down in the bedroom and why slow sex can be even more delicious and fulfilling that your average run of the mill rump in the sheets. Our method can provide a profound life-changing intimacy breakthrough, but it's not for everybody. Which is why we spend time first understanding each person's values, wants and needs before even talking about enrolling in our program. Reach out to us here to get your free ebooks and request a free zero pressure 15-min phone consultation: https://m.me/olivier.bessaignet.14

If you're anything like us, there's one thing you absolutely must have before you can even THINK about getting down and dirty in the bedroom. Emotional Intimacy! Emotional Intimacy is what lays the foundation and creates safety for our connection with each other. There's nothing like feeling seen, heard, and understood that allows for trust to be built and intimacy to bloom. ✅ Mastering Emotional Literacy is like having a superpower for resolving triggers and conflicts, dissolving power struggles, placing healthy boundaries, and cultivating deeper intimacy. ✅ Lack of emotional relating is the #1 complaint we receive from couples beyond the honeymoon phase. Lacking this easily learnable skill is what can break any relationship, no matter how much love and commitment are present.

How comfortable are you with talking about sex with your partner? Do you share your desires, frustrations, fantasies, and hangups? Are you craving more sexual intimacy in your relationship? After the honeymoon phase wears off we're often left with desires for “how it used to be”. You know, that feeling of giddiness when everything was exciting and new and sex was abundant. Join us on this episode as we share our blueprint for spicy sex talks and juicy intimacy and how we apply it in our relationship. We'll share 3 practical tools that we practice in our relationship to help you get down and dirty with your partner tonight as well as communication tips to help keep the flame hot and spicy! Check out all past episodes here: https://relationshipalkemy.com/category/podcast/

By nature, intimate relationships bring all our stuff to the surface, including any unresolved trauma. Until each partner heal their trauma, they're doomed to project their fears and negative beliefs unto each other. Discover how to heal your trauma without overwhelming your nervous system. https://relationshipalkemy.com/category/podcast/

What is Sacred Spot Massage and why do Tantrikas always talk about it?! Join us as we discuss all things about Sacred Spot Massage, like why its so important and just exactly what it is. Together we'll get into the nitty gritty on how it can benefit all people in their sexual healing journey. And Jordan will tell the story of her transformational journey from inorgasmic to female ejaculation. Links mentioned during the call: Upcoming Sacred Spot Massage Retreat for CouplesPrevious podcast episode: The 4 Neural Pathways to Access Altered States of Orgasm

Are we talking about going to a frozen yogurt shop? What do we mean when we say “swirly cosmic fusion”?  Join us on this podcast as we talk about how centering our sexuality in our relationship has brought us immense joy, peace, and satisfaction. Learn three ways to infuse your sacred union with more bliss and juiciness today.

How much should you tell your partner? Should you tell them everything? Or are there things you should never share? What if they respond with defensiveness, judgments or dismissal? What makes it safe to share more of yourself? Intimacy is all about feeling reassured that we are loved and accepted for who we are. In this podcast episode we dive deep into what the microscopic truth is, how sharing your truth with someone can actually be more connecting, and we share practical tools and stories from our personal journey to help you decide for yourself the type of intimate relationship you want. Join us as we get into the microscopic truth! Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

How do female cycles affect intimate relationship dynamics? How can we honor and respect the ancient wisdom and the natural cycles of the female body and integrate that embodiment into our modern masculine-driven western society? Kayla Alexander offers workshops on reclaiming the cyclical wisdom of the female body. She involves cultivating relationships with the natural living world i.e. the elements, with plants, and with our own unique ancestry.  Kayla has spent the last 8 years exploring and understanding her own body and how her cycles impact every other aspect of her life. She has taken a deep dive into exploring both somatic and spiritual traditions such as yoga, Vidanta, meditation, Tantra, organic farming, and circle work. In this episode we explore the 4 primary phases of the female cycle and how it can impact the dynamics of your intimate relationship. Resources mentioned in this episode: Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni WeschlerWomancode or In the Flo from Alisa Vitti Visit Kayla's website here and follow her on Instagram @daughterofwater_

Have you ever dreamed of being with multiple partners simultaneously? Polyamory is supposed to bring more love to our relationships. So why does it often turn into the nightmare of polyagony? In this episode we explore the different styles of polyamory, we reflect on Jessica Fern's book Polysecure, and we share our personal stories of polyamorous relationships.  Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

We did not expect this episode to become so personal and emotional as it turned into a live couple's coaching session… Katrina Vaillancourt is a relationship coach and a master at empathy. She has created a card game to practice empathy with yourself or with your partner so you can use empathy when challenging situations arise. What is empathy? Why is it so important? And how can you use empathy to come back to connection fast, even if you have strong disagreements with your partner? This is what you'll learn in this episode as Katrina shares the moving story of how she came up with this card game of empathy and saved her relationship with her 9-year-old son. Listen as she coaches us live on practicing empathy to stay connected through difficult times. Get Katrina's Empathy card game here: https://www.lovesmartcards.com

Today we have such a juicy topic with a sexy presenter… let's talk about sex and expanding pleasure! What if you could unlock your unrealized potential and access altered states of orgasms? Leah Piper is a Tantra teacher and a sex geek. She combines her 20-year experience of Tantra with the latest scientific research to refine the female pleasure map. In this episode, you will learn about: Why your brain is your biggest sex organThe 4 major neural pathways all women can have access toThe clitoral orgasmThe vaginal orgasmThe difference between the G-Spot and the Sacred SpotUnderstanding Amrita, squirting and female ejaculationWhat to think about anal exploration If you enjoyed Leah's talk, follow her and get her free video training on “Never Miss another clitoral orgasm again!” here: https://www.moreloveworks.com/free-gift

If you experienced attachment wounds in your early childhood, chances are you may be playing them out in your present relationships. What happened to you when you were young is not your fault. But, if you want to get out of self-sabotaging patterns, it's important that you become aware of how early attachment wounds can influence your relationship dynamics. The Attachment Theory has become the center of modern therapy modalities. Here are the 4 attachment styles: Secure AttachmentAvoidant AttachmentAnxious AttachmentDisorganized Attachment In this episode, we share some personal examples to illustrate this theory and help you better relate to this concept. Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

What does the Patriarchy have to do with Intimate Relationships? That's the question we asked Nicky Dyal, an expert and coach on Detoxing from the Patriarchy. She has a very practical handout you can read called “301 Tip-Offs to Spot Patriarchy and Toxic Masculinity in Action”. The handout is divided in 3 sections: When Toxic Masculinity is ExternalizedWhen Toxic Masculinity is InternalizedReactions and Ways of Avoiding Toxic Masculinity Nicky is not saying that men are bad; her list is an extremely useful tool to detect potential blind spots, and it applies to both genders. What has been normalized for you? What are the ways you cope with toxic shame and bullying? Tune in to this eye-opening episode on “Detoxing from the Patriarchy”. Download Nicky's free handout from her website at https://www.thunderandsage.com, under the Free Tools tab.

Back in 2013, my therapist said, “Love is not enough. You've got to address issues about power, sex, and money, otherwise, they will destroy your relationships.” She was right! Your partner, friend, or family member might say that they see you as their equal, but in tense situations, how do they treat you? Do they try to force their way on you? Power struggles can also start in very subtle ways. Do you tend to give your power away, or do you tend to unconsciously try to overpower others? If you want to nurture a thriving relationship that provides safety and deep connection, then recognizing and dissolving negative thoughts and power struggles is paramount. Tune in to this episode on Dissolving Power Struggles in Intimate Relationships. Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

Especially in America, women are expected to have a strong masculine side: they're expected to be high achievers, have a successful career, and be perfect parents, all while looking like fashion models and having out of this world pleasure in their sex life! But pleasure and intimacy can become elusive. There's no action plan to figure out how to surrender into the Feminine. It's quite the opposite. Tune in to this episode where Jordan shares her journey with orgasms and childbirth, and how she learned how to surrender into the Feminine.

Often when people want to place a boundary, they become rigid, forceful or detached. In other words, they withdraw their love. It sends out this message: “if you don't behave the way I want you to behave, I don't love you anymore.” That is not compassionate, it's manipulative. There is a way to share your truth and protect your needs without force or withdrawing your love. While still loving the other unconditionally, you can place firm boundaries on behaviors that don't work for you. Follow our 7 step formula to express your boundaries firmly, without rejecting the other. Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

Nobody likes to be triggered. Most people run away from them, or blame others for their triggers. Yet, there's a deeper truth about our triggers. You can get triggered at work, in your intimate relationship, or with family members. When you feel triggered, do you feel disconnected, hopeless, angry or resentful? There is an alternative. Triggers can be a chance to learn about ourselves and each other, lean in, and feel more connected! In this episode, discover a simple method that you can learn to do just that. Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

Can Trauma Healing save your relationship? We think so! When we fall in love, it's easy to appreciate everything about our special person. But soon enough, the inevitable differences arise, we poke at each other's trauma, and we get triggered. A couple came to therapy recently wanting to improve their communication skills. We soon realized that even though they were triggering each others, it was not really about the other person. 90% of their triggers were about past trauma. Definition of Trauma or Shadow: “A belief system that arises from an early core wound, that I still use to cope with the world.” 1. A belief system: “People are trying to take advantage of me. Life is fragile. I don't deserve to be loved. Everybody ends up leaving me. People don't change.” 2. An early core wound (aka trauma): A trauma can be a single, clearly defined event. Like being raped or emotionally overpowered. Or it could spread over the span of many years. My grandmother never brutalized me. But her incessant judgments over 15 years left me scared. 3. Coping with the world: This belief system has helped you cope with a difficult situation that happened when you were young and vulnerable. When similar situations present themselves into adult life, you still unconsciously use the same outdated strategies that you developed as a child. In this episode, you'll learn about: The 2 types of trauma.The therapy modalities that woks and those that don't.How to dissolve Trauma and your negative beliefs. Recommended book: No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model, by Richard Schwartz Ph.D.

Why is sexual intimacy sometimes so elusive? Television and social media show women how to look sexy and men how to appear successful. But when they meet in the bedroom, the feeling of intimacy and soul-nurturing connection can be elusive. What is the disconnect? And what can we do to reconnect? Sequoia Stafford is a sex and tantra educator, coach and therapist. She is the embodiment of a women over 50 with a thriving sexual drive. She's on a mission to take the pain and suffering out of love and sex. She's the bestselling author of It's Hard!: Sexual Satisfaction Secrets to Beat ED and I'm Not Jealous: The Ethical Non-Monogamist's Guide to Free Love Relationships Without Suffering. In her Santa Cruz, CA temple, she guides couples to find reverence in moments of intimacy and challenges them in order to open doors for sacred partnerships.  Sequoia is a master healer with over 20 years of experience training coaches and individuals to reconnect with their bodies, relationships, and sexualities. A lifetime of study has allowed her to weave together the best bits from a huge range of modalities and practices, including Neuroscience, Tantra, Shamanism, and Evolutionary Psychology. Get her books for free at https://www.freelovemodel.com as well as her Top 12 Tips for Women Who WANT To Have Sex Again!

7 Healthy Habits for Better Intimacy

How can you complain and authentically express your emotions and your truth, without creating disconnection, abandonment or defensiveness? In this episode, we explore 5 formulas you can use right away to improve your communication and create connection, even through difficult conversations. Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

What is empathy? What is it not? Empathy is the way we can feel connected, heard, seen, understood, valued, and accepted for who we are. But Empathy can be counter-intuitive… Our mirror neurons are our superpower for empathy. Yet they can also betray us! We feel uncomfortable when we feel what others are feeling. Most people will try to repress those feelings, or to change how the other is feeling, in order to feel better.  A common confusion generated by the English language is our use of the word “feel” without actually expressing a feeling. And the word “need” without actually expressing a need.  Learn in this episode how society has prevented us from learning how to express Empathy in a satisfying way, and how you can learn this the right way. Listen in to discover the secret, powerful formula to authentic empathy. Our free handout is available for download as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/ Book mentioned: The Art of Empathy by Karla McLaren

How would you like to feel connected, heard, seen, understood, valued, accepted for who you are? But, when we don't use Conscious Communication, chances are we're going to push away the very connection we crave. It's not enough to have the best of intentions, it needs to translate into the right words. When people perceive judgements, they often only see two options: either submit or rebel. This maintains a cycle of power struggles. The purpose of Conscious Communication is to express yourself in the most direct, authentic, and accurate way in order to be heard clearly and understood quickly. It's an invitation for the other to meet your needs willingly, not from pressure or guilt. Everybody wins! But it can be very counter intuitive. Conscious Communication can be very hard to learn and to apply to real life situations. It's truly like learning a new language. The confusing part is that we use English words, but in a very different way. It demands a true paradigm shift, and the learning curve can be hard and frustrating. In this enlightening episode, you will learn the #1 secret to bring connection sustainably into the relationships that matter the most to you. Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

You're on your way to your intimacy paradise. This Island is filled with an abundance of love, warm, everything you could ever want! Let's unload the cargo and get settled in. How is this exciting new place going to keep from becoming like the old place? What did you bring to your new partnership?  Join us in this episode as we identify the stowaway that is fatal to your loving comforts. We talk about understanding and unlearning embedded habits to prevent sabotaging the happiness in connections. Our free handout is available for download here as you listen in: https://relationshipalkemy.com/free-downloads/

Picture this: you have an Island that is filled with all the attributes of an intimacy paradise. What qualities are important to you in a relationship? What does intimacy mean to you? In this episode, we share mapping out your intimacy priorities and how to communicate them in a connective way. We discuss effectively removing toxic dialogue while still expressing authentically. Visit https://relationshipalkemy.com to download the free handout that comes with this episode.

Emily's questions reveal conversations about Empathy, codependency, expectations, discernment, Nonviolent Communication, Social Change, and more. Visit https://relationshipalkemy.com to download free relationship resources and information on upcoming episodes and workshops.

Who wants to talk about Relationships? Discover 3 Secrets to Greater Connection and Intimacy. Relationships can bring so much satisfaction that we feel like we're in heaven, or so much frustration that we feel like we're in hell! Our relationships, good and bad, are one of the most potent forms of soul growth. Our broadcasts are an invitation for self reflection and inner transformation, to help you embody your truth and cultivate the relationships you desire. Through our personal journey, we've discovered 3 modalities that work well together and address all potential relationship issues. Who this is for: You are single and looking for a stable partnership or companionship.You are in a committed relationship and interested in strengthening that connection.You are a parent interested in communicating more effectively with your child(ren).You value self awareness and self reflection. Events calendar and free ressources downloads at https://relationshipalkemy.com