TBTL- Too Beautiful to Live

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TBTL (Too Beautiful to Live) is a daily weekday podcast from Luke Burbank and co-host/producer Andrew Walsh. It is about life, current events, popular culture, puttering, serial boat ownership, and night pants. Hotline: (206) 414-8285.

Luke Burbank & Andrew Walsh


    • Aug 12, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • daily NEW EPISODES
    • 1h 18m AVG DURATION
    • 1,211 EPISODES

    Listeners of TBTL- Too Beautiful to Live that love the show mention: tbtl, friendos, luke and andrew, love luke, podcart, luke burbank, rawr, listening to luke, thanks luke, tens, andrew walsh, show about nothing, imaginary radio, beautiful to live, andrew and luke, imaginary friends, mike pesca, spoofs, radio in seattle, it's kind of like.



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    Latest episodes from TBTL- Too Beautiful to Live

    #3748 Cigarette Aficionado

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 12, 2022 98:19

    Luke drops by the studios of Walsh, Walsh, and Doormat for a rare in-person installment of What's In The Box, where he and Andrew open letters and packages sent to the TBTL PO Box.

    #3748 Cigarette Aficionado

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 12, 2022 98:19

    Luke drops by the studios of Walsh, Walsh, and Doormat for a rare in-person installment of What's In The Box, where he and Andrew open letters and packages sent to the TBTL PO Box.

    #3748 Cigarette Aficionado

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 12, 2022 98:19

    Luke drops by the studios of Walsh, Walsh, and Doormat for a rare in-person installment of What's In The Box, where he and Andrew open letters and packages sent to the TBTL PO Box.

    #3747 Where Everybody Lowe's Your Name

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 11, 2022 88:18

    Luke had his first run-in with Stinking Willy yesterday, and he learned a few lessons. Meanwhile, Andrew picks a fight with the internet's favorite child. And Luke has a correction to make…but not an apology!

    #3747 Where Everybody Lowe's Your Name

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 11, 2022 88:18

    Luke had his first run-in with Stinking Willy yesterday, and he learned a few lessons. Meanwhile, Andrew picks a fight with the internet's favorite child. And Luke has a correction to make…but not an apology!

    #3747 Where Everybody Lowe's Your Name

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 11, 2022 88:18

    Luke had his first run-in with Stinking Willy yesterday, and he learned a few lessons. Meanwhile, Andrew picks a fight with the internet's favorite child. And Luke has a correction to make…but not an apology!

    #3746 Exactly One Hour(ish)

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2022 79:03

    Luke and Andrew debate the advantages and disadvantages of duvets versus bedspreads, then they move on to discuss yesterday's historic Mariner's game. Plus, a listener's adventures at Lowe's teaches us all a valuable lesson. It's just unclear what that lesson is.

    #3746 Exactly One Hour(ish)

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2022 79:03

    Luke and Andrew debate the advantages and disadvantages of duvets versus bedspreads, then they move on to discuss yesterday's historic Mariner's game. Plus, a listener's adventures at Lowe's teaches us all a valuable lesson. It's just unclear what that lesson is.

    #3745 The *Idea* Of A Toilet

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 9, 2022 78:23

    Luke goes full Rear Window as he watches dog poop drama unfold in the neighborhood outside his window. Plus, a cringy TikTok video/SNL audition tape draws the ire of the internet, which confuses Andrew, since everything is cringy to him. 

    #3745 The *Idea* Of A Toilet

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 9, 2022 78:23

    Luke goes full Rear Window as he watches dog poop drama unfold in the neighborhood outside his window. Plus, a cringy TikTok video/SNL audition tape draws the ire of the internet, which confuses Andrew, since everything is cringy to him. 

    #3744 Manic Pixie Dream Zombie

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 8, 2022 81:24

    Tens of Listeners step-up to help Luke and Andrew remember some details of TBTL's past. Plus, a French scientist sent out a funny tweet and now he's forced to pretend he did it for some educational purpose.

    #3743 TBTL Unexplained

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 5, 2022 72:06

    You've got questions, we have…answers? Sort of? Luke and Andrew go through letters from listeners who want to know the origins of jokes, audio drops, and other references regularly heard on TBTL

    #3743 TBTL Unexplained

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 5, 2022 72:06

    You've got questions, we have…answers? Sort of? Luke and Andrew go through letters from listeners who want to know the origins of jokes, audio drops, and other references regularly heard on TBTL

    #3743 TBTL Unexplained

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 5, 2022 72:06

    You've got questions, we have…answers? Sort of? Luke and Andrew go through letters from listeners who want to know the origins of jokes, audio drops, and other references regularly heard on TBTL

    #3742 God Don't Make No Junk Bonds

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 4, 2022 67:25

    Andrew has been eating a lot of bologna lately, and no matter how hard he tries to avoid the topic, Luke insists on hearing the details. Luke also recalls the day he broke out of his own bedroom and got his socks all wet.

    #3741 Macho Macho Dad

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 3, 2022 61:25

    Luke reveals more details about his childhood dresser, which contained illicit football stickers and the rough-hewn lyrics of an ‘80's banger. He and Andrew also pay respects to Vin Scully and revel in the latest word salad from the Detroit Lions' head coach.

    #3740 Dill With It

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 2, 2022 66:56

    Pickle flavoring is really having a moment, but pickle-loving Luke isn't into it. He and Andrew also discuss the best and worst tools on a Swiss Army Knife.

    #3739 Shut The #%&! Up Elmo

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2022 76:43

    TBTL Friendo and Fancy Hollywood Director Cat Solen hops on the show to explain why Muppets and puppets never break character on set. Plus, a big weekend project leaves Andrew more dim-witted than usual on a Monday. And Luke tries to figure out the difference between wingdings and webdings.

    #3738 I Approve This Massage

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 29, 2022 78:27

    Luke immediately regrets his decision to sit in a massage chair in the middle of the Bismarck airport, although he did make a new friend while being publicly gyrated. Plus, a chain of chicken restaurants bought $100,000 worth of Mega Millions lottery tickets and intends to share the potential winnings with its employees.

    #3738 I Approve This Massage

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 29, 2022 78:27

    Luke immediately regrets his decision to sit in a massage chair in the middle of the Bismarck airport, although he did make a new friend while being publicly gyrated. Plus, a chain of chicken restaurants bought $100,000 worth of Mega Millions lottery tickets and intends to share the potential winnings with its employees.

    #3737 And You Don't Believe In A Mark?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 28, 2022 63:29

    Luke has a moral conundrum regarding his rental car in Bismarck, ND, and he reluctantly asks Andrew for advice. Plus, people in France are freaking out over a mustard shortage. And something peculiar has caught Luke's eye in a video of Julia Louis-Dreyfus on the set of Sesame Street.

    #3736 Will It Dunc?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2022 77:23

    Luke joins the show from the Olive Garden District of Bismarck, ND, where he's been unironically enjoying the bottomless breadsticks and salad. Plus, Andrew has a few things he needs to clear up about yesterday's “What's In The Box” segment. Meanwhile, the nation is in mourning over the death of the Choco Taco.

    #3735 Big Beautiful Books

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 26, 2022 77:37

    Luke joins the show from Bismarck, ND, where he's learning the lay of the land. Meanwhile, Andrew made his first trip to the new TBTL PO Box and found it overflowing with correspondence from Tens of Listeners.

    #3734 TBTL: Back In Caption

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 25, 2022 72:49

    Andrew is upset that his submission to the New Yorker cartoon caption contest didn't win after seeing the finalists. Speaking of the New Yorker, Luke is fascinated by a piece about the VW minibus, which was apparently somewhat inspired by something called “The Chicken Wars.”  Photo of VW minibus by OrangeChallenger, licensed under Creative Commons.

    #3733 Tom's Of Mayonnaise

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 22, 2022 79:31

    Luke does something really, really terrible during the show involving [trigger warning] coffee and mayonnaise. Plus, Dr. Oz's social media team continues to get completely roasted by his opponent's campaign. And Andrew tries to tackle the age-old question: What's worse, listening to someone talk about their dreams or listening to someone talk about their fantasy baseball team? 

    #3732 Rex In Effect

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 21, 2022 73:29

    Luke has introduced spray bottles into his relationship with his cat, and it's changed everything. Plus, a woman earned a job interview after responding to a rejection letter with a goofy meme.

    #3732 Rex In Effect

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 21, 2022 73:29

    Luke has introduced spray bottles into his relationship with his cat, and it's changed everything. Plus, a woman earned a job interview after responding to a rejection letter with a goofy meme.

    #3731 Well Behaved Kittens Rarely Make History

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 20, 2022 75:39

    Andrew is working to change the way he talks to his cat -- and all pets in general. Plus, a minor league baseball GM gets a prostate exam while singing “Take Me Out To The Ballgame”, although it's not entirely clear why. And Luke and Andrew try to figure out why they are completely uninterested in the Game of Thrones sequel.

    #3730 Schrödinger's Camera

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 19, 2022 80:33

    Luke has thoughts on the new, buzzy Nathan Fielder show, The Rehearsal. He and Andrew also come up with a new segment idea for TBTL.

    #3729 Morgan A Feeling

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 18, 2022 83:33

    Luke just got back from Austin, where he gathered with friends to pay tribute to the late, great Drew McFrizz. Meanwhile, Andrew was almost denied an opportunity to clean a big mess in peace. Plus, something very interesting happened at an Omaha airport over the weekend. 

    #3728 The Deal Hunter

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 15, 2022 79:21

    The CEO of Costco has made it clear that the store will NOT be raising prices on its cheap hot dogs, even if it is a money-losing venture. This gives Andrew the opportunity to ask Luke a very important question about the way he consumes soda pop. 

    #3728 The Deal Hunter

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 15, 2022 79:21

    The CEO of Costco has made it clear that the store will NOT be raising prices on its cheap hot dogs, even if it is a money-losing venture. This gives Andrew the opportunity to ask Luke a very important question about the way he consumes soda pop. 

    #3728 The Deal Hunter

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 15, 2022 79:21

    The CEO of Costco has made it clear that the store will NOT be raising prices on its cheap hot dogs, even if it is a money-losing venture. This gives Andrew the opportunity to ask Luke a very important question about the way he consumes soda pop. 

    #3727 Chart Of Escalation

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 14, 2022 69:27

    Andrew learns something shocking about his own past. And an article in the New York Times helps Luke understand how he became a pathological liar (JUST KIDDING).

    #3726 What A Kroc

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 13, 2022 91:55

    Luke runs into some problems in his quest to reprint an Andre The Giant photo, and it's making Andrew feeling a little panicky. They also talk about the time Ray Kroc commandeered a stadium PA system to call his own ballplayers “stupid.” And Andrew accidentally entered a humor contest while on the toilet.

    #3725 P.O.d-à-Terre

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 12, 2022 68:05

    Luke returns to the bar that has his favorite, mysterious Andre The Giant photo hanging on the wall, and he asks the owner if he can borrow it. Plus, a stolen Olympic medal is discovered in an old McDonald's bag. And Andrew is excited that TBTL finally has a P.O. Box!

    #3724 There's A Right Way To Rock And A Wrong Way To Rigmarole

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 11, 2022 84:50

    Luke has finally found true happiness, and he has video to prove it. Plus, a listener sheds some important light on Luke's recent adventures at The Home Depot. And a drunk newscaster gives it her all in Albany.

    #3723 A Work Of Dart

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 8, 2022 82:02

    Luke joins the show from Port Townsend, where he's falling in love with the small maritime village all over again. Meanwhile, Andrew (and his camera) got teased on the bus recently. And two Oregon cities are battling over a claim to “the world's smallest park.”

    #3723 A Work Of Dart

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 8, 2022 82:02

    Luke joins the show from Port Townsend, where he's falling in love with the small maritime village all over again. Meanwhile, Andrew (and his camera) got teased on the bus recently. And two Oregon cities are battling over a claim to “the world's smallest park.”

    #3722 Mayo Culpa

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 7, 2022 75:07

    Andrew does some old-fashioned, shoe-leather reporting at his local Subway shop to find out what's really going on with the restaurant's menu changes. He and Luke also offer a somewhat delayed review of No Country For Old Men. And they discuss the rise of “GentleMinions”, who are disrupting screenings of the new Minions movie. 

    #3722 Mayo Culpa

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 7, 2022 75:07

    Andrew does some old-fashioned, shoe-leather reporting at his local Subway shop to find out what's really going on with the restaurant's menu changes. He and Luke also offer a somewhat delayed review of No Country For Old Men. And they discuss the rise of “GentleMinions”, who are disrupting screenings of the new Minions movie. 

    #3721 It's My Way Or The Subway

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 6, 2022 67:26

    Andrew is very agitated about upcoming changes to the sandwich menu at Subway. Luke had a real scare with his cat, Bubbles, this morning. And a listener needs help navigating a small-ish issue with his neighbor.

    #3719 I'm Not A Lawnmower Man, I'm A Lawnmower, Man!

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 5, 2022 79:13

    Luke and Andrew began their 4th of July Weekend hoping to get a lawnmower and a dog, respectively. Today they report back on their adventures. 

    #3719 Yes, Mayhem

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 4, 2022 44:11

    Luke's attempts to get his hands on a lawnmower continue throughout the show, as he receives many updates and mixed messages from hardware stores around the Pacific Northwest. Plus, the internet is desperately trying to find the woman who won almost all the cooking prizes at a Virginia-Kentucky district  fair.

    #3718 Yo Gabapentin

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 1, 2022 78:05

    Andrew's dog-ological clock is ticking again, Luke runs into issues buying a new lawnmower, and the Marsupial Gurgle website is entering a new phase of life.

    #3717 It's A Zeller's Market

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 30, 2022 59:37

    Bubbles the Cat got up to a lot of trouble in Luke's studio yesterday, almost completely sabotaging today's show. Plus, employees at Medieval Times want to unionize, Bed, Bath and Beyond stores may be cutting air conditioning to save money, and AirBNB says “no more parties!”

    #3716 The Rural Brewer

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2022 83:47

    Andrew went to the dump yesterday, where he hoped to avoid getting “hollered at.” Results were mixed. Plus, Luke is in email hell. And a drunk man in Japan lost a thumb drive containing personal and banking information of a half a million people. Photo of Shoreline Transfer Station art by Martin Auad via Creative Commons license. The photo in the transfer station is called Terra Firma by photographer Steve McGehee.

    #3715 Jerry Of The Jungle

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 28, 2022 87:40

    Andrew's War On Blackberries leads to an encounter with a new neighbor. Luke almost struck a deal with the world's sketchiest electrician. And a listener shares an incredibly cringy story from the workplace.

    #3714 Bramblin' Man

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 27, 2022 74:43

    Andrew went to war with blackberry bushes this weekend. Luke took his shirt off at a pool party. And a Mariners fan somehow managed to get pizza delivered to a bummed-out baseball player at Angel Stadium during a game. 

    #3713 A Supremely Bad Day

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 24, 2022 90:50

    Luke and Andrew try to process the Supreme Court's decision to overturn Roe vs Wade. Plus, Andrew got fired from a job yesterday. (Sorry, it wasn't TBTL.) 

    #3713 A Supremely Bad Day

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 24, 2022 90:50

    Luke and Andrew try to process the Supreme Court's decision to overturn Roe vs Wade. Plus, Andrew got fired from a job yesterday. (Sorry, it wasn't TBTL.) 

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