Relationships, Friendships and Family Dynamics

Send us Fan MailWhen you start letting things slide in a relationship, that's often when he stops showing up as a man — as a gentleman—because now you're simply going along with everything. It's important to maintain your standards so he can hold himself to them as well. I believe many relationships begin to break down when we start allowing things we once wouldn't accept, and over time, that can lead to a loss of respect. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us Fan MailIn today's podcast, I started discussing what I believe is one of the worst types of betrayal and ended up revealing a personal secret about myself. We all have secrets, and perhaps in a future episode, I'll share more of mine. While some of my secrets may not seem troubling to others, they represent moments in my life that I wanted to change in order to achieve a happier existence. For now, though, I'll keep things light! (lol)https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us Fan MailIn this podcast, we will discuss the difference between needing a relationship and desiring one. We sometimes get confused about the two meanings, so let's talk about what it means to need or desire one. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send a textIn this podcast, I got the question of what makes a woman a great lover in a relationship, and I'm here to answer that! I think you all want to embarrass me! I'm not shy! Anyway, I put in a few things I like to do in a relationship https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send a textI received quite a few responses from my previous podcast. Some listeners feel that I might be misreading the situation, and I understand that perspective. However, it's also possible that some of you may not want to recognize the full picture of where you truly stand in someone's life. We can't keep lying to ourselves by saying that people are just busy, that things will change, or that we're overthinking it. While this can sometimes be true, there are also moments when our intuition is trying to tell us the truth. We just need to listen, even when it hurts. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send a textOn today's podcast, I want to discuss something that made me reflect on the nature of friendship. Recently, I overheard someone I was with talking to another friend. She often refers to this other woman as a “close friend,” but what I heard in their conversation suggested a very different dynamic than how she usually describes their relationship.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send a textLadies, let's be honest—sometimes we sabotage a first date by trying too hard to appear perfect. Instead of being our authentic selves, we morph into someone else entirely—a version of ourselves that we barely recognize. In today's episode, we'll discuss why it's important to let go of the perfectionist act and embrace who we truly are. By doing so, we may increase our chances of landing a second date.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send a textStandards are important because they help us protect ourselves and make better choices about the people we allow into our lives. Our standards constantly remind us that we deserve to be treated with respect. It also prevents us from having one-sided friendships or intimate relationships with partners who aren't right for us. I feel that by prioritizing ourselves and maintaining clear standards, we are less likely to accept behavior that hurts us or makes us feel unimportant.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send a textA friend went out on a date and was told she's too much of a mom. I don't agree with that at all, but I will say, don't lose yourself! 

Send a textWe're still saying yes to every date, as I mentioned in the previous podcast. And we're still keeping our standards high. We know what we want, and we're standing on it. So yes, we'll go out with you — but if you're not the right one, we'll keep dating until the right one comes along. Because we're perfectly fine enjoying our own company — even if that means finding peace in a parking lot. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

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Send a textWhen someone says, "Meet them where they are," it may sound mature to some, but I view it differently. To me, it suggests taking a back seat and remaining quiet, lowering your expectations, shrinking your standards, ignoring red flags, accepting less effort, and staying comfortable in a situation that isn't growing.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send a textIt's important to be able to move on. Yes, it's gut-wrenching, but it's needed. I talked about being able to look at yourself in the mirror and if you can't... 

Send a textI have come to the conclusion that healing on our own isn't always effective. Sometimes, we need a distraction to keep our minds engaged. I understand that some of you may not agree with this perspective, and I respect that completely. However, I encourage you to listen to the entire episode and share your thoughts with me.As promised, Lady Bird Lake will be in my stories and on my Instagram page.  

Send us a textNope, it's not about him, it's the investment!! It's a the waste of time, the things that were accumulated! 

Send us a textThis is what grief looks like. You slowly remove yourself from society. You are zoned out during conversations. 

Send us a textI've been reflecting on this a lot since my mother and Lulu passed away. It has made me think about intimate relationships, leading me to conclude that if a woman is afraid of losing everything, she is more likely to choose a better partner.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textWe date with good intentions, believing that it will lead to positive outcomes and a bright future. We often willingly allow him to take the lead. Sometimes this leadership guides us toward something beautiful, but other times it leads us nowhere, resulting in years wasted on a path that was never truly ours.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textWe are always told to look at potential. He's doing great things; he's going somewhere, as our elder would say. He's a good man, Savannah! Well, is that a great thing to do these days? 

Send us a textIt's more important than ever to have better friendships. As I get older, I realize how much I need real friends in my life—friends who genuinely care about the relationship through both the sad times and the happy ones. I want friends who will walk through the fire with me and also dance on the tables when life is good. And honestly, I'm tired of one-sided friendships—the kind where someone talks nonstop about themselves, then goes silent the moment I start to speak. You can tell they're just waiting for their turn to talk, because their favorite subject has always been themselves. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textThere's a growing trend today where many marriages resemble close friendships more than marriages. Couples are sleeping in separate bedrooms, but many aren't seeking a divorce. I would argue that it is often the husbands who are leading this trend of not fulfilling their roles as real partners. So, what is a wife to do?https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textThe best approach in any relationship is to be your authentic self. If someone chooses to end a relationship or friendship, it simply means the connection wasn't right for you. It's far worse to realize that someone is staying in your life only because of what you can offer them.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textThis year, let's commit to our promises and resolutions. I know I will, and I'm going to be my own accountability partner. So, you be yours; it's easier because we all want the best for ourselves. So, let's do it!https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textAt events, the initial greeting often comes from whoever is closest or bold enough to approach—not necessarily someone who matches your vibe, intentions, or energy. Even if the energy feels right at first, don't stop there; keep mingling. A positive first impression doesn't always indicate long-term compatibility. Sometimes, it's simply a matter of excitement, attention, or timing. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI wrote a "Dear Me" letter to myself, and I want to share a part of it. In this letter, I reflect on my journey of becoming who I am. This means I am embracing the direction life is taking me without second-guessing myself. I am following my first instincts about what I want in my life and in a partner. I encourage you to write a letter to yourself as well.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI feel like it's becoming increasingly difficult to maintain friendships with the people we have known for a long time. While we understand that meeting new people can be challenging, we now find ourselves questioning our relationships within our own group.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textSo many women are going through this; what makes it even sadder is that some stay for years or never leave. 

Send us a textI believe he had a wonderful time on the date, which raises questions about why he's not texting you regularly or returning your calls. I think it's important to date multiple people for this reason. So, let's discuss it!https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI want you and me to be very intentional about finding friends in the New Year. From here on out, we're paying attention to how people make us feel, how they speak to us, and how they show up when it truly matters. We're no longer entertaining friendships out of habit or history. We want connections that are mutual—where the support, the effort, and the energy go both ways. No more collecting friendships just because we crossed paths with someone. If she's not aligned with who we are, we don't need to entertain a conversation or a “maybe.” We deserve friends who share at least 90 percent of our values, lifestyle, energy, and mindset. That's the standard moving forward. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textWe have to be careful when letting new friends into our lives and into our friend groups. It's just like dating — we don't introduce a new guy to our friends and family right away. The same level of caution applies when we meet new friends. Take your time before letting them all the way in. It's very important to find out who they are, what their background is, etc. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI'm still going to post episodes and will continue to do all the things I have planned. I'm finally setting up my Pateron, all I need to do is add a few things. My Instagram is going to be more of a lifestyle page, showing you all the cool things about life living in Austin. I actually have a due date for my debut novel. A car accident isn't going to stop me. 

Send us a textFriendships can resemble a beehive—there's always a queen bee at the center, her trusted henchmen nearby, and the rest of us forming the outer ring, guarding the hive and politely pretending we're on board with everything.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textLadies, we need to take a real look at what it means to be in a long-term relationship with no wedding proposal in sight. With the holidays approaching, I know many of you are wondering the same thing — will this finally be the year? I'm going to share a list of honest reasons that may help you understand whether a proposal is actually coming or not. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI believe this is worth contemplating. Who is the real winner in this scenario? What really happens to him when you're not there anymore?https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textIt was a listener's question. I don't think they were being mean-spirited; I think they were just concerned because my mom and Lulu aren't here anymore.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textHoliday magic has a way of clouding our judgment. The twinkling lights, cozy nights, and festive excitement can make every connection feel deeper than it really is. But just because the season feels magical doesn't mean the person you're with is truly right for you. The real question is: how can you tell if he's genuinely a good match, or if you're just caught up in the holiday charm? https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textSome men don't stop taking until you stop giving. As long as you keep showing up, he'll keep using you. He'll drain your last bit of dignity if you let him. He'll drag your name you up and down the street if you let him. So don't just say you're done — show it. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textLadies, here's what happens when you start to be the provider in your relationship. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textThe dating scene may appear to be declining, but this often happens when you lower your standards. Many men today expect women to be the providers while they benefit from the women's efforts and finances. Ladies, maintain your standards and stop entertaining men who offer nothing but excuses. Remember, you are not their safety net. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textLadies, stop trying to do everything on your own. If you really want to achieve your dreams and go farther in life, you need the right mate — someone loyal, who shares your goals and supports your journey. Life is always better when you have a partner by your side. Two is always better than one

Send us a textWe've all fallen into this trap — opening up to the wrong people. But not everyone in your friend group is meant to hear your breakup story. Some friends carry their own hidden pain and will judge you through the lens of their secrets. I know you're just looking for comfort and a soft place to land, but remember — not everyone's heart has walked the same path as yours.

Send us a textWe do this to ourselves because we focus on the good. He's throwing red flags, but we choose to look past them. And that's how the cycle begins — dating the same man over and over, just with a different name  Sometimes, we fall in love with potential instead of reality — and that potential can lead us straight down the rabbit hole.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textA quick life update. Sorry for going missing, but I've been on the road, headed to a new destination called home. I did it scared and overwhelmed, but I made it. The key is to just do it. We we will not know what life has in store for us unless we move, unless we take a chance on us. So, for that reason, I left on Monday at 4 p.m. to travel to my new home.  Of couree, I had to stop. I can't drive 15 hours straight. But I really stop to go down memory lane, to visit the places my mom and I used to visit before she passed on August 1. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

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Send us a textThere could be several reasons for this feeling, and we will explore them further in the next episode. But here are some factors that might contribute to a wife feeling this way. In the next episode, I will speak with some married friends to get their opinions and report back to you all.https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI never knew about this, and wanted to share it! https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI have talked about this on the podcast before, and I think we need a refresher. One of the biggest decisions in life is choosing a partner. It sets the trajectory for our lives. But we have a habit of saying yes because he proposes. But really, are you ready to say yes? https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textHow many times have we all seen this behavior? He starts to act indifferent, he's not calling as much, the date nights slow down, he finds things to argue about, etc. This is the biggest telltale sign he has someone else on the brain.  https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textI had a call with a listener which brought us to the discussion of that period in life when we are having the most difficult times. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/

Send us a textWe all follow the couples that look like the perfect match with the matching outfits, exotic vacations or just simply poses like the movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith. 

Send us a textI think most men feel very confident without a job because they have a woman providing for them, but ladies, this is where you need to pay attention. Supporting a partner through a rough season is one thing, but enabling him to stay stuck and depend on you is another. https://www.instagram.com/traceylau99/